Not Everyone Is For You — Leveling Up, Closed Doors & Why God Shifts Your Circle"

Have you ever noticed that the moment you start to level up — the moment God begins to move in a new way in your life — things around you start to shift? Relationships that felt solid start to feel strange. Doors that were open suddenly close. People you expected to celebrate you pull back instead. And you're left wondering: what did I do wrong?

In this episode of Grace in the Breaking, Elizabeth Everett answers that question with honesty, scripture, and personal testimony: you didn't do anything wrong. You leveled up. And leveling up changes everything — by design.

Elizabeth breaks down why God removes people from your circle when He is elevating your season, why some people love the smaller version of you and will pull you back — intentionally or not — when you start to grow, and why you absolutely cannot go back and knock on the doors God has already closed. Every removal, every closed door, every uncomfortable shift is protection — for the gift inside you and the future God is building.

She also unpacks the difference between destiny helpers and distractions: God sends people who sharpen you and call out your gold, while the enemy sends people who look like blessings but quietly drain your focus, your faith, and your forward momentum. The question is not just who is in your circle — it's whether you have the discernment and the courage to choose wisely.

If you are in a season of transition, if relationships are shifting and you don't fully understand why, if you feel the tension of outgrowing a space but aren't sure what comes next — this episode is your word for today. It's time to trust the shift. It's time to rise.

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IN THIS EPISODE

• Why God shifts your circle when He is moving you into a new season — and why it is not rejection, it is redirection
• The difference between people who celebrate your growth and people who are more comfortable with your limitations
• What the pull back to your old self actually looks like — guilt trips, subtle sabotage, and internal guilt — and how to recognize it
• Why you cannot keep knocking on the doors God has already closed — and the specific reasons He closes them
• How every removal, every pruning, and every closed door is protection for what God placed inside you
• The one question God is asking every person in transition: will you obey?
• How to tell the difference between a destiny helper and a distraction — and why the enemy won't make it obvious
• Why 'wanna be a star, hang out with stars' is not about pride — it's about atmosphere and alignment
• An introduction to the Rise Up Mastermind — the room built for people who are ready to level up together

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KEY TAKEAWAYS

• The removal is not rejection — it's redirection. 
• When God removes someone from your close circle during a season of growth, He is making room for what your next level requires.
• Not everyone can hold your calling. 
• Some people love you but love the smaller version of you. Their ceiling was never meant to be your ceiling.
• Stop knocking on closed doors. 
• God closes doors for reasons — jealousy, stagnation, protection, or because He heard what you didn't. Trust the closed door as much as you trust the open one.
• Every move God makes is for your protection. 
• Not some of them. All of them. He is guarding the gift, the calling, and the future He spoke over you.
• God sends destiny helpers. The enemy sends distractions. 
• Both show up looking like exactly what you need. Pray over your circle the same way you pray over your calling.
• Your atmosphere determines what can grow in you. 
• Wanna be a star? Hang out with stars. Environment is the soil your next season grows in.

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🔥READY FOR MORE? JOIN THE RISE UP MASTERMIND

If this episode lit something up in you — if you are done shrinking, done conforming, done letting the wrong circle be your ceiling — the Rise Up Mastermind is your next step. This is a community of people who are leveling up together, choosing destiny helpers over distractions, and running toward everything God placed inside them. We challenge each other, push each other, and genuinely want to see each other win.

It's time to rise. The door is open.

👉  www.graceinthebreaking.com

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📚COMING SOON: HEALING AFTER DIVORCE MASTERCLASS

A deeply transformational, Spirit-led masterclass designed to walk you and your family through every layer of healing after the end of a marriage — grief, restoration, co-parenting, identity, purpose, and community. Stay connected so you don't miss the launch.

👉  Get on the waitlist at www.graceinthebreaking.com

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If this episode spoke to you, share it with someone who is in a season of transition right now. Leave a rating and review — it helps Grace in the Breaking reach the people who need to hear this. Every single review matters.

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Grace in the Breaking — with Elizabeth Everett  |  Trust the shift. It's all working for you.

Contact Elizabeth Everett:                                                                                               Website: graceinthebreaking.com                                                                          Email: info@graceinthebreaking.com                                                                        Instagram: @graceinthebreaking                                                                                YouTube: @GraceintheBreaking 

Resources & Links:

• Nashville Anti-Human Trafficking Coalition (NAHT)
• Educate to Recognize Program
• The Life Recovery Bible
• King James Version Bible
• Additional Resources for Parents and Educators

Connect with the Coalition:

• NAHT Facebook
• NAHT Instagram

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:13

Welcome, welcome, welcome. I'm Elizabeth Everett, and this is Grace in the Breaking. What do you do when God shifts your circle? When you're leveling up and he's closing doors and he sends new people for the next season. This is the space where we're going to tell the truth today because we trust God with the truth and we keep it moving around here. Listen, I am so glad that you chose to spend your time with me today, but I'm going to jump right into this topic, and I believe this one's going to be something that unlocks something for someone, maybe a lot of someone's, because I know what we're talking about today is something that I've been walking through with God, and I know that I'm not alone in it. So here's the question I want you to sit with today. Have you ever noticed that when you start to grow, when you start to level up, and even when you start to walk in your calling, that your purpose has shifted, that things around you start to move. They start to shift. It's like there's a small earthquake. Relationships that once felt solid, they begin to feel strange. And doors that used to open suddenly now are slammed shut. And maybe you're confused by that, and maybe you've been hurt by it, and maybe you've been trying to figure out what you did wrong. But I'm here to tell you, I'm here to remind you, you didn't do anything wrong. You leveled up. And leveling up, it changes everything around you by design. Listen, when God started shifting my seasons, he started pruning away every one that was not meant to go with me to the next season. He saw conversations that I wasn't privy to. He knew that if I stayed in some relationships, that I would shrink and stay comfortable, that I would never step outside that comfort zone and start to move in his will. He knew that I would, for lack of better words, stay stuck. Does that sound like you? Let's talk about this. When God is moving us in a new season, a new level, a new assignment, a new dimension of who he created us to be, he doesn't just upgrade your circumstances. Honey, he upgrades your circle. That's why there's removal. And sometimes that upgrade looks like addition. God, God'll send new people, new connections, and new community that is aligned with where He's taken you, that will push you to greatness. Because sometimes, and this is the part nobody likes to talk about, the upgrade, it looks like subtraction. God begins to remove people in your close proximity who are not equipped for, aligned with, or even supportive of your next season. It's not because they're bad people, not always because the relationship is toxic, but because they were assigned to a version of you that is no longer the current version. John 15 verses one through two reminds us I am the vine, and my father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit, he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. Honey, I've been there the pruning hurts, but let me tell you, there is glory on the other side. Pruning, it's a gardening term that we have to learn how to make personal. The gardener, he removes what is not serving the growth of the vine, not to punish the vine, but to position it for greater fruitfulness. So when God prunes your relationship, he's not telling you that you did something wrong. He's telling you that something greater is coming and he's telling you that he is preparing the space for it. Now this is important. Do not mistake removal for rejection. The removal is redirection. Remember, God sees things we don't. He wants us to move and he knows that comfortable people keep us safe. We have to be pushed outside of our comfort zone when we're stepping from pain to purpose. Listen, it hurts when someone who used to be so close starts to feel so far, or when a relationship that felt like family starts to feel forced. Or even when you realize the connection has shifted and you didn't choose for it to. We have a name for that. But God he doesn't expect you to celebrate every pruning, but he does expect you to trust it. Don't try to open doors once he's closed them, baby. Don't take two steps back when he's pulling you forward. If God cut off a relationship, there is a reason for it. You may not understand it today or tomorrow, but someday it will make sense. Don't try to undo what God has done when he closes a door. Do not force it open. Walk forward. Move. Because I'm gonna tell you something. Not everyone is for you. They want the smaller version when it's time to level up. They're gonna hold you back. Now I need to say something that might sting just a little, but I say it with love because I've honestly lived it. When everyone is not for you, some people in your life that like you, they don't like the new version. They like the old version that fits neatly in their circle. The version that doesn't make them feel challenged, the version that doesn't make them have to look at themselves, the version that stays just small enough that there's an uncomfortable distance between who you are and who they are. And when you start to grow, God starts to do something real and new and elevated in your life. And some of those people they don't celebrate it. They actually talk against it. They feel it. And what they feel when you're leveling up is threatening. So what do they do? They pull. Sometimes it's intentionally and sometimes it's not. They make comments designed to bring you back down, to pull the life out of you and knock the breath out. They remind you of who you used to be because it's easier for them to stay in that mindset. They question every decision you make and they plant seeds of doubt about the direction God is taking you. They create drama that pulls your attention back into the world and away from what God is building in yours. Does that sound familiar? Listen, we've all been there, we've experienced all of this to some degree, but God. And sometimes all of their actions, it's unintentional. They're not malicious, they're just comfortable with the old you. They don't know how to relate to the new version. They don't know how to support you because it's something that they yet don't understand. And it's their discomfort comes out of resistance even when they would never in a million years mean to hold you back. Either way, honey, the effect is the same. The pull is the pull. And if you recognize it for what it is, you'll be able to move through it. I want to talk to you about what the pull actually looks like in real life, because it's not always obvious. Sometimes the pull, it looks like a guilt trip. You've changed. You just think you're better than everyone else. And because you love them, because you have history with them, and because you don't want to hurt them, you shrink back. You start piece by piece shrinking back into that corner of the version of that little girl or little boy that God is pulling you out of. You dim your light just a little every time and you stop talking about your dreams around certain people. You go quiet about what God is doing because you've learned that when you share your excitement, it creates distance. Sometimes that pool looks like sabotage, subtle, almost invisible, but real. Plans that fall through at the last minute, discouraging words disguised as concern. Are you sure about that? That sure does seem risky. What if it doesn't work out? And again, sometimes this is from a place of genuine fear for you, but the effect is still the same. It seeds doubt where God has planted faith. And sometimes that pull is internal. You know that feeling, that pulling inside of you. You look around at your old circle and you feel guilty for growing. You feel guilty for outgrowing that space because you no more just see it, you start to feel it. And you wonder if you're being arrogant. You wonder if you're abandoning people. You feel the tension between who you were and who you are becoming, and that tension is uncomfortable. Then you start to wonder if it's just easier to stay put. The devil is a liar. Anytime those thoughts come up into your head, you need to capture them, not be passive, capture them and cast them out in the name of Jesus. So I need you to hear me loud and clear. That tension, that tension is not a sign that you're going the wrong way. That tension is a feeling of the seed breaking open. Because, honey, it has to break before it can grow. Stay in the tension. Let's do the work. Man, God is doing something big in me and he's doing something big in you too. Listen, when I first told my family about starting my ministry, all I heard was, oh my gosh, you're quitting your job. That just makes no sense. How are you gonna make it? How, how, how? I didn't have all the answers. I just knew what God had told me, and I knew what God had brought me through. It's unimaginable. I didn't make it through anything that I've gone through in my own strength. All I can say is buck God. And if he was so good to get me through, then why wouldn't I trust him? Why wouldn't I obey when he's telling me to step forward and move in this? I mean, what do I have to lose? If God is with me, then who can be against me? Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of the mind according to Romans twelve two. Honey, conformity is subtle. It rarely announces itself and it disguises itself as loyalty, as belonging as love. But the question God is asking you is will you stay conformed to a circle that cannot handle your calling? Or will you trust me enough to be transformed into someone that circle was never meant to contain? You are made for more. You've always known that and deep down so do the people who are pulling on you. That is partly why they pull. Listen, the enemy will send people as distractions to place doubt to pull you back. You gotta be stronger. Greater is he that is in me than he that is in this world. Recognize and keep moving. I just can't hit this fact enough that you got to stop knocking on the doors that God already closed. Because there are so many people that you get stuck here, not because you don't know that the door is closed, but because you keep going back to knock on it anyways, because you start to miss these people. You start to get stuck in the thoughts and replay the words that they've said, but I may remind you if God closes a door and we say we trust him, and then at two in the morning we are standing in the front of that door again knocking and reaching for the handle, wondering if maybe this time it will open, wondering if we've made a mistake or wondering if we should have stayed. I need you to hear me loud and clear. I want you to repeat after me, and I want to say this as clearly and as lovingly as I know how. Here's the thing about a closed door. Sometimes it's because of jealousy. There is someone on the other side of that door who cannot genuinely celebrate your rise, who needs you beneath them in order to feel okay about themselves. And if you stay in that room, their ceiling will become your ceiling. When their ceiling isn't meant to be your floor. Sometimes the door is closed because if you stay, you won't move. There are environments, relationships, jobs, circles, and even churches that are comfortable enough that you would never leave on your own. God has to close the door physically because your comfort, your comfort would have kept you there and kept you from your calling. Resonating? Sometimes that closed door is because God heard what you did not. Remember, he hears every conversation when we aren't in the room. He saw the intentions that were never spoken out loud. He knows the full picture. He sees it, and he knows what that environment would cost you, what it would cost me. But he loves us too much to let us stay. So he closed it to protect us from what we couldn't see. So let me remind you that rejection was for your protection. It was a redirection into safety. And sometimes the door is just closed for pure protection, protection of the gift inside of you, protection for the calling on your life. Protection of what God has spoken over you that the enemy would love nothing more than to get his hands on and tear it apart. Because he'll hold on through every open door that you're too loyal to close yourself. What he opens no man can shut, and what he shuts no man can open, according to Revelation 3 7. So do you understand the weight of what I'm saying? When God shuts a door, no man can open it. Not you, not your persistence, not your charm, and not your history with the person on the other side. If he closed it, it is closed. And the most faithful thing you can do is stop wasting your energy knocking and start walking toward what he is open. I'm gonna tell you it made no sense when God closed the door on my marriage. And when I look back, I see why he did it. Because God knew that I was comfortable. I was comfortable in being a wife. I was comfortable stuck in corporate. I was comfortable. I wasn't moving forward, but God had a purpose for me. He kept pulling me nudges, but he knew that the environment that I was in wasn't because there wasn't a symmetry of love, but because there was a calling for hire. He had to remove so that I would move forward. And I kept trying to knock on that door with all my might. I prayed, I fasted, didn't move. And that's when I realized that God had closed that door. Regardless of what anybody else had tried to speak into me, God heard conversations I didn't. God knew I would continue to play small. God knew, period. So I want to sit with you in this for a moment. Because this changed everything for me when I finally let it settle in my spirit. Every move that God makes, every removal, every pruning, and every closed door, every shifted relationship and uncomfortable transition is for your protection and mine. Not some of them, but all of them. He is protecting the gift that he placed inside you. He is protecting the assignment written on your life before you were born, and he is protecting the future decisions your present self would make without the full information. He's protecting your peace, your purpose, and your next season from anyone and places and patterns that would drain what he has begun depositing inside of you. For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future, according to Jeremiah 29, 11. He knows the plans. He is not surprised by the transition that you are in. He is not scrambling to adjust. He literally sees the beginning from the end. When he closes the doors you didn't see coming, trust the protection. When the season ends and you did not get a vote, trust the protection. The question God is asking you is I is this will you obey? Will you trust him long enough to let go of what he is removing? Will you trust him long enough to stop reaching back for what he has closed? And will you trust him long enough to believe that what he is building in you is worth the discomfort of this transition? Will you obey? Where I had to stop fighting God's removal and surrender to it was literally in the middle of that divorce, where it didn't make any sense, and I was just laying there, literally just laying crying out. And then a peace came over me the day of the divorce. And when it was final, I was like, okay, God, well, what now? And he said, Now I can begin. It hadn't been an easy process. Still been some pruning and it's been a lot of healing, but I can tell you what, God orchestrated every moment, and I'm so proud of where he has brought me from and where I am going. And this is going to be your story too. I want to give you the framework that has been foundamental in how I think about the people God has placed in my life and why. God, God sends destiny helpers, and the enemy sends distractions. Both will show up looking like blessings, but they will have something different. To offer. Both will feel significant in the moment. So how do you tell the difference? A destiny helper calls out the gold in you. They see what God put inside of you. And sometimes it's before you can actually see it in yourself. They call it out, they speak it, and they invest in it. They challenge you not to break you down, but to build you up. They hold you accountable because they actually need you to succeed. They celebrate your wins without competition and they sit with you in your setbacks without judgment. And when you leave time with a destiny helper, you are sharper, you are more inspired, and you are anchored. You are activated because you are who God says you are. A distraction, man, they look different. A distraction needs something from you and it always drains you. It will consume your time, your energy, your focus, and your faith. It creates an urgency around things that don't matter in relation to your real assignment so that it sits untouched. They might be fun, they are loud, and they are appealing, but they are so costly. Because every hour you spend in the orbit of a distraction is an hour you're not building what God told you to build. Whoo! I feel the Holy Spirit up in here. So I want to be honest with you, because I've been on both sides of this. I've been someone's distraction. There was a season in my life where I was not operating from a healthy place, and the people around me, they paid a cost. That is humbling for me to admit. But it's also important because it reminds me that this is not labeling people as good or bad. It's about discernment, it's about alignment. It's about asking God, not your emotions, not your nostalgia, not your loyalty, but God. Who have you sent and who is the detour? Because he will reveal it. Because I want you to know the enemy, he's going to send someone who looks just like you and me, doesn't look like a distraction. He's going to send someone who looks like exactly what you've prayed for, exactly what you needed. Someone that's charming, caring, someone that shows up just at the right moment. Whose presence over time, honey, it costs you your focus, your faith, and your forward momentum. That is why you need discernment. That is why you need to pray for that daily. And this is why you need to pray over your circle the same way you pray over your calling because you are connected to them. Iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another, according to Proverbs 27, 17. What does that mean? Here's what people forget about that image. Iron being sharpened against the wrong surface doesn't get it sharper, it actually damages it. The friction has to be with the right material, the right direction for it to move in the right direction. The same is true for your relationships. Not all friction is sharpening, not all closeness is building. You need discernment to know the difference and the courage to act on what discernment is telling you. Listen, you don't have time to waste anymore. And this is why I'm going to be so direct with you. If you want to go where God is taking you, you cannot afford to fill your inner circle with people who are not trying to get there to. See, that is exactly why I created the Rise Up Mastermind, a room full of people who are leveling up, who are hungry and are done playing small. I'm gonna tell you more at the end of this episode, but because I want you to hear what it is and why I created it. It's created for you walking, knowing there's something more, how to create the framework, how to move and how to break off all the things that are causing you to play small because you deserve more. Your calling is higher, and it's your job to grab it and walk in it. I want you to take a look at your inner circle, the people that you are most consistently around, and the voices that you let closest to your decisions, your dreams, and your daily life. And I want to ask you honestly, are those people destiny helpers or are they distractions? Are they calling you higher or are they pulling you back? Do they actually celebrate who you are becoming or are they more comfortable with who you used to be? Are they iron or are they just familiar? Then I want you to take these answers to God, not with a list of people to cut off, but with open hands and say, Lord, please show me who you have sent and who the enemy sent. Show me who is for my next season and who is for the version of me that I am leaving behind because I need your discernment. I trust you to shift what needs to shift, Father. Close those doors and I will obey. That is it. That is the prayer. And then you trust what he does, you don't go back knocking. Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans according to Proverbs 16 3. Why wouldn't you commit your circle to him? He will establish who belongs to you. He knows what he placed inside of you better than you do, and he is deeply committing to protecting it all the way to its fullness. So I want to tell you, friends, you are not shrinking back. You are not going back to a space that was never meant to hold what God put inside of you. Baby, you are leveling up, and that comes with a new circle, new doors, a new season, and new assignments. Trust the renewal, trust the removal, trust the closed doors and embrace the shift. Choose your circle on purpose, with discernment and with God's voice being louder than anyone else's. And speaking of that circle right now, I have two things I need to put in your hand before you go today. First, if you're walking through the end of a marriage and you need a structure, spirit-led path for healing for yourself and your family, I have a master class launching soon, healing after divorce, a journey for you and your family. It's coming very soon around the first of August, and we're gonna go deep into every layer of recovery and restoration. So stay connected and don't miss that launch. And second, I am so excited about this one. The Rise Up Mastermind, it's here, it's waiting, and there's limited spaces available. So I want to tell you something. If this message did something in you today, if you're done shrinking, you're done conforming, and you're done letting the wrong circle be your ceiling. Rise Up Mastermind is your next step. This is for the woman, this is for the man, the person who knows that there is more inside of them, and now you are ready. Whew, this is not a passive program. It is a roadmap. It is a community of leveling up together, choosing destiny helpers over distractions. It is people building real and choosing not to let anyone talk them out of what God has spoken over your life. It's time to rise today, not eventually, now. The circle is changing and the season is shifting, and there is a room full of people on the other side of this ready to sharpen you, push you, and celebrate you, and help you run towards everything that God has placed inside of you. Go to graceinthebreaking.com, check up the rise up, get in the room, because I love you, God loves you more. Till next time, trust the shift and choose your circle wisely. But most importantly, rise. I love you. Thank you so much for spending this time with me today on Grace and the Breaking. If this episode spoke to your heart, please remember to follow, download, and share it with someone who might need a little encouragement right now. You can find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and all major podcast platforms. As I close, I want to leave you with this reminder. 2 Corinthians 12.9. My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness. So no matter what season you're walking through, you are not alone. And there is always Grace in the Breaking. For more information, resources, or to connect with me, visit GraceInTheBreaking.com or email me at info at GraceInTheBreaking.com. Until next time, friends, stay rooted in faith, hold on to hope, and remember that there's grace in breaking.