Jojo On The Go
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Jojo On The Go
The Cast Breaks The News - Ep. 39
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Jagger produces a segment that has Jana delivering news stories. It doesn't go well.
Hey, I'm Bailey. I'm Ashley from Goldfreaks, Florida, and you're listening to Jojo on the go.
SPEAKER_01Live from the Holiday Pools and Spa studios, presented by Pizza Knight Altoona. This is Jojo on the go.
SPEAKER_02Oh man, it's Monday. I mean, yay. Happy Monye. Monye.
SPEAKER_04Don't you ever do that again?
SPEAKER_06You know, usually I love a Monday because it's that fresh start, you're getting that boost of energy. Okay, okay, we're in a new place. But today is a different day. I feel like I feel like you're meant to be just like, yeah.
SPEAKER_04I'm sick of your hippie bullshit already.
SPEAKER_06Then I'm not gonna talk about it being 420, that's for sure.
SPEAKER_04Oh yeah. All right.
SPEAKER_06That hypes you up. You've obviously never done weed before because it definitely does not give you energy like that.
SPEAKER_02Done the weed.
SPEAKER_06Done the weed. Smoke of the crack.
SPEAKER_04I've never had a marijuana cigarette.
SPEAKER_06Really? No. I mean, don't start now. You're about to be 50. There's no point.
SPEAKER_04Not time to start new things.
SPEAKER_06I don't think so. Hence what we're doing here. Look, sink and ship. You really want to go further? 2 a.m.
SPEAKER_02Oh God. It is 2 a.m.
SPEAKER_06Did you see my cat just popping into the frame?
SPEAKER_02Keep it in the frame. Is that the thing you were screaming at, Lolly? Before we started? Lolly.
SPEAKER_06Get out of here. She actually, when we first adopted her, her name was Twizzler, and I'm like, who names the cat Twizzler?
SPEAKER_04The Lolly's better?
SPEAKER_06Lollipop, it's a cute name. I'm sorry, Times.
SPEAKER_04I enjoy your muscle milk. All I hear is stop naming your cat after things in Villa.
SPEAKER_06You'd rather me drink this than chew.
SPEAKER_02Chew? Are you a baseball player now?
SPEAKER_06My kid actually just started wanting gum. Chew? So I bought her bubblegum the other day for the first time because she tried my gum and she was like gross. Too spicy. Cool. Nicotine. I got her bubblegum and she like takes one bite of it and she's like, I don't like it. I was like, that's good. I'm I'm happy about that.
SPEAKER_02My daughter didn't let my nick wreck.
SPEAKER_06I was wondering why she kept smoking still. It's because she won't take gum.
SPEAKER_02Someone give her a patch. Ah, these kids, they don't listen. I saw another podcast clip where uh one guy asked the other, what sound do you hate? And he said, The sound of children playing. And I said, You know what? You're right. I don't like that sound either. It's not like I don't like the sound of joy, it's the screaming and just the I don't know.
SPEAKER_06It is pretty incredible how people are very quick to criticize parents, right? Like, you always do this, or you're such a uh screamer at your children, or you don't give them enough, or you give them too much, blah, blah, blah. And then I'm like, but we all are in the mutual agreement that kids suck, right?
SPEAKER_07They do.
SPEAKER_06That's what everybody's talking about. So how are we nitpicking over X, Y, and Z?
SPEAKER_04And they only get worse as they get older. Adult kids are the worst. And then they stop talking to you. Yes.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, it took my dad like many years of uh saying, like, yeah, parenthood does get better when they move out of your house and leave you alone.
SPEAKER_04I like how JoJo doesn't like the sound of kids playing yet. He's DJing for them every other week now.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, talk about a hypocrite. Gee.
SPEAKER_02Can't hear him behind 16 speakers.
SPEAKER_06How'd it go? He 420s himself every time he goes. But yeah. How was it? Because now you've moved up from kindergarten to preteen.
unknownI know.
SPEAKER_02I get I get the uh the seniors now. Um I'm big time.
SPEAKER_06Seniors? Yeah. Jagger had the seniors.
SPEAKER_02No, senior citizens. That's what he got. He goes to Shady Maples. I go to Shady Acres High School. It's true.
SPEAKER_06It's all shady.
SPEAKER_04I saw the video of Boopy trying to land the plane in the gymnasium. That was awesome.
SPEAKER_02Oh yeah. We hand it out. See, my little trick is I hand out glow sticks at the dances. So even if everyone's just standing there, it looks like they're having a good time because the things blink. So it looks like a huge party. So my wife decides she's one of the fly girls from Mad TV. When she gets up there, she starts.
SPEAKER_06So how did the crowd take that?
SPEAKER_02They took it well. Like I pulled a risky move. I whipped out Quad City DJs the train and said, Han, you're the uh you're the first person on the train. Get them to do it. Go. And they all did it. It was incre I don't think they knew what they were doing, but uh see that's what Iceberg Senior High School.
SPEAKER_06I feel like if we go to a dance, or we don't, but if we go to an event, you put on that song, everybody goes wild because we never hear it anymore. The kids, they're hearing it for the first time, which is insanity.
SPEAKER_02There were some other songs that that I knew and you guys would know from like the early 2000s that when we played them, the kids went insane.
SPEAKER_06Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And then it puzzled me as to why. And then I figured it's probably just TikTok making the song cool again in a viral video.
SPEAKER_06That tends to be it now.
SPEAKER_04Right. Well, too, it's uh what their parents listened to, so to them it's the oldie, so it's nostalgia, I guess maybe.
SPEAKER_02I mean, but it is a Kaja Goo. Wow. Kaja Goo.
SPEAKER_07Kaja Goo.
SPEAKER_02Back when music was good. Jagger, you were on a tiki boat with some of our listeners last uh Wednesday, as I knew before we started recording. That's right. That's right.
SPEAKER_04How'd that go? It was wonderful. We had uh 14 total uh listeners on board, plus me and my plus one. Was it supposed to be a hundred? Yeah, it was no, that was full. That was full capacity.
SPEAKER_06I was gonna say, what was the weight limit on that?
SPEAKER_04Uh uh shut up. Anyway. So wonderful tiki boat. It was full capacity. We had a great time. Sunset cruise. We saw dolphins, schools of dolphins, just nice majestic. Oh, it was beautiful. We had dead deer delicious charcuterie from the board chef. Uh Destined Private Tiki. Uh, Destin Private Tiki, Captain Matt took us out. Nice. And we had a great time. Yeah. It looked beautiful.
SPEAKER_02Thank them for putting up with Jagger.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, they were engaged. They were willing to play uh some reindeer games with me.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, speaking of reindeer games, what the hell is what does JoJo look like? I mean, because that's on my screen right now to ask you about. What did you do to me?
SPEAKER_04I just thought it would be funny to find out what people thought who you look like. Like some celebrity doppelganger.
SPEAKER_06Oh, no, I was thinking more so like when we were on radio, no one necessarily knew who we'd look like, so they would meet us and be like, oh.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. That's what you look like. Yeah, I was like, oh.
SPEAKER_04You got some good compliments, though. Who?
SPEAKER_06Okay, do tell.
SPEAKER_04I did.
SPEAKER_06This is celeblocal. I love a doppelganger. I go anywhere I go, if I see someone that looks like someone else, I have to point it out to them.
SPEAKER_02I love that game. It's so fun. Can we watch and listen to this clip and then come back and discuss how Jagger's wronged me yet again? Go ahead.
SPEAKER_00What celebrity does JoJo look like?
SPEAKER_03What celebrity does Jojo look like? And I hope that more like this Rimmel. Danny Bonaduc. What celebrity does JoJo look like?
SPEAKER_00Um maybe a little Bradley Cooper?
SPEAKER_03What celebrity does Jojo look like? Oh, the uh knock him in the middle version of Brian Cradley. What celebrity does Jojo look like?
SPEAKER_05Oh my gosh. Uh don't take offense. I think he looks like Buffalo Bill.
SPEAKER_03What celebrity does Jojo look like?
SPEAKER_00Walter White.
SPEAKER_03We don't what celebrity does JoJo look like? Don't cabolta in the younger year? What celebrity does JoJo look like?
SPEAKER_00Uh funny a little yeah.
SPEAKER_03What celebrity does JoJo look like?
SPEAKER_02I would say uh David Spade.
SPEAKER_00What celebrity does JoJo look like?
SPEAKER_02Alright, so I uh couldn't listen. I was so mad. Why are you mad? You got compliments.
SPEAKER_04Who do people say I look like? How about Bradley Cooper? That's a good one. Oh, that's exactly right.
SPEAKER_06Sorry, are you high today?
SPEAKER_04Um I said I nailed it. You got two Brian Cranstons, one knockham in the middle, one Walter White.
SPEAKER_02It depends on how much I shaved. Oh man. That's good. That's good. All right, so far so.
SPEAKER_06I haven't seen him in real life, so right.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, so I just showed that picture that you're talking about. No, saying I I just showed them the same picture, all the same picture you saw on there that was uh the side by side. How much wine they have before you asked them. A good bit. Yeah. A good bit. That's why you got John Travolti younger years. The answers were more in my favor.
SPEAKER_06You know, I will say, and especially now, Jojo, you're working remote. I was recently at a leadership conference where I met all my coworkers for the first time. And seeing people that you only interact with on Teams or Zoom is wild. They we were actually making count of okay, so how many people here actually look like what we assumed they would? Because people would run up to me like they knew immediately who I was. There were so many people that I would meet, and I didn't know who they were until I looked at their name tag or they started talking because they just genuinely don't look like not even their photo on on Teams, but what they look like on camera. And I'm like, how does it not translate? I don't understand. We're in 2026.
SPEAKER_02Well, they got all these filters now. This is Insta Famous for were Teams famous.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I guess that's what it is.
SPEAKER_02I I just stand out like a sore thumb.
SPEAKER_06Stand out like a sore banana.
SPEAKER_02I'll tell you what, I spend most of the day now on Teams, and it's just everyone's in a little box, and it's this whole don't stand up because you have pajamas on, even though you're like dressed appropriately from the time. Everyone else is dressed appropriately.
SPEAKER_06No, because you you missed the wave, right, of starting fully remote. Because back when it was 2020, everyone was doing what you're doing. But now people are like, No, I still need to get myself ready in the morning. I need to have a 45-minute routine. I gotta do my hair, I gotta do my makeup, I gotta like put they're putting like shoes on. Why? You're at home.
SPEAKER_02No, eventually they won't even see my face, so it's even better.
SPEAKER_06I still don't know what you're seeing now is what I'm going to work in, so for for the uh hour that we're recording this, she looks more made up than the rest of us.
SPEAKER_02Thanks. I literally I rolled out a message.
SPEAKER_04I don't know. I I'm looking pretty good today.
SPEAKER_07I woke up like this.
SPEAKER_04Don't lie. That's why I cover up the top of my head. So you don't want to see that.
SPEAKER_06But see, that that to me is confusing, right? Because like you wear a hat and then you show up to a leadership conference. If you had no hat on, people will be like, Who is that?
SPEAKER_02Who's that balding gentleman? Hey, I heard Janet does news now on the podcast. Yeah? Yeah. Do we have a special intro? Let's do it.
SPEAKER_06Well, I should tell you guys that I do have an actual degree in broadcast journalism, and I started off one. I'm so glad I could I didn't do news because the tone that I would have as I would read these things on my college radio was just so not me. I was like, this is painful to do. But anyway, if you want to hear just about some. Yeah, really gonna knock it out of the park. Um, no, but seriously, what I like about this is we're talking relatable news here, right? You know, like just Joe Schmoe's on the street, having a dandy old time, causing a ruckus. So this first one came out of baseball, right? We're in the middle of baseball season or the starting of an MLB player proposed to his girlfriend right on the field.
SPEAKER_02The major league baseball player is Joe Schmoe.
SPEAKER_06No, no, there's more it's about the audience. I need to live. I'm sorry. I need to live in the street. So an MLB player proposed to his girlfriend right on the field after a game. You don't hear about that. That's a very public announcement, but like doing it in your job, that's interesting. So the entire stadium was still watching there. They shut everything down. They they closed uh you know the doors, they said you're not entitled to leave yet. Brought her out, full crowd, cameras, the whole moment. It wasn't just a quick thing, it like turned into a post-game experience. It was on like all of the sports uh networks and stuff. So it was pretty cool for everyone that was there.
SPEAKER_04Well, that's kind of putting her on the spot, is it not? Like, how's she gonna say no in that environment?
SPEAKER_06No, what I didn't say is I would have hated that, and I'm sure there was a conversation afterwards, like I really wanted to.
SPEAKER_02I misunderstood this segment. I I thought it was like stupid people, so at the end, I thought it was like, then she threw it, hit it pie, threw him right in the face.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, no, that that'd be cool. It's just a nice story. Do you want me to just make things?
SPEAKER_02That was a weed Jagger.
SPEAKER_06I just watched the new Mark Norman comedy special, and I love an improv, so should I just whip him out?
SPEAKER_02No, you did very well. It's just that Jagger just spits something into chat GPT, and maybe your brable.
SPEAKER_06You know what's ironic? He just spits it into chat GPT, wants us to do it, but he still hasn't done his comedy routine.
SPEAKER_02I actually I'm on your team here. I I think it's ridiculous that I think you can both go to hell.
SPEAKER_06You know what? This is gonna be a one-time segment, but I'll keep going if you want. No, screw it. I don't want to do it as well. A man was arrested after using an AI-generated video to prank a deputy. I'm just gonna put it out there. Probably not a great idea to start, but he showed the video as if it were real. It ended up being treated as evidence. And so it wasn't a prank. It was like actually where law enforcement had to get involved in it. So uh again, we're taking AI way too seriously at this point.
SPEAKER_02It's too late. Okay.
SPEAKER_06I don't have to continue.
SPEAKER_02I mean AI.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, no, yeah, we're done here.
SPEAKER_02Can't put that genie back in the bottle.
SPEAKER_06No.
SPEAKER_02Jagger's using it every two seconds to make the planet expire faster.
SPEAKER_04Well, when you have one person producing this show, one with all of you.
SPEAKER_07Hey, we did have another, but then he ends up getting a real job.
SPEAKER_02I have a meets I have to be at or teams, whatever. It's a teams. There's like 14 more stories here. I don't I wouldn't want to waste Jagger's time asking chat GPT to do anything.
SPEAKER_06Well, you know what is funny though? It it is kind of ironic how back in the day someone puts a lot of work into something, and and if you're not like a shitty human or boss, you're not gonna say to them, Oh, you did all this effort, here, take this away, blah, blah, blah. But like here, we can say to him, Oh, take this away, because you really didn't put that much effort in, you plugged it into Chat GPT.
SPEAKER_04Except for what you plebeians don't know is that you have to you have to massage Chat GPT. I have spent a lot of time to get it to a format that works for this show and your tone and our retorts.
SPEAKER_06If you think this is in line with our show, I think I I think I clicked the wrong meeting.
SPEAKER_02Good. Is that fitter tone? An MLB player proposed to his girlfriend, the woman who hates love.
SPEAKER_06You know what? I'm offended.
SPEAKER_02I mean, love's love.
SPEAKER_06You know what? It's already bad enough. Everywhere I'm seeing on social media people celebrating 40th birthdays for the love of their lives, throwing them all these parties, everybody's getting pregnant, everybody's getting married, blah, blah, blah. You know, I could never even get my ex-husband to like give me a lovey-dovey post because he's like, all you care about is public affection. I was like, no, just any sort of acknowledgement. That's so far from the truth.
SPEAKER_02It's like doing a podcast with Elizabeth Taylor. God rest your soul, the dead version.
SPEAKER_04Their hearts are just as cold.
SPEAKER_02Speaking of death, I had one day off yesterday, and I chose to spend like two hours watching Reels in bed on Facebook, and I got into this vortex where it kept showing me clips of Neil deGrasse Tyson telling everyone how life doesn't exist and why that's true.
SPEAKER_06Oh, he's intense.
SPEAKER_02Why did I get these clips all of a sudden? I get one day off, and it's this is what I get with my time.
SPEAKER_06Might be one of the smartest humans ever, but like if you actually take what he says to heart, it's deep and way beyond my mental capacity.
SPEAKER_02He's either the smartest or the dumbest, and he has us all fooled, which would also make him the smartest.
SPEAKER_06Exactly. How do you become an astrophysicist unless you are somewhat smart? I guess you can be kniving too. I feel like Jagger will become an astrophysicist as soon as he plugs it into ChatGPT to like pitch it to someone.
SPEAKER_04I'm gonna plug in your desk to Chat GPT.
SPEAKER_06You're plotting my murder.
SPEAKER_04Yes.
SPEAKER_06I mean, no. Sounds like a paper trail to me.
SPEAKER_05I'm not gonna lie.
SPEAKER_06I'm not gonna lie. I I don't by any means necessarily fear for my life every moment of every day. However, I did install a security camera. Also, I might have given somebody a note saying, hey, if for some reason I go missing, or if a tragic accident happens to me, I don't just die of natural causes. Here's a list of people I'm pretty sure might have contributed.
SPEAKER_04The list of one.
SPEAKER_02Not me. I'm too lazy.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, you would never you know it's funny because I'm I'm deeply into these true crime stories, and I find like when they go through their computer and and they literally Google how to four forms like compose a body. How do you not think you're gonna get caught somehow?
SPEAKER_02That's crazy.
SPEAKER_06I know. People are dumb.
SPEAKER_02I don't know what happened to her. And how come it says how do you roll a body and carpet on your Google search?
SPEAKER_06Well, don't you want to know? Oh, my Google searches look so different than that. You know what? I could probably read you my my last five searches on um Gemini. I'm gonna I'm gonna look at them first.
SPEAKER_04Good Lord, are you alright?
SPEAKER_02You guys didn't hear that, did you? No.
SPEAKER_04We saw it. It looked like you were throwing up a demon.
SPEAKER_06Okay, okay, so this is funny. This is actually funny. So a lot of this is just typical. Uh my last five searches mortgage decision, stay or downsize. Then again, next search, downsizing condo math, rate dilemma.
SPEAKER_02Downsizing condoms.
SPEAKER_06Number three, taking things personally, a balance. Number four, New York separation agreement, uh custody, something. And then number five, making broccoli sprouts, root hairs versus mold.
SPEAKER_02Our Janna leads a very diverse life.
SPEAKER_06I was gonna say, uh, I'm a lady of many talents.
SPEAKER_04Would you like to hear my top five chat GPT? Yes, I do. All right. So the latest one was comedy news rundown. And then came Jana's problem. Podcast topic ideas. Instead of thinking of any. 18 gauge versus 23 gauge. Oh god.
SPEAKER_06Wait, I was looking up gun stuff yesterday too.
SPEAKER_04No.
SPEAKER_06I was looking up how to like clean and dismantle a gun, and if there's a jam, what to do.
SPEAKER_04Well, this was actually about needles, but whatever.
SPEAKER_06Oh, my bad.
SPEAKER_02Why do I see the ID channel logo on this clip?
SPEAKER_04Uh St. Louis the Destined Flights. Okay. And hotels near mobile. I mean mobile. Bars.
SPEAKER_06Mo mobile gas station.
SPEAKER_04Mobile, Alabama.
SPEAKER_06Mobile. Oh man. So did you book a trip?
SPEAKER_04Not yet. No. So we are going to go to so there's a Chinese lantern fest and festival in Bellingrath, Alabama. Uh so we're going to go check that out and it's near Mobile.
SPEAKER_06So eco-friendly. I'm glad you're going.
SPEAKER_04The Chinese part or the lantern part?
SPEAKER_06The lantern part. They send up I mean, I know that they're paper, but like, are they biodegradable?
SPEAKER_04They're not floating them up in the air. They're not doing it. So it's Bellingrath Gardens and they have like a beautiful gardens and a home and a light show. So it's more of a light show. They're not floating anything up.
SPEAKER_06Oh, okay, okay. Because that it was always confusing to me how uh we're in this age about like, oh my god, global warming, and yet we're still sending stuff into the ether.
SPEAKER_02We call it climate change now.
SPEAKER_06Oh, is that offensive? I'm telling you, a lot of these things that we're talking about, there's references that were in the Mark Norman comedy. You gotta watch it.
SPEAKER_02She was gonna say the Bible.
SPEAKER_06It was one of the funniest uh stand-ups I've seen in a long time. Funnier as a magazine.
SPEAKER_02Mark Norman.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, he's like a huge comic. Are you kidding me?
SPEAKER_02We better be because I'm gonna look him up after this. He's so funny.
SPEAKER_06You'll really enjoy him. Even just look up a clip first.
SPEAKER_04He has a little bit of a Norr McDonald flair for me, I think. And you know what?
SPEAKER_06It's one of his favorites.
SPEAKER_02I'm just hearing about him today a lot.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, he's great. Really great.
SPEAKER_02Evidently, Jenna likes him, and we should watch it. You think she likes him? Well, you know what I've seen. Well, she told you you'd love it. I thought you guys had some bond over this comedian. You just didn't want to even include my name in that.
SPEAKER_06I mean, you're not funny.
SPEAKER_02She was like, Jagger, you've got to check out Norm McDonald or whatever. Oh, wait, he's um whatever she said. Ryan, who's the comedian? Ronald McDonald.
SPEAKER_05Mark Norm. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So she leaves me out of it, so I'm thinking like he already knows who that is. He does. I know who it is, yeah. I just haven't seen it yet. Yeah. Are you are you excited? That's how I knew he had a Norm McDonald flair. Stick with us. Are you excited to see it?
SPEAKER_04You look really excited.
SPEAKER_06That's just his face. Stop being offensive.
SPEAKER_04And she didn't include you in it because she knows you hate everything. So why even suggest it?
SPEAKER_02I like comedians. Too bad I don't work with any.
SPEAKER_04Oh my god. It's a brutal Monday. I need a 420 break.
SPEAKER_06You know, speaking of Mondays, though, the day before Monday is what class?
SPEAKER_04Crying. Wishing it were Saturday.
SPEAKER_06Sunday. And, you know, soon enough it's gonna be the weekend again. If you want a Sunday special, if you don't feel like cooking before the new week starts, go over to Pizza Night over on Beale Avenue. Any large one topping pizza, only $8.99, both carryout and delivery. So you wait, how much?
SPEAKER_04Yeah, what?
SPEAKER_06$899. Unheard of in my book.
SPEAKER_04That's like a dollar away.
SPEAKER_06So if you want to make it a pizza night, give them a call, 814-943-7000.
SPEAKER_02That's $814-943-7000. How much of a tip do I have to give if they deliver to Navarre, Florida?
SPEAKER_06Probably more than $8.99, even. Yeah. Pizza's gonna be the cheapest part. I'm gonna have to live in a trailer soon enough. No offense.
SPEAKER_02I lived in a trailer when I was a kid. It was fine, and I loved it.
SPEAKER_06Trailer Park Boys is one of my favorite shows of all time.
SPEAKER_02Yes, that's exactly what it is.
SPEAKER_06It really does to me. I don't know if this is the point of it. It does glamorize living in a trailer for me.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, but bubbles is cancelled now.
SPEAKER_06Oh, I know. You got me into that show ten years ago.
SPEAKER_02Thank you. I didn't I thought you'd go the opposite way of anything I recommended, but it's nice to hear that you you pick something.
SPEAKER_06Yeah. The one and only. One and only. Oh no, I I don't do reality TV really. The only reality TV, I mean, you're probably gonna hate me for this, is like I would watch either like the Vanderpump Rules or the Kardashians because it is so it is so out there and so not anything I would ever be able to experience or relate to in life that it just kind of separates you from the sadness of your life.
SPEAKER_02Well, how about this? 8148. What's the relevancy? 3038 sadness cleaning.
SPEAKER_04What is this? Bad Seg Monday?
SPEAKER_02Uh yes. Triluna Royal Cleaners also needs employees. So, you know how they say nobody wants to work anymore? Prove them wrong. Call Triluna Royal Cleaners right now at 814-895-3038. Back to you, Jana.
SPEAKER_06I got nothing.
SPEAKER_04Well, I was I was gonna say how much I love Tom Sandoval from Vanderpump Rules and everything that he's doing.
SPEAKER_06Are you serious?
SPEAKER_04I'm a big Tom fan. Love it. What I want to get him, I'm trying to get him on the show to be honest with you.
SPEAKER_06Oh my god. I don't even know how I would react, honestly.
SPEAKER_04I'm working on some big guests. So you guys want to give me a hard time for checking this?
SPEAKER_06Are you just gonna spring them on us, though? Because like, what if I got strong opinions of them?
SPEAKER_02Just like Marion from Brooklyn, where a box just opens up while we're talking and she's just there.
SPEAKER_06If I want you to Sandoval, I'm gonna be like, what the is wrong with you?
SPEAKER_04Well, I can't wait. And he's gonna ask the same of you.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I hope he does.
SPEAKER_04We're gonna play who's the bigger train wreck, Jana or Tom Sandoval.
SPEAKER_06Honestly, that is funny.
SPEAKER_04And it's gonna be a close call.
SPEAKER_02Thanks. Oh man, we're roasty today.
SPEAKER_04He was on House of Villains, I've been watching. I'm actually going to watch a House of Villains. Have you seen that show?
SPEAKER_02I haven't because I don't do real hands.
SPEAKER_04My God, how many shows are you watching? All of them. That's why I don't have time to actually come up with my own ideas.
SPEAKER_02I think it's Hulu. Hulu.
SPEAKER_04Uh, and what's it about? So they take reality star villains and put them all in house and they do competitions to see who's the biggest villain on TV. Wow, groundbreaking television.
SPEAKER_06He's up there for sure.
SPEAKER_04He's good TV no matter what. But I am lit I'm legitimately working on trying to get him booked on the show.
SPEAKER_02Why? Because he's hilarious and great. Okay. I'm gonna be the odd man out for that interview.
SPEAKER_05He is you're the odd man out for every interview.
SPEAKER_04If it's not Chevy Chase, you don't want it.
SPEAKER_02Chevy Chase.
SPEAKER_04Or the kid from the Christmas story. You don't want it.
SPEAKER_02That's not true. It could be John Candy, but he's dead. Yeah. Well, I'll drag, I'll dick him up and drag his bones to your front door. You'll do it. They're not bones anymore. Take it easy. That was another reel that Facebook showed me. How long it takes to decompose was another Sunday morning uplifting special I got on Facebook.
SPEAKER_06Oh, I thought that was one of your searches. I was about to dial 911.
SPEAKER_02It sounded like you're in a rap song right there. 911.
SPEAKER_04I am working on Corey Feldman too, to be honest. That's who you want to do. Yes.
SPEAKER_06So let's let's one go already.
SPEAKER_04Well, let's talk about what you're doing for the show. How about that?
SPEAKER_06Um you know what's funny? Uh I feel like we're doing a do a disservice to kids because obviously we have cell phones, right? It's not like an old-fashioned phone where you could just pick it up and dial the number. So I'm in the age where trying to teach a kid how to dial 911 in case of an emergency. The hardest part isn't the dialing of the 911 and calling them. It's figuring out how to unlock the phone in order to do so. So I have to at least once a week say to her, Hey, can we practice calling 911? And she goes, No. I'm like, oh, I oh my God. And this is what this really ties in together. I didn't tell you guys what happened to me the other day where my kid almost needed to dial 911. I shit you not. So obviously. I'm the present parent, right? I'm a present parent. I'm constantly playing with my kid. I'm constantly chasing her, running around. We do sword fights, we dance multiple times a day.
SPEAKER_04Me and Jojo sword fight every now and then.
SPEAKER_06Oh glad I wasn't invited for that. Um so we're at the park. And she she has this thing where she loves to play tag and I chase her, but she doesn't let me go on the playground. I have to do it from the ground. So she's like wants me to stick my hands like all in the little cracks and like try and get her, and it's obviously dumb, but kids love it. So then I decided to mix it up and say, I'm gonna actually climb on the playground and start to like actually chase her. So I go to pull myself up on where like the monkey bar section is. I slam my head so hard on a metal bar, I instantly fall back. I felt my neck compress like this. I posted it on social media. It was so devastating. I'm not even telling. I laid there, two moms ran over to me and they're like, Are you okay? Oh my god, do we need to watch your kid? I'm just like, I'm good. I wasn't dizzy, my eyes weren't blurry or anything. Um, because I I can't see anyway, so it didn't make any difference. I literally, I still to this day, we're five days in. I can barely move my neck.
SPEAKER_02Um She doesn't know where she is.
SPEAKER_06It's been a really uh dandy time. I I can't run, I can't exercise. Yeah, no. Are you getting medical attention? No, I have not gone to see a doctor. What the hell?
SPEAKER_04One second. Let me look at chat GPT and see what it recommends for me.
SPEAKER_06That's what I did, and I'm I'm good as new.
SPEAKER_02Is that an ice situation or a heat situation? We can help you out. It's a mirror surgery situation.
SPEAKER_06I did ice the first night, and then the next day I did heat. I've been doing heat every day. I actually should have brought my heater up here because I'm in a lot of pain right now. I can't really look up. I can't turn my I can turn it, but it hurts. Um, but yeah, I'm I'm on the struggle bus.
SPEAKER_02We're gonna need you to wear a helmet next time you go on the playground.
SPEAKER_06That'd be a great idea. Well, I for one filled with empathy and sorry that you're my kid did say to me the the other day before we were riding bikes and she goes, Mom, why aren't you wearing a helmet? And I said, Yeah. That's accurate.
SPEAKER_04So I have an idea for you. So wear a helmet? No, no. So we went back to you how do we get kids to open the phone? Why don't you put her face as face recognition and she can just look at it and it'll open, she can call 911. She doesn't put it in a phone.
SPEAKER_06So weirdly enough, my my kid and I really do look alike, and there have been at least a handful of moments where she's looked at my phone and it has unlocked. So we gotta just hope for the best. That like in an emergency, it works then.
SPEAKER_04Wait, your daughter looks like a 45-year-old divorcee?
SPEAKER_02Oh, yeah, you see. And with that, everyone, well, thank you. I earned these lines, baby. Thanks for hanging out. I think we've covered it all. Don't forget, we've covered it. We've covered it all and nothing at the same time. What a train wreck. If you know someone in your area that's uh better than us, which is literally anyone, nominate them for uh parlor dough gooders right now. That's right. It could be a teacher, a nurse, a firefighter, it could be anyone but us, basically. Just go to the website uh jojoworldwide.com, click on doughgooders. If they win because of what you wrote about them, you get a gift card and they get uh a dozen delicious donuts from parlor donuts L Tuna. That's a win-win. On beat you and Jagger, on behalf of the two of you, obviously. I Jojo say goodbye and thank you for listening today. Thanks, Pizza Night. Thanks, holiday pools and spots. Happy 420. Whoever celebrates. Somebody please help me. Please help.
SPEAKER_08Jojo on the go is presented by Pizza Knight Altoona.
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SPEAKER_01A fresh new episode of JoJo on the go is coming soon from the Holiday Pools and Spa studios. In the meantime, head to JojoWorldwide.com for merchandise, mobile DJ services, bonus content, social media links, and even more ways to listen.