Cognitive Fatigue - FOMO

In this episode I will be talking about the Fear Of Missing Out, or FOMO and how that can influence cognitive fatigue as it can relate to tendencies towards perfectionism, and can increase decision fatigue too.

Check out other episodes in the series, which can be accessed through the links below

Decision Fatigue episode

https://www.buzzsprout.com/2569749/episodes/19139713

Perfectionism episode

https://www.buzzsprout.com/2569749/episodes/19139729

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:19

Hello and welcome to another episode of Small Steps with me, your host Stephen Davis from Interactive Therapy. If you've listened to any of the earlier episodes concerning cognitive fatigue, then you will already be aware that its development is related to numerous overlapping factors. And the extent to which any of them may impact you is of course highly subjective. If you have not yet listened to the earlier episodes, I've included links to them in the description, but they should also be easy to find by checking through all available issues of the Small Steps podcast. You only really understand the influence that any of these factors will have on your well-being once you start experimenting with alternative perspectives. And it is this search for alternatives that I encourage throughout Small Steps to Wellbeing. So today we'll be exploring the impact that FOMO or the fear of missing out can have on cognitive fatigue, and how its appearance in our lives can be influenced by perfectionism and contribute to decision fatigue, demonstrating how intertwined our behavior can become to impact energy levels and increase cognitive fatigue. Missing out is and always has been central to our lives. But researchers discovered that the desire to leave options open due to FOMO can, in some extremes, be so strong it can be harmful, impacting our physical and financial health. So let me use a couple of basic examples to explain. So imagine that you visit a restaurant. Then your choice from the menu will inevitably mean that you are missing out on the other meals that you could have chosen from. Or if you holiday in one destination, then you can't be in another place at the same time. And while you could avoid FOMO in restaurants by ordering the entire menu, you're not going to feel very well as a consequence, and it will likely cost you a fortune. Don't forget also that this is only one restaurant out of a number that are likely to be established wherever you're located. You're missing out one way or another. Similarly, you can't resolve holiday FOMO by visiting everywhere in the world, unless of course you're being paid to do so. So, how can the fear of missing out impact us on a cognitive level? Well, as mentioned earlier, an increase in FOMO is likely to place more emphasis on decision making, specifically in weighing up the benefits and downsides to your choices. Now, while there may be some cases in which a decision is made easier due to established personal preferences, for example, uh eating a plant-based diet, phobias such as the fear of flying that could restrict travel, or health requirements for like avoiding shellfish or nut-based dishes due to allergies. An individual with FOMO can ponder endlessly over the remaining options available to them. And if perfectionism is in the driving seat, then the perspective of choosing the right option feels paramount, and the more time spent making the right decision can also raise the stakes due to the sunken cost fallacy, increasing the expectation surrounding the choice and its perceived value. Add to this mix the inevitable changes that will occur to the options that you have available. New restaurants will open and menus change. New holiday destinations start to trend on social media and special events are being added to further influence the plethora of choices that are already present. And finally, consider the perceived judgment that some can feel when explaining their choices to others, or if they start comparing their experiences to those of others within their network. The thoughts experience can be akin to a scratched final record, repeating a specific cycle over and over again, and the energy that is being required by our brains in these inefficient moments is definitely not infinite. When FOMO spreads to more and more topics, then it makes sense that the energy will at some point be gone and fatigue will be felt. So on to today's exercise. In what ways is it possible for us to challenge FOMO? I'll provide one potential way as always that you can experiment with over time to observe the difference it should make to you suffering from FOMO. But let's start with an example, if maybe somewhat extreme. I was reading the other day about a Chinese commander, Xiang Yu, who in 207 BC, after ferrying his army across the Yangtze River, ordered his troops to sink their own ships and leave themselves with only enough rations for three days. He did this to show them that retreat was not an option and divisive action was needed in a short period of time. In response, they fought so ferociously that they won nine battles consecutively. Now in this example, Chiang Yu made the choice for his men, and there were no other options available. But consider how you may create these conditions for yourself. When experimenting with scenarios that can trigger FOMO, it can help to start practicing with smaller, repeatable choices, like meals to eat, where to go for a day out, which film to watch, clothes to wear, and other things that can be experienced again and again. Choose a situation where you know FOMO could influence your decision making and make a choice based on your instinct. Share your choice with others and request them to hold you accountable to that choice. For example, you could ask them to order the meal that you know you want from the menu without taking another look at the options. Stick a pin in a map and visit that location, turn up at a cinema at some random time and watch whatever movie is due to start within the specific time period. This, however, is only the start of the exercise. As it has been understood, our FOMO can be distracting, meaning that while we're participating in one activity, we might still be busy thinking about the other paths that we could have trodden. So in this exercise, look to maintain your focus on the activity or the choice that has been made. Accept that what you are doing is all there is, and look to get the most out of the experience. The last part of the exercise is to reflect. You may be doing an activity that you have done many times before, so ask yourself, do you notice anything different about the experience? How successful were you in remaining content with your decision throughout and after its completion? And if you're able to repeat this small step a number of times, then does it change the way you approach and feel about these experiences? And would you be able to challenge your FOMO in more long lasting decisions, such as your study, a relationship, or your career choice? Good luck with the exercise, and don't forget to look out for more episodes of Small Steps to Well Being in the future.