Chilling with Bo
Podcast for young men creating the life they want. We talk culture, lifestyle, dating, and the hustle.
Chilling with Bo
Jungwoo navigating America and coming of age
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Check out Jungwoo's journey as a man navigating life in America
So welcome to another episode. Today we have Jong Wu Kim. He's one of my best friends, my brother, and my mentor as well. So I'm very excited for this.
SPEAKER_01Welcome to another episode of Chillin with Bo. And I'm your host, Bo. In this podcast, all we talk about is chill kind of conversation, you know, and how to be the best you. Come chill with me, man. What y'all doing, huh? Chillin' with Bo! You know, just hear cool stories and just chill. You know the type of conversation you have while you're chillin' with your homies. But you get to just witness that, witness that, witness that, witness that, witness that.
SPEAKER_02Before further ado, let me introduce Jong Wu. So this is written by Jung Wu, and I thought this was very funny. He said Jung Wu is a middle-aged guy with suspicion suspiciously good sense of humor for someone who stumbled through life as much as he has. Let's see if that's true within this episode. He somehow made it from the south side of Korea to the US when he didn't know about a thing or anything at all, except maybe how to survive by pure luck and questionable decisions. Alright, Jungle, so reading your bio, tell us a little bit about yourself. Like how do you came from south side Korea here and maybe give us some of your questionable decisions and adventures that inform you on how to survive?
SPEAKER_00Well, I came here when I was 15 years old. I mean, no, 14 years old. Um, South Korea. But the reason why I put it south side, you know, I'm trying to share the story of Korea still. Um some people say, oh, it's from North Korea or South Korea, but you know, I see it as uh still one Korea. Uh one day I really wanted to visit uh north side of Korea.
SPEAKER_03Oh wow.
SPEAKER_00Um when I if I can. But anyway, that's why I said that. Um to America when I was 14 years old. Um because my mother uh wanted me to have a better life, I would say, you know, better opportunity education. When I first came, it was 1999. Um I went to Buenaporte High School. Late 90s, Buenaperque was pretty rough. Yeah, not many Asians. I think I own I was one of the like few Asians um Korean in in my school, but right now Buenaperma has like a lot of Asians, you know, Korean Americans live in Buenapercies. But during those times, not many, you know. So predominantly Latin A and also some black, very little w white and Asian. So during the time um there's a um I think a m a gangsta a gang uh named MS13 who had uh turf where my school is. So the kids from Korea I don't know anything about those, right?
SPEAKER_03Right, right.
SPEAKER_00I don't speak the language, know the culture, nothing. Anyway they thought I was like uh because they you don't they th I think they have missed the conception of all the Asians are rich.
SPEAKER_03Right, right, right, right.
SPEAKER_00Right. So uh oh I think of the student pick on me. He must be rich, you know. Because like you know, there's like the kids I remember they're Mexican kids. Maybe they're from from different countries. But anyway, they say they're they're gang member shave their head, you know. Cocky shaki shorts, quartz shoes, you know.
SPEAKER_02They go club.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, pro club the white t-shirt. They uh try to rob me, I guess. It's class, you know? P class, you know, I was like taking on my shirt, try to change my clothes. I was like, I feel something here, something cold in my right chest. I put it down and look, it was a knife, right? And then all the gang members like surrounded me. So they said, uh, ask me if I have money. I said, I don't have money. They couldn't believe it. So they they tried to look at my wallet, but I didn't have anything. I was one of the poor kids. Two as well. So And I think it happened on like all one more time, you know. One time happened at also at the class. They pulled a gun out of, you know, his his bag and then just like pointed at me and like, hey, you give me whatever whatever you have. And I said, I don't have it. In class. In class. It was pretty pretty rough. And then now like as I learn more like month year, it's like okay. I kind of learned the culture a little bit. Right, right. The hustle culture, and it's how they work.
SPEAKER_03Right, right, right.
SPEAKER_00Where they're uh where they live and things like this. So you know, I used to love hip-hop music, rep music a lot. Um and also I used to like beatbox, you know?
SPEAKER_02Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00So and that's how black commun black folks really found out me.
SPEAKER_03Right, right, right, right.
SPEAKER_00And they said uh they wanted to hang out with me, right?
SPEAKER_03Right, right.
SPEAKER_00So they started to call me JK because my name is Jong Wu Kim. Uh-huh. JK, J Jong Wukim is too long, you know. Right, right, right. Let's let's let's cut it half. You know, they started to call me JK. So anyway, um they started to uh bang me up, you know? Yeah. So, and they told all the gang members, you know, that you don't, you don't you don't fuck with them anymore, you know. Don't fuck with them, you know. If you fuck with them, you'll fuck with me.
SPEAKER_03Right, right, right, right.
SPEAKER_00So that's how I got uh um I got I would say I found my community.
SPEAKER_02You got initiated.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, yeah. So and then in between I I had to fought a lot, you know. It's like I couldn't get on the bus anymore, you know. Uh you know, school bus because they because they put me on the blacklist. Right.
SPEAKER_02So anyway, I went through a lot of uh blacklist on with the school or with the gang? Oh with the school.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, if you put a lot. Yeah, yeah. And yeah, so um that's starting rough time. I think also that's why I put my bio is like I made a lot of stupid decisions too.
SPEAKER_02And that was like your early that was like your introduction to America coming here.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, exactly. You know, not even knowing the language and before I came and I thought America is like full of Disneyland, you know? Yeah. Full of like a limousine. And I remember I saw Limousine and the movie, and I thought that was my life would be, you know? Yeah if I go to America. But it was exactly more worse than the life I had in Korea in the beginning. Just like surviving. And also, as an immigrant kid, like I was poor, so I had to work. So even though in school I have to find a job. You know, like I remember I went to one uh Bernapongmo, there's a food core. They hire you, right? It can't work today. So I told them I'm over 16 because they said under 16 is illegal.
SPEAKER_03Right, right, right.
SPEAKER_00But I was fifteen. But I lied my age, you know, because I need a job, so I I became a dishwasher, you know? So I washing dish, you know. Yeah, so that was also rough time. So whenever I go to school, I was so tired, you know? So I always like uh sleeping at class. So I hadn't and the teacher uh one day called cop and school cop and he pulled me out, uh he called me to his like private office or something. And he he checked my pu-pee, you know, eyes, make sure I I'm not on drug or something. So I told him, Why you I you know, he said the I got complained by a teacher, you're always sleeping. Are you on drug or I said, I know, I'm just tired, you know, I w I work a lot, you know. And I don't think they he understood, you know, because I think yeah, he couldn't believe that because I was fifteen years old. What was what do you mean you you work a lot, you know? But anyway, that's that was my I think high school time.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02It's pretty crazy. Yes, uh um But but funny enough, I think it is pretty crazy, but it's also not as uncommon as we would think it would be. Would you say so?
SPEAKER_00Yes, exactly.
SPEAKER_02A lot of life is like that.
SPEAKER_00Yes, yes. Uh especially like um a child of immigrant, yes. Right, yes, because like they you see you but I came here without my parents, so but I know how um how uh hard my parents, like my mom worked um in Korea to make sure um I mean we didn't really enough m much money for uh uh I mean sh to survive here unless I work. Right, right. But still she worked really hard because we she has three kids, you know. I have two older sisters, so that's gonna be a lot, you know? So that's the I think that's how most of the first gen uh immigrant kids also picked up from their parents, I guess. Right.
SPEAKER_02Seeing how hard they work and just like, okay, this is what they gotta do to just even survive.
SPEAKER_00Yes.
SPEAKER_02Cause I, yeah, because I mean I worked too through in high school. Maybe not as much, but I work compared to kids, right? So it's just like you gotta come home, go to work, wake up, go to school. I didn't deal with gangs or stuff like that, but I got picked on, but it was also a different life, right? Where I watched TV, it's just Disney Channel, a lot of white kids, right? White and black, right? And then you come here and it's like mainly Mexican and black, you know, no Asian too, but the school I went to, and it was like a similar story, you know, got picked on, need to just kind of just like fight for fan for myself, and then just, you know, stay, stay kind of, yeah, just yeah. So how was that? Um tell me more about so you say you came here without your parents. So who did you live with? Um, yeah.
SPEAKER_00I live with my first, my aunt. I have an aunt here not too long. Less than a year or something. I don't think she liked me to stay there. I have to stay there because I made a lot of trouble, like I share. I wasn't in trouble. It's because I didn't want it. I think I could try to survive and get through uh life, you know.
SPEAKER_02You were just fending for yourself and working.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's that's why I like to defend myself. But I yes, because I don't think they understood, you know, what I was going through. But anyway, basically we got kicked out. We found like um apartment um for ourselves and leave there a little bit, but And you were only like 15, 16, and 10 years. Yeah, because I had two sisters, they're older sisters, but uh they're still young too, younger than 18, you know. So um remember we we couldn't pay, you know, the bill. So I went to the church. It's not because I'm a religious. I was a religious because you know the church keeps you food, you know?
SPEAKER_03Right, right.
SPEAKER_00I don't know the other church, but Korean church, man, they have really good food. And also uh they also give free rice. So I went there to pick up the rice. Uh-uh. Um so uh we can cook home at home. And yeah, and it's a consistent struggle, I guess. Um and also I knew that in New York, if you, you know, if you go to New York, it's like you don't need a transp uh, like you don't have to drive, you don't have to have a car. That's perfect transportation pretty good.
SPEAKER_03Right, right, right.
SPEAKER_00Um, so okay, maybe I should go to New York, because it'd be much much easier for me to leave.
SPEAKER_03Right.
SPEAKER_00Cheaper as well. I went there, lived there almost two years.
SPEAKER_02How old were you at this time?
SPEAKER_00I think about 20.
SPEAKER_02Oh, okay, okay.
SPEAKER_0021, something like that. So you got kicked out after high school.
SPEAKER_02Okay, so you got kicked out like 15, 16, you just kinda got an apartment with your sister, work. Yeah, and then at one point you're like, okay, I'm gonna go to New York.
SPEAKER_00I went to New York because it's much easier for me to leave. Um, and but it wasn't.
SPEAKER_04Right.
SPEAKER_00Much expensive, you know, much harder to navigate those lives in a new setting. So anyway, that's the how I struggled through. Um and uh eventually I decided to go back to college, going decided to go to college. So at 24, I moved back to California and then applied for I went to college. Right. And then I graduated 28. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Tell me a little bit about New York.
SPEAKER_00New York, okay. I can share some funny stories. Okay, I live in okay, so I was a poor kid, right? So one day I found like housing, you know?
SPEAKER_04Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00Like, like during the day, back in the day, the crack list is one of the most famous websites that you can find. Affordable housing, I'll say. Yeah. So one day I found, uh like, I mean, it's too good to be true, price. $500 in Manhattan, uptown, 92nd, 96th, and first, or something like that. So I was like, what? And anyway, it's like I just called them and then she picked up. She said, okay, well, I like to take a look. Say, no, you can't take a look. You just pay or you get it or not. I was like, okay, sure. 500 bucks, man. F town. I was like, okay, yeah, I get it. And I found out um I moved in, right? I found out it was uh one of the projects. So remember in the hallway, there's a lot of uh homeless sleeping, and after 10 p.m. they cut the cut off the electric. Um so all the lights and also elevators stopped. So, I mean, there's a true story. Sometimes the people stuck in the elevator because like the when the during the while was moving, it stopped. So they knocked. I also one time I got stuck. I knocked it, and some people like, you know, you can just open it by hand and manually actually. And then sometimes the elevator is stuck stuck between the floor, right? And then only you have like this amount of free space you can you have to crawl out, basically. I did a couple times. So people in no no live in this, uh not visitors, no, like who live there, they don't take elevator 950 or something, you know? It's just okay, this is not the right time. So anyway, people who are visiting or no delivering pizza guy, whatever, they're just stuck there. Sometimes they come up and you think I stuck in the 24th floor, because which I think that's where I live.
SPEAKER_03Oh no.
SPEAKER_00I go out, or people go out and then just save them, you know. It's like it's a kind of community, you know. Okay, so you always have community. Yeah, no one had a problem. It's just uh I've been seeing nobody got stuck there, or just uh for a few hours, you know, more than an hour, it just bang, bang on, and then somebody always, you know, leaving their floor, save them. They opened the hey, come out. That's how you should anyway. That was this. And then also each floor, because after 10 p.m. is electric out, right? So so dark, so you gotta walk up because I live in the 24th floor. Right. I walk up, but each each floor, like some people, you know, maybe in leave in the building or not, uh, I'm not sure, but they um they sleep there.
SPEAKER_02Oh wow, they just sleep in the elevator.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, because no, not the elevator, in the floor. Oh, no, the stairs, staircase. Because I think they're in drug, I guess. I think that the drug was one of the huge problems in the building where I live. Right. And also uh setting the drug, things like this. So anyway, but first few months I was so scared, but after that, I they're all my friend now, right? So, you know, and then one day I I brought my brother-in-law, right? My friend, he got so scared, you know? And then it seems like because it's so dark, I have to use my cell phone, you know, the light. Back in the day, flea phone, you know, so really um it's not colorful, it's a black screen, so you know it's not really bright. But anyway, um it's good enough, you know. It's bright enough you can see um who's in there. So anyway, um we use this. And one day, um I the room, there's a three-room in my apartment. Um actually, I'd use one room and two other rooms. I don't know who lived there, but um and one day I was sleeping in Sunday, I remember it's like uh sleeping uh in the morning, and somebody bang my room, bum, and opened the room, right? Kicked. The woman said, put your put your fucking hands in the air. And I was like, what what's going on? And look turned around and it's like NIPD. Oh a bunch of the guy like componenting me and something. It's like, get up, get out of the floor, motherfucker. And then I just put my hand there, you know, I was like, what's going on? And then he tried, they tried to like handcuff me. Okay, I just follow, and then he turned, he turned my face, right? And then, nah, he's Asian, he's not. This is it, this is not, this is not the guy, it's not it's not it. Yeah, and he moved to the next one and bOOM! Right, they're looking for his drug a drug dealer, whatever. I was saying, because I was the only Asian living in the building, and all the people living there, like um under the black were Latina people. So uh I think they knew that uh they were I was not the one they're looking for. So being Asian, you know, I I thought I was grateful for being an Asian for that time. Yeah. So yes, because I remember they said that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, no, that's real. So it's like I I have similar experience sometimes, but like you've always been like the only Asian person in a lot of spaces. How did that kind of shape your life? You would say, you know, it definitely gets you away from a lot of problems, and it also gets you kind of you know cultured and incorporated too. Because even like when I first came here, there were kids doing drugs, they were like, you know, robbing tool, spray painting, and one time I get caught up with all of them, and the same thing, the principal came in, he's just like, Oh, let him go. And then they kept everybody else because I was like the only Asian kid there, too. Yes, so it does definitely like you know, like I would say benefit and then misunderstand, but it's also like they also think you have money, that's why they tried to rob you, but probably yes, so that's yeah, you gave me two examples, but like if you want to just share more about how has that dynamic been, you know?
SPEAKER_00Well, I would say nowadays being Asian is that you have uh a lot of advantage, I would say.
SPEAKER_04Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_00Yes, especially as a Korean person, really huge advantage because of the K-pop, K drama, you know, all this um the cultural thing the Korean people share throughout the world, right? But when I first came, 90, late nineties, early 20s, 2000, some people they don't even know where the Korea was, you know. Right, right. Yeah, so I don't was on the struggle and and also one of the struggle I had is also like as uh Asian man you know they sometimes just see me as just a funny person you know like not the funny person what's the right word like I have to be they don't see me serious here sometimes right right yeah yeah they see me as like uh because they see um there's a lot of character right in the American movie they portrayed as like some funny right person you know humorous I mean also I mean they know Bruce Lee and Jackie Chang whatever but right right you know there's a lot of that's only two characters yeah yeah preconceived notion of Asians sh should be like this you know should be that I think that was more struggle but now I feel really grateful. Right yeah um that um I don't know if there was necessarily hard time but I went through that struggle you know and and I learned how to navigate those by not just taking in you know as a just offensive thingy you know because one thing I appreciate about um Netflix or YouTube is kind of change people's perspective because they can watch they can hear watch see how other really uh live you know yeah so that's really a power in media and representation exactly they before they only see it Asian is like they watch couple movies that's and then they see it oh you are the ah you know like right right just this but it was not you know and then yeah because because even in my experience right I think we have a similar experience where you came when you were 14 I came when I was 13.
SPEAKER_02So I feel like we was old enough where we have a lot of like we have already like a understanding of what it means to be Asian in Asia. You know what I mean? So I feel like when I came here I also experienced that where people are just kind of like all right they might try to make fun of me or they're just like oh you're Chinese you're Korean you know and I'm from Thailand. People don't know Thailand and I came you know we have an age gap so I also see that transition right and I don't know how how that made you react but for me it made me felt some type of way because I think even Asian American here at times when I first came here they also made fun of Asian people. So I I felt like I needed to feel like I needed to act tough and really like fight a lot of people and kind of prove my point because I I just find a lot of it as disrespect but I also like learn to know that sometimes it's ignorance and it's not you know so if you want to you know has that been your experience at all or you just kind of like you just kind of like navigated because you you had a a very rough situation already so you're more like just surviving.
SPEAKER_00Not sure um yeah I mean sometimes some cases like this I have to fight through it you know for example like I share you know when I was in school they thought I was rich you know so they try to rob me all the time so I have to put my guard up and then fight back however I can right uh but that was not sustainable and that was very risky too like I share made so much so many dumb decisions yeah so and now I look back now like it it was not their fault either. Right because now I learn more of America about their culture about their history it's like a lot of things came coming from actually how this country was started you know started by I would say like Western you know who left England you know and stole this land from someone else like native Indians you know and bring brought Chinese and black and as you know they use them as like free labor you know um and even Latinate people now right right right and as and they try to like also create using a race as divide you know um our community.
SPEAKER_03Right.
SPEAKER_00And I back then I didn't know anything about it right so basically try to a lot of things like create a condition that we had to repeat it against each other right um instead of appeal together. So that's something even a lot of policy in the US is kind of I see that a lot of a lot of things um create that that kind of culture. Right. Right um like for example um when I used to live in like Chicago oh man there's segregation is huge in the front north and south right south side north side and even like block by block and and also um the one thing I really shocked you know got shocked when I was in high school here is like in Korea if your child skips school your teacher come visit make sure that visit your house home make sure that you're okay so it's very for first it's very difficult for you to skip school and second is you feel care. You know what I'm saying? I mean first like in appearance you know like surface level uh you don't really like being nagged by teacher but in deep inside you know oh man you know somebody's still care about you right yeah if you're if you are missing if you're something happened to me somebody will come right right you know you still want to be care feel careful. Yeah yeah like you know what I'm saying so but in here I used to still teach a lot skip to school up no one cares nobody really they don't really they don't call you they just need the paper signed by your guardian whatever right so I easily fake it you know right right right and your teacher don't know even your name sometimes right right yeah I mean it's at the surface so I really liked it because I could just skip school whatever I want but deep inside I knew I was very lonely I was very scared you know very not I would say like not uh not um loved you know so I think there was something um that I learned from American culture and then it's still impacting a lot of people and even among our community yeah now that you brought that up you're right because I felt I feel like when I first came here I felt very free in a way that I could do whatever I want to do because there was no not much social repercussion.
SPEAKER_02You know there was not that sense of like because like when I was growing up in Thailand even when I left class right it's like I would walk out of class with other students. Here it's like everybody kind of for themselves you go even like small things like you tie your shoelace people just keep walking right like there's no waiting no nothing right even people being on drugs you did it just let them be right there was no like hey stop or like you know how they said like the village raised a kid like there's no concern of other parents other family and I think me and you two like coming here right like immigrant parents wasn't here everybody working extended family you just felt like you can do whatever disappear doesn't need to yeah and then it it it created an isolation and it I think and then combined with the divisiveness of like community it became like you against the world you know because even for me it's like oh okay the Mexican people didn't fuck with me the black people didn't fuck with me even Asian American didn't fuck with me you know so it's just like okay I'm by myself I'm just gonna work you know do my little push-ups and then go play basketball and trying to prove myself to the world and it was a very like lonely and uh a lot of like um like anger and hatred inside right and then and then suffering with like damn why do I need to work like why can't go home play games like other people and I think it made me very uh yeah just form a lot of unhealthy habits you know right I mean you brought a really good point which is social repercussion yeah I think this is a really good point and here they so much focus on academic repercussion or economic repercussions it's like very deeply rooted in capitalistic mindset which is um I think sometimes the root cause of all things you know right sometimes they don't care about how other people feel like because if I do this I get again right um some kind of economic or financial return or academic return you know yeah but in in Korea when it's like nah the social repercussions way way bigger than sometimes um your academic repercussion it's like if you don't show up you know you don't want to be humiliated you know you don't want to feel like you're um because of you're not going to school you're not sure what whatever you don't want your teachers to worry about you you know you don't want your peers to worry about you because you have that kind of pressure right right and she's good pressure I would say right you know because the world's bigger than just you yeah yeah exactly you all right man thank you oh boom boom boom