Intentional Living: The Freedom of Living Aligned with Your Values

In this episode of The Mompreneur Collective, we're talking about what it really looks like to build a life and business aligned with your values instead of constantly chasing hustle, pressure, and unrealistic expectations. 

I sit down with a fellow mompreneur and piano school owner, Jaime Varner, whose business grew from teaching just 10 students to impacting thousands through music, creativity, and intentional leadership. Together we talk about the powerful work of discovering your personal, family, and company values, and how living in alignment with them can completely transform the way you lead, parent, connect, and define success. 

We dive into:

• How values work can reduce burnout, stress, and overwhelm
• Defining "enough" for yourself as a mom and entrepreneur 
• Letting go of the pressure to be everything to everyone 
• The "pull" so many feel between work and wanting to be present at home
• Creating deeper connection with your kids at home and your team at work 
• Building a company culture rooted in shared values 
• Following your joy and passion and not letting others put you in a box 

This conversation is a reminder that success doesn't have to look like exhaustion. When you get intentional about what truly matters to you, you can stop feeling like you're stuck on the hamster wheel and start building a life that feels aligned. 

If you've been craving more fulfillment, balance, connection, or clarity in this season of motherhood and entrepreneurship, this episode is for you. 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Welcome back to the Mompreneur Collective. Or if you're a first-time listener, welcome to the show. I hope you love it here. My name is Jamie Smith, and I'm your host and certified life and business coach. And today I have a very special guest who is actually a previous client of mine. And her name is also Jamie. Jamie Varner. So Jamie started a business in the music industry, piano teaching specifically, and where she's ended up in her career is pretty impressive. I can't wait for y'all to hear her story of just massive growth and business success. But apart from that, what I'm even more excited to get into with y'all is a big part of what Jamie and I worked on together during our coaching partnership. So we took the time to discover Jamie's personal core values, her family's values, and her company's values. So we're gonna take you on a journey starting with before she had clarity of her values or lived with any intention around them, taking you to the present. And she'll share how knowing her values has impacted not only her life, but her business and the way that she shows up as a mom, a wife, a leader, all the things. So let's welcome her onto the show. Jamie, I'm so happy to have you here with us today to talk about the magic of values work. I think you, of all my clients, really embraced this work the most. And so I'm just excited to dive into it with you to hear the real life impacts of putting in the effort to get clarity of your values and then the effort to actually live in alignment with them.

SPEAKER_01 1:53

Thank you. I'm so excited to be here. Thanks for having me on. I'm really thrilled to go through remembering my whole journey and talking about it and the work that we did together.

SPEAKER_00 2:03

So I'm excited. Yes, yay. I'm so excited too. I just want to dive right in with you. I, well, you know what? Before we really get into it, actually, I just want to start off by sharing a little bit about values work with our listeners because maybe for someone out there, they've never heard of values, or this is the first time they're hearing about core values or personal values. So I want you guys to think of your values as your guiding principles. They are truly meant to be your compass in life. So I talk about defining success for yourself a lot. And you really need to do the values work first, I think, in order to define success for yourself. Because values is such a big part of how you define balance and success ultimately in your life. Your values are gonna are gonna make those things really clear for you. So that's why I start here. Values work with all of the women that I work with in my practice, because I truly believe it's the foundation to everything when it comes to creating more balance in your life and being more fulfilled in your life. So when you have clarity of your values, the hard decisions just aren't as hard anymore. Those forks in the road that we encounter, we don't get stuck anymore. That unfulfillment that we feel at times that that goes away, not all the way. We have our, we hit our bumps in the road, but it ultimately it dissipates because when you live in line with your values, you just end up creating more fulfillment based on the fact that you're living authentically to yourself and to the things that are most important to you. So, and let me say that if I were to show anyone, you know, like I showed you, Jamie, in our practice, if I were to show anyone a list of a hundred values, you might look at it and say, wow, there's like 30 or 40 words on there that are really important to me. And that's great. You can still value all of those things, but your core, core values are what I help my clients get the clarity around. And your core values, they're so authentic to you, and they're the things that are just most important to you in your life. And so, just to give some examples, mine are faith, freedom, balance, purpose, growth, and impact. And so I did a lot of work to figure out what those words really meant for me, not just according to Merriam-Webster's dictionary. And that's what I do with everyone that I work with because I think it's really, really important for you to understand not only what your core values are, but what those words genuinely mean to you. Because what freedom means to me can mean something entirely different to you. So we go through all of that together. And for me, when I started living with intention around my values, literally everything changed. I mean, I ended up leaving my nine to five and taking the leap of faith into starting my own business. And I would say that's a pretty big life-altering thing that I give credit to my values being a big part of how I was confident in making that decision and pivoting in my life. So I'm really passionate about this topic. It's one that I know for anyone listening, you're gonna get a lot out of. And if you really embrace it and work to discover these for yourself and work to live with intention around them, you're gonna, your life's gonna change and you're gonna start to notice it and it's gonna be magical. So I'm done. I'm I'm done ranting about values for now. So, Jamie, I want you to take us back to life before values work. So I want you to think about just how would you describe the way that you were operating in your life and in your business before doing the values work?

SPEAKER_01 5:45

Yeah, absolutely. Um, so I feel like I don't want to make it sound like I wasn't happy, wasn't thriving, because I do feel like luckily for me, I'm in a business where I love what I'm doing and have created it to be that. So I was happy and thriving, but I feel like it was almost like a hamster in a wheel that never stops. Like I can't get out of this wheel and it's just rolling, rolling, rolling all the time. Um, I remember, Jamie, my first call with you um our do you call it trial call, you know, um discovery call. Discovery call, thank you. Um and you went through the live wheel with me and each section that we went through, you know, you're like, hey, rate this on where you would be from a one to ten in this category. And every time I'm saying it's four or something. And then I remember you asking me, Why do you think in me saying, Well, I just don't have enough time for that? And I remember getting to the fifth or sixth category and you saying kind of jokingly, like, wait, wait, wait, let me guess. It's because you don't have enough time. And it was a really a wake-up call to me. Um, there wasn't enough time. But as we went through our coaching and and the values work, obviously um, it wasn't intentional, is really what the issue was. Um, but that's how I describe how I felt at the time is I just don't have enough time to do everything that I want to do. And I feel like the to-do list is never ending. And I'm just running myself exhausted every single day.

SPEAKER_00 7:22

Yeah. And I bet there are so many moms out there that can relate to that. I mean, myself included, when you were mentioning the hamster wheel thing specifically, that one really hit me. I was like, gosh, I just I feel like there was a time in life where I was just like wash, rinse, repeat, wash, rinse, repeat. It was just this exhausting cycle of just kind of waking up every day and doing the same thing over and over and over again. And I was, I was burnt out. I was exhausted. I was like, there's gotta be more than this to life. Like, there has to be more than just like waking up, going to work, eating some food, going to sleep, bathing, and then waking up and doing it all over again. And um, yeah, so I just want to say that I can definitely relate. And I too, I think used to feel as though I didn't have enough time to do so many things in life that are and were important to me. But like you said, and like is so important, the intentionality, if it's not there, you're missing. You're missing out on so much life that and so much of your life that you don't want to be missing out on. And that's where that disconnect or that lack of fulfillment comes from ultimately. So thank you for sharing your story of that because I guarantee you there's some other mamas out there going, I definitely feel like I'm on the hamster wheel too. And also the amount of times I tell myself, I don't have enough time, like that's such a common thought obstacle. Um, so thank you for being honest with that because it is just that. It's a thought obstacle. And I think it's important to highlight that for anyone else out there that's thinking, I don't have enough time. How is that thought limiting you in creating the life you want for yourself? How is this belief that you don't have enough time when the truth is we're all given the same amount of time? And there are people that do a lot of meaningful things with their lives and live really fulfilling lives with the same amount of minutes in a day as you're offered and as you're given and gifted in life. And so it's just a matter of how do you be more intentional? How do you use the time in a more in a more meaningful way that is aligned with your values? And so, Jamie, now I'd love for you to share maybe when we started working on the values, what surprised you most maybe during the process of identifying your core personal values?

SPEAKER_01 9:43

I feel like you mentioned it a little bit right before this, but one of the most surprising things to me was um looking at that list you sent and just at first writing down anything that resonated and ending up with 40, probably, right? And you've been like, so we're gonna pick five. And I just couldn't believe, like, how am I supposed to take these things off? And I think it was a realization that a lot of the things I I thought were of value of mine were ideas of what I thought good people do. Um, this story I had been given of this is a good person, this is a good boss, a good mom, um, this is how you're successful. And all of those words were important: honesty, gratitude, balance. I need these things, right? To be successful in my life and land in a good place. And what was surprising was as I peeled those away, and like you said, it's not that I'm going to not be an honest person now, but that isn't what drives my soul forward, is the honesty in the day-to-day or you know, the balance. Even that is important, but it's not what when I'm living it or talking about it, I am now lit up about it. It's just not that for me. And so as I peeled those away, um it was good. It felt like this is me understanding the hamster will I'm trying to put 40 values in the hamster wheel and run with them. And it's not sustainable. And so allowing myself to peel those away and focus in really alleviated a lot of um the stress, I guess, or like the busyness that I feel like I was experiencing.

SPEAKER_00 11:27

Yeah, that's so interesting. There was something that you said too that I was like, gosh, I want to speak to that. Let me see if I can remember what it was. So you mentioned in there that you something about needing to get honest with yourself. Like you said that you realized that it wasn't about choosing the values that made you look like a good human. Um and I think that that is so like, first of all, thank you for your vulnerability and for your honesty in the conversation to share that. Because I think what can be really tempting as you're doing this values work is to choose the values that you think make a good human, a good human. And it's just society influencing us, our families are upbringing, everything influencing us externally that's wanting us to like to guide our pencils or fingers to those words. But we have to really take an honest, honest look in the mirror and go, but are these values really true to me? And you use the words like light me up. I love that. Like, do these values light me up from the inside out? When I really think about them and think about where these show up in my life and what my life would look like if these five or so values were at the forefront and not muddied in the middle of maybe 40 other things that I'm just trying so hard to be. It reminds me of like in in marketing or in messaging in our businesses, right? We can either be like talking to everyone and not talking to anybody, not getting through to anybody, or we can talk to like one specific person and actually get through to someone. It's it's really kind of the same for ourselves. And I'm thinking about this in real time, but it's like, yeah, if we, if we're guiding ourselves and sending messages to ourselves that are very clear and that are very defined about this is who you are authentically and who you're trying to be and who you're trying to show up as in the world, you're gonna be so much more successful at showing up as that person when you have that extreme level of clarity versus when you're trying to just be all the things.

SPEAKER_01 13:29

Absolutely. I think also that makes me think of um another surprising thing was you know, connection came out as my ultimate value. It shows up in everything. And as I reflect on that, any time where things have been successful or where I have felt good about a situation, I have been focusing in on that. But I hadn't named it. I hadn't owned it. And so it was just sort of happening, of course, because I was um gravitating towards that, but I think in naming it and owning it, you're able to create more flow on purpose and direction with that um value being at the forefront of your mind instead of just happening as it passes you.

SPEAKER_00 14:14

Yes. Yes, 100%. And you said that word purpose, and that is all-encompassing of what really this all this work is about. It's about being more purposeful, having purpose in your choices, having purpose in how you design your life, how you spend your days every day. And so the purpose is in are you aligned with as you're making these decisions, all these other values? And so for me, one of my values is purpose. And it's because I want to stay so locked in to what is my purpose and what are the things that bring purpose to my life, make me feel purposeful in my life, because those are the things that matter. Um, so yeah, I love that. I love that. So, what were maybe just when you think about as we're in the middle of, you know, going back to the time where we're in the middle of discovering all your values, were there any habits or you know, ways of leading yourself just in your own life that no longer felt right for you, or that you felt a shift happening, or maybe even like relationships in your life, you noticed things start to change. Just share some of that.

SPEAKER_01 15:26

I don't know that anything really fell away necessarily, but it was more of a focus on the things that did matter, um, and creating space for them and doing them more intentionally. I'm thinking about right now uh a mom thing that I tried to start doing in connection was getting, like you said, really intentional about how I wanted that to show up in my life. So um, I'm a working mom. I work a lot, obviously, with my business. And being a mom is so important to me. And connecting with my kids is so important to me. And I think that when I took a minute to kind of pause and and think about how I can connect with my kids one-on-one in a really intentional way, I came up with some creative ideas that didn't mean I don't now have to work. Um, and just by focusing in on those, I'm able to do both. You know, I think that when I wasn't focused in on the connection, I'm trying to connect with so-and-so at work and my kids and everything all at the same exact time. Yeah. And then I'm connecting with no one, you know? And so getting intentional and taking the time to sit and think about it. I think that's the biggest thing is when you can name the values, then it allows you to do some thinking and some brainstorming around them and come up with almost processes or practices that you want to put in place. Um, and that made all the difference in shifting the time problem I had, the time block, into a puzzle that made sense.

SPEAKER_00 17:12

Yeah. What that makes me think of is actually what I shared about on the previous episode where I talked about the and life. So it's like you can have both this being the ambitious woman at work, and you can be the present mom at home. And what you just shared, which is so beautiful, is that discovering your values and having that clarity, being able to name your value is what allowed you to stop and go, how can I have both?

SPEAKER_01 17:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:42

And so it's what allowed you to create that and life for yourself.

SPEAKER_01 17:46

Absolutely. I think again, going back to where we were talking about seeing all these values that are good people values and trying to put them all on is too much. I think the same for how we create our life, the and you were just talking about. If I try to think about, oh, I love how this person does that with their kids, and I love this mom makes dinner every single night, and she's doing this, and I'm trying to do all those things, it's the same idea as too many values. I just can't do it. And it actually will burn me out. And by getting more intentional about just kind of peeling those layers off of picked up expectations of social norms, I guess, or things that I've witnessed throughout my life and getting really intentional with just who am I and who are my kids. It allowed all of that to fall away and to pick up things that really worked for us. Um, I'm thinking of we my husband and I talk about a lot. Um, I I heard a podcast once and I can't remember exactly who who coined this. So, but about how the most important um connection points for kids are the first five, the middle five, or transitioning five, and the last five minutes of their day every day. And so between the two of us, my husband and I, we try to be really intentional about when they wake up, we spend the first half hour of the day as a family every single day. Um, I love that. But when they transition back into our home, it's normally him on that one, but somebody is here for a while. We didn't have that. I mean, we were getting here pretty quick, but someone is intentionally there to receive them back and connect with them. And then we do a great bedtime every night. There's two of us and two kids, so it makes it nice because we swap every day. Um, but we sit, we talk about the day, we have some questions we ask, we read a book together, we watch a show together, we cuddle, and it it ends up being a pretty extensive bedtime. Um, but for me, it's the 30-ish minutes that I can connect best with them every single day. And they love it, and I love it. But I think one of the biggest things is if you're a mom where you know you've connected already or you've gone through the day and and by night that sounds like the worst thing ever to you, then you shouldn't do that, you know. And I think taking some freedom and and ownership and allowing myself to not I don't make dinner, Jamie. I cannot cook and I don't want to, and that's the last thing I want to do at five o'clock. My husband loves cooking, it's his love language to everyone. And so when I drop this expectation that I, as the mom, should be doing this, both of us are thriving. He loves it. I haven't cooked a meal in who knows how long. And and it's perfect, you know? And so really getting intentional on that creation and sitting down together and talking about it, I think is is game changer for the kids and for us.

SPEAKER_00 20:50

Yeah. Oh my gosh, she just said so much. I'm like over here, like, oh my gosh, this is so beautiful and just so full circle. So I just want to I want to highlight what she just said, folks. So she just talked about how once she had clarity around her value of connection, she took the time to really think about what does that really mean for her? And then she took the time to set the expectation for herself around it. So she looked at what is enough connection for me? What would be a good amount of connection between me and my kids that I would feel like proud of and fulfilled by and feel like I'm doing enough. And so that then translates into her definition of success around her motherhood and how present of a parent she is being. And so I mean, I literally have goosebumps because of just how powerful and impactful this work is. So she she was not only able to start connecting more meaningfully, but she also, you know, lessened the chances of her experiencing. What so many moms out there experience, which is this profound guilt over not spending enough time with their kids, or not connecting enough, or not being present enough because they're ambitious or a working mom or have all the other kids or whatever the thing may be. I literally had a session with a client about this the other day. I mean, this is real life stuff. So, how are you defining what is enough and what is good for you and what works for you and your family? And that's exactly what Jamie did. So she can at the end of every day, if she's living intentionally around this five minutes at the beginning of the day, five minutes in the middle, five minutes at the end, if they're really living around this routine and this is how their days are playing out, then hypothetically, at the end of every day, she can look in the mirror and say, like, I did enough. I showed up for my kids, I showed up in my business, I showed up with my partner, like that, and that's what this is all about. It's all about being able to look in the mirror at the end of every day and feel like you showed up as the person that you wanted to be. And so just if if there was like a fake mic that I could drop right now, I would just drop it because I feel like you just really highlighted something really special about all of this in your in your sharing.

SPEAKER_01 23:16

So thank you. I I wanted to also say that I think sometimes I was putting connection like it needed to be a 20-hour experience. And I think finding that there's actually really simple ways to connect with people and that five minutes is really meaningful if it's 100% present with someone, yeah, instead of the pull between multiple places being in several places at once, whether that's via your phone or where your feet are or whatever is going on. Um just five minutes makes a huge difference and resets everything, you know. Um, when I'm trying to answer emails or something in the home office and they're clearly wanting attention from me to pause for five minutes and go be a hundred percent present for five or ten minutes, give them a hug and head back. Um, other things that I've noticed, you know, can I pause you right there?

SPEAKER_00 24:17

Yeah. Because I think that pull that you're describing is something that so many of us can resonate with, myself included. I feel this all the time when I'm with my daughter, and it's when I'm not as intentional as I should have been with the other things that I need to be, or with paying attention to my values and letting them lead the way. But there are so many moments where I feel that pull of like, I should be working on this at work, or I have these unfinished tasks at work that I want to do, or gosh, this new creative idea just popped into my head and I just want to go write it down. But I'm with her. And so you're not fully present. And so, like Jamie said, if imagine the difference with your kid, five minutes of full present versus a full hour of you being half checked out. They feel that energy, they feel that you're not fully present. So think about this as a real, I mean, this is serious game-changing stuff that can eliminate so much of the guilt, so much of the pull that you feel, and create actually a more positive experience for your children when you're with them.

SPEAKER_01 25:24

Yeah, I love that. And again, create uh connection points don't have to be huge. One thing that I really focused in on and that I noticed I was doing is not looking at people's faces. Um, where you get so busy. Like, think I think sometimes I would go through a whole day. I'm talking to people all day long. I'm in the space with my kids, I'm playing with them, we're eating dinner, we're doing dishes. But I don't know if I looked at someone's face all day, you know? And so it's this thought I have of like, uh slow down enough to look at them. If they're talking to you, look at their face and connect. And maybe someone's value is something different, but for me with connection, that's something that I can just put in tandem with anything that I'm doing that then brings me energy instead of drains my energy and allows me to go further and fuels what I'm doing.

SPEAKER_00 26:18

Yeah, that's so good. And that's so important too. Like what you just said. It's I notice it too. Like you are making me think through just my day sometimes, you know. And I'm like, gosh, I think that there are so many moments where I'm talking to my husband, you know, and we just we're we're not even looking at each other. There'll be one or two times maybe in the day where I'm actually seeing him. And usually that's when I'm telling him bye in the morning and he's leaving me to go to work, um, or when I'm telling him hello when he gets back. But all of the in-between, we're just so rushed, we're so busy. We're so we're always multitasking. And so, yeah, that's a that's a constant re-reminder in my life personally, is to slow down. Slow down.

SPEAKER_01 27:00

Especially when you're a creative person and an entrepreneur as we are. I think you naturally have a fire to go, go, go, go, go, go. And you have new ideas and you have this fuel to keep running, which is fantastic. And if you slow down enough and get it in the lane where it goes, some of that will propel itself. And it's an energy that builds in a momentum that feels more natural.

SPEAKER_00 27:25

Yeah, it's more of an ease and flow. Yeah, for sure. Definitely. So we talked about your core values a lot. So now I want to shift into talking about some, and we really talked to, you know, some of your family values as well and just how your values have impacted your family, but maybe shifting into work values. How did you see your environment change, your culture change, or just, you know, talk to us about any kind of shift you saw when it comes to having those values defined in your corporate setting, in your team setting?

SPEAKER_01 28:01

One of the most fun things was when I, you know, I would have one-on-ones with you. And then at our next team meeting, I'd say, okay, let's come up with values. Everybody's gonna go and write down their values. And when we would come back together, everyone's list was so different. And that was another surprising and fun thing for me was to notice each person on this team has different values and we can have unified values. But one of the beautiful things about working with other people is that our values can complement each other. And as we were talking about this list of 40 values that we want to have as a successful person between the five of us at the table, we're now covering 25 of those. And so if we can figure out how to know each other's values, I think it changes the way that we interact with each other. It changes our understanding of the other people. Like I can see why that was frustrating to you because that really grinds on your values. Whereas to me, it kind of passes over in different situations, or I can see how I need to address you about this situation because this is very important to your values, or maybe you should head up this project. It feels like it's right in your lane, you know? And so by each of us defining our own values and allowing it to for us to have some differences within our team, I think we're covering a wider spectrum of what we really need to accomplish and putting each person in a spot that naturally fuels their joy and creativity and productivity and things like that allows us to get more done and be a more successful team overall.

SPEAKER_00 29:43

Yeah. And what you're speaking to right now is actually um, you took it to a place I wasn't expecting because what you're speaking to is really about just um under like having a better understanding of your teammates and what they value, which allows you to better interact with them and be more compassionate, maybe, or be more empathetic, or be more supportive when it's called for. But when it comes to actually defining the values for your whole business, so let's say, you know, your company is now operating, you're sharing with your entire team, hundreds of people, this list of five core values. How does that impact the culture when they're like, okay, these are the values that are important to our company?

SPEAKER_01 30:29

Yeah, absolutely. So we did come up with those five pillars, and I think that it allows us to spread the mission and the purpose of what we as the owners and the people running and creating the business hold and value dearly to every person that's uh having a hand in what is happening at the business. You know, in our business, specifically coming down to location managers and then down to teachers who are the people who are actually teaching the lesson to the students, making sure that as we grow and scale, every person who we're entrusting to teach music lessons at our studio has that vision of what we're trying to do. And yes, they can bring in their own style of teaching and their own mission, but at the core of it, we're all aiming for the right thing, or not the right thing. I don't love that, but the right thing for y'all for the same goal, right? Yeah. And and we're hiring and bringing on people who from the get-go are aligned with what we're trying to do. Um, I think by naming our values, putting them out there, putting them in onboarding, putting them in orientation, we're attracting people who are already aligned from the get-go instead of pieces that maybe or maybe did not fit, and then forcing, forcing, forcing, trying to figure out why it's not working. And instead, just from the get-go, clarity from us of what's important to us, and then them being able to decide, does this resonate with me? And coming into the team and just building from a place of healthy, solid roots, um, instead of trying to fix it as it grows uh made a huge difference.

SPEAKER_00 32:15

Yeah, so good. So good. So not only does it help with existing employees understanding, okay, this is how they're expecting, you know, me to show up, the guiding principles that I'm meant to operate on when I'm in these four walls or representing this company, but it also helped you find the right people initially, which I think is something that's so cool about it too, because now you're able to even tailor your interview questions around this. You're able to incorporate these values into your orientation, into your onboarding, like Jamie mentioned. And so it's like deeply ingrained in to uh not only how you identify the right players for the team, but how they know that it's the right fit for them too. And so you end up with a team that feels more like, you know, it's all the right people sitting on the right seats on the right bus kind of thing. So it's it's really cool, yeah, to see that impact. And I know that we we talked a little bit about like how your values have impacted your family too. But what I want to touch on is that when we worked on Jamie's core personal values, we did that just me and Jamie working on that together. When we worked on getting clear on Jamie's family values, she did that in partnership with me, but also going home and having conversations with her husband and with her kids on these values, even and getting their input. And so it was very much a family effort. So I don't want, I just didn't want anybody to think that just me and Jamie sat down and came up with her family values. That's something that is very um, it's all inclusive, you know, for your your whole family is going to be a part of that process and it's a beautiful thing. And so something that I want to mention is that some of your core personal values may end up showing up in those family values. There may be some overlappage there. And to that note, even with your business values and your core personal values, there may be some overlappage there as well, and that's okay, but they're not all going to be the same because it's not all about you. It's now involving other people and how we want the whole to operate and behave and the sort of rules we want people to live by that we deem are the, you know, the Varner way. That's Jamie's last name. So it's, you know, just very authentic to you. So yeah, I just wanted to touch on that really quickly.

SPEAKER_01 34:34

But can I speak to that just for a second? Yeah. Um, I remember taking my list of words into the car one day with my kids. And I mean, attention span's not long, so we didn't get through the whole list, but I tried to model almost what you did for me of what does this mean for you? Can you define it for me? You know, what uh what did when does this show up in your life? How do you feel when you experience this? Some of these questions that you ask. And it was so fun to hear my kids. The first one they pick out, I'm like, I'm just gonna read some words, tell me one that sticks out was presence. And they both, I actually had my phone. I would read the note. I have a note of um I was looking at last night uh that I had just made in my phone. But um, what does it feel like? It feels like snuggles, it feels like warm, it feels like you care about me, like some of these things that I think just having them vocalize that and me and Brian hearing them say those things that it matters to them, and then them seeing it on the wall now that we have taken that seriously and it's important. That's like making me emotional. It's important to our family that it's important to you and that we're a team and a unit. And I think it makes a big difference for them to grow up in a space where they feel like what's important to them is being heard and that we create it together.

SPEAKER_00 35:55

Yeah, so beautiful. I was tearing up a little bit too, just listening to you because it really it's just I've said it a million times already, but it's such impactful work. It's so meaningful, guys. Because I mean, Jamie, having those words up on your wall is one thing, but it's it's that tangible reminder, right? That visible reminder that these are the things that are most important to us. And it allows you for the opportunities because these conversations have been had before and because these values are present in your home, it allows for the opportunities to have conversations, to open up dialogue around these values when it's called for.

SPEAKER_01 36:30

And even another example, one of our family ones ended up being communication. And, you know, with an 11 and a seven-year-old, the conversations are different than I'd imagine they'll be at 18 and 14 or 25 and 20, you know. Um, but I love that we can have these moments of, you know, it feels like the communication is a little fiery right now. Is there a way if we look back at our values? We've talked about how we believe that we can all speak openly and share how we feel in a safe and comfortable environment. How can we model that right now for all of us, you know, and and coming back to that and using those examples is really helpful. And I hope as they grow and become adults, opens really meaningful conversations in the future as well.

SPEAKER_00 37:24

Yeah, so good, so good. But yeah, it gives you that space to be like, hey, communication is something that's really important for us. And this way of communicating, this isn't how we do things here. So let's let's look at this. What's going on? Um, and it's warranted. Like they understand why we're talking about it. This is something that's important to our family. Yeah, such good, such good stuff. Well, Jamie, I'd love for you to share a little bit more about like your actual, you know, business and a little bit about just sort of take us, you know, from I know that you've shared with me before that it ultimately all started like out of your mom's house. Um, but take us on that journey. I know we don't have a whole lot of time left here together today, but take us on that journey from starting in your mom's house to a recent merge with the company.

SPEAKER_01 38:11

Uh yeah, I figured you would ask this. So as I've been reflecting on it the last couple of days, it feels to me, just to preface, like this whole journey has been like little breadcrumbs, I guess, of just following along. I if I was looking forward, I would never have ever thought it would have ended up where I'm at right now. But each step of the way, just following what felt joyful and exciting and like the next step and pivoting and growing. Um, I I have always loved piano. It brings me so much joy. I think it shaped so much of my life. I don't really think it was a question of if I was going to teach piano, just when. And so I started teaching piano at 16. Um, I was teaching both in other people's homes in their front rooms because my mom was teaching out of my home. So I had to go to a different piano. Um, as I got married, I started teaching partly in my home in the front room and still traveling to people who I now had connections with and loved, and it wasn't an option to not teach them anymore. So um I think one of the big steps that probably all of us as entrepreneurs hit is tax realization of like, yikes. I just got slammed by taxes that first year we were married. So I opened an LLC, um, started an official business, tried to get that organized a little bit and put some guidelines um in place to help me create a legitimate business. Um that grew like crazy. At one point, I was teaching 85, I think, students per week myself. Um, so definitely full-time hours and teaching them and absolutely loving that. Um, more people kept calling and I just was saying, sorry, I really can't, keeping it a wait list. And at that point, I remember talking to my husband and him being like, I just really think that this could be something else, you know, and then us kind of dreaming that up a little bit. Um, I'm very lucky that I have an amazing sister, and she also did piano performance in college, like I did. And so I approached her about hiring her to be a teacher under my business. Um, and so she taught out of my business bedroom, and I bought a very cheap piano, painted it blue, remodeled the basement bedroom to be a studio, and she taught down there, and I taught upstairs, and we both did it full time all day, every day. Um and it got to the point where I loved it and it felt like we needed something new. Um there was 150 kids coming in and out of my house every day or every week. Honestly, I cherish that. There was a time where we were, you know, sitting at the table eating dinner, the four of us now of our little family, and there's kids just because they just walk in, walking in and hi Miles, how is cool? Okay, yeah, Maddie's downstairs, you know, and they and they'd walk on down. And and I loved that. And we love those families that came into my home. But I knew it was time to move this out of our house. And right around that same time, um, Sarah Davies, who had started the piano place, reached out to me and said that she had gotten my name from someone in the neighborhood and they were building a new location right down the street from my house. And would I want to move my business in? And I went and met with them. And when I left, I have never in my life had a knowing like I knew in that moment that this was it for me and that we needed to do this, and this would be an incredible experience. So we moved my studio into that studio, and for a couple of years, I managed that studio and had I took some phantom ownership of it with them, so co-owned that studio. And then from there, Sarah and Brady asked me to help them to come up and be the COO of the piano place and help them to expand this business and grow it. And so we did that, and we decided that we were going to buy in and be investors in this business and take even bigger ownership in it. And I remember standing on our favorite beach in California saying, like, are we really actually gonna write a check for this amount of money and hand it to them? This is I I said, I'm terrified. Like, I'm so excited and I'm terrified. And he said to me, I don't think it's scary at all to invest in yourself. Like, I believe in you, you can do this. Like, we know this is gonna work out. So we did it, we jumped in, and from there, it's just history of you know, expanding to 12 piano places. Um, we decided to open a parent company called One Music Schools and start working with and purchasing music schools across the nation. Um, and so in just a couple years' time, we grew to 32 music schools that we're operating and and helping with. Um and then most recently we merged with a company called Ensemble, which is a beautiful network of uh performing arts, dance music for children across the nation. And it's been an incredible experience um networking and merging with them and just being a part of an energy of people who are so highly dedicated to sharing arts with people. And so really, like when I think about me sitting and teaching 10 people music lessons either in their front yard or my or front rooms or my mom's, and I find I found a like ledger I was keeping of income and I was like $700 a month or something like that, you know. Um, from that, and then just in maybe 10 years time working with ensemble and getting, you know, to the point that we are in the network that we have. Is something I could have never imagined. And one thing that really resonates with my heart a lot is the idea of a ripple effect. I could have never imagined that starting teaching music and trying to spread that through community would ripple as large as it has now. But it's like an absolute honor to be involved in something like that.

SPEAKER_00 44:22

So yeah. And what is that ripple effect from 10 people to how many hundreds of people are under the umbrella now?

SPEAKER_01 44:28

Oh my gosh. Yeah, I I don't even know. I mean, under our one music schools, we have about 7,000 students. Yeah. Um, and then we work with ensemble who has all of their schools, you know. It's incredible. I always like to think of even though there's 7,000, every person is a person, every individual is an individual life. And the network that that individual life, I always think like there's one Jamie in there at least, who's going to go and teach music or in so many different capacities. Be a speaker, share music, play music, teach music, or take the lessons they learned in music lessons and start something totally different. But out of those lessons, they've done something. And that ripple effect is innumerable, honestly. And so yeah, it's just such an honor and joy to have been along for this ride.

SPEAKER_00 45:16

Well, give yourself a pat on the back if you haven't lately, because it's pretty impressive. It's incredible. You know, the sky's the limit. There is, you know, there's no glass ceiling.

SPEAKER_01 45:26

Yeah. I think that one lesson I've really learned is if you have what brings you passion and you have what you really care about, you can make it into whatever you want to. If you can get creative enough and be willing to take enough pivots. Um and I think that, you know, if we're trying to force something that doesn't align, it's probably not gonna work out. But if you can get really clear on what you want to do, you can create it into whatever you want. I remember my school counselor in high school saying, What do you want to do with your life? And me saying, I want to be a mom and a and a piano teacher. And her saying to me, Well, that's not gonna be able to support you. So let's come up with some other ideas. And thank goodness that went in one ear and out the other. Because I understand what she was trying to say, but she was taking a box and she was putting it on me and saying, This is box called piano teacher slash mom. And she wasn't wrong. It's not that is a hard job to make fully life sustainable. Um, but for me to say, no, it is what I want to do, and I think it creative enough to create it into a business. And there was so many layers. And I think that sometimes we limit ourselves, like you said, the glass ceiling. We put that ceiling, that box around ourselves. And it doesn't allow the imagination and the creation to flow into something totally different. So I've had, you know, friends before that are like, oh, I love doing this thing. I wish I could make it into a job. And I'm that annoying friend that's always like, Well, why can't you? I think you could. Let's talk about it. You wanna you wanna brainstorm? Like, I'm over here, let's talk about it, you know. And and I have to be like, Do you are you wanting to brainstorm? Are you just saying that as a comment? Because I could talk about it all day. Um, but yeah, I think we can turn anything into something if we want to, and if we're willing to put the work into it.

SPEAKER_00 47:25

Yeah. Amen to that. I agree. I agree. I'm with you. I'm that annoying friend as well. Well, Jamie, this has been such an incredible conversation. We went so many places I wasn't expecting it that made it just even elevated the conversation even more. So thank you for all of your wisdom and everything that you shared today. And I would love to just close out the episode by you sharing to any of the moms out there that are listening that maybe feel unfulfilled in their lives currently or maybe feel a little bit disconnected or a lot of it disconnected from themselves. Share any words of wisdom you have around the values work specifically and how you feel that if they do this work, it can really help them reconnect with who they are.

SPEAKER_01 48:08

Awesome. Yeah, I think that one of the biggest pieces of advice I have is to get really real with yourself and know that you're relatable. Um, I think that when I started talking about how hard it is to be a mom and working, or even just a mom, I would tell these stories out loud and then have someone say, Oh, me too, and share a story back. And I think that us just being open about the reality of um a kid pouring like spices on the ground and making a sandpit while you're in a work meeting, or like, I don't know, I have so many of those stories, you know, or like me being at the construction building final walkthrough of our fifth building with a baby on my hip and a toddler in my hand. And that's real, that's real life. And there's more people doing it than maybe you think. You might feel alone and you might feel like it's hard, but um, I think that us reframing our relationship with resistance and and knowing that we can do it and that it's normal and we're all going through it and finding our network is an absolute game changer to just the experience. And I know that doesn't really speak to values, but I think just the first layer is just knowing that it's part of it, it's part of life, it's part of building and being a mom. And and and then once you've done that and you can laugh about the things, then getting really clear on your values um and taking the time to dissect them. But in the long run, it's something that nurtures the roots of your life instead of continuing to just, you know, water the branches and and trying to make it work. Like if you can take the time to dedicate to just really rooting yourself and grounding, then things flow a lot easier. And I really feel that it makes a big difference.

SPEAKER_00 50:03

Awesome. All right, y'all. I hope you enjoyed today's episode. If you did, share it with a friend. If you want to learn more about or connect with Jamie, her links will be in the show notes, as well as links to learn more about working with me as your coach. If today's episode really resonated and you're tired of feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, feeling resentful or guilty or burnt out, getting clarity around your values can really help with all that. So if you're ready to discover your core personal values, or maybe you're ready to get clarity around your business values, I'm so passionate about doing this work with my clients, and I'd love to chat more with you about guiding you through this process and through this journey. So those links are in the show notes, and until next time, y'all. Cheers to raising humans and building something meaningful.