Episode 13: Being Different Isn't That Big of a Difference: Autism From a 9-Year-Old's Perspective

In this heartfelt episode, I interview my 9-year-old son, who has autism, as he shares what it’s like to experience the world in his own unique way. His perspective is honest, eye-opening, and full of insight that helps break down misconceptions about autism.

After our conversation, I reflect as a parent and discuss breaking the stigma around Autism Spectrum Disorder, the importance of early support, and practical steps families can take if they suspect their child may need help. This episode is about understanding, acceptance, and empowering parents to seek guidance early.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Hello, and welcome to the Brutiful Chaos with Kiki podcast. Hi, I'm Kiki, your host. Welcome to today's episode called Being Different Isn't That Big of a Difference. Autism from a Nine-Year-old's perspective. Today we're talking about autism, but more importantly, we're talking about what it's like to be different, how those differences can become strengths, and why understanding each other matters. My son recently wrote a song about his experience as well, so we're going to share that with you later in the episode. So grab your coffee, get comfortable, and let's dive right in. Today's a very special episode because I get to interview one of my favorite people in the whole world, my nine-year-old son, who we will call B-Dubs for privacy reasons. Welcome to the show, B-Dubs.

unknown 0:48

Hi.

SPEAKER_00 0:50

Before we start, do you want to tell everyone a little bit about yourself?

SPEAKER_01 0:54

As a nine-year-old child, I enjoy other hobbies like playing games and swimming.

SPEAKER_00 1:03

You also like singing and dancing and performing, which I think is amazing. Now let's talk a little bit about your autism. What does being autistic mean to you?

SPEAKER_01 1:15

Being autistic to me, I feel like so much like free will, so much things to do in the world, and so much different textures that I can touch and other stuff that can be sometimes overwhelming.

SPEAKER_00 1:30

That's an interesting way to explain it. Do you feel like your brain works differently than other people sometimes?

SPEAKER_01 1:37

Yes, of course I do, because I'm way different from other people because I've noticed that people go on flat feet and I go on my tippy toes, and and it's and I realized it's unnatural to do that.

SPEAKER_00 1:50

Interesting. Okay. So what are some things that you're really amazing at?

SPEAKER_01 1:54

I'm really amazing at helping people, giving people some opinions, like being kind to people, and like all sorts of different things.

SPEAKER_00 2:09

You are, and you're great at art and singing and performing and dancing. You have a lot of talents to be proud of. So now let's talk about the hard parts. What are some things that can feel really hard sometimes?

SPEAKER_01 2:22

It's when I feel like people are gossiping behind behind my back, and it feels like it's so stressful, and it feels so hard on me.

SPEAKER_00 2:33

So it sounds like you feel things very deeply emotionally. Do loud noises and crowds bother you too?

SPEAKER_01 2:40

It kind of does because at school at lunch it's always so crowded. There's so many loud noises, so I have to rest my head on my lunchbox so I don't have to hear that that much.

SPEAKER_00 2:53

Okay, and so what does it feel like when you get overwhelmed?

SPEAKER_01 2:57

It feels so stressful. It feels like I can't control my emotions, it's so hard to control everything, and I just feel so sad.

SPEAKER_00 3:06

I think that's important for people to hear because sometimes people don't realize how big feelings can feel in those moments. So let's talk about school and friends. What do you wish kids at school understood about autism?

SPEAKER_01 3:21

I wish they understood my my tiptoeing because they always make fun of my tiptoeing because of how they call me ugly because of my tiptoeing, and I'm trying to tell them, but they won't listen at all. So I wish that they could understand that.

SPEAKER_00 3:38

Thank you for sharing that, buddy. So, what helps you feel included or understood?

SPEAKER_01 3:44

It's when people actually understand how my feelings feel, and they actually understand me and try to talk things out like real friends.

SPEAKER_00 3:57

Do you ever feel misunderstood?

SPEAKER_01 3:59

Sometimes when I say something, it's basically gossiping, but I'm not trying to like gossip or anything. They always gaslight me and accuse me of everything.

SPEAKER_00 4:12

So if another child was listening right now that might be different or have autism, what would you tell them?

SPEAKER_01 4:18

I would tell them, great job for succeeding. You're not alone. There's people out there that have autism as well. So don't think that you're alone. We're with you.

SPEAKER_00 4:31

That's so nice, honey. So let's play a quick true or false game. Okay. Autistic kids don't have feelings. True or false?

SPEAKER_01 4:41

False.

SPEAKER_00 4:42

Autistic people can be really smart and creative. True. Being different is a bad thing.

SPEAKER_01 4:50

False.

SPEAKER_00 4:51

I agree with that completely. So, what is something you like about being autistic?

SPEAKER_01 4:56

It's the kindness that fills my heart.

SPEAKER_00 5:00

Okay. Yeah, I will say that is one amazing thing. You have the biggest heart and you give the best hugs in the whole wide world. Something else I like about you is I love the way that you see the world. I think you notice things that other people miss. Before we finish, is there anything else you want people to know about autism?

SPEAKER_01 5:16

Autism is me being so sensitive.

SPEAKER_00 5:22

That's right. You are sensitive to sounds, lights, emotions, and you get overstimulated easily. But sometimes the things that make us different actually become the very things that make us extraordinary. Well, thank you so much for being so brave and sharing your thoughts today. I'm really proud of you. I'm gonna let you get back to your games now, but I appreciate you coming on the podcast today. Bye. Before we wrap up today's episode, I want to talk about something that's really important to me as a mom. One of the reasons I wanted to have this conversation with B dubs is because I think we still have a long way to go when it comes to understanding autism. For some reason, there is still a stigma attached to being different. Some people are afraid of labels, some people worry about what others will think, some people hope their child will simply just grow out of certain challenges. But here's the thing: getting support is not giving up on your child. It's believing in them enough to help them succeed. If you're listening right now and you're wondering whether your child might be showing signs of autism, I just want to say you're not alone and it's okay to ask questions. Every child develops differently, but if you notice things like delays in speech, difficulty with social interactions, strong sensory sensitivities, or repetitive behaviors, it may be worth talking to a professional. The first step doesn't have to be overwhelming. You can simply start with your child's pediatrician and simply share your concerns. From there, they can guide you toward developmental screenings or specialists. There are so many early intervention services available in most areas, and they can evaluate children and provide support if needed. The earlier support starts, the more helpful it can be for building communication, social, and life skills. Some helpful resources people often use include autism organizations, local early intervention programs, and school-based evaluations for children under three in preschool. But the most important thing to remember is this seeking help doesn't label your child as less than. It opens doors to understanding them better. If anything, it's an act of love. I've seen firsthand what can happen when a child doesn't receive the support they need. I know someone who struggled for years, and because those challenges were never fully acknowledged or addressed, life became much harder than it needed to be. Today, as an adult, they still face obstacles that make independent living very difficult for them. Now, none of us can know exactly what would have happened if things had been different, but what I do know is that early intervention gives children opportunities. It gives them tools, support, a chance to build life skills and confidence. And that's why I think it's so important to take the stigma out of autism. Autism is not a bad word. Different is not a bad word. Needing help is not a bad thing. Every child deserves to be seen for who they are and supported in the ways that they need. The goal isn't to change who they are, it's to help them become the best version of themselves. Today, autism affects millions of people around the world. In fact, one in 31 children in the United States is identified as being on the spectrum. That's not rare. Chances are you know someone with autism, whether you realize it or not. And when we look at the world around us, we can see countless examples of people with autism doing incredible things. Scientists, artists, actors, musicians, entrepreneurs, and advocates. People like Temple Grandin and Anthony Hopkins have shown the world that autism does not define a person's potential. What defines a person is how they're supported, encouraged, and loved. As I listened to B Dub's talk today, I was reminded of something really simple. Kids don't want to be fixed. They want to be understood. Maybe that's the lesson that all of us can take away from this conversation. Whether someone is autistic or not, every person wants to feel accepted, valued, and included. And maybe being different really isn't that big of a difference after all. So for everyone out there listening, I really appreciate you hanging out with me today on the podcast. Please feel free to like, subscribe, and share with all your friends. All your support means the world to me, and I truly appreciate it. So as we finish the podcast today, I'm gonna leave you with a song my son wrote, and it's called Difference.

SPEAKER_02 9:44

When I was five, I realized I had a sensitive mind. Other kids play fine, but I was too kind. I'm too I'm so different from anyone else. I say I'm not perfect, but I'm perfect by myself. I tiptoe, they don't pay right. I won't I run away with this? I'm so different from anyone else. I'm going to I'm gonna do everyone in the house, but it's not a good thing.