Talking About Bladder Troubles, Traveling With Kids, And Airport Jail

You know that split second before a sneeze when you think, “Please not today”? We start there and somehow end up at TSA, breast milk testing, and the emotional math of whether you really will “miss this.” That’s Momish energy: honest, a little unhinged, and weirdly comforting.

We talk postpartum recovery with zero filter, including the pelvic floor realities nobody brags about, nap battles that turn you into a human mattress, and the sleep setup changes that actually help (yes, we are preaching blackout curtains). Then we go straight for the sacred cow of parenting advice: the “you’re gonna miss this” line. We love our kids deeply, and we still have a running list of things we will not miss, from sick-season germs to public meltdowns to the endless diaper spend.

If you’ve ever traveled with a baby, this one is for you. We share beach trip planning tips, flying-with-kids strategy, and a breast milk moment at the airport that nearly sent us into full meltdown. From there, we get real about breastfeeding, pumping at work, lactation consultant confusion, and the relief that comes with letting go of pressure. Fed is best, mental health matters, and sometimes taking your meds and making the switch you need is the most loving move.

We also get into postpartum identity, “getting your pink back,” and how mom friendships become an actual survival tool. If any of this hits home, subscribe, share this with a mom friend who needs the laugh, and leave a review. What part of motherhood are you in right now, and what are you ready to stop pretending is “magical”?

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:21

Alright,

Sneezing And Bladder Reality

SPEAKER_01 0:22

welcome to Momish, our weekly yap session where I've been accidentally peeing myself all week.

SPEAKER_02 0:27

What we can all relate. We can all relate. Yeah. Am I the only one that at work I have to like if I know I have to sneeze? I have to like take a pause, keekle, and be like, sneeze, and then keep going.

SPEAKER_04 0:40

No, but I'm gonna start. I had just bladder training myself and going to pee before I like really have to pee, because otherwise it's it's bad.

SPEAKER_01 0:48

So we can all really I think I'm tickling myself.

SPEAKER_04 0:52

So other moms out there, is this something that's just an us thing, or is this a also does it get better? I don't know. My kid's four. Well, I guess I had a seven. No, you have two. Well, I know, but like I know it never got better. So before I had my yeah, yeah, mine just got worse. Yeah, and then worse. Yeah. Love that. So you guys are in my dream. All things I look forward to.

The Pregnancy Dream Spiral

SPEAKER_04 1:14

Tell us about your tell us about your dream of God.

SPEAKER_02 1:17

I don't want to speak it into existence, but I'm so curious. In my dream, all three of us were pregnant again. Gross, but we were due a cup.

SPEAKER_03 1:27

We were due within a day of each other. So Gabby went first, but Gabby in my dream, you were like giving birth in like this fancy like birthing center. Cause she was like, This time I really don't want an epidural.

SPEAKER_02 1:39

Hell yeah. That's exactly right. So Katie and I were there, like when you gave birth. You said baby. Again, we're gonna have it. We were your do-lows in my dream. And then Katie, the next day you gave birth, but then by the time I did, you guys were already busy, so nobody came to mind. That's sad.

SPEAKER_04 1:58

Well, that's not a reality, and I would never do that to you.

SPEAKER_01 2:01

I would like if you like maybe my third baby, like I'd be like, can you guys be there for support?

SPEAKER_04 2:07

I could be like, Gil, you just stay home for this one. If it was like we got this from here. So I meant like if we all had third babies when I would be like, we'd all be like, you can just stay home and we'll but yes, yeah, Adam can stay home. That's fine. We know how to do it. Yeah, so no, he would never, he would be dead.

SPEAKER_01 2:25

But like I think that would be hilarious. Yeah, not hilarious, but like that would be nice.

SPEAKER_03 2:28

But I was like mid-stream, and Dylan wakes me up and he's like, Hey, I gotta go run an errand. And I'm like, wake up out of my dream, and I'm like, oh, I just gave her. I'm like, I just gave you trying to run an air.

SPEAKER_04 2:41

Yeah, like what is happening? Yeah, but let's keep that in in my dreams right now.

SPEAKER_03 2:46

Yeah, so use protection is the moral of that story.

SPEAKER_01 2:49

But last night, Dylan's like, oh Gabby, you have an announcement to make you're pregnant. I was like, who said that? Was that Dylan?

SPEAKER_04 2:55

I am not no I know you were like, oh, vodka soda, and he's like, You're pregnant? Like, there was literally the word vodka in that sentence. Like, where did where did you get that she was pregnant?

SPEAKER_01 3:04

And I'm like sitting in between Ryan and Adam, and Ryan is never gonna listen to this, but the most like shy, cool guy. Hey Ryan, shout out. And I was like, This is very like awkward.

SPEAKER_02 3:17

You're like, Ryan, I am not please don't think any of this.

SPEAKER_01 3:21

Yes, and drinking.

SPEAKER_02 3:23

That's okay.

Mom Confessions And Nap Battles

SPEAKER_01 3:24

Uh yeah, so you want to talk about um confessions of the week?

SPEAKER_04 3:31

You want to talk about further? Okay, yeah, we can talk about mom confessions of the week. Mine's pretty bad. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 3:38

This is a safe space, right? This is always soft, safe, soft space. So I was just drinking an alcoholic beverage, so to speak. And Charlie took two sips of was it at least like what was it? It was a turf side, so it's like it's odd. It's only four percent. Four and a half, yeah. She only got like 0.06. It was the lemonade, and she looks at me and she's like, Oh, and I was like, No, no, we hate that.

SPEAKER_04 4:03

Noah uh hit my vape when she was a baby. So which time? And so did crew now. So crew is now all about my vape, and he's just like every time he sees it, I'm just like just grabs it, and I'm like, oh my god, what am I gonna do? So I guess that's I mean, it's not a mom confession of the week because that happened before.

SPEAKER_01 4:22

No, I'm I don't know if it's a confession or not, but I've had really hard time with nap time. Not even, I guess it is nap time because he's rubbing his eyes and he's ready to go to sleep. Oh yeah, but he will not sleep in the crib, and like he'll start on me and he'll fall asleep, and then I put him in the crib and he wakes up, and then we have to restart the cycle. I did it three times and I was like, I'm nap-trapped. I need a minute for myself. I can't just I can't I want to hold you for the rest of your life, but it's unrealistic.

SPEAKER_04 4:51

It's unrealistic. I need to go pee in your shit. Yeah, or also just like God forbid, I washed my hair today. Yeah. I mean, crew went through a little phase of that, and eventually, like we just had to be like, all right, you can just cry for 15 minutes. It's fine, you're safe in your crib. Yeah. Oh, well, all kids are different, so whatever what works for mine may not work for yours. I don't know. I don't have any good advice. I don't know. Just gonna stay awake till just let him like run around the house like 900 times, and then maybe he'll just hire them and try again. Yeah, yeah, we sleep trained for a little bit with Charlie.

SPEAKER_03 5:24

Isla, we didn't really have to, so we got lucky there. But I mean, you guys saw before we started the pod, I was trying to put Isla for a nap, and I mean she cried for a hot minute, but yeah, when she's in here rubbing her eyes, she's fed, she changed all the things. Your needs have been met in your tire. Yes, I know it's time for your nap. So just fuck to sleep.

SPEAKER_01 5:43

I put him down to it, and then he's standing and like mom, mom, you're so cute.

SPEAKER_04 5:50

Do you keep the like it dark in there? Do you have like a blackout curtain?

SPEAKER_01 5:54

No, but it's it's like pretty dark for the most part. Like his little music and sound is on. Like you're gonna need that black out curtain.

SPEAKER_04 6:01

Yeah, you're gonna need a blackout curtain. You need pitch ass black in there. That's gonna be my piece of advice.

SPEAKER_01 6:06

Like he's in there sleeping so peacefully, and then he's like, uh, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_04 6:13

You need the blackout curtain. Yeah. Because they cannot, if there's any hint that it is daylight out outside, like even if there's like a crack, like a piece of sunlight peeking through that blackout curtain. I have mine like duct taped to my window. Yeah, and it if it gets any light, they're like, I can see that, and they wake up. Like, honestly, word from word from the wise, get that fucking blackout curtain. But also just give them like five.

SPEAKER_01 6:38

Yeah, give them five or five, but give them twenty.

SPEAKER_04 6:41

I mean, API. My max is usually 15, just because I'm not a complete evil person, I can't listen my child cry. It gives me so much anxiety when I hear him cry, and Gil will have to be like, do not go in next. Yeah. And so it's it takes a while. And so I get it. Because from as a mom of two now, I like I even with my second child, it's a little, it's hard. So with with being a newer mom, yeah, like it it's it's gonna have to and then you feel guilty because you're like, well, you know, they say, what is it?

SPEAKER_01 7:15

The years are the days are long, the years are short. And I'm like, I'm gonna miss this moment, but I also just will you though miss that exact moment? I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 7:24

That's you might that's something

The Things We Will Not Miss

SPEAKER_04 7:26

I wanted to bring up. I don't kind of going off. There was this thing I saw that it was like the you're gonna miss this.

SPEAKER_02 7:35

Whoever sings that, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 7:37

Whoever country artists, you're gonna walk. Yeah, no the fuck I'm not. And so just a list of things that I will not miss as a mom. Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_01 7:48

Screaming at the restaurant today. Oh, that's a new one. I'm like, you're gonna be that kid, aren't you?

SPEAKER_04 7:53

Yeah, yeah. The the snot? I will not miss the snot. The coughing in my face. In my face, over and over again. Won't miss that.

SPEAKER_01 8:04

Oh, pulling my hair. I thought about shaving my head the other day.

SPEAKER_04 8:07

Yes, yes. The um how many times I've said this is why moms cut their hair short. Got it.

SPEAKER_01 8:12

I get it now.

SPEAKER_04 8:12

Yes, the pulling of the hair. What's another one? They'll just well, my kids are really decent sleepers, so I won't say lack of sleep in the beginning. You know, you maybe it wakes up in and nobody sleeps.

SPEAKER_01 8:23

5 a.m. is a little much sometimes. My kids are. I wake up early today. That can't remind me.

SPEAKER_03 8:30

On that, I found this quote. Hold on, let me find it. And it it's kind of sad. No stage of motherhood is forever, and that's both a relief and a heartbreak. Yeah, it is. That's what I think of. And that's exactly what I think of because I'm like, let me take this. Like, this isn't gonna last forever if it's one of those stages where it's harder. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:49

I know it's kind of sad because I think a lot about like our parents and like our mother or in-laws too. I'm like, wow, she like loves being a grandma, and I know how much she misses being a mom. Yeah, like being a mom to babies. I mean, now she's she's still a mom, but it's different now, and it's a different stage. Yeah, I know she misses. And that's the thing.

SPEAKER_03 9:10

Even the harder parts, the drool, the like no sleep. It comes to an end, and then you're kind of like, oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 9:16

And then we I don't know. I think that's just like our m our brains pr playing tricks on us, like with just being mothers. You're like, oh, I'm gonna, you know, it's like when you forget all about how terrible being pregnant is, and you're like, I'm gonna do this again. I actually loved it. And 50-50. It wasn't that it wasn't bad. I mean, okay, well, I had a not so lovely. I mean, my second time around was like not so bad, but the first time I was like zero out of ten never doing this again. And then I had another baby and it wasn't so bad.

SPEAKER_01 9:48

But it helped that we were all Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 9:52

I definitely didn't love having to go to the emergency room three times, but anyway. I didn't love that for you either. No, I was like, in the hospital, it was a lot of people. I know Gabby's a real one. She messaged me and was like, Why are you in the emergency room?

SPEAKER_01 10:08

Like Katie just thought I was like a psychologist.

SPEAKER_04 10:10

I said, Bitch, you clairvoyant. She's like, No, you're looking around. You're I said, Is Gabby here?

SPEAKER_01 10:15

But are you? She just had my location. I use that app like it's like a social media. I like to see like she likes to know where I'm not a talker.

SPEAKER_04 10:21

I'm just curious. Don't ever lie to Gabby. I'm my friend. Because she'll fucking find you find me. Instead of asking you if you guys are at work, I'm like, let me just see. I don't have your location. No, you definitely do. We just look at this. No, it doesn't when I look up, like if I look up Gabby's name on t on text, it says that she's in Andrew. You know how to find friends.

SPEAKER_02 10:40

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I go oh go to the app. Yeah, you gotta look at the app. See?

SPEAKER_04 10:44

I like that I can just go see. Like I can look at Gil, it says he's in Fuquin, and then I just go here and it pops up.

SPEAKER_01 10:51

But if I go to you Sometimes that doesn't work it doesn't have that to go to the app because it has and it'll say like your location, it doesn't have your exact I'm a certified.

SPEAKER_04 11:02

I will know.

SPEAKER_01 11:03

When my ex was certified, was trying to say certified in infinite. Well, I will just know if someone's fucking me over. Like I found Did you guys see that Justin Bieber was at Coachella? I thought he was supposed was he not supposed to be big?

SPEAKER_03 11:17

No, he was, but it was last night, and he sang like all his old songs from like way, way, way, way, way back in the day.

SPEAKER_04 11:24

What that sounds like what was the album that he put out that was like the like the redemption album after he like lost his shit? That is such a good album. No, he Gil and I like used to bump that shit in the car a lot. I noted. I will listen to that. That's a good album and see if he's like, what the fuck is this? Okay, y'all's really cut me off when I was talking about my you're gonna miss this shit. Great. We talk on at the end to that. So anyway, you're gonna miss this. So you're gonna miss this. No, I ain't so yeah. Should I just like go go backwards and do it again? Okay. So the drool, the snot, the coughing in your face. Noah, like literally just was like, she'll just do it in the middle of the night. She's just like coughing in my face. Won't miss that. I will miss this age, and I'll miss Cruz age, but I will not miss the whole things that like they're sick all the time.

SPEAKER_01 12:21

Oh, I have a good one for both of you. The hand foot mouth. Oh my god. We won't miss that.

SPEAKER_04 12:27

Yo, that was the most choked Dylan out. That almost took me out. And I was right. I had to sleep in a mask and gloves because Noah was covered from head to toe. Dylan looked like he had leprosy. Yeah. I washed his toenails like four months after the fact.

SPEAKER_01 12:42

That was drinking honey.

SPEAKER_04 12:45

Yeah. I've never had seen an adult get so bad. It was so much.

SPEAKER_01 12:49

I heard it's worse for adults, too.

SPEAKER_04 12:51

Yeah, it's worse for adults, but like I didn't even get it. That's the thing is Noah. When I took her to terrogen care, they were like, this is probably one of the worst cases we've ever seen. She was miserable. And the thing is, Charlie, what, like, didn't get it that bad.

SPEAKER_03 13:03

No, she had a high fever. She had like a couple spots on like a diaper rash.

SPEAKER_04 13:08

It wasn't even like Yeah, Noah was covered everywhere. Like that poor kid. I just feel so guilty for that. But I was like, I was pregnant with crew, and I was like, I'm not getting this shit. So I stopped in gloves, a mask. I was like, nope, not doing that. Yeah. I can't handle it. I was like, Dylan, you gotta sleep in the guest room. I don't want to look at that shit. Yeah, that was wild. Yeah, so won't miss that one. Also, won't miss the meltdowns over like the most basic thing. Like, I would just like ask her to do one thing and she flips out. And it's usually like when she's tired, blah blah blah. But yeah. I have two in diapers right now, so I'd like to say I won't miss diapers.

SPEAKER_03 13:51

Ultimately, I try to take every stage with a grain of salt.

SPEAKER_04 13:54

I mean, there's yeah, the challenges and stuff buying diapers. I just miss I'm I mind the cost of diapers. The cost I was gonna say, I got two in diapers. That shit is expensive. I am constantly buying diapers here. Yeah, that's wild. I'm the same size.

SPEAKER_01 14:08

You need to at least that's nice once.

SPEAKER_04 14:10

That's yeah, now that they're in the same size, but like, do they even make boxes big enough to like not, you know, like do they make them big enough to where it like actually lasts a long time?

SPEAKER_02 14:20

No.

SPEAKER_04 14:20

I think it's like 160. That's it.

SPEAKER_02 14:23

But that doesn't last.

SPEAKER_04 14:24

Like, honestly, that's like such a piece of like crap because like you know that the your kid's gonna probably be in diapers for longer than 160 days, and like they're probably gonna be in a size for longer than 160 days. You know what I mean? Like she should make them. Maybe it's a size, but like I don't know. I mean, we've been five way for them to make more money. Yeah, I don't know if Noah ever got past five. Like, I know they'd make them up to like size seven, yeah. But she was in a five, and then she she I think, yeah, she was one she wanted a potty train early, which I was like, let's do it. This is where Charlie's gonna like stop. Fives, yeah, yeah. Has she shown any interest in yeah, okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 15:03

I think we're like getting there.

SPEAKER_04 15:04

So yeah, this the the potty training. Also, won't miss that, but I've heard girls are easier, so I'm just I think I'm in for a tree with crew because I've heard boys are very difficult to potty train, which you know, my husband pees on the floor still to this day. He claims it's because there's just a long way down. He's 6'5, so they're like he's like, there's the toilet's not high enough. And I'm like, why am I taking excuse? Why am I having to take a mop to the floor every couple days? No, I mean that would send me a we have to hover and pee.

SPEAKER_03 15:36

And we still am in pretty much. I mean, not in your home toilet.

SPEAKER_04 15:39

Oh, I don't give a fuck. Honestly, mine I'll sit on whatever toilet, unless it's a porta potty. I don't care. I think I have no hover.

SPEAKER_02 15:46

Honestly, I do. I just had the conversation. I'm like, done. I do not hover, I sit unless there's like pee that I can see. Yeah, no, if there's like a full case, like I still sit.

SPEAKER_04 15:56

No, if no, no, I will wipe the toilet first before I if someone pees, like we don't get. Like, if you're gonna hover, at least clean up after yourself. Like, you know what I mean? Like, don't leave all straight.

SPEAKER_01 16:07

Like, are you hovering like a foot above? I'm confused. I think I have a dermaphobia thing because I cannot do it. I have to wash my hands like three times. Maybe not three times. I'm not that OCD, but like after you like I just wash my hands so much during the day. I do one thing, I wash my hands, I do another thing, I use hand sanitizer. I don't know what it is, but that's not a dumb thing.

SPEAKER_04 16:27

It's called OCD, and you should get on meds for that. I'm going back. We've had this discussion. Oh, yeah. That's one thing I will be always an advocate for. Won't miss it. Take your meds. Ladies and gentlemen, take your meds. Because it's not fun going. Raw dog in life. It's not worth it. If you're if you're if you are mentally ill or you're just feeling a little sad, you know, just give get get something because there are so many options. Get some get something.

Beach Trip Planning With Kids

SPEAKER_04 16:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 16:56

So Gabby, you were talking about our beach trip and I'm so excited packing for that. Can we it's just I feel like I should start next week. And it's in what August? Then it's in five months.

SPEAKER_01 17:10

Well, I was just thinking about like packing for like the first time going on a flight too. I was asking, I think, both you guys so many questions because we flew from here to Puerto Rico, and on the way back was so rough because our flight got delayed like six hours, and Bowie at that point was like a little sick and done, and I didn't have enough breast milk, so I was breastfeeding like in public, which whatever, I don't care. But I was over at that point. Yeah, but like the amount of stuff that you had to pack, and then note to self, I will get an actual stroller cover thing because it doesn't come with your stroller for the flying.

SPEAKER_03 17:46

And you can put all the shit in the floor, and you can put all of it. So we go on an annual beach trip. We get a big house for what four or five nights, and there's ten adults. This year will be five, five, five kids. Last year when we went, they were all like one month, but they were both.

SPEAKER_04 18:03

Yeah, I was two months. So I was like three weeks out. Really? That was wild. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:09

I think a lot about it, and I was like, I think I was I was so sad. I I think so. I was like, I really like enjoyed it, but I just felt like looking back, I was like, I think I was like really not in a good spot. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 18:22

I mean I was unwell the first go-round, so I could totally see how like it's it's a the roller coaster of emotions. I cried even with Crew, I cried so much. And I mean, I still cry all the time, but it's just it's with your first baby, like that's that surge of hormones that's like has to ramp up when you're pregnant. And then as soon as the baby's born, it's like in the high of like, oh, I just had a baby and he's out, and now I'm feeling like a million bucks for like three days. And then once like the thrill of like family coming over and like seeing you, and then when family leaves, it's like everything hits you like a ton of bricks, and you're just like, Oh shit, oh shit. And you're like, What did I do? And then it's just everything just is so sad, at least for me. Yeah, I did binge watch Animal Kingdom this time with um boy that was that show was so fucking good.

SPEAKER_01 19:17

You should watch the Matt Madison. It's another Taylor Sheridan universe. It was really good. Yeah. Traveling with kids.

SPEAKER_04 19:25

Traveling with kids, I mean, it's one of those things that's kind of like a necessary evil. Like, if you want to do anything, my parents just chose not to travel really with kids, and which I mean, respect. I get it. You had three, that's a lot of money. Also, they should like having three kids and traveling, just like this is gonna be fun. It's like who are you trying to convince? You know, I mean, like, you're stressed, your kids are like trying, you're not actually relaxing on this this trip because you're making sure all your kids are like not getting too sunburnt, they're not gonna drown, they're not gonna do XYZ. I'm sorry, but the beach with kids is covered in sun for me. The sand for me.

SPEAKER_03 20:06

I was just traveling on a sign. I love to, but the beach, yeah. I don't even like myself being sand. Yeah, you don't like the beach.

SPEAKER_04 20:15

I mean, uh I like the beach, but travel but going to the beach with kids, like I get so like my autism just goes crazy. That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 20:23

Because the sand if that you like sitting on a beach when it's 90 degrees, your feet can't touch the sand, the sand is in every crevice. See, I think you might get eaten by what's in the ocean. Yes, don't go snorkeling. Also, you sweat to death carrying all your shit from your car.

SPEAKER_04 20:41

And now you're sand like Fort Fisher. Yes. You smell Fort Fisher, and they're probably sunburned. You gotta go to Fort Fisher, tell me you actually like that. My car was literally as crazy in sand.

SPEAKER_01 20:52

The only thing, yeah, but your car gets caked in sand and everything. There's evidence that you went to the beach for the next six months. And then like your Airbnb has sand everywhere, and you get a oh, a tasty gram about the ick with the like I can't wait for the beach.

SPEAKER_04 21:07

Yeah, I'll be going to the beach. I will go to the beach with you. We did. It was like the shirt. Yeah, no, I mean I like going to the beach regardless, like, but I do get the ick when it comes to like having a kid that wants to play in the sand. Having a four-year-old that's like, let's play in the sand. I'm like, absolutely not. So that's why we get a place with a pool. Yes, because kids like look at the beach, yeah. Appreciate the beach. I could be in the pool.

SPEAKER_01 21:34

Yeah. I'm gonna go run on the beach with Kayla.

SPEAKER_04 21:35

Shout out. Oh my god. Good for you guys. Yeah, y'all have fun. I won't be there. It's called a vacation. I'm not working out.

SPEAKER_01 21:41

That's like my one chance. Like, Adam, you grab Bowie, I'm gonna head out and go. Well, you go right out 4 a.m.

SPEAKER_04 21:47

So your kids probably asleep anyway.

SPEAKER_01 21:50

No.

SPEAKER_04 21:50

We'll see pop in bottles from the most as when you get back. Okay. Yeah, I will be saying goodnight to you when you're getting up to run. I'll be like, you know what?

SPEAKER_01 22:00

I'm always hung over to when I'm like, oh, I gotta go brian. It'll make me feel better. No, no. It won't. And then I do feel better because afterwards. I'm like, I ran now. I can drink and then I'm good. Maybe I'll try to work out this year.

SPEAKER_04 22:14

I always did that in Maine. Like we would always like work out and stuff with like Gil's sisters are really good and they run every morning with Gil's dad. And I'm always just like waking up at like 11 and I'm like, sub. I'll just come back from our like nine mile run. I'm like, oh, get the fuck out of here with that shit. But I would like try to do like yoga or something, but I do not run. I don't run. I can't do it. I've I wouldn't run if my life depended on it. If I'm unless I'm being chased or not even then. I mean, I might run for my life, but I can't run for sport. It's just not a thing. I can't, I don't, I don't get it. I get it. I can't get on that train.

SPEAKER_01 22:52

I get it now.

SPEAKER_04 22:53

I don't.

SPEAKER_01 22:54

I like the feeling of. But anyways, yeah, packing when you travel, packing for breast when you're breastfeeding. I don't think I could enjoy it because I was so nervous about I was just I don't know. I'm just anxious about everything.

Breast Milk Drama At TSA

SPEAKER_04 23:08

Yeah. Well, I traveled while breastfeeding to Maine. It's a lot of people. When no, it was five months and I almost got taken away by TSA security because I about for I verbally assaulted a TSA agent. And like I close. I mean, Gil said that I was, he was like, and I was like, you know what? No. You need to communicate what you're doing when you have the my child's lifeline in your hands. RDU, shout out, y'all did great. They communicated what they were doing. Boston Logan Airport. F you, you did not do great. And the girl just like straight like threw this bottle of milk, my breast milk, into a black hole, which like I don't when you think about a black hole other than like outer space, what do you think of? A trash can. And when you have a bottle of you know shampoo that it doesn't meet the criteria that, like, whatever is it, 4.5, 3.4 ounces, whatever that stupid number is, you they throw it away. They don't even say anything. They're like, eat, eat in the trash. And so when that happened, and I was normally, if it was something that of mine, I wouldn't have said anything. Or I'd have been like, okay, well. But I just like, I it was a reflex. I was like, what are you doing with my breast milk? And she was like, I'm putting it in the tester. And I said, Well, you're supposed to know. Okay, well, that looks like a trash can. Like, you need to communicate. She's like, Why would I throw away your breast milk? And I said, I don't know, ladies. Because you're the tomato. Yeah, you're TSA and you hate your life.

SPEAKER_01 24:41

And like What if she put it in the wrong bed?

SPEAKER_04 24:43

Yeah, I have no idea what you're doing. So that's why you communicate. And Kill's like, You're gonna get us, like, you're gonna get like, you know, detained by TSA. And I'm like, you know, well, honestly. Episode five. Katie's detained by TSA. Yeah. Hey, I'm gonna need you guys to come bail me out of the airport jail. I'm in zip tie handcuffs. I don't remember RDU testing my breasts. Was it frozen? If it's frozen, they don't. If it wasn't in your checked bag or no, I had a lunch box.

SPEAKER_01 25:13

I remember they did something, but I also tipped this girl at work told me she's like, you should ask them to change their gloves because they never change their gloves and then they touch your breast milk.

SPEAKER_04 25:21

And I was like, I shut up, but I was so nervous. It's the plastic outer part. Give us a hoot. I don't remember. Like, I've literally dropped my kids' pacifier in public and just been like I think some water. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:35

The pacifier like always lands upward. I think that's how they designed it. Well, like it like my kids don't do passies anymore.

SPEAKER_04 25:43

So crew is like, eh.

SPEAKER_01 25:45

Bowie man is screaming his head off. He likes a passy for naps. Oh, if if you're trying to get him to nap. We do a nap. Bedtime, he's like me. Yeah. Oh. But anyway, moving on. So yeah, traveling with kids, it's not great.

SPEAKER_03 26:00

Just uh test out everything before you go to. It's a learning, it's a learning experience. Dylan and I traveled a lot with Charlie when she was younger, and I feel like we got good at it. Like both of our parents don't live here, so we had to travel to see my mom travel to see his mom.

SPEAKER_04 26:12

So we got traveled pretty good at it. I haven't traveled yet, like on a flight with two. I'm like kind of nervous because we're flying to Maine in August. I'm just I mean, it'll be fine because like Gil, but Gil is like so anxious to do it without his parents. Like his parents were gonna go on the same flight because like they live right here. But he's so nervous, I think, to do it because he's not a great flyer. So it's pretty much all on me when he's nervous in general because of the flight. Yeah, well, he doesn't like to fly, and then also like navigating the airport for him is well, obviously the airplane's the worst part. I can see why. But he once he is like he has to medicate to fly, and once he's medicated, he I he's at a commission, so like it's all on me. So it has to be very strategic when we fly because he's like high as a kite, and I'm over here just like navigating two kids. So I yeah, we'll see how it goes. Yeah, you'll have yeah, we'll have Ken and Lydia because I was like, oh, we might have to do like go on a separate day, and he's like, No, we can't do it. I'm like, okay. The first time we flew with Noah, we were arguing about how to get the car seat and the stroller into the bag.

SPEAKER_03 27:26

That was hard. That's Dylan's domain. Yeah, that's it.

SPEAKER_04 27:29

We so I that's my domain. Gil's not, he, if he sees like something that looks a little like a little bit challenging, he's like, it's not gonna be, it can't be done. It's done, you know, he's just like, nope, not gonna fit. And I said, just like let me do it. And so then this pilot who was waiting to fly our plane was sitting at our gate and was just watching us and watching our interaction. He's like, You guys remind me of my wife and I when we had young kids, and I was like, Like, cool, wanna jump in? Yeah, I was like, You wanna help out? This is hope. Yeah, this is no, I figured it out, and I said, and he's like, No, it can't be done. And I said, Okay, just just watch me do it. And I figured it out, and we were able to fit both pieces of you know, into one bag, and it was great. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:12

Anyway, so we practiced. Well, Adam practiced a couple times, but I do think I need to buy that stroller thing that we're gonna do.

SPEAKER_04 28:20

You do because IKEA bags they will yeet your shit across a damn they like do not care.

SPEAKER_03 28:25

They will just throw We thought we had one and yeah, we will put the car seat, the stroller, a pack of diapers, our winter coats in that bag. Anything in that, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 28:35

Just make it like kind of like cushion the blow because they are not gentle when it comes to yeah. But it is nice that you can check it out the gate.

SPEAKER_01 28:42

That's true, and you get to board first too. Which I don't know if I like want to do now that he's more active. You have to ask. At least some places do.

SPEAKER_04 28:51

Like you have to know.

SPEAKER_01 28:52

They say who's got kids in family, and I'm like, yes, make it. It's old people, yeah, and people can wheel changes.

SPEAKER_04 28:58

Oh, really? Yeah, okay. And it's weary. Whenever I've flown with kids, they've let me board first. But they like I've like one time I feel like I had to, I don't remember. Maybe not. I don't know now, though, we board last.

SPEAKER_01 29:10

Yeah, they need to like run around.

SPEAKER_04 29:11

Well, yeah, they need a board, like with toddlers, you need to board last. Yeah, we have an hour or two on this. Sorry. Yeah, but all things to look forward to. Yeah. If you don't have kids yet, this is this is where it's great because nothing is ever just like get up and go. No. You have it is like weeks of planning. Weeks. I mean, yeah, no, I've already started a list of like shit. We're gonna be for the beach.

SPEAKER_01 29:35

Spontaneous baby gates, five.

SPEAKER_04 29:37

One kid. Everybody bring their own baby gate. Everyone that doesn't have a kid, bring a baby gate. Oh, yeah, yeah. Noah can open baby gates, so we have to figure out I gotta make sure that she's not like like opening gates. She's like Charlie Litton. Like Charlie's like, like my friend of mine that did that on my birthday. Oof. It's like life alert down the stairs. Yeah, every kid gets a life alert. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 30:01

So I was like, everybody gets a life alert necklace. At least we won't be freshly postpartum. Yeah, I'm excited this time around. I'm not gonna breastfeed. Well, I better if I'm I'm not gonna even say anything.

SPEAKER_04 30:12

What? Well, now you have to say it. So I don't even know what you're trying to get at.

SPEAKER_01 30:16

I'm better, like, I don't want no accidents before. You got five months to not get pregnant, is what you're saying. Yes. I don't want no problems for most of them that I'm trying to enjoy this summer.

SPEAKER_04 30:28

I know I'm so excited.

SPEAKER_01 30:29

Being pregnant in the summer, not it's not for the I enjoyed going to the the pool just like every day.

SPEAKER_04 30:35

Because we were floating because that's all we could do, was just loved that. I miss I wish Ava was coming to this year. I don't think she's coming, but like she would she would play with Noah in the pool and I would just be like floating away. Like my belly was so tan because it was just like closest to the sun, I guess, because it was so big. I was gonna say I hated the pool. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 30:55

Well, yeah. We'll try and chase Charlie around while I was eight months pregnant.

SPEAKER_01 30:58

Yeah. I also apparently like you're not supposed to be in the pool because you don't know if your water's gonna break. Oh fuck off. That's so stupid. There's a pool spread.

SPEAKER_04 31:07

Yeah, I can't keep up.

SPEAKER_01 31:08

But I hated water.

SPEAKER_04 31:10

Yeah, that's dumb. I've never heard that, and I I will stand by that like do what you jacuzzi's I've heard that like makes your baby like a poached egg or something. I get that. The jacuzzi, I get, but that's the pool you need. But the pool, come on. Like, you know, you can't smoke crack, you can't smoke cigarettes, you can't drink, you can't. I mean, you could, but you shouldn't. Well, no, I'm quoting uh not trending. You can't jump, you can't jump on trampolines, you can't eat sushi. Like, this is just a list of things you can't do. Uh, you know, and it but like there's just there's so many things you can't do, and you're gonna take the pool away from me when my babies do in July. Get out of here.

SPEAKER_01 31:48

Floating in water, in water. Yeah, people have water birth. They're double watering it in the pool. And they must love that shit.

SPEAKER_04 31:55

Yeah, they're just like bouncing, yeah, bopping around. But yeah.

Breastfeeding Pressure And Formula Truth

SPEAKER_03 31:59

But this year it will be better. It will be better. We will not be freshly postpartum.

SPEAKER_04 32:04

Oh, my boobs will be normal size, you know, leaking out. I still won't. You know, the thing that I hated the most about breastfeeding is like when your boobs start tingling. Uh I hated that. When you're just like, it's like your your inner alarm clock that's like, oh, you no more fun. You have to go pump. You know what I mean? Like it's so annoying. I just remember like that. Well, it would, it starts as the tingle for me. It was the tingle, the nipple tingle.

SPEAKER_01 32:32

It would just be like I don't remember. I think I blocked it out.

SPEAKER_04 32:35

Oh, well, uh, because I was really bad about not waking up in the middle of the night to pump. Yeah, I didn't either.

SPEAKER_03 32:40

That's insane. I didn't I would wake up soaking wet. Oh, I didn't too.

SPEAKER_04 32:44

My moons would be rock hard and they would be I my shirt would just have milk all over it. And I'm like, you know what? My sleep's more important. I don't care. And like people were like, oh, your supply. I'll the supplement, whatever I need to.

SPEAKER_01 32:56

I don't I think next time I might actually either like pump if he's as he or she, I probably boy, is asleep. And then start formula combo a little earlier because like making enough milk for daycare. It's so a lot of milk. I couldn't, you could I couldn't do it, like you have to make double. Yeah, you can't unrealistic.

SPEAKER_04 33:15

Yeah, it's just yeah. I mean, I just did it with Noah, I tried, and then I was like, I'm not making enough, and I felt so guilty rating. Start formula, which is stupid. Don't ever yeah, your Fed is best. I stand by that. That's a hill I will dial on. If you have anything to say, put it in the comments, and we're gonna delete them. So meh. But anywho, yeah, Fed is best. Give your baby formula, it's they're gonna be fine, and you're gonna be happier. Yep. Your kid needs food, and if you're not making enough, it doesn't make you a bad like. I mean, you're gonna tell a mom that like has to be in the hospital for an extended amount of time from health complications that can't breast you that she's a bad mom, get out of here. So, anywho, yeah, there's so many situations. Yeah, so yeah, I just I I value my sleep, and I know second time around that it's not gonna kill my kid to have formula because I tried to do it with Noah, and I my mental health, my physical health, everything suffered because of an a weird pressure that I felt only from myself, yeah, was taking control of my life. So that's why I think, you know, do what you gotta do.

SPEAKER_01 34:23

And like making sure you're mentally like like you're kind of saying, like being present is better and your kid being fed than feeling all the pressure from no one else.

SPEAKER_04 34:33

Right. And I felt like both, well, with both, but mostly with Noah, like because I was like trying to do 100% breastfeeding and you know, exclusively pumping when I went back to work. I felt like I couldn't be a hundred percent in either place. I was either worried about pumping or worried about like my you know, breastfeeding, or I was worried, and then when I was at work, I was anxious about leaving, you know, leaving to pump or whatever it was. Like I just like couldn't be a hundred percent anywhere. And I felt like that, you know, taking that pressure off of myself really helped me be able to like be present in the moment and actually go to work and do my job as a nurse. It's not an easy job in itself, and then adding that extra layer of stress of pumping to it. Oh my god, it was so stressful. And like stuff you gotta bring together. Yeah, well, yeah, it's like a whole you have to pack your whole life, you know, ice packs, you forgot your pump. I was just gonna say, I texted you guys that one night.

SPEAKER_03 35:27

I was like, yo, I'm starting my 12-hour shit. What did you dream of doing? I had to hand to hand to steal a hand pump thing.

SPEAKER_02 35:35

So I'm sitting on the floor of the bathroom, like you're like gosh, like a cow.

SPEAKER_04 35:39

Yeah, it's for 45 minutes.

SPEAKER_03 35:41

Oh, I was told hand pumps are like they do work they work well if you have an hour.

SPEAKER_04 35:46

Yeah, yeah, which you don't have. Like, I get 30 minutes for lunch, or you know, I mean, like luckily I had hand, you know, the portable pumps with both kids, but you're there don't they don't you know get out as much as you would with a regular pump or a hand pump. And so like I with Noah, I would try to like use my portables during like that three-hour window when I work at an ICU. You can't step away every five minutes or every you know, not every five minutes, but as often exactly when you need to. And then, but like for lunch, I would try to like sit there and pump with my like spectra. So you brought both. Well, I was in Charlotte when I was when I had Noah, so I would bring my spectra, but I brought both pumps to work. And so because I because my L I had the LV the first go around, and eh, that was a very expensive pump. I love Spectra, yeah. The LV pump was very expensive and it's a huge learning curve. Like, there's a lot of parts, extra parts that they don't give you in the $500 package that you buy. So that was some bullshit. So yeah, I would have to use my spectra just to be able to like feel some relief. And so, yeah, that one never used again. So if anybody has any pump questions, Katie's the one to ask. I think she owns like honestly, what five breast pumps because it is more again. I'm writing a memoir because I've had a lot of struggles with my boobs and my nipples. And I'm questions. I'm your girl. I also have lots of equipment. So yeah, I I know all the scriptures. Oh, that would be a great episode idea. It's doing like a breast pump. I have all my pumps still. I can do like a review. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 37:30

I'll add mine because I I'll be the pumpy, the okay.

SPEAKER_04 37:36

Well, they make shitty fucking robot vacuums.

SPEAKER_01 37:38

I don't have their vacuum. Oh, that is true.

SPEAKER_04 37:40

But that thing is just like cupcake running into walls.

SPEAKER_01 37:44

My dog doesn't have eyes. Their pump, I really I actually would use again. I liked it a lot. The mom cozy, I liked the mom cozy. The one I got, I couldn't. You got a different one. Did you have the M9? I did so much research. And yeah, that's the one I had. I liked it. S12. The one with the top. And I honestly, I think I just wasn't getting my pumping schedule down. So I think that also didn't play into it.

SPEAKER_03 38:06

It's a whole learning dog, honestly. It was a lot. Go ahead. No, go ahead.

SPEAKER_04 38:13

No, just the things that they don't tell you about like motherhood is like breastfeeding and pumping is like a whole nother game. It's yeah, like they these dumbass lactation consultants that come in after they're like, oh, let me just tell you everything you need to know in a 15-minute consultation and tell you how they make you feel like you're a terrible mother because you aren't doing it right. And then they leave, and then the next day another one comes and tells you something completely different. At least that was my experience.

SPEAKER_01 38:45

Did you have I had one person? I only had one person come. I had two people.

SPEAKER_03 38:52

The hospital I delivered at for both of them didn't have lactation consultants. They they trained their nurses in lactation. Oh. So it was kind of nice. Because my thing is like lactation usually only works like 9-5 for the most part. What do you do after?

SPEAKER_04 39:08

So like all the nurses were like specialty.

SPEAKER_01 39:11

That is nice. Actually, I only had one.

SPEAKER_04 39:13

That was nice. I only had one with crew because we dipped out like so fast.

SPEAKER_01 39:18

I wonder if it's the same lady.

SPEAKER_04 39:20

I don't remember.

SPEAKER_01 39:20

But no one taught me anything. The only thing I learned was from like Instagram, Carrie Locker, which was great. And then I'll be right back. Oh, yeah, she's great.

SPEAKER_04 39:28

She has like 900 breast pumps. That's because her whole Instagram account is breastfeeding.

SPEAKER_01 39:32

But that's all I know is from you. You're on the track. Yeah. Huh? You're on the track.

SPEAKER_04 39:36

Honestly, you know, like I could be I could be an expert.

SPEAKER_01 39:40

You should probably be maybe not a lactation consultant, but you could.

SPEAKER_04 39:44

I could, but I don't want to do that.

SPEAKER_01 39:46

You could be a pump consult. Well let me tell you the best pump for your nipples. Yeah. Because that's a whole science.

SPEAKER_04 39:52

Well, there's like inverted nipples, then there's like big nipples, and there's little nipples, and then there's very elastic y nipples. Unfortunately, I'm not gonna tell you which ones, but I have two or three out of that. So that's part of my issue with the, you know, my whole memoir is gonna be kind of like there's only chapters, like you have elastic nipples. Well, listen up. Here you are.

SPEAKER_01 40:16

Ask sessions, do your research, and take the lactation consultant with a grain of salt if they stop in for five seconds.

SPEAKER_04 40:22

Also, you're not a bad mom if you can't figure it out. Well, and you're just like your mental health doesn't allow it.

unknown 40:29

Guess what?

SPEAKER_00 40:30

You're still a good mom.

SPEAKER_04 40:31

Yeah, you're good.

Getting Your Pink Back Postpartum

SPEAKER_04 40:32

Yeah, you do.

SPEAKER_03 40:32

And talking about postpartum though, I feel like the last week I've started to like really what did you say the other day, Katie? Like you're getting your pink back. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 40:40

I love that for you.

SPEAKER_04 40:41

So if anybody doesn't know, flamingos, the you know, the bird, the avian creature, I don't know if they're bird specifically, but they the female flamingos lose their pink color when they after they have their babies, because I guess they're they are giving all they what they got to their babies. So they turn like a whitish pink, and then eventually it comes back. And so, you know, the mom culture has kind of adopted that. Um getting your pink back is kind of like getting back to yourself, which is such a beautiful thing. But it is, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 41:14

But I have felt that way in the last week. I'm like that. Yeah, like for the first time in two years, my face is finally clearing up. I'm like have a good routine down at the gym. Mentally, I feel like a very present mom. I'm like, do my job to the best that I can. So I'm like, okay, I'm starting to feel good again. But then, like in the back of my mind, I'm you know, Dylan are we want another baby? And I'm like, okay, I'm gonna get myself right back and like in a great spot.

SPEAKER_04 41:46

Just and then I'm gonna want another baby. That's kind of like where you're just like, are you gonna just like should you just give back, try to like work so hard in between babies, or is it better to just like eh, not super worried about it, and then kind of or you know what I mean? Like, I feel like some people are just like, whatever, I'm gonna have another baby, like I don't care. But you just stay in the mom phase until you're 100%. I just yeah, I can't do that.

SPEAKER_03 42:09

I feel like for me, I had I got pregnant and I was like in okay shape, not in the best. I got pregnant, and that was still postpartum when I got pregnant again. So I put my body through it for the last two years. So I feel like even when I get my pink back and then go to have our third child, I feel like I'll be in such a better spot when I think than I was anyway.

SPEAKER_04 42:33

Yeah, like physically being like, you know, no judgment for whatever you decide to do as I'm like if you can't work out, that's um that's your deal. But like for me, like being in shape and feeling strong with like both pregnancies, like it makes labor so much easier. Like not trying to flex, but like I mean, I had to be induced twice and I pushed Noah out in 15 minutes, and then with crew, it was two and a half pushes, so it was like maybe five minutes, and like not saying that that's that's like if you work out, like that's gonna be what happens to you. I mean, I'm my mom thinks I have some connective tissue disorder and I'm very stretchy. Might be why I have elastic nipples. I don't know, Ange, but I got very stretchy skin, so that may be why that I could push kids out really quickly, and I don't have any of the compet I have nine and a half pound babies. So well, crew was eight, they were not coming out. They were not coming out easily. Yeah, that's true. I mean, crew is eight, six, but he was three weeks early. Can you imagine what size he would have been if he was on top? You would have a C-section at that point. I mean, Elizabeth Gil's sister pushed out a pretty large baby. I can't. Like 11 pounds. Yeah, that's hard. Yeah. Isn't that wild?

SPEAKER_01 43:46

But yeah, I don't feel like my pink is back. I'm at 15%. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 43:50

Okay. That's fair. I mean, let's elaborate a little bit. Like, I mean, yeah, it took me a long ass time with after my first baby.

SPEAKER_01 43:57

It's because it's like I feel like I get into a groove and then I'm like, what can I change up? Let me do this now. Like it's like, okay, I had a baby and now let me get a new job. Now let me do that. Like it's like I never can like just coast in where I'm at.

SPEAKER_03 44:09

Into your routine. I think that's the biggest thing is like when you have a baby, whether you have your first or into your second, you have to build that routine. Yeah, I can't figure it out.

SPEAKER_04 44:22

To be habit, but in a routine.

SPEAKER_00 44:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 44:24

Yeah. I mean, even I'll say, like, even after Noah, like it took me a long time to get back to what feeling somewhat like myself. But then, like, you know, you think you have it all figured out for the second one, and then they come and you're like, okay, cool. Everything that I prepared for is not working. And you have to shift it again. And so, like, I was hoping I would have another girl, and I'd be like, you know, things would be kind of every baby's different, but I felt like, oh, if I had another girl, like I know girls. And so, like, and for me, this pregnancy was the second pregnancy was so different. Like, I thought the first pregnancy was bad mentally. Like, I had a lot of like mental health struggles. But this pregnancy, thankfully, I was medicated the way that I was supposed to be medicated for the first one. But I had a lot more physical problems this pregnancy. I had, you know, I was hypertensive with both babies, but this time it came on earlier. With Noah, it was like a very late onset. With crew, it was like at 21 weeks or something. So I had high blood pressure the whole time. So I was having to go twice a week, up like at a certain point. And then I was like, you know, having to get the like the non-stress test done. And they're like, oh, you know, it's rare, but if your baby doesn't do what they're supposed to do within the time frame, then you have to go to the emergency room. And like, that's rare. And guess who's ass had to go to the emergency room twice? Me. So of course, you know, and then I had polyhydramniose, which is like the excess fluid. And then I had pregnancy carpal tunnel, which I don't even know what that's saying. Like my hands were numb for like the first four months of put being postpartum. Because they're like, oh, it goes away, but they don't say when it goes away. So my hands, my fingers were numb. And then trying to like navigate wiping a baby that has a different bodily, you know, like having a different anatomy, like wiping a penis. Oh, with especially penis with being circumcised. It's very delicate having to like do all these extra things and screaming newborn.

SPEAKER_01 46:23

I felt so bad. I was like, is crew screaming like bowing? Because I just feel so bad.

SPEAKER_04 46:28

I, the first couple of days, I was like, Gil, like you gotta take over because I couldn't feel my hands. So I'm like, I was having a hard time gripping the diaper, and he was screaming his head off. So I had to wake him up a few times in the middle of the night to be like, You gotta use this diaper, dude. Like, I can't feel my fingers. And like having, you know, a little penis. Like, I'm just like and they're peeing on both things in his face. I was like, whoa. I know that's one thing that I was not ready for. It was like the the peeing in their own face.

SPEAKER_01 46:57

That was wow. He got into his eye one time. Yeah. Like, that's impressive.

SPEAKER_04 47:00

Gil said that creepy on him like a couple weeks ago, and I was like, damn, that sucks. I he hasn't done that to me and since he was like a baby baby. But yeah, so I think that's the biggest thing though.

SPEAKER_03 47:10

Like when you have a baby, the learning curve that you have to go through, like for you, it was girl to boy, and then like your second pregnancy. But when you have kids, I think one of the hardest parts is that you're gonna have to sacrifice something in order to do something else. So for me, like I like going to the gym. I have to sacrifice sleep to go to the gym. I wake up at 5 45. To go to the gym. So it's been a good time. And now it's been like now I've built it into my habit. Yeah. So now it's not as hard. And I look forward to it. But I mean, you can't do everything. So you have to find like, okay, where am I gonna, if I want this, whatever it is, what it's running or working out, where am I gonna put it in?

SPEAKER_01 47:54

Yeah. I was just talking to someone actually at work, what you talked about about preparing for like having a baby. We were talking, like, she was like, I have a friend that's pregnant, and like they're asking all these questions, and like I want to give her everything. I don't want to overwhelm her, but at the same time, and both of us were like, you just can't you can prepare all you want, but until like you kind of push them out, like you're kind of just figuring out.

SPEAKER_04 48:16

Well, yeah, and I think that there's no level of preparation that's going to prepare you fully. Like, there's an I don't think any mother in history has ever been like, oh yeah, I was totally ready. I like had everything pat down pat. Like, you yeah, like you need to have like all the equipment. But then, like, I mean, there's so many Amazon orders after I had my kids, like the things that I used first time, like time around with Noah didn't work with crew. And then, you know, especially just there were just different things, like baby, each baby's different, each pregnancy is different. And even if you have had 10 kids, like that that 11th baby will be the one that needs the special formula or the special whatever it is. And so I just don't think that there's any way for you can to be fully prepared.

SPEAKER_01 49:00

I'd like to know 19 kids and counting. I'd I'd like to know if Michelle Duggar, you guys. Did she hit a point where she was like prepared for the 19th one or the 20th? Like, I'd like to know her thoughts.

SPEAKER_04 49:10

All the sexual assault allegations against her children or her the first child. I think like I wouldn't really come to you for an hour.

SPEAKER_01 49:18

I'm just curious, like after the 20th, how are you feeling, girl?

SPEAKER_04 49:21

Uh she's probably fine because her daughters who were getting through the all the trauma that they've had to endure by raising the 19th and 20th kid. Yeah, they were parentified. So don't even get me started on that

Friendship Community And Mom Support

SPEAKER_04 49:33

family.

SPEAKER_03 49:33

I think that's like maybe we were already very close, like we were best friends. But then I think finding out that we were all pregnant at the same time and then kind of navigating pregnancy, yeah, and then post-mardom and now having kids that are the same age made us that much closer because we could relate in a lot of different ways. Not saying that we had the same experience.

SPEAKER_04 49:54

We all experienced such different but just being able to bounce off each ideas off of each other, be like, yo, is this normal? Like, you know, and I think at least it it kind of makes you feel like you have like that little little community of like, you know, you're you don't feel crazy, you don't feel, you know, alone in it. And I think that was like for me, the first go-around was like really isolating.

SPEAKER_01 50:18

You were the first one out.

SPEAKER_04 50:19

Yeah, I was the first one, but also like, you know, I was having a lot of issues, you know, with a friend of ours. Well, she's not a friend anymore, but she kind of made me feel like more of a freak. And I know that being pregnant does not make you feel like a freak, but it was just kind of like I felt very alone in it, and I felt like I was having, you know, a lot of mental health stuff going on. And it was just like everybody, you know, just wasn't I didn't it didn't feel like anyone understood what I was going through. And that was very, you know, upsetting to feel like that alone. So like the second go-around, having, you know, having friends around you that are going also that are going through it, but also, you know, understand where I'm coming from was like it's was a lot more comforting.

SPEAKER_03 51:01

I remember saying to you after I had Charlie that my understanding for you as a m like I feel like as a friend and everything, like you know, we have a great group of friends, but once I became a mom, I was like, I understand you so much better.

SPEAKER_04 51:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 51:17

You know, and not that I didn't before.

SPEAKER_04 51:20

Yeah. But it just it changed. Yeah, yeah. And that's like I've said, you know, so many times, like, you know, respectfully, you're not you you don't understand what you know women go through, like it, you know, until you are experience it yourself. Like, I mean, being a there's so many different ways to become a mom. And you know, I I'm not gonna knock that. And but like going through that experience is something that changes your life, obviously, but it changes your brain chemistry. And, you know, and that's just fine, bitch. So you can't you can't deny that, you know. So like your brain rewires itself. And so like I'm very self-aware when it comes to my mental health. And so for me, like I just knew that I was like kind of falling apart and trying to like not fall apart in front of everybody was really hard because I just like you know, you want to like still be the fun, you don't want to be, I didn't want to be like the lame pregnant one. Like, I just kind of wanted to like be able to like go and have fun with everybody, and it was still it was really hard. And I was also I was under a lot of pressure with like travel nursing and stuff. That was like that's a lot just like you know, pandemic, like where my life was. Yeah, it was a lot.

SPEAKER_03 52:30

But yeah, I feel like I can be a much more suff supportive friend to my friends that are pregnant now.

SPEAKER_04 52:36

Now that I'm on the other side of it, I'm like, okay, I kind of yes, like know how to support you better than I did before. And I think that's like one of the most beautiful things about motherhood, you know, it's a community. It's a community. And for me, like I my one of my friends who had their her daughter before I had my daughter, you know, I had a hard time like being that person for her. And like I feel like it's every like it's like this like kind of a generational thing where it's like she had her her friend that had an o a baby or an older child that was kind of her person. And then for me, when I was having my baby, she was my person. And then, you know, going once you got pregnant with Charlie, like I was that person for you, and then we were that person. And then I had both of them. Yeah, she's the luckiest one. She had two. But you pass it down, you pass it down, and you're you are being that person for somebody else. Like, you know, you don't realize that you weren't the that that yeah, you know, not in any, I mean, not ill will.

SPEAKER_03 53:36

No, not in a negative way.

SPEAKER_04 53:37

I just like that way.

SPEAKER_03 53:38

I just feel like it's your understanding changes.

SPEAKER_04 53:40

Right. And like for for me, like my friend Anna, you know, I didn't realize that I wasn't being as good of a friend as I probably should have been to her when she was in going in the thick of it with being pregnant and postpartum because I didn't know. Right. And then when I had Noah, I like went back to her and I was like, dude, I'm really sorry. And she was just like, no, it's you know, fine, whatever. And I was like, no, like I just want you to know that like I should have been it should have been different, and I'm sorry for that. And like I just, you know, you don't really know what you don't know, kind of thing. But um it's a beautiful thing to kind of like realize that and being that person for another, you know, friend is like is it's a nice like the gift that you can give back to someone else.

SPEAKER_01 54:25

I actually saw a post very like literally to that tea, it was like to all the post my all my postpartum moms, like, I'm sorry I didn't realize what it you were going through at the time, but I get it now, and yeah, I will pass it down to the person.

SPEAKER_04 54:39

And that's like kind of like the the part of it. It's like you may not know it in the time, but the like the the best part of it is like being able to like repay that favor, you know.

SPEAKER_01 54:48

And and all the people now that are pregnant, like I'm like, okay, now I like I'm I'm so excited for them and now I know how to help them and excited to help them, and I hope they want my help and they understand this is my way of helping. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 55:00

Well, I think I think too that's like where this podcast kind of came from is like, you know, we obviously all related to each other in a very close way.

SPEAKER_04 55:11

Oh, yeah, that's as close as you can be.

SPEAKER_03 55:13

And but that was content in itself that like three best friends can sit and talk about pregnancy postpartum. Yeah, and kind of created a community in our own little selves.

SPEAKER_01 55:24

Helped me get rid of my birth control. So like all started it.

SPEAKER_04 55:28

I didn't work.

SPEAKER_01 55:29

I actually removed Gabby's IUD. Don't do this at home. The only reason was the beach trip. Yeah, oh yeah. We're all nurses, yeah. And I was trained on IUDs.

SPEAKER_04 55:39

Yeah, I'm also a healthcare professional. Taylor was like my sous chef, but like she was my hype man slash sous chef. I don't really know what you call it. It was it was me up in there, and I said, I feel it. You want me to pull it? And she said yes.

SPEAKER_02 55:52

It feels like fishing wire.

SPEAKER_04 55:53

You're like, yeah, yeah, it kind of does feel like fishing wire. So that that's can you be any closer than that? I don't think you can, people. That's that's a friendship you want to aspire to have. Is having friends that will remove your intrider in device. And then when you get pregnant, we put it in a plastic bag and they just like show it everybody. It's like saving your kids baby tea. You know, it's like you know, it's like mom did that. My mom did that too, and I wanted to be like, but why?

SPEAKER_01 56:20

What didn't you give it though after a while?

SPEAKER_04 56:22

I don't know. I'm assuming she probably threw them away at some point, but it's like or like your baby hair. But can you think about like when your kid loses a tooth and then you're like, okay, garbage. You know what I mean? Like, what do you do with it? It's such a big move. Taylor said, Yeah, yeah, 100%. Let's all appreciate that you had those teeth, and you now appreciate the new ones that come in. I don't know. It's like one of those things where you're just like, oh, should we throw it away? Yeah, or absolutely well.

Weird Keepsakes And Final Sign Off

SPEAKER_02 56:47

Dylan tried to keep their umbilical stomp, like it fell off. Like, I think I think honestly, I think that's disgusting.

SPEAKER_04 56:55

That thing stunk, like to high heaven. That shit went in the show.

SPEAKER_01 56:59

Boys fell off at aviator.

SPEAKER_04 57:01

Today? No, no. No, I was like, okay, he's nine months. Okay, that means when we all went to aviator. I thought the same.

SPEAKER_02 57:08

I was like, just today.

SPEAKER_01 57:09

No, that was not. We all went to a brewery when we were like I don't know, monthly post-part.

SPEAKER_04 57:15

Oh, yeah, that was was that that new aviator area. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 57:19

I was like, oh my god, finally.

SPEAKER_04 57:20

Oh my god. Noah smelled so fucking bad by the time it fell off. Like, I was so nervous about cleaning around it with her. So hers like hung on for dear life.

SPEAKER_01 57:29

That's like people that have you seen the post. I don't know if this is real. And do you? This is you. They keep their placenta like attached to the baby. Have you not?

SPEAKER_04 57:40

Okay, there's like the the delayed clamping.

SPEAKER_01 57:42

No, this is a whole ass placenta wrapped up and they keep it attached. I'll have to show you. Yeah, I think it's they keep it attached to the baby. Yeah, I know Kim Kardashian ate her placenta. It's literally a dead organ. Oh, stop. It's it's a little gnarly. I can't. Yeah. It's wild. Well, and on the I don't know if I I would ever do that. But do you. That's do your research. All right.

SPEAKER_02 58:06

Well, thank you for listening to Mamish. Motherhood isn't perfect, neither are we. Laugh, swear, hug your kids, sip your drink. You're Momish, and that's enough. Bye for now. Bye. Bye.