I Walk Away From Stability Because The Plan Says It Is Time

The best decisions don’t always feel safe, they feel true. After a midnight concert in a small Spanish mountain town, we find ourselves wide awake at 3:34 a.m., full of gratitude and questions about the price of a creative life. That one night becomes the doorway into a story about passion, timing, and the moments that prove why music is worth the risk.

We take you back to Los Angeles where the “smart” path looks perfect on paper: a thriving corporate role at Kaiser Permanente with a promotion, strong benefits, and the kind of security your family begs you to protect. But the day job grows toxic, the music life keeps pulling harder, and the real question forms: do you stay for stability or leave with intention? We walk through the practical side of making a big career change, including building a nest egg, lining up temp agency work, setting a resignation deadline, and using jam sessions and community to grow a reputation in the LA music scene.

Then the plan starts paying dividends. A teaching job at a major Hollywood music school keeps the income steady and the craft sharp. A club audition leads to consistent work. A major pop star tour begins assembling a band, and suddenly preparation matters more than hype. We talk audition mindset, doing your homework until the songs live in your body, and how to spot fake gatekeepers who promise “we’ll get back to you” while the real opportunities move quietly in the background.

If you like stories about musician life, career decisions, touring auditions, and building creative freedom without pretending it’s easy, hit play. Subscribe, share this with a friend who’s standing at a crossroads, and leave a review. What’s one decision you’re still proud you made?

Transcript

A Night That Reminds Me Why

SPEAKER_02 0:33

Hello everyone. Welcome to a new episode of the Music of a Life Well Played. And this is the opening for the new episode, Decisions Decisions. And before we begin, I want to tell you why I'm sharing this now. I've been doing this music thing for a long, long time. Happily, lovingly, and thankfully. And I know that because of nights like this, picture this. Picture a pueblo. Naturally beautiful and picturesque against the backdrop of a dramatic, star-strewn moonlit sky, high in the mountains of Spain. It's summer, it's late, way past midnight. The concert is over, but this night of magic is not. The stage is set right in the town square with moonlit mountains directly behind the stage, like it belongs there. The air is warm with a sultry breeze. It's electric. The square is alive and glowing. Not just with light, but with happy people, still intoxicated by both libations and the smell of the content we had just played. Some of you know this vibe. Some of you have had nights like this. Families, friends, lovers, old folks, and young ones. Kids still playing, babies asleep in arms, while the DJ keeps playing and the music keeps going on. People eating, drinking, laughing, and still riding the joy of what we had just shared together. Because we drove them, we kept them dancing, vibing, singing, and celebrating life and having a wonderful time. And me, I'm a life after concert club. In that came with magic, that out-of-body experience from which has occurred. Not wended, not impatient, not eager to get back to the hotel. Just really good vibes. When it's good, it's really good. For me, this stuff is amazing. Times like these help me to remember, and times like these let me know I have the best job that I could ever have for me. And I'd like that here. I don't like that here from my very beginnings and this came from you to this place. To this life. After the show, nobody rushes around. Many times people come out to me excited and happy. They want to talk. They wanna put me in the eye, they wanna say about the nightmare to them. Sometimes they tell me they money, they die my career, and they're so happy to see me and they're seeing my time. There are so many amazing moments. I had the pleasure of meeting these amazing 15-year-old young ladies, musicians before the concert. They were full of energy, passion, and curiosity. They reminded me of me at their age and why I do what I do. Honestly, they made my dear. They hung out on the side of the stage to cheer on the band during the concert. And afterwards, they had presented me with some friendship bracelets that they had made before the show. And little things like that are so powerful and meaningful.

Gratitude After The Applause

SPEAKER_02 4:06

And these are some events where I think about decisions I made long ago and how they've shaped the experiences of today. And what a great night it was to be done. So now, back to our story. People generally always ask me that question. What are you doing here in my small town, in my small pueblo, in my town, my city? And they might say, I saw you on TV, or I saw you here at this concert or that concert. What are you doing here? And I'll tell them every time. For me, it's an honor. It really is. For me, it's a pleasure and an honor to be doing music and and traveling and meeting people all over the world and sharing my passion with them. Yes, I'm wonderful. From my country, or from my friends there and my family. But I get to make new family, I get to make new friends, I get to discover this beautiful place, doing what I love to do, doing music. It's a wonderful experience for me, and I'm blessed to be able to have it. And these small pueblos can be the most rewarding, the most fun, the most memorable. And those are the times when I become extremely grateful and very thoughtful about my life. I play concerts, festivals all over state, north, south, east, west, and in towns and cities all over the world. And I love something. The movie is in the landscape and in the heart of the people. So, after nice like this, when the square finally empties, when the music fades, and I go back to my hotel room, it's 3:34 in the morning and I'm wide awake. I'm not exhausted, I'm just full, and grateful, alive, feeling pretty damn good. Like I can do the whole night all over again. And that's when it hits me. I've been doing this a long, long time, and I'm still here, and I'm still loving it, I'm still strong. And then that's when I become intense and thoughtful about music, about love, passion, about age, health, beauty, and as a female musician, that's a big conversation about the discernment, vitality, second chances, betrayals, the big one, the decisions and the sacrifices, and about the simple kingdom. These are the questions that I and we will share together on this journey. Not all today, but some stories I will tell slowly, and some later. Some may be in a different season or in a different format. Because of this, really is the music I will like when we play. Now let's get to our story.

Thriving In A Day Job

SPEAKER_02 7:16

Hey everybody. Welcome back to my podcast, The Music of a Life Well Played. So the name of this episode is Decisions Decisions. Um, we'll get back to you. Well, we all know the story. Musicians have to work a day job to support their music. That's just the way it goes, at least in the beginning. So, let's start here. At the time, I was working as an administrative assistant in the personnel department of Kaiser Permanente Middle Group. Sort of in the heart of Los Angeles. And you guys, I was not just working, I was thriving. I had recently received a major promotion to executive secretary, to the executive director of personnel. For me, it was a big deal. The salary was excellent, the benefits incredible. Full pension, room to grow, full medical and mental all covered. The kind of security that people prayed for. And the kind of job your family tells you don't mess this up. My boss really valued my work. I was seen as dependable, sharp, capable. I have built a solid reputation. From outside, it looked like I had it made. But here's the thing. My life did not stop at 5 p.m. So while working full-time, I was also playing in two or three bands all at once. Evening rehearsals, weekend gigs, studio sessions, some original projects, some for other artists. I was writing, practicing, building a schedule was ridiculously relentless. And somewhere in the middle of all that, see the literacy. A tall, handsome, radiologic technologist bulldozed his way right into my life. He'd suddenly have questions about this and that, always finding a way to stop by my desk. And it didn't take long for those questions to turn into invitations. So yeah, life felt full, exhilarating, rewarding, and challenging. And it was, until it wasn't.

When Security Turns Toxic

SPEAKER_02 9:49

Because underneath the surface, my day gig had started to grow horse. There were brutal office politics, backstabbing, racial tensions, unfair and frankly, illegal practices happening while my music was slipping away. At the same time, Kaiser was replacing goodbyes with hard decisions. They were altering hours, increasing workloads of departments. People were confused, discouraged, and disillusioned. Even though management valued me, even though they were trying to keep me happy, the atmosphere just began to be toxic, heavy, restrictive. And something inside of me began to feel tied down. Not just luster, but just tired. I felt myself shrinking inside of a system that was supposed to be secure, miserable, and I felt that it was supposed to be a blessing. So the question arose, do I stay or do I make another big decision?

Building A Five-Year Exit Plan

SPEAKER_02 11:13

This time, I did not leave immediately. I thought, I calculated, I prayed. And I came up with a five-year plan. And it goes like this. Number one, build myself an estate, something to solve at the landing. Number two, register with five, ten temporary employment agencies. Number three, set a resignation deadline, not a vague dream, a big and actual date. Number four, make a master list of every serious jam session in Los Angeles and the surrounding areas, attend them all consistently, make myself visible, expand my name, my network, and my reputation as a musician. Look, if I was going to walk away from security, I wasn't going to do it blindly. I was going to do it strategically. And baby, you're not gonna believe what happens next.

Giving Notice Without Negotiation

SPEAKER_02 13:32

It was time to put in my two-week notice from Kaiser Permanente and once again get the hell out of Dodge. I had checked off all of the points of my list. Nest egg, done. Temp agency work lined up, done. Resignation letter was deadline done. Jam sessions, making myself visible, making my plane visible, done. And it was time to pull the trigger.

unknown 14:06

Bam!

SPEAKER_02 14:07

And guess what? It did not take five years. And ooh, my boss MJ, she was not happy. So she decided to try to make it more difficult for me to leave. She sat me down and said, tell me what you want. How much? What changes? Give me a number. I have to admit that it was a little difficult. Only because I had to speak to her. Not because she could change my mind. Because none of this could change my mind. It was just time for me to go. So I let her know in no uncertain terms that there was no room to negotiate. It was just time for me to leave. Well, well, wonders never cease. A dear friend of mine, an awesome musician, whom I had played some gigs with, he helped me get this position at the biggest contemporary music school in the world, which was located in Hollywood, California.

Teaching Music In Hollywood

SPEAKER_02 15:17

A position for music professor. There, I taught live playing workshops, wrote curriculum for some music courses, I taught private lessons, and led open counseling sessions. This was a wonderful job for me. I could completely immerse myself in music from a different aspect, from the aspect of teaching as opposed to playing. And I loved it. Collaborating with musical peers, teaching and mentoring young musicians from all over the world was incredible. And the job fit perfectly with the direction I was going in my musical endeavors. It also fit perfectly into my five-year plan. The flexibility and the ability to keep the bucket flowing, if you know what I mean. The big win after the big gamble. Well, I shouldn't say gamble, but it was there was more planning than a gamble. Remember my five-year plan? Well, it was working like gangbusters. Not only did I land a job at the biggest contemporary music school, I began meeting and playing with so many wonderful and amazing musicians. And that led to getting my name around and my playing out there. And that led to auditions. To keep things flowing, I'm just gonna focus on this one particular situation.

The Club Audition That Opens Doors

SPEAKER_02 17:03

We'll call this one, um, we'll get back to you. I had gotten a call from Mr. K, the leader of one of the hardest working and best local bands in the Los Angeles area. Mr. K was a very talented singer and saxophonist, and always had a great band and worked a lot. He told me his bassist was retiring from music and asked if I would come down to the club where they were performing and play and sing several songs, sort of like an audition. I said yes of course. So I came down, did the audition, it went great, and a couple of days later he called me and said he would love for me to become a permanent member of the band. I said yes of course. Another win. Music school during the day, working with Mr. K's band in the evening, shortly after joining the band, we were working consistently. Different clubs, different venues, the band was great and we had a lot of fun. Now, Los Angeles has always been a very big hub for major artists to look for musicians and put touring bands together. And auditions were happening all of the time. Then this buzz

The Big Tour Audition Buzz

SPEAKER_02 18:40

started. A giant pop star of the time, who I refer to as DO. He was going to be holding auditions for a major new tour and promoting his latest album. And the audition was the talk of the town. It was actually the talk of the country because musicians would be flying in from all over the country to audition and it was a really big deal. So one day I got a call from a man who said he was representing that he was representing DO. He told me that he had gotten my number. Um, I'm not sure where, but I think that he was helping out putting a band together for DO. And he said he would like to hear me play. And as it happened, of course, I was playing that weekend with Mr. K's band. So I said great and I invited him to come down. So that night we were in very good form. And I felt great about anyone walking in to hear me play. So he came in with another guy, and I immediately knew when he walked through the door that it was him, them. And so at the end of the set, at the end of the set, he came and walked over to me. And I remember the impression that they made on me. To this day. The representative, whose name I don't remember, so let's call him Steve. Why not? Not very tall, average looking man with a receding hairline and a suit. He was giving off the air of, I think I'm somebody, so I think you should think I'm somebody too. The second guy, I'll call him Bob, who was even shorter than the other guy, with slicked back hair with way too much gel in it. They were quite a pair. They introduced themselves, immediately began talking about DO, and how they had been bestowed the honor of putting the band together, and how many musicians they had seen and how much work they were going to be doing with DO. And it seemed to me like they were trying to get me to seek their approval as some lowly musician who should be happy to be speaking with a representative of DO. I don't think either one of them made direct eye contact with me. They didn't ask me any questions, and within a very short time of meeting them, I understood exactly what was up. So, so with a smile on my face, I stood there and let them bottle themselves up.

SPEAKER_01 21:52

Finally, Steve said, Well, we've got lots of other musicians to see in here. And we're very busy, so um, we'll get back to it.

SPEAKER_02 22:08

If I had had a drink, I probably would have snorkeled it out of my nose trying to not laugh. And I thought to myself, okay, freaking frack here are a couple of self-important assholes who don't know nothing about music. After they left, Mr. K, who had been watching

Fake Gatekeepers At The Gig

SPEAKER_02 22:30

from nearby, saw the whole thing and walked over and said, What the f was that? We both left and packed up and left for the night. The next day, I got a call from Lori, who was the actual personnel assistant and secretary of the Oak. The very ones calling me. So she told me she had got my number from Karen, a great keyboard player and great musician. And she, Lori, wanted to schedule me for an audition. Hallelujah. Y'all, I was excited. And again, I thought about how well, how well my five-year plan was working. Here I was, not chasing the audition, but being called directly by DO's management. Meanwhile, the buzz about the audition was everywhere. Everybody was talking about it. At the music schools, at concerts, everybody knew about it. How long it was, how much it paid, all that good stuff. So musicians were coming from all over the country. Big name players. So I did what I was always advised to do when going after a big dream, audition, or opportunity.

Homework That Makes You Ready

SPEAKER_02 23:54

Do your homework. I did my homework. I immediately got to work researching the project. I bought the album before my package came, and I immediately got straight to work. I didn't just learn the songs. I lived the song. Practiced, listened, listened, practiced, and practice some more. I learned every vocal part, every harmony, every groove, every part of the music. Went to sleep with it. I knew the songs in and out by heart and I could play them in my sleep. On the day my audition came, I was ready.

A Magical Audition And Callback

SPEAKER_02 24:39

The audition was magical. It was held at the most amazing professional facility in Los Angeles. And this place had a magical vibe to it. It was a creative oasis. When I walked into the building, it just felt good. There was this warm sensation in my chest that day. I don't know, maybe it was just joy. And the times when I get that warm feeling in my chest, something good was always about to happen. When I walked into the rehearsal room, inside were the manager, Lori, the assistant, the one and only DO, and the keyboard player who had already been hired as musical director, and the guitarist had already been hired as well. And guess what? The two of them had just come directly off of a Michael Jackson tour.

unknown 25:52

Wow!

SPEAKER_02 25:54

Yes, the Michael Jackson tour. Now I don't want to say specifically which Michael Jackson tour it was because I don't want to give too much of it away. And there I was setting up my bass, about to play with exactly the level of musicians and professionals I had always dreamed of and worked so hard to play with. And even better, some of the musicians who were finishing out the band were players that I already knew from the music school and from gigs. So I knew the sound was gonna be great. My audition could not have gone better. Every test they threw at me, I was stellar. I floated through it. When it ended, DO, the manager, and the musical director all came over and gave me a kiss on my cheek, all three of them. They told me that they wanted to invite me to the callback audition. And for those of you who don't know, when you get the callback audition, that basically means that they're bringing back the finalists, and in many cases, that means you got the gig. So what a day! A little bit about the callback. The callback was the exact team minus a couple of musicians, almost the exact team of the audition, the first audition, were at the callback. We all acknowledged each other and we were all really giddy and happy about it. And when we struck up to play, it was magical. DO was happy, the musical director was happy, management was happy, and everybody, nobody could stop smiling. It was like we all instinctively knew that this was the team.

The Offer And The Last Laugh

SPEAKER_02 28:12

So a day or two later, I come home from the music school, check my messages, and there it was a personal message from the one and only DO in his words saying that he would love for me to be the bassist for his new tour. I think my sister-in-law was in the other room when I got the message, and I ran and told her, and she was just screaming and jumping up and down, and I was screaming and jumping up and down. I had landed the spot from all those players across the country. And here's the bonus to that great story. Rehearsal started about a week later. The atmosphere, the professionalism of the crew, the energy of the rehearsal space, the temperament of the musicians and the artists, everything about it was just wonderful. Everything about it was remarkable. Every day, rehearsals were just fun and magic. Just wonderful people and amazing talent. And I knew it was something special. I knew I had done something good. And D DO himself was just a personable, funny, and incredibly talented guy. And it was great just getting to know him at the rehearsals. So I had been in the back of my mind always wondering if I would be able to uh to ask him about the experience I had before at the audition. So one day at rehearsal, I finally asked him about Steve and Bob or Frickin' Frack. So I explained how they had approached me at the club and how they claimed that they were putting the band together. And I also mentioned that I noticed during the audition and rehearsal process that they were nowhere to be found. And so I asked if he knew them. And D Dio said, Oh, those guys? Yeah, they they made an appointment to come make some proposal about putting a band together or something like that. I don't know them. I never gave them any permission to do anything. We'll get back to you. Sometimes you just sit back and say to yourself, I knew it. But I definitely got the last laugh because, of course. They never got back to me. I didn't need them to because I had the kids.