Meet a High School Math Teacher

You think you know what teachers do all day until you hear what happens after the bell rings, after the emails pile up, and after the policies change without anyone asking the people in the room. 

This week on Workplace Confessions: Behind Closed Doors, we’re joined by an anonymous high school math teacher with 18 years in California public schools, and she tells the truth about why relationships matter more than worksheets and why the emotional load of the job follows you home.  

We dig into the gap between what teachers can control inside their classrooms and what gets decided outside of them. She shares what she wishes every parent would do today. We also talk about “accountability” as the missing ingredient and how those patterns show up later in the workplace. Then we get real about the post-COVID classroom, safety drills, and the rise in student mental health needs. 

If you care about education, parenting, school safety, or the future workforce, this one will stick with you. Subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review so more people can hear these behind-closed-doors stories.

Want to be interviewed? You can remain anonymous. Voice distortion now available. Email or Text us!

Transcript

Welcome And The Anonymous Promise

SPEAKER_01 0:02

Welcome to Workplace Confessions Behind Closed Doors. I'm Elsa Barbie. And I'm Don Andrews. We have been friends since sixth grade. Somewhere between a car wash job, a few questionable boy choices, and 40 years of friendship, we became the kind of people who always want to know what's really going on, including at work.

SPEAKER_02 0:21

Don spent 25 years as an employment lawyer digging into workplace drama from the inside out. I built a long career in the beauty industry as a brand educator with a few TV cameos sprinkled in for fun.

SPEAKER_01 0:33

We came up in very different industries, but we have the same passion. Meeting new people and asking how they got their jobs, what they love, what they can't stand, and what happens behind closed doors.

SPEAKER_02 0:45

Every episode, we talk to a new guest about their lived experience in the world of work. And because our guests stay anonymous, they can spill the truth without the fallout.

SPEAKER_01 0:54

We get into the choices they made, the tiny cruelties, the surprise kindnesses, and some of the moments that never make it into human resources reports.

SPEAKER_02 1:03

Equal Parts Informative and titillating. This show serves up all the tea while honoring the incredible, complicated, often messy work people are doing across the industries and across the map. Welcome to Workplace Confessions Behind Closed Doors. Let's get into it.

From Engineering Dreams To Teaching

SPEAKER_02 1:32

Let's start with the beginning. What was your first paying job?

SPEAKER_00 1:37

My first.

SPEAKER_01 2:06

Oh my god. So these were kids your age getting arrested in front of you.

SPEAKER_00 2:10

Yes. It was crazy. Okay. And what do you do today? I am a teacher. I teach high school math. I've been teaching for about 18 years. This is my 18th year. And before that, I did substitute teaching for a year. So I've been around for a bit.

SPEAKER_02 2:28

Can you walk us through the journey of your first job to what you do today?

SPEAKER_00 2:33

So my first job actually opened my eyes. I had no idea that kids struggle with math. I thought, all right, I got math, everybody gets math, and we all just kind of sit here bored and write down what we need to and do it. But then I became a tutor and I was like, okay, there's kids who really don't know how to do math. But before that, my whole goal was always to become an aeronautical engineer. I always wanted to be an aerospace engineer. I want to work for NASA. And then NASA got discontinued when we were, I was a sophomore in high school. So I was like, okay, yeah, then I can't work for NASA anymore. So then I changed it to civil engineering. And then so from there, when I was in college, I was like, okay, I can do civil engineering. And then I did single subject math so I could teach math.

SPEAKER_01 3:13

Nice.

SPEAKER_00 3:14

So did you get your degree? What was your degree in? Civil engineering with the water emphasis and then a single subject mathematic teaching. So I didn't have to take like all those crazy tests that teachers take. So if I got that degree, then I was like exempt from all the tests. And then right after college, you would you just got the job that you have now? Yeah. Yeah. I started teaching when I was 22. Oh my God. So it's funny to see my students because I'm like, how old are you? And they're like, oh, I'm like, I'm 35. And I'm like, oh, that's weird. Like you're five years younger than me. You were my student, and you're five years younger than me. Our kids are the same age. Totally weird. That is weird.

SPEAKER_02 3:51

It seems like you've always been in the teaching type of field. Where does that stem from?

SPEAKER_00 3:58

Oh I think honestly, my first tutoring experience, I think getting that first my feet wet in there, because I was always in the nerd classes, like the AP classes and the honor classes. I was with kids who always were like-minded like me. We just sat there and we did our work and we wrote everything down we were supposed to. And so then it was like, oh, it's a whole new world out there that I had no idea about. And I didn't notice that until after high school.

SPEAKER_01 4:20

Excellent. What's the best part about what you're doing now?

SPEAKER_00 4:25

You know what? That changes on a day-to-day basis. But I would say the best part is there's a best part and there's the hardest part. There's the best part that you teach the kids to create their own wings and follow their dreams. And the hard part is not knowing what happens in the end. You let them go at 18 and then you say goodbye. And then some of them you don't really see them anymore. Social media really helps and being able to see what they're doing now. And then some of them really make you smile, and then some of them make you cringe. But I definitely the relationships. My kids will tell me, Oh, I totally don't like math, but I totally like you. And so the relationships I think are what make it all worth it. That's great. What about the teaching industry as a whole? The easiest part is that what I do in my classroom. I get to control everything that happens in my classroom. No one can come in and tell me what to teach. In California, we get that luxury in a sense. In other states, you don't. But in California, in a sense, you do have to teach certain standards, but how you approach it and what you do with it is up to you. That's the art of it. That's the beauty of it. The hard part is the part outside your classroom you can't control. And so it's always like I've always told my own children, control your controllables. Because then it's if you hang on to everything else that bothers you, it's gonna eat at you, which it does all the time as a teacher. But it's really frustrating when people outside of the classroom are making decisions for inside your classroom or what you get to do. That's very frustrating because there's people who aren't even in the classroom for more than five years and they become administrators or different parts that are no longer in a classroom setting, and they're making these roles and they're making these schedules, and they're just like, for example, we had testing this week, and one of our classes was 50 minutes long, and then the rest of them were 25. But it's like what? Like, how as a teacher, what do you want me to do with that? You want me to be like, okay, time

Classroom Freedom And Outside Frustrations

SPEAKER_00 6:10

out, 25 minutes stops in the 15-minute class? They just they don't think about teachers in that retrospect, and it's just but we're the ones in the classroom. So I think that's the most frustrating part about education is all the decisions being made outside for us are not in are not including us in the decisions.

SPEAKER_01 6:26

What about pressure from parents?

SPEAKER_00 6:29

Uh yeah. So parents have the not sure if they have blinders sometimes. Some parents have blinders. My kid is amazing. My kid would never do that in the way, come sit with me. Usually parents are really supportive. I would say maybe 10% of them aren't, or where they really question you. Are you really sure you're talking about my student? But for the most part, parents are supportive, but then there's very few that are actually involved, especially in high school. High school is really tough because I think they just figure, like, all right, they're just they're old enough. We don't really need to keep that much of an eye on them. And so parent support in high school is a little tough.

SPEAKER_02 7:06

The speaking about that, if we had a bunch of parents listening to you right now as a teacher, what would you tell them that would help their child?

SPEAKER_00 7:16

I would definitely say sign up for the grade and the portal, whatever's available at your school. Sign up so that you can receive those messages. Don't block us from those messages. There's so many parents that say, Oh, I just blocked the phone call or I just blocked the text or blocked the email. Don't block them because they're really important. And the teachers who take the time to send them, like they're taking time out of their own day and they're not just like sitting there in class ignoring your student and then sending a message. And I think you as a parent, ask questions. If you're not sure, ask a question. Because a lot of times parents will come to conferences and they'll be like, oh, my student just said they turned it in. And so a lot of times I do my due diligence and I'll be like, all assignments, all late assignments have been graded, all grades have been entered. If your student says says that something is missing, it's not. So please contact me with any questions. But I think more than anything, just ask questions. If you don't know, if you're not sure, send an email, make a phone call, send a text through the portal or communication or whatever your school has available to you.

SPEAKER_02 8:14

Nice. Nice. If you could wave a magic wand and change one thing about your industry, what would it be?

SPEAKER_00 8:23

Uh accountability. I think accountability on all ends, on student ends, on parent ends, on teacher ends. Kids come to high school with so many gaps. And I can't, I was talking to my sister-in-law the other day because she's an educator and she was telling me that there's a study, I think it's a Mississippi. They're the only state where reading scores have gone up. And that's because grade three, if you cannot read, you do not get to move on. Like, period. And so they set this standard that, like, when you have the conference, they're gonna tell you if your student does not read by the end of this year, they're gonna be held back. And so that accountability is really important because once we don't have accountability, like they create these gaps, and as they get older, the gaps get bigger. And that makes it more difficult for teachers as they move on to harder, harder concepts and more complex things.

unknown 9:13

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 9:14

Are students able to sometimes fake it enough to get moved along when they really can't read very well?

SPEAKER_00 9:23

Oh, that's a good question. You know what? I think I think memorization is huge and elementary. So I think with that, I think students can do it. I can memorize a book, I can remember what happens, I can remember what the study guide looks like, or if because things are so routine, they figure out how their teacher is going to do it. So then they learn how they adapt to the way that teacher's doing it. So I definitely think so for a while. But when you get to sixth, seventh, eighth grade, I think that's where that gap just is showing because there's no longer you're like now you're in multiple classes and expectations are different. So I think it just becomes too much to try to make it till you make it.

SPEAKER_01 10:04

Yeah, definitely. I was wondering about that with audiobooks because you could just get the audiobook for whatever you're reading in class, go listen to it at night. If your memory is pretty good, you might be able to pull the wool off your teacher over your teacher's eyes, right?

SPEAKER_00 10:16

Oh, yeah. I think audiobooks are great. I think all kids should have access to them, but I think they're becoming the norm with the new books we're buying and what technology. But I think that would be incredible. But hold them to it's just as a teacher, then you have to figure out okay, if they're listening to the audiobook, like how do I ensure their comprehension? And as long as teachers are doing that, I think it's fine because you want all students to have different access depending on their learning. And so if they learn through Audible, then you want them to have that access.

SPEAKER_01 10:44

Yeah, that makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 10:47

What's a myth that people believe about your job that drives you nuts?

SPEAKER_00 10:51

Oh, that we have vacations off and that we go home scot-free and we have summer off. That's really hard because it's just wait, well, or it's that one thing just to think we're a babysitter because it's just you, it's not like a an accountant job where you shut it off and you can go home and start where you left off. It's like you go home with like all the heavy stuff. So you don't get to go home and relax. And then especially because my husband and I were both educators. So we'll come home and we vent to each other about okay. Did you do you know this student? Do you know that student? And it was just like we have to talk about it. So we can't just leave it at work and then you'll we have an in high school, we have an hour to prep. Elementary teachers don't have that prep. So I can't imagine what their life looks like when they have to get the whole week ready and they have no time during the day to do it. God bless them.

SPEAKER_02 11:36

Yeah. So do tell us about your summers because the myth that we always thought was like, yeah, you only get to work eight or nine months a year, and the rest of time you're just on vacation.

SPEAKER_00 11:46

So I'm a summer school teacher, I'm the teacher that other teachers get mad at. Um so I think of my future in terms of summer school teaching. So, as teachers in California, we actually have a nice supplemental retirement. And so anytime you do extra tutoring, you do summer school, you coach, you do extra jobs outside your classroom that you get paid for, you get the supplemental income. And so when you retire, you get to take out that money as you choose. You can take it all out all at all out at once, or you can take it out in pieces, however you choose. And so I've always done summer school because the percentage you can get back is more than during the year. So I'm trying to build something so that when I'm done teaching, I have type of thing. And and so I and I also do summer school just because my oldest just graduated from college and then my middle child is in college. So it's just we don't get paid one month out of the year. So if you don't do summer school, then you either have to make sure that you save or you have to go without that month, that paycheck in July. So a couple of reasons why all the above.

SPEAKER_01 12:52

Yeah. What changes have you noticed

Parent Support And Real Accountability

SPEAKER_01 12:55

as a teacher from before COVID to now to after COVID?

SPEAKER_00 13:01

There's so many. It's actually been very disheartening. I tell my husband, gosh, I wish I was in 40. Like I told I could totally do something different with my life right now, but I love my job. Like I totally love my job, but a lot of times I feel like parents just give their kids a phone and say, go and go live your life. And I feel like that, or that's how I'm gonna keep track of you. And so I feel like kids have a lot more independence and so less guidance, and that's really frustrating. There's I feel like there's a lot less caring, but still caring. So I'm not saying no one cares or no parents care, but there's definitely been a downturn. And so, yeah, like the sense of community is no longer what it used to be before COVID. Before COVID, it was great, even amongst teachers. Before COVID, it was amazing, and now it's very, it's very separated. And so I that's something that is struggling. And then they made a lot of rules during COVID that were implemented, so especially when it came into behavioral, so the way students can get in trouble, whether it's for drugs, vaping, fighting, all of that was changed by the state of California while we were in COVID, while we were at home in 2021. And so it's made it a lot harder to get kids in trouble for really bad behavior. And so when you don't discipline at school and kids find out you're not going to discipline, then you create this huge problem. And I think that's what we have right now, especially in high schools. We have a huge vaping problem. We have a huge fighting problem. And it's not because our admin doesn't want to do something about it. It's just they have to follow a lot of steps. Before it was like you brought a knife to school, you're expelled. Now, if you brought a knife to school, did we give you a pop-tart and a candy? And did we sit down and have pumbaya with you? And it's just no, you don't have to do that. There are instances where that needs to be done, but now we have these really long processes that we must follow in order to be able to make our classroom safe. And I think that's become very different before COVID from before COVID.

SPEAKER_01 14:56

What does COVID have to do with that? Why do those two things coincide in timing?

SPEAKER_00 15:02

It does because so California has a system where you get money according to how you're doing, according to your state scores, how many kids you suspend, how many kids you graduate, how your students in homelessness are doing, how your students who are foster students are doing, how your students who are second language learners are doing. So all of your money comes according to how you're doing on these. And then if you're not doing well, your school becomes under review. And once your school becomes under review, then they're taking money away from you, or you're having to put money into these programs that doesn't suit like all the students in your school. And so that is what it does. So it's, oh my gosh, you have a 97% graduation rate. But but then you see this report from UCSD saying that the kids that are going to college have an eighth grade math level. So it's just that it's not coinciding anymore. But because we're trying to reach these, we're trying to move up in colors. So orange, yellow, green, red, orange, yellow, green, when you're trying to move along, if you're not moving along, then your school is punished in terms of where you must spend your money and how you must bring up the numbers. And so if you show a high suspension rate or a high tardy rate or a high absence rate or a high referral rate, then you get knocked down in those colors.

SPEAKER_01 16:18

Okay. Why did that start during COVID though?

SPEAKER_00 16:21

Any honestly, I think it was because people weren't paying attention to law and the lawmakers. And so I think they just passed things. And so because we weren't as unionized because we were all at home, then nobody really knew like how to fight back on it until it was like until it was a law.

SPEAKER_01 16:37

How do you see things in the classroom changing, if at all due to artificial intelligence?

SPEAKER_00 16:44

Yes. Oh, you know what? I think it's our students use it all the time. We have we use it. I think it's a great thing. I think it's a great thing if it's helping you create things. If it's just for copying, then I think it's awful. But if it's to help you create, and it's if you write something and you tell Chat GPT to turn it into something different or to like, what do you think about it? And you have a conversation with ChatGPT, I think that's amazing because you're doing something educational. Whereas if you're copying, then you're not doing anything educational, you're just copying and pasting. And so we actually talked about that. We have LCAP meetings of how we plan to spend our money next year. And so that one of some of the teachers are like, well, how can we get one of those AI programs here at our school? What can we do, or like how can we implement one? So it's definitely in conversations, at least at our school. I know other schools like use it completely and utterly for everything. And so I think it varies from school to school. But I think it's great for certain things. And then obviously it's not great for other things of just like technology, like the new studies that are coming out, how it hurts students' mental health if they're on it all day long, and how it it makes their social relationships awful or horrible, or it makes them non-existent. Because and I tell parents that all the time, I'm like, when your students come in, they put their phones in the calculator caddy, they grab their calculator, and I'm like, we'll be doing an activity and they're talking to each other, and there's noise, and then last two minutes, it's time to get their phone and they put it away, and then they get their phone and they sit down and it's like silence. And I'm just like, guys, we just had an amazing day, and now we're all scrolling through our phone. So I think there's definitely a time and place

The Vacation Myth And Summer Pay

SPEAKER_00 18:20

for it in education. We just have to do it to what suits students needs and then also to classroom needs. What kind of skill set does it take to be a teacher? Oh different types of teachers, right? So it's the relational part. I think that's super important. You have to be open. I think you have to be willing to give part of yourself to them so that you can get part of them. I think teachers are very like hands-off. And so I feel like some of those teachers can definitely be successful because they probably have lots of structure and kids love structure. Some kids really need it. But then you have those kids that, especially where I live, where kids need that connection to you, just because it's very like a Hispanic culture and they need they need that belonging. And so I think that having that part is really important. Obviously, knowing your content, that's really hard as an elementary teacher because you're expected to know five or six different contents. So, you know, sometimes you just have to pick and choose what you're gonna be great at and then what you're gonna be good at. And so I think also just being a team player, because uh there's teachers who have been teaching the same thing for 20 years. And I'm just like, if you've been teaching something for 20 years, like you're not doing anybody a service, you're not doing the kids a service, you're not doing yourself a service. We must be always willing to learn. And I think that as a teacher, you need to have that type of mentality because if you don't, you're gonna get stuck. And then when it's time to move on with the kids, that's why they're not gonna follow you.

SPEAKER_02 19:43

What is the wildest, weirdest, or most unforgettable thing that you've ever witnessed at work? And this is anonymous.

SPEAKER_00 19:51

Okay, can I tell you two? Yes. Okay, so one of them is I had these really you people would say they're a Russ group of kids, but I would just say they come from a place of needing belonging and connection. And so they had connections in the wrong place. They had connections in gangs and so I had a group of four boys, two of them were for one gang and two of them were from another. Had to sit them on separate sides of the room. And so I like my students to interact. If your students aren't interacting, then I get really bugged. If it's silent, it's just what are we doing? We're not doing anything. What are we guys? What are we doing, guys? Like, why are we not talking to each other? And man, this was a long time ago. This is when I first started teaching. They started throwing up gang signs to each other. And I'm just like, what is going on? I've never seen I've seen gang signs, but not in front of me, not in real life. And I'm just like, oh my goodness. And then I can't, I can't, and I'm just like, you go outside right now. And then so they're like, and as they're walking out, they're throwing gang signs at each other. And I'm like, oh my gosh, what am I gonna do? So then I walk outside and I'm like, what are you doing? They're like, no, miss, no, miss. Don't worry, miss. Miss, we would never fight in your class. We respect you. We would never fight. And I'm like, okay, so why are we throwing gangs at signs at each other? And then they're just like, and then they're just like, oh, it's just because we're tired. And they're saying bad words too, but they're just like, we're tired of their F and stuff, and I'm just like, okay, guys. And I was like, okay, I was like, I have to call because you guys can't be doing this. And they're like, we know, miss, we know, miss. And so I walk inside, and the other two aren't as relenting to talk to me because they're a little bit more hardened. But I would say that was really scary, that was extremely scary. And then the other one is I used to have a student, and he was probably in that same group of boys, and so he ended up leaving our school and going to the community school, and then three years later, he ends up killing someone outside of our school at night.

SPEAKER_03 21:38

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:39

And it's in the newspaper, and it's like, and there's this headshot of him, and I'm like, oh my god, that's my student. That is so insane. Right. And it's like one of those things where you hope, like, when you know, as they get older, they turn the leaf and they move forward. This guy didn't. So that those two things have always kind of stuck with me, like my little gangbingers. But yeah, and then Watching teachers get locked out of their classroom. That one's pretty funny too. But I haven't gotten locked out of my classroom, but my co-workers have, and my co-workers have even learned to write with their left hand because they will not turn their back on their students, like a certain group of students. It's crazy. It's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 22:17

Jeez. That reminds me. So you are teaching in an era where, at least in California, you have to do active shooter drills, right?

SPEAKER_00 22:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:27

So you're doing what earthquake, active shooter, fire, and then lock, and then just regular lockdown.

SPEAKER_00 22:34

We practice, we practice if there's like a search warrant going on outside of our school. Not it's not a danger to the inside of our school, but we still have to stay in our classrooms and we have to lock our doors. And so that's the other one that we practice now as well. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:48

Tell us about the active shooter drills. Yeah, not just what it entails. That's interesting, but like how is that for you

Post-COVID Rules And Student Behavior

SPEAKER_01 22:55

recognizing the frequency of school shootings in this country basically daily?

SPEAKER_00 23:00

Yeah, that's it's super scary because next to my door, there's a big glass window because whoever built our building was obviously not a teacher. And I thought like a window the size of a door would be great next to the door. I we have to show them a video and then I ask my students, what are we gonna do? Are we all just gonna sit here? Are we gonna move? Are we gonna all stay in one spot? How are we gonna cover up this window? And I have to put it on them because I can't do it all by myself. And I always tell them, I'll be the first one in front of all of you, but I also need your help. And so I have this huge screen that's movable. And so the boys are like, We'll just move that over there and we'll put the tables up against the window and then we'll all spread out and we'll just grab stuff because I also share with them the things of the different studies they do where if you throw things or if you have things like you don't just sit there or stand there and you actually try to make an attempt, they're less likely to hurt you. And then obviously the quiet part about it. And then we talk about it on we have an app as teacher called catapult. And so what it'll do is it'll send the teachers note on our phone and it'll send it to our computer, teacher computer as well, and it'll let us know what the lockdown is for, and it'll give us an idea of the location on campus. So there's a map, and so it'll be like, so when we practice, it'll be like active shooter in the law academy building, and then it'll show us where it's at. And like I tell my students that I'm like, we'll make a decision and if we're gonna leave, like we're all gonna leave. And if we're all gonna stay, we're all gonna stay. Like we'll run to the baseball field because they have cemented baseball dugouts, like that'll be our safest spot, or like we'll run to the closest fence, like at exit. But I'm like, we never we'll never know if there's more than one shooter. So I think that's the scary part, like talking to them about it is like if there's not more than one shooter and they're coming from different places, like we might be running into something. I am on the second floor as well. So they do say like on the second floor, it's it's not as likely that they'll come up first, they'll start lower because then if they go up, somebody's more than likely to see them. That's helpful. We do have at least we have a newer building that I am in, and she does have the ability to lock everything with just one button in the front office so she can lock our whole building and all of our classrooms, which is pretty cool. But when we do the when we do the drill, like I'm like, we have to take this very seriously. We're not all gonna sit on one corner together, the kids spread out. I've taught them how to turn off the lights, how to put the blinds down. I've taught them like the keys and like different things in my classroom, like where things are, so they know just like the basic needs that they would need to do. And we have when we do those active shooter drills, we have security or police, we have a policeman on campus. They come around, they make sure our doors are locked, like they'll pull on it really hard, they'll knock on the door, so none of the kids answer. And then after that, we'll do the earthquake and fire drill, and then we'll go out to the field and wait. But the kids are very attentive when we watch those videos or when we talk about it. It's not like something where it's like, I'm not gonna pay attention to this conversation.

SPEAKER_02 25:50

So, yeah, that's a good thing. Has there ever been a situation, a threatening situation in the past 18 years that you've been teaching?

SPEAKER_00 25:59

At our school, no. It comes more from outside our school than anything. Like the police are chasing someone, and so we have to go on lockdown. But or sometimes like we have homeless that walk by, and if security guards see them, especially towards the end of the day, we'll make sure not to let kids off a campus because kids can be mean, but also homeless can be mean. So we just try to protect both on both sides. But no, not that I know of. We haven't had anything like we've had students bring like knives and guns to school, but we never find out in the moment, unfortunately. We've always, I feel like we're the last ones to know, and so we always find out like later, or they've had those threats like yik yak. Remember that app, yck yak, a long time ago? No, it was like a Snapchat where you didn't know who was typing. And so back we had yik yak kids put threatening stuff, and we had that, but so they actually canceled school that day. We didn't have school the next day, but then the police were able to get a hold of who it was. And so we've had, I think, three of those threats in the past five to ten years, and they didn't have there was no basis behind it. Kids were just being stupid pretty much. Yeah, and so then nothing came of it. I think they got expelled. Hopefully that they got expelled, but we're I'm not really sure exactly what happened to them, but I know they did get they weren't in school for either a long time or uh back at all.

SPEAKER_01 27:18

Okay. Or have there been other trends, online trends that are impacting the school and the behavior of the students?

SPEAKER_00 27:28

Oh my god, yeah. So definitely TikTok. You'll walk down hallways and they're like dancing in TikToks or putting inappropriate things. More recently, I don't think it was true, but a young man tried to say another young man was making making a naked AI images of students. So that's something that's coming to light now. We have to be careful with. So using AI in that way. So no pictures were ever brought forward, but students did make our principal aware of it. So that was pretty tough. And then Snapchat is always a problem because we can't see things. And it's just it's honestly now instead of talking to each other about someone, now we're talking about them in a group chat. So it's just moved from in-person to technology. So that's and then obviously the cyberbullying. I I haven't heard too much about it more recently as I did when technology first began. I think it was a lot more, but now kids are more resilient in terms of being able to speak up and let people know what's happening. And I feel like we, if we create that environment where they know they either can't do it or where we're willing to listen, then we can combat it that way. But it's dependent on every every student is different. But yeah, I would say those things are things at school, are like kids want to still tag. Let me go tag on the wall. And it's like, why? There's two graffiti, yeah. Yeah, I just say Instagram. I was like, Yeah, that's that's actually kind of come back this year. Graffiti definitely has come back this year. It's really weird. Trending. Yeah, and they'll send us pictures before I remember when I first started teaching, they would send us pictures and they'll be like, if you see this writing on anybody's folders or any papers, please let us know. And so we we went back to that this year, which kind of crazy, but old school. But but that's back a little bit, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 29:08

Interesting. What about that trend a couple of years ago where students were vandalizing school restrooms and things like that? I remember hearing something about that.

SPEAKER_00 29:18

Oh yeah, we have that a little bit, but then we had our security guards started standing in the restrooms and so it took care of that. But yeah, and so now we have camera systems. I think with technology has come these cameras, and you walk down our hallways and we have signs that say smile, you're on camera. So obviously they're not in the restrooms, but they are like everywhere else. So it's like, oh, that wasn't there when I went in at 1055. Go look at the cameras between 1055 and this the time we saw it, and let's see who came in and out of the restroom. And then you get to call them in and question them.

SPEAKER_02 29:49

Somebody with as many years as you have, if somebody was just thinking about becoming a teacher, what advice would you give them?

SPEAKER_00 29:58

Oh man, you should have asked me this last year. This year has been tough. This year's been really tough. Kids,

AI In School And Phone Culture

SPEAKER_00 30:05

kids can be kids are different, and I think it comes down to how we're raising that. But if teaching is really your thing and you have an art for it, not the science. Anyone, I think a lot of people can do the science easily. I think most of us, whether teachers or not, we all have the science of something. But the art is really important. We have to find a different way to keep students entertained. It's no longer where we sat there and we did our work and we wrote in our notebooks and the bell rang and we moved on. Students need us because they have all these things that capture their attention now. And so if you learn the art and you love the art, then become a teacher and do it. Don't do it for the paycheck, don't do it for the vacations, don't do it for the summer off. Even though I'll be honest, it's really helpful as a mom to do it. Speaking from my own background, I loved being able to spend that time with my children at home. But do it because you want to make a difference. And because in 10 years, you're gonna find that kid that said, I remember you, I remember your class, I remember when you taught us about taxes. Now I have to do my own taxes, and it's crazy. And I'll never forget that chapter. I might not have paid attention on any other chapter, but I did on that one. And so you have to really want to be able to do the art. You don't have to be artsy fartsy every day, as I call it, but like interacting with the kids, being able to have those relationships and knowing that also sometimes it's really hard to turn it off the job. So if you can be okay with that internally, then you're gonna be okay. And it's a roller coaster. You have amazing years and you have not so amazing years, but I always keep saying, I'm gonna go find something different, but I'm like, no, this is where I'm at, and I'm okay with it. Like, and I told my friends, I used to be a great teacher, and now I'm a good teacher, and I'm okay with that because I'm growing in so many different ways just as a person, and so I don't have to be great at everything, but I know that being good is good for my students.

SPEAKER_02 31:52

I love that. Align alliance of teaching as well. I know several teachers who actually coach high school teams or other things. Do you do anything, any extracurricular activities or anything besides just teaching?

SPEAKER_00 32:06

So I coached softball for 15 years. So from 2008 until whatever, plus 15, 2022. You're the math teacher. I know. I coached softball, it was incredible. I loved it. I'd still speak to so many of my players. It was the most incredible thing. But yeah, so when my little one came along, now I'm like the new amazing taxi driver. Before I had my mom and my dad and my husband to help me, and now it's like I get to do it all with him and I love it, but I would never take back those 15 years, and I definitely miss it. So I think if you ever had the love of because we have robotics club, we have drama, we have a rock combo, we have baseball, we have football, we have all the sports. If you ever get to do one of those things because and you love to do those things, I would totally say do it because as a teacher, it's just it's just those connections you get to continue to make out of the classroom, and it helps so much. And it's just it's incredible feeling because it's again, it's yours, and it's like you get to claim it. And I loved it for the 15 years I did it. I completely and utterly miss it, but I don't think I'll ever go back.

SPEAKER_02 33:14

Oh, I love that. So you touched on years, good years, bad years. During those bad years, what what keeps you going?

SPEAKER_00 33:25

Oh, my co-workers. I have the most amazing coworkers, and I can go to them and I can tell them when I'm having a bad day, or I can go to them and I can tell them what I'm struggling with, and I'm like, okay, I need your opinion. And they'll be honest with me. And especially if you're having trouble with admin, because some admins, they're like awful humans, like pain in the butts, and you just try to avoid them at all costs, like the play. And they, I my coworkers will be like, remember, the teachers are always the ones who are here in the end. They're the ones who get 35 years of teaching. You'll never see an admin with 35 years of administration. But the teachers, you're gonna see the teacher, and so we're the ones who are here all the time, and we're the ones who stick together. That's great.

SPEAKER_02 34:02

Can we touch on the conflict of teachers versus admins? What give us a couple examples as to that type of dynamic relationship?

SPEAKER_00 34:12

So a lot of times we do things, and when students ask why am I doing this? You can't just be a teacher and be like, just do it because I said so. Kind of like parents, we kind of like, why do we have to do this? Because I said so, go do it. And so, as a teacher, you want to give them that why because the why is important, the why is the connection for students. And so, as a teacher, you want to know why are we doing this? Give it to me straight. And a lot of times it's like we're implementing this new thing and we're paying lots of money for okay, why? And who helped make the decision? Was there teachers involved? The other thing is now that COVID is around, like things are a lot different. Students are different, we're all different. And so most administrators have never been teachers during COVID. They didn't experience COVID and they didn't spirit experience life after COVID. So for them to want to come and try to tell me what to do or what not to do with students and the new coming of age that we have with students, it's really hard to listen sometimes. It's really hard to sit down and be like, Yes, I'm gonna take your advice because you've been doing this in administration for the last seven years, but you've never stepped foot in a classroom. And so I think that's really there's a disconnect. There's a huge disconnect. And we end up, we're teachers are horrible students. When we sit in meetings, we are awful. We are awful. We are all on our phones, we are all so bad. We are the worst students ever. But I think it's because we have that disconnect. So, like we we're all just sending text messages to each other and saying nonsense, and we're awful humans. But I think it's a huge disconnect. And so we just want that, and also you want your leader to carry you. You shouldn't be carrying them, they should be carrying you, or you should feel like shared responsibility. And I don't think we have that in a lot of schools right now.

SPEAKER_01 35:52

I hear from a lot of adults

Unforgettable Incidents And Safety Drills

SPEAKER_01 35:55

who are employers of young people, Gen Z, that they're a different generation. They lack intrinsic motivation. And I was speaking with two law firm partners on Friday night at an event, and they were just at their wits' end about these young attorneys and how to get them to do their job. And I'm wondering if, because I'm not entirely sure that's true, I just hear it from a lot of people. And so I'm wondering, are you seeing a change? Do you think Gen Z is different than maybe millennials in terms of work ethic or drive or desire for material things or anything else?

SPEAKER_00 36:33

Oh my gosh. Check, check, yes. All the yes. Oh my gosh, yes. We talk about it all the time. We we honestly just had the conversation this week at lunch. We had we got to have lunch together because it was a half day, and so we went to go eat lunch, and we're just like, yo, like this kid has like 18 tardies. If you're tardy 18 times to work, you are gonna be kicked out. There is nothing, you are fired. And if you miss 16 times in half a year, you are fired. And so we definitely have these conversations. And I was telling them, I was like, yo, I email parents, I'm like, huh, your student has their A-Tardy, but they're still receiving a referral for every tardy. And the parents will write back to me and they're like, Yeah, sorry, it's my fault. They keep going to school because I have to take my younger one to school first. Hello, our school starts first, and then the other kids start school, and hello, bring your kid to school first. And so all we were talking about how some of it also falls on the parents, but I think also is we send a very, I think we send an amazing message, but we don't send it to the heart. California has done a great job of implementing CTE, and everyone does not have to go to college, right? That was our thinking before, and now we're like, we need some that we need someone to work everything. We need someone to be an electrician, a plumber, someone that's gonna be our landscaper, someone who is going to be a construction worker, someone who's gonna be a lawyer, someone who's going to be a teacher. And so we need all of these types of jobs. And so I think we do a good job of giving them opportunities, but because we're not accountable, then students struggle. And I think that's what it comes down to is these kids, there is no accountability. We haven't held account, we haven't held them accountable for at least five or six years. And so because we haven't, then it's really created that off my shoulder. Have a good day. Bye. So definitely, and I totally agree with them. And there's ton, I think Forbes last year wrote wrote an article about Gen Z and employment, and kids come late to interviews and their moms come with them. It's crazy. I'm gonna have to find it and send it to you guys. But we I we read it. My friend sent it to me, or I sent it to him, and we all talked about it. We all sat there and read it at lunch, and we're like, yes, this is real life. This is what we're experiencing right now. So, yes, it's awful. And uh, it starts at home. I think everything starts at home. It starts at home, and we have to learn as parents to take responsibility and not just say, Oh, my kid is going to school, now it's your job. We have to work together.

SPEAKER_01 38:57

Have you heard of these apps where students can either kind of like off-the-radar apps where they can rate high school teachers and then help each other figure out what classes to drop and things like that?

SPEAKER_00 39:08

Oh my god, yeah. They're not scared. They're high school students are not scared to talk about other teachers in front of you, they have no fear. Oh, you know what this teacher did? And or talk about their previous teachers. They are not scared to give you the lowdown.

SPEAKER_02 39:21

So you touched on COVID quite a bit. And along the lines of COVID and just students in general, I know Don and I have many friends whose children have experienced some type of anxiety. And can you talk to us about that as far as another layer of being a teacher?

SPEAKER_00 39:37

I had a student that used to come to school and she would like almost pee or poop on herself because she couldn't be in the classroom and her stomach was always hurting. That's how much it bothered her to be around people. She's definitely in an extreme situation, but I have students that do have social anxiety. And I think the part that's hard about that is that I don't know what triggers them. So they can sit in a classroom, but I don't know what will make them be triggered. And so that's the hard part about our job is if it doesn't say that on their paperwork, what triggers them, like with autism or with Asperger's, loud noises trigger them. But when it comes to social anxiety, everybody's so different that I would love to sit down and have a conversation, which probably is not very professional. So it's hard to do that. But I would love to have a conversation as to like how can I make sure that I'm supporting them and making sure I'm putting them in the right spot and making sure that I'm doing what they need so that social anxiety isn't a reason that they don't come to school.

SPEAKER_02 40:35

And then what about teaching the students around them how to be with them? Because you're just one person one-on-one. But what about the other 25, 30 students that are in the same room?

SPEAKER_00 40:45

So that's where like your culture, the culture you create in your classroom, that's where safety comes in. You have to have boundaries and you have to have restrictions and you have to, the students have to know how to behave and what's allowed in your classroom and what's not. So that's what that comes down to is knowing. So I have a student with Asperger's and he doesn't like loud noises and he despises the word six, seven, like the rest of us, but that really triggers him, makes him go in a rage. And he, so you have to know, and so at moments when he leaves, I have to tell my students this is what triggers him. Like when he speaks up, we have to listen and we have to lower our voices. And he came and he's in a class of 34. So having loud noises is difficult, and so or not trying not to have loud noises is difficult. So he does get to use his headphones. So there's things like that we can do for students, but some students they don't know how to advocate from themselves. But yeah, social anxiety is so hard. Kids never before COVID did we have psychologists on campus.

Anxiety, Suicide Risk, And School Power

SPEAKER_00 41:40

I think now we have four on campus when we've barely we shared one with our sister school before. We have an SRO on campus, we have counselor of the day, so we have six counselors, and there's a counselor of the day every day for any type of need that a student has, they're about to go to the counselor, and then from there they decide do we need to send them to the psychologist? Do we need to send them? We have this beautiful thing called the well, which is in our library, and it's just a cute little area. Um it's very calming and relaxing, and it has that soothing music, and you can go sit in there and you can do, you can color, you can do a crossword puzzle.

SPEAKER_01 42:12

What about have you seen increases in suicidal ideation or suicidality at school?

SPEAKER_00 42:18

Yes, yes. About a month ago, we had a student commit suicide. I didn't know who it was, but from what I've heard from other teachers, he wasn't at school very much, but he did struggle. And so there is definitely suicidal ideation, I think more often than I've ever seen since before COVID. It's definitely out there. I'm not sure if technology helps that with TikTok and social media and how that incorporates into their thinking. And then also AI, like when you talk to something on AI, it's talking to you in a manner that suits you. It's usually not talking to you, it's talking to you with facts, but it's also trying to break it down nicely to you and make you feel better about it. And so, you know, how in a sense, how is that helpful in times in times of need? And so we have to definitely find our balance with all of it and just keep getting the message out that we're here. And if you need something, if we can't help you, we'll find someone who will. I think that's the message that sometimes we're so busy doing everything that we forget about that because those aren't the kids who are loud and proud. It's very rare that the students who have that ideation, those usually aren't those students. It's usually the quiet students, the students that didn't stick out, and those. So we have to find ways to meet them and we have to find ways to get them, to get them to come and speak out and to use their voice. Of course.

SPEAKER_02 43:35

Would you say school districts protect students or protect teachers? Students. Definitely students.

SPEAKER_00 43:42

They protect students. I feel more than that, especially during after COVID, it's been a student goes in and says something and then it's rarely a conversation with the teacher. It's an email that I need to see you in my office, yada yada, yada. Or this occurred. And it's just wait, let's have a conversation because. You obviously didn't get the whole story. And it's I feel like they're very quick to react. And because they do that, then it really affects the ability to it affects our ability to have a good relationship. So why didn't you come to me first rather than throwing out this email to everybody? And now you're making a fool out of yourself. With the Hispanic culture, people don't want their kids to be labeled.

SPEAKER_03 44:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 44:21

So we we find a lot of kids in high school who don't have IAPs or 504s when they should. And as teachers, we can fight with them, fight for them as much as we can, but if parents don't agree to it, then we're at a loss. So that's where we have to come in as teachers and be like, okay, you get to use your notes, or you get extra time today, or we'll figure out a time for you to finish your test. That's definitely something that's tough in here where I live. And one thing is our union is very strong in California. Our unions are super strong. So even if kids, not kids with I IEPs and 504s, but just any student, if they complain to the principal and the principal wants to do something about it, we have a very strong union where it's unless the teacher really does something bad like crazy. I think we're very we're supported very well by our union and we're secure in a sense.

SPEAKER_02 45:08

Thank you so much for sharing such great stories. And I'm pretty sure D and I would love to be in your class as students if we had the chance to. We cannot do math, however. We can't do math.

SPEAKER_01 45:19

We'd be the we are all math people.

SPEAKER_00 45:21

We are all math people.

SPEAKER_01 45:23

I'm not a math person.

SPEAKER_00 45:25

I have a poster in my classroom that says, I love math that makes people cry. That's front and center on my backdrop in my classroom. So true. But yeah, I teach my I teach like I teach financial algebra. We do something every day that alludes to real life, and the kids are like, I don't want to be an adult. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 45:44

Adulting's hard. Adulting is hard. Adulting is hard. It is not for the weekend. Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 45:48

So thank you so much for being such a great guest on our show today. For all our listeners, I'm sure you have been inspired, and who knows, maybe we'll get a couple of teachers out of you. So with that, we want to thank you for sharing your story with us. You've officially joined the ranks of the brave and the bold.

Final Thoughts And Listener Invitation

SPEAKER_01 46:07

That's it for this week's confession. We've laughed, cringed, and maybe questioned our own career choices.

SPEAKER_02 46:14

Big thanks to our anonymous guests for keeping it real and reminding us that behind every job title is a story worth telling. If you've got a workplace confession of your own, we're all ears. Hit us up at our email address. And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and share. Your support helps us keep the secrets flowing.

SPEAKER_01 46:31

Until next time, keep your badge clipped, your coffee strong, and your stories wild. This is Workplace Confessions Behind Closed Doors.