The Senior Zone
The Senior Zone is the DMV’s #1 weekly radio program dedicated to empowering adults 50+ to live fuller, healthier, and more informed lives — now available on demand as a podcast.
Hosted by Shawn Perry since 2012, The Senior Zone features thoughtful conversations with trusted experts, community leaders, advocates, and everyday people doing extraordinary work in aging, health, finance, caregiving, and purposeful living. From timely resources and consumer protections to inspiration, wisdom, and real talk — this is where experience meets opportunity.
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The Senior Zone
Ep. 719 | Comfort, Confidence and Connection After 50
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This week on The Senior Zone, Shawn Perry leads two honest, judgment-free conversations about living comfortably and confidently after 50.
Dentist Dr. Yasmeen Ahmad of Mary’s Center explains what older adults and caregivers should know about dentures—from proper fit and daily care to discomfort, slipping, eating, speaking and affordability.
Then nationally recognized sex educator, author and ageless-sexuality advocate Joan Price joins Shawn for a candid discussion about dating, desire, intimacy, companionship, touch and sexuality in later life.
The episode also features Birthdays of the Week, Dear Grave Woman with Joelle Simone and the Later Life Lowdown.
Thank you for listening and until we meet again…keep your head high, your heart full, and always — be someone who makes someone else look forward to their tomorrow.
Opening Remarks and Weekly Vitamin
SPEAKER_04Welcome to the Senior Zone, where we connect older adults with the organizations and resources that serve them.
SPEAKER_09The Senior Zone's goal forward aims to educate, empower, enlighten, entertain, and engage older adults with the tools of information to stay healthy, happy, and secure.
SPEAKER_04Great guests, health tips, upcoming events, and useful information.
SPEAKER_09So get ready to take notes and have some fun.
SPEAKER_04It's now time for the senior zone.
SPEAKER_07Good morning, good morning, family, and welcome to the Senior Zone, the DMV's number one weekly radio program serving our 50 plus community since 2012. I am your host, Sean Perry, and today we're talking about caring for our bodies, relationships, and sense of self without embarrassment or judgment. In segment one, we're focusing on dentures, how they should fit, how to care for them, and what to do when they hurt, slip, or interfere with eating and speaking. Joining me is Dr. Yasmin Ahmad, a dentist with Mary Center. And then in segment two, we're opening the door to an honest conversation about dating, desire, companionship, intimacy, and touch after 50. Joan Price, sex educator and ageless sexuality advocate, joins us to remind us that getting older does not mean becoming invisible. And that brings me to this week's weekly vitamin. Folks, you are never too old to ask better questions, seek greater comfort, or reclaim a part of yourself you thought time had taken away. Aging is not the closing of a door, it is an invitation to move forward with wisdom and less fear. And that is your weekly vitamin. Folks, later in the show we'll celebrate our birthdays of the week. We'll hear from Dear Grave Woman with Joelle Simone and then share your later life lowdown. The podcast is also available on demand after this broadcast. We thank our sponsors and partners for helping us. Don't change that dial. I promise we'll be right back.
SPEAKER_04Legal Counsel for the Elderly champions the dignity and rights of D.C. elders by providing free legal and social work services to those in need. Worried about eviction or foreclosure? Need help obtaining Social Security or Veterans Benefits? Call Legal Counsel for the Elderly at 202-434-2120. Income eligibility applies. LCE is an affiliate of AARP 202-434-2120.
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SPEAKER_07Welcome back,
Dr. Yasmeen Ahmad: Dentures After 50
SPEAKER_07family. This is the Senior Zone, and I am your host, Sean Perry. Now, when we talk about healthy aging, we often focus on the heart, our joints, or keeping our minds sharp. But being able to eat comfortably, speak clearly, and smile with confidence matters just as much. For many older adults, however, dentures become part of that journey. But questions about fit, comfort, cleaning, eating, and affordability can make the process confusing. So today we're having a practical conversation about what dentures can do, what they cannot do, and what every older adult should know before and after getting them. Joining me now is Dr. Yasmin Ahmad, a dentist with Mary Center, who is committed to providing patient-centered, culturally sensitive care. Dr. Ahmad, welcome to the Senior Zone.
SPEAKER_00Hello, thank you for having me.
SPEAKER_07It's a pleasure to have you here. Dr. Ahmad, let's begin with the basics. When someone hears the word dentures, myself included, they may picture the traditional full set their grandparents wore. What types of dentures are available today, and how do you determine which option is best for a particular patient?
SPEAKER_00That's a great question. So now we do have a lot of different types of dentures for patients. You have your what you're kind of referring to, which is called the full or complete dentures, and those ones replaced all of the teeth on the top and bottom. And they sit directly on the gums, and they kind of rely on both neuromuscular control, like keeping the bottom denture in through using the muscles in your tongue and your cheeks, versus the top denture, which is kind of held in with like a suction cup to the roof of your mouth. And those are the standard dentures if you have no remaining teeth. If you do have some healthy remaining teeth, you can get something called a partial. And a partial just replaces the teeth that are missing. And the partials come as like a cast metal, which has the metal framework that attaches to the teeth. And then you have the rest of the denture in acrylic, or you can get ones that are all acrylic. In either case, the dentures will kind of or partials will attach to your remaining teeth. And then in addition to those two, you also have implant-retained dentures or implant supported dentures, also called over dentures. And those ones are for people who maybe don't have a lot of bone support to be able to hold a standard denture. So they'll get a few implants, and those implants will serve as sort of an abutment for the partial or the denture to kind of snap onto. And so yeah, those are kind of the main options for patients. And it really just depends on what you're coming in with. Do you have any remaining teeth? Are they healthy? Um, what's your bone level and things like that?
SPEAKER_07Yeah, so it sounds like there are many more choices available today than most of us, you know, uh realize. So thank you for answering that question. Uh, at what point, Dr. Ahmad, should someone begin seriously considering dentures? Are there signs that repairing or saving the remaining teeth may not be the healthiest choice anymore or the most practical option?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, for sure. So I think it really comes down to, you know, where you're at with your oral hygiene. If you come in and you also have a lot of bone loss, um, something we call gum disease or periodontal disease, and the teeth are very loose and painful. Um, those teeth sometimes we will deem them unrestorable. If it gets to the point where they're so loose that even with some deep cleanings and some proper oral hygiene, the bone level is just too low to be able to support a restoration or to support um holding a denture or a partial. Um, another thing is if you have a lot of tooth decay, and again, same situation where um there comes a point sometimes where if the tooth has broken down so much that we can no longer do a root canal or a crown or a filling and those teeth need to be removed. That's another indication to getting those teeth replaced with either a partial or a denture. And then in addition to that, um you have some patients that may have some teeth remaining in their mouth, but let's say they only have the teeth towards the front or they're missing some back teeth on one side, that's limiting their ability to chew adequately. And, you know, being able to chew is not just important for enjoying your food, but it's also important just to get your basic nutrition. So if you have um, you know, a patient who's not able to get the nutrients that they need because they have troubles um chewing their food, um, also even talking, things like that, paying attention to those things, um, those people would definitely be um good candidates to get a partial or a denture to help not only improve their smile but their overall um chewing ability and functionality.
SPEAKER_07Lots of great information. One concern uh we often hear, Dr. Maud, is will people be able to tell that, you know, I'm wearing dentures, right? How natural can today's dentures look, feel, and function when they are properly made and fitted?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so dentures today have come a long way. Um they can look very, very natural. Um, again, a big part of it is really speaking to your dentist and kind of being clear on what sort of things you're looking for. Obviously, we have certain parameters we have to work with, but in terms of the color and shape, um, those are things that you can definitely try to customize per patient. Um, sometimes patients even come in with a picture of themselves maybe from when they were younger, and they want to match those teeth. We can try our best to do that. Um and yeah, we also look at, you know, your facial proportion, skin tone, lip support, things like that to try to create something that is going to give you the best look aesthetically while also again being functional for the patients.
SPEAKER_07Let's talk about fit, uh, Dr. Maud. Some people assume that slipping, uh uh clicking or rubbing or sore gums are simply the things that they have to live with when they uh have dentures. What should properly fitted dentures feel like? And what warning signs tell us that an adjustment is needed?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so with dentures, I will say it is always an adjustment, period. Um, you know, you are now having something foreign in your mouth, and that in itself takes some time to get used to. Um, but when it comes to the fit, if you notice you're having certain um persistent sore spots or a kind of like a friction point that the denture is constantly rubbing against a certain area, that is not normal. That definitely, you know, should be addressed if you come in. Oftentimes it just takes a little adjustment of the denture to create a more even fit. Um, also, if you're noticing that the denture is frequently slipping or dislodging when you're eating or speaking, um, those are things also to address because a denture should be able to stay in your mouth. Um, you shouldn't have to constantly readjust it. And if you do, that's probably a sign that maybe the denture is old and it needs to be readjusted or redone, or maybe the denture needs to simply be adjusted if there is a sore spot or something that's not allowing it to seat fully. Um, other things to look for is if you're biting your cheek or lip. Um, sometimes those things are just um aspects of getting used to a denture and kind of working with the muscles in your mouth. But if it's becoming a frequent issue, um then it's possible that the dentures need to be adjusted again.
SPEAKER_07Just great information. You know, just like every other part of our bodies, right, our mouths and jaw bones, uh, they change as we age, as I understand it. So even if a denture fit well when it was first made, can it become loose over time? And my second question uh to that is how often should someone have their dentures as well as the health of their mouth uh professionally evaluated?
SPEAKER_00Sure. So yeah, you're definitely right. As we age, um, you know, your bone density does decrease. And especially when you are using a denture or a partial, you are also having that force hitting um hitting your bone. And over time, the bone does tend to um recede or decrease a bit. Um now that can vary person to person how quickly that bone density decreases. Um, but a general rule of thumb is people say within you know a course of five years, oftentimes people do need replacements. Sometimes it happens sooner, sometimes it happens later. Again, it really just depends on patient to patient. Um, sometimes it's a matter of just relining the denture, not getting a new one completely, but they definitely can loosen over time. Um, another thing, like with your second question, is making sure you come in to have your dentures evaluated. We recommend coming in at least once a year. Um, and that way we can not only assess the fit of your dentures, see if any adjustments need to be made, but also, you know, assess your tissue, check for um oral cancer screenings, and just make sure that your overall oral health is still on track, and then obviously also look at those dentures, making sure they still fit okay.
SPEAKER_07Yeah, well, that's a good reminder. One year uh that having your dentures does not eliminate the need for regular dental appointments. So we still need that one year check of whether you have dentures or not. I'm not a denture wearer, uh, Dr. Ahmad, but I understand that eating is often one of the biggest adjustments. What advice do you give a new denture wearer who is struggling to chew, taste food, or maintain a healthy diet?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's a really great question. I know it's something that a lot of people struggle with. I think again, one big thing to remember is that it does take practice. Um, chewing with dentures is not something that's just gonna happen overnight. Um, you typically want to start slow and easy. So, what I recommend is starting with softer foods, things like soft cooked vegetables or you know, eggs, things like fish or yogurt, just things that are very soft and easy to chew, just as you're starting out. Um, I recommend cutting them into small pieces and placing the food on both sides of your mouth so that you're chewing on both sides at the same time. And the reason I say that is because if you are just chewing on one side and you're putting that pressure on the one side, it can sometimes dislodge the denture easily. Versus if you have it on both sides and you're kind of applying more even pressure, the denture tends to stay in better. Um, so practicing that and then working your way up to you know harder foods. I do think in general, avoid biting into really hard foods like an apple or corn on the cob, things like that. It's better just to slice those foods into smaller, more manageable sizes to eat. Um, aside from that, another thing I always hear from patients is an adjustment to their like taste perception. And a big part of that is when you have like um an upper denture, the ones that replace the top teeth, they frequently cover the palate or the roof of your mouth. And the palate does contain some taste buds that help with um obviously enjoying your food and getting the taste. Um, but I always tell patients to wait a couple weeks because oftentimes the brain adapts over the course of a couple weeks, and that taste perception generally improves over time.
SPEAKER_07Great information, Dr. Ahmad. I love having you here, just a ball of information. You know, many older adults experience uh dry mouth sometimes because of medications and other times because of health conditions. How can dry mouth affect denture comfort, denture fit, and the risk of irritation or infection?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, saliva is super, super important. Um, not only does it act as like a sort of natural lubricant in our mouth, um, just in terms of comfortability, but um, especially with the top denture, the saliva actually acts as kind of like um it's like a thin layer that allows for that suction to happen. Um, so having reduced saliva flow can definitely impact the fit of the denture. It also can sometimes make it a little bit more uncomfortable if it's rubbing against kind of more delicate or dry tissue. Um, so those things um are areas that are obviously very difficult for patients, especially when they're taking various medications that could be causing that dry mouth. I definitely recommend, you know, trying different artificial saliva sprays, staying hydrated, drinking water frequently, avoiding things like, you know, alcohol um um oral rinses. There are alcohol-free versions that can kind of help reduce that sort of dry mouth. And another um step is to talk to your primary care doctor. If the dry mouth is becoming a very big issue for you, sometimes there are alternate medications that we can look into to see if you can swap those out and help reduce that dry mouth. Um, but if it is a medicine that you have to be taking, again, there are different sprays and rinses that can help to increase that saliva flow.
SPEAKER_07Yeah, Dr. Ahmad, as I was preparing for this discussion, because I'm I'm really I have no background or reference with dentures. So as I was preparing, I learned that there's confusion around dental adhesives. Uh so when are creams, powders, or strips helpful and when might heavy or even frequent adhesive use be covering up a larger problem uh with uh one's denture fit?
SPEAKER_00Mm-hmm. Yeah, another really, really great question and something that's pretty misunderstood, I would say. Um when it comes to your denture adhesives, you really do not want to be using them every day. If you're finding yourself having to apply a thick layer of that adhesive just to keep your denture in on a day-to-day basis, that's definitely a sign that there could be something wrong, that the denture just doesn't actually fit well, and you may need a reline or you may need a denture, a new denture made altogether. Um, that being said, adhesives can be helpful in certain scenarios. Um, for example, if you, you know, are kind of getting used to your denture when you first get them and you just want a little extra support as you're again practicing eating and speaking, applying a small amount, like three to four little dots on the inside of the surface of the denture can help to make it feel a little bit more secure. But I definitely recommend not becoming reliant on that adhesive, especially for the lower denture, which does take again that neuromuscular control, practicing keeping the denture in with the muscles in your mouth. Um, you don't want to get to the point where you've just become reliant on that adhesive and you you haven't built up that control. Um, but like I said, if you do want to wear it for, you know, a big event and you want that extra security and that extra peace of mind, I will tell patients to go ahead and use a little bit of that adhesive. But using a large amount, especially chronically, um, it's definitely not good for you in terms of learning to wear your dentures, but also not good for your health to be exposed to that sort of adhesive over such a long period of time and potentially swallowing a little bit of it over time. Um, so yeah, if you do find yourself needing that all the time, I would say to come in and make sure that your denture fits well.
SPEAKER_07Yeah, Dr. Amart, the clock is ticking on us. We don't have too much time, but walk us through the right way to care for dentures each day. What should people use to clean them? Should they sleep in them? And what common cleaning mistakes can damage, you know, the appliance or irritate the mouth?
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So I definitely recommend after meals removing those dentures and just rinsing them off just to get rid of any small food debris that might have built up. But then at the end of the day, you definitely always want to take out your denture and not sleep in them unless you have been told by your dentist to do that. But most cases you should be removing that denture and brushing it with either a denture brush or a soft bristled brush. And you want to be using a non-abrasive cleaner. I honestly tell patients you can use a soft hand soap. Um, and that really helps to clean the denture, but it doesn't have that abrasive risk of scratching your denture teeth or the acrylic. And when you get those tiny little scratches, you can actually harbor bacteria that way. Um, I do also recommend soaking the denture in the water overnight so that the acrylic doesn't dry out. And every so often you can actually buy some of those tablets to stick in the water, and that'll help to also clean the denture too. Um, but again, very, very important to take them out. Your soft tissue really needs time to breathe overnight, and not taking your dentures out or cleaning them frequently enough can put you at increased risk of infection, especially fungal infections. Um, so really um keeping the dentures clean is very important.
SPEAKER_07Great, great stuff, Dr. Ahmad. Um, finally, uh my friend, you know, cost and access can prevent uh people from seeking dental care, as I know you already know. For an older adult living on a fixed income or someone who has gone years without seeing a dentist, what would you say to them to take that first step? How might Mary Center help connect? Connect them with appropriate care.
SPEAKER_00For sure. Yeah, I think that is one of the biggest barriers for a lot of patients. And thankfully, we have places like Mary Center that are here to help. I think the first step is just coming in for an appointment. We have a lot of resources for patients. If it comes down to a patient who has Medicare or Medicaid, we accept those insurances. If you have a patient that doesn't have insurance at all, we offer a sliding fee scale. And in addition to that, we also have access to social workers who can also help patients who maybe do have the ability to get insurance, but they just need some help along the way. You can schedule something with the social worker to kind of help you with the steps of trying to get insurance. But making that first step to get the appointment is so important because once you come in, we can see what's going on in your mouth, identify the areas that need help. If we need to make a referral, we can make a referral. Otherwise, we can, you know, start treatment right away for patients and get you to a better place. I have to drop our um our number on this call because I think it's super important that patients are able to get that access. But if you do need to make an appointment, all you have to do is call our number, which is 844-796-2797. We'll be connected with someone to help you make an appointment. And if you need help with insurance navigation, you can be connected to again, some specialist that can help you out here.
SPEAKER_07Folks, that number was 844-796-2797. One more time, 844-796-2797. Dr. Mart, thank you for joining us and helping remove some of the mystery and hopefully some of the stigma surrounding dentures. Family, the main takeaway today is that dentures should help restore your quality of life, not become another source of daily discomfort. If yours are slipping, hurting, affecting what you eat, or causing sores, don't assume that it is simply part of getting older. Schedule a dental evaluation and let a professional determine what needs to be adjusted. My guest has been Dr. Yasmin Ahmad, dentist with Mary Center. Again, that number was 844-796-2797. Dr. Ahmad, thank you for the work that you are doing and spending time with us here today on the CNZone. Thank you, my friend. Thank you. You are quite welcome. Folks, this next break is brought to you by Compassion and Choices, empowering everyone to chart their own end-of-life journey. Don't change that doll, I promise we'll be right back. And life choices matter.
SPEAKER_11Compassion and Choices is here to support you on your journey. Our organization provides a wealth of resources to help you navigate difficult decisions with compassion and understanding. Need guidance on end-of-life choices? Visit our website at compassionatechoices.org for a range of informative articles, toolkits, and personal stories. Our compassionate team is just a call away, ready to assist you. Because, let's face it, talking about death is not gonna kill you. Compassionate choices, empowering you to make choices that reflect your values.
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SPEAKER_06Montgomery County Ship. 301-255-4250. Made possible with a grant from the U.S. Administration for Community Living through the state of Maryland and Montgomery County.
SPEAKER_10Growing older shouldn't mean giving up your independence, connections, or the life you love. The DC Department of Aging and Community Living supports district residents with nutritious meals, transportation, caregiver assistance, benefits counseling, and resources to help you remain safe and independent at home. For more information, call 202-724-5626 or visit dthl.dc.gov. The DC Department of Aging and Community Living, helping older adults, people with disabilities, and caregivers live well in the communities they call home.
SPEAKER_07Welcome
Joan Price: Intimacy and Dating After 50
SPEAKER_07back, family, to the Senior Zone. I am your host, Sean Perry. Now listen, this next conversation may make some folks lean in, some folks blush, and some folks say, Finally, somebody is talking about it. Because love, intimacy, dating, desire, companionship, touch, none of that disappears just because we have a few birthdays behind us. So joining me now is Joan Price, nationally known sex educator, author of Naked at Our Age, talking out loud about senior sex and sex after grief. And the subject of the upcoming documentary, Ask Joan. Joan has spent years helping older adults talk honestly, safely, and without shame about sexuality and intimacy in later life. Joan Price, welcome back to the Senior Zone.
SPEAKER_05I am so happy to be with you. Thank you, Sean Perry.
SPEAKER_07It's always, I'm just so excited to always have you here on the Senior Zone. So, Joan, let's start right here. Why do you think people get so uncomfortable talking about sex, intimacy, and desire after 50, 60, 70, and beyond?
SPEAKER_05I wish it weren't true, but it is that people are really kind of squeaked out by the whole topic. And that comes from really two places. It comes from society telling us that as older people we are no longer desirable or worthy of sex or we're creepy if we even care about that. And then that combined with our internalized ageist and sexist and sex negative messages throughout our life. We never learned to talk about sex when we were young. We were never, we were mainly taught in our sex education, just be afraid of it and avoid it because uh-uh, mm-mm, someone trying to take advantage of you, you'll get pregnant, your life will be ruined. And and no one talked to us about, hey, here's why you might want to do it, because it really feels good.
SPEAKER_07Yeah, you know, that's such an important place to start, uh Joan, because sometimes the silence does more damage than the subject itself. Uh, you use the phrase ageless sexuality, right? You use that for a long time now. But someone listening who may be thinking, that part of my life is behind me. What does ageless sexuality really mean, Joan?
SPEAKER_05Ageless sexuality means that we can stay in touch with our uh sexual desire, our sexual function, our sexual uh satisfaction, our spiciness. But a part of that means reinventing what sex means to us now. As we get older, certain parts don't work the way they used to before. We have to make adjustments. And for people who think, as so many people do, unfortunately, that if I can't have sex the way I always used to, or it doesn't feel good, or it hurts, or it's not possible, then sex is over for me. No, it means we just uh expand our notion of what gives us sexual pleasure and explore what that means to us now with the bodies we're in now, with the relationships we're in now. And we re-constantly reinvent how to have pleasurable sexual uh interactions with uh with a partner or with ourselves.
SPEAKER_07Good stuff. I love it, uh Joan, because that opens the door without putting pressure on anybody to be who they used to be. Right? I think of what that's what I just I take away from what you just said. As we come through the summer uh season, we're in mid-August right now, family reunions, travel, cookouts, social events, a lot of old adults may be meeting new people. What should dating after 50 look and feel like in a healthy way, Joan?
SPEAKER_05Well, well, you know I have a whole 90-minute webinar on exactly that subject. It's called How the Heck Do I Date at This Age? One of the things that I would say, because I can't give you the 90 minutes in a few minutes here, is it's never too late. I found love twice in later life. I found love when I was uh 57, I found love again at 73. Um it is never too late. It may be a different way of meeting people, of getting to know them. But what you can do besides reinventing how sex works for you, reinvent who you wanted to be in the world. We don't, you know, we're not stuck back at, I hope, trying to regain our youthful selves. You know, that ship is past. So instead, let's see what motorboat we can get on right now that really is fun to ride in the water. I'm taking this this analogy way too far. But it's always reinvention, it's creativity, it's saying to ourselves, well, as long as this is what's going on for me now, what can I do about it? What do I want to do? What do I really want to bring into my life? How do I go about doing that?
SPEAKER_07Yeah, I think it's good because you know, dating later in life is not about pretending to be young again. That's like you said, that ship has sailed. It's about just being honest about who we are now, right? And so with that being said, uh Joan, many older adults are single again because of divorce, widowhood, uh, caregiving loss, or just taking a different turn uh in life. How does someone begin reconnecting with their romantic or sensual self after a long pause?
SPEAKER_05Well, one thing is just self-pleasure. That if that for for many reasons. I mean, one is there's no reason not to, but also, also, you need to know who you are sexually at this time of life. And in the event that you do have a partner either soon or down the road, you need to be able to communicate what you need, what your body needs, which is not the same as it was when you were twenty, and it's not even the same as it was when you were forty. You're in a different body now and you need to get to know that what brings you pleasure, what kind of touch do you need, what kind of accelerator to your arousal, such as vibrators, is uh important to you for getting where you want to go. And and so to pleasure yourself, to get in touch with your own physicality, to accept your body at this time of life. So many seniors say to me, But I'm so old, how can I show my body, this old thing, to a new partner? Um, the new partner will just go, What? That old thing? No, come on, put that away. No, no, no, no, that's not how it works. You need to accept your own body first and then proudly be able to say to someone, This is how my body works, this is what I need.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_05And it it's not dictating to a partner, it's giving the gift of knowing how to please you. Because any new partner that you want to be with will want that.
SPEAKER_07Yeah. And that leads me directly into my next uh question, uh Joan, uh confidence, right? So let's talk about confidence. You know, as you said, bodies change, health changes, medication, menopause, prostate issues, mobility, pain, all of that, right? Yeah, is real, real uh stuff. How can older adults approach intimacy then without feeling embarrassed about their bodies?
SPEAKER_05How you feel about your body is often based on what society has thrown at you. And we as seniors have already said no to so many notions over the years of what we should be, how we should act, what we should think. You know, if you think about it, going from teenager to now, how many things have we said no that does not serve me now? That might have been okay growing up, or maybe it never was, but it isn't now. It doesn't serve me now. And to look at, well, if I think my body isn't desirable, where did that idea come from? Well it wasn't my body saying, Oh, hello, I'm not desirable anymore, go away, don't touch me. No, your body is not saying that to you at all. My body, your body is saying, please, please come closer. So we need to look at if if society said only young people deserve sexual pleasure, we can say no to that. Nope, nope, nope, not true.
SPEAKER_07I love it, I love it. And that's the message I think a lot of folks really, really uh need to hear because, yeah, the body may be changing, but it's not something that we should or need to apologize for at all, in my opinion, and what I've learned from you. Let's talk about couples right now, right? For couples who have been together, Joan, for many years, sometimes the love is still there, but the spark has shifted somewhat, right? What can couples do when they feel like roommates rather than romantic partners?
SPEAKER_05There's so many things to do. Of course, getting help from a professional if you're at an impasse is is crucial. But if you're not at an impasse exactly, you just haven't really talked about it because it's so hard to talk. You go on doing the things you've always done, they don't work anymore, and you figure, well, what do I expect? I'm old. Well, no, no, instead of that, what would work better? Am I putting off sex or not not inviting sex with my partner because I don't want sex or because I don't want the kind of sex we've been having. So what is it that we would like now? There's so many so many ways you can come at this. Uh one is I um I'm fortunate enough to be the niece of the the psychotherapist Larry Lachan, who died at age 100 a couple of years ago, and he used to tell me the key to a successful long-term uh marriage, and he was married 58 years. He said the key to it is surprise each other every day. That was his key. My key that I've been teaching people is to create uh rituals and fun games to bring the joy back into sexual negotiation. You know, it's hard to think of, oh my gosh, what he's been doing with me doesn't work now, I have to tell him, no, don't do that, do this instead. That's really fraught with anxiety for me, for him. If instead of that you're thinking, wait, what can we do to make this fun again? And I'm I'm sure if any of your uh listeners have followed my work at all, you've been aware that in articles in the New York Times and the Ask Joan movie that's uh in production now that will come out very soon in uh other articles that have been written about me, Modern Love uh podcast. I've been so fortunate to to have my work uh uh blasted sort of over the media in the last year. Uh but one of the things I talk about is, for example, ring the bell. That we have my partner and I have a bell. It's a very clangy, loud bell. And when we have scheduled a sex date and he is in another room waiting for me to be ready, when I'm ready, I ring the bell. Clang, clang, clang, clang, and he comes running at Pavlovian response. Yes, yes, yes, I'm ready. I hear the bell. Um that's one thing, it makes it fun. Um, another fun thing is uh games we play. We um we we sing 60 songs to each other and 50 songs to each other. And amazingly, if we can't remember our appointments for tomorrow, we can remember the words to a song that came out in 1958. How do we do that? But it makes us laugh. One of us will start a song, the other will continue it. I had no idea I remembered that song, but here it is coming out of me somehow. And it's just ways to be close, to be intimate, to laugh about shared experiences, and to welcome each other's pleasure.
SPEAKER_07Yeah, and it's so practical what you are sharing or with us, Joan, because long-term love sometimes, you know, needs a new conversation, not a new person. Oh, yes. You know, and and you're giving us uh some some some nuggets there. So thank you, thank you, thank you. But you know, communication can be hard, you know, at any age, but especially around intimacy, no matter what age you are, really. What are some gentle ways to say, I miss closeness or I need something different without making your partner feel, you know, ashamed or blamed?
SPEAKER_05Yes. Well, one way is especially with that second um section that you said, because that's very important, um when the old ways don't work the way they did before and you haven't been able to talk about it, is to say something like, I know I always used to like, for example, having my breasts touched, but now my breasts are more sensitive, my body is changing, and I'd love to share with you ways I would like to be I'd like to try being touched now and to say, Would you go on a journey of exploration with me and find out what might work better? Or to say, in my solo pleasuring, which you shouldn't be ashamed of, okay, in my solo pleasuring I've discovered that I can climax much more easily if we use a vibrator while we are making love. Could we try that next time? Can I introduce you to my favorite? Can we see if it might work on you too?
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_05Make it fun, make it exploration, make it an adventure. Haven't would you like to go on an adventure with me?
SPEAKER_07Folks, we are talking with Joan Price. You can follow Joan Price at Joanprice.com. That's www.joanprice.com. Joan, a few more questions for you. You mentioned your documentary, your movie coming out, uh, which puts senior sexuality right in the open. You know, it's just it's there, right? It's going to be right there. Why is it important for this story to be told visually, not just in books or columns?
SPEAKER_05I'm tired of being invisible. I'm tired of having our whole senior population invisible as sexual beings. So my whole work for so far, 21 years and counting, um is to be visible. I'm not saying I'm putting myself and a naked body up on the internet for everyone. No, I don't do that. What I do is educate and invite people to enjoy their own sexuality, sensuality, wherever they are in life right now, whatever works and doesn't work. And what the movie is about is uh I I'm so honored to be the subject of this. It's a documentary and it's about my life. The filmmakers, wonderful filmmakers, so talented, followed me around for three days each, one year the following year, um, and then the third year they came back for a special occasion. And uh in in doing this film and having many, many, many hours of footage, which is reduced to 28 minutes. I know, a short documentary. Um, it's saying uh it's saying them some things to the world. It's saying we own our sexuality. We don't have to. Uh sex doesn't have an expiration date. Sensuality doesn't. Creative aging doesn't have an expiration date. That's one of the big things. It's not all about sex. It's some about sex, it's some about intimacy, it's some about my work, some about my personal life. But it's also about the other things I do. Um, teaching line dancing, hiking with my partner. Um so many different parts of my life were filmed and I was interviewed along the way talking about what all these things mean to me. And I'm just so uh I'm so thrilled that people will get to see one, that sex doesn't have an arbitrary date where we say, okay, we're done, it's over, but also some of the ways we can live our whole lives creatively, not just this narrow part about sex, but but also just the way we live. Day-to-day.
SPEAKER_07Yeah. Sean, I want to ask this question because I do think it's important. And for our listeners who are hearing of you for the first time, and I think age matters in this conversation. Do you mind sharing your age with our listeners?
SPEAKER_05Of course not. 82 and three-quarters.
SPEAKER_0780 plus year old woman. And so I think that's important. I wanted to give perspective for our listeners out there. And I think when we see this documentary, ask Joan, that it's going to free people, I think. Knowing you over the years, now I think it's going to be liberating. I think it's going to give people permission to stop hiding behind whatever it is they're hiding behind, right? You know, and just come out with it. Joan, we are nearly out of time, my friend. My last question for you uh for the person listening right now, who wants love, who wants touch, pleasure, companionship, or just the courage to talk about it, what would you say to them today?
SPEAKER_05Get your education. In other words, find out what valid information is available to you so you know how aging affects relationships, affects sexuality, affects all these things. Um certainly follow my word, is what I would selfishly say. Naked at our age, talking out loud about senior sex is a class my classic book, which got reissued on its 15th birthday. Oh my gosh, in 2026. And also if you are if you have lost a partner in my book, Sex After Grief, navigating your sexuality after losing your beloved, I have webinars, I write an advice column for seniorplanet.org. If you go to joanprice.com and subscribe to my newsletter, poke around in there, read my blog post, see what else is out there. I'm not the only one doing this work. I'm really loud about it.
SPEAKER_07Well, I think that's a good idea. So I get to be on your show. Well, I think you are the one to follow. Uh folks, subscribe to this one here. Uh it is not a waste of your time. It's an investment, you know, uh, that you're making in joanprice.com. Joan, we're out of time. I want to thank you for bringing honesty, humor, as well as humanity to a topic that too often just gets pushed in the shadows. And family, remember, intimacy after 50 is not about trying to go backwards, it's about understanding your body, honoring your needs, communicating clearly, and remembering that closeness, affection, and joy, they still belong to you. You can learn more about Joan Price, her books, her newsletter, and the upcoming Ash Joan documentary through her website and online platforms. Just go to JoanPrice.com. Folks, you're listening to the Senior Zone. I'm your host, Sean Perry. Joan Price, thank you, my friend. Thank you. I look forward to having you back here soon. Folks, this next break is brought to you by Compassion and Choices, empowering everyone to chart their own end-of-life journey. We'll be right back.
SPEAKER_11Today is your day to connect with AARP in DC. AARP is here in the District of Columbia working hard to make it an even better place to live, work, and play for people of all ages, and you can help. Put your skills and talents to good use as an AARP volunteer where you can help lead local events or become an advocate for the issues that matter in your community, like funding for programs that help district residents age with dignity and independence. AARP is also helping you get the most out of life. Check out their educational workshops where they can help you grow as a caregiver, find a job, and teach you about the latest technology, or enjoy a night out at any of their exciting local events, like their happy hours and free movie screenings. Today is your day to connect with your community and with AARP. So let's take on today and every day. Learn more at aarp.org slash DC.
SPEAKER_02Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday.
Birthdays of the Week
SPEAKER_07Today, Monday, August 17th from Baltimore, Maryland. Happy birthday, Kim. Hey, this one goes back. This is my best friend here, Carl D. Griffin, 67. Today, August 17th from Warner Robbins, Georgia. Happy, happy birthday, my friend. Mildred Jones Nick, 75. Tomorrow, Tuesday, August 18th, from Shadyside, Maryland. Happy birthday, Mildred, Yolanda Burks Brown, the Big 60, 60 years young on Tuesday, August 18th from Kansas City, Missouri. Happy birthday, Yolanda. Erlene Smith McClain, 75. She is one of our most faithful listeners and supporters. Happy birthday, Erlen. You turn 75 on Wednesday, August 19th, hailing from Washington, D.C. Alvin Nadab is 70 years young on Thursday, August 20th from Washington, D.C. Happy birthday, Alvin. Warren Allen, my good buddy here, 65 Medicare Eligible on Friday, August 21st from Alexandria, Virginia. Happy, happy birthday, Warren, Linda Popejoy, 59 on Saturday, August 22nd from Washington, D.C. Happy birthday, Linda. This one is special. It's me, Sean Perry 63. That's right. Yours truly, turning 63 on Saturday, August 22nd. I'm still standing. I'm still serving. I am still grateful for every step along the way. And last but not least, Anthony Floyd, 75 on Sunday, August 23rd from Orlando, Florida. Happy birthday, Anthony, and to everyone celebrating a birthday this week again. We honor you. We appreciate you and we wish you continued health, happiness, and many more reasons to celebrate. Family,
Dear Grave Woman featuring Joelle Simon
SPEAKER_07birthdays give us an opportunity to celebrate life and the blessing of another year. But life after 50 always includes change, grief, remembrance, healing, and the wisdom we gain from everything that we have lived through. And sometimes the healthiest thing we can do is slow down long enough to acknowledge what our hearts are carrying. So let's turn now to this week's Dear Grave Woman, featuring Joelle Simone. Joelle, the mic is yours, my friend.
SPEAKER_01Hello everyone, and welcome back to Dear Grave Woman. I am your host, Joelle Simone. I'm known all over the world as the Grave Woman. And this is your three-minute segment here on the Senior Zone, where we talk about everything from life, death, grief, pre-planning for the end, and everything in between. Today I am wanting to share a little bit about a little bit more about the black funeral home business and something that I'm referring to as the hidden mentorship pipeline. And so, like many other deathcare professionals, particularly funeral directors and embalmers, I have had the honor of being mentored by funeral professionals throughout my life and career. The first being my uncle Mark, who was not only my first mentor, but my introduction into the deathcare industry. And so I'm sharing this today because I know many of you out there have grandchildren, you have children, nieces, nephews, or other community members. And I think it's important that we as a community start looking back to the funeral home, particularly our funeral homes, as not only a place where we go to bury our dead, but look at it as a pipeline for mentorship, whether your loved one or young person that you know wants to be involved in the industry or not. And the reason I want to focus on the funeral home is because it's one of the least discussed legacies in our communities. It isn't, you know, necessarily a bank that we turn to in our community for professionals that look like us and have the position to bring us in and mentor us. It's not normally a hospital, but in many cases, for many individuals, it has been the funeral home. And the reason that the funeral home is so important and serves as a mentorship pipeline is because number one, it's a cultural classroom. Black funeral homes have always functioned as more than businesses. They're training grounds, their apprenticeship spaces. Historically, they've been locations for civil rights activities, and mentorship in black funeral service is never just technical. It's cultural, it's where we learn how to talk and communicate not only with families but members of our communities, and it's where we learn how to carry ourselves with dignity when emotions and grief are high. Number two, mentorship, especially for those within the pipeline in the funeral home, whether it goes into the industry or outside of the industry, ensures a level of continuity for community funeral homes, which are a lot of times staples in our community. And last but not least, it gives the opportunity for professionals like myself and those who have poured into me and so many other deathcare professionals to pay it forward. It's about legacy and planting seeds in our community that continue to grow in our community. Thank you so much for allowing me to share. And Sean, back to you for the later life lowdown.
SPEAKER_07Thank
Later Life Lowdown
SPEAKER_07you, thank you, Joel Family. That is a reminder that healing does not always mean forgetting, and moving forward does not mean leaving the people or experiences we love behind. Sometimes it simply means learning how to carry the memory with greater peace, giving ourselves permission to feel what we feel, and remaining open to the life, love, and joy that may still be ahead for us. Now, family, part of aging well is remaining informed, connected, and prepared, and knowing where to go when you or someone you love needs help. So now let's move into this week's later life lowdown. First up in Washington, D.C., the DC Department of Aging and Community Living offers its safe at home program, which provides eligible older adults and adults with disabilities with in-home safety adaptations designed to reduce the risk of falls. For more information or help applying, call 202-724-5626. That's 202-724-5626 or visit dACL.dc.gov. Remember, family, the best time to address a safety hazard is before someone gets hurt. In Maryland, the Maryland Access Point connects older adults, adults with disabilities, and family caregivers with programs and services available in their communities that may include things like transportation, meal programs, caregiver support, housing assistance, in-home services, and other resources that can help make someone remain safe and independent. To learn more about the Maryland Access Point and find the resources that you may need, call 844-627-5465. That's 844-627-5465. Or you can visit Marylandaccesspoint.info. INFO. You do not need to know the name or the program you need. Simply explain your situation and allow the specialist to help point you in the right direction. Now in Northern Virginia, the Fairfax Area Agency on Aging, they're offering a free virtual caregiver webinar called What It Means to Be Brain Healthy. It's this Wednesday, August 19th from 12 noon until 1 p.m. The webinar will share practical information about protecting and supporting brain health as we age. Participants may join by computer or by telephone. To register, visit fairfaxcounty.gov and search for Caregiver Webinars, or you may call 703-324-7948. That's 703-324-7948. Well, folks, that's this week's Later Life Lowdown, keeping you informed, connected, and prepared for the road ahead.
Final Reflection and Closing
SPEAKER_07And family, the pencil broke, that is all she wrote. Today, we talked about caring for ourselves in ways that are both practical and deeply personal, from protecting our oral health to speaking honestly about intimacy, companionship, and connection after 50. And through our birthdays, Joelle's reflections, and the resources we shared, we were reminded that every chapter of life deserves to be lived with dignity, honesty, and hope. Family, growing older does not make our needs, our feelings, or our desire for connection any less important. Whether it is caring for our health, becoming more comfortable with our changing bodies, or remaining open to affection, companionship, and joy, we still deserve to live fully and honestly at every age. So thank you for spending another Monday morning with us and thank you to everyone who continues to support the work of the Senior Zone. And remember, when you cannot join us live or when you hear a conversation that someone else needs, you can find the Senior Zone Podcast on demand through platforms like Spotify, Apple Podcasts, iHeartRadio, Amazon, Music, and many other major podcast platforms. Share today's show with someone who may need the information, the encouragement, or simply the reminder that life after 50 still comes with possibilities. So, folks, until we meet again, keep your head high, keep your heart full, and always be someone who makes someone else look forward to their tomorrow. Love you. Peace.
SPEAKER_09Be sure to join us on our next broadcast.
SPEAKER_04Until then, live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly, leave the rest to God.
SPEAKER_09Have a wonderful week, and God willing, the senior zone will be here for another informative and entertaining hour next Monday morning at 10 a.m.
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