Nathan Chilton – Choosing Challenge Over Comfort

In Episode 8 of Rise To Your Everest, Adam sits down with chiropractor, father, and resilience advocate Nathan Chilton.

Nathan’s journey has been defined by adversity and an unwavering mindset to keep moving forward. After multiple major surgeries, including an internal hemipelvectomy where over 75% of his pelvis was replaced with a bespoke titanium implant and the ongoing challenge of living with type 1 diabetes, Nathan has been forced to confront uncertainty, fear, and recovery in ways most people will never experience.

Yet despite everything his body has endured, Nathan continues to choose challenge. He has stood on the APEX start line twice and is now preparing to take on a 75km endurance walk to raise funds for sarcoma research, even while navigating the reality of a tumour recurrence.

In this powerful and reflective conversation, Nathan shares how faith, mindset, movement, and fatherhood have helped him find strength during life’s toughest moments. From learning to stay present when the future feels uncertain, to discovering that progress matters more than perfection, Nathan’s story is a reminder that resilience is built one step at a time.

If you’ve ever faced adversity, questioned your strength, or needed a reminder that we are capable of far more than we believe, this episode will leave you inspired to keep climbing.

🧭 Topics Covered

• Living with type 1 diabetes
• Major surgery and recovery
• Navigating uncertainty and recurrence
• The role of mindset and faith in resilience
• Fatherhood and leading by example
• Endurance challenges and mental strength
• The power of presence and daily progress

🌐 Connect with Nathan

Instagram: @njchilton

🎙 About Rise To Your Everest

Rise To Your Everest explores resilience, mindset, and personal growth through honest conversations with people who push beyond comfort and keep climbing through life’s toughest challenges.

📬 Get in Touch:

https://www.instagram.com/adamclayton.apex/

https://www.instagram.com/apex.officialuk/

 🔥 Podcast powered by: https://apexchallenges.com/

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

In this episode of Rise to Your Everest, Adam sits down with Nathan's children, chiropractor, the father, and someone who has faced extraordinary physical and mental challenges with remarkable resilience. Nathan's journey has been shaped by major health battles, including multiple surgeries, a life-changing internal hemipelvectomy, where much of his pelvis was replaced with a bespoke titanium implant. And the ongoing reality of living with type 1 diabetes. Despite everything his body has endured, Nathan continues to choose challenge, even standing on the Apex Star line twice, and now preparing for a 75-kilometer endurance walk to raise funds for sarcoma research. In this conversation, we explore how mindset, faith, movement, and the power of presence can help us navigate life's toughest moments. Nathan shares what it means to keep climbing when the path is uncertain, and why progress, not perfection, is what truly matters. If you're facing adversity, searching for strength, or simply trying to be a little better each day, this episode is for you. Let's get into it.

SPEAKER_01 1:15

Nathan, welcome to Rise to Your Everest. You're someone who's faced multiple major surgeries, type 1 diabetes, and ongoing health uncertainty. And yet you've still chosen to stand on the Apex start line, not once, but twice. Given everything your body has been through, that says something about your mindset, and that's where I want to start this podcast today. So, Nathan, what makes you choose challenge instead of comfort?

SPEAKER_02 1:44

I think uh with any challenge, whether it's physical, mental, it's in that space. There's lots of uncertainty, lots of unknowns, and in that space you find out who you are at a deeper level, I think. And in particular with the challenges, well, I'd never really done any challenges as such prior to the surgery. I'd played sport fairly competitively, basketball, always been into kind of training, lifting weights. Um, but apex was the first, I was supposed to ultra ultra distance that I'd ever done. Um, but the reason why that came about, so the surgery um that we'll probably touch upon a bit more later, the someone told me after the surgery that I wouldn't be able to climb um Everest. And it got me thinking, I thought, okay, maybe attempt to base camp Everest, and then I'll struck scrolling on Instagram, and then your your advert came up, and I thought, oh, it's it's too good to be trial. Just sign up. It happened to be on the first on the mountain that I first climbed 10 months after the surgery, Hellvelin. So there was uh lots of synchronicities. So yeah, I signed up and chose to do that one just to, I guess, prove that individual wrong, even though it was more a personal journey, but also just to see how much I could push myself. Like my body was completely different. I was still, still am getting to know how my body reacts to certain stresses, emotional, physical. And I thought, why not? So I messaged Morris um and said, Do you fancy doing it? And yeah, we uh we signed up. So basically just to push myself, see what was possible and see what I could learn from that, take that forward into my life both day to day, but also, okay, what else can I do to physically push myself?

SPEAKER_01 3:44

Amazing. And let's let's go back to that surgery point then, because we were gonna get into it a bit later, but I think it's actually important to maybe start there and then we can work backwards from or even forwards from there because you didn't, yeah, you turned up with a lot of uncertainty, I guess. You weren't too sure how it was gonna go. Your first ultra challenge. Um, so talk us back, take us back to the surgery. Was it 2022?

SPEAKER_02 4:08

Yeah, so the the latest one was 2022, and before that, 2018-2013, but the one that had most significant impact was 2022. Um, the surgery name is called internal hemipelvectomy, where it basically means removing part of your pelvis. It was the right side, and about 75% of the bone had a um benign bone tumor in it called a chondroblastoma. Extremely rare, like less than 5% of all bone tumors like worldwide. And uh yeah, I happened to have it and it happened to keep coming back. So it got to the point where I was in quite a lot of pain, really struggling to walk, um, and it was really impacting my life, and there was no other option really. If it carried on growing, more bone would have got destroyed. So it was the decision was made. We'd watch and waited for a year or two. It steadily started growing back. Um, and then yeah, went into hospital December 2021. Got all geared up, ready, no food for 24, 36 hours. Thinking I was gonna have the surgery. Doctor came in and said it'd been cancelled 10 minutes before the surgery.

SPEAKER_03 5:27

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 5:27

So I there yeah, I don't think I've mentioned this for a while, I just remembered. Um, so like the the mindset of that, it was almost like this could have been my last um festive period with my family. So me, mum, um, Sarah, my partner, were went there on the way to Birmingham. So we went Manchester, Derby, had Christmas there, and then went to Birmingham. Sarah said goodbye, expected me to have surgery, come back. I rang her that morning and said it's been cancelled. So that was a like a rock bottom um and a pretty big pill to swallow and uh forgot about that, just getting goosebumps talking about that, and then left, went home. They were said, look, we're gonna reschedule it for three weeks. So then I had to go back. And I'm really grateful for that three-week period because I thought I was ready, but there were other things I could do. I went to the gym for another three weeks, uh, and worked on like my mindset. I was really present, spent time with Sarah, did things that I really wanted to do because the surgery had it has its had its risks, like chance of death, um, like leg loss, infection. So it wasn't a guarantee that the surgery would be successful. So I really embraced that three weeks. So I think it happened for a reason. And then we went back to hospital on the on the 8th of January. The prep was for two days, and then the actual surgery took um place on the 10th of January. Um, eight-hour surgery, um yeah, to remove 75% of the right side of my pelvis and hip um hip joint. So it's major surgery, quite rare actually. Um, and uh yeah, surgery was successful post-surgery. Um, I continued to lose a fair bit of blood through the drain. So I had to have quite a lot of blood transfusions. I was in ICU. Um, and at that at that point, I actually thought I was going to die. Um, my I was shaking uncontrollably. There was lots of doctors around me. I think I lost two, two and a half litres of blood. My blood pressure dropped to 32 over 18. Um, so yeah, I I actually in that moment thought I was taking my last breath. And I don't know if I'm sure lots of people have experienced this. I don't know if I would have classed it as near-death experience. I guess, I guess it was. Um, I've never really called it that. But yeah, I took a deep breath, freed out, and surrendered, knowing that I'd done everything that I could at this point in my life to to be the best version. Um and yet closed my eyes, everything went black, and then woke up. And at first I thought I was dead, actually. And then this nurse came up over to me and she looked at me and I think she could read my mind. She said, No, you're still here. And I was like, okay, I didn't know how to feel about that because like troops coming out my neck, at my arm, at my side, lots of beeping, um, no discomfort as such at the moment, because I was obviously numb from the waist down, but I knew I had a long journey ahead from from that day, and it continues.

SPEAKER_01 8:37

Wow, uh yeah, there's parts of that, and I've spent a lot of time with you over the past couple of years up at Apex and in the mountains, and there's parts of that I haven't heard before, and that's sending goosebumps and making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up with that story and and how much you've been through to get to where you are now. Um but keeping keeping there for a moment, you know, what was that what was that moment like when you first realized how serious it was? Is that when you woke up and you thought you didn't know if you were alive or not? And you know, was that when it really sunk in that you're like, okay, I've got a I've got a journey to climb here?

SPEAKER_02 9:15

Um I don't know, there was like stages of it. So I was in hospital for three weeks and it was during COVID, so I only saw my mum once say twice in three weeks. Um and so that first waking up and realizing um, because I think I was still, oh, like I I look like death. If you see some of the pictures, I look like horrendous. My eyes just look black, almost look soulless. Um, my skin's dry, my face is puffed up from all the fluid. Um, and I I think the first one to three days I was pretty much in shock, heavily um dosed up with painkillers. There was a shift when so I had an epidural in place um after as well. And I think something happened where it either it slipped or moved, and it wasn't putting the painkiller into the area, so I had like breakthrough bouts of pain, and that was like the worst pain um I've ever felt, yeah, up there. And because of the time it happened, it was a night shift, and and obviously the hospital staff is is lesser in the evening, therefore they're free, really busy unit. So I think at that moment I was like, ah, okay, this is different to the surgery I had in 2018. This is like serious. Like my leg was twice the size, swollen, my abdomen was swollen, the incision goes from like the top of my pelvis to my groin, just under my testicles, around all the way around you you glue. So it's a huge wound. I think that was the moment when I actually had a dose of the pain that I was brought back to reality, thinking, okay, this is going to be a long, a long journey. And the fact that I couldn't move, I was I was turned. Three people have to turn me to check for bed wounds, etc., like in a synchronized fashion. So my body wasn't twisting, and this again is just reminding me. Someone did that, and the one person was slightly delayed, and my hip cracked, and I was screamed out in agony. So then I had to go and get an X-rayed, had it checked. Um, so I had a pretty rough actually reflecting on it. I had a pretty rough three weeks in hospital. Lots of things, some people's attention to care could have been a little bit better. Um, and there was lots of reasons, and we actually had to make a complaint, um, and I don't very do this, but just to bring awareness to the hospital that things needed to change. Luckily, I was kind of young, resilient, um, strong going into this, so I could bounce back from these things. But if it was a say someone slightly older, maybe not as not as physically strong, there was a lot that could have then like broke a person down, and it was close. I hit rock bottom a fair few times in there, and uh like a this is no disrespect to the hospital, Royal Orthopedic Hospital, like huge respect. I've been in and out of there, but things happen, people are in there, and people make mistakes accidentally. Um, and that was one of them. I was turned, and yeah, again, just the the realization that the pain was bringing me back to reality. So it was yeah, it was a rough three weeks actually.

SPEAKER_01 12:51

I've never I've never really I've not thought about it too much since Yeah, and you can probably see why it's you you know, those it's it does sound sounds like you've been through it through a lot there and you've overcome it and you've got through it. And you mentioned the word resilience, and I know how physical, physically strong you are, how mentally strong you are. Well, during those three weeks, you know, how did you keep your, you know, was there you said you hit rock bottom a couple of times, but then how were you you know picking yourself up? How what were your kind of your mental tips that you were using just to keep going, to keep going day by day?

SPEAKER_02 13:25

Um I I don't think I was doing anything too conscious at that point. I was trying to read as much as I could. I was still pretty like drugged up, dosed up, but yeah I I I'd I'd read um books. The the do collection, I'm just looking at the book, were quite good. They were short, easy to digest. I read a few of those, some mindset books. I was luckily in a in a room of my own and it had a window. Um I called it the window of hope, and it had uh a view of a tree. Um and that was something that kind of grounded me. Um and yeah, when times were difficult, because I don't know where the hours went really, because I was in for three weeks, was bedbound for 10 days, didn't take my first step until around seven to ten days. Um, so I think just trying to stay as present, present as I could, not trying to think too much about the future, like will I be able to walk? Um, will I be able to will it get infected? Because if it gets infected, there's a chance that they might have to remove the metalwork, which means removing my leg. Um so it was it was basically like survive a day, wake up next day, survive a day, next day, and just just take it like that. And the work I did before the surgery, so the training, um get my prep myself prepared mentally, and worst case scenarios helped. Like, if I was to lose a leg, what could I do? So I can could I still do my job? Yes. Could I cycle? At this point, I was um had been into road cycling a little bit because running was hurting my pelvis, cycling was a bit easier. Do people cycle with one leg? And I was looking, and people do cycle with one leg. I was like, well, it can't be it can it can be doable. It's not ideal, but if I was to lose a leg, I've got everything else. I've got two other arms, one other leg, I've got my mind, like my leg doesn't define me. But whereas if you'd asked me 10 years ago, my physical physique defined me. Why did I go to the gym? Not for function, for strength, so I can lift my son and walk, it was to look good, to impress other people. Um, because at that point I was quite lost. Um yeah, lost, feeling lack of self-confidence outwardly. Yeah, life of the party, this guy has it all happy, but unconsciously I was not happy. And then as you do work, self-awareness, that that was the shift. So losing a leg at that point, yeah, I can I could get on with that. Whereas if you'd asked me in 2018 on the surgery, I would have said, Oh, I just if I've lost a leg, there's no point being here. That the mindset was extremely different from 2018 to 2022. I didn't document, talk about 2018, I shut everyone out in 2018 other than one person, didn't communicate, didn't express my emotions. Um, I was going through a breakup at the time, who she'd been extremely supportive. So I was almost isolating and self-sabotaging myself in 2018.

SPEAKER_01 16:36

And I want to I want to go back to 2018, but first close the loop on one of the things you've just said, is that you were kind of preparing to come out with one leg, and that's extraordinary. You know, I guess but did that help you in that moment? You you know, you're preparing to for the worst case scenario did that help in that moment then?

SPEAKER_02 16:56

I think I think it's important to do that, and you can do it through a interesting uh uh a positive lens. As like things go wrong. I don't know what the there's a strategy, a business strategy the way people do this, they launch a project, what would be the worst case scenario if they didn't sell X amount or the idea didn't take. So I wasn't doing it through like if you did it through maybe a negative lens, possibly it wouldn't be good for you. But I was just being realistic, like hey, worst case is I die. I've got not too much to do about that. Maybe get some affairs in order, which I would I did just in case. And then second one, I thought worst case would be maybe infection and leg beam removed, and then they kind of tailed off like that. So it helped me knowing that I had a plan. So if it did happen, I didn't have to make a plan in survival mode. Like, okay, what could I do? Um, and I know what I would have done. I would have got back in the gym and I would have done single leg curls, leg extensions, I would have done upper body, and I would have figured out figured out a way of navigating life. But I don't think I would have had that capacity if I just woke up and they said, Oh, you've got to lose your leg. And then the first thought when you're in that. So it was just like a strategic plan. And it's done me a favor now because we can talk about this separately, but the reoccurrence, the reason why we're not doing surgery on it in a rush is if the metalwork gets infected, the same applies, like the they might have to take the metalwork out. So that's um like that is the one of the biggest risks with that. But yeah, we can 2018, we can touch upon that.

SPEAKER_01 18:38

Yeah, so let's go to 2018. Let's go to who Nathan was before all of this. You mentioned that first surgery, you mentioned a bit of uh you know, you like to party, and it's probably a good thing we didn't know each other then because it's probably a similar kind of story that that we were on. Very uh masculine, cared about my identity, my body, my image. Um, and it sounds quite familiar to what you you touched on there.

SPEAKER_02 19:04

Yeah, so like 2018 was probably like the tail end of this self-sabotaging era from I maybe I oblivious to life up until maybe the age of 16, 17. Uh, had some childhood stuff that happened, but was fairly innocent. I'd say 17, 18, went to college, started playing basketball, met some really good friends, which are still extremely close friends now. Started drinking more, um, partying. Um girls were more interested in me then than they were at school. I don't think I'd had a proper girlfriend up to 17, 18. Um, so it was all new, exciting, and it was all external, like and and feeding something inside that I didn't know needed feeding, which probably was my ego. Um, because I did feel lost, disconnected, empty. I'd had no male, male role model. My father left at a young age. I didn't really know what it was to navigate life gracefully with like humility. Um, had an amazing mum bringing me up. Um, and I thank her for everything. Without her, I wouldn't be where I am today.

SPEAKER_01 20:17

And your mum's amazing. I've met her a couple of times. She is a legend.

SPEAKER_02 20:21

She is made. Yeah, she is a legend, and obviously, looking back at you in hindsight, you can appreciate more at this age. I think that's just part of growing up and being a child. But it's despite that, I think we need a masculine and feminine energy, whether that's from a man, a woman, two women, two men, whatever the the energy is different and it's not good, it's not bad, it's not toxic. Like, and it's it's it's what I lacked. So then you start playing basketball, start going to the gym, test your testosterone is probably flying around a bit more. Um, girls are interested in me, interested in me. So then this external environment starts fueling my happiness, basically. There's no moments of stillness at this point in my life. It's very much go, go, go, go, go, which at that point I didn't think was a bad thing. Um, as I got older, it carried on. It probably got a little bit worse, more drinking. Mum had some health issues. Um, when I was maybe early 20s, she had breast cancer, went, turned to drink. Um, more so, still playing sport, still kind of trying to navigate life. Um, and then there was a moment after Mum recovered. I was doing a sports science degree, I was in my second year, failing miserably. And I thought, well, what am I gonna do with my life? There was something that stopped me, and I thought, okay, chiropractic sounds like a good profession. I've been seeing a chiropractor applied, but they said that. Needed A's at A levels. I needed a 2-1 or a first. So I'd got C's and D's at A level because I was too busy drinking, basketball, chasing women. Yeah. And then sports science. I was failing. Some of my own faults, some obviously my mum being poorly was out of my control, but it was in my control to do what I could do. So I was like failing. So I needed to get from a fail to a two-one in my final year to even be accepted. So I went for the interview. I think I interviewed really well. And then got my results, and I was 1% off a 2-1. So I got a 2-2. And I had to ring them up and say, bring the college and a university and say, oh, I got a 2-2. So I did, but long story short, I got on, got in and passed. Failed one exam in four years. And I think I had 150 exams or something. So I turned. So in that moment where I had realized something needed to change, that was that was pivotal because I it could have gone the other way. I had a drive, I had something that I needed to work for, and then I it was something that I was meant to do, chiropractic. I'm not a huge academic, but if I put the work in, I can do it. And yeah, I graduated in 2012. At this point through uni, I think that four years, I was fairly happy, I think. If I reflect back, I was talking to my friend who I studied with, and there was less care. I hadn't had any serious health issues at this point. Um, I was studying something I loved in Bournemouth, an area that is an amazing place to study, surrounded by good people. And then I went to London, worked for a year, and at the end of that year, 2013, I started to get um a bit of groin pain. I'd started training for 10Ks, and I'd started to play a bit more basketball again. Had some rehab, saw a chiropractor, saw a physio, kept kept coming back. So that was the start of that. A year after graduating, the tumour then came. So the whole time I've been a chiropractor, really, since 2013, this tumour at some point has been there in the background. But that surgery was very minor. Sorry. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:27

No, I just wanted to tie the bow on on that. What was that defining moment that made you shift from Nathan, who was a bit of a party animal, like to drink, but then that moment where you had to look in yourself in the mirror and change, you know, was there any big defining moment? Or was it just actually you woke up one day and actually I need to get on the straight here a little bit?

SPEAKER_02 24:47

Well, that wasn't actually the that was just the defining moment to realize I needed to find a proper job.

SPEAKER_01 24:53

Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_02 24:54

The the real partying started from 2013 to 204 from 2013, 2014.

SPEAKER_01 25:01

When you found when you realized you had a tumor?

SPEAKER_02 25:04

Uh it kind of it was in that year leading up to the tumour.

SPEAKER_01 25:08

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 25:09

Had the tumour, it was only a size of a squash ball, was in hospital for a few hours, like I think it was maybe a day or two days, removed it, within two, three, four weeks, I was back to normal life. That door was closed, okay, carried on with like working, working long hours, um, drinking, not sleeping enough, like all unnecessary stresses.

SPEAKER_03 25:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:32

Um, and it carried on, really. And then, with no surprise, it came back in 2016. So three years later, nothing changed in my life. It probably maybe got a bit worse, more emotional stress. Again, starting to feel less happy in myself, but more aware of it, feeling less less calm, very different to that period in Bournemouth where I said life was pretty good other than exams and and maybe a bit of financial stress. But the fact that it came back was no shock. Like nothing had changed. I hadn't changed my lifestyle, my diet, my mindset, my emotional health. And then 2016 to 2018 was probably my biggest self-destruct moment, as in like really unhealthy habits, like not sleeping, too much drink, um, maybe dabbling in some bits and pieces just to like feel a different state to what I want now, and to get that external validation. So going out, going partying, going raving, because it was something I was good at. It was something that people would come and talk to me. I'd get lots of attention, male, female. It didn't matter what the attention was, reflecting back, but people were interested in me, talking to me. And then 2018 was the time that I realized um something needed to change. I didn't really implement, but I thought if I want to be here for a long time, something needs to change. And that was 2018, rolling into COVID 2019, and then it's probably been from 2019-2020 to now has been the real work. The biggest shift. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:22

So was it? Do you think it was a sense of escapism, or was it more an identity or or a or a bit of both?

SPEAKER_02 27:31

Good question. Um, a bit of both. I think I didn't know who I was. Yeah. Um, I had no idea who I was. I was um trying to be something that I thought by what I'd what I was seeing in my environment. Um, like uh, I wouldn't say I had particularly romantic, but what other guys were doing or what were they wearing, what were they looking like. Um that was yeah, so I was I was unsure, I was lacking confidence, I felt a bit like an imposter syndrome. Um, even in my profession, even not now, but even in that moment in my profession, I think I was not thinking I was good enough. Um, and that stems to lots of things. Probably a big part of is obviously being abandoned by your half your DNA, your dad, that subconsciously must leave a huge mark on your body of feeling safe, accepted. Um, and I never really felt accepted. I always wanted to people please and be liked. And I remember when I was like 10, I had a best friend, and I always used to ask him, Are we best friends? Are we best friends? And that's sad, like for a for a 10-year-old to do that. And I remember it vividly. I was talking about the other day actually, I hadn't remembered, but you know when things just flash in from like 10 years, 15 years ago. And I would be so sad if that was like my son doing that for something that I could have maybe prevented, like if it was from me leaving, and then as a result of that, he grows up to be this sad, lonely, insecure person who doesn't know who he is. And I think yeah, I really didn't know who I was.

SPEAKER_01 29:24

Yeah, and yeah, you know, I can relate to that. I've had a I guess my journey was eight years on steroids, but it was completely, it was, I think it was an identity thing, quite quite similar. You know, it was just feeling very, very, very lost, maybe. I really enjoyed the the external validation, the way I looked, the way I felt, but really it was so hollow, there was nothing to it. Um, so I can kind of relate to that. So let's go to kind of moving up and down here slightly, but 2018, you're going into your first surgery, and it and was that at the point where you were diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at that point as well?

SPEAKER_02 30:08

Yeah, so the surgery for 2018 was October, and then I got diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and bank holiday August 2018. Um, so a month before, and it was a month after that, so I had another biopsy in preparation for the surgery, and it was after that biopsy, within the next month, I started to develop um diabetes basically. Um, I lost loads of weight because I was weighing lots, but put some of the symptoms of diagnosis. Um, when you get diagnosed with diabetes, you start to lose a lot of weight. You're burning a lot of um sugar and fat because your body almost goes into ketosis. And I lost like I think nearly eight kilos in a month. And everyone thought I had cancer at this point. They thought the tumor had changed and it had changed from a benign to cancer. Like I looked horrendous. Um, I didn't have much weight to lose uh back then, or even now, but and then uh um yeah, it was the maybe the stress, maybe the emotional stress of everything, the chemical stress of the gemal anesthetic, I'd had quite a lot in in that period of time. And for whatever reason, my my pancreas, my body attacked my pancreas, um, destroyed the cells that produce insulin, and then yeah, um, my body started to produce diabetic symptoms, and yeah, I got got on then I had to get on top of that within a month to have the surgery. So there was it's taken me a long time to get to grips and accept that side of things because it was okay, type 1 diabetes, okay, surgery, and then yeah, back on with back on with life.

SPEAKER_01 32:03

Yeah, so you've had a lot going on, and and and at that point where you've where you've been kind of diagnosed with the type 1 diabetes, what did that do to you mentally at that point?

SPEAKER_02 32:14

Oh, it was I don't think I understood how much of an impact that was going to have on my life, and it still does now. It's only probably the past year or two that I've accepted more, and as a result of that, I've been able to come up with better management plans and factor it in and bounce back from the times when it's when you're it's not playing ball because it's like a huge, I guess you can look at it as an a like two sides of the coin, it's a burden, but it's also it brings you so much awareness to the body. Obviously, I'd rather not have it if I had a choice, but it's uh yeah, it's it's a difficult one because one, not many people really know it unless you've got it. So when you're talking to people, which doesn't really matter, but it's there's a stigma around it, or people think it's this, but it's not most normal people. Wouldn't why would you? Like I didn't know anything. Well, I did a bit because of my studies, but I had no idea what it was. So then you get the frustration of talking to people. I've got oh, I've got this, I've got that, or not so much now, but when I first had it, it was my conversations I didn't like talking about it as much. But it's uh for a long time I I wish that I never had it, but now I've accepted I've got it, and you've just got to have to to deal with it because at the moment I've got it, and yeah, it's uh and I guess that's a a big part of it.

SPEAKER_01 33:43

Is it is is is it accepting and that can help help move forward with things. How do you how do you rebuild trust with your own body? Because you said you uh you have to have so much self-awareness with your body, and I find it an interesting uh topic is you know how you build trust with your own body and how you become so self-aware.

SPEAKER_02 34:07

Yeah, it's like doing that inner work, yeah. And and what I mean by that is like bringing your attention inward, and when we're in survival mode, which I have been most of my life, hence all the issues, because when your body's in survival mode, you haven't got the energy to express health. It's getting ready to fight, flight, freeze, and then your body breaks down. My body's a perfect example of that. So it's doing the opposite to that and creating calm, stillness, and it's focusing your attention and inward and really feeling feeling we're so in our heads. I think I was talking to a client the other day, and we're so analytical in our thought processes. Um, we're so in thinking mode, attention out, whether it's planning a podcast, planning what you're gonna do with the family, planning work, that when you're in that state, we have no awareness like at all. And meditation has been a huge thing for me. Um, journaling, but that's one thing I find difficult. It's something that doesn't stick, it's helpful, but for me, it's I don't know what it what it is. I'm still trying to figure that out, but more it's that meditation, like some techniques to bring coherence within the body between the heart and the brain, and just having moments of that are have been essential. And and and being out in nature as well is is something that has really helped with my awareness and perspective shift.

SPEAKER_01 35:36

Yeah, it's so true, isn't it? And what does I'm I'm the same with journaling, actually, it's just something that's never stuck. I don't know what it is, you know. Like I'm I'm trying as much as I can and I I dip in and out of it, but yeah, I don't know if it's uh and we're working with Combat Journal, and their journal is incredible, and now that is um yeah, I'm starting getting into it, but yeah, just something that doesn't stick for some reason. Um you're you come across, and I know you as such a resilient guy. What does what does resilience look like for an ordinary day for you? So not talking about kind of a surgery day, but just your day today. How do you build resilience into what you're doing now?

SPEAKER_02 36:18

Well, every day is a test of resilience because type one diabetic, we have over more than 600 or 600 extra decisions to make a day than someone that doesn't. So I've given myself a bit more grace with that because like an extra 600 decisions is is pretty hefty. So my energy management's extremely important to help with resilience, and that'd be guarding my my self-care routine to an extent. Obviously, having a level of an adaption, as you know, with with children, and you've got a few more than me. Um, you have to be adaptable. And it's taken me, what he's nearly two. It's taken me a while to to do that because if I didn't do XYZ, my day's then not set up, and that isn't life. And then the practice has become stressful in itself. So protecting my self-care routine as much as I can, and for me, like morning is essential, evening's essential. Um, and morning would be like some kind of prayer and meditation, ideally, like 45 minutes to an hour meditation. So it depends on me protecting my bedtime, not going to bed too late, especially if my partner doesn't want to go to bed late, and so I can get up early. So that is how the foundation of my resilience um is cultivated, and it's been rough. So I had a biopsy like last April. So this was before the Ultra Challenge, and I think it was before it would have been before Apex just so last year my preparation for those two challenges was like every day was a battle mentally. One because I was in pain for two months after the biopsy, so April, May, June. Then I had a month to train for a 34 mila, which I did um in 14 hours. Wow. And then and then we had apex.

SPEAKER_01 38:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:14

So I feel like maybe from April to now, my life's been pretty turbulent more than more than previous years, but at the same time, I've had more calm and transformation in this time. It's crazy. I just saying it out loud like that. Like it's been crazy with the news, with the biopsy, with the pain, with quite a lot of pain, actually. And every step I take, normally I feel it. My leg's not the same, it's adapted well, muscles have adapted, it's changed. But every single step I do on and off the mountain, on around the house, my normal steps, I feel it every day. Sometimes worse than others. But this year has been particular, particularly difficult and uncomfortable in this side. Um, so that in itself is just having to bring you back to to cultivate resilience, the unknown how long it's going to last for. What can I do with this level of pain? I can still go to the gym and do XYZ. So it's been a real lesson of adaptation. And again, being in the present moment, not letting my head run away with the future. That's not to say you shouldn't plan for the future, it's important. But I think just being in that present moment helps with resilience as well, actually.

SPEAKER_01 39:33

It's so true, and a hard thing to do in the world we live in is to stay completely present, especially with I I read somewhere the other day that is it 35,000 decisions we have to make a day, roughly. Like might be a good idea. I think so.

SPEAKER_02 39:50

Yeah, yeah. I know we have about 70,000 thoughts a day.

SPEAKER_01 39:54

Is that what it is? Wow, it's just incredible, isn't it? That you know, no wonder why we are all just living in this chaotic kind of busy world, and and then you know, speaking to guys like yourself who actually really doing the work that a lot of people, including myself, that don't do enough of.

SPEAKER_02 40:12

No, but I think this every e every person's different, every circumstance is different, like it's it's this difficult. It's easy to compare ourselves to others, but we're all doing the best. Obviously, some of us aren't, but I think your, you, me, people in this circle are doing the best that they can with the circumstances that they're in. We can always do more, we can always do less. For me, uh it's a necessity and it's essential for me to do this work, I think. Um, if I didn't, I might not be here now um speaking to you. That's like the level that this work has impacted me. Um, I think.

SPEAKER_01 40:56

How much of it is spiritual?

SPEAKER_02 40:59

Um, I've always believed in a higher power. Um, in chiropractic, we call it universal intelligence. I I believe that there's too much order for it to be random. I feel like it was created. So for it to be created, there has to be creator, whatever that looks like. So I've always believed, well, quantum physics, energy is energy. Like since the existence of the universe, none leaves, and there's no extra. It's it changes form, but energy. So obviously, Wi-Fi. People don't believe when we talk, but when I talk like this, people don't energy. We've got Wi-Fi, we've got Bluetooth, we've got you can call someone from one side of the world to the other. Like things can travel, you can't see. Energy, we're energy, we're vibrating at a slower rate than other things. So I've always believed in that. And then when I had that near-death experience in 2022, I surrendered to something that was bigger than me in that moment, and I felt peace and I felt ease. And that's one thing that helped me through the hospital, having faith in the bigger picture, that this isn't it, basically. And like I say, if if if energy it's never goes and never it goes somewhere, and uh yeah, so faith is important, and it and it just gives me a lot of peace and ease with day-to-day life, knowing that I can do everything that I can, but part of it is out of my my control, and I'm happy, I'm happy with that.

SPEAKER_01 42:38

And that's played a big part in your some of the darkest moments, is it? You know, you can lean into that, you can really touch on that.

SPEAKER_02 42:46

Surrendering to it definitely and and letting go. Um especially this past month or two, with with the news of this recurrent reoccurrence growing. I have really lent into that. That I'm okay, if I decide not to have the surgery, it grows, and I have to have the surgery at a later day, or it's out of my hands, and actually the surgery needs to be done now because if not, it's going to cause serious implications. If it works, it works. If it doesn't, it doesn't. If I lose my leg, I lose my leg. If I don't, I don't. If I die, I die. If I don't, I don't. I I'm doing all that I can to be the best version of myself for me, for my family, particularly for my son, that he can look up to me now and in the future, see things like this, see everything that I do, and he can go, That was my dad. What a legend. I want to be like him. Minus all the health issues.

SPEAKER_01 43:48

One hundred percent though. I c yeah, you are a legend, Nathan. What you're doing, the work you're doing is is really inspiring. And, you know, it I g I get annoyed with myself for not talking to you more, you know, like this just Love these conversations. I want to see more of you, Nathan. Um, no, you're such a great guy, and your song will certainly be gone by the coach. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. If someone uh listening right now is feeling overwhelmed and their feeling is all a little bit too much, what's the first thing that they should focus on? Or what's that one bit of advice you would give them?

SPEAKER_02 44:22

I think just keep things simple because the reason why we struggle with overwhelm and stress is we're already thinking about too much, is just to bring it back to trying to get out of the head into the body, and something that you do is just to be still, no distractions, eyes closed, so you're removing any external cues. If you've got some sound sound cancelling headphones, you can even put those on, but just breathe, breathe into the chest area, five seconds in, five seconds out, just to create change within the nervous system to change your your state. And it's the change in state that helps with change in stress, anxiety, overwhelm because your body in that state is in that fight or flight mode. So it's all about changing state. And one thing that is essential for me and for lots of people that I've heard is we all have these bad moments, but it's how quickly you can change your state. Does the news of the tumor coming back affect me? Of course it does. Did I feel like absolute rubbish? Yes. Uh I said some pretty dark things in that first 12 to 24 hours a month ago to my friend on the phone, and he messaged about saying, Oh, are you okay? I was like, Yeah, I'll be fine. I just needed to vent, and I haven't vented like that for a while, but we have to express our emotions. That's one thing I've learned. It's not about being stoic all the time, like, yeah, I'm fine. But then I changed my state pretty quick. 24 hours, I was I was back to my baseline. So we will always dip, we'll always be here. Sometimes we'll be here, sometimes we'll be here, but it's how quickly we can change the state that is essential to navigate life. And that's probably one of the biggest things. I know you didn't ask that question, but no changing your state in the moment, keep things simple, remove distractions, focus on yourself, focus on your breath. And then I would always go for a walk, like just go out and move, move your body, move the energy, and then see how you're feeling. Has it changed? Has it not?

SPEAKER_01 46:30

Love that, and and I love the depth that you've gone into that because there are so many, and just thinking while you're talking, then that there is so many different uh moments in a day where your state can change, or where you need to your state to change to get back to that baseline. Whether you're just 10 minutes with the kids and they're playing up, they're not getting their school uniform on in the mornings, or you know, you've had a stressful day at work, you get and you're about to walk into the front door. How can you change that state to then be fully present to go home to take yourself out of that work environment? So it's it's so true. I love the detail you're in and the depth that you that you go to to do the work you're doing. You've spoken a lot about uh your son being a huge motivation. Um, and I've met him. What a cute little legend he is as well. Um, how has becoming a father changed the way you face adversity?

SPEAKER_02 47:26

Um it's made me make sure that I am navigating it with grace, humility, um, with integrity, saying what I'm gonna do if I make mistakes, hold my hands up, be accountable. And it's just made me put things in perspective. Like these little babies that we have are so innocent and they are so dependent on us, how we show up, not just what we say by what we do, but how we feel, like the energy. And at this age, up to seven years old, they're like sponges subconsciously. Like, how does dad talk to mum? How does he why is he acting like that? How does he deal with news? As maybe he gets a bit older, like three, four, five. If I get this news about the tumor and I'd gone off the rails or became snappy, or these are all things that that he will pick up on. And at the moment, it's more does he feel safe, does he feel loved? Um, and to do that, you have to be present, you have to be able to listen to what they're saying, their body language. So that's another thing that it's really brought me in the present moment having him and just enjoying that moment, but really like we can all say, Oh, let's be present, let's be grateful, and we like chop things down on a grateful diary. Do we really mean it? We're just going through the motions with him. I've really felt it. Um, especially with the news that we've had recently, the ongoing issues that I've had, like obviously it's been in my lungs for a while, that's stable. But those moments are precious, and they're the moments that I would remember lying on my deathbed would be the weight he is when I hold him, what his hair smells like, what his breath smells like in the morning or in the middle of the night. They're the things that bring me back into this moment, but also inspire me to be the best version of myself. Do everything that I can to be here for as long as I can, leaving a trail of things to do to navigate life. And I think we all need that. I didn't have that. God willing, I'm here so I can see him be my age, so we can have discussions, but it might not happen realistically, who knows? But if he if I'm not there in the physical, I need him to hear me speak, I need him to see me do challenges, push myself. Um, so that's one reason why I do want things like this and do videos which I haven't done for a while. This is hopefully gonna kickstart me. I've been procrastinating too much, overthinking about what to say, what to do. But I want to leave a catalogue for him, for me, it's therapeutic to talk for anyone else as well that wants to see this and get something from me, but it's to be a a role model and what it is to be a man, I think. Um, and that's strengths, weaknesses, vulnerability, flaws, everything.

SPEAKER_01 50:37

Yeah, amazing. And it sounds like you're doing all the all the right things by that. And I was gonna ask how do you show your son's strength without pretending life isn't hard, but I guess it is from the challenges you're doing and the videos you want to get back to doing, and it's all of those little things that uh that can add up, and he can see that later on in life and be like, Yeah, you know what it was my dad, he did all that.

SPEAKER_02 51:05

Yeah, it's um just to be just to be present and be authentic and to know myself, which I am I I feel like I'm getting there. Um I think it's a lifelong journey for us for us all, especially in the life and the world that we're in. It's um comparisons easy, imposter syndrome is is there. There's like I'm my what my own worst critic trying to chase progress rather than perfection, but all these things um just to be authentic and to be human.

SPEAKER_01 51:50

Yeah, I think. I love that, and I think I think everyone has has a sense of that though, isn't it? Because you know, touching on that perfection thing, it's really hard. Like I'm the same. I try I I I have this tendency to like not do something because it won't be perfect. And it's something I'm working on now, is like just pro just progress, just take a step forward, just keep going. Um, it doesn't need to be perfect, and I think that could probably stems from I had to have the perfect body back in uh 2012, and that's why I started taking steroids. I had to have a ridiculous six pack, and you know, and for what? You know what I mean? It's uh it's mad. It would be uh understandable, I guess, you know, if someone in your position and where you are now chose comfort. We spoke about choosing comfort uh or choosing discomfort over comfort. And you're taking on a uh and you're choosing, let's say, you're choosing to take on a 75 kilometer, is it run hike in July?

SPEAKER_02 52:54

So it's you can either run, hike, walk, given my like pelvis and stuff. I haven't ran for a good decade. Maybe the odd jog on it and Hell Vellum when I was doing Apex, but nothing uh nothing consistently. So my plan is to walk it um probably at two and a half, three kilometres an hour. Should be done within 24 hours, yeah. So I'm gonna be walking it.

SPEAKER_01 53:18

Amazing. And are you doing it for a charity? Yeah, I'm doing it for sarcoma, um, which is on the t-shirt.

SPEAKER_02 53:28

You can see it. Lovely. Um sarcoma UK, because so my tumors are chondroblastoma, but my um all the care that would have received scans, bloods, and all the specialist care at Royal Orthopedic Hospital in Birmingham, um, it would be under the same umbrella as sarcoma. So sarcoma is for um bone and soft tissue tumors, this being a bone tumor. And I thought it's yeah, it felt right. I've been doing the apex and the challenge for myself more so, but for my legacy, like we just mentioned for my son, I want to try and bring more awareness and help more people with the challenges I'm going through. It would almost be selfish for me to not do this because this is a life-changing surgery, and a fair few people have reached out to me and with beautiful messages saying, like, how have you done this? What have you done? Um, you've been inspiring. So if I can reach people that are going through something similar, just to give them a bit of hope that okay, it's it's tough, like no one prepares you for what is going to happen. Like, that's what people say. People feel don't feel validated when because people don't know the depth of the surgery until you've had it. So to show that, okay, four years later, even though I've done some challenges before, four four years later, there is a possibility that you could walk 75 kilometers. Um, so it's to raise money, but also raise awareness of what's possible. And that relates to all health issues, so not just this. There's a whole host of host, a whole host of health issues that people can look at me and say, okay, might not be this, but it might be something else. The same applies. So yeah, that's uh that's the plan. And I think I'll do it. It's it's uh it'll be tough. It'll be the furthest I've ever walked, even prior to surgery, like my whole life. The furthest I've ever walked is 34 miles, and that was last year. Yeah, so all this I'm doing was after surgery. I'd never walked any further than 15 to 20 miles prior to surgery. Post surgery, I did 30 odd miles first Apex, yeah, 34 miles doing this challenge last year, and then Apex just gone. I think I did about 30 miles.

SPEAKER_01 55:50

Amazing. And you know, going back to that, we touched on it earlier. You were told what you could never walk again, and then or you and then but you had this idea that you wanted to go and climb climb Everest but to get to base camp, and and look at the journey you've come to know, it's just incredible.

SPEAKER_02 56:07

Yeah, yeah, it was um you might be able to walk again, maybe with sticks aided, you might have a limp. Wow, and but you're not gonna be able to climb Everest. And uh in that moment I didn't really think too much, but three weeks after when I left um hospital, I was lying there, and I thought I sent put a post on Instagram saying, uh yeah, I'm gonna attempt Basecamp Everest at some point. So, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 56:32

Nice, and what does long distance walking or long dist long distance endurance events, what does that teach you about the mind? Or what has it taught you about your mind?

SPEAKER_02 56:42

That we've always got more to give, but it's quite meditative, and you you unlock like certain parts of you, it's a time to think, it's a time to process. You're walking on your own for 24 hours through day and night, head torch, just there. It brings everything in perspective, it brings everything into that moment. Going back to all the distractions and overwhelm that we have, you haven't got time to be thinking about XYZ when you've been walking for 10, 12, 14 hours. It's painful every walk, my hips hurting, I'm trying to deal with my blood sugar, my blood sugar's going low. I have no other, it's in this moment now. So it brings you into that present moment, and and that's all we truly have. Like all we have is that present moment. We don't have 10 minutes, 20 minutes, like anything could happen in this period of time. So even though it's extremely difficult, and most like I say, every step I have is uncomfortable. And I remember when I did the 50k um category last year, the last 15 kilometers was I was limping for 15 kilometers basically, and it's not easy, and but it hardened it, it doesn't harden the mind, but it armors the mind, I think, and just lets you know that you can do more in ordinary situations, and it's almost like the cookie jar thing that everyone says with um Goggins okay, if I can walk 75 kilometers after all that I've been through, I can do XYZ in my everyday life. It makes things a little bit easier, and I might not be here next year. So I want to do this, show that it's possible for other people, for my son, that things are possible. No matter what you've been through, you can always level up. Whatever that level up like looks like for you, for me, it's different again, it's not about comparison, and I find that difficult when I'm around athletes, I'm around people that are nailing Helvelin, doing good times. I'm like, I I get frustrated thinking like what could I have done having two able legs? But obviously, regret isn't isn't isn't ideal, but then I think my mindset wouldn't be where I am now if I'd sailed through life to 38, 39. So it's kind of pros and cons.

SPEAKER_01 59:22

Yeah, it's interesting because that's probably something that people don't don't realise, like they don't think about you know, it put put themselves in your situation, it's probably that not something that would that we would do, and that's I guess that is hard for you because you're seeing these people go up and down nine times or whatever it is, and um and it must be frustrating. I can I I get that, and it's but then you've got such powerful tools in your toolkit to bring you back into being present, um, you know, and that self-awareness and how strong your mind is. Do you do you have to dig into your why a lot and on these endurance challenges you're doing right now, or what you've done?

SPEAKER_02 1:00:05

Um I don't think so as much as others. Um there is a like an aspect that you should, do you know you're here? Like, what's your why? It pushes you in your darkest moments. I think it does sometimes, but I think when you're so present in that moment, it's literally just one step after the other. I'm doing it because I set the challenge, I want to push myself. Um maybe more so in this this one. I'm like saying it's it's it's bigger than me. The other ones were about me. These are yes, about me. I'm doing it because I want to. Um, but also some other people that are struggling with with health issues, it's so it's bigger than me. So I think in this moment, knowing that people have invested supported um financial support or other support towards this, that will probably keep me going. Like these people are walking behind me. Um, and I hopefully I'm gonna have because you can't do stuff alone as well. And what I've realized in with Last Apex is I can plan lots of stuff, but given my circumstance, it's difficult to do stuff like because I've got to worry about blood sugar, I've got to worry about carrying extra water, extra bits. This can change at any moment, and I have to change how I walk. Or so I'm I'm hoping for this challenge that I've got a bit of a more of a support because you can drive around it, it's in Bakewell in the peaks. So my mum's gonna be there, sister's gonna be there. Just to have like a bit of a more of a maybe support network, like similar to what you had in Apex, you know, so you don't have to think about food or etc. If you're if you're having a bad, bad time, you can speak to someone and they can do the admin of working out what you need. Yeah, whereas what I find when I'm on that mountain, I'm not just walking, I'm not just stepping, I'm thinking of the 600 decisions near enough of blood sugar, fatigue, how's my leg? Like it's and that in itself, maybe is why it's difficult. I got five laps this time, five laps last time. It's I don't know, it's there's a lot of mental fatigue. I experienced maybe again. I'm only reflecting on that now, thinking about that, that I physically feel pretty solid and I recover pretty quick. But the mental fatigue of an endurance event is what I've struggled with. I think not having um, don't get me wrong, the support I've had has been great, like Morris, fantastic, the boys recently. Um, but it's different. It's different when someone's involved to supporting, isn't it? Like you can't be involved and support because you're also involved.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:52

No, it's so true, isn't it? And I think that's one of the lessons I learned is you have to like you mentioned, you have to make so many decisions, and it's how we can give those decisions to somebody else, whether that be the food, the hydration, the kit, you know, because you go to this mental fatigue, you're physically fatigued, and it's how you can reduce the amount of decisions you have to make while taking on these challenges to make it easier. So if there's anything that, you know, Apex are gonna be supporting you anyway as one of your sponsors, and if there's anything else that that we can do or our network can do to support, then you know we'll put some stuff out on socials and please just just reach out because you know maybe we can come up to the event and and support you in in any way we can.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:36

Yeah, that'd be great. Yeah, really appreciate that.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:39

You've um you've lived through things that most of us haven't, to be honest with you, Nathan. And and if someone listening wants to build resilience in their own life, what three things should they start doing tomorrow? Let's look at one mindset shift, one daily habit, and one belief shift.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:00

Well, I think self-awareness is key, like knowing how you feel from a moment-to-moment, day-to-day basis is key. Because without that awareness, you can't create change, and that awareness can be done from like breathing techniques, meditation, journaling. Um, they're the main ones for myself. Habit-wise, do something physical to the best of your ability. Like we are designed to move. If we don't move, it impacts everything. Our mental state, our heart, cardiovascular, immune system, digestion, everything. Whether that just be if you're not doing anything, just go to walking. Um, if you if you've got two two legs that work, walk. Um, but resistance training, I say all my clients, all my patients, it's it's essential to train your muscles. Like you don't have to get massive, and it takes a lot of work, as you know, to get massive. I've been trying to get massive for 39 years. Like people get afraid that they're gonna lift weights and all of a sudden be massive. Like that doesn't work, does it? It's uh I wish, but uh so it's some kind of resistance training, whether that'd be one day a week to start off with two two two days a week, that is essential. Um, and belief would be not to believe everything that you think, and that ties into the awareness. But we mentioned 70,000 thoughts. A lot of them are probably not too positive or or favorable, but even if you're just starting to be aware and catching the thoughts, that in itself lessens the effect that they have on you. Um and and just learning to almost stop as many as you can. It might only be a hundred, but that hundred feels like a huge win. And that's one thing that's been a massive part of my um work. this past maybe six to twelve months is being very aware of my thoughts, not being too judgmental on them. But if I don't like the thought, it's not serving me in the moment, I kind of stop it. And that's not burying my head in the sand, that's not accepting it. It's just there are so many thoughts you have to bet them. If not, like your your life is subconsciously run.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:21

I love that. And peeling a layer back off that, when these thoughts are coming in, how do you stop that? Do you go into that breath work or what is that technique you have to do?

SPEAKER_02 1:06:30

Just say stop.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:32

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:32

Like literally yeah it takes practice like anything. But say if um you're in the shower and you start having a negative thought about like work or the day ahead or something that's happened like rather than let it run, because it runs and it will get momentum then you'll start to think of something else negative, something else negative. I just go okay stop and and then and then just move on like carry on washing my body if I'm in the shower or and just do something else. But you can yeah you can sometimes do that if you've got a bit more time but if you're in the moment driving to work driving back from work just being aware of it okay it's a thought I don't necessarily have to believe it. You can if you want but in that moment is it going to serve you are you going to feel is your state going to benefit from you believing that thought sometimes it does if I'm walking down the road I'm feeling good I'm feeling fit yeah I'm I am yeah great um and from a without feeling because people think oh they can't beat themselves up I used to think that it's a bit egotistical a bit overconfident a bit arrogant but if you can't appreciate the good things that you do no one else can so it's important. Yeah I love that stop is what I'm gonna use when those thoughts come into my stop you can say out loud like you can say it out loud and just stop and and it really works it it might feel a bit weird at first talking to yourself but talk to myself all the time so it's nothing uh nothing too unusual for me but it really does work just just being aware of the thoughts and like I said if there's so many you have to bet them like you can't get you can't let them just go um it's so true.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:11

I asked this question uh at the end of each episode to every guest because it's it sits at the heart of this podcast right now in the season of your life what does rising to your Everest mean to you to be a little bit better each day like for myself for anyone I come in contact with that the interaction that they have from me is sincere it's done with grace humility compassion and integrity and people remember how you make them feel I I read this somewhere not with all the things that you've got and that directly links to my son I want him to remember how I made him feel because he's not going to remember what's happened he's only two but his nervous system will remember how I made him feel which is I want him to be safe loved unconditionally and know that as who he is nothing needs to change so true so true I love that where can people find you and support you we'll put all this into the into the show comments at the end but what are the handles where where are you most active at the moment?

SPEAKER_02 1:09:27

Just Instagram really which is at NJ Chilton um and if people do want to support the uh the charity event in July the links in my bio just given page so all the money goes directly to the charity um got a target of £5,000 which would be amazing we're at about a thousand pounds at the minute so anything and even if it's just sharing it or sharing the videos doesn't have to be financial support just to bring awareness and reach to to content like this I'd be uh much appreciated and extremely grateful.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:02

Amazing yeah we'll make sure all those all those notes go in and we can push this out as much as we can to try and get you to reach your target and the awareness is what you're is what you're passionate about. Resilience isn't built in one big moment it's built breath by breath step by step whatever whatever your Everest is right now keep climbing. Nathan you've been an absolute legend thanks for your time my man absolute pleasure Adam cheers mate cheers all good mate I'll stop it there. Mate thanks a lot for that that was great. No my pleasure appreciate it mate yeah hope you enjoyed it