Episode 19 - Jose Sanchez

Summary

Segment 1:
Celebrating Cody’s 40th birthday, reflecting on life, emotions, and growth. The episode explores personal stories, emotional evolution, and future aspirations. We also discuss the “Question of the week”: Do you feel like you’ve become more emotional or sensitive as you’ve gotten older? Why do you think that is?

keywords:
birthday, aging, emotions, personal growth, life lessons, sobriety, family, reflection, resilience, self-awareness

Segment 2:

In this inspiring segment, Jose Sanchez shares his journey from immigrant roots to leading a youth-focused organization that empowers girls through flag football. Discover how sports can build character, create pathways for success, and foster community impact across the US and Mexico.
 

keywords:
Youth sports, Female empowerment, Flag football, Community impact, Leadership, Mentorship, Sports development, Nonprofit organization, International sports tour, Character building.

Find more information about Jose and his organization  at: 

HERisUS.org 

Instagram: @coachjhsanchez 

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:18

You are listening to the Liquid Shape Podcast with your host, Cody Peret.

SPEAKER_05 0:26

Welcome everyone to another new episode of the Liquid Shape Podcast with Cody Petrit.

SPEAKER_01 0:32

Outside Taz and Lorenzo.

SPEAKER_05 0:34

Of course, we have to mention the boys. Taz is all smiles right now. Lorenzo's unsure, but he's happy to be here. He's licking, and they're just they got that energy in them. Anytime we come in here, always, they just they love it. They love being in the studio. Taz wishes he could just say a lot more than just panting, but you can kind of hear him, I guess, maybe.

SPEAKER_01 0:51

Look at that Tom.

SPEAKER_05 0:52

What day is it?

SPEAKER_01 0:55

40th birthday.

SPEAKER_05 0:59

And let me tell you all that last week, and actually the week before that, I think. I was just saying, yeah, my birthday's uh the Saturday after. Saturday after. I kept thinking that tomorrow, which is Saturday, the 9th, was my birthday. I know my birthday was in the 8th, but for some reason I thought the 8th was on Saturday. So I kept saying, Yeah, uh next Saturday is my birthday, but it's too close to Mother's Day.

SPEAKER_01 1:21

Well, I think you were getting it mixed up because we were gonna have your party next Saturday. Next Saturday? Or I mean this Saturday, sorry. But we decided to do it last weekend because this weekend's Mother's Day.

SPEAKER_05 1:32

Mother's Day, and we didn't want to screw things up or anything. I don't know. So we were like, it's too close. People may not be able to make it, whatnot. So we had my party last weekend, and last weekend we pushed it hardcore because we did the podcast like right at night, like Sunday night, the night that I upload, not to do editing and all that crap. But today is my official birthday. I am officially 40 fucking years old.

SPEAKER_01 1:55

Welcome to the 40s club.

SPEAKER_05 1:57

I am so and everyone says that. Everyone's like, Welcome to the 40s club. I feel like I have been the lit la like the baby of the bunch all of a sudden to hit the forties.

SPEAKER_01 2:05

I like forties.

SPEAKER_05 2:07

I'm excited to be in it. I think it's a new decade.

SPEAKER_01 2:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 2:10

It's a new decade, and I made it to 40. The fact that I've made it here is pretty cool. And knock on wood, I hope I have many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many more years to go. I feel like I have a lot of things I still want to do and a lot of life and a lot of love and a lot of everything to to live for. Um if you follow me on social media, you'll see I made a big old post this morning or earlier today. Uh so many of you reached out and wish me a happy birthday. And I'm so thankful for all of you guys. You guys are all the best. I swear to God, like it's it makes my day hearing from you guys. Um, when you guys make comments and when you guys wish me a happy birthday, all that kind of stuff. Just interaction in general makes my day. I don't have to be there in person. I don't have to know you personally just to hear from people. I it it's nice. It's cool to like have that sort of connection with people. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 2:56

Absolutely. It's fun.

SPEAKER_05 2:57

Yeah. So uh today, uh, what did we do today?

SPEAKER_01 3:00

Well, we worked. Well, okay. Verse, reverse. When I woke up, I gave you your presents. Yeah. Awesome gifts.

SPEAKER_05 3:08

Yeah, lots of love, some gifts. We had some coffee, coffee.

SPEAKER_01 3:12

Coffee.

SPEAKER_05 3:12

Uh you got me a fry cutter, you got me a stainless steel knife cutting board, whatever. Um, you got me a tray table up for outside when I'm cooking and barbecue, so I can set my utensils and plates and all that fun stuff on there. You got me some awesome shorts that I wanted, some cargo.

SPEAKER_01 3:29

Dad cargo shorts.

SPEAKER_05 3:30

The dad cargo shorts that I like, the cracky ones. Let's see. And am I missing something else?

SPEAKER_00 3:36

And then we went to Fogo de Chow.

SPEAKER_05 3:39

We just ate a bunch of awesome meat.

SPEAKER_00 3:42

Bunch of meat in our mouths. Bunch of meat. You love saying that. I do.

SPEAKER_05 3:45

Got the meat sweats. I think we were talking about this earlier. When you eat carbs, you and and when you eat carbs, like pastas and breads, like there's a certain feeling that you get, like, where you're just like like heavy and you feel sludgy and tired and whatever. It's a whole different feeling, I I would say, when you eat a bunch of meat.

SPEAKER_01 4:03

Well, yeah, because I mean it's all meat, and then like even the sides and stuff. I mean, yeah, they have some breads and stuff, but I mean, a lot of it's veggie based.

SPEAKER_05 4:10

And we didn't really touch the bread that much. I mean, I I would say we touched way more of the it was meat.

SPEAKER_01 4:14

It was just so much meat.

SPEAKER_05 4:16

Yeah, and we hit that we hit their little uh salad olive garden type of deal thing that they had at the um at the marketplace thing, whatever they call it, um uh buffet style table or whatnot. Um I've been to Fogo de Chow before and I do love that place. That's why when you asked me earlier, you're like, what should we do? I'm like, well, either Italian or Fogo de Chow sounds cool. I haven't been there in years. Like literally I haven't been there since before COVID.

SPEAKER_01 4:38

I've never been to Fogo de Chow, but I've been to I think it's called Rodizio's in Denver. We used to go there a lot back in the day.

SPEAKER_05 4:45

What is what would you say your favorite meat was today?

SPEAKER_01 4:48

Uh like I said in the video, uh the chicken wrapped in bacon. But I mean it was all really good though.

SPEAKER_05 4:53

All really good, the steak and everything. The last time I'd been there, I was upset with them because it was very salty, like heavy, heavy on the salt this time. It was great. Like it was really good.

SPEAKER_01 5:03

Must have been big smokers.

SPEAKER_05 5:04

Probably. But I've always had good experiences there, minus the last time that I went before this last time where it was just way, way, way overdone with the salt, and I just can't stand that.

SPEAKER_01 5:13

And what was your birthday cake?

SPEAKER_05 5:15

They gave me a cream cheese, creme bollet, like deep fried type of cheesecake with raspberry sauce on the side and some fruit, and it was all so good. So good. You can take a look, a picture of the take a look in the picture that I posted on Facebook a little bit ago. Um got a picture of me uh attempting to stab the the the cake and whatnot. But birthday celebration is not over, of course, because we gotta do a big I'm fucking I'm goddamn Cody motherfucking Perez. Tomorrow we're gonna go to the beach, or I should say the coast. We're gonna go to the coast with the boys. Look at Taz gets his ears all perked up. Taz is ready to go right now. If we told Taz, let's go, he would fuck. Oh, he's already looking at me. He'd fucking get his stuff packed up for us and everything. He'd go grab his leash on his own. He's like, You're serious. He is down, dude. Look at him. Manian, you're so cute, buddy. Anyways, we're gonna go to the coast tomorrow or spend the day at the coast with the boys, just me and you. Um it's gonna be exciting. I'm I'm I'm happy to do that. Uh and then we gotta come home and prep things because then we have Mother's Day on Sunday, and we're both very lucky that we have amazing, wonderful, loving mothers that are still alive, beautifully amazing and beautiful. Um, and we're gonna cook for them. And of course, we'll have uh uh your dad and we'll have my stepdad. Uh it's just gonna be a good good old family time on Sunday, um, and we're gonna cook for them. What what do we have planned to cook for them? Potatoes? I don't know if you want to do baked potatoes on the side. Sure. And I'll probably make some corn tortillas, handmade, homemade, handmade corn tortillas. We need it. We need bread. But yeah, I'm I'm I'm excited for uh the birthday celebration. It just it's only starting, and um it's funny. I was reflecting back on, you know, 40 years of craziness and chaos in my life, like all the shit that I have been through. And I think I've said this before, where I see my life in chapters, and um it's just been crazy, like how much I reinvent myself. Every single time I reinvent myself, things change. There's different characters, different people. It's like almost like a movie or a book where there's different people I hang out with, there's different things I'm doing that I'm into, how I am behaving, all that kind of stuff. It's almost like I've lived like a cat's lives, like where I go to the extreme for a moment for a long time, and then the character, my character or my inner ego or whatever dies, and then I reinvent myself.

SPEAKER_01 7:31

You're like a butterfly.

SPEAKER_05 7:32

And then again, there will be a different kind of chaos that builds over time and craziness that I go through, and then it gets to the point where it's just I self-destroy and then reborn again. I'm hoping that those days are long gone and over with, but you know, I'm 40 years old, so I I it I'm still young. I could that could happen again, you never know. Like that's something that's always in my brain. But let's let's let's hope that doesn't happen anymore. But the possibility is always there. I'm always aware of it. I'm aware of myself. I'm very self-aware now. At 40 years old, I feel like I've experienced a lot and I'm very thankful for um everything. I would never have wanted to play it safe. I don't know about you, but like I I just thinking back, like, what if I would have done this? What if I didn't drink? What if I didn't party? What if I didn't take chances? What if I didn't date this person? No, everything that happened happened for a reason. It needed to happen. It taught me my lessons, it gave me experience, it gave me stories to talk about, it gave stories for many, many, many, many people out there. Like I think I told you this the other day. Everyone that's everyone that knows me, that has ever hung out with me or been around me, they all have this crazy ass fucking story to talk about the time. But they one of the times that really stood out to them that I was around them, whether it was the first time they met me or how they met me or something crazy that they seen me do or that they experienced with me or whatever. There's so many people out there that have at least one, if not many, stories like that. It's just funny to think that I'm alive and I have all my parts still. All my limbs are still there intact. The ones that matter, right? All right. So with that said, um, you know, I I'm just I'm happy to be here and be alive. I think I shared this that my grandpa died at 45, and my dad died when he was 50, and both of them died from alcoholism. And it was very sad to see my dad go. I never got to meet my grandpa. My grandpa literally died right before I was born. And so it was, you know, my dad, my dad dealt with a lot of depression from that and losing his mother, who also died right before I was born from cancer. And so it's it's rough, man. It's rough. And it and so I told myself, I'm like, I'm not gonna live like that. I can't, I gotta break that family curse, and I don't want to die from that. And that's one of the many reasons why I needed to make a change in my life. So um happy to be here and hoping to live many, many more years. And I think that the four my 40s are gonna be my best years yet.

SPEAKER_01 9:43

40s are awesome.

SPEAKER_05 9:44

So tonight um it is 10 o'clock right now. We're drinking coffee like psychos to keep us awake and going because at this time, back maybe 10 years ago, even five years ago, we were probably shooting shots and getting ready to barely hit the bars in the club. So, yeah, that a big difference in uh how that how life changes is definitely wild. All right, so let's get to this week's question of the week, which we got some cool responses. Um, I I think part of this question came from me just reflecting on my age and changes that have happened in my life and all that kind of stuff. So I'll go ahead and read the uh the question and then I'll let you start reading some of the answers. So this week's question of the week was Do you feel like you've become more emotional or sensitive as you've gotten older? Why do you think that is? And then some follow-up questions that I had that obviously you don't need to answer all of them, but just follow-up questions that might get the conversation going were what's something that affects you emotionally now that you wouldn't have years ago, that wouldn't have years ago? Do you think life experience made you softer or stronger? Have you become more empathetic with age? Was there a specific moment or phase in life that changed you emotionally? Do you see emotions as a weakness or a strength now? What's a song, movie, or memory that suddenly affects you differently now? Have you become more comfortable expressing emotions over time? When was the last time something truly moved you emotionally? So I'll let you start reading.

SPEAKER_01 11:10

All right. Well, the first one is from our friend Alyssa Carpenter. She says, I'm more sensitive, but I was diagnosed with bipolar, so that's why I've gotten more emotional. I mean, I can totally understand that. I mean, you're, you know, battling a lot of different things, you know, different emotions, all that stuff. So I mean, but at least, I mean, the plus side, at least you have a diagnosis so you can, you know, find ways or, you know, connect with others that you know that have the same thing as well to see, you know, different techniques, how to navigate through that situation.

SPEAKER_05 11:42

I was gonna say that's it's a it's it's it's awesome that now you're aware because sometimes it's what's scary is like when you start feeling things and then you don't know why you're feeling you don't understand what's happening. You don't know like at least you can put a name to like this, put a picture, look into it, do some research on it. And then yeah, there's communities out there now uh available online, luckily, that um you know you can interact with other people that face it and then you can see what works for them. It may work for you, it may not work for you. And what may work for you may not work for them. It's it's one of those things where you just kind of trial and error and then eventually hopefully you discover what works for you and you're able to to manage it for sure. And uh there's nothing wrong with being sensitive at all. I I think emotions are very important.

SPEAKER_01 12:24

Means you're human. Well, big big hugs to you, Alyssa.

SPEAKER_05 12:27

Alisa.

SPEAKER_01 12:28

Alisa, my bad. I always say Alyssa.

SPEAKER_05 12:30

Trust me, I've been friends with Alyssa for many years. I still screw up her name and it's not intentional. It's just I'm horrible because I know Alyssa's, I know Alisa's, I knew Alyssa's, I knew Alyssa's. I know yeah, I d just know people with that same similar name that say it differently, and they get they all obviously rightfully so get mad when you don't get it right.

SPEAKER_01 12:48

Regardless, big hugs to you. I love you. Yep. The next one is from Rebecca L. Bailey Harrington. They say, I'm very empathetic, but I have become stronger as I aged. Sometimes I wish a little girl that loved and trusted would have survived my childhood. However, her death allows me to be stronger. I know I would have protected a younger me. That allows me peace. I'm still a little screwed up. That's why I listen to angry music like yours. It calms me like nothing else. I can sympathize with this, Rebecca. Um I think I think we all grow up, unfortunately, I think a lot of us have some childhood trauma. But then, like for me personally, you know, stemming into like my ex-husband stuff, prior to that I was just super naive. And so that part's dead. I'm very analytical. I see everything, I analyze everything around me, everyone around me, their emotions I can sense when something's off. Like I'm super empathetic. I can just read people, I can tell by their eyes, which is good, but also sometimes I wish I was that things seem so intense all the time. I don't know how to say, like, I guess relax, like not always be on like I don't want to say on guard, but always just scanning.

SPEAKER_05 13:56

The problem though with being naive is that there is a lot of evil people out there that will use that against you and take advantage of you. So the fact that the fact that you went through that, I think has a there's a reason and a purpose for everything that happens, right? So I think the fact that you went through this and now you are a stronger person and now you're looking out for ways to be empathetic. It taught you to be empathetic. Maybe you needed that to get that empathy out of you and to be a stronger person, and hopefully you can, you know, pass this on to other people. Like you can pass on looking out for someone that may be in that situation where they're naive. There's a purpose and a reason for everything. And the fact that you were able to get through it, I'm I'm happy to hear that. You know, yeah, music is definitely uh a good key to uh it's a good resource to help you calm down, to help you vent, to help you feel connected to somebody else that may be going through something similar. I applaud you for this that you were able to get out of it and you come out a stronger person. And sometimes it does suck like when you can feel everything and the world's not all innocent and all that, but at the same time, it really isn't, unfortunately. So anyone that's living like that, there's probably people taking advantage of them. Very likely. I don't I can't even say probably especially in today's world, absolutely. So I'm glad that you're able to be a stronger person because of it, and I'm hoping that uh you're you're able to look out for those that are close to you and take care of them in in the sense of like be a protector, be empathetic for them, and be be helpful for them.

SPEAKER_01 15:20

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_05 15:21

Uh my buddy Nothead, who actually was uh the first guest on the podcast, he says, Absolutely. I don't know about aging, but having kids made me a bleeding, fucking weeping heart for sure. I believe that wholeheartedly, Nothead. Something I've never shared with anyone. Well, I've shared it with close family members, but when my nephew, Xander, was born, my brother's son, literally instantly, right away when I looked at him, I instantly felt love that I had never ever felt before because he was my first nephew, only nephew. And like I had to step out of the room. Like I was, and this is I was still drinking at this time. I wasn't drunk, obviously, but I was I was partying, I wasn't sober or anything like that. I hadn't felt emotions in a long, long, long, long, long time. Like real emotions. And that was an emotion I had never felt in my entire life. And I stepped out of the room and I balled. I was like, I didn't understand what was going on. I didn't know what I was feeling, and I I couldn't couldn't put into words, and then I stopped, I thought about it. It's like, well, this is a new life, and this is what everyone says that you when you have a kid or a family member like that that's really close, um, and a new born new life is born, you instantly know love and you feel love. And I instantly I that was my moment at what 30 something years old, 34 years old, 33, it's I forget what age I was necessarily thirty, thirty-four, maybe. Um, I had never experienced that before. And so it was a very impactful moment for me. And um I instantly knew that I loved this kid and and you know, he's got my heart and everything, and I'd I'd do anything for him. So I totally get that with having kids.

SPEAKER_01 16:47

I mean, it's life-changing. I've seen it change so many people for the better, too. So I mean, it it does help you connect with a deeper part of yourself, I think. The next one is from my friend Maria Russo. Hi, Maria. She says, actually, I'm way less emotional at this age than I was when I was younger. Able to turn it off and look at things analytically now more than ever. I'm not ruled by my emotions, but make choices based on what's best for me and my significant other. I love that. I kind of feel similar, Maria. I feel like the older I get, I don't know if I'm less emotional. I just know how to control my emotions better. I just Which I think is important for everybody to learn, just not to let your emotions get the best of you and just really have you blow up. I mean, for instance, I mean I this is work related, but we had someone that was upset about a situation at work. They didn't hold their emotions well, they resigned. Luckily, they didn't just quit on the spot, but they gave their two weeks, and then now a couple days later, they're wanting to rescind their resignation. It's like, man. So before you go making big crazy decisions because you're in your emotions, you gotta learn to check it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 17:55

And I mean, there's nothing wrong with that. There I for this this question, there's really no right or wrong answer, obviously. I like the idea of being able to turn it off and looking at things analytically because yes, your emotions, you can be a slave to your emotions, and that's not a good thing either. It's good to be empathetic, it's good to have the emotions, but it's also like it's one of those things that where you have to, like you said, put it in check and reassess the situation, see what's going on. Because if someone, if you're a softie and someone just completely knows that and they use it against you and you're not doing it for good any good, they'll take advantage of you. They'll take everything they can out of you. They'll emotionally abuse you, and that's not good either.

SPEAKER_01 18:33

So or also if you can't regulate your emotions and you're just constantly always up and down and just blowing up or just having these emotional moments, no one I mean, I'm not trying to be rude, but people don't want to be around that. And then it bleeds into the workforce. I mean, I know obviously I'm HR, so a lot of my life's just work shit. But I mean, it happens a lot and it's just like, shut it off. Like, I'm not trying to sound insensitive, but business is business. Not saying it's right or wrong with business, but unfortunately, if you're someone that cannot regulate your emotions and you're gonna blow up at everything, every little thing versus holding it, feel your emotions, but don't blow up, don't be reactionary. Learn to sit with it, analyze things before you move forward because you're gonna work yourself out of a job.

SPEAKER_05 19:17

Yeah, and you're gonna burn bridges too. I think this this can happen with friendships, it can happen with family members, it can happen to significant others if you are really reactionary and you just let emotions drive everything. That's a scary thing. I know people that are like that, where they're they're so emotional, emotionally driven that everything they then they stop and think, like, what the hell was I thinking? It's like, well, you're in the heat of the moment, you don't know how to control your emotions, you react it, and sometimes you can do something permanent that can hurt you.

SPEAKER_01 19:45

Exactly.

SPEAKER_05 19:45

I mean, people end up in jail over shit like this.

SPEAKER_01 19:47

Or killing people. That's what I'm saying, yeah. Yeah, and it's just like if you would have just sat with it, thought about it, try to understand it, try to understand it versus letting it take you over.

SPEAKER_05 19:58

It's a balance. It's for sure a balance.

SPEAKER_01 20:00

Emotions aren't a bad thing, but learning to control them is huge.

SPEAKER_05 20:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:04

So where it doesn't become a problem.

SPEAKER_05 20:05

The next one comes in from uh Eugene Rogenstein Jr. He says, You kids crack me up. Age has nothing to do with being emotional or empathetic. You are or you're not. Today's world will show you who people are. Release your emotions in the pit or protest. 69, I'm still on the floor, but not in the pit. But I wear my U.S. Army veteran hat to protest. I love it. There's like I said, there's no right or wrong answer uh on this. It's just it's it's just people's opinions on and their thoughts on this. I would respectfully disagree that I don't think that necessarily it comes with age. Or sorry, it doesn't come with age. It has nothing to do with age. It's either you're born with it or you're not. I don't think that's the case. I think you over time you can learn to get better by your emotions or you become numb. Because if you're born, you could be born the happiest kid in the world, but if you're abused and beat down and bullied and parents don't love you and they they beat you down and that kind of stuff, eventually you're gonna become a bitter cold person and not have those emotions. Or sometimes you you go above and beyond even more to be loving. Or, you know, you might be born in a situation like that where you're just like, nope, I don't want to live like I don't want to live the way that my family raised me. I want to be loving and whatnot. So I think you can learn it. I don't think it's either you who have it or you don't. I agree that today's world will show you who people are. Nowadays, you have to pay attention to actions. I think I've mentioned this before. You have to pay attention to actions, not necessarily words. It's so easy for someone to say something like say, like, hey, I'll be there for you. Hey, I would do this for you, I would do anything for you. I love you, I want to be with you. Okay, but are their actions actually proving what they're saying? If they're not matching and they're just giving you excuses and they're just doing this and that, that's that's not that's that that shows you everything you need to know, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_01 21:53

Uh, the next one is from our friend Kiris Emberborn. They say, I feel more intentional in my emotional state and That my sensitivity has become a superpower. These things were a burden to me when I was living unhealed and unconscious. Years of therapy and practice and mindfulness and meditation created a connection between me, my emotions, and how sensitive I am. I love I love and freely embrace when something emotionally moves me or when I can sense another's emotional turmoil and help provide solace and perspective. I'd wear a cape with a box of tissues as my logo, but then people would probably think my superpower is cleaning up after what is it? Maturation. And I think I'll pass on that. I love I love, yeah, that's it's it's like a superpower.

SPEAKER_05 22:40

It really is. I mean it it really is. Your sensitivity and your emotions. It's and and I mean if you have a superpower, you don't always use it, right? You use it when it's needed and when you have to, and you keep it in check. That's the way I kind of see a superpower. And it's it's not something that's just like boom, I'm using it all the time.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

Well, I think Keris, I think you are a super uh a superhero in a sense. And I think they've been through some shit, they've been through some shit. And for them to be able to be empathetic and still have love and care for others, I think that's huge because so many people could self-sabotage and just drowned in the this happened to me, this happened to me, this happened to me. But I think you definitely have taken the steps to embrace it and use it as your superpower, as you say.

SPEAKER_05 23:28

Superpower that you can now hopefully be an inspiration to others and use it to show people that there is a way out. You can go, you can go through all this craziness and all this pain and chaos and come out on the other side better and stronger because of it. And now you're doing great things, like you're helping others. I love seeing that. I think I I think everyone does. Everyone loves seeing someone at the very top, and for some reason people are fucked up and weird and crazy. They love to see like superstars and whatnot crash and hit the bottom, and then they also love it when they rise again and do better than they were ever doing before, which is weird. But I think it's because it what I think what makes people like that is to know that they are human as well. A celebrity that's all over TV, that's you know worth millions and billions of dollars and all this crap can be at the very top of their of their A game, but then also can can fall down at our levels and even sink lower than us. But then all of a sudden they rise from the ashes. Because it gives us hope. It makes us realize that they are just people, and then it gives us internally hope that, hey, if they can do it, when they hit rock bottom, I can do it too. I can come out better than than you know on the top. Oh, your alarm is killing our podcast. Which alarm is that? I don't I don't even know.

SPEAKER_01 24:46

I need to go through and clear what those are.

SPEAKER_05 24:48

It's a party foul right there.

SPEAKER_00 24:50

Anyway.

SPEAKER_05 24:51

Even Taz is giving you the look, huh, Taz?

SPEAKER_00 24:53

He's smiling at me. He loves his moms.

SPEAKER_05 24:54

No, he's giving you the look like moms.

SPEAKER_00 24:55

He loves his moms.

SPEAKER_05 24:56

The next one is coming in from Christopher. And I'm gonna fuck up the last name, even though I know Christopher. Christopher Gorlitz. Gorlitz. And Christopher says, less sensitive but more emotional. I would say I agree with that for myself. That's a good one. There's there's a big difference. And the way I see it is like sensitivity is like if someone says something I think is gonna offend me, or so that they think it's gonna offend me, or that normally what like something that I may not like, I don't let it affect me. But I can be emotionally tied to something, like if someone says something the wrong way to me that I care about. I think sensitive is like when you take something too personal, but then emotions and you get emotional over something is like when something just really sinks and hits your heart. Like, you know, if everyone's invited to this, you know, gathering of my family members and I'm the only one that's not, like I that would hurt. I'd be like, what the fuck? Like, why didn't I get the invite and everyone else did? But like if someone says, Hey, I hate your band, your voice sucks, your band sucks, I'm gonna live and be like, Okay, and I'll move on. So I'm not that sensitive to to that to that sense. So Chris, I I totally get what you're saying. I I feel like I'm on that level too at this point.

SPEAKER_01 25:58

I think the same, actually. I see both. That makes sense. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Makes me think about what my answer is gonna be. I don't know. The next one is from Matthew. I'm gonna butcher your last name and I apologize. Gru Grudzinski. Grudzinski. They say I am close to ten months sober and literally changed a hundred percent of my life, work relationships, eating healthy and working out and still having weird ups and downs emotional moments. The key I learned in all emotions are valid. It's recognizing if they are rational or non-rational. That's true. That's true. That's that's part of I think regulating your emotions. Just is this something to be upset about and have an emotional response, or is this something I just swallow and move forward or let go, essentially.

SPEAKER_05 26:43

And and this is gonna have to do with my response that I'm gonna talk about later. So I'll go into more detail once it's my turn. But Matt, I will I will say this that what you're going through is perfectly normal. And depending on how long you've been drinking or do using whatever it is that you're you're sober from, it's gonna take a long time before your body is reset and you get these emotions back and these feelings that you don't understand and that uh you're feeling for the first time in years. And depending on if you were using since you were a teenager, you know, your feelings are gonna be completely different with life experience, depending on what age you are now. So understand that that there's it's perfectly fine. It's just gonna take time. And mad props to you for being 10 months sober. I'm very proud of you. The fact that you changed your life and you're putting in the work and on your relationships and eating healthy and working out. Um, you're gonna have your ups and downs, and that's okay. But those ups and downs are so much better when you're sober and you're not depending on chemical that just continues to destroy your life and does not make things any better. I promise you that. And it with time, it just gets better. It gets better and better and better. I'm gonna hit three years in September, and it's the greatest thing I've ever I've ever ever decided to do for myself and for the people that I love. So keep strong, keep going. It's gonna get better. And yes, you're gonna have those hard days, but you're you push through them, and it just adds to your strength and to you overcoming the shit.

unknown 28:01

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_05 28:02

Next one is from John Gillian, and he says, I don't know about age, but getting sober from alcohol and opiates sure as hell made me get more emotional. I cry at the littlest things now, like a bitch. John, you're not a bitch, man. It's it's okay. Matt props you for getting sober from alcohol and opiates. Keep going. As I said to Matt, it's it's it's important to keep going and you're doing something great for yourself. You're you're you're you're doing it for the people that you love, for yourself first and foremost, because that's your foundation, right? To do it for yourself so that you can be a better person. And then of course, you know, it just goes up from there. And, you know, the people that are around you, your loved ones, whether you're family, friends, if you have kids, your parents, brothers, sisters, cousins, whatever that you have around you, they all benefit from a better you. And you then you make better decisions. And so there's nothing wrong with getting emotional. You're starting to feel things again for the first time, probably in a long, long time. And with time, like we were talking about earlier, you'll be learning to manage that and make better decisions and be able to turn it on, turn it off when you need to. Um so good for you. Keep going. Proud of you, John. Proud of you, Matthew. Um, I love hearing people that are getting sober and cleaning up their life and and and fixing it because it's not easy, not easy, but it's a life-changing thing that like I I can't say enough. Like, I'm getting like all worked up right now, just like talking about it.

SPEAKER_01 29:24

So and I think with that too, I mean, go jumping off what Cody said, you're feeling emotions that you've probably haven't felt. And I mean, obviously, we don't know how long, but I'm gonna assume a long time. Be gentle with yourself. You're doing a big thing, and that's awesome, but be gentle with yourself. You're not a bit no one's a bitch for showing emotions or feeling feelings they've never felt. It's a healing process. So good job.

SPEAKER_05 29:47

Proud of you. Next one is from Stephen Geary on Instagram. And Steven says, yes, and the reason is because life is relentless and my daily life is pure hell. I have one bright spot, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to turn my back on civilization and just walk into the woods for good. Well, I I will say this, Stephen, that um if you feel if you're if you're feeling like this, maybe change the scenery, maybe change the people that you're around. You know, sometimes you have toxic people that are just further convincing you that life is harder than it needs to be, that you are these people may not even be worth your time. And and and if you can't get away from them immediately, maybe what I would do is just start start thinking about what you can do, what you have control of to change the situation. What are you in control of? What are you not in control of? The minute you accept what you're not in control of will make things a little bit less frustrating. And then when you can control certain things and you're able to do that, it'll make you feel empowered and it'll make you, if you really want to change it, you'll do those things that you can control to adjust and hopefully put yourself in a better position. And, you know, I I've been around some very toxic people in my life, including myself being toxic, obviously. So I'm not just pointing fingers. Don't get me wrong. I've fucking been brutally, brutally, brutally toxic and a horrible human being. I laugh about it now because like it's it's I was bad, very, very bad. But I was also around a lot of bad people around me. Like over the years, I'm not just talking about recently or anything like that. I'm talking about for the last 25, 30 years of my life that I would surround myself around people that I shouldn't have been surrounding myself with. And when I cut ties with people over these years, things would always get better. But being the bad boy that I am, eventually I would find, because I was still toxic, toxic people around me. You are the energy that you surround yourself with. And whatever you put out, you will get back. So I'm not saying that you're toxic because I don't really I I I don't know you, so I can't say that you are and I don't have enough information. But stop surrounding yourself around people that are driving you to this position, driving to this point. If it's a job that's getting you crazy, you need to get out. I can tell you right now, if as someone that worked at a place that drove me nuts for 14 years, I you gotta get away. So I I'm hoping and wishing the best for you, Steven. You got it, and and things will get better, I promise you.

SPEAKER_01 32:02

All right. And the next one is from is it Doc A Fall? Doc A Fall. I feel like as I have gotten older, I've just learned how to better interpret what emotions I should be feeling. I have an antisocial personality disorder, which has its advantages when dealing with hostile people, which in my line of work happens uh kind of often. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 32:26

Yeah, that's rough. Um I like that you're able to interpret what the emotions are and what you should be feeling. That's that's a that's a good thing. I I think that's the first step actually is to understand what what it is that you're feeling, because then at that point you can at least come up with solutions or options that you have available to you to prepare yourself on how you plan to react and how you plan to move forward with it. So it's good that you're getting better at learning how to interpret that. I think a lot of people out there unfortunately don't know. Yeah like they just feel something and they're just like, well, and a lot of the times it can just be a a as simple as a misunderstanding, miscommunication or something like that between two people, three people, whatever. And then of course you get on the defense because maybe from past trauma or whatever. So I'm wishing you the best, Docca.

SPEAKER_01 33:11

I would say kind of to bounce off that, it's kind of interesting, like once you learn about like disorders that you may have. So like I have ADHD, um, which I've learned makes me really good in um chaotic situations or emergency situations. I can stay calm and focus when others are spinning and losing their heads.

SPEAKER_05 33:32

Others, she means me and people at work probably. No, but me for sure.

SPEAKER_01 33:36

It's always I I don't know that's a plus sign, but I feel like it is.

SPEAKER_05 33:40

When they say your your person is your better half, I believe it because you uh you definitely keep me in check when I because I'll lose my fucking mind. Like uh when I am when something suddenly happens and I either I'm in fight or flight mode.

SPEAKER_01 33:53

You've gotten, I will say, very reactional personality, but depending on the situation. Depending on the situation, yes. But I do have to say, I think just in the course of the four and a half years we've been together, I mean, you are getting I mean, I think you're handling it better and better, and the more we talk about it or talk about things, yeah, communication as reactionary, especially when you see that there's maybe a negative that comes with the reaction.

SPEAKER_05 34:19

Yeah, consequences are not. All right, so I'll let you go first since I went first last week. I let I'm pretty sure I went last week first, didn't I?

SPEAKER_01 34:26

Roll it back. I'm just getting it.

SPEAKER_05 34:28

Oh, the tape. Taz is laughing too. Look at him. I'll go first if you want, I don't care.

SPEAKER_01 34:33

Um up to you. Okay, I'll go. Um, okay, so do you have to answer all of them just the ones you're doing? I know. Do you feel like you've become more emotional or sensitive as you've gotten older? Why do you think that is like someone who was it? Christopher that said less sensitive but more emotional. I think that's kind of me. I think but maybe I'm opposite. So I feel like I'm less emotional as far as like what I show people, what I say, like my reactions, but sensitive, I think I'm more sensitive, but I kind of internalize it. So because I have to analyze everything too, kind of going back to regulating emotions while you're looking at me like that.

SPEAKER_05 35:13

Like when we watched the whole Kogan documentary last week.

SPEAKER_01 35:15

Oh, I fucking bald my eyes. I don't know. I do, I have yes, okay. So I guess maybe I am more emotional on some things. Like I do cry at things a lot more. Movies, TV shows. I mean I've mentioned before, like I've been, I know this isn't everybody's cup of tea, but it's mine. I've been reading the Bible, so there's a lot of key things in there where I will find myself just crying emotionally because it just hits me just right. So I I think it just depends on what it is. If it's something like that, movie, book, whatever, maybe more emotional than I was. But I think I'm sensitive in this way that I think I feel things more now. And so like I think because I analyze everything so much, and I can tell when people's emotions are off that sometimes I can take things like maybe a little more personally. Um, but then that's where I internalize it to see is this something that I need to have a conversation about, or are you just in your feelings right now? So and like I've mentioned a million times perimenopause. I mean, that's a it's a w it's a wild ride. So that's why I have to sit there and sit with myself and say, is this just a fucking hormone thing at the moment, or is this something to really make a thing out of? And if you do make a thing out of it, what are the pros and cons of it? What's something that affects you emotionally that wouldn't have years ago? I mean, I think just lots of things like we just said, like with the movies, or I think hearing other people's stories too, especially like traumas and like how they've gotten found the way out, really worked on themselves. I mean, that that hits a key a chord with me and I I can get emotional or like tear up or cry or whatever in happiness for them. Do you think life experience made you softer or stronger? Both. It's made me I'm the str I know how strong I am. I've been through a lot in my life, but also it's made me softer to others, especially in maybe in the same situations or to like empathetic? Yeah, empathetic. Like I can step back and say, maybe this isn't about me right now or whatever. Have you become more empathetic with age? I've always been empathetic, but I think obviously more with age just because of experience with life traumas, goods and bads, I guess. And was there a specific moment or a phase in life that changed you emotionally? Um Yeah. I mean, the past relationships, the past marriage, you know, some things growing up, just like many things in life. The bosses toxic bosses. I mean, it's just across the board. I think everything makes us change hopefully for the better. Makes us stronger. Do you see emotions as a weakness or as a strength now? Both. It depends. I think it's strong to have emotions, but don't let your emotions overtake you to where it becomes a weakness.

SPEAKER_05 37:45

And be seen too much to the point where it becomes a weakness as well.

SPEAKER_01 37:51

Absolutely. People will use it against you. So be that's again where you know emotional regulation is huge because you want to protect yourself, like feel your feelings, but find a productive way, whether that's hitting a punching bag, going for a run, find productive ways versus just blowing up causing a big scene or whatever, and then the next day you're going, fuck, what did I do? You really have to regulate that. I mean, it's hard, but you can do it. Yeah. And then also, like what I'd say at work a lot, you know, with people too, it's like put yourself on the opposite side. How would that make you feel if you were around someone like you? Nicer than that. But you're not going to be able to do it.

SPEAKER_05 38:26

Well, I mean, that there's nothing wrong with that either. If you really if you really, really are acting like a great person, that that shouldn't offend you.

SPEAKER_01 38:35

That's true.

SPEAKER_05 38:35

But if you have any doubts in your mind that maybe you aren't, yeah, that maybe hopefully gets you thinking and gets you like, okay, well, yeah. Or sometimes you just have to throw in their face and be like, okay, this person's accusing you of this, this, this, this, this. Now, hold on, I'm not saying you're saying that. But let's say if someone was doing these things to you, how would you feel? Would you relate to this person then?

SPEAKER_01 38:54

Exactly. What's a song, movie, or memory that suddenly affects you differently now? I'm sure honestly, there is many. There's just so many, you know, whether it's from the past or even like new ones, I'm that would not fly today. Or if it's very misogynist, like I get kind of I can feel it in me where I'm like, what the fuck? Like, and this was just fucking okay. Obviously, to a point it's funny. Like, like, let's we can joke about things, but obviously if it's a situation, it's not funny. But there's just certain things, certain movies, some things, some sayings. I'm just like, holy shit, man, we come along with that.

SPEAKER_05 39:29

Like Gus on uh Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's dead, that slimmy guy that's hitting on that young girl. Oh, yeah. Remember he's all talking about juices flowing and like trying to get with the girls.

SPEAKER_01 39:38

It's like, shut the fuck up. Creep.

SPEAKER_05 39:42

Oh man.

SPEAKER_01 39:42

But then it's kind of like you want to call him a pedo, but in that movie he doesn't realize. He doesn't know, but he's also the office creep, it's just a pervert. There's always a creep. Uh have you become more comfortable expressing emotions over time? I think so. Um my whole thing, like growing up or like in my probably up until like the last like few years or so was don't show emotions because it's a sign of weakness. Just because things I've gone through, people taking advantage, or whatever. But now I can control that. But I'm not gonna hide my emotions. Like I don't want to just be a cold-hearted individual. Like I want to show love. I want to be love. Because again, going off what you said, you get what you put out. So I want to give love, show love, show empathy, show happiness. That's what I want. I think everyone deserves happiness. So um, when was the last time something truly moved you emotionally? Man, moved me emotionally. I mean, is this like sad to say? I'm not really a big like star follower or famous people, but when Katherine O'Hara died, I mean, that was our 90s mom. That kind of moved me emotionally. That was sad. I thought I really feel I mean, obviously, I don't know, it was Hollywood, right? And especially with all the things that have happened recently, maybe she wasn't a good person, but I don't know. I just the vibe I always got from her was that she was just a good person.

SPEAKER_00 41:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:00

And cared. I hope in my mind, I hope that's who she was. It seems like it, but I don't know.

SPEAKER_05 41:06

Sometimes if you relate to somebody, like their character or what they do or their storyline or something like that. I you can get wrapped up in that. And it yeah, and then when they pass away, it's it's like a part of you as well.

SPEAKER_01 41:18

I like I was crying, remember? That whole morning, I was like, I even messaged my team. I'm like, I need a minute. I don't know. That just that's not someone who I was like I mean, I don't idolize anything, but I don't know. That just hit me and I was like, wow. I love that.

SPEAKER_05 41:32

I love that you are not afraid. Like you laugh. I laugh kind of like smile at you every time when I know a part's coming up in a movie because I already know now when you're gonna cry. So I always look right at you. I always look right at you and then don't look at me, but I already see the water forming in your eyes. Because I always know in the movie or in something. Any it could be a movie that we're just watching or TV show. I always know when you're about to tear up because I know you, I sense it. And I love that you're able to do that. There's nothing wrong with that. Feeling is a great thing. When you don't feel, that's concerning.

SPEAKER_01 42:02

Don't bottle it up, but also, like we've said, learn to manage it. Learn to manage it. Yeah. All right, Perez. Birthday, boy.

SPEAKER_05 42:10

I'm on the I'm in the hot seat now. I'm in the hot seat now.

SPEAKER_01 42:12

The lights on you.

SPEAKER_05 42:13

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 42:14

Where were you?

SPEAKER_05 42:16

Where was I? Well, I deny everything I didn't tell my lawyer's here. You would. Um I would. Dude, this is coming from a guy when I when I got so pissed off at work, there was times where I was gonna bust out my phone and hit the record button in like my one-on-one sessions with my bosses and say, All right, so you want to have a conversation here about my performance. I'm gonna record it and I'm gonna talk to my lawyer about this to make sure that it's okay. I didn't do that yet because they knew not to fuck with me. My bosses learned over time.

SPEAKER_01 42:43

Hold on, because from an HR, I'm sorry, broken record, guys. Know your state's laws, Oregon and Washington. It is illegal to record any conversation. You need two-party consent.

SPEAKER_05 42:55

Well, what I would say is this, and I was I I wasn't gonna secretly record.

SPEAKER_01 43:00

So if they're not in agreement, you just won't hold up in court.

SPEAKER_05 43:04

Okay, this is a Cody Perez that's gonna piss you off and it's gonna cause problems in the workforce. But what are you gonna do? Fire me over it? I would say here. I'm gonna hit record this conversation since there's nothing wrong going on here and you're just coaching me, I'm gonna hit record, and then if I feel like something is not right or I'm not being treated fair here, I'm gonna take it to my lawyer and we're gonna discuss this. Are you uh do I have your consent to record? If if he or she said no, I'd say, okay, then we're not gonna discuss this until we can find common ground to be able to record it and I can take it to my lawyer. Otherwise, I have nothing to say to you in this one-on-one conversation. What would you do with an employee like that? You couldn't fire me over that. I am very difficult. I I can get under your skin. Good. And then guess what? I would bring my lawyer in if I had to, and it would be it'd be one of those things where like eventually I promise you I would skid real close to the lines where you couldn't fire me and I'd piss off everybody because that's exactly what I used to do at the call center. I used to love pushing buttons because no one else had the balls to do it except for me. I would always tell them. I would I I would if I was gonna do something like that, I don't care who it is, I would say, We're recording. If you don't agree to this, then I'm I'm out of here. We're not gonna talk. You distracted, you got me all fired up just thinking about the call center. I if you couldn't if you couldn't tell. I'm trying to that was I I hated that job so much and I just hated the bullshit rules they had there. Yeah. So do you feel like you've become more emotional or sensitive as you've gotten older? Why do you think that is? I feel like I have gotten more emotional. Yes. I am starting to feel again, finally. So as I mentioned earlier with some of the comments that were made earlier about sobering up, something that no one tells you about getting sober is that you will have to learn to deal with emotions again. You're gonna have to learn with feeling again. You've been numbing yourself with drugs, alcohol, whatever for many years. For me, it was since I was 15 years old. I wasn't even a man yet. I didn't even know how to handle my emotions as a teenager, let alone to be feeding them with drugs and alcohol. How the hell was my supposed to like at 38 years old, 37 years old when I'm sober, now finally sober, after years and years of abuse of putting bad shit into my body and numbing them? Now all of a sudden, a couple years later, my body is now reset. My body is now like starting to get emotions again, my brain cells feel better. I'm getting brain cells that could I can actually hold and retain information and get feelings again. And it's weird. Sometimes I'm just like, oh my God, like why did I why did I feel that? Why did I like why does this hurt? Why does and I'm not talking about like my joints, my body or anything like that. I'm talking about like my heart or like why am I taking something to like my brain, I'm thinking it or overthinking it. And it's because I'm now just again starting to feel I was numb for so many years. And now I'm in the position where I'm trying to, like we mentioned on some of these these comments earlier, I'm trying to understand these feelings, these emotions. And I'm trying to myself figure out how am I how do I want to respond to this? How do I want to react? How do I want to show up for this? How do I want to manage this? And so I would say I'm I I don't think I'm sensitive because if someone says something like, like I said earlier, like you talk shit about my band, I'll defend it, I'll talk shit back to you, but I don't take it personal, I don't overthink it. Um if you call me some like racial slur or like just make some joke about my like my look or whatever, I'm not gonna take it personal. I'm not gonna be out be offensive about it, or if you say something that is offensive to most people, I probably won't get offended by it. Very likely I won't. But certain things, like I said earlier, like if someone, if the family had a gathering and I wasn't invited, that would suck. I'd be like, what the fuck? If the band was all hanging out and they didn't invite me, I'd be like, what the fuck? Like, why am I not invited? Like certain things like that, or if I five like just just certain things where I will I stop and think, like, okay, I'm doing a lot more for you as a friend. Why are you not doing that for me? Why will you not do a simple task? I I I pay attention to those things a lot more. Whereas before, when I was drinking and partying, I didn't care. I just thought that was kind of part of the whole situation. But now I'm a firm believer of being in a friendship, being in relationships, being a relationship, whether it's a friendship or a romantic one or family members or whatever, it's give and take, give and take, give and take. You have to you can't always just take, take, take, take, take. If you always take from me, eventually I'm not gonna have anything left. And so fuck you. Like you have to you have to give some back too. If I'm gonna be a good friend, if I'm gonna be a good lover, if I'm gonna be a good family member, you have to do the same back for me because eventually I'm gonna say no. And I have a lot less patience for putting up with that shit anymore. I just don't put up with that crap. I know my value, I know my worth, I know what I want, I know my peace, and I don't want to juggle it and and and risk it for anybody else. So I would say that's that's where I'm at with that. Do you think do you think life experience made you softer or stronger? It made me stronger for sure. I wouldn't say softer, stronger because I I've been through some shit, and now whenever things come up, I can reflect back on those things that I've gone gotten through and I can know how to better respond to them. I know that this is just a passing. It will I will get through it even when it sucks. One of the things that I um never thought I'd be able to deal with was my dad dying, my grandma dying. I lost both of them. One of the hardest, hardest, hardest things I've ever had to go through, but I was able to get through it. It really sucked, and it still affects me to this day. I still dream them, I still think about them, I still think about those moments. I get flashbacks and I don't like it. But it it's made me stronger for sure, 100%. Do I see emotions as a weakness or a strength now? I see them as a strength 100%, with that keeping in mind that it could be a weakness, like we mentioned earlier. If you are a person that allows people to seed through that and that you always give in and that they could take advantage of that, it will be a weakness. If you can't think straight and like we mentioned earlier, someone that can uh analytically stop and pause and look at things to to consider what's happening and then react, people will take advantage of that. So it's definitely a strength because you've been through it, you feel you you'd feel obviously, and you have that experience, but it could be a weakness as well. What's a song, movie, or memory that suddenly affects you differently now? I think anything like anything media-wise, like as far as songs, movies, and all that, give me flashbacks because I anytime I'm listening to a song or I watch a movie, I try to tie it into my life or someone close to me or something I've been through, just so I can feel a personal connection to it. Just one movie off the top of my head that like always breaks my heart is watching like John Q, the one with Denzel Washington, where his son is dying and he has to break like the insurance is not covering it, or just cancer or tumor or whatever, or his heart, I forget what it is. Many years ago I watched it, but like anytime I've seen that, like the the father goes out of his way to go and do what's needed to be done so that his son can live. Like he's willing to risk going in there with a gun and you know holding up the hospital for them to do the surgery. Like that, I mean that that just goes to show you the love of the love of a father, love of a parent, whatever extent it they'll take. Um, anytime I see movies now where I think um someone is passing away, like a family member, like a mom or a dad or a brother or sister, like that that always gets me right in the heart, and I just I hate that. I don't like dealing with that. Movies now where people are talking about addiction or going through addiction withdrawals or craziness like that. I do not like watching movies like that. I get that nasty taste in my mouth of like either the alcohol or coke or something like that that I've done. When I see that and then I kind of get the shakes, it's fucking, I don't like it. So it affects me in that sense too. Have you become more comfortable expressing emotions over time? Oh yeah, I don't give a fuck if you make fun of me. I don't care if you think I'm emotional or I'm this and that. And like, no, if I'm feeling something, it's valid. Same with anyone else that like my friends and whatnot. If you tell me something and you're expressing how you feel or you're going through something, I'm not gonna make fun of you. I will listen. And there's times, of course, there's a time and place for joking, but when it's when someone's like pouring their heart out to you about something that they're passionate about or they care about or they're worried about or whatever, you just listen and you be a good friend and you try to guide them and and let them know that you, you know, you'll at least be a an ear for them and reassure them that their feelings are valid. So for me myself, I don't mind expressing. If you haven't, if you follow me on any of my social medias, you say like I I share everything. I don't care. I don't care if people make fun of it. I don't care that people see that I'm happy. I don't care when people see that I'm angry or whatever. I like I just express myself, I put it out there, and I don't care. I realize the internet's forever and that people can go back and poke fun of it or bring it up and throw it in my face. At the end of the day, I'm gonna say, okay, I put it on the internet knowing that anyone could see it, that anyone can read it, anyone can throw it in my face. Do you think I care that you're making fun of me for this? No, I don't care. I I zero shits are given, zero fucks are given, zero whatever. It's like I don't have any of those right now in my life. And I'm just losing as I get older, I'm caring less and less about that kind of shit. I don't I don't have time for dealing with worrying about what other people think of me. I I didn't care when I was younger. Do you think I'm gonna care at 40? No. Um when was the last time something truly moved you emotionally? I can't think of the last time necessarily. But like I said earlier, when my brother's son, my nephew Xander was born, that moment changed me big time. Like it was just like, and it's hard to describe. And anyone that's out there that's a parent or anyone that's been close to somebody that when you're there for their birth, it's a different feeling. I had never been there for something like that. Um, and it's it's it's a very different type of love, it's a very different type of emotion. And then I started reflecting about like how happy my grandma and my dad would have been to be there for you know Xander being born. And it was just I even get kind of choked up just talking about it right now, just thinking about it because I love the kid so much. He's a he's a great kid and he loves his uncle. He's so smart. And shout out to my nephew Xander. I fucking love him, and he's uh he's a great, great, great, great kid. So I'm excited to I'm excited to just watch him grow and be there for him in any way that I can be. So um this this week's podcast uh question of the week was really regarding what I'm feeling right now, like some of the shit that I've been like feeling as I'm getting older and whatnot. So I thought the question of the week was appropriate for this as I'm turning 40. So with that said, my next guest uh for today's for this week is an awesome, awesome conversation I had with a gentleman by the name of Jose Sanchez down in California. Jose is an awesome leader, he's leading a pact of people that are doing some great things down there for the youth, uh, specifically for the ladies that like to play sports. They're part of an organization called herisus.org. That's H-E-R-I-S-U-S.org. And we had a great conversation. I'm super excited for you guys to hear this. He's got a lot of passion for the work that he's doing. He's doing a great thing for his community. He cares about the youth, he cares about kids, he cares about you know uh being a positive role model. He's got some great, great leadership skills that you can just tell by what he the conversation that we had. So make sure you stick around for the next segment, which is up next with my guest, Jose Sanchez. Welcome everyone to segment two of the Liquid Shape Podcast. And I'm very excited today to have my guest, Jose Sanchez, on the show. Welcome to the show, Jose.

SPEAKER_03 54:02

Hey Cody, thank you for having me. I really appreciate it.

SPEAKER_05 54:04

I'm excited that you reached out and we want to share and talk about uh what you do. Your organization, I believe, is called herisu.org. Is that correct?

SPEAKER_03 54:13

That's correct, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 54:13

All right, let's go ahead and tell the uh listeners about your organization and then anything else you want to share with us, and I'll just ask questions along the way.

SPEAKER_03 54:21

Awesome. I appreciate that. And again, thank you for the time. Uh really excited to hop on here with you. So her is us. I guess I'll start with the origin story to give you a little bit of a context and clarity of of what this is. It's so our organization is focused and specializes on female uh empowerment, especially at the youth level, so female athletes specifically. And we started off with uh with flag football, right? So flag football for for women, for girls is is just blowing up across the the world, but definitely here in the United States. That's awesome. The backstory to that is my daughter, so I have three kids. My daughter, Jacqueline, actually today's her birthday. She birthed it to her. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, so I think I'm I'm mourning and celebrating at the same time as a 15 year old. Which is pretty crazy. There's been a lot of uh just reflections and memories the last few weeks as I got ready for today. Although nothing really changed, right? But I I guess at the same time it did. But for her, she she went through a pretty uh tough time in her life about six years ago. And through that journey she found flag football. She had played when she was younger. And back then it wasn't really cool for for girls to play. It was more of a boys' sport and really was kind of a football, tackle football light or or adjacent. And she played after a season, she she gave up or didn't give up, she just moved on to other sports. She played uh volleyball and soccer and then she ran across the country. And then through her her journey of I guess uh I won't say belief like uh self-birth or rebirth, she decided to try a flag again and it was a really challenging sport for her, even though she was an athlete, just the movements and the biomechanics didn't really translate right away. And she never gave up. So she played by the time she reached her sophomore year in high school, uh, which is what she's finished with now, she's probably played about three hundred games between travel Yeah, yeah. Between travel and in high school and wreck. Just staying busy. And it was one of those those things that for her like knowing what she was going through as a human that a lot of people didn't know. So her family was kind of battling in in the shadows and w seeing how much this sport helped her and the sisterhood and the mentorship and all those things. And then peeling back and looking at the the macro view of of this sport in America and true pathways for scholarships, right? Families and and young ladies that didn't really have aspirations of going right to a four-year college now have a way. Right? There there's a way out of a lot of, you know, insert your community here across the US with a lot of those kids around. So for me as a dad, when our chapter closed proudly with gratitude in in a positive way, I I kind of sat in this this state of reflection of, well, what do I do now? Do I let this this skill set go to atrophy and just kind of die out? Or do maybe I accept a calling from God and say, hey, maybe there's kids out there of all walks of life that could use, you know, positive exposure and mentorship and leadership, and maybe we could highlight some heroes across the the US to do this the same great work. So that's that's the origin story of hers. Now we're at a point where we're we're branching out of beyond our local uh communities out in the Bay Area in California. We're gonna actually do a really cool international tour of of free camps to break the barrier of of access and just I guess love and care is what it kind of boils down to. And then we're also gonna branch into soccer and basketball for females.

SPEAKER_05 57:33

I love that. That is that's uh that's so fun and cool you guys are doing that because like you just mentioned, so for me, I've always been in bands. I love sports, but I was just poor growing up and uh we could we couldn't afford to pay the fees and to get all the outfits and all whatnot. But um what I love about playing music is that brotherhood that I have, um, sisterhood even, but because we had we had we've had female bass player before, but that bond, and it's more than just the event that you're doing. It's it's coming together and creating something and doing something as a team and you know, having those the barriers that come in your way of of that, and then finding ways around it. And I think it builds a lot of character when you're working with a team and you know, you have your moments of where you get frustrated with each other and you know, um and what have you. So is this is this something that you guys are doing like regionally, um, when you guys are playing against other teams, or is it uh locally only, or does it expand like um to other states, or how d how does that typically go for when you guys are competing against other teams or when Yeah, it depends on the platform.

SPEAKER_03 58:37

So like for the high school, right, it's local. You're gonna play against your league of of teams that are in our in our high school um area. For club, it it can be all types of things. So for us we have about a two and a half hour radius, three hour radius of our home base, and we'll play on a regular basis by the same ten, twelve teams, but in larger tournaments we'll play 30 teams or 40 teams. It just depends on where they're coming from. And and for flag football, like it is with with baseball or basketball or softball, soccer, right? It's when you get on the road and you're playing essentially all-star teams every weekend. It really helps you benchmark where you are as an athlete, as a coach, as a as a as a family, right? You're kinda getting a car every weekend. So that's more regional, and then for her as us, the the actual organization. Uh we had started off with really just our city at Antioch. It's just it's like a lot of cities across the the country. There's a a different type of demographic. We're gonna have it's it's you know, a suburb of the urban area, and we're gonna have kids that in a lot of cases were forgotten. So that's where this started, and and now we're at a point where we're gonna be in Mexico for two subs on our on our tour, for lack of a better word. And we're gonna be impacting children all across California into Arizona and then in Mexico.

SPEAKER_05 59:44

That's an awesome thing you guys are doing, seriously. I I know that um, especially in some towns, I don't know how uh it is now, but the town I grew up in, there wasn't very much to do in our town. There wasn't very many things you could be involved in, and which leads obviously to the youth finding ways to get into trouble. So getting involved in something like this, something positive that builds character and that helps people like find friends that maybe they they wouldn't have met otherwise. People that they that they may never have become friends with because XYZ, maybe they don't look like them, or maybe they don't dress like them, or maybe they don't act like them, but they come together for this common goal or this common thing that they have, which is their love for a sport like flag football, which is awesome. I think that's really great that you guys are doing that and and it's exciting to hear that you guys are expanding. That's that's really cool.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:30

Yeah, it it's been one of those things I think that the most surprising and maybe it shouldn't have been, is how the community has embraced this. And there's a lot of just amazing people that I think sometimes just need someone to say, Hey, I could be a connector. And I I think that's my superpower is that I could help locks connect that maybe didn't seem so obvious. The world is crazy. There's a lot of things about it that are hard, right? Being an adult is difficult. Being a kid is difficult. But when you're able to to bring together positive, you know, motivated adults into the same, you know, virtual room, if you will, it it's amazing because there's so many people out there that just want want them will be better. I think that a little positivity goes a long way.

SPEAKER_05 1:01:10

I think so too. I mean there there's there's always that you can see look around and yeah, there is a lot of bad, but there are actually is a lot of good too. And it's all about the energy, I think, that you you can put yourself around and how you perceive things and a mind over matter, and there's there's a lot of there's a lot of good around and and it's awesome to hear that there's organizations like yours that are helping the youth out and leading them in a good direction to bring to build character and to to be the good future leaders of the world that we need. What would you say the biggest challenge is right now with getting these organizations together or recruiting people or uh getting like teams together? Is that is it much of a challenge for you guys, or do you is it you have a bunch of hands raising up that want to be a part of it, or how does that uh how do you guys recruit usually for the teams?

SPEAKER_03 1:02:00

Yeah, I I think actually for me the hardest part was coming out of the shadows and and deciding that yes, like I'm going to accept this and I'm going to help build this. And then from there, there's just a lot of people. Of course there's logistics and operations that have to be thought through and executed. But the things that we'll be able to execute in this next three to six months are gonna be incredible. And from there I I think it's really it's knowing when it's too much and accepting that yes, we could accept these next three things, these projects. But perhaps it's okay to wait till twenty-seven or twenty-eight to do that. Um I think my one of my weaknesses is that I love momentum and I and I move very quickly and sometimes that's not great because I look at my my bandwidth and it's it's non-existent. So like for example, yesterday we didn't have a tournament, we didn't have any practices and I decided to not do anything. And that's not like me for those that know me. And I just kind of sat with that for the first couple hours of the day of like, okay, I'm not gonna turn on my laptop today. I'm not gonna I'm gonna actually watch TV for the sake of watching TV, which I don't do very often. And I needed it. I woke up refreshed and it's one of those you know, you you you tell yourself that yes, all there is self-care that I need, but then I also convinced myself there's a lot of need in the world and I could go help that instead. So it was really just accepting and saying, Yes, I'm I'm going to do what I believe I was meant to do, try to change the world in my own little way in our own little sliver of the of this giant, you know, giant vat of of humanity.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:25

I love that. It sounds like you're you're a go-getter, which I love. I'm I'm a go-getter myself. And uh building something from the ground up is always um it's there's always gonna be obviously barriers and people that come in your way that say, like, oh, you can't do that, or why are you doing it? And then you know when you when it starts costing you money or there's people quitting, or you know, there's there's always this unpredictable things that can happen when you're when you're starting to build something and there's doubt. And then when people start seeing that, oh wait, this is actually picking up, oh, there's people that are being involved in this now, and is it starting to grow? Then you get those people that were the non-believers, hopefully, that come on board and they're like, I want to be a part of this, I want to help you. I saw it where when you first had the idea. Have you always been someone that just says, you know what, I'm gonna take this and I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna own it and I'm gonna I'm just gonna go forward with it, or is that something you just kind of uh slowly adapted to, or have you ever owned a business or anything like that that kind of prepared you for something like this?

SPEAKER_03 1:04:20

Or um Yeah. So I've I've worked a litany of jobs and industries, mostly sales and marketing, and then sales market leadership, uh started a business on my own. And it was the pace has never been the issue. It's it's controlled chaos, right? It's frenetic at times. But and then with my own family working around the clock to make sure that everyone was taken care of and loved and cared for and safe. So it was just different doing it in in the community, doing it in a very public forum. Being okay with that, being okay with being known and there's gonna be different types of perceptions or thoughts or opinions, right? And in the world we're in today where everything's a brand, right? Everybody wants to monetize something. That's been the adjustment of okay, I I'm gonna do this and I'm gonna understand that I can't move the same way that I used to because now I do know that I have informed. I do know that I that's there's a responsibility to that. That I don't I don't take lightly because at the end of the day we're working with kids. So everything that I I try to do, everything that I I take on, it's through the lens of a father. How would this fit it? How would this feel if this was happening to my kids? And if the answer is not black and white right away good, then it's probably the wrong decision because you know, we're we're we're parents.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:30

Yeah. Yeah, and I and I love that you have that lens that you're able to relate to that because it's like, okay, how would I want my how would I want how would I react if this was my child that was going through this situation? What uh what would you say like you because I know we all have these days, right, where you almost feel like, okay, everything's getting in the way of me moving this to where I want it to be or trying to block me from us moving this forward. Or some days you just wake up and you're like, you just don't feel like like you're just It's like, why am I doing this? And you're kind of not motivated. Do you ever get those days? And if so, like what snaps you out of it? And how do you talk yourself into, all right, I just gotta, I gotta put, keep pushing, especially today since I don't really feel it.

SPEAKER_03 1:06:13

I don't have a lot of those days. Good. That's awesome. It's not like it's not an ego statement. It's more so that in this in this whole process, I trimmed out a lot of fat, really all the fat in my life. I don't I don't like wasted energy. I love efficiency. It's I guess I'll I'll share this quick story when when I decided to really kind of pivot my own life, my career into community work. There was a a day, it could have been April, it could have been March. I don't know what what month it was, exactly. It was a couple years ago. And I was sitting there and I was watching some some silly show. I think it was days on FX. And it was it's a good show. It's funny, right? I enjoyed it. But I looked outside and it was a gorgeous day. And I thought, what like what am I doing? Like why why am I sitting in this room wasting a perfect Saturday when I could be doing something? It's this epiphany of I'm gonna go help kids or go help the community. It was just I want to go help myself and be h be happy and healthy.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:07:08

I'd I'd gotten out of a relationship and I was single and I wanted I just felt this urge to go be alive. And that's kind of what started this spiral of what don't I need and what do I need right? Doing that pros and cons list of my own life and then living it. You know, I wanna like my motto as a human is that I want to be healthier at 40, then I was at 30, healthier at 50, then I was at four uh forty, and so on. And that gets harder as you age because your body starts to break down. Like now like I'm I'm 40 now and when I walk up and downstairs, my right knee hurts for whatever reason. So I can go work out and I feel fine. It's just those those ordinary movements. So for me, my Achilles heel is is slowing down. And that's it's a hard it it it's in a lot of I I think that's where I have to really reflect and think why do I feel this way? Is it because I truly want to go make it make an impact or is it because I'm just uh maybe for me that level of pace means I don't have to sit still, maybe I don't have to think about something else, I don't have to work on my my my own mindset in a certain way, right? So I have to really start to dissect and and and think through those feelings to what the root causes for me, anyways.

SPEAKER_05 1:08:13

Yeah. I it it's funny a couple of things you said there. So I'm gonna be turning 40 on Friday. Thank you. I I'm I'm feeling I'm feeling what you're saying like right now, because like you're talking about sitting down and then you're like, I I gotta go do something, I want to do something. And then um not too long ago, I was just telling my girlfriend, I'm like, it's funny how it's guys, like when we are not in a relationship and we're not distracted by girlfriends or whatnot, what is it about us that we are like, want to go like I just want to go build something, I want to go, I I want to go run 10 miles right now. I want to do, I want to do something, I want to be involved kickboxing or whatever. And then sometimes we get in relationships and then we get distracted with other things, and then it's you know, we get busy, but then eventually we get we find all like find reasons to get even busier with with things like that. So I'm I I feel like you and I relate on that in a sense because I lately especially I'm like I will find time, even when I know I have like all these things that I have to do. I have the podcast, I have my band, I have my two, three day day jobs that I that I work. I I still will squeeze in like working out or finding another hobby that I want to do, or whatever the case may be, or if I have to go attend a f a family event or something. I will always try to squeeze things in uh just to keep myself busy. And I I feel like the older that I'm getting now, um, the more I feel like I just want to keep doing more and more and keep myself busy. And I don't know if it's like a couple of years ago someone asked me like what I want my legacy to be. And that made me, I I think about that every single day now. I think about like what I want to be remembered for and what my purpose is. And I know that whatever it is that I'm doing, I don't want to be I like I know that I'm not gonna get there by just sitting around and watching TV or scrolling social media. Social media is definitely something that you it's it's it's a part of our lives now, unfortunately. Like where I like there's been so many times where I just wanted to delete my social media. I'm like, I'm just done with it. I don't care for it, but it's a necessary evil to promote my band, to promote uh the podcast and to keep up with friends and family and all that. So it's like, well, I can't get rid of it right now and and I need it to grow the podcast. But I can still limit my time that I use my phone. I can go out and enjoy the sunshine when we have it. Here in Oregon, because I'm in Oregon, we don't get very much sunshine. We're actually the last couple of days we've gotten some sun. Like right now it's it's all sunny outside, and I'm I'm loving it. But it's just it's it's funny how you're saying like you you you were sitting on the couch and thinking, what am I doing here? And I I think about that all the time too when I'm sitting down. I'm like, I I want to do so many different things, and then I think my ADD, ADHD kicks in, and then I'm like trying to do this over here and then do this over here. Do you ever feel like you spread yourself too thin or anything like that with with what what all you you're involved in?

SPEAKER_03 1:10:58

Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. It's yes, yeah. The short answer is yes, but diving in deeper, uh it's something that I I struggle with. I've gotten a little bit better, I think now because there's there's a a mission attached to it, right? So now I know that my North Star is gonna be X, it's gonna be helping grow the sport of flag football, it's gonna help uh provide a safe space and a positive space for young ladies. And then by proxy, helping the families behind them, right? I think when when a child starts to thrive, parents, no matter what walk of life or what they've gone through, they they feel excited and rejuvenated. So if it's not attached, and then also my kids, right? So I have my daughter has two years left of high school after this year, my son has three, then I have my youngest son that's a uh kindergartner. And for them, it's it's helping them grow up. I I used to say to people that the way I parented parented when I was younger was that I wanted to be the type of father that when my parent when my kids reached teenage years in those hard decisions that they would want to have a conversation. And now I'm I'm in that in that period. Like now my kids are in high school, now they are making choices. My daughters and start driving soon. I made a lot of bad choices, like a lot. When I I didn't have parents that I could go to. I didn't feel safe going to and having those conversations. So it's gonna be that post mortem of did I do the the job that I ho I set off to do years ago. So if it's not really attached to my kids or helping kids in general or helping the community that I care about a lot, then it's it's an easy path nowadays. Where before I would I'd be asked to go help with this initiative, go help coach that kid that you know, that group or whatever it might be, or just go hang out. It's a measure of response now because I know there's only some there's only one of me. And and also I feel a responsibility and pressure to install systems to whatever you our organization, our travel club at the high school, but now at at UC Davis at at the university, there has to be some type of foundation that things can run as well if not better without me, ideally better, because that means the impact's being amplified. But if it's just me, then I I did it wrong.

SPEAKER_05 1:13:00

Yeah. Uh, do you have a lot of people involved on the team, on your team that are that are helping like take care of different matters within like the organization, or is it just you, or is it just you and a couple of people, or um do you have a pretty big team that gets behind and they take care of different tasks for the for the Yeah, I wouldn't say it's big or small, it's the right amount, right?

SPEAKER_03 1:13:19

It's the right right amount of people that are mission-aligned and they care and they do a great job of what they do. I've always been a believer even in business. I know I know that I wouldn't love working for me because I I do move from side to side and project to project and I expect perfection immediately. And that's not realistic, but that's really the way that I I judge myself as a human. So being able to surround myself with people that are of different walks of life and different skill sets and way of thinking and challenging what uh what I believe. And maybe I was right, maybe I was wrong, but I think the the the debate and conversation is super important in in humanity. So we have a great team of people that care deeply, and everyone comes with their own skill set and they're able to help uh generate amazing results.

SPEAKER_05 1:14:01

I love that. Yeah, you you have to sometimes I always tell people that you know when you're working in a team, especially when you you all have different beliefs and different upbringings and and what have you, um, as long as you are there for the the ultimate goal, right? Finding the people that are great at this task to handle those tasks. And maybe where they're not they're not so great, someone else that is good in that area can come and fill that that spot. And that's kind of what I've I I've found with uh my project as far as like the band stuff. Like there's some guys that just do not do social media in the band, so I handle it. But then there's guys that are in the band that like are really great about handling doing videography or the audio side of things, and so I rely on them for that. And it's like when you're working with a team of people, I that's why I love I love working with a group of people because you can you can learn from them, and then utilizing your skills that you're great at, they can maybe learn from you, and and it's a given back and forth thing. And so I I think that's awesome. So do you guys do you guys get involved as far as like getting like sponsorships for some of these kids to get into colleges that maybe they wouldn't be able to get into, or do you guys have some sort of programs like foundation things like that that you guys kind of build upon as well?

SPEAKER_03 1:15:13

We do, yeah. So so on the athletic side of it, the actual athletes themselves, a lot of what we do is focusing is focused on connecting those dots, creating that pathway, right? So it starts with the athlete and them taking care of themselves and learning what it means to be an athlete. It's a different walk of life, it's lonely, right? I'm sure like with in your world, being an artist, people that are true artists and want to make a career out of it have to live a certain way because it's a different it's it's a skill that you develop and it's a passion. So for us with with our high school kids and even you know eighth grade or seventh graders, it's helping show them that there is a path that uh having role models that are 17, 18 years old that are going through the process themselves, connecting them with college coaches, making sure that their academics are on par. So for now, for flag football the way it is now, if you don't have a high three, eight, four, uh, for GPA, it's a lot harder to achieve those goals. Um, so if someone's struggling with uh geometry or with biology, whatever, chemistry, it's providing the academic support as well, making sure that they have a a resource that they could they could tap into to help. And then as far as our programs, everything we try to do, we want to make it free. I believe in whatever I touch, it should be an experience. It could be as simple as a practice, it could be as grand as a as a giant tournament. It's the experience. When you show up there, how are you gonna walk away feeling? And that's from all the lenses, right? That's from the the camper or the athlete that's attending it, how do the families feel? How do our coaches, how do our athletes feel? How does the community feel after it's done? You know, where the did they feel like it was a job well done and and memorable? So that's where for us partnering with organizations, parking uh with businesses, uh securing sponsorship to help uh create these events and make them what they they can be is really important. So I have an amazing, he's one of my best friends, he handles our business development. So a big part of it. He has a day job, but part of what he does and wherever he finds spare time is to go talk to to organizations that have budgets for those and help uh secure funding so we do it. And also grant writing. So there's a whole lot of things that we do, and that's where having the the right number the right uh uh team that have the right skills comes in super handy.

SPEAKER_05 1:17:17

I love that. So for the the the kids that uh do join on these teams, is there typically like a screening process or tryouts that they have to do, or do you guys just accept any kids that that apply to to be on the team and to be a part of it?

SPEAKER_03 1:17:32

Yeah, so so it's like for our club, for example, our travel flag club, uh we started with I think it was we had 70-ish uh young ladies that tried out for three teams. Uh we ended up uh starting off with 47 kids, and now six months later we're up to almost 80 kids. And we've had a number of, I'd say anywhere from 15 to 30 families reach out wanting to join. And at some at this point it's more just of a of a resource and bandwidth issue, right? Uh but we expanded to have a third high school team where it's gonna be high potential eighth graders and and freshmen. And uh it's flag football is such a unique world because it's new. And a lot of these kids either didn't play sports or they played other sports. So every rep matters. It's the the things some of the things that we teach and we we train are what you would teach a seven-year-old tackle player, right? Just a receiver. The skills you learn growing up. Like I grew up playing baseball. So it'd be like having someone who's never played baseball before when they're sixteen saying, Hey, learn and now go get a scholarship. It's it's really hard uh to to play catch up in that way. So uh yeah, we had we started with under fifty, we're up uh we're up around eighty now. And I would expect that this time next year we'll be well over 120, 130 kids uh across our program. I love that.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:41

That's that's awesome to hear, and it's it's it's exciting to see like that it there's it's growing. Um I always loved flag football when I was growing, growing up, and we had it in our high school. Um we played it during PE. We didn't have like like actual teams and whatnot. Um it was it was fun.

SPEAKER_03 1:18:56

What do you what do you think has really made it um such a popular thing all of a sudden and made it kind of Yeah, I I think I think if you look at the the whole situation or the the sport itself, I think that part of it is that not every family wants their kids to play tackle, right? I think that's understandable. If my son didn't play ta tackle until he got to high school, he could have probably played a couple years earlier, but you know, he wasn't ready or I wasn't ready to let him one of the two, maybe both. And for women, for females, I think that it's there has been this growing movement of females can do amazing things. And when you watch flag football with girls, it's different. It's own sport. It's sure there's things schematically that are gonna be anchored to tackle football. Flag football, especially with with females, it's fast paced, it's elegant, but it's also aggressive at the same time. And it's about space, so it's about putting your best athletes in space, and then now it becomes leverage and angles. I I'm a nerd, so I love it because it's a lot of math. Yep. And I think that I would expect that when the twenty eight Olympics come and go, this is like we're still so early in this process. After the Olympics, after I would imagine it's gonna be probably US and Mexico in the in the final for for the the gold medal, it's gonna be incredible. I think at that point we'll have hopefully over half of the states and the country have its sanctioned high school sports. On the West Coast, here we're playing catch up. A lot of the universities and colleges that offer flag as collegiate sport are gonna be back east and the southeast and the northwest and the midwest. Even in Southern California, LA is is miles ahead of where we are. They're probably two years ahead as far as the talent development and just the the style of play that we are in the Bay Area. So it it's the whole the whole country is starting to to calibrate itself. It's a really exciting time.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:42

That is really cool. I I didn't realize how big of a sport it is, but that's that's awesome to hear that it's growing and the interest for it, and then you know, giving the ladies a chance to do play football, because you know, I I know a lot I know football's football's become a lot more popular now and and and liked. Back when I was growing up, I know it wasn't as popular with the ladies, but now it seems like sports in general just women love it. So why why not have have an opportunity for them to be able to play it and and what have you? Do you do you ever find it like I I kind of want to get more on your your leadership and and your skills and whatnot? How do you ever find it where you are struggling with motivating somebody that is there, or is everyone kind of that's there like full on, hey, I want to do this and I'm gonna do whatever it takes to learn and to just be be good at it and improve? Do you ever run into those challenges where someone just shows up or they kind of don't show up or you know they kind of are are are half in, half out?

SPEAKER_03 1:21:40

Yeah, absolutely. And and I think that's the hard part there is assessing, is it okay to to project my own beliefs or ethics or or drive onto somebody else? And is it o do I have to demand things to be at my pace all the time? And sometimes the answer is yes. And that's something that i if it's something that I I built from the ground up and I know why I did this, then yes. It's like being head coach of a team or being a GM of an organization that or a vice president of corporate America, right? You're the president of whatever it is of sales. And you you're setting strategy and now your team's gonna go execute the tactics. So that does happen. Now the difference being that a lot of these positions are volunteer uh are volunte uh voluntary, right? You're you're volunteering your time because you care. So I think that for me is the the process that I I try to to really dive into and reflect on is they mean well, they're they're well intentioned and they're giving their time. So they they must care, right? And I and I believe that this person, man or woman, is a good person or they even wouldn't be involved in this initiative to begin with. So now it's trying to figure out how do I connect with them and what are the n the non-negotiables, right? Or what are the things that we must do and here's why. And then from there it's trying to find a way. And that's that can be tricky because adults are adults, right? We we all know we all know best and we all have our own egos and and we're prideful. And that can be a challenge. But I I do think that it becomes pretty clear as long as you're you're you're clear and transparent. And I think that's what I try to do. And maybe I I may not be the most liked person in that moment or moments, but hey, this is what we're doing, and here's why we're doing it. And if you're part of this, it has to be this way as far like I don't care how we get there, as long as we're under the same umbrella. And when you're and you're not aligned in you know the the macro view of it, then unfortunately, you know what? This this probably isn't the best fit for it for you or for me, and that's okay. I'm sure you'd be super happy elsewhere. And it's gonna be a place that, you know, you could do better, please do go off and start your own thing and help more kids. I love that. That'd be amazing for the whole community. But it's not gonna be here today.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:39

Yeah, no, that's that's true. And it I mean it's it can be a slap in the face for the other folks that are involved that are putting in the work and putting in, you know, sacrificing their their time to to try to help. And then when you have like kind of dead weight, so to speak, it does make everyone it's kind of like it's kind of like when you have someone doing something that they're they shouldn't be doing or they're slacking somewhere, then it kind of spreads because then people are like, well, so and so doesn't do that, so why should I have to do that? Or maybe I don't want to do this, and then before you know it, like it's just chaos. And and you're right, it's it's hard because these people are volunteering and it's not like a job like where you can be like, all right, you're fired because you're not performing. And so it does make it challenging. I I can relate that to being in a band, just because you know, or you're not necessarily getting paid. There's not really much money in in being in a band, you're doing it because you love it and the passion and and whatnot. So it it can be frustrating to try to get people motivated and reminding them here's why we're here. And if you know everyone else is pulling their weight and you're not, you know, then you gotta you gotta go f figure out if you really want to be here or if you'd be happier somewhere else.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:46

So on that note, I think I try to be I try to communicate and express my gratitude often. And it's it's not something that's a checkbox like, oh, I should do this because it's today. If I truly feel that way. I feel I I know that I couldn't do a fraction of what I do if it wasn't for these amazing people. And as often as I can, it's just a simple thank you and I appreciate you. I try to say that as much as I can. And remind people that even if we have friction, that when that when that ends, hopefully quickly, it you know, it dissipates that I remind them like, hey, I I truly appreciate and and having a r a reason for it, not just that that fake statement of, Oh, I appreciate you, you know, thanks so much. When you do this, thank you so much. Yeah. Uh and the other part too is recognize that that sometimes I don't have to be the one running whatever that is. You know, it could be as simple as winner coaching. Maybe I don't have to run the offense, right? And that's like I love offense, I love I love the the chess snatch that goes with that. But someone might have a great idea, right? And empowering those around you and helping them fail along the way, struggle. It's no different than an athlete, it's no different than you know, when I was I'm in the business world and you're taking on that new trainee and you're trying to mentor them and they're gonna mess up. Right. So like a saying that I I my sister actually t told me this years ago from one of her past work experiences, uh, that her boss told her to find new and creative ways to F up every day. Right. You know, so don't make the same mistake over and over again. Find new and creative ways. And and I love it and I've used it, I use it often. That's probably one of the most common sayings that I I tell athletes. They go, hey, let's mess up today, but let's find new and exciting ways to do that. If I do the same exact thing, because that means you're being coachable, right? You're out of your your uh your comfort zone. And for adults, it's I think it's harder for adults, it's harder for us to because it does. I I I solicit feedback often, but I'm gonna know on it after a while. I'm gonna think, like, yeah, is that how I behaved, or did I miss that, or was I right or wrong? And I and I really want to critique myself, but it's still hard, right? When someone tells you you didn't do a good job, it's it's not easy. Like the mentors I had as a coach, there weren't a lot of warm and fuzzies, but they were amazing coaches. So I've I've learned through through the turbulence of what it means to be an effective coach or what it means to run a high functioning you know unit. So it's fine that balance of of yes, there's a no-nonsense approach to what we do. However, live with empathy, because maybe if I bark at someone the wrong way the wrong time, I don't know what they what they just came from, right? I don't know what's going on in their personal life. You know, maybe they just got crappy and used on the phone. Maybe they just had a hard day at work. And I think it's important to have that human connection to be able to overcome those those friction points that are gonna happen in any relationship.

SPEAKER_05 1:27:22

Yeah, you you make a good point in that. And and just thinking back, like it's like you're not just mentoring it, you're not almost you're not just uh helping the kids and the community, you're helping these these other folks that you know are your peers in developing their skills and helping them grow as people as well. Like that's that's pretty cool, man. Like I like I I respect that. And I always love talking to people that are in leadership roles because I've that's how I've learned. I've I've always worked in corporate jobs and uh I pick up anything that I can pick up from other people that I can apply to my life or apply to my band or my businesses. I like to do that just because I don't feel like I have the answers to everything. If anything, I like being that guy that asks the questions, even if it may seem stupid to me, like I always think if I'm thinking it, someone else out there is likely thinking it as well. And I'd rather ask the question and get the answer than to just hold on to it and and come off as a a know it all or anything like that. It just I have no problem asking asking those important questions. So let's see, what what else do you do? Do you are do you are is this your your full-time job or are you also doing other do you uh also do like other uh careers?

SPEAKER_03 1:28:30

Yeah, so it's it's begin it's becoming that. And that I think it's gonna become that by the end of this year 100%. Um my other day job is is in sales, so business development. I do some consulting uh as well. And the goal is that in the next, you know, next few months that everything we've done that that I I've been building for the last year will will create the ability to to really get in the community even deeper and and help. So I think it's that that old adage of you know you do well by doing good. And I think if you do it honestly, Yarma's a real thing. And I believe that it pays off and and it's it's something that you could create a sustainable ecosystem, you know, for your family by doing great things. I love that.

SPEAKER_05 1:29:05

That's that's so cool. Build building something up from the ground up is always so rewarding when you when you see it grow and then you also see that you're touching people's lives in a very positive way that I guarantee you that these kids are gonna remember this, like these experiences and and hopefully they take these uh these coachings and and what have you and and are able to apply them in in their life. Um I've always thought that sports are a great way to get folks, you know, prepared for the real world because you know you have your barriers, you have your ups and downs, you have to learn to play well with others, being uh a good sportsman. Have you had any issues as far as injuries or anything like that that have happened in flag football? Nothing nothing severe.

SPEAKER_03 1:29:44

I there there's definitely bumps and bruises and and sprains and those types of things, but thankfully nothing that is life altering. I do worry about that, especially as sport evolves at the high school level, the college level. It it is there is contact. I mean, there's blocking. And anyone that says play like a girl, like that's a compliment because it's like these young ladies and women are just absolute dogs. Like they they with a reckless abandon at times, and it's something that you think, Oh god, I hope that that you know the worst doesn't happen. But I think it there will be some major injuries just by you know, just probabilities of of the number of reps and the level of athletes. But these girls are in the gym. They're they're lifting weights in high school regularly. Like that's part of the regimen. They are attacking their training the way that tackle football players do. They're really it's just that they don't have pads, which is frightening on its own.

SPEAKER_05 1:30:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:30:36

So that's something that that we we really try to to do, to model as an organization. It's gonna be dental health, right? Mouth guards, it's gonna be uh head protection, having five-star head protection available for for our athletes, but also helping spread that throughout the community. Because I think the way that we got here was part of the concussion sphere with with tackle sports, with tackle football. And I think if we're not mindful of that, we could be in the same road 20 years down the line. So you know, I'm not saying we're gonna change the world in that way, but I could at least uh try to do our best to keep kids safe that are gonna be within our our umbrella.

SPEAKER_05 1:31:11

Yeah, I was gonna I was gonna ask, um, is there headgear involved at all in this? Because I know that with back in the day, at least uh the way we played um in PE was you're running full speed, you're ducking and dodging, you're trying to do spins to keep people away from like grabbing your flags, you're stiff ironing them or whatever. Uh but there's there would be people that would like get hurt just from just them alone from like trying to dodge or whatever and then flipping in some mud or what have you. Um and I could easily see how someone bump heads if they're you know not looking in the right direction or whatever.

SPEAKER_03 1:31:43

Um do you guys have any headgear that you guys use right now, currently, with the way that you guys play or yeah, so there's a lot of different manufacturers out there, and and I'm sure most of them have great things, great features and benefits. Uh so we we partner with Seismic. That's one of the it's the a bit of a leading manufacturer in that space, and there's a lot of science that goes into how and why the impact absorbs through their their headband. And that's something that that whatever initiative or project I'm working on, we try to partner with them and say, hey, like, you know, how do we get involved? How do we get these two families at an affordable price? Because again, that goes back to flag is more accessible than tackle is because you have less equipment and it's gonna be it's gonna be less expensive. However, some things are that they're a want, they're not a need, but sometimes maybe the want should be a need, especially when it comes to player safety.

SPEAKER_05 1:32:31

Yeah, one of the things that I always think about uh too is like when you're coaching a team, there's always gonna be at least that that parent or that whatever that like gets really into it and gets really upset with the coaching that you potentially do. And I know you said that you um try to think of what if this was my kid and that they're in that situation. Um do you ever have anyone that just gets super upset with whatever you maybe said trying to help the the the athletes, you know, by providing them with feedback or coaching and they're just kind of all upset because XYZ or they didn't like the way your tone was or what you said or anything like that?

SPEAKER_03 1:33:07

Yeah, it it happens, right? It the more you know you play ten shows, you're gonna have a few unhappy fans. And for us, it's it's no it's no different. I think it it's well, maybe it it's not different. Maybe it it's it stinks as much for me as it does for you when someone doesn't like music. I'm I'm not sure I I don't have that talent. I wish I did. It does, it sucks. Yeah, and it's it's one of so for for like again, non-negotiables, right? I try there's certain things we can control and we can't control. Attitude and effort, right? You c you can control as a human being when you wake up how much you're gonna give that day, right? And then how are you gonna go? What is your mindset in that day? And of course we all go like I've gone through depression, I've gone through overcoming a bunch of trauma from my childhood and early adulthood. I've wor I've worked at it. But at the end of the day, I still make that choice to how I'm gonna approach today. And there's days that I'm exhausted and I and I don't necessarily want to do that thing, but I still find a way to try to put myself in that right mindset. Now we're talking about youth athletes. So we're talking about twelve year olds to seventeen year olds and their kids, right? Their brains haven't fully formed that they they don't understand um how to essentially impact their mindset on a day-to-day basis. You you if you trust the system and you trust that the coaches are are well intentioned and they they're there to help you and really a coach is there to push you out of your comfort zone to some degree and and try to help you achieve that next the next level of potential, then it should work well. But with that said, yeah, uh we've had we've had parents that aren't necessarily happy. They don't like the way that we coach, they don't like the way that we the expectations we demand or the communications that that we we expect from our our athletes. And I try to hear and listen and and understand what the feedback is, understand what the concern is, try to get to the root cause. But sometimes it's it's just not the right fit. Right. And and that's the beauty of of sports. There's so many different types of coaches, so many types of programs and organizations that maybe sometimes it it is simple as what we expect is not what that child or that family needs in that moment. And that's okay. Like I'm okay with that. Because at the end of the day, there's gonna be a lot of people that do want and and I what I tell my coaches because it does, like it hurts it hurts our feelings. I'm not afraid to say that I'm I'm an adult man. No, for sure. But but it does. It's like when someone says, I don't like the way you did this and you coached this and it's not for me, okay. But at the end of the day, if the effort and attitude aren't aligned with our our mission, then that's a non-negotiable. And that's something that, you know, again, going back to the make mistakes in creative ways, but if the same mistake you're making is going to be attitude and effort, then at some point, hey, you know what? That's not that's not gonna be good for us. It doesn't it's not a good match. Nothing against you, nothing against us. However, for this specific structure, what we're building here, that's a non-negotiable for us.

SPEAKER_05 1:35:50

I love that. Yeah, and it's it's always easier to criticize others when you're just sitting back and you're not put in that position. It's kind of like anyone that's in a leadership role, if you're a manager or CEO of of a place, you know, you know what needs to happen and what the ultimate goal is and why you're doing certain things, but uh the general public or people just see like this, you just made this decision and everyone's all up in arms and like, well, why did you do that? They don't realize all the behind-the-scenes things that are going on or that drove to that decision. So it's always easier just to criticize and get upset about things like that. And I try to remind myself even that in my day-to-day like life when I'm when something happens that I'm not happy with, it's like, I'm sure there was a lot of thought put into this before this decision was made, and I'm not seeing it all, you know, I can get upset, but how far am I gonna take that? Am I gonna go scream at somebody that's delivering the message that that has nothing to do with why the decision was made and they're just the the messenger, or am I just gonna be like, okay, well, how do I make this, how do I adapt to this change and just move forward? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:36:52

And on that note, uh, just to add to it, I've spent more time in the last 12 months really studying and researching how to connect different types of of youth athletes, especially female athletes, because the modern the modern athletes are different. The way that they the way that most kids when I say everything, most kids process information is very different than the way that even uh a child ten years ago would have done things, right? Expectations are very different. The way you communicate, it's it is a different world. And for me, it's like you said earlier that sports or or music, it's it's a platform, it's it's a way in to develop other skills. And at some point athletics are gonna end. Right? It might end at high school, might end at college, might end at the professional, but at some point your life does go to that next chapter. So when when there's a a child that's struggling within our program, that means a lot to me. That means I I deeply care about that and I do think like how can I help connect with that that that child in a positive way and help them through that. Because and may maybe I'm unique, maybe I'm not, but I always think about if this isn't gonna work for them and they care about this, if they're already struggling with emo mental health, what's this gonna lead them to? Right? Again, going thinking as a father, if my daughter's going through X, Y, and Z and now she's going to play flag 'cause she loves it, but if that becomes toxic for her or or somewhere that's not positive, then that's not great. That's either now you're you're adding even more salt to the wood, right? Oh yeah. And I tell that to like well, I remember speaking with a middle school team maybe six months ago around there. And these these young ladies were just they're amazing humans, but they're from a varied background. You know, some you know, single parent homes, some are struggling. So a lot of them are probably just growing up and not being raised, right? It's it's that kind of child. And and I now because there is this hope of a scholarship or a way out of your situation, my message to them was if this isn't fun, we're doing this wrong. You're doing this wrong. It doesn't have to be easy. It's gonna be hard. It should be hard because that means you're growing. But if you are if you don't enjoy this, if you don't enjoy the the push and and the drive that that is is expected of you, it's wrong. Because then when this becomes unfortunate and it becomes difficult, you're gonna quit this too. And then what are you left with? Right. And that's the part I think that that if there's a message for for coaches across, you know, or just humans, adults, is I I'm gonna be a little preachy, but we have to recognize that children today are different for a lot of reasons. And if we don't adjust the way that we approach coaching or mentorship or or leadership, I think we're doing kids a disservice in a dangerous way.

SPEAKER_05 1:39:29

100%. I until you said that, I didn't even really think about that. I always think like I think about when I was a kid and how kind of things were and how I interpreted information and how I took it, but that was so many years ago. That was, you know, 30 something years ago when I was a I was a I was a kid and the times have changed so much. And I'm hoping that people that work with kids, I don't have any kids of my own, I have my nephew, but I know that um, for example, like he's very sensitive. So I the way that I used to joke around with my friends growing up at his age is very different from what kids are like now, and especially with uh with you know everything that's going on around the world and how they take information. Just I feel like kids are are so much smarter now at a very young age. Like my my nephew is six years old, and the fact that he can work some of these games he's playing and on uh on YouTube and able to just the like some of the things that he's able to do. I'm just like six years old, I wouldn't know what the heck I was doing. Unless I was born with an iPad in my hand or anything. But it's important to remember, like, yeah, you can reflect on some things, some things will never change, but a lot of things have changed. Uh and I think it's awesome work what you're doing, helping, helping out the community and giving a place for these kids to develop these skills that are going to help them be future, hopefully the O's of companies and you know, who knows, maybe they get into politics, maybe they become some huge celebrity in some way, form, or fashion. And these skills and sports, you know, that they're they're preparing them for the real world when they're out there working, when they're out there dealing with other folks and and what have you. What drove you to what initially drove you to want to be involved in leadership? Not necessarily in like this program that you started, but like have you always had that since you were younger? Or at what point are you like, you know what, I really like this. I like leading people. I like I like uh because it sounds like you have a lot of experience in it, and it sounds like it's really well thought out, like how you make your decisions and and just how you word everything. So I'm just curious, like what what was the point that influenced you that you're like, you know, what regardless if it's my job or something I do on the side, I want to be involved in leadership.

SPEAKER_03 1:41:37

Yeah, so for for me, it it was a completely different, opposite motivation. So I was born in Mexico. Uh we immigrated to the US when I was two. We were as illegal as they can. We we back back in the eighties, it was a different world and you didn't have to, you know, walk. We literally drove across the border. I don't think I've actually ever shared the story publicly, but why not? And it was something that my dad used to ingrain in my sister and I, you tell me, that you have to be twice as as good as a white person to be considered half half half of them, right? It's not even equal, but just and and that's I I had such a deep chip on my shoulder because of the way I was raised. But also my dad was my age when we came to the US. So imagine being forty years old, being affluent in your own space, being successful, you know, looking at retirement just down the road and the economy crashes and I have to start all over again. Brand new country. He was call uh college educated, but now his degrees don't mean anything here. And he's working a remedial job, right? And but he he built himself back up. So that was I understand the the context and and the why, the pressure he was under. And for a lot of my younger life, I used to think like, well, if my dad did that, then what's my excuse? Right. I I just suck it up and go. And then for me it was chasing titles, it was chasing raise, it was being a manager, a director, a vice president, a CEO, you know, all these things. And I just wanted to make money. And for me it was making money proved that I was as good or better than. And that's why I love sales, was because sales was a a a world that you you could quantify how good you were, right? Or at least I could justify it to myself that there's a number, there's a number associated with it. And I I'm 5'11, I was never destined to go play professional anything. And I knew that. But sales was my arena. That's where I can go and just do do you know what I can do and prove it. And I was arrogant and all those things. Between my divorce uh after seven and a half years of my ex-wife, and then understanding that, oh wow, fatherhood is a privilege. It's not it's not a guarantee. And then I once sent out my kids and I don't have them, like that was sobering. But even that wasn't enough. That that didn't change me. Now I just you know dug in deeper, like I'm gonna be a great dad when I have my kids, then I'm gonna go and chase more prestige and whatever bucket I want to put in, you know, when I don't have them. And then we went through a lot of stuff. And I had a lot of childhood trauma, a lot of things just when I when I woke up one day and realized like, whoa boy, the way I was raised was not, you know, normal. And it was a different time, right? I think if we're the same age, it was just different back then the way the parents they they did it the best they knew how. Yeah. So a as I went through that process and I at one point I was the CEO of two companies at the same time. I don't think most people know this, but I was. I was traveling every week to LA and and I made a lot of money, but my life wasn't any better. And it that was kind of this thought of like, wow, okay, this is interesting. Like I'm I'm I don't have more issues, I don't have more problems. But the things that I thought were going to change for the better really haven't. So as I I really worked on myself for years. I went through a deep depression for over a year. I went through uh a separation of relationships. I was not the best person to be around during that span. When I got through that, I woke up with a lot of gratitude. I grew woke up with very humbled, absolutely very, very humbled. And then wanting to make a difference. So leadership's always been there. I think the why changes. Maybe my why will change in five years or ten years as I as I get older and learn more. But it started off with just a deep anger, hurt, and security to where now I don't I don't I don't give an F what someone thinks of me. I really don't, because I know that my intentions are pure and it makes my life a whole lot easier because you know what, you may not like me and that's okay, but and you may not know my story, and that's okay. You may know my story, and that's okay. Because you're you're entitled to your own opinion, and as long as the kids that we're serving their families are happy and taken care of, you know what, the rest will take care of itself.

SPEAKER_05 1:45:29

Like like you said, we did grow up in a in a separate time, and I I love how you said that my dad at 40 was here and made all this possible. And what's my excuse? Like sometimes our parents can uh really have an impact on us. Oh, they always do, obviously. Um, for better or for worse, I I grew up in an alcoholic with an alcoholic dad. Uh, but then I also had my grandma who was a very hard worker. She was from Mexico as well, and she raised nine kids by herself because my grandpa left her. And I always think of back how hard of a worker she was, and that she didn't speak any English, she only spoke Spanish, she was out in the field working to raise nine kids, never got remarried. So she was very independent. And then on top of raising nine kids, she started raising the grandchildren, including myself and my brother. And she just instilled hard work in us. Like when we were when she would take us and make us uh go do yard work, but it it made me now where I'm like, hard work doesn't bother me. I like it. I I love hard work. I wake up, I wake up at 4 30 every morning and get ready for work. I work out every day. Uh uh, I don't take any days off myself. And it's like I always stop and think, I'm like, I I got this from my grandma because being raised by her and just seeing her do all that stuff, she kind of just she ingrained that in my brother and I where it's just work's not something that you should dread. You have goals and whatnot, it's it's it's a sweat. And I love how you said that even when you were making all this money, maybe things weren't bad, but they weren't any better. And so you realize that money's not everything. It's and as I I think I as we get older, because I feel the same way too. I've I've made money. I remember being able to throw a bunch of money in my savings account constantly, and I wasn't any happier. If anything, I was going, I was spiraling even worse because I was drinking a lot and partying and you know, just destroying my life with the more the more money I had, um, the more I was getting into trouble and just going down this this uh dark hole of of being unhappy. And getting sober was obviously a huge impact for me to start seeing the things that that matter, like loving my friends and family and cutting off the bad, toxic people and wanting to live with purpose and leave a legacy behind and helping others and being involved where you make an impact on other people. I think that's that's huge, and that's how I want to be remembered. No one's gonna care if you are the richest person in the world or any of that. They're not gonna that's not I wouldn't want to be remembered for that. You know, it's it's it's like you said, those experiences and those influences that you have on these people, these future leaders of the world. So I I just want to say personally, Jose, thank you so much for what you do. I think what you're doing is awesome, and I'm excited for you for your business to grow. And thank you for being on the podcast today and sharing your story with us. Where can folks find your organization if you don't mind sharing your socials and websites? And and we'll make sure and include them in the description of the podcast when this posts next week as well.

SPEAKER_03 1:48:23

Thank you, Cody. It's it's been an absolute honor and pleasure. I really enjoyed our conversation. So our website is her isus.org. So someone could hop on there and learn what we're doing and what we're gonna be taking care of in this next uh rest of this year. And then on Instagram, I could be found at Coach J H Sanchez.

SPEAKER_05 1:48:41

Awesome. Are you guys on uh TikTok or Facebook or anything like that?

SPEAKER_03 1:48:45

We're on Facebook, not TikTok yet. That is something that I am I'm battling my my inner want not to do, uh, but I think I I think I need to at some point, or I think I'll I think I'll delegate that to some of this more quick because I don't know where to start. I'll I see the girls dancing and doing all these things, and that that's not really my speed.

SPEAKER_05 1:49:02

I hear you on that, man. I I myself am there. I barely started one for the podcast. I've had it my personal one, and then I have my band one, and even those like they're on the backbone because I don't understand it. I don't understand how it properly works, but I know it's a necessary evil, unfortunately. So thank you so much for being on the podcast, man. I appreciate it. And everyone, please go check out check out Jose's organization, check him out on Facebook or sorry, on uh Instagram. Um, and thank you for being here, man. Yeah, thank you so much, Cody. I appreciate it. And that is the end of segment two. Thank you guys all so much for tuning in this week to the podcast. I love, love, love how you guys are coming in and showing up for the questions of the week. Sometimes I worry that no one's gonna care and say anything. And if you don't, guess what? Cody's got a big mouth and Riot is too, so we can we can talk. We can talk if we have to. So if you don't respond, we're gonna talk anyways.

SPEAKER_01 1:49:54

You just listen to our ADHD rants.

SPEAKER_05 1:49:56

Yeah, those are pretty interesting in themselves. But thank you. All for tuning in. Thank you guys for participating and being a part of this. Thank you all who regularly listen to us. Big shout out to our monetary sponsors out there, King John and Eric Sheets. Shout out and big props to you guys. Everyone out there, please, if you have a dollar, two dollars, three dollars, whatever, if you can contribute to the podcast on a monthly basis, we would really appreciate it. It helps us to stay keep the lights on for the podcast because these editing softwares and these uploads and all that, they all cost money, every single one of them. So it does help us pay towards that at least. And we have the podcast by the people for the people. And so if you're not able to, that's fine. Just keep sharing the podcast. We are right now, Mariah. I don't know if I've shared this with you, but we we we recently I've been looking here and we have been expanding. Like right now, we are at let me see, all time 622 downloads of the podcast, and we are in 30 countries, 148 cities. That is so fucking cool, man. I that's exciting. It's spreading. It is spreading. 30 countries? I've I've only been to America, obviously, and Mexico. And we're in we're in 28 other countries that we've never been to. Thank you. Pretty cool. So everyone, thank you guys so much for tuning in. Spread the word about the Liquid Shape podcast. Again, American Overdose released a new single slash video for My Endless Battle. Go check that out. It's all about mental health and dealing with uh suicide awareness. And it's an acoustic song, so it's not your typical American Overdose song of screaming and heaviness and all that. It is acoustic, it's heartfelt, it's words that matter. Not that our other songs don't, but this one is really, it ties to your heart and it ties to things that folks can can relate to. So go check out the video. It's available on all major streaming platforms along with YouTube for the video. Thank you guys all for your support with the Liquid Shape Podcast. And I love you all. Tune in next week.

SPEAKER_01 1:51:55

Love you. Bye.

SPEAKER_02 1:51:56

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