16: That “You’ve Done It Now” Feeling

Ever have a moment where something goes wrong… and you instantly feel like you’re in trouble?

In this episode, Tania shares a real-life experience that caught her off guard. What seemed like a simple problem quickly turned into a surge of urgency, pressure, and fear.

But it wasn’t really about the situation itself.

Tania explores how quickly the mind can jump to worst-case interpretations, especially in moments that feel familiar on a deeper level. The pressure to fix things, the assumption that something is wrong, and the underlying belief that it might somehow be your fault.

If you’ve ever felt that immediate “oh no” reaction, like you need to fix something fast or avoid making things worse, this episode offers a relatable look at how past experiences can quietly shape present-moment reactions, and what it might look like to notice that pattern in real time.

Transcript

Speaker 0:00

You know that moment when something small happens and your mind goes, oh man, you've really done it now. That's what this episode is about. I. Welcome to Banish the Lies, the podcast where we outsmart that sneaky inner critic and get closer to the truth that sets us free. I'm Tania Cervoni, your host and fellow work in Progress here to share real stories and small shifts that help you reclaim what fear and doubt once stole. Let's jump in. Hey friends. I want to share something that happened recently. I'm at my parents' place for Easter. We've got people in the house. It's late. My dad has already gone to bed, and I go to turn down the thermostat because I like it a bit cooler when I sleep and as I go to adjust it, the whole thing just glitches. The screen goes blank. Lights start flashing and it becomes completely unresponsive and within seconds I feel it. That rush, that urgency, that feeling of dread, it's that sense like, oh my God, I need to fix this and I need to fix this now. My poor mom senses my stress. She comes over, she starts pressing every single button. Nothing's working. I'm trying to troubleshoot this, and I can feel my body going into like full alert. And I literally started sweating. And the thought that went racing through my mind was, if I don't fix this, my dad's gonna kill me now. I know that sounds rather dramatic, but in that moment, it didn't feel dramatic. It felt real. And what struck me wasn't just that I was anxious, it was like how intense the reaction was compared to what was actually happening. Because yeah, there was a problem. And yes, there was a chance my dad might be upset in the morning if it wasn't fixed, but. There was also a chance he'd handle it just fine. There was really no guarantee either way, and my body didn't leave any room for that second possibility. It went straight to, you must fix this immediately and not let this become a problem. And the intensity of my reaction made me realize this wasn't just about the thermostat. It brought me back to a time in my life where. Situations like this didn't feel small, were making a mistake or causing a problem, had consequences. And somewhere along the way, my system learned, don't mess things up. And if you do, you better fix it and fast. And even though things are much, much different now, my reaction didn't reflect that it came from somewhere older and. I've been thinking a lot about this because I'm guessing it's not just me. You may not relate to my exact story. Maybe you've never broken a thermostat, but I have a feeling that the pattern might still feel familiar. Something happens, and instead of responding to the facts of the situation, we respond with a story based on the past, for example. You get a vague message from your boss and immediately think you're in trouble, or someone's acting a bit off and you assume you did something wrong, or maybe you make a small mistake and it feels way bigger than it actually is. And underneath all of that, there's something like, what did I do wrong? Or, why are they mad at me? Or, this is somehow my fault. And that's exactly where I went. And really quickly, and to be very honest, I was surprised by the intensity of my reaction. I, I didn't realize the level of fear I still carried in me. In certain situations around making mistakes. And what struck me is how fast it happens. Something small happens and my mind fills in the rest. You know, worst case scenario, it's my fault. Fix it now. And this all happens before I've even had a chance to take a breath. And in that moment, you know, with the thermostat, there was another possibility that it would be fine. That even if it wasn't perfectly fine, it could be handled in the morning and that I didn't need to solve it right then and there, and I couldn't see any of that. Like that did not even register in my brain. So I've been sitting with this question, where might I be doing this in other areas of my life where something happens? And I immediately decide what it means before I've even checked if that's actually true. And if you can relate to that kind of reaction, I'd be curious what this brings up for you. I always appreciate hearing from you, and you can find a link in the show notes if you want to reach out. Take care. Thanks for listening to Banish The Lies. If today's episode resonated with you, take a moment to let it settle in. And maybe share it with a friend who could use it too. Lies, lose their power when we're brave enough to challenge them. I'm Tania Cerv oni, and until next time, be kind to yourself. And remember, you're not broken, you're not alone, and you don't have to stay stuck.