Grace in the Breaking

Episode 21: Forgiveness, Freedom, And Learning to Love Again.

• Elizabeth Everett

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In this powerful episode of Grace in the Breaking, Elizabeth Everett shares a raw and biblical conversation on divorce recovery, Christian healing, forgiveness, trauma, abusive relationships, emotional healing, identity in Christ, and learning to love again after heartbreak. This faith-based podcast episode dives deep into how God never intended His children to remain in physically abusive relationships, emotionally destructive marriages, toxic cycles, addiction-based relationships, or unequally yoked covenants. Through scripture, testimony, deliverance-focused teaching, and biblical encouragement, listeners will learn how forgiveness unlocks healing, how bitterness keeps people spiritually bound, and how surrendering pain to God leads to peace, restoration, freedom, and renewed purpose. If you are struggling with divorce, betrayal, rejection, trauma, grief, codependency, emotional wounds, or fear of trusting again, this Christian podcast teaching will remind you that your worth is found in Jesus Christ alone and that God still restores broken lives.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you forget. It means you stop letting the pain control your future. Freedom begins when bitterness breaks and healing starts. Learn how to forgive, heal, and love again through Christ. 🎙️ Listen to the latest episode of the Grace in the Breaking podcast available on all major platforms. Like, share, review, and send this to someone who needs freedom today. 

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Healing and Forgiveness After Divorce: Embracing God's GraceDiscover hope and biblical strategies for healing from the trauma of divorce, betrayal, and abuse. Elizabeth Everett shares powerful insights on overcoming emotional wounds, forgiving biblically, and reclaiming your identity in Christ. This episode is a compassionate guide for those seeking spiritual and emotional restoration.

  • The importance of biblical forgiveness and emotional healing
  • Recognizing the difference between hardship and abuse
  • The impact of unhealed wounds and cycles of trauma
  • Building relationships on spiritual alignment and covenant
  • The power of renewing your mind with scripture
  • Understanding true love versus manipulation or trauma bonds
  • How God restores your worth and purpose after betrayal
  • Practical steps for releasing resentment and walking in freedom
  • The role of grace and God's mercy in your healing journey
  • Resources for inner growth and community support

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Contact Elizabeth Everett:                                                                                               Website: graceinthebreaking.com                                                                          Email: info@graceinthebreaking.com                                                                        Instagram: @graceinthebreaking                                                                                YouTube: @GraceintheBreaking 

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SPEAKER_00

Hey friends, hey family, Elizabeth here. On today's episode, we're going to talk about learning to love again with forgiveness and with freedom. If you've ever walked through a season in your life from betrayal, from abuse, you need to take a listen. This is going to hit the hearts of those that have gone through divorce. We're not perfect, but healing, healing is your portion. You weren't meant to hold on to all of these detrimental emotions. So sit back, get your notepad, and be ready to start your healing journey today. This is Grace and the Breaking. Today's episode is about struggling after divorce, learning how to overcome that emotional trauma biblically, recover from that abuse, learn how to forgive, learn how to trust again, quit carrying the shame, and move from spiritual exhaustion into the land of milk and honey. This is a conversation about biblical forgiveness, what it means for you, and how to get there, how to emotionally heal through Jesus Christ, get yourself delivered from bitterness, overcome the toxic relationships, and heal from the trauma in God's way. This is a reminder today of your identity in Christ, that you are a son or daughter, that you're called and chosen for a time such as this. And we're gonna learn how to surrender every bit of that pain that you're carrying around at the feet of Jesus. Because I know that some of you listening, you've experienced divorce. You've experienced betrayal, abuse, abandonment, addiction, cheating, rejection, grief, and even trauma. And somewhere along the way, you started believing the lies of the enemy, that you were too broken, you were too messy, you were too much, you were too far gone, too unworthy to ever laugh, love, or trust again. The devil is a liar, but God. It reminds us that the thief only comes to kill, steal, and destroy. But I came that they may have life and have it more abundantly. See, the enemy wants to steal your peace, your joy, every single bit of your confidence, because that way he can take your identity away, steals your future and your ability to love again. Because Jesus came so you could live again, so that you could love again. Let me remind you something. God never called you to stay in abuse. God honors covenant. God never intended for his children to stay trapped in domestic abuse, emotional abuse, manipulation fear, toxic relationships, or destructive cycles. Because let me tell you something as a reminder: abuse is not biblical leadership and control, that is not love. Fear, that is not covenant. Scripture reminds us in 2 Timothy 1 through 7, for God gave us not a spirit of fear, but a power of love and of self-control. Psalms 82, 4, rescue the weak and the needy, deliver them from the hand of the wicked. See, I need to tell you today, there is a difference between hardship and abuse. There is a difference between conviction and control. And there is a huge difference between accountability and manipulation. See, let me remind you of this if you don't have this at the front of your brain. Forgiveness does not mean staying in danger. It does not mean tolerating violence. It does not mean accepting manipulation. It does not mean pretending that trauma never happened. Let me give you a little bit of my personal testimony if you haven't heard it. I've been married four times. It's not something I'm proud of. I did not know Jesus, but now I do. My first marriage was an escape, addiction. It became my outlet, and violence almost cost me my life in that marriage. That one relationship was so dark it nearly destroyed me completely at the age of 18. Second marriage. Well, it was addiction-abased, unhealthy attachments. There was cheating, adultery, and completely broken identity at every every facet. The third was verbal abuse, some physical abuse, adultery. It was completely full of betrayal. And the fourth one, well, I entered it and I was still, I was so unhealed. I was grieving. I was bleeding emotionally and searching for attention because I did not know how to sit with any of the pain that I experienced and carried with me over the years, and I sure didn't let know how to let God heal it because I had not let God in at this point. I had not had an encounter with him that would change my life forever. So let me tell you something in those repetitive cycles. I kept looking for people to heal wounds in me that only God could touch. Unequally yoked relationships, they cannot sustain what God did not build. Let me tell you something that a lot of people don't talk about. What these unequally yoked relationships look like versus kingdom relationships versus spiritual alignment versus God-centered marriages. Scripture clearly tells us in 2 Corinthians 6 14, do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. Being unequally yoked, it's deeper than not going to church together. It's about direction, it's about spiritual alignment, surrender, values, obedience, and purpose. Because I'm going to tell you something, attention is not covenant. And chemistry is not confirmation. Trauma bonds, they are not, I repeat, not God bonds. So when you start taking a look of being unhealed and hopping into another relationship, it's built from fear, loneliness, desperation, addiction, rebellion, grief, and needing validation. Any of this sounding familiar? It's okay. But God, when you do not know your worth, you settle for counterfeits all over the place pretending to be covenant. But I'm going to tell you something. You cannot build a kingdom covenant on flesh foundations. Ecclesiastes 4 12, a quarter three stands, can't broken easily. That third strand, that is God, not appearance, not religion, not social media Christianity. God truly at the hem. If God is not steering the relationship, I'm going to tell you what will happen. The flesh will eventually control everything. Every bit of unhealed wound will eventually come to the surface and start bleeding. And the instability will eventually show every foundation without God will crack every single time. Because if God is not steering the ship, the flesh will crash it. Again, you can't be unhealed and hop into something unhealed and think that what you refuse to confront is not going to come out on that person or their demons aren't going to come out. A covenant built by God, it produces peace, it produces safety, it produces accountability. It produces healing, honesty, and spiritual growth together. A family that prays together stays together. You know, I'd heard that phrase so many times over the years, and I never truly grasp and understand what it meant until I met God. And I craved that intimacy of reading the word together. I craved that intimacy of studying the Bible together, and I craved the intimacy of prayer together. See, when a covenant is not from God, it eventually will not last because every storm will reveal that the foundation is exposed. Because the pain exposes every unresolved wound, pride, selfishness, the lack of healing, and every identity fracture. So that's where the unyoked comes in. When you have one person that's a believer that is unhealed, and you have another person that is unhealed and not a believer, stuff starts repelling each other. And the more light that comes on one person, the more darkness is exposed in the other. It's a dangerous path, friends. Matthew 7, verses 24 through 27, the rain fell, the floods came, the winds blew and beat on the house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it. See, friends, when the firm foundation is not built on God, the storms come, blow away. But I may remind you of something. When you're walking through the divorce, you've walked through emotional trauma, you've walked through the separation of being with someone for a long time. I need to remind you that forgiveness is for you. It is not for them. Forgiveness is biblical. The Bible literally tells you that when you forgive, you are forgiven of your sins. Now we know that none of us is perfect. Not a single one of us on this earth is perfect, and we never will be. We are flesh. Bitterness roots. Man, we talked about that. Like you gotta get delivered from the bitterness because it will cause cycles to repeat in you. It will cause manifestations of sickness to grab a hold of you and it will keep you stuck because you're refusing to let go of that resentment. It life happens, okay? Life happens. We were unhealed. Um, we were unequally yoked. Whatever the case may be, the trauma, God can and will heal you. You have to surrender it, but you have to let go and forgive. The enemy wants to keep you in offense, wants to keep you in resentment and replay every single memory of pain, every bit of emotional imprisonment and keep you in constant anger. Why is that? Because the longer you stay stuck in your mind, the longer that you delay the unforgiveness, that you delay moving forward. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger be put away from you, according to Ephesians 4, 31 through 32. Matthew 6, 14. For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly father will also forgive you. Okay, let me remind you of something. Forgiveness, it does not excuse behavior, it does not erase memory, it does not remove wisdom, and it does not require reconciliation, but forgiveness releases you. It allows your heart to once again become soft, pliable, and clean in Jesus Christ. Forgiveness, it does not erase memory, but it removes every bit of the poison that is attached to it. You can forgive and still walk away, still have biblical boundaries to protect your peace. You can walk away, forgive, and still say no. Because for once in your life, you're choosing your healing. The enemy wants to keep the scenarios going playing on repeat in your head. Why is that? Because he doesn't want you to renew your mind. He wants to keep you overcoming these trauma loops with the spiritual warfare. He wants to keep you from having a Christian mindset. He wants to keep those intrusive thoughts battling through your mind daily. Trauma loops, what are they? They replay betrayal, they replay rejection, abandonment. They replay every evil and dark conversation. They replay and replay every bit of that pain because the enemy wants to keep you trapped in those mind cycles. Romans 12, 2 reminds us: be transformed by the renewing of the mind. 2 Corinthians 10 5, take every thought captive to obey Christ. Listen, there are days and times, many times actually throughout the day. Listen, let's be very transparent that I have to go, Satan, get behind me in the name of Jesus. When a thought comes into my mind, it doesn't align with peace, love, and the word of God. If it ain't holy, cast it out. It must go in the name of Jesus. So why are you listening to any of the lies of the enemy that come into your mind anymore? God is the only one that gets to define your identity. And your identity in him is a son or a daughter that is loved, called, and chosen to live a life of healing, love, and abundance. The enemy wants to continue to attack your identity, your self-worth, every bit of confidence that you have because he wants to delay your purpose. He wants to take away every bit of trust that you have to hold on to that pain and take away your emotional peace. The battlefield was never just your marriage. The battlefield was about your identity from the beginning. So I need to remind you today that your worth, it is not determined by who left you or what pain you went through. Your worth is your identity in Christ. It's learning to overcome this rejection, learning to heal after this heartbreak, finding yourself worth through God again. Fear not, I've redeemed you, I've called you by your name. You are mine, according to Isaiah 43:1. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted Psalms 34, 18. Rejection does not reduce your value, and divorce does not cancel your purpose. Betrayal does not erase your identity. Listen in marriage number four. I lost a child, and grief distorted my decisions. That loneliness in my mind made made attention feel like love and every bit of pain affected my discernment. It caused unhealed places to come up with me, and I started bleeding into everyone connected to me, everyone around me, because I held on to that pain, that unforgiveness, and to think that I was isolated. I played into everything about my identity, right? That was tied. Wasn't just about my marriage. It was about destroying that identity. And that's exactly what letting the devil and the enemy tell me who I was became. But God. Grace is why we get to get up again. Where sin increased, grace abounded all the more. Romans 5, 20. Lamentations 3, 22 through 23, his mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Grace is not permission to continue living recklessly. I'm going to tell you something. As I look back, I feel so blessed to be standing here in front of you. I feel so blessed to tell you that I would am human, that I had flesh and I had unhealed places. But I'm telling you today, you do not have to walk through this pain, condemnation, shame, and guilt that I carried around. I'm here to tell you today that God is your ultimate redeemer and he's ready, willing, and waiting. Because grace, it's about your redemption, the restoration through him, his mercy, and giving you another chance. The reason shame does not get to own you forever, because I'm going to tell you what, friends, family, it doesn't matter what you did yesterday. When you come with a repentive heart, God is ready, waiting. He's ready to redeem and restore every bit of your identity, everything that the enemy has stolen. This divorce, this betrayal, this abuse, this trauma, it does not have to define you. The cross was never about pretending that we never failed. It's about proving that failure, that failure does not have the final word over you because God knew that every failure, every wrong turn that we make, every rebellious moment and every single mistake that we would make, we can be forgiven because Jesus chose the cross. I'm going to tell you something. Grace is not an excuse to continue to sin. But grace, it's the reason that we get to rise again no matter what we've walked through. We get to learn to trust again. We get to have healthy relationships. We get to have emotional restoration and overcome every bit of fear because the enemy is a liar. And we get to heal from every attachment wound that we have. Ezekiel 36, verse 26. I will give you a new heart and a new spirit. Real love. Real love from Jesus. Real love from kingdom alignments and kingdom relationships. Honey, real love doesn't manipulate. It does not isolate. It does not destroy you and it does not abuse you. Healing teaches discernment. God restores what trauma has tried to steal from you. You are going to laugh again and trust again. You are going to live again. You are going to love again and you are going to feel peace again when you invite Jesus into every bit of the trauma, the unhealed pieces, and you lay it down. Because you do not have to stay in bondage from this divorce and everything that came along with it. Freedom in Christ, that is your portion. Your transformation is your portion when you surrender it to God. God will break every toxic cycle. Galatians 5 1 it is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Some people stay in survival mode because they choose never to heal, never to bring every bit of that darkness to the light. Quit hiding it. What are you holding on to it for? Aren't you ready to release that pain? You weren't meant to carry it, so today's the day you get to do that. God didn't create you to merely survive. He created you to live, to heal, to grow, to trust, to walk in peace, to walk in purpose, and to share your redemption story for others going through it to let them know that they're not alone. I want to know what bitterness are you carrying today? What memories have popped up through this broadcast that are still controlling you? What lies are you continuing to believe in? What are you afraid to surrender? Your next step into healing, your purpose, your transformation? That requires your yes. Freedom requires movement. Transformation requires your ability to surrender it, your accountability, community, and action. Some of you listening today are just now realizing that you're tired of the survival mode. You're tired of repeating these toxic cycles. You're tired of shrinking yourself. I know you're tired of living wounded and stuck in that fear, and you're tired of settling for less than God's best. And maybe, just maybe for the first time in your life, you're ready to fully surrender today to the roadmap into God's plan for your life. If this is you, it's time to rise up. I have a rise up mastermind for women ready to transition into God's plan, where you stop playing small, you break off the cycles, you heal emotionally, you gain clarity of direction, build confidence. This is not surface level, this is not mid-level motivation. This is actually identity, purpose, restoration. Ready to walk in kingdom strategy and spiritual growth. It's ready to break off everything because you can't fully walk into your future while you're remaining chained to the past. Grace in the Breaking has community and inner access. This is encouragement, growth, accountability, and healing. Walking through with those who walk through the same path. It's about faith-based growth, biblical principles, and accountability, where we have weekly live teachings and ongoing support. Whatever resource you need, check out Grace in the Breaking. Let's see what we can do to facilitate your growth and your next step. But I want to say a prayer over you today. Lord, I pray for every broken heart that is listening today. I pray that you bring healing, restoration, and most importantly, God, that you bring forgiveness over the hearts, the minds, and the soul. Let the bodies even experience healing in the mighty name of Jesus, because carrying this trauma, this pain was never their portion. Lord, open their eyes to see you and their ears to hear you. Give them a heart that is soft and pliable again for only you to work and mold. Let them step into everything that you have for them, Father, as they join you in this walk of healing. For every woman feeling lost or every man today, remind them, Father, that you still have a plan. Remind every person that's afraid to love that healing and love is possible with you again. For every listener trapped in survival mode, Lord, show them that there is purpose after their pain today, in the mighty name of Jesus. Joel 22-25 reminds us that I will restore to you the years that the swarming locusts have eaten. Friends, family, your story did not end in this divorce, in the betrayal, even in the abuse, the addiction, the grief, or the heartbreak. God still restores broken lives. There is healing and surrender, there is freedom in Christ, and there is purpose after pain. And your yes to God will change everything. Listen, if this episode spoke to you, I ask you to share it, subscribe, leave a review, join Grace in the Breaking community or inner access so you don't have to do life alone because your healing journey begins with your yes in Christ today. And as always, Grace meets you in the breaking. And purpose, your purpose is born there too. I love you. Until next time, friends. Thank you so much for spending this time with me today on Grace and the Breaking. If this episode spoke to your heart, please remember to follow, download, and share it with someone who might need a little encouragement right now. You can find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and all major podcast platforms. As I close, I want to leave you with this reminder. 2 Corinthians 12.9. My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness. So no matter what season you're walking through, you are not alone. And there is always Grace in the Breaking. For more information, resources, or to connect with me, visit GraceintheBreaking.com or email me at info at GraceIndheaking.com. Until next time, friends, stay rooted in faith, hold on to hope, and remember that there is grace in the breaking.