The People Along the Way

The People Along the Way

We've all heard the saying, "It takes a village," but what if our village doesn't always look the way we expect?

In this episode, we're talking about community, the people who walk alongside us through different seasons of life, and how sometimes our greatest sources of encouragement come from the most unexpected places. From lifelong relationships to brief encounters that leave a lasting impact, this conversation is a reminder that we're rarely as alone as we think we are.

If you've ever felt isolated, struggled to find your people, or questioned whether anyone was truly in your corner, I hope this episode encourages you to look back and recognize the people who have helped shape your journey. Some were there for a lifetime, others for only a season—but every one of them mattered.

Because maybe your village has been there all along.

—

🎧 Her Playlist:
• "Lean on Me" – Bill Withers

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Honor your path. Honor your pace. And always give yourself grace. 🤍

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

You've got a friend in me. Oh, you've got a friend in me. Don't know the rest of the words, but you've got a friend in me.

SPEAKER_02 0:26

Let's get it. Welcome to welcome back to Her Path, Her Pace, where Growth Meets Grace. I am your host, Shay. And thank you for joining me again on another lovely Tuesday. Oh my goodness. Let's go ahead and dive right in with life lately. Oh y'all. So we had the family reunion. The family reunion was so much fun. You know, family is family has its ups and downs and some things. And you know, it was a little chaos. It was a little little this, a little that, and all those things. But you know, we made it through. It was fun. We went to Gallenberg, got to see family that I haven't seen in a long time. Got to spend time with my favorite cousins. It was just like a ball of a time. And um I got to oh, I got to, you know, get more poker chips for my whiskey trail thing that that's going on that the I think it's a Tennessee thing only. Where like all of the distilleries, the whiskey distilleries have um like in Tennessee, or like have this thing where they all come together and you can you can collect poker chips. It's called the whiskey trail, basically. I don't know if it's just a Tennessee thing, but I got the one for Tennessee, and so I got to collect another chip, and I went to uh the moonshine distillery, got to collect chip, a poker chip from there. Yeah, and I had to do schoolwork, so I didn't get to get the sugar land one, but my brother gave me his, so I'm counting it as mine because I got it, but yeah, it was so fun, it was nice, like I said. You know how family trips go, family things go. You got some good, got some bad, and you got some, you know, it's okay. But all in all, it was a good trip, and I'm so happy we went. I'm so happy I got to go.

SPEAKER_00 2:40

We saw bears, y'all.

SPEAKER_02 2:42

As many times as I've been to Gatlinburg or four family trips, we've never been there when the bears are awake. The bears were alive and awake, and we saw a mama bear and her cub, and they walked, I mean, um they walked around like they own the place. I mean, they they do, they do own the place. It is they land, and we was in their home, but you know, they had no sense like I definitely was way more scared of them and more worried about them than they were about me. And let me tell you how little me, Loche, Roche, Roche, Sha Shay, I had my little booty in the house, okay? The moment because we had left and we were going to um a go-kart place, and as we were getting ready to leave and walk out the door, we on standing on the patio, the porch, whatever, waiting for um some people to come out. And while the baby cub, he came around the corner, he walk down the street. Y'all, everybody was like, Oh my goodness, the bear, the bear. I said, Where? As soon as I saw it, as soon as it was in my line of sight, vision, I put my I walked my happy butt on into the house. I politely exit stage, left. Okay, I was not, I mm-mm, I send me the videos. Y'all can send me all the videos in the world. Just being that close to a bear was too much for me. Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_00 4:09

I I I I y'all know. I fear, yeah. Yeah, no.

SPEAKER_02 4:15

Just send me the videos. I can live vicariously through the videos. I was in the place, I was in the area. I ain't need to be no closer than that. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. But yeah, it was funny. Like I got to spend it with my sister, my older sister, and uh her husband, which was also like a big, big, big plus that I talked about um a I think a couple episodes ago that I was like, I was really looking forward to. Because we don't get to spend as much time together because they literally live across the country. Um so that was just like really nice, and that was fun. And I got to get some quality chai with my sister and my brother-in-law. He's actually pretty cool, he's a pretty cool man. Um, I mean, yeah, gotta be pretty cool me and my sister, but you know, yeah. Um, but all in all, like I said, great trip. I enjoyed myself, I enjoyed my family. I enjoy being able to spend time and connect, oop, connect and spend some time with them and everything. Cause yeah, it just had it's been a long time since we've done anything like all together as a family, and so that just it was really nice, it was fun. Um, what else is going on? And I know how I just was talking about how the term ended and I got an A in the class, you know. Well, y'all guess what? Another one is about to start. I'm literally about to start another one, and I just I'm just like, okay, we got it, we got it. The finish line is in sight, it is in view. We got this girl, but y'all, see, I'm already tired of thinking about it, but we almost there, we almost done, and that's what I it's okay, it's gonna be great, and I'm gonna be so happy once it's done, and like I did that, I accomplished that, I pushed through, and yay, God, thank you, God, for helping me get through. But right now, I'm a little tired, a little weary, but you know what? It's gonna be okay. We're gonna start this term off strong, and it's gonna be great.

SPEAKER_00 6:25

Great, okay.

SPEAKER_02 6:28

But yeah, that's really all that's going on in my life, in my world. What's going on with y'all? Sorry, Jaguar is just being Jaguar right now. I don't I don't understand. I really, I really don't. He was literally just so calm, not even three minutes ago. So I don't, I don't know. Anywho, like I was saying, what's going on with y'all? Like, what's new in your world? Have you guys like when was the last time y'all had a family reunion? Or do you even just did like a family vacation or even just a big family outing? Because I feel like it's been a while for like maybe, maybe not, but for a lot of people that I've known and like have met over the years, it's been a minute since like people have like actually had big family reunions, family gatherings, and things like that. So, like, have when's the last time y'all had one and stuff like that? And just what's going on in your world? Just let me know down in the comments below. You know, talk to your girl, engage with her, engage with her. Um, I want to know what's going on in your world, daily life, anything new and exciting happening, just comment down below and let me know. Just go ahead and share with the with the with the community, with us, with the peoples, with me. Yeah, but cool. So now that we are all caught up with what's going on in life, let's go ahead and talk about the glow-up goals. So, ending with this episode's main topic of discussion. I wonder if you guys can guess it based off of this glow-up goal. Okay, so I want to leave you guys with a journal prompt for the week. And I want you to write thank you letters. Thank you letters to whoever you want to thank, honestly, for whatever reason, for whatever they did, didn't do, even if you want to say shout out to my haters, you know. I don't, I don't know. But like, write thank you letters as a journal prompt and like list out the things that you're grateful for and thankful for, just to have a reminder, because I believe sometimes we we can get so well, let me not say we. I know for me personally, sometimes I can get so clouded and e stuck in something that's currently happening that I forget all of the things that I have to be grateful for, and not saying because I I do hate, well, not hate, hate is a strong word. I do dislike when I'm struggling and people are like, oh my gosh, you're gonna. I'm like, that's not what I'm saying. This is not a comparison game. I don't care if she who and ha ha and no new all got it worse than I got it right now. That ain't the point. Um, but I digress. I just I personally feel like you know, sometimes you do need a reminder of what you're grateful for and things that you are thankful for, not just things you're thankful for, but people that you're thankful for. Because I feel like sometimes you can forget. And like I said, in the world, crazy things, life happens, and being stuck in a negative moment, negative season, or negative place or whatever environment, whatever the case may be, can cloud your judgment, you know, cloud your vision. And you can lose sight sometimes of the things that you do have to be grateful for and thankful for, and the people that you have to be grateful for and thankful for, past and present. So just write thank you letters, and then the grace and action in that prompt is I want you to also write a thank you letter to yourself. Take your time and really dig in and talk to yourself. I know that may sound crazy to some people talking to yourself, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, but like take the time and look over your life and look over your current situation and look over where you want to go, your dreams, and the things that you are currently doing to get there, the things that you've overcame and whatever you need, but thank yourself because you know, you here, we here, baby.

SPEAKER_00 10:34

We is a here, and that deserves a thank you because yeah, ain't nobody got me like I got me, okay, except God, and he probably got me better than I got myself.

SPEAKER_02 10:48

Hello, just saying, but yeah, so the grace here is to also write a thank you letter to yourself, don't leave yourself out in that. So, yes, so our journal prompt, write thank you letters to all the people about all the things that you are just grateful and thankful for, and in that, the grace and action in that prompt is to also remember to thank yourself and be thankful and realize you've overcame way more than you probably can see. You know, hindsight is 2020. So then now that we are all glowing, growing and going, let's go ahead and see who we are in step with today. So, for this week's shared steps, I want to take the time to give flowers to Dr. Lakeisha Key Hallman. If you've ever heard the phrase it takes a village, then you've already been introduced to the heart of her life's work. As the founder of the Village Market, Dr. Hallman has dedicated her career to creating spaces where entrepreneurs, authors, creatives, and dreamers don't have to build alone. She has intentionally built community by connecting people with resources, opportunities, and one another. Her work has continued to grow, including the opening of a village market location at Atlanta's airport, creating even more opportunities to celebrate and support black-owned businesses. She also reminds us through her book, No One is Self-Made, that none of us get where we're going completely on our own. Behind every accomplishment is someone who encouraged us, challenged us, opened a door, offered wisdom, prayed for us, or simply reminded us to just not give up. And I think that's something worth remembering. Sometimes our village looks like family. Sometimes it's lifelong friends, sometimes it's teachers, mentors, coworkers, or even complete strangers who say exactly what we need to hear at the exact right moment. No matter what your village looks like, don't overlook the people who have helped carry you through one season so you can make it to the next. So this week we are giving flowers to Dr. Lakeisha Key Hallman for minding us that community isn't just something we receive, it's something we help build. And when we have the opportunity, may we all choose to be a part of someone else's village. So thank you, Dr. Lakeisha Hallman. So now that we are all in step on today, let's go ahead and set the mood with some tools. So for this week's Her Playlist, the playlist that is guiding our conversation on today, it is just one simple song, and I think this song encompasses and says it all. I think this one song says it all. We all need somebody to lean on. I have a problem and you understand we all need somebody to lean on. Lean on me. Yeah. I don't know why. That song is just such a but yes, that song is it encapsulates, yeah. I think that's the right word. The whole idea of, you know, it really generally takes a village. And you know, you might need help, you might need to lean on somebody, somebody might need to lean on you, and just the importance of community and just being there. And yeah, that's part of this conversation. So that's why that is the song, and it is the only song, because it's the only song that I could just really, you know, yeah, put in that I felt really truly touches on because it's yeah, as we get in the conversation, I think it'll make it, it'll make sense in itself on its own time. But yeah, so that's the song for the week. So cool, lean on me, Bill Withers. So now that the mood is set, let's go ahead and walk through this thing, y'all. Okay, so like now I keep talking about, you know, it takes a village, village community, da-da-da-da-da-da, those things. And I know we have all heard the common saying that it takes a village, and you know, honestly, I used to think that it meant people who would never leave your side throughout life, that was your village, and that was who it was always going to be, and things like that of that nature, and that's part of it, kinda sorta, but not fully it. Okay, so like just walk with me through this, okay? Like, you know, like I was saying earlier a little bit, and what I've touched on in a few of like later episodes, earlier past episodes, the world can make you feel alone, it can make you feel small, it can make you just it can cloud your judgment, it can cloud your vision from you know life and things that have happened in your favor, and yada yada yada on so forth. Because, like, you know, I understand that there's nights where you are alone and you're crying, and there's no one there to wipe your tears, nobody there to hold you and rock you and help you, and you you I've had I've definitely had moments like these are moments that I've had too. I've been alone crying, tears, never ending, pillows sopping wet, asking God why, praying to God, why, praying to God, asking where he's at, what's going on, just feeling so lost and just alone in the sauce. And I know how I know when it feels like, I know what it looks like to like for me, it can feel like it has looked like that I'm carrying the entire weight of the world on my shoulders all by myself, on my lonesome, and I gotta figure it all out by myself, on my lonesome, and there's nobody there that understands, nobody sees me, and all of those things. I understand. Been there, been there, honey, been there, been there, been there. Okay, and I'm not saying that those moments are real because I know they are, I know for a fact they are. And I at one point in my life, I thought I didn't have a village anymore. Like, I I don't know if you guys recall from other episodes, past episodes, when I talked about you know losing friends and not having any friendships and things like that, and how it hardened my heart and it made it hard for me to connect with other people. It made me hard to it made it hard for me to want to connect and to be present and genuinely be a part of a community, be a part of a village again, and have people in my village and things like that. And looking back on it, part of what helped me heal, yes, I forgave them, and yes, I took accountability, and yes, I there's some things I did wrong, some things they did wrong, some things we don't both did wrong, and all the things in between and all of that. But to make a long story short, part of the healing, yes, like I said, yes, I did forgive them and all the things, but also looking back on it and truly taking the time to reflect and see they were my village too. Um, I just had to take the time to shift my perspective and understand that they were my village for that season, you know, because we had laughs, we had inside jokes, they were my shoulders to cry on. They were the ones that made me take the time to face the mirror and look in, and they they did keep me from doing some stupid things. They also did some stupid things with me. Um I did learn from them. We learned from each other, we grew together, we've changed together, we had like it was so many moments and so many memories and so many times and things that happened in that span of all those different relationships and friendships that even though they're not presently here and active in my life now, the season that they were, they were my village, they were my people. They, you know, they they were. And my village has just now changed, you know. I have my friend Bird and her folks, and like if when I'm talking about most of the things that I'm doing when I'm going out and stuff like that, it's with her, it's her and her folks, and we there. We there, we there, we be outside having a vibe with the family, with the family, okay. And then I have my siblings who are my best friends, like they have literally, I don't know what it is about when you get grown and you just you know go off and do your own thing. That for me, at least, my story, my experience, my siblings have become my besties. We literally talk about nearly everything, okay. I love them, and just the endless support and love of my parents and understanding how they love and why they are the way they are, just having that and being able to see that and be appreciated, appreciated, appreciative of that, you know. So, like I said, my village has changed, the faces changed, but the love didn't. And you know, even beyond family and friends, sometimes your village is also strangers. Some people may only be a part of your story for five minutes, but those five minutes can change everything. You know, I had a moment when I was at, I had took myself out to eat, I had made it a point to take myself out to eat every Friday, and I love seafood. So I took myself to the seafood restaurant, and I got this new waiter at this time when I did, and he, I don't know what he saw in me. I don't know if I was just wearing my emotions on my sleeve, on my face, whatever. But I was going through, you know, relationship troubles, yada yada yada. And he sat there and he sat down and he talked to me about God. And we had a real nice moment about my relationship with God, and it was such a genuine and sincere. Conversation that uh that left an impact it imprinted on me and things like that. And even when I went to Nashville with Cameron, I got to go to church with her and I visited her church and random man in the pews sitting beside us. He wasn't even he was like to the left of us, so he couldn't even see me. He saw me once we were leaving. And I don't, once again, don't know what he saw. Don't like because I didn't say anything. I had a smile on my face and all the things, but he he was he just touched my shoulder and he was just like, It's gonna be okay. Just hold on for a little while longer. Man don't know me from Canada. I don't know that man. I'd be um, but he said it, and that he said it was perfect, it was something that I genuinely didn't need, didn't know I needed to hear it, but when he said it, it was something that touched something inside of me. It had an impact, it left an imprint. Even when I went to the Poor Minds Live show, and I told you guys I got to do the um meet and greet picture thing with them. I had a brief, like I literally quickly told Lex and Jay, I have a podcast, yada yada, yada. And Lex, with all seriousness, looked me dead in my eyes, and I could feel how real and genuine she was like she meant. And she just was like, don't stop. Whatever you do, don't stop, don't give up, keep going. And something like it touched something in me, it had an impact, no longer than three, five minutes, maybe. That it and even just saying those words, 30 seconds at most. Okay, but it left the impact an imprint on me, it touched something deep within my soul, and I just I feel like those are village moments, and you know, it's those village moments are when it could be any person, someone encouraging you, someone takes the time and they actually see you, and or someone who wants to pray for you genuinely, sincerely, sincerely, because you don't need to be everybody don't need to be praying for you because everybody does not wish you well, but a sincere prayer, you know, just simple reminders to not quit, to not give up on yourself, to like to see you, and truly taking the time to look back, also show me I was never alone in all of the seasons and all of my changes and all my growth and all of the things that have happened in all the different phases of my life. I've always had people around me in my village, my teachers, my mentors, my parents, my siblings, different friends, strangers. Like I said, my village has changed over the years, my needs have changed, but I've never actually been alone. So I just want to say that if you are in a season where you feel alone, don't only look forward, sometimes you should take the time to look back. You know, ask yourself genuinely who's been rooting for you? Who has believed in me? Who has spoken life into me? Who has poured into my cup? Even if it only lasted a minute. Okay, okay. Well, now we have reached the point in the episode where I would like to hear your stories, your voices. And honestly, if you like to share a thank you letter and you want me to read it out loud here, I will. Okay, you can email those letters into lettersalongtheway at gmail.com. That is L-E-T-T-E-R-S-A-L-O-N-G-H-E-W-A-Y at Gmail.com. So now we have reached the point in the episode where I leave you with a grace note. And so for this week, I just simply want to say not everyone in your village is meant to stay forever. Some people are simply there long enough to help you make it to the next part of your journey, whether that's family, friends, or even strangers. Alright, and now we have reached the end of our episode. I have been reminded that I stopped telling you guys how to get in contact with me. I am I actually I was reminded, I was told that I never gave a contact email, and then that I completely forgot to tell you guys to follow me on social media. Like, oh my goodness, I can't believe I did that. But yes, if you if you would like to get in contact with me um with the podcast and things of that nature, you can always send an email to herpathherpace at gmail.com. That is herpathherpace at gmail.com. And don't forget to follow the podcast on socials at herpathherpace. And you can also follow, you know, me, the lovely host at Roche on social platforms as well. And if you like what we got going on over here, if I said something that touched you, inspired you, reminded you of anything, or you know, just simply having just to have grace and whatever's going on in life and the reminder that you're never alone. Just don't forget to like, comment, share, subscribe, turn on those post bell notifications so you are notified every time a new episode drops. Okay, once again, thank you guys so much for joining me and taking this time to walk through this conversation together. I just want to simply remind you to pause, breathe, take a peek, and remember, guys, to give yourself some grace. Until next week, bye.