Sobriety | Part 2

Proverbs 20:10 | Part 2 | Drinking. It's mentioned in the Bible over 200 times so it's clear that God has something to say about it. What does He want for us to do with alcohol, no matter our opinions? The answer might surpise you. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:05

If you don't have anyone in your life that you trust to really call you out, you don't have anyone in your life who just never really gets in your business? I would say you don't have the support system to approach drinking.

SPEAKER_01 0:19

Welcome to the bridge with Junior Ziggler. Junior's the lead teaching pastor at the Bridge at Chicagoland. And if you joined us last time, you know we've been talking about sobriety and what Proverbs has to say about alcohol. And today, Junior's gonna take this conversation a step further. Because the question isn't simply, am I drunk? It's possible to stay technically sober and still become overly attached to something. And not just alcohol. There's many things that try to enslave us. Things that we're constantly thinking about, planning around, needing it to relax, maybe even feeling like you can't fully enjoy life without it. And that's where Solomon's wisdom is going to become incredibly relevant. Throughout Proverbs, wisdom isn't just about avoiding disaster, it's actually about setting your life up for maximum potential and godly freedom. It's about refusing to let anything other than God take the driver's seat in your life. One of the things I appreciate about today's message is that Junior challenges us to look beyond what's permissible and ask a deeper question. Am I truly free? As you listen today, I want to encourage you not to think merely about alcohol, but about anything that may be competing for control of your heart, your attention, your affections. Wherever you're joining us from. Thanks for listening. Now here's Junior.

SPEAKER_02 1:39

So I went to a very, very strict Christian school growing up. I mean, it was it was close to like Mennonite Amish. Strict. And uh as a kid, we'd have chapel, and there'd always be these like really old um preachers that would come in. I don't know why they're really old. Maybe it's just so you're a kid, you think everybody's old, but like these ancient guys would come in and um they were like hellfire brimstone preachers. They'd like get in your face and scream a lot. And and I remember one old guy um read this verse, and he said, See, it's even a sin to look at it. Not only can you not have a drop, you can't even look at it. And I remember being a kid sitting there just thinking, like, I wish I could see it in the grocery store. Like, what do you do in the grocery store? Like, dude walks by with a six-pack, you know, he just like covers his eyes, you know, like he's like walking by a strip club or something. Like, that's not what this verse is saying. Jesus was around alcohol. Not only, again, he did yes, he did change water to wine, but also his critics called Jesus a drunk. Now, he never got drunk because that's a sin, but to get that criticism, you'd have to at least be around it. Jesus told parables of a wine press. So he's at least familiar with wine presses. He didn't cover his eyes when he was traveling and he walked by a wine press. So, again, what do we do with this verse then? Well, the Hebrew word for look doesn't mean to glance or notice. The word for look here that Solomon uses is this image of like locking on. Nicole and I celebrated uh 15 years this summer. 15 years ago, she walked down the aisle. Yeah, I was locked on. I was like, man, that's my girl. I wasn't looking at anybody else in the room or what was going on. Like I was locked in, just like her hair, her dress. I remember the way she looked at me. And as I took her, like her dad gave her to me. I just I remember how she smelled, her smile. Like I had tunnel visions, just all about her. And I'm still, I'm not trying to be like this weird romantic. I'm still locked on. I took her on a date on Tuesday. I dropped the kids off for like, you know, and I went to go pick her up from the house. It was like almost like we were dating again, you know, picking her up from the house. And she came out of like, man, I was like, I still had those legitimately those same feelings of when I saw her walk down the aisle, like, ah, that's my girl. And I'm not trying to be mushy, I'm just kind of like wired that way. I can be a little bit obsessively focused, which is a good thing and a bad thing. I just lock onto things. This summer, my mother-in-law, she asked me to pressure wash her deck. It looks so nice afterwards. I've been pressure washering everything since. Pressure washed our camper, pressure washed the sidewalk, pressure wash the garage. Nicole's told me, she's like, you got to stop pressure washing stuff. It's like, but anytime I see something dirty outside, I'm like, oh, I should pressure wash that thing. It's like I'm locked, I just want to pressure wash everything. This is the picture that Solomon is painting here. That is so easy to get locked on to stuff. And that can be a good thing, but it's also very easy, and some of us are this way, we just don't want to admit it, we get locked on with alcohol. You find yourself looking forward to the next time, you can sit down, throwing back. In fact, you kind of struggle to relax without it. That's what we call addiction. That's being locked on. Remember in high school when um on Monday your friends would like talk about the parties on Friday night, you know, kids like get together and laugh about how much they had. Like, and some adults still do this, and I don't get it. It's like Jerry was double fisting solo cups, you know, or this weekend I overdid an Aunt Susie and I at the wedding. She kept buying me shots. Like, imagine replacing alcohol with stories of soda. You see, Jerry, he was double fisting two cups of Pepsi. Like, what is wrong with you, dude? You know, this weekend was rough. Me and Aunt Susie, we had too much money to do, we got a sugar rush. It's like, you think, like, grow up, like that is so childish. What's wrong with you? But for some reason, it's almost like more socially acceptable to do that with alcohol. But Solomon says, Stop, stop, grow up, don't lock on. If you find yourself struggling to engage in gatherings of people without it, that's a symptom of being locked on. And in this, Solomon is giving us our second framework here. Yes, stay sober for sure. But beyond that, stay classy. And I know you laugh because it seems so hypocritical coming from me. I did a wedding in Boston last weekend, and it was uh it fell like this really fancy manner, like estate or whatever. And uh one of my best friends was getting married, so show up at the property and it's like security because it's classy. And I needed to like get to the bride and the groom to pray to pray with them, kind of talk about the ceremony, and tried getting in, and they tried to kick me out. Like, you need to leave, sir. They thought I was wedding crashing. And I said, I was like, I'm the master of ceremonies. I'm pretty sure I can kick you out. They didn't believe it. But um, before you grab your top hat and monocle, let me just define what classy means. Classy is a high standard of behavior and conversation, which is exactly what Proverbs is calling us to. Don't get so sucked into the idea of alcohol that your desires and your conversations they orbit the idea of drinking. That as image bearers of God, we're classier than that. Our approach to sobriety must be noticeably different than the world. Is your approach to alcohol different than your neighbors? Or the way you talk about it pretty similar? Are your standards of sobriety visibly high and healthy? Or here's a good question: would anyone look at you and admire your approach to substances? I mean, I go as far as to say that unless you can model, be a model of sobriety with healthy boundaries, we really don't have a business approaching it. In Matthew chapter 12, Jesus said that we will give an account for every careless word that we speak. Do our words encourage a healthy approach to alcohol? Or could our joking and our comments and our winking at it give others an excuse to become inebriated? See, I believe it takes a very strong person to have a drink and not go too far. I also believe that it takes a very strong person to know to just stay away from it. But either way, we're called to be that strong person. How are we doing on all this? Like we're okay. I mean, you're still here, so that's a good sign. Uh let's hit another verse. Proverbs 23, verse 29 says, Who has anguish, who has sorrow, who is always fighting, who is always complaining, who has unnecessary bruises, who has bloodshot eyes. Look at this verse 30. It's it's one who spends long hours in taverns trying out new drinks. Some translations say one who chases drink. You know anyone like that? Or maybe you've been that way before? See, Solomon has such a gift of painting these images with words, which is what he's doing here. He's he's painting someone who is driven by the next time they can just kind of sit down, let loose, and drink. Um, which to some degree, let's just be fair, to some degree, that's a bit natural. Like you're always looking forward to that next time you can get together with friends and chill out, take a break from work, all that is fine. But verse 29 is different. This is different. This is someone whose desire isn't driven to just chill out and be with some friends. This is someone whose desire is to, I want to be clouded. I want to be buzzed, I want to be affected under the control the next time I can just kind of pop one open and let loose. See, here's the thing: it is possible to stay sober and stay classy, but still have your mind set on the next time you can enjoy a drink. And then this psalm is giving us point number three for a biblical framework, and that is stay free. Stay sober, stay classy, don't get locked on, stay free. Now, here's the thing this is gonna sound extreme, and and I don't mean it to, but at the same time, I do feel a responsibility that I need to share this. Let's put sobriety and drinking in general in perspective. From the highest of heavens, God on his throne saw us, saw humanity drowning in misery, slaves to sin, slaves to addiction, slaves to mess, slaves to hell. We are destined for hell. It broke the very heart of God, so much so that God took on flesh, Jesus Christ, emptied himself, left his throne to walk among us. It led him to taking our mess, our addiction, our shame, our sin, our regret. He shouldered it all, walked to Golgotha, was nailed to a cross, put it all to death. Three days later, he walked out of his grave and announced our freedom. And yet, even still, it is so incredibly easy to then trade that freedom to once again enslave ourselves to the pursuit of pleasure and inebriation. And we've got to ask ourselves, how does that make God feel? God's like, man, I came to you, I died for you, I freed you from anything this world can offer you. And instead of pursuing me, your creator, you're pursuing creation, a bottle. Then instead of me, your creator, being your comfort, that bottle has become your comfort. Instead of me being your joy, that bottle is your joy. Instead of me being your joy, that bottle has become your pursuit. If you were completely honest with yourself, has it become too big of a deal? Are you just like, ah, it's just a necessary aid for social gatherings? Just gonna need it to relax. Find yourself looking forward to the next time.

SPEAKER_01 10:36

You're listening to The Bridge with Junior Ziegler. We'll get back to Junior in a moment. We want to tell you about one of his books, The Manual. If you're a man or raising a man, married to a man, maybe dating a man, there's a lot of confusion around what real manhood actually is. In the manual, Junior cuts through the noise, both the over-the-top macho stuff and the politically correct definitions, and he gets to the raw core of manhood. He exposes the toxic masculinity for what it really is, not manhood at all. This book is simple, honest, powerful, and it might just change how you view men, strength, and leadership. We'd love to send you a copy of the manual. Just visit juniorziglar.com and give a gift of any amount towards this show, and we'll send it to you. That's junior z-i e-g L E R dot com. Now let's get back to Junior's message.

SPEAKER_02 11:28

I had like lunch last year, like a pastor one time. We sat down, and I mean I get it because it's just kind of like socially acceptable. We sat down, he's just like, oh, I need a beer. It's like, dude, it's like 11 30, man. Like, do you really need it though? Like, come on. Not only can alcohol eclipse what God offers, but it can enslave, or it's something we just need. And that slope is slippery. So let me give a few practical ways to monitor our freedom. Number number one, take frequent breaks. So if this is gonna be something that you approach, you have, I would say that you have that right, that freedom, but take frequent breaks. There's a saying I love, I don't know who said it, but I tried to apply it in many areas of life, and that is if you can't rest from it, you're a slave to it. Whether it's phones, coffee, TV, cigars, sugar, alcohol, if you can't rest from it, you're a slave to it. And so if you feel that you can honor God and enjoy a drink, again, I would say, biblically speaking, that would be freedom, your freedom, but periodic rest from it is massively helpful engaging where you're at. Evaluating something requires you to step back. And that's the problem. Is come on, we're all terrible self-evaluators, aren't we? Like either we're too hard on ourselves or we're too easy on ourselves. And when it comes to drinking, we're we're usually too easy on ourselves. And so it's easy to think like, I don't know, I got this, I'm totally fine. But it's not until you have to say no a few times that you realize that you were dependent. Like it is so easy, and this is a story of good friends of mine. It's like you enjoy a drink, and then a nightcap kind of becomes part of your you know, nighttime routine, and then the nightcap gets a little bit earlier, and then it's like, oh, we had dinner and a friend brought over some wine, but I still have that nightcap. And then out of nowhere, it's like you look back at the month, the week, and you're like, man, I drank most days. Maybe you never got drunk, but it's like it's just silently becoming this big staple in the evenings. It's like, all right, take a break. It helps you self-evaluate, but it's also just healthy. It is wild how God designed our bodies for periodic breaks. Taking a break from alcohol not only aids in less less fat buildup in the liver, but uh indigestion, lowering blood pressure. Like we were designed to take breaks, map out breaks, and stick to them. And if you find yourself in the midst of a break, being like, this is hard, guess what? We got to extend that break then. Uh, then next, to evaluate your freedom, have accountability. Alcohol loves blind spots. You have any blind spots in your car? You know what annoys me the most? Maybe not the most. You know what annoys me a lot when driving is when you're going down the road and someone like stays in your blind spot and just drives there. I hate that. It's like drives me and it's like, dude, just like pass me or get behind me. But like you're blocking traffic and you're driving right where I can't see you. Alcohol loves to do that. Good accountability is more eyes on that blind spot. The guy, I have four guys and we meet regularly. And this is one of the questions that that we'll ask each other. It's like, all right. And we ask a lot of questions, but one of them is like, how many drinks do you have this past week? Any boundaries crossed? And then we'll jump on each other. Like, ah, I know you think you're fine, man, but like, that's too many days. Like, think about it this way: anything with potential danger requires accountability. I was looking up at our camp this summer and we have a high ropes course, and and there's state inspections. So state inspector comes out and has to inspect everything. There's accountability because it's potentially dangerous. We light fireworks off that camp. There's certifications and state inspections for the storage facility where are you keeping those fireworks? Because it can be dangerous. Alcohol, which can be enjoyed in a healthy way, it also has some great potential danger and it requires accountability in more eyes. And I would go as far as to say, I know this is where it's like I'm gonna come across strict and legalistic, but I'll say it anyways. If you don't have anyone in your life that you trust to really call you out, if you don't have anyone in your life who just never really gets in your business, I would say you don't have the support system to approach drinking then. It was years ago when I met him, but I remember it like it was yesterday. In fact, I remember the day, it was a Monday. Uh, I'd walked home for a quick lunch and I ran back to the office. And uh, as I came into the front doors of the office, I saw him sitting by the elevators, just staring at the floor. And I said, How's it going? Well, I continued to walk. You ever do that? It was like, I don't want to get caught in conversations and we're gonna be like, Hey, how's it going? And we continue to walk, and then that's what I did. And and he says, Not good, man. Like, well, I can't keep walking after hearing that. So I was like, I'm sorry, you uh waiting to talk to someone? I didn't even know how he's got let in. And and that's when he started bawling. So he told me his name was Bob, that's his actual name. He's an architect, very successful architect, working on buildings downtown, designing buildings downtown, uh, making great money, beautiful wife, healthy kids, big house. And I'm not a great counselor. And so, as he's crying, telling me this, I asked, like, that doesn't seem like anything to cry about. That kind of sounds awesome. And he says, Well, I'm crying because I lost it all. I drank it all away. I lost my job. I started selling stuff in the house. My wife left, froze my assets, her and the kids are gone. I live with my mom now, just down the street. Uh, I'm fresh out of rehab. I just came here because if I go home, I'll drink. I told him about our celebrate recovery program that meets on Tuesday night. I said, Man, it's tomorrow night. You know, in fact, here's what I'll do. I'll pick you up at seven and I'll I'll take you. I'll I'll just go with you. So I walked him home. Uh met his mom, elderly lady, sweet thing. And I said, Tomorrow, seven, I'm gonna be here. He's like, all right. Next day, seven o'clock, I'm at his door with a friend. Lights are all off. Like, we're knocking, and there's no answer, everything's dark inside. I did something I shouldn't have. I just wasn't thinking, but I just broke in. The door, I don't know, the door was unlocked. So I walked into the house and my friend said, I'm not going in. I said, That's fine, I'll just go in. So sorry, yeah. I was like, Bob, no answer. Like, turn on the light, like Bob told you I'm coming, man. Like, come on, bro. That's when I see his legs in another room, like on the floor. He's like lying on the floor in skibbies. That's when it hit me. I was like, this guy's dead. What am I gonna tell the cops? Like, I broke in just to get him. I swear he has thankfully he was breathing. So I called my buddy in, you know, he just passed out, and uh we wake him up. He's more drunk than really anybody I've met that's drunk, you know, prop him up on the bed, and he's telling me to leave, you know, slurring words, can't even sit up, you know. He's angry yelling, like, yo, go away. Like, no man, we're doing this. I'm coming with you. Let's go. Dressing a drunk man is is harder than dressing a two-year-old. Yeah, it's like trying to put his shirt on, putting his pants on, wrestling his feet to get his socks on. And as my friend puts his shoes on, Bob starts crying. Like, just go. Everyone else has left. I'm a lost cause. Just go. Why are you doing this? And it's an image that I won't soon forget. Bob's sitting on the edge of the bed, and my friend Chris is kneeling down, tying his shoes. And Chris says, Because you're worth more than this. You're worth way more than this. Jesus came to pull you out of this, and I just get to help him. And so we got some coffee and some water in his system, and got him into church. Did the same thing the next week. Uh the week after that, I got a call from uh Bob's sister. It's February. Bob had wandered to the local liquor store in the neighborhood, and on his walk back home, he'd passed out and froze to death in an in a neighbor's front yard. I found him in the next morning, frozen, just a couple houses from his mom's. I share that for two reasons. First reason is I try to remember my friend anytime I enjoy a drink. Like this stuff can be dangerous. And there must be a high regard for the boundaries and high standards. I'm not gonna treat something lightly that tears apart families and enslaves people. But the second reason I share this is statistically, some of us are closer to Bob's struggle than we think we are. And I get it, you hear a story like that, or you watch an alcoholic, and it's really easy to think, well, I'm not that bad. Okay, well, is that your standard though? Is that really your standard? Because I would venture to say that there's some problems in this very room that haven't been admitted. And maybe you've had some people kind of make a comment here or there, and you've been very quick to just dismiss that. Maybe even get a little bit bothered by that. But there's just been this overconsumption, this overemphasis, this dependence. And I get that there's strong emotion with that. I know I'm I'm hitting a sore spot right now. This is a can of worms. I know there can be a little anger, some self-denial, some deflection, downplaying the severity of where things are at. There can be some shame that rushes in with this, past situations that were fueled with alcohol. And it's not my intention for you to just sit there and all of those regrets. Like wherever you're at when it comes to this topic, maybe you're upset with me for being too strict, or maybe you're upset with me for not condemning drinking, feeling regret and shame. Wherever you're at on this, I just want to finish by telling you what Chris told Bob. You're worth more. You're worth more than the clouded mind. You're worth more than the low standards of this world. You're worth more than the alluring slavement that alcohol can offer. You're worth more than all of that. God paid an incredibly high price for you. And so let's glorify God with our bodies. Let's be sober-minded, filled not with cheap substances that lead to regret, but filled with God that leads to power. And may what God has done for you, the gospel, always be on your mind. And may that incredible reality guard your mind and your heart and tether you from being led astray by something that leads so many people astray.

SPEAKER_01 21:20

You're listening to The Bridge with Junior Ziggler. That was part two of Junior's message, sobriety, part of our proverb series. And man, what a heartbreaking story about Bob. I remember Junior telling me the story the night Bob actually froze to death, and I remember being extremely humbled by it. Which is interesting because you might hear that story and think, man, that would never happen to me. I would never get so lost in addiction for that to happen to me. And listen, I hope that's true. But the reality is that our addictions can lead to death in many different ways. Think about how many sinful tendencies that you have that's killed relationships. Or think about how someone enslaved to something has killed their own hopes or joys or spirits. The reality is there's a world of tempting things that are trying to draw us away from worshiping our Creator to the created. One of the most challenging ideas from today's message is that sobriety is about more than just avoiding drunkenness, it's about maintaining freedom. God wants you free. I think some of us are so stuck in this loop of thinking God just wants to suck all of the fun and pleasure out of our lives, but the opposite is true. God wants you free. I loved Junior's phrase. If you can't rest from it, you're a slave to it. That opens the conversation up to a lot more than just drinking. I think of phones, social media, streaming shows, work, shopping, video games, even good things like exercise, golf, even sports can start to take on too much importance in our lives. So what about you listening? Would there be something you would struggle to rest from? Something that you don't want to take a break from? Could it be that the that thing is starting to control more of your life than it should? It's healthy to admit it. That's why I found the ending of Junior's message so moving. The reminder that every person struggling, every person trapped, every person hiding a dependency or an addiction is not rejected by God. You're worth more than that thing that's controlling you. You are worth more than that habit. You are worth more than settling for a lesser freedom. As you go on your day, maybe spend some time asking God that simple question. Is there anything in my life that's beginning to master me? And if there is, don't ignore it. Bring it to the light, talk to someone, ask for help, pursue the freedom Christ died to give you. Thanks for joining us today. We'll continue next time as Junior opens God's Word again. Well, you have been listening to The Bridge with Junior Ziggler, a listener-supported broadcast. Junior is the lead teaching pastor at the bridge in Chicagoland, and we're so glad that you joined us today. As we told you earlier, we would love to send you a copy of Junior's book, The Manual. Whether you're a man, you're raising a man, married to a man, dating a man, this book cuts through the noise and gets to the raw core of manhood itself. All you have to do is jump on Junior's website, juniorziggler.com, and give a gift of any amount towards this show, and we'll send it right to you. While you're there, you'll also find great resources like today's message, all of Junior's books and podcasts, plus a link to our church, The Bridge. If you're in the Chicagoland area, we'd love to see you at one of our services. Again, that's juniorziggler.com. Junior Z-I-E-G L-E-R dot com. Thanks for listening. See you next time.

SPEAKER_00 24:36

The bridge with Junior Ziggler is a production of the Bridge Community Church.