May 21--3 Simple Steps For Improving Your Relationships and Mental Health

Having healthy relationships and a healthy mind can be difficult areas to navigate, but the tips in today's passages work like shortcuts to your destination:  1 Samuel 29-31, John 11:45-57, Psalm 117, Proverbs 15:24-25.

Eve reads her Bible journal aloud on this episode.

Click here for the FREE Yearly Bible Reading Plan she uses.  

Transcript

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May twenty one three simple steps for improving your relationships and mental health. I won't be reading the scripture references. For those, please check the written post. I began fraying around the edges. It was day three of our first cousin's camp, and I'd averaged about that many hours of sleep per night, for real. When Bang didn't want to wear the long sleeve shirt I'd brought for hiking craggy gardens, I felt tempted to strangle him with it just to make sure he took it. Step back, I told myself, don't lose it. If he gets cold, he'll learn. I put it in my backpack and later he asked for it. I'm a naturally tidy, especially for camp with eight young boys, and the mess began getting to me. Let's pick up, I hollered when we got back to the house, and everybody scrambled. Rafin Ransom, age three, helped best. Ezra was picking up his clothes when I tossed him a shirt that smacked him square in the face. Hey, I don't like that, he complained, with his dirty shoes on the counter beside the ground beef. All I cared about was what I didn't like. I didn't like what you did, ma'am, he repeated. Oh come on, I thought. It was just a shirt. It didn't hurt. You're seven for goodness sake. But what I said was, Well, I don't like your dirty shoes on the counter by our burgers, which got us nowhere, of course. After supper, Ez sat at the end of the sofa farthest away from me, not close as he had other nights. He didn't tell a story like he did the night before. He was quiet getting to bed, which wasn't like him. I could explain that he misunderstood me. I didn't mean to hit his face, and I wasn't trying to hurt him, but his heart would still feel heavy. Unacknowledged, he'd have to pack it up and carry it by himself. The slight would linger between us like a smell you can't get rid of. Would I care about how he felt? Did I care? I had to think a minute, and I asked God for help. Suddenly, the love was right there. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings before supper with that shirt. I care about how you feel, Ezie. It must have felt crummy, like I don't care at all. That's okay, ma'am. I forgive you. And just like that the sun came out. He visibly brightened. Later he asked if we could snuggle. This is what Cousin's camp was about for me. It wasn't mainly about having fun, though we were having plenty. It wasn't about tasting freedom, though we were bending rules and stomping them. It wasn't really about the stories we were telling or the memories we were making either. It was about doing life together, messing up and forgiving. It was caring how the other person felt and not just about myself. It was learning to love my people even when I didn't want to. Today's passages tell more about how to improve your relationships and mental health.

1 Samuel 29-31

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The Old Testament chapters are first Samuel twenty nine to thirty one. David and his men have been hiding out in Philistia from Saul's henchmen playing the part of loyal servants to Achish, the king, who's given them the town of Ziklag to live in. When they come home from some out of town business for Akish, they discover Ziklag's been burned and their wives and children taken captive by the Amalekites. They're so broken hearted they weep and wail, and they even talk of stoning David for it. Rather than let the rumor mill beat him, David quote, strengthened himself with trust in his God, end quote. He ordered the priest to bring the Ephod so he can ask what he should do next. God said they can save their families if they go after them, so with hope in their hearts and talk of stoning silenced, they headed out. But some of the men were too exhausted from the errand they'd been on for Akish, and along with their grief over losing their families, they just couldn't keep up. They stayed behind with the supplies while the rest went on. When the fighters returned with the people and plunder, some of the rifraff among them said the resters can have their families back, but not any loot, though there was more than enough to share with multiple cities in Judah. David said nothing doing. God was gracious to protect them on their mission, so they recovered everybody, plus everything the Amalekites had taken from other communities. Those who waited would share equally with the fighters. No one would be kept from enjoying God's bounty because of resting. This is yet another story in the Bible where David led by trusting what God said rather than what men said. When his followers maligned and accused him for the loss of their families, David wasn't undone. He didn't let his lack of popularity dictate what he did. He commanded grace for those who couldn't earn anything because God had been gracious first. Surely the rabble eventually respected David for the way he decided it, because as it turned out, it was the best choice for everybody. Their families were returned and they were loaded down with loot to boot. David models how a relationship with God should work. He leads and we follow, he commands and we obey. This is what fearing God looks like. Unlike David, Saul wanted to please men rather than God. He even confessed this fault in himself to the prophet Samuel. God said he would tear his kingdom away from Saul and give it to David because Saul listened to what others expected rather than what God said. David's fear of God colored the way he treated Saul too. Though David had already been anointed by Samuel as Israel's next king, he wouldn't do anything to bring down Saul prematurely, even though his men urged him to do it. When Saul chased him, when he was hated by his followers, when his family was taken, David looked to God and asked him for help. He trusted God to keep his promise, and he waited for his timing to fulfill it. Fear of God is the most basic building block there is for the good life. There's quite a lot written about it in the Bible. Here are some highlights. Fear of God keeps you honest, keeps you out of your neighbor's business, keeps you kind when you're rejected. Fear of God also protects your kids, motivates you to mend fences, keeps you from idols, makes you successful. It even makes you wise and extends your life. Surprisingly, it's where the glory we all want lies. The benefits of fearing God just can't be overstated. But what do you do if you just can't muscle it up? Start by repenting for caring more about what everybody else wants instead of what God wants. Ask Him for help to keep His commands, even those you don't like, repeat as necessary, and prepare to be astonished. Step one Fear God to improve your relationships and mental

John 11:45-57

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health. The New Testament passages John eleven forty five to fifty seven. Jesus polarizes people. After he raised Lazarus, many Jews believed in him, but some ran to tell the Pharisees what he'd done, and they were livid. The Pharisees and other religious leaders at the temple were afraid that everyone would believe in Jesus, and if they did, these leaders would lose the privileges Rome gave them. Caiaphas, the Jewish high priest, prophesied that Jesus would die to save the Jewish nation, so all Israel would be united. From that day on he and his cronies determined they'll kill Jesus to bring about the fulfillment of that prophecy, only they didn't know how cryptic a deed it would be. They'd murder the Messiah they'd been anticipating for two thousand years, who would unite the whole world and not just Israel. When you really understand who Jesus is, you either love him or hate him because Jesus' Savior is downright offensive. Having a savior assumes that people need saving and nobody wants to admit it, at least not saving badly, not hopelessly, not desperately for goodness sake. I said this same thing yesterday. We'd rather do the opposite, prove our goodness, our relevance, our cleanness, our coolness. Who wants to say I'm a screw up, I can't do life by myself? Not me. But it's the truth, and it's exactly what we must do, and when you do, Jesus stops being a bother and becomes beloved to you. I have to admit, I need Jesus all day long, and it's humbling as heck. Whether it's overeating or oversharing or overspending or overindulging, I have to confess I'm on the bottom and can't fix myself again. But that's where I find Jesus, and finding Jesus is worth what it costs me. It's also where I find compassion and kindness for others who struggle like I do. Step two humble yourself and go to Jesus to improve your relationships and mental health

Psalm 117, Prayer, Proverbs 15:24-25

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from Psalm one hundred seventeen. This pithy Psalm of only two verses and less than thirty words puts God's plan for all people in a nutshell. His love and faithfulness never end, so everybody, everywhere, praise him. It's not God's holiness that's highlighted here or our need to measure up. The focus is on God's faithful love for everyone. And this is good news because who can ever measure up? God's love, quote, has taken over our lives, end quote, and transformed us into worshipers who praise Him. And praise is the magic pill we can take anytime we want to break from our duties, our drudgeries, our depressions. Praise pulls you out of yourself and lands you right in God's throne room where the party never stops and you're the beloved guest. Who can resist the God who never stops loving us? Who can resist the person who's changed by God's love and loves like He does? This unbelievably good news is for anyone who will believe it. Step three, praise God to improve your relationships and mental health prayer. God, you know all that I am and all that I'm not. Thank you for words that untangle my knots and sticky spots. Thank you for Jesus, my Savior, who keeps riding in to rescue me. In Jesus' name, so be it. From Proverbs 15, 24 to 25. God raises up the lowly and smashes the lofty. He upends arrogance and stands with the humble. For the rest of the story of Cousins Camp, click the link at the end of this written post. The passages in 1 Samuel, John, Psalms, and Proverbs are selected for today in the yearly Bible. This is Eve de Bartleaban, Robuk.