Episode 006 - Sarah and Mary Beth

In this heartfelt episode of The Preserve Podcast, Ashleigh sits down with Sarah and Mary Beth from the Trustworthy Podcast for an honest conversation about womanhood, insecurity, community, healing, and delighting in the Lord. 

The conversation begins with the story behind Trustworthy Podcast and how God led Sarah and Mary Beth into creating a space for vulnerable, truth-filled conversations that encourage people who may feel isolated or unseen. 

From there, the discussion naturally unfolds into themes of identity, women’s retreats, comparison, and the pressure many women feel in social settings. The group reflects on how insecurity often stems from self-focus and fear of judgment, while true freedom comes from seeing others through God’s eyes and recognizing that everyone deeply desires to be loved and known. 

The heart of the episode centers around Psalm 27 and the theme of delighting in the Lord. Sarah vulnerably shares her testimony of walking through PTSD and how Psalm 27:13–14 became an anchor of hope during one of the darkest seasons of her life. 

Together, the women explore what it means to:

•  Bring hidden struggles into the light 
•  Renew your mind through God’s truth 
•  Shift from inward focus to outward love 
•  Find joy in daily sacrifice and motherhood 
•  Understand that delighting in God transforms our desires 

The episode is filled with practical wisdom, personal stories, Scripture, laughter, and encouragement for anyone wrestling with fear, shame, anxiety, insecurity, or spiritual exhaustion. Ultimately, it’s a reminder that God is always near, always faithful, and always inviting us to seek Him.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

This is the Preserve Podcast, where we continue the conversation beyond our print publication. I'm Ashley, your host and creative director at Preserve. We're so excited to have Sarah and Mary Beth with us. They are from Trustworthy Podcast. Thanks for having us.

SPEAKER_02 0:20

We are very happy to be here. Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_00 0:24

Can you tell us a bit more about your podcast, when it started, and the heart behind it?

SPEAKER_03 0:30

Yeah, I'll let Sarah take it away. This one was her brainchild.

SPEAKER_02 0:34

Yeah. I had it had been placed on my heart and in my mind to start a podcast back in 2020, actually. Just felt like there were a lot of hurting people out there that were all alone. And didn't really follow through on that. It didn't seem to be the right thing for that time. But a few years later, when I had come to know Mary Beth better, thought maybe now was the time. When I asked her, she said yes, which is that's like the first step saying yes. I had been having good conversations with people, like good conversations, conversations that were a blessing to me, conversations that were a blessing to them. And I thought, well, maybe instead of just one-on-one with people, maybe I could have these conversations and more people could hear what God had to say. So that's how I got started and what the heart behind it is. Probably, let's see, we recorded our first pilot, which we didn't know it was a pilot, did we, Mary Beth? Can you you tell us about that part?

SPEAKER_03 1:39

Yeah. So Sarah was like, hey, I'm thinking of starting this podcast. Would you want to co-host with me? And I said, sure, why not? So I hadn't hadn't thought about doing one, but I thought, sounds like fun. I'll give it a try. So we just kind of met and recorded a conversation. We had been in Bible study together and we're still in the same small group. But we'd never sat down to have like an intentional conversation like that. And so we just kind of pressed record and we're like, we'll see what happens. And that turned into the pilot of the podcast. And we're coming up on 50 episodes now. So we've been doing this how long, Sarah? A couple years?

SPEAKER_02 2:19

Yeah. I think we first started planning in January of 2024. So about a little over two years.

SPEAKER_01 2:30

You guys have great voices for being podcast hosts. I always tell Sarah she does. I she sounds like Delilah, the radio host.

SPEAKER_03 2:38

Oh, I've never heard Delilah. It's like the love song lady. So I'm like, turn on your Delilah voice. I'll just be the balance of the normal voice.

SPEAKER_02 2:48

Clarifying that, being that we often discuss God's word. And when I think of Delilah, I think of the story of Samson and Delilah. I'm glad that you differ Delilah. Yeah. Modern day Delilah.

SPEAKER_00 3:01

Well, welcome. And we are so excited to learn more and to have a deeper conversation. We're going to start with a question to get to know you guys a little bit more. It's kind of an icebreaker. Gives us a glimpse into your personality. What are you wearing today and why did you choose it?

SPEAKER_03 3:21

All right, you want me to go first, Sarah? All right. I am a t-shirt and jeans kind of girl. So anything I wear is going to be about being comfortable. And it's a little cool here today in Pennsylvania. We're in that in-between spring weather. So I have on my jeans. And then I'm wearing a men's quarter zip golf pullover from a golf tournament that's hosted in my hometown every year called The Masters. So I grew up in Augusta, Georgia, and a lot of my family's spring attire happens to be from that golf tournament. So it is, it is my pullover, but it's actually a men's shirt. So there we go. That's great.

SPEAKER_02 4:00

I love that. So I'm also dressed for comfort today. I'm feeling very beach-y. I am wearing a gift from a friend, is the Snappy Turtle Crew sweater from Delray Beach. And I went to visit her this winter in Florida, and this beautiful sweater was laying on my bed when I got there. And I was like, oh. So you love that. And then I also happen to be wearing, I swear, there's a theme here. I happen to be wearing a pair of Bella Doll uh wide leg beach pants that are like mocked. They're so comfortable. It's like wearing pajamas. Anyway, goes perfect with a sweater. Total beach theme. And then I'm wearing some handmade wooden poppy earrings that I also got in one of my other favorite places. Oh, did I say that I got these pants in Napa last summer when I was visiting my cousin? I don't know. Everything I'm wearing has a deep connection to someone that I care about very much. So visiting my cousin went to Napa, got these cute pants at the maker's market in First Street, and then cute shirt sweater from Delray, and then these earrings. They are wooden poppies. And I actually found them in what's it called? Art colony shops at Greenbriar. I swear I do not spend most of my life in luxury destinations. Seriously. Usually I'm camping and riding my bike in the woods, but it just so happens. Anyway, long story short, we have a dear friend who passed away quite a few years ago now. And she loved poppies. And so when I was visiting there, right after uh she had passed, I bought these beautiful wooden earrings for all of our friend group, and they happen to match this beautiful orange sweater I'm wearing.

SPEAKER_00 5:36

So there you go. Beautiful. I love the wooden poppy earrings. You guys are so bright and colorful today. It's spring. We're trying. Yes. And comfort is the name of the game, right? Especially motherhood. It's like no more wearing uncomfortable clothes just for the look of it.

SPEAKER_01 5:54

That's right.

SPEAKER_00 5:56

I want to talk to you guys about the retreat that you guys went to this weekend. Can you share with me maybe even the name of the retreat and what inspired you guys to go?

SPEAKER_03 6:09

So this was our church, our local church's women's retreat. The theme was delight, about delighting in the Lord. And we were just at a conference location. It was only about 45 minutes away from our church, but sometimes that's all you need is just that little change of scenery to refocus and take a break. Uh I can't answer for Sarah about why she went. I'll let her her do that. Why I went, this is actually the first women's retreat I've ever gone on that was like an overnight away from home. Sticking with the theme of me mar wearing a men's shirt today. I tend to shy away from large female events. I'm just not uh I'm not girly girl. I have two sons, and so my house is full of boys. It's just my husband and my two sons and me, and our dog is also a boy. So I tend to get a little like apprehensive at very feminine female things with a lot of female energy. First women's retreat I've ever been on, but I need this is my home church. I'm comfortable here. I'm I want to lean into some relationships there and also see see what God has to teach us. So that's why I went. I don't know about you, Sarah.

SPEAKER_00 7:20

Fun fact, I am actually the same way. You wouldn't think that, but I grew up because I love fashion, but I was very much the girl that was like, I will put on a dress, but I will also go get muddy. And I hung out with my brother all the time. So I tend to joke more and have a lot of fun hanging out with the guys and my husband.

SPEAKER_01 7:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:42

God has definitely grown me in that area. So I understand.

SPEAKER_02 7:45

Yeah, that's funny because I was like, wow, a whole weekend with women. I'm gonna have to be polite and like it because I live with boys too. So it's just, and and as I spent a lot of time outside and um, yeah, but anyway. I went because my friends were going. Very simple answer. Actually, this last past winter, this friend that gave me this beautiful sweater I'm wearing, she's happened to mention, oh, so and so and I are going. Are you going? I'm like, I don't know. I looked at the calendar, I'm like, I it's not gonna work out because I'm actually going to another retreat this weekend, like back-to-back retreats away from my family. I'm like, I don't think that's gonna work. So I really wasn't gonna go. And then at the last, I decided to. Um, I was because I wanted to see them. And then when I got there, well, and I also knew Mary Beth was going. But then when I got there, it was amazing because so many of my great friends from church were there.

SPEAKER_00 8:35

It's interesting. I wonder why there's that feeling, that pressure of girls being around girls. Some women love it, and then other times it's it can feel daunting or like there's an expectation that you have to uphold, which makes us not want to, because we all want to feel comfortable. We all want to feel like we can just be ourselves. But why why do we feel like we wouldn't be able to be relaxed and be ourselves, you know?

SPEAKER_02 9:05

It's a great question. It is a great question. I've thought about this. We when I get dressed up, when I'm putting together this outfit, I was actually like went back and looked up like exactly what I was wearing. I know that this is a fashion magazine podcast, and I wanted to be exact. And I also like wanted people to think that like, oh, wow, that's impressive that you've got this curated outfit. Why? Like, why? And so I think sometimes as women, we we dress for each other. My girlfriends get more excited about what I'm wearing than my husband does. My husband's like, oh, you look nice. So I think there's that as well. And then I don't know, is it oh, I don't know if I want to say this, but is it because when we look at other women, we are automatically making decisions about them. And so maybe we think they might do that to us. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 9:57

Yeah. No, that's a great observation because oftentimes we judge because we feel or think we feel judged.

SPEAKER_03 10:06

Yeah, we were actually talking about this in my discussion group at the retreat this weekend that sometimes we all still feel like that middle school girl. It's like we walk into a room and we think, what are they gonna think of me? What impression am I making? But just like in middle school, everyone's thinking about themselves. I'm not walking into a room being like, so-and-so looks so cool and so-and-so does it. No, I'm usually just thinking about myself. But if everyone's thinking about themselves, then we're really missing the whole point. And that insecurity is often just totally misplaced because that's not how I'm viewing other people around me. It's all it's all in my head.

SPEAKER_02 10:44

And isn't that what our enemy would want us to think, right? Like to keep us from being together. Because and I shared this with Mary Beth, it was very overwhelming for me, just so many women that I knew and that I was like, oh, oh my goodness. I just felt overwhelmed. Part of me just wanted to leave right away. Literally, I was thinking about getting in my truck and just driving home. This is ridiculous. Why? You know? So I think it's this is an interesting conversation, and I don't think it's just specific to our experience this weekend.

SPEAKER_00 11:16

I've learned that we all want to be loved, right, at the core. God so loved the world that he gave his only son. It's that love that we're all seeking. And so often what is behind every person, not so often, what is behind every person, no matter how they dress, their social status, anything, is that deep down they just want to be loved and acknowledged, seen, everything that we receive from the Father. So we used to live in an area that many people will say, oh, everybody is selfish or stuck up, or whatever word they want to use. And it's really interesting because that was not my perspective. Of course, you would experience that outwardly sometimes. When you're thinking in terms of what does that person need when you're passing by them instead of judging them, then all of a sudden you are looking at the core of who they are, not what they look like, or even what they're doing on the outside. And I have found that people just melt all that pride feeling of being judged or needing to keep up an appearance, really is what you would see a lot, falls away because people really do just want to be loved. The enemy really uses judgment within the circle of women because it does hurt so much, because we're all naturally more discerning, so we can feel if someone's judging us. It breeds that disunity because when women are working together, it nourishes our soul. It helps us in so many ways. So you just see the adversaries play to get us to stay isolated, don't go. There's so many reasons. I don't really like small talk too much.

SPEAKER_02 13:12

It's very interesting that you say that because something becomes crystal clear. The message that I clearly got after my time of like, oh, I don't feel comfortable when I want to go home was like, you're not here for you.

SPEAKER_00 13:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 13:24

What you just said exactly resonates with that. And now I'm kind of getting a little bit of hindsight from the Lord that, like, okay, Sarah, that's right. Yeah. And guess what? I mean, I still got a blessing, but I was so focused on myself and how I was feeling and how I didn't feel comfortable. And just like you're saying, looking out for the interest of others, right?

SPEAKER_00 13:44

Yeah, when you're so set on the outward going into what we want to talk about in Psalm, when your eyes are set on the Lord and looking for his will to be done in every situation, then all those other things, all of a sudden you have the energy or you have the wherewithal to be in a situation to speak truth, to walk out what God has intended. And then all the feeling of, oh, I don't want to do this, or I feel judged, I don't feel confident, that all kind of just falls away. And God gives you the capacity to love in a way that you wouldn't have been able to do.

SPEAKER_03 14:28

Yeah. I'm not at all surprised that you said that because it's something we talked about this weekend in my discussion group at the retreat. We tend to look at the world and we have this world view, and then sometimes we will turn around the other way and then look to God and say, okay, God, what do you have to say about this? When really what we should be doing is looking to God and then the world is beyond him and seeing how he sees the world, looking at the people around us and our circumstances and whatever it is through his eyes. That shift frees us up to not feel this burden and obsession with ourselves, but to actually live in other people's lives and that they're I'm sure we can all three think of many examples in our lives where we've been willing to take a step out, help someone else, care for someone else, say that thing that you're afraid to say to someone else. And the outpouring of that is more than we would have anticipated for them and for us. It's that kind of outward focus that can only really happen when we're looking at God and seeing the world the way he sees it.

SPEAKER_00 15:40

I love how God, when you speak truth, speak life to somebody else, it always it it ministers right back to you. So when we do things that are selfish or we speak things out of our just out of ourself even, it could encourage somebody else, but not necessarily encourage yourself, but always. Always when you are ministering truth to somebody else, speaking life to somebody else, it always comes back to you. And that's so cool.

SPEAKER_02 16:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:11

You give and you get.

SPEAKER_02 16:14

Yeah, we find that just all the time on our podcast. That the words that we say when we go back and listen, we're like, oh, yeah, thank you. I needed that.

SPEAKER_00 16:25

Yes, yes. Let's dive in to what you guys talked about at your retreat more specifically. We've alluded to it a little bit.

SPEAKER_03 16:34

It's interesting that the women who planned this retreat from our church had this leading from the Lord to focus on Psalm 27, which is a psalm of David. At the same time, the small group I mentioned before that Sarah and I are in together, we're going through first and second Samuel. So we're reading and learning all about David's ascension to the throne and him becoming king. Our church is also doing the read through the Bible in a year. And right now, in that plan, we are in 1 Samuel and Psalms. All of these things keep coming up in our lives. So Sarah and I were like, well, I think we should pay attention. If it's coming at us multiple ways, we should probably listen to whatever it is God has to teach us. The whole weekend was focused on all of Psalm 27. I know that certain parts of it stuck out more to each of us individually. Sarah, do you want to go first?

SPEAKER_02 17:24

Sure. I'm not going to start in chronological order with the psalm as far as the verses go, because when I was thinking about this, I was thinking about, well, what are the verses that are most, I guess, important to me. So the first ones that I was excited to find that we were studying were Psalm 27, 13, and 14. The reason why is because quite a few years ago, when I was struggling with the aftermath of some difficult times in my life, which presented itself as PTSD, I had to really focus on hope. I had to look forward to something that was different than the way my life was. The beautiful thing about that time in my life is that I had physically come to a place where I had the space both literally and figuratively to deal with that trauma. I had just been recently married to my amazing husband and had previous to that, I had been widowed, a lot of trauma there. So now I could breathe. And I'm just going to share the verses that I had from Psalm 27, 13, and 14. I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait, wait for the Lord. Be strong and let your heart take courage. Wait for the Lord. And at that time, even though things were good, I was in a good place, I was in a good marriage and a safe home, a beautiful home, all these things. I was still dealing with those traumas. And it was hard for me to believe that I would ever be able to escape from that. And I believe I memorized it at the time. And that was just the ESV I read. I believe I memorized it in the NIV, which is, you know, I believe I should look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. And I just kept thinking that. Just kept thinking that. And that verse carried me through some of the most difficult times. And I say that because it was really hard for me to say those words out loud, the things that I was dealing with, the struggles. If any of your listeners out there have struggled with post-traumatic stress disorder due to any situation, mine was uh domestic violence related, but you'll know that you suffer so much alone in the dark. And that's where the enemy does his best for us. So this verse was like, I was hanging my life on it. And fast forward many years later, I go this weekend to meet the Lord. And what a delight to look at this verse and see how he has been faithful. He has brought me into the goodness, the goodness of the Lord. And another psalmist says, for he has set the boundary, my boundary lines are set in pleasant places. And that's another one, too, is I have very pleasant places that my boundary lines are set. So this weekend, when I encountered those verses, I was like, wow, thank you. And just a side note, we had not been given, we were given the word delight, but we were not given specifics on what it exactly it was that we were going to be delighting in. So not to overuse the word, but it was delight when I got there.

SPEAKER_03 20:41

It was delightful. There were a lot of jokes this weekend about the word delight.

SPEAKER_02 20:46

We approve of punny jokes.

SPEAKER_00 20:50

Laughter is good medicine for the soul. Yes. Something someone said to me once when I was younger. I have experienced quite a bit of traumatic events in my life. It was a close family friend who had experienced something similar that we were experiencing. And she said to me, I don't think I can fully describe in how she delivered it, but she said, if I could take this pain for you, I would. And it stuck with me because she knew the pain and yet she didn't want to see somebody else go through it. That's the heart of God, right? That we would like lay lay down our our own pleasures and desires to support and love one another. That was the heart of the father through her towards me. I see you, I see the pain, and if I could take that from you, I would. When you see other people as well going through something, that your heart is just like, I understand. And I hate that you have to go through that. But on the other side of But you also know the goodness of God. He is going to carry them through. It's this hard toggle of I want to take this for you, but I also know that God's going to cover you.

SPEAKER_02 22:14

The last few days, there's an old song that's been going through my mind. I don't know if the two of you are familiar with it. It's called For Those Tears I Died. And it's, I don't even know how long it was. I think what probably in the 80s, we sang it in church or something when I was young. But basically, it's just us talking to God and say, just saying, You said you'd come and share all my sorrows. You said you'd be there for all my tomorrows. I came so close to sending you away. But just like you promised you came here to say. And it's just the words of Jesus saying, Come to the water, stand by my side. And he just says, I felt every teardrop when in darkness you cried. And I strove to remind you that for those tears, I died. And it's exactly the heart of God that he would carry that pain. Because this wasn't his plan. And Mary Beth and I often talk about that. It wasn't his plan, right?

SPEAKER_03 23:09

What a grace that he gives us, other people, as that tangible example. He comes to us and says, I will take your pain. I will take your suffering. I will take your sin. And that he lets us step into each other's lives to be a demonstration of that, to just reflect the heart of the father towards us is pretty amazing. It's just so interesting that we're talking about this. My mom was just reminding me this morning. One time when I was little, I have an older brother and an older sister. And I remember this happening. She was like, Do you remember this? I was like, 100%. It's one of those core vivid memories in my mind. I had done something, I don't remember what it was, neither does my mom. She's like, but you had done something that deserved a consequence. And my older brother went up to my mom and was like, I'll take the consequence for her. And he could not have been more than eight or nine years old. And she said, Are you sure? She made sure he understood what the situation was. And he said, Yeah. He's like, I love her. I want to take the consequence for her this time. And he did. And my mom let him do it. And that, and I love my brother, and we have a great relationship. We also fought a heck of a lot. That was not the everyday existence of our relationship. But that demonstration, whatever God was doing in that moment in his heart, and my heart and my mom's, all of those things to just demonstrate that, you know what? I'm going to step in and I'm going to take the punishment for you. I'm going to take the pain for you. A totally undeserved gift that my brother gave me to show me the heart of Jesus. Yeah. And I was like, wow, that ties right into what y'all are talking about and how funny. Because my mom and I haven't talked about that in years. And we talked about it this morning.

SPEAKER_00 24:53

I love when God does that because it's just those subtle reminders that God is always at work within you to do and to will for his good pleasure. So just always remembering that God is always at work within us and puts things on the different hearts of people and then they all connect.

SPEAKER_03 25:11

Well, I'll share one of the verses that stuck out to me from this psalm. So the I'm a big picture person, so I'm gonna talk about the big picture first. The psalm David is writing this psalm when he's being chased by people who want to kill him. Thankfully, I cannot identify with that. But there is in verse six, I'll just read verse six of Psalm 27. And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me, and I will offer in his tent sacrifices with shouts of joy. I will sing and make melody to the Lord. We had some time during the weekend to they they built it into the retreat, which was very gracious of them to take time to process and think about what we were learning and being taught, and just have some silent kind of meditation time. And so it was during that time that God just highlighted that that verse to me and showing me that these enemies all around me, my my own worst enemy these days is my thought life. That this now my head shall be lifted up to me wasn't a I'm going to esteem you. It was God's gonna, God's gonna lift up my navel gazing. God's gonna get get my view off of myself, kind of like what we were talking about a few minutes ago. That we become so inward focused and I turn inward all the time for analysis and judgment and standards that I set for myself. None of this is coming from the Lord. I'm not lifting my own head up. My head shall be lifted up. God's gonna do it above my enemies all around me, and I will offer in his tent sacrifices with shouts of joy. I was just really convicted that the sacrifices that I'm being called to make in my day-to-day life as a mom, as a wife, working part of the church, whatever it is, that I have not been making those sacrifices with joy. I have been very much begrudging a lot of my responsibilities lately and just seeking and asking the Lord, give me that perspective. Give me the perspective of making sacrifices with joy for all that you have given me and all that you have put before me. Return me to that place of singing and making melody to the Lord. That is not a reflection of my day-to-day life right now. And so God kind of showed that to me that when I'm so focused inwardly, that of course you're not going to be singing and making melody to the Lord because you're gonna be like spiraling. That was one of my main takeaways, is really a prayer that God would lift up my head away from turning to myself as the authority and the source so that I can be living out these. This isn't like a earth-shattering ask I'm making. It's just, can I not roll my eyes when my kids ask me to do something else? Can I not be like, oh, I just did the dishes, I have to do them again. It's the little, it's the daily things. Can I just do this with sacrifices of joy? Like, can we get there? That's kind of what's that's what was going through my mind.

SPEAKER_00 28:18

So relatable.

SPEAKER_02 28:20

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 28:22

I know I caught myself doing that the other day with my oldest because I my immediate reaction was like, oh, she's doing this again. Like, why? And then I like caught myself and I'm like, hey, uh, you know, just opportunities every single day to renew our minds to the truth. And it's every day. It's every day because we live in a fallen world, so there's no the expectation that you're supposed to not sin at all is not realistic. But that when you do sin, right, you have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. Well, I was just talking about this with my husband, but that grace is so much bigger when you're aware of what you are forgiven of. Yes. Not hiding it, not stuffing it under the rug. I think sometimes we even kind of stuff it under the rug, not to necessarily even hide it purposefully, but almost to be like, I call it deflecting, where it's like, oh, I'm I'm a believer, that's not supposed to happen. I have been made new, so why I should not experience this. But that's not actually renewing your mind. Recognizing for me, I really got deliverance when I started and saw the power of God at work in my life. When I started to acknowledge sin, I'm not accepting it, but I would acknowledge it and then I would address it with the cross instead of, oh, I'm not supposed to do that. And then almost kind of just like, you're not, you think, like at the time I thought I was renewing my mind, but I wasn't. And that's why I always felt like the enemy was overpowering me, is because I wasn't working with the power of God. I was just doing by my own ability, trying to put a shield up, like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And then realizing when we take it to the cross and we say, thank you so much, Father, that you sent your son to die for me. And that is for all time. Every single thing, everything. And from that, it produces this thankfulness, this gratefulness and the joy. God reminds me of that in those moments where I'm like getting down on myself, like, oh, I was doing this or I was doing that, or have been ungrateful in this area. And then God just reminds me of that, and then that always that's like the number one, like always. You could do other things that kind of like encourage you and remind you in the physical, but like thinking about that spiritual truth, it always brings me back to that joy, and knowing that we don't have to try to be better, but that when we accept what he's done, he works in our heart and we produce more of his likeness, which is incredible. I hear what you're saying, Mary Beth, and I feel like it's everyone's every day, right?

SPEAKER_03 31:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 31:15

There's always something.

SPEAKER_03 31:17

Well, and to what you're saying, it's we cannot renew our mind if we're not dealing with what is in our minds. We call those things out to the light. That's sometimes the hardest part is just we talked a lot about this week and stopping and dealing with what is going on and not just be in a frenzied state of hurrying to the next thing, but really pausing. It's how counter-cultural that is to deal with our stuff is counter-cultural.

SPEAKER_02 31:46

Often think of as Psalm 19, I don't remember the exact verse, but David says, But who can discern his hidden faults? So who can discern their own faults and and how we can ask the Holy Spirit to bring these things to us? And then, like you said, it's not, oh, I shouldn't be doing this, but it's oh, I'm acknowledging this. And I'm gonna bring it to the cross. Because when we do that, just like when I was talking earlier about my struggles with PTSD, is taking what is in the dark and bringing it into the light that prevents the shame spiraling that the enemy so desperately wants us to fall into. It prevents all these things. And so again, I love hearing this conversation. I feel like every time one of the other three of us is talking, that the other one's going, yes, yes, and me too.

SPEAKER_00 32:39

Mary Beth, I love that you were like, I asked, I was asking. So often we forget to ask. And God says, like, ask and you will receive when it's in line with what He his will for us, like He's already ready. He's already like, I'm I want to pour out everything. He's waiting on us to want, to accept it, because we have free will. He's never gonna force us. He's loving Father. That's and I went through a season where I was asking a lot of questions. I said, God, show me. I realized I was really tense while I was doing the dishes. I've actually learned a little bit, and I think it's because when I'm doing the dishes, I start thinking about my day. Certain conversations or situations, or thinking about what's coming. I get tense. I kept asking God to show me, like, why am I getting so tense? And what am I thinking about that's making me this way? And I kept asking him, show me when I'm thinking contrary to your words, so that I can renew my mind. And then for the Holy Spirit to give me wisdom in how to renew my mind. I I've learned so much now, but years ago, I was like, I don't even know what this looks like at all. God is right there to teach us, to show us individually, because it's gonna be different for each person. It's always gonna be from the foundation of the word, but it's gonna be so different for each situation because for what you're thinking, Mary Beth, is gonna be different from what I'm thinking, but it could result in the same frustration or tension or judgment, but remembering that we can ask.

SPEAKER_03 34:06

And he invites us to do that. That was part of Sarah, what we were talking about with Psalm 27, too. Verse 8. You have said, seek my face. My heart says to you, your face, Lord, do I seek. And that invitation that is like you're saying, it's always extended to us. The Lord wants us to seek him. And all we have to do is respond, right? Okay, your face, Lord, do I seek? I'm here, I'm willing. Just even that small prayer is powerful and effective.

SPEAKER_02 34:35

Yeah, in the NLT version, it says, My heart has heard you say, Come and talk to me. And I like that. I love to look at different versions of the same verse because it changes a little bit, it kind of deepened your understanding. How many times do I respond? Yes. That's something that I'm working on.

SPEAKER_00 34:53

I looked at Psalm 37, 4, which is delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. I wrote down as I was thinking about it, when you delight in the Lord, you're delighting in his nature. You're delighting in who he is. Those desires of your heart aren't going to be negative. You can't look at Christ and be desiring darkness. So when you're delighting in him, and it says, and he will give you the desires of your heart, it works together because as you delight in him, your desires are changing. Back to what we talked about at the beginning, where going into a conference or going into an environment where you're like, I don't really want to do this. But when you're delighting in the Lord and you're looking at what Christ has done for us post-cross, your desires change. Now you want to serve somebody else. You want to see somebody else loved and taken care of instead of being inward focused. So your desire changes. I love thinking about that because I used to just think, oh, he'll just give you whatever you wanted. But that's that's not what it's saying.

SPEAKER_02 36:11

I mean, from our creative hearts. So the three of us are here, various creative pursuits. Obviously, we have the podcasting in common and writing, but we have all done these things because we felt that God was calling us into this specific thing, right? And my desire is to be a writer. My desire is to be a podcaster. My desire is to, I didn't necessarily like years ago when I thought about, oh, I really want to do this. It wasn't like, oh, I'm just gonna get a podcast. It can be about anything, but I also want to do what God wants me to do. I want to please my father, you know, I want him to say, well done, good and faithful servant. But it just kind of struck me that here we all are delighting in the work of our hands that God is giving us, delighting in God, and in turn reaping such a beautiful harvest of delight and joy, not to overuse the word delight, but to reap a harvest of joy and blessing in our own lives.

SPEAKER_03 37:07

Well, and I actually wrote down this in my notes from the weekend that David isn't asking for what God gives, he's asking for God. And just to tie that actually to what you were saying, that all of the desires we have are because we are made in his image and we are desired to seek our creator. Whether it's love, acceptance, beauty, community, relationship, any of those things, sometimes we just have misplaced desires. When we are really seeking the Lord for who he is, those desires are fulfilled in who he is. It's not about what he can do for me, what have you done for me lately? It's not that kind of dynamic. He changes our desires because we start to see that he's the only thing that can fulfill them. That all beauty and all love and all goodness originates from him, from him and through him, and to him are all things.

SPEAKER_02 38:03

But he also uses our desires to accomplish his will as well.

SPEAKER_00 38:06

Yeah, he does. He's working in each individual in the body of Christ to build up the body of Christ.

SPEAKER_03 38:14

He didn't have to do it that way, you know? I think about that often. He didn't have to include us in the working out of his plan, but he chose to do that.

SPEAKER_02 38:23

We get the joy of participating in his plan. And I think that that's really one of the joys of my life when I can see, have a front row seat to what God is doing. That is such a privilege. I'll share my key takeaway from the weekend. And this was the verse one thing I ask of the Lord, that will I seek after, that I might dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to inquire in his temple. This is a verse that I have loved for many years. And when I was reflecting quietly, because we had some nice time to sort of go off by ourselves and be silent, it occurred to me that the temple in the Old Testament and the temple in the New Testament is different. God's presence is in the temple, but after Christ died, the temple veil was torn into and he is with his people. I also am my body is a temple because the Holy Spirit resides in me, the indwelling Holy Spirit. Again, common sense, but I love how God kind of smacks us upside of the head sometimes. I was like, if I want to inquire in the temple, that's just wherever God is. And God's in me and around me and everywhere. I can inquire of him wherever I am. And so for me, it became less about being someplace or having to have a certain mindset of, okay, I'm ready to enter the presence of God and inquire of him, but more just allowing part of my mind to understand that he's with me every single minute, every breath. Again, I knew this before, but therefore, any thought I have, any concern I have, any worry I have, I can just inquire of him. So it became more of this broader understanding of being in the presence of God. That's what I'm carrying out of this weekend, this past weekend, is that just like David says, if I go to the depths, you are there. If I go to the heavens, you are there. There's nowhere that and I always knew that and I always felt that. But now from this weekend, I'm just I'm carrying God's presence with me wherever I go. It's just this whole new level of understanding.

SPEAKER_00 40:45

My father-in-law always says that we are representatives of Christ here on earth, having access to the Father, where you have infinite access to understanding and wisdom and knowledge in any situation. And going back to David, I think he really understood that in a lot of ways.

SPEAKER_03 41:04

And it's so obvious from studying David's life most of the time, was really faithful at seeking the Lord's direction for what he should do in a certain situation or where he should go next. If we're not seeking the Lord first and going to him and seeking his direction and his wisdom, we are so much more likely to fall right into sin. And that David's life is such a testimony to us that you can be a man after God's own heart. And we can be pursuing the Lord, but as we talked about before, there's still gonna be sin in this world, knowing that that doesn't mean the Lord will leave us.

SPEAKER_01 41:47

It's incredible.

unknown 41:48

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 41:49

It's it's incredible because it says that we have a better covenant with better promises and we have an inheritance that cannot be revoked, which is like, wow, wow, God, thank you.

SPEAKER_02 42:01

May I share Psalm 27.1? Yes. The Lord is my light and my salvation. Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life. Of whom shall I be afraid?

SPEAKER_00 42:14

Well, I have enjoyed our conversation. To our listeners, I hope that you've gotten a little piece of encouragement, if not more. Maybe you heard something that you had never heard before. Yesterday, when I woke up, I was praying with my children, thinking about the daytime. When we wake up, it's not time to rest anymore, but it's time to open our eyes and have the light shine in our eyes. When the light is shining, you can see, you have understanding of what's in front of you, what's next to you, the direction that you need to drive. We're to wake up to have that enlightening of the truth, that revelation, and have our eyes opened. So it's the daytime to wake up, awake to righteousness, awake to the truth of who God has called you to be in Christ. If you have not listened to Trustworthy Podcasts, you go check it out. And you get to listen to the beautiful voices of Sarah and Mary Beth.