The Senior Zone
The Senior Zone is the DMV’s #1 weekly radio program dedicated to empowering adults 50+ to live fuller, healthier, and more informed lives — now available on demand as a podcast.
Hosted by Shawn Perry since 2012, The Senior Zone features thoughtful conversations with trusted experts, community leaders, advocates, and everyday people doing extraordinary work in aging, health, finance, caregiving, and purposeful living. From timely resources and consumer protections to inspiration, wisdom, and real talk — this is where experience meets opportunity.
Whether you’re planning your next chapter, supporting a loved one, or simply committed to thriving beyond expectations, The Senior Zone delivers insight, clarity, and encouragement — one meaningful conversation at a time.
🎙️ New episodes weekly
📍 Originally broadcast on WYCB 1340AM (Washington, DC)
The Senior Zone
Ep. 713 | Living With Grace: Betty Entzminger & RamDev Dale Borglum
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
This week on The Senior Zone, Shawn Perry welcomes Ms. District of Columbia Senior America 2026, Betty Entzminger, for a conversation about grace, purpose, confidence, and representation after 50. Then, Dale Borglum, author of How to Live So You Can Die Without Fear, joins the show for a thoughtful conversation about living fully, loving deeply, and finding peace before life’s final chapter.
Thank you for listening and until we meet again…keep your head high, your heart full, and always — be someone who makes someone else look forward to their tomorrow.
Opening Remarks & Weekly Vitamin
SPEAKER_03Welcome to the Senior Zone, where we connect older adults with the organizations and resources that serve them.
SPEAKER_08The Senior Zone's goal is to educate, empower, enlighten, entertain, and engage older adults with the tons of information to stay healthy, happy, and secure.
SPEAKER_03Great guests help notes, upcoming events, and useful information.
SPEAKER_08So get ready to take notes of up.
SPEAKER_03It's now time for the senior zone.
SPEAKER_06Welcome, welcome, welcome, family to the senior zone. I am your host, Sean Perry, and as always, I am grateful to be with you on the DMV's number one weekly radio program serving our 50 plus community. Now, here we are, stepping into the first Monday of July. The cookouts may be winding down, the fireworks may be quiet now, but the bigger question still remains: how are we choosing to live with the freedom we've been given? Because freedom is not just about a holiday. Freedom is about being able to age with dignity. Freedom is being seen, heard, respected, protected, and included. Freedom is having the courage to keep growing, keep loving, keep showing up, and keep writing new chapters no matter what age is attached to your name. And that's the real spirit of this week's show. In segment one, we'll celebrate grace, purpose, and representation right here in the district as we welcome the newly crowned Miss District of Columbia Senior America 2026 Miss Betty Inzminger. Her story reminds us that beauty, service, confidence, and leadership do not retire. And then in segment two, we'll turn toward a deeper conversation about life, peace, and the courage to face what many of us avoid. Dale Borglum, an 83-year-old pioneer in the conscious dying movement and author of How to Live So You Can Die Without Fear, joins us to talk about living fully, loving deeply, and finding peace before the final chapter. And family, remember, the senior zone is also available on demand. So if you missed today's show or if there's a conversation you want to hear again or share with somebody you love, just search the senior zone wherever you listen to podcasts. And now it's time for your weekly vitamin that dose of encouragement for the days ahead. Now, do not let age make you smaller. Let it make you clearer. Clearer about what matters. Clearer about who deserves your energy. Clearer about the peace you're no longer willing to postpone. This week, walk like your story still has power, because it does. Speak like your wisdom still has work to do. And live like Grace is not behind you. Grace is walking right beside you. That was your weekly vitamin. Now, finishing out today's show, we'll have Birthdays of the Week, the new Dear Grave Woman, featuring Joelle Simone, and your later life lowdown with news, resources, and announcements for older adults across the DMV. But before we move forward, I want to send some love and gratitude to our sponsors and partners. Thank you, Legal Counsel for the Elderly, AARP, District of Columbia, AARP of the State of Maryland, Compassion and Choices, Jewish Council for the Aging, Mary's Center, and the DC Department of Aging and Community Living.
Beacon Newspapers Monthly Conversation
SPEAKER_06All right, family, let's keep it moving. If you're someone who likes staying informed, staying inspired, and staying ahead of the curve after 50, then this next conversation is for you. I'm now joined by Margaret Foster, editor of the Beacon Newspapers, and we're diving into their July issue. What's on the cover, what's inside, and what just might change how you move, think, live, and plan your next chapter. Margaret, welcome back to the Senior Zone.
SPEAKER_04Hi, Sean. It's great to be here.
SPEAKER_06It is always great to have you here as my first conversation of every new month. So, Margaret, let's start. Uh, I'm looking at the Beacon newspaper, operating kind of blind here, but you're focusing on the Northern Virginia Senior Olympics. What is that all about?
SPEAKER_04Yes, we have two, we have a brand new paper now. We have a new Northern Virginia edition that we're launching in July. So we will still have our DC Maryland paper that we've had for 35 years. And we are launching a special Northern Virginia edition for all the folks in Virginia. So we have heard over the years that we don't pay enough attention to Virginia. Well, this is their own paper. Um it's gonna share a lot of the content, but it will have its own cover story, its own art stories. Um we're excited about that. That's a that's a big change here at the Beacon. And our inaugural issue is going to be all about the Northern Virginia Senior Olympics. Now, this is cool. You only have to be 50 years old and you pay $20 to for one event or 30 events or however many events that you want to do. And the events range from the you know serious hard ones like pickleball and long jump and really strenuous ones, which are incredible to watch, by the way. Just seeing you know older people like there's a 93-year-old pickleball player who's fantastic. She does the long jump too. I spoke to her, she's such a doll. Um but there's also little events like um Rummy Cube and Sudoku. So if you're not an athlete, you can still participate in the senior Olympics. And we uh explain, you know, how they started in 1982 and who runs them now. It's mostly participants that say, This is so fun that I want to be more involved. How can I help? So it's a really feel it's a feel-good story.
SPEAKER_06Great stuff always from the Beacon News papers. I see your uh cover story is all about rowing and why it can be especially good for older adults. What did you learn from the people that uh that was interviewed?
SPEAKER_04Well, this story is for the DC Maryland edition, and it's all about learning to row, even even at our age. You know, you can pick up a new sport and it's very easy on it's very good for older adults because it's it's a full body workout, but it's kind of easy on the joints. And we spoke to someone who said that it actually cured her chronic pain. And it's a the ultimate team sport, so you do have to kind of concentrate and keep your movements in line with your boatmates. Um, so it's very meditative, like it clears your mind. Um, there's also a new an organization for breast cancer survivors that teaches them to row for free um because the the founder found that it was such a um a healing kind of activity just for her body and her mind.
SPEAKER_06Yeah. Let's switch over to uh the health section. I see you have an article around calcium and how much is too much, etc.
SPEAKER_04Yes. Um, this is a surprising one. I didn't realize that it is possible to take too much calcium. And the good news is if you're taking a calcium supplement, you might not have to. Um it seems like you might be just getting it uh enough calcium. And the the US recommends more calcium than other countries do. So the um the idea is to get the calcium from food if you can and from dairy. Um, because there are some studies that say if you're taking in too much calcium, you might be putting yourself at risk for some kinds of cancer. I didn't know that.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, gotta stay on top of those uh things. Our eyes, that's that's important, right? Our vision. I see you have an article around how to protect our vision.
SPEAKER_04Yes, the National Eye Institute gave us some tips, and I learned a lot from this too. I mean, obviously the big one in summertime, wear your sunglasses, you know, always have those in the car. And I do that now. Um, even on cloudy days, though, um, it's also saying if you eat well, uh, that's a good idea. And one of the good tips too was that you really do need to go see an eye doctor, maybe get your eyes dilated. Everyone hates that. I know I do. Um, but it's a good way to catch problems before they're um too big to solve.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, yeah. Now, my other section, the money section, I always love talking about you know health and wealth. And so I see in your money section, this is about the heart, it seems. Love after 50, you know. Can you talk to us about that article?
SPEAKER_04Yes, we have a new columnist who writes about you know, new love after 50, and it's an advice column. So people write in um with questions and she answers them. She got a question about, hey, I'm I'm dating my boyfriend, I really like him. He kind of wants to get married, and I'm not sure that I want to because this woman was um financial you know situation was destroyed by her ex-husband. So she's wary. Um so we uh we kind of answer the the we calculate the costs of marriage and and um our columnist gives her some advice. So it's interesting.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, yeah. Staying in that money lane, this next article sounds like one that people may want to clip, save, uh, and even share. It's about uh, you know, uh Medicare and and 18 free things out there with with respect to Medicare.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I mean, uh some of these surprise me. Um the annual exam, of course, everyone knows about, but there's a nice handy list there that you can uh, like you said, clip out. It's small enough to clip out and keep and keep in your wallet so that you know it's free.
SPEAKER_06Yeah. And then uh what's what's this next one? It's about senior living at 61. It's a feature story of a 61-year-old who moves into a senior living uh community and becomes the youngest person there.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, this is a great story. Um it's it's about uh someone in in Alexandria who decided he wanted to not worry about the rest of his life. He wanted to just move in now. And um he got on the wait list at Goodwin uh Living and he loves it. He l he says his days are so fun. He, you know, he's around people, he volunteers in the memory care. Um and at first people would say, Are you here for your parents? Do you work here? Um, but he made friends quickly, and it's it's a just a beautiful story. It's a well-written um personal essay about why he did it, and and he says his life is fantastic, he's never been happier.
SPEAKER_06Interesting, interesting. So he's the baby of the bunch in the senior in the senior facility that he's uh living in right now. Well, Margaret, my last question, as always, uh my friend, where can our listeners get their hands, their eyes on the July edition of the Beacon newspaper?
SPEAKER_04Well, we are in most grocery stores and pharmacies. We're in all senior centers and libraries, and we're always online at thebeacon newspapers.com, and you can flip through the paper there.
SPEAKER_06Margaret Foster, editor of the Beacon Newspapers. Thank you, thank you, thank you, uh, my friend, for joining us this July.
SPEAKER_04Thank you so much, Sean.
SPEAKER_06Family, be sure to pick up your edition of the Beacon News Papers all throughout the DMV. Margaret, thank you once again, folks. This first break is brought to you by Legal Counsel for the Elderly, providing free legal and social work services to D.C. residents most in need. We'll be right back.
SPEAKER_00Legal Counsel for the Elderly champions the dignity and rights of DC elders by providing free legal and social work services to those in need. Worried about eviction or foreclosure, need help obtaining social security or veterans benefits? Call Legal Counsel for the Elderly at 202-434-2120. Income eligibility applies. LCE is an affiliate of AARP 202-434-2120.
SPEAKER_07Attention, listeners, criminals are consistently developing new ways to steal your hard-earned money and personal information. But the AARP Fraud Watch Network is here to help you protect yourself and your loved ones. See or report scams in your area with our scam tracking map. Get guidance from our trained fraud specialist, and sign up to receive information on the latest scams. Knowledge is power. If you can spot a scam, you can stop a scam. Get more tips and resources at aarp.org slash fraudwatch network.
Segment 1: Betty Entzminger, Ms Senior DC 2026
SPEAKER_06Welcome back, family, to another inspiring edition of the Senior Zone, where experience speaks and wisdom shines. I'm your host, Sean Perry. Now, if you've been following the pageant scene here in the District of Columbia, then you know there's a new queen in town, and I mean that literally. It is my absolute honor to welcome the newly crowned Miss District of Columbia Senior America 2026, Miss Betty Insminger. Betty, I should say Queen Betty, welcome to the senior zone and congratulations. Thank you very much. Thank you for having me. It is my honor to have you. I want to start at the top, Queen Betty. Can I call you Queen Betty? Absolutely. Thank you very much. All right. So let's start at the top. How does it feel now to carry the title, Miss District of Columbia Senior America 2026?
SPEAKER_10Um, since this happened last month, um, I am still, it feels like I'm asleep and I'm dreaming. So um, but it's been a wonderful, rich experience. Uh it still feels not real. Um, I was um at a place, I guess I was at the giant, and somebody stopped me to say, we saw you, you missed C. So it's um it's wonderful. Thank you for asking.
SPEAKER_06Yeah. Well, I can hear uh uh the joy in your voice, and it is contagious. So again, congratulations. I'm smiling here. So take us back, uh Queen Betty, to that moment they called your name. What was running through your heart and mind at that very exact second?
SPEAKER_10I think that when they called my name, I didn't believe it because I won Miss Congeniality. Um, I won the trophy for the most ads, then I won the trophy for um the the best talent. And I was like, huh, let me see. I I I didn't know what to say or what to do other than to try to move. Um when they called my name, I didn't believe it. And then she said it again, and then I said, Okay, you have to move. So it was one of those moments you hear it, but you don't believe it. You have to hear it again. Um, so it was one of those moments. Um, like when your mother calls you, just come downstairs and you're doing something, you're not gonna go. And when she calls you with that voice, you know you better get downstairs. So I um enjoyed it. It it was it's still not, I don't believe it.
SPEAKER_06So yeah. I've been doing this a number of years uh now, Queen Betty, and I'm excited each and every uh year. And I I'm I'm smiling here. I am happy for you, but I know that moment is a moment that you will never forget, and now one that you will carry for the rest of your life and everywhere uh you go. You know, pageants like like this aren't just about crowns and gowns, they're about purpose, right? Uh what inspired you to participate in the very first place?
SPEAKER_10Um I I I am a native Washingtonian. I am a third-generation uh Washingtonian, and I had briefly moved to Maryland, and then I said when I moved back into DC, my first business would be to enter the pageant. They've been after me for six years, and I said I'm gonna do it. And I did it. It it was to be able to be a part of something that reflects my city, that I'm a name went through DCPS and everything. So I just said that I need to do this. That's all it was for me, just to say I need to do it, complete it, and ready to go home. But the excitement still lives, so I'm grateful that I did it. Um, I didn't have any preconceived notions of why I'm gonna do it, other than my commitment was to run for Miss Senior DC.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, well, I am happy and glad that you had that, how can I word it, that purpose-driven spirit uh to participate. Whether you were in Maryland and DC, I'm glad you came back to DC, uh, but it's powerful, and I'm uh again, congratulations. For those who may not know uh Queen Betty, what's the mission of the Miss Senior America pageant? And what does the dignity, maturity, the inner beauty of senior women mean to you personally?
SPEAKER_10I think what it means to me personally, I come from uh my mother was a Baptist minister who raised 10 children. So my mother talked about just because you're poor, you don't need to look like you're poor. So your presence and your articulation. My mother was an educator and special ed. So she raised all of us to present yourself, speak well, present yourself well, and always know that you are not defined by what other people say. So that's what I believe personally about beauty and presence. But it is a pageant, I believe, that the other eight contestants exuded the same type of energy as I did, um, with their talent, with their their philosophy of life. It is what are you going to do with your community different now with this crown as opposed to what you did without the crown? How do you impact your community differently? And mine is mentoring girls. And if I get them right, hopefully we will, when they have all these um teen curfews, then hopefully my contribution to young women will be no, we don't have to stay outside. We need to go in the house because we have a purpose now, and my purpose will not be fulfilled if I am outside, which is, you know, you're beautiful, go to sleep. Hollyberry said the only way you're gonna maintain your beauty is to go to sleep. Go to sleep, get up the next day, and then hopefully you'll have a different purpose.
SPEAKER_06Well, folks can't see you on this interview right now, but folks, I'm speaking to a beauty right right now in Queen uh Betty, uh mature and beautiful. What a dynamic combination uh in you, uh, my new friend. You had a talent portion in the pageant of Queen Betty. Uh tell us about what you performed and why it was meaningful to you.
SPEAKER_10Uh I'm a graduate of Eastern High School, and under the leadership, we were in the choir with Dr. Joyce Garrett. So we went, I went to her house, the first person I can think of to help me with my song. I did Jennifer Holiday. I ended up doing Jennifer Holiday, but I started out with summertime. So Dr. Garrett helped me with that. And when I left her, I heard on my phone, the radio on my phone came up, I am telling you, Jennifer Holiday. And in the lyrics, it talks about I'm gonna leave my past behind. What is your past, Betty? My past is has some toxicity. I used to wear a wig, so in the presentation, I pulled the wig off when it says, I'm gonna leave my past behind. It just resonated different than summertime. You know, look at me. Look at me. I'm telling you, look at me. So those words resonated differently than summertime, and that's how I ended up doing I'm telling you, um, by Jennifer Holliday. That was my presentation, I sang.
SPEAKER_06I wish we had a clip to share with our audience uh right now, because you're painting a picture with your uh words. Let's talk about uh Queen Betty uh community. What do you hope to accomplish during your reign as the Miss Senior DC or Miss District of Columbia, Senior America, and any causes are are there any causes close to your heart?
SPEAKER_10Uh my cause is always, has been, and it will be. It will be young women, young girls, the teen to help them mature into the women that they need to become. All the young ladies. I was the coordinator for Miss Côte d'Ivoire pageant, and to have all of those women, they were 20 to 25 to nurture them, it was a wonderful experience. My students came to the pageant at UDC, who has and I was so shocked that she came. She has five children, but she was there, very excited for me. So it is to be able to send me all your challenging daughters. I got them. Because when I'm finished with them and send them back to you, you will not know who they are. They will exude a presentation and a level of maturity that you haven't seen. I just think that that is that is really dear to my heart. And I'm a single parent of two daughters. So if I don't know anything else, I know how to raise girls.
SPEAKER_06Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. A crown with a mission. I love it, I love it. You're representing, you know, just so many women in your age uh group. What message do you want to share with other seniors now, right? Especially women who may be doubting their very own voice, their very own dreams, or even their value.
SPEAKER_10I think to those other seniors, what I would tell them is I wear this crown for me because I have it on, but this crown really is for all of us. All of us, every single person. You have a voice, don't stop speaking. You have a platform, don't stop giving, and don't stop being your best self. Period. Um, and don't allow anybody else to tell you what you can and cannot do, to put you in their box to project their um beliefs on you that you internalize, be who you are, authentically yourself as a senior. There's room for all of us, all of us, and just stay beautiful.
SPEAKER_06Absolutely, absolutely. So, how has I know it hasn't been long, but not has it hasn't been quite a month yet, a few weeks or so. How has this experience changed you so far, both personally, emotionally, or even spiritually?
SPEAKER_10I think that how it has changed me emotionally, my daughters and I, we I thought we were really close. We are really close now. Um, and my Oldest child was there creating a lot of records, just I love you, mom, everything. Um, so that was a wonderful mother moment. Um, and I think that it has changed me spiritually because I changed one of the words in the song. It says, Um Jennifer Holiday says, I've made a vow. I changed it to God, I made this vow. I made this vow to be able to represent seniors in a way where society sometimes has a tendency to think that in order for you to be a senior, you have to walk with a walker, or you have oxygen, or you can't do many things. So we can have a tendency to discount the value in what seniors bring. So hopefully I bring uh that kind of energy of um consistency, beauty, positivity. And I I I I definitely believe in motivating and nurturing and loving everybody. Love the seniors. My mentor was 97 in the pageant. So for me to have the 97 97-year-old, she reminds me of my mother, because my mother will be August the 3rd, would have been, I'll say, uh, she would be 100. So I love the elders. So much wisdom that I got that I can share. So hopefully somebody will see me. And if I am not in my queenish behavior, I hope that the elders will say, No, miss, let me help you. You know, and and I will act accordingly. And that's from the spiritual perspective, because my mother was a minister. So I understand that. So it's really changed me. It's changed the whole Betty Intaminger, the whole woman to become even better than I thought I was.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I've learned here, uh, Queen Betty, that growth doesn't stop at any age. We we are continuing to grow uh even in our seniorhood. So let's lift the curtain back a little bit with the time that we have left, uh, Queen Betty. Give us a behind-the-scenes glimpse. Any funny, unexpected, or moving moments from rehearsals or pageant day that really stuck with you? Now you know I can't tell you them secrets about how panny was. Just a little bit, just a little bit, a little something.
SPEAKER_10Um let me see. Any funny moments? Um, there were lots of funny moments. Um, we had and I I can't say I'm trying to compare it to another pageant, but in this particular pageant, we had an Asian participant. Let me tell you something, she was so, so funny. So funny. Her funny moment was the day of the pageant. She came in with her cultural um presentation, her gown. And for her to say, can you she came to me to say, um, can you pin me, please? Like right away. I said, excuse me. She said, yeah, right away. So everybody was exhibiting this kind of queenly behavior as a joke for all of us. So that was a funny moment for me because I did it to her and she did it back to me. Um I don't I don't think I had any moments that really stand out, stand out. They all were uh funny moments, but they were we had really serious rehearsals, very focused rehearsals. So the funny moments didn't happen as uh standout moments, they all were kind of pleasant.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I've asked that question or similar questions each year, and what I've learned from from you ladies is that there's a sisterhood that develops, you know, with your contestants, you know, friends, and et cetera, there, and that continues on after uh the pageant. So uh I've got a few more questions here, real quick. Queen Betty, tell us about your support system. You mentioned it briefly already, whether it's family, friends, mentors, who's been cheering you on and helping you shine along the way?
SPEAKER_10Um, first, the first person that has helped me and cheered me on, I will say, is God. Um, the second pay the person is even though my mother is not here, I I embody her spirit and whatever I do and say and how I carry myself. Um, I try to think about my mother raising 10 kids, and I am the ninth child on the lower end out of 10 to always um show up. And so my support system that's here is I have a brother that's mentally challenged after my mother passed. I took care of him for three years. And surprisingly, they brought 16 tickets. They were at the pageant, and they were just making lots of noise along with my daughter, my daughter-in-law. My youngest daughter did not make it with my only grandbaby. But I had, I must have sold maybe 120 tickets. So the support system is vast. My church community, that's a Metropolitan Baptist Church, was in the house. My um, the model side of me, my model friends were there in the house. My acting side of me, my acting friends were in the house, and just my friends that matriculated through school with me were there from Elliott, um, from Mori, Elliott Eastern, and the University of the District of Columbia, where I graduated. So it was a combination of a support system that was unbelievable because they sold tickets on top of the tickets I sold to them.
SPEAKER_06So well, it takes a village, and yours truly sounds mighty, mighty uh proud of you, as I am as well. So looking ahead, nationals will be sometime this fall, I suspect. Uh how are you preparing or how will you prepare for Miss Senior America national competition?
SPEAKER_10Um, I'm going twice now to the gym. I am preparing, um, carving out time where I can just be still and listen. That's that's for me, it's like a meditation process to know that I am moving in a direction that I should be to prepare. The nationals in October. So by the end of this month, I plan to have everything that I'm wearing, everything that I need in place. So when October comes, I I can just journey to wherever I need to be and head to Atlantic City because I don't like waiting to the last minute. Um preparing physically, mentally, and spiritually, that's what I'm doing. Um, and rounding up my friends, so we can buy ads in the souvenir book, so we can bring it back when I bring the crown back for Washington, D.C.
SPEAKER_06Well, let me say this: we are all behind you all the way to the top, and I know our listeners are uh as well. My last question for you, uh my new friend, what legacy do you hope to leave as Miss District of Columbia Senior America 2026? And will your and when your reign is done, how do you want to be remembered?
SPEAKER_10The legacy is my grandson always taught me that. He is eight now, he's gonna be nine. He says, uh, Nanaboo, you have to push through everything. You just gotta push through everything. The legacy is the push through everything don't stop. And hopefully that part of my legacy will manifest by the time I surrender the crown. I'll just be surrendering a crown, but I'll still have my crown of glory to be able to um continue this journey of loving and nurturing um people where they are, meeting them where they are to help them get to the next level of living.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, well, I have no doubt that your legacy will also be a legacy of light, a legacy of purpose, and a legacy of grace. Queen Betty, thank you, thank you, thank you for blessing us today with your joy, your journey, and your beautiful spirit. You are truly a shining example of what it means to age boldly, live fully, and uplift others along the way. From all of us here at the Senior Zone, congratulations once again on being crowned Miss District of Columbia Senior America 2026. And we'll be cheering you again all the way to the nationals. Thank you, uh, my friend, Queen Betty.
SPEAKER_10Thank you very much for having me, and thank you, audience, for listening to this interview. Thank you, thank you, guys.
SPEAKER_06Thank you, Queen Betty Insminger. Folks, this next break is brought to you by Compassion and Choices, empowering everyone to chart their own end of life journey. In life, choices matter.
SPEAKER_11Compassion and Choices is here to support you on your journey. Our organization provides a wealth of resources to help you navigate difficult decisions with compassion and understanding. Need guidance on end of life choices? Visit our website at compassionatechoices.org for a range of informative articles, toolkits, and personal stories. Our compassionate team is just a call away, ready to assist you. Because, let's face it, talking about death is not gonna kill you. Compassionate choices, empowering you to make choices that reflect your values.
SPEAKER_02Hi, neighbor. I'm inviting you and your wife to my husband's 65th birthday party next week.
SPEAKER_05Great. Has he applied for Medicare yet?
SPEAKER_02Not yet. It's very confusing.
SPEAKER_05Call Montgomery County Ship. They help me with questions about my Medicare coverage.
SPEAKER_02What's Montgomery County Ship?
SPEAKER_05It's ship, like a boat. Montgomery County State Health Insurance Assistance Program. They help seniors like us, or people with disabilities, or caregivers and families with Medicare insurance questions.
SPEAKER_02Can anyone call them?
SPEAKER_05Sure, as long as you live in Montgomery County. You can call them at 301-255-4250. Or check out their website at www.medicareabcd.org.
SPEAKER_02What's that number again?
SPEAKER_05Montgomery County Ship. 301-255-4250. Made possible with a grant from the U.S. Administration for Community Living through the state of Maryland and Montgomery County.
SPEAKER_12When you hear the chirp, it's time to do some work. Change the battery. Working smoke alarms save lives, including yours. For more information on smoke alarms and other fire prevention and safety tips, contact the DC Fire and EMS Department Fire Prevention Division at 202-727-1614. Or email us at FEMS.fireprevention at DC.gov.
SPEAKER_06Welcome
Segment 2: Dale Borglum
SPEAKER_06back to the Senior Zone. I am your host once again, Sean Perry. Now, family, this next conversation is about a topic many of us avoid: death. But we're not approaching it with fear. We're approaching it as a conversation about how to live more fully, love more deeply, care for one another, and find peace before the final chapter. My guest is Dale Borglum, an 83-year-old pioneer in the conscious dying movement, executive director of the Living Dying Project, and author of the new book, How to Live So You Can Die Without Fear. Dale Borglum, welcome to the CNZone. So good to be here, Sean. It is my honor and pleasure to have you here, sir. So let's begin. I want to begin with the title of your book, Dale, How to Live So You Can Die Without Fear. For a lot of people, especially our older adults, hearing the word death can make one tense up, right? So let's start gently. What does it mean to live in a way that helps us die without fear?
SPEAKER_01Well, the deep, dirty the dark, deep secret here is that the book is really not about dying. The book is about how to live without fear. And to the extent you're living without fear, then you're going to be dying without fear. The fact that we are going to die can be the inspiration to wake up now, right? Everybody's going to die. They don't know when. And if we really, really knew that, then here you and I are together. We're probably never going to see each other again. This is our chance to be together, to love each other. And to the extent there's a lot of fear in the middle, it's going to be difficult to really be present and enjoy this moment. So I'm not really focused on dying. I'm focused on how can I live without fear? How can I work with fear as it arises? And how can I then bring that to the people I work with? I have groups and clients, and I run this thing called the Living Dying Project that has the most complete website on the internet about conscious living and conscious dying. Now, I'm a recovering mathematician. I've got a PhD in mathematics, believe it or not. And my equation is that all fear is basically fear of dying. And fear of dying is the place that we're not enlightened, that we're not really connected with God, merged with the divine. So that there was a survey in the New York Times a number of years ago. What are you most afraid of? Number one was speaking in public, number three was dying, which is kind of funny. But at the same time, the part of you or me that's afraid of speaking in public, we might be awkward, we might get embarrassed, is the place where I think I'm separate, I'm gonna die. So if we look at each other, you're on the East Coast, I'm on the West Coast, uh, I'm older than you, I've got on a darker shirt than you. In one dimension, we're separate, we're gonna die, etc. Is there another dimension where you and I are one? Where there's something, consciousness, soul, that doesn't die. And in fact, without getting into all the details, modern quantum mechanics has proven that we're not individual perceiving devices perceiving an objective reality out there, that there's one consciousness flowing through us creating reality. That might sound kind of theoretical, but to the extent that we really get the fact that we are connected, we're interdependent, beyond that we're even one, there is something that doesn't die. That can help us to live without fear and hence then to die without fear.
SPEAKER_06You mentioned your website. I want to plug your website now. What is it?
SPEAKER_01Livingdying.org. L-I-V-I-N-G-D-Y-I-N-G. Livingdying.org.
SPEAKER_06Livingdying.org, folks. Livingdying.org. My next question, my friend, is you spent more than four decades working with people who were facing the end of life. From everything that you have witnessed, uh, Dale, what has death taught you about how we ought to be living while we still have breath in our bodies?
SPEAKER_01Well, that is the question, isn't it? And as I kind of implied just a minute ago, if I know that I'm going to die, that brings me into the moment. And it can bring me into the moment I can be afraid, or I can say, hey, this is my moment to appreciate the preciousness of life. So one answer is it helps us learn to work with fear. Fear of life, fear of death. How can we be with that fear that keeps us separated? And the book is about working with that in a moment-to-moment, day-to-day way. And on the other hand, just uh being around dying people has shown me, and whenever I say dying people, there's always the possibility that there's going to be a miraculous remission, a healing happened. I mean, I've been around so many cases where the doctor says, you've got a week to live, and now this person, six months later, is off on the beach in Hawaii enjoying life. So at the same time, I think we're more maybe afraid of the concept of dying. And uh in a lot of cultures, people really live in community. The grandparents are living with the children, living with the grandchildren. Grandpa dies, everybody sees this happen. It's a natural part of the unfolding of life. And uh it's not something uh, I mean, it's sad, but uh the Buddhists have this very interesting notion that compassion is a mixture of sadness and joy. I'm sad that they're suffering, but I'm joyful, a joy that transcends happiness and sadness because my heart is so open. So, can the fact that you and I are going to die inspire us to open our hearts, to be compassionate, to realize that even though the climate is degrading and there's political divisiveness and the economy is really shaky, and everywhere you look, there are imbalances. There's a crisis in almost every direction you look, and these crises are getting worse, it seems. They're going in the wrong direction. How do we deal with all that? We deal with all that by transformational consciousness. And individually and collectively can we begin to realize we're mortal, and that's the inspiration to be fully alive right now. So that's the book is not a downer about, oh, we're gonna die. This is a horrible thing. It's like, how can we be more awake right now? How can we deepen compassion? How can we be more in our bodies? You're gonna go for a bike ride. How fully can you enjoy that after the after the podcast is over and you're off riding a bike with your wife?
SPEAKER_06And I agree with you. I think it's powerful because sometimes it takes uh the awareness of life's limits, right, to remind us of what really matters. That's what I'm taking from, briefly from what you just shared with me. You also mentioned culture. And many families avoid talking about dying until a crisis forces the conversation. Uh, and I've seen it many times here uh through my work. Why do you think we're so afraid, Dale, to talk about death? And what is the cost of waiting too long to have those conversations?
SPEAKER_01Well, certainly the cost can be great because uh sometimes death happens suddenly. So the conversation never happens. Both of my parents died rather gradually from cancer, and I had a chance then to uh have very deep conversations and have a lot of closure about the father-son, the mother-son relationship that really was very healing for all concerned. What was the first part of the question? I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_06You know, why are we so afraid to talk about death?
SPEAKER_01Well, nobody really knows what happens after death, right? That this religion says one thing, that religion says another thing. Atheists, agnostics aren't sure. So we're talking about the unknown. And how do you deal with the unknown? How do you deal with uncertainty? Most people have a hard time with that, and death is the big unknown. Uh, I don't know if you're into meditation at all, but meditation is learning gradually, hopefully at your own speed, to be with the uncertainty of the next moment, to begin to be comfortable with change. And the work that we're talking about here is the work of healing, becoming more whole. Healing might lead to physical curing, but it might lead to healing into death. We don't know. But everybody wants to be happy, everybody wants to heal, and learning to trust the uncertainty, lost to trust the the flow of life. What do you have faith in? One of my first meditation teachers, Suzuki Roshi, said the most important thing is finding the most important thing. And when we find that most important thing, then hold on to it. And that will give one the faith and the trust to be with the unknown, to be with this constant change in impermanence.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, Dale, I can talk with you for hours, my friend, but the clock is ticking for us. One of the things you talk about in your book is living with an open heart in the face of death. For a senior right now who is dealing with illness, aging, isolation, loneliness, or the loss of a loved one, what does an open heart look like in real, everyday life?
SPEAKER_01Well, that's a tricky question to answer quickly, because there are uh practices, abilities that one needs to deal with before you get to the open heart, as the book talks about. And uh in the book we explore how uh stages of early childhood development, the 12-step programs, the awakening of the chakras, etc., they're all saying essentially the same thing. The open heart comes after learning to deal with fear, guilt, and shame, uh, early stages of childhood. So that people come to me as a as a teacher, as a counselor, and say, I want my heart to be more open. And they have this big bag of fear, guilt, and shame over their shoulder. And I said, Well, it's great, you want to open your heart, but before that, let's begin to form a loving, embodied relationship with these difficult emotions that you've been not dealing with too uh clearly yet. Once you do have that foundation of trusting it's safe to be here, I'm grounded, I'm centered, the martial art of being me have worked with once grief, then uh uh the open heart has qualities of being connected, of being spacious, not a lot of clinging and grasping. So, right now, few and the audience, do you feel connected? Do you feel connected to yourself? Do you feel connected to me? Do you feel connected to the earth? Do you feel connected to God if you believe in God? So that one can go out through go through the day after. Asking, am I connected? Is my heart warm? But I really like that feeling of connectedness. I keep checking in. Am I connected? Or am I judging myself? Am I hard on myself? Am I judging these other people? It's possible to see what's going on politically and not like it or really like it. And not get lost in that. To keep your heart open, no matter whether you agree or disagree with any particular politician. Can you say no with an open heart rather than having to close your heart to say no?
SPEAKER_06Dale, this is a uh uh will be now classifying this as a teaser interview. I'm already inviting you back because I'm gonna dive deeper into this conversation because I'm enjoying it, uh, and I'm the one doing the interviewing. Uh so I invite you back. Real quick, where can our folks get their hands, their eyes on your book?
SPEAKER_01Well, as they say, I guess wherever fine books are sold, it's on Amazon and Barnes and Noble and bookshop.com. And uh by the time the podcast comes out, the book's gonna be released. Right now, you and I are talking, it's gonna be released tomorrow, but uh June 16th. But it it should be wherever you can find a book online and hopefully in some of your local bookstores. Thank you so much for asking.
SPEAKER_06No problem at all, my friend. And as we close, my last question for you I want you to speak directly to the older adult who may be afraid right now, afraid of illness, afraid of being alone, afraid of dying, afraid of leaving loved ones behind. What would you want them to know today?
SPEAKER_01Very often when fear arises, we get lost in the trigger. We don't feel the fear. Healing happens through direct contact. What does it feel like to be afraid? What does it feel like in your belly? What does it feel like in your heart? In English, we say, I am afraid. In Spanish, you tengo miedo, I have fear. In Tibetan, fear is here. Fear is just a passing emotion, a passing mind-body state. Healing will happen by becoming intimate, having a merciful relationship with what it actually feels like to be afraid, rather than getting lost in the story about it. Beginning to really connect with that part of yourself.
SPEAKER_06Ladies and gentlemen, my guest has been Dale Borglum, executive director of the Living Dying Project, and author of the new book, How to Live So You Can Die Without Fear. Family, I know this was a tender conversation, but sometimes the conversations we avoid are the ones that can free us. Talking about death does not mean giving up on life, it can help us live with more love, more honesty, and more peace. Dale Borglum, thank you, thank you, thank you for joining us here on the Senior Zone.
SPEAKER_01Thanks for having me, Sean. So good to be with you.
SPEAKER_06You are quite welcome. And two hour listeners stay with us. There's more to come here on the Senior Zone. This next break is brought to you by AARP DC, your wise friend and fierce defender in Washington, D.C. When we return, it's birthdays of the week, followed by Dear Grave Woman. Then it's your later life throwdown. We'll be right back.
SPEAKER_11Today is your day to connect with AARP and DC. AARP is here in the District of Columbia working hard to make it an even better place to live, work, and play for people of all ages, and you can help. Put your skills and talents to good use as an AARP volunteer where you can help lead local events or become an advocate for the issues that matter in your community, like funding for programs that help district residents age with dignity and independence. AARP is also helping you get the most out of life. Check out their educational workshops where they can help you grow as a caregiver, find a job, and teach you about the latest technology, or enjoy a night out at any of their exciting local events, like their happy hours and free movie screenings. Today is your day to connect with your community and with AARP. So let's take on today and every day. Learn more at aarp.org slash DC.
SPEAKER_03Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you!
SPEAKER_11Happy birthday.
Birthdays of the Week
SPEAKER_06It is now time for the favorite part of the show for Sean Perry. Birthday shout outs. That's right. And as always, we celebrate these birthday lives exactly the way they were shared with us because every year is a blessing and every birthday is worth honoring. First up, we have Louise Wardrick Austin, 83. Today, Monday, July 6th from Washington, D.C. Happy birthday, Louise Roland Jones, 65, red, white, and blue, Medicare eligible today. Monday, uh, July 6th from Lanham, Maryland. Happy birthday, Roland. Prisoner Kupiti Anderson, 72. Today as well, July 6th from Bethesda, Maryland. Happy birthday, prisoner friend here, Ava Stanley, 66. Tuesday, July 7th from Upper Marlboro, Maryland. Happy birthday, Ava. Bishop Craig Coates is 60 years young on Wednesday, July 8th from Glen Burney, Maryland. He's the pastor of Fresh Start Church. Happy birthday, Bishop Craig Coates. Sharon Carter Nixon is 69 on Wednesday, July 8th from Temple Hills, Maryland. Happy birthday, Sharon. A buddy here, WYCB, Agnes Lewis Smith, 61 on Thursday, July 9th from Washington, D.C. Happy, happy birthday, Agnes Louise or Lois Ann Smith Curtis. Lois and Smith Curtis is 81 on Friday, July 10th from Temple Hills, Maryland. Happy birthday, Lois. Sylvine Mason is 76 on Friday, July 10th from Upper Marlboro, Maryland. Happy birthday, Sylvine. Mark Ashfriend here, 62. Social Security eligible, Mark, on Friday, July 10th from Crofton, Maryland. Happy birthday, Mark. And last but not least, Kim Strain, 61 on Friday, July 10th from Houston, Texas. Happy birthday, Kim. Folks, happy birthday to each and every one of you. May this next chapter bring you peace, bring you laughter, strength, good health, and the kind of joy that sneaks up on you and stays for a while. And remember to have your birthday announced here on the senior zone. Just send us an email. Send that email to info at theseniorzone.com. That's INFO at theseniorzone.com. Make sure to include your full name, your birth date, the age that you are turning, along with your city and
Dear Grave Woman by Joelle Simone
SPEAKER_06state. And now, family, it's time for Dear Grave Woman featuring Joelle Simone, a moment of reflection, honesty, healing, and heart. Joelle, the mic is yours, my friend.
SPEAKER_09Hey Sean, and welcome back, everyone, to Dear Grave Woman. My name is Joelle Simone. I'm known all over the world as the Grave Woman. And this Dear Grave Woman segment started, believe it or not, on TikTok. And it has been a year since my dear friend and someone that I look up to, and dare I call a mentor, Mr. Sean Perry, blessed me with the opportunity to share this segment here on the senior zone with you all. And so today I want to start off the segment by saying, Sean, thank you so much for this opportunity. I want to continue with the message that so much can change in a year, especially as it relates to grief, loss, and planning for the inevitable. Sean, I am not shy about sharing that when we first started this journey together with the Dear Grave Woman segment here on the senior zone, I was navigating the probably most difficult time of my life. My marriage was ending. I felt like the rug had been pulled from under me. And I know that even though it is a different type of loss in grief, it reflects some of the same feelings that many of our listeners are experiencing when it comes to thinking about the inevitable or experiencing personal loss in grief. And so the message for today is simple give yourself time. Give yourself time in your grief journey. Give yourself the opportunity to open up and have new experiences. Give yourself the time to redefine and relearn who you are after loss. When we started a year ago, Sean, I was confused, I was lost, and I was really scrambling to try to hold on to something that needed to end. And ultimately it did end, but at the same time, it birthed a new version of the Grave Woman of Joel Simone and a new version of the senior zone where Dear Grave Woman exists. And so again, the message for today is simple. Give yourself time. If any of you out there are experiencing loss and you have questions about how you can navigate that grief, have questions about how you can plan for the future that all that awaits us all, which is a future where death is included. And if you have questions about preparing yourself and your loved ones to help that become a smooth transition, please send your questions to thegravewoman at gmail.com. Sean, thank you so much for this life-changing, affirming, and just positive opportunity. Back to you for the Later Life Lowdown.
Later Life Lowdown
SPEAKER_06Joelle, you hit it out the park. Thank you once again for giving us language to the things so many people feel but don't always know how to say. That's the power of this space. We talk about life, loss, love, laughter, and everything in between. And now, family, it's time for this week's Later Life Lowdown. A few resources, reminders, and community notes to help you stay informed, connected, and supported. First up in Washington, D.C., if you are 60 and older, the DC Department of Aging and Community Living continues to be a key starting point for services, transportation, villages, caregiver support, and aging resources. You can call DC Department of Aging and Community Living at 202-724-5626. One more time, that's 202-724-5626. Also, indeed, check out Aroundtown DC. Just Google it. Aroundtown DC. They offer free wellness and community programs for DC residents 60 and older, both in person and virtually. And for DC residents who may need help staying safe and connected, some senior services that so others might eat or may eat senior services supports residents aged 60 and older. You can call 202-938-2907 to learn more. That's 202-938-2907. Over in Maryland, the Maryland Access Point, better known as MAP Remains, one of the best first calls for older adults, adults with disabilities, caregivers, and families looking for services and support, call 844-627-5465. That's 844-627-5465. And don't forget, Maryland also offers information on older adult benefits, meals, Medicare counseling, long-term care resources, and support services through Maryland.gov and the Maryland Access Point. Now in Northern Virginia, Fairfax County's Aging, Disability, and Caregiver Resources line is available to older adults, caregivers, and people with disabilities. Call 703-324-7948. That's 703-324-7948. And in Arlington, the Area Agency on Aging connects residents, 60 and older, people with disabilities, and caregivers to support. Call 703-228-1700. That's 703-228-1700. If you are in Arlington and in Alexandria, the Division of Aging and Adult Services can help older adults connect with programs like caregiver support, nutrition resources, and summer cooling assistance. Just call 703-746-5999. That's 703-746-5999. And across the DMV, heck, across the country, I always want to remind you about benefitscheckup.org. It's a website. It's a free tool that helps older adults and people with disabilities find programs that may help with food, health care, utilities, prescriptions, and daily expenses. The website again is benefitscheckup.org.
Closing Remarks
SPEAKER_06Well, family, the pencil broke. That is all she wrote. It is the end of another edition of the Senior Zone. I thank you for spending part of your day with us. Thank you for listening, for sharing, for calling, for encouraging somebody else, and for continuing to prove that aging is not about fading away. It's about showing up with wisdom, purpose, and a story still being written. And one more thing, the senior zone has always been about more than a moment. It's about building something that lasts. That's why we are available now as a podcast so these conversations they can live on, they can be revisited, and they can be shared. Just search the senior zone wherever you listen to podcasts. And that's a wrap for this week's Later Life Lowdown, where the info is fresh, the love is real, and the goal is always to enrich your journey. So until we meet again, keep your head high, keep your heart full, and always be someone who makes someone else look forward to their tomorrow. Love you. Peace.
SPEAKER_08Be sure to join us on our next broadcast.
SPEAKER_03Until then, live simply, love generously.
SPEAKER_08Care deeply, speak kindly, and leave the rest to God. Have a wonderful week, and God willing, the senior zone will be here for another informative and entertaining hour next Monday morning at 10 a.m.
.png)