What NO ONE Told Us About Childhood Disability & Alopecia

In this episode, we’re looking back at our childhoods and diving into everything we weren't prepared for while growing up with alopecia and spina bifida. 

From doctors giving us false hope with phrases like "just stop stressing" to hiding wheelchairs in Instagram photos just to fit in, we unpack the reality of navigating childhood with a physical difference. We chat about the lack of representation on TV, the awkwardness of being called "inspiring" when you just want a wig, and how "tough love" shaped who we are today. 

Grab a comfy drink, sit down with us, and let’s get candid! 

💬 Question for you: What is something you weren't prepared for while growing up? Let us know in the comments below!

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hello, sit down with us and get comfy.

SPEAKER_00 0:02

As today we're diving into what we weren't prepared for as children. And in next week's episode, we will be diving into what we weren't prepared for as adults. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:12

So come back for that if you want. Yeah, make sure to like, subscribe, and also comment what you weren't prepared for growing up. Yes. And um we may have some points that are similar for next week. So yeah, let's go into it. Let's get into it. Let's go. I think first and foremost, as a child, growing up with a difference, when I first found out about my alopecia, I think it was the sense of false hope. Like the thought that because I was literally told that I've said before that I was told by the doctor that if I stop stressing, my hair will grow back. So I was tried and tried and tried to stop stressing, and it's like when you're told not to press the red button, and you like press the red button. I think to me it's like how stressed can you be as a child? Right? Do you know what I mean? I was like, I don't understand how my hair loss is due to stress because I didn't feel stressed. Like, I'm sorry, SATS is not that stressful. No, like it wasn't that stressful for me as a child, like I'm not entirely sure where the stress came from, but that's what the doctor did put it down to. But he also did say, like, if you stop stressing, your hair will go back. But then I ended up stressing about not stressing.

SPEAKER_00 1:16

Oh, yeah, it's like that red button that you're saying.

SPEAKER_01 1:20

So I was just stressing even more and then worrying even more and then checking my hair even more if more hair had fallen out. But then I got this sense of false hope thinking that when I did have some regrowth, I was like, Oh great, my hair's growing back. Not stressing, and then it would fall out again. And then, oh, we had a new serum to try, maybe that'll help my hair grow back. No. So that I think for me as a child, it was a sense of false hope because you're so innocent as well, and you think everything's gonna be okay, you're gonna be cured. Which let me reiterate, there's no cure for alopecia, just treatments that can help.

SPEAKER_00 1:51

Um I think similarly with me, there was this always a sense of false hope. So growing up, I always went to loads of different physios, I did multiple surgeries. Don't get me wrong, the surgeries were needed because at one point to not do it to not really paint a graphic picture, but like my spine was quite literally open. So surgeries were needed. Um, I am gonna get into my diagnosis and like the whole surgeries thing in a future episode when we talk more in depth about spina bifida and my journey with it. But um, I think there was a sense of false hope in the sense of going to loads of different uh physios, uh physio in water, there is a word for it, hydro. Hydrotherapy, hydrotherapy. There you go. Tell your mum's a nurse. I know, right? Yeah, so hydro she'll be proud, Angelo will be proud. She would be proud, little mum. Um so yeah, so and I think obviously all not all those kind of led to anything, but also I think there was always a false sense of false hope that all this is gonna lead you to being able to walk and like run and all that jazz, and there was always that as an end goal, whereas I think that's what gave me a false hope that this isn't forever, and for most people it's not, and disability can look different for multiple people, whether you have the same disability or not. So I think, yeah, that was a false hope for me growing up.

SPEAKER_01 3:20

But I think that was like definitely the main kind of thing as a child, because you just as a child, you just want things to get better, yeah. Like if you're upset, you know you're gonna get better, if you're unwell, you know you're gonna get better. Like that's what you see in all the Disney films, like that you always want a happy ending as a child. So when you don't get the happy ending you want, it's like, well, what hope have I got to hold on to? That sounds so deep.

SPEAKER_00 3:42

No, no, but it's true, and I think part of that as well is not having someone with the same disability as you and not seeing it around you, I hate to say it, but you all you're almost like that's normal. This isn't. I'm not normal. So what I'm working towards is to become normal to Yeah. Yeah. And I think that also creates a false hope that, but whereas what you should be doing, obviously not as a child because that's way too young, but like what it should be installed in you is that it's okay to be different, yeah. And this might be it, but it's just the ways of like coping with it rather than giving you false hope.

SPEAKER_01 4:27

Yeah, you know what? My um I guess she's like my sister-in-law, even though I'm not married, we're like sister-in-law, yeah, basically just another big sister, and but her she tells her daughter all the time that like if you are called weird, it's a good thing. Like, don't think that's a bad thing to be weird, like it's good, like it's good to be a bit weird and a bit quirky, and like I love that value she's already adopted in the daughter, so young as well. Because kids can be weird because you're learning what you like and what you don't like, yeah. But then a child saying it to another child is like negative, yeah, and it can be weird, it can like really change your likes and dislikes from such a young age. So I loved that. It just came to mind just like as we're talking about false home, it's almost like owning what you're like and who you are, and your dislikes and your likes, and it's like my sister, for example, she loved she'll hate me for saying this, she was obsessed with my little ponies for such a long time until I think it was called like she was got called childish or something when she got to high school and she was like, Oh, I want them all out of my room. No, and then she like with all the friends she made, it's like a 180 of like of the things that she then started liking.

SPEAKER_00 5:38

Oh no, yeah. I think we've all all had that stage in life where like we pretend to like something because like because of the crowd. Yeah, right now I can't think what mine was.

SPEAKER_01 5:49

I actually I have like a like a core memory. I was in year two of primary school, and we were talking about programmes that we watch on Disney or T or TV or whatever. So now some people were saying like friends, and I was like, What's friends? Like, I'm just gonna do it. I didn't even know you were friends at high school. I wasn't no, I'm thinking primary school. Oh, like I didn't even know that. No, and I said lazy town. Oh my gosh, but I was obsessed with it. Like because they were dancing and singing, and I was like dancing all the time. I was like, lazy, I was like, lazy lazy town. You could be the girl, and the whole could you I need to get a pink wig, but at the same time, the whole class were like started laughing, and I was like, wait, am I weird? Like why like am I is this not good? Yeah, that's weird. Why were they laughing? Do you know what I mean? Yeah, it's just what you're into. So that so after that, I was like, I guess kept it a secret. Lazy town, guilty pleasure. It actually was sportics. I'm sorry, how could you not like sports? Like, I want to be able to. I'm sorry, but he was fit.

SPEAKER_00 6:53

Like all the the push-ups, the push-ups, and like the okay, this has clear. Anyway, back to regulation, back to the pod. And I think naturally when it came to things like talking about favourite TV shows and things like that and not quite fitting in, I also felt like sometimes I had to hide my disability. And I don't know, everyone's thinking, you are literally in a wheelchair, like what how exactly can you hide that? And you'd be surprised. So basically growing up, because I'd never had anyone uh who wasn't a who was disabled, I mean I did go to a specialist school and I d w my first other best friend was oh who oh my god, I can't speak. You can, you're good. My first best friend also has a physical disability, but aside from that, when I was first growing up and a little bit after that, there was no real representation of it, especially like online or like within the media, and obviously at that age it wasn't really online. No, obviously, but when I came to going online, so I had my first Facebook at 13. Me. I don't know if you're allowed to you were allowed to 13 was the age at the time. Okay, thank god I'm not breaking any laws. But yeah, I had my first Facebook at 13, and I think I had Instagram when I was like 15. Anyway, I remember posting my pictures on Facebook and Instagram, and I naturally felt like I had to get out of my chair, like my pe my chair wasn't normal. So, like in every my every one of my pictures, you can go back, I think I've deleted most of it, but I'm like either sat on a step or like trying to stand up because like I can stand up when I'm when I've got help and all that jazz. And I think had I had the representation, I would have been like, for example, if someone on Lazy Town wasn't a wheelchair, yeah. Do you know what I mean? Wait, is there I feel like there is why do I feel like someone was signing a wheelchair? Was he yeah, but I don't know why that didn't transpire in my head.

SPEAKER_01 9:04

Because you're look- it's because you the like focus on Stephanie, is it's her name Stephanie, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:10

Is it? I think so. But also that's just like one side character. Yeah. And that's just one TV show, yeah. He's never a main character. I no. I don't think there was another TV show as a child that I watched and I thought, oh, they're in a wheelchair. There wasn't. No. If there was, let us know.

SPEAKER_01 9:28

If the if you watched something growing up and there was actual physical disabilities on there, I think there was, there was in The Simpsons, but it was a joke. I never grew up. There was a joke. Yeah. What? What do you mean? I think they made a lot of jokes about it.

SPEAKER_00 9:45

Oh, maybe as well as in um Family Guy. Yeah. Worst worse in Family Guy. Yeah. But like growing up, I just never I never saw that. So I was like, okay then, so my chair is not me, essentially.

SPEAKER_01 9:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:59

So I'm just gonna leave it where it is, out of the picture. And yeah, and I think that kind of also led me to not accept it sooner in life.

SPEAKER_01 10:10

I think that's definitely the same for me. Like, I struggle to accept like that I was going bold and that my hair was falling out. I just didn't want to see it, I didn't want to accept that.

SPEAKER_00 10:18

No.

SPEAKER_01 10:19

Like, I'd get annoyed the fact that my hair was falling out, and all I wanted was just to be normal. And realistically, what is normal? Literally what is as a kid, like or a young teenager, normal is just fitting in. Yeah. Like normal is being like everybody else and liking what everybody else likes.

SPEAKER_00 10:34

And like not having hair is like that's not normal because like no one else.

SPEAKER_01 10:38

And that's exactly how I felt. Like, I was like, no one looks like me, I'm not normal. No, but what instead of seeing it as unique, I saw it as like something to be shame, like ashamed of and like to hide. So that's what stemmed me to like get wigs, and then the wigs were like my hair. So people would say, Oh, have you dyed your hair? Yes. Yes, that's exactly what it is. It's not a new wig, same time as last year. It is what copper copper blonde by Tresme. Did you ask your foot people? Yeah. That's quite cool. Oh, yeah. I went, I remember going to school at like year 10, and I had a wig gifted from Little Princess Trust. My hair was my hair at the time. No one knew at that point. Well, I'll get into the more story of who knew when I was um I know, like, let's leave my curious. But so I'll there is a story, many stories in high school that I'm only like ready to talk about now with what happened. But there was one instance where there was a point where a few of my classes knew through choice through choice of my own. Yeah. And one person in that class with a new wig that I had literally said, Oh, I'm so happy for you, your hair's growing back. It hadn't, it was just a better it was just a better wig. But at the time, like she was happy for me thinking that it was my own hair, and I with this wig. I mean, it's a it's a sweet comment, but also but to be fair, that's what I wanted to hear at the time. Because like I wanted hair, you know. Yeah, and you wanted it to look obviously real. Yeah, so the fact with this wig that I had from Little Princess Trust, it was one that like stuck to my head. One of my favourite wigs at the time. I've had like new favourite wigs now, actually, but um up to that date that was my favourite wig. Human hair stuck to my head. I could dance in it, swim in it, sleep in it, could do everything with it. Very they're literally the wigs that Little Princess no Little Princess Trust do and Little Ladylogs do. It's two different charities, very similar. Um just have different ways of helping children. But they um yeah, that was my moment where I was like, oh, fitting in finally. Like it's not it doesn't look like a wig anymore, it looks like normal hair. No. So like that comment was like, oh, I look like everyone else finally.

SPEAKER_00 12:47

I think for me, that fitting in moment it's just gonna sound really stupid. But maybe you get it if you're in a wheelchair. But for me, it was when people found it cool that I can do like wheelies and stuff. I remember in primary school, and a little bit in at the start of high school, but like in primary school, like people were like so curious. Obviously, naturally, I'm I was literally the only kid with a physical disability at that point. Uh, and in the wheelchair, and I remember they were like, Oh, can you do this? Can you do that? And like I used to like do wheelies, and like everyone would gather around me, and I was like, Oh my god, this is so cool! I'm getting the attention I deserve that joking, but yeah, it kind of was like, I don't have to hide this. Yeah, that was that for me, and I think there was one point where I felt really bad for him pressing. So I used to have both a wheelchair, obviously, and crutches at school, like my crutches were just left at school, and this kid, one of these guys, like in my school, tried it on, tried my crutches, and he actually broke it. But like I this is gonna sound really bad, but I like the I like the attention that my disability was bringing. So like I like the fact that he was trying it, like joking about it.

SPEAKER_01 13:59

I think it's because it's like positive attention, yeah. Like twistly, it feels like you're making friends, like it was nice curiosity, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:04

Yeah, so and then when he got in trouble, I was actually really sad for him because I was like, I'm actually finding this offensive, like I don't care about like But he did break it, bless him. Bless him, but no, yeah. I think yeah, have like having positive attention was definitely a good thing in my yeah, life then. Yeah, I agree.

SPEAKER_01 14:26

Anyway, I'm excited for our high school.

SPEAKER_00 14:28

I am absolutely I'm nervous, but I'm I'm scared.

SPEAKER_01 14:33

September, no. That's next month. We're talking about high school in next month. Yeah, August.

SPEAKER_00 14:37

August. I cannot believe July's fine by guys. Also, if you're in the UK, are you okay? Because what's going on with this weather?

SPEAKER_01 14:46

It was 22 degrees the other day. 22? Yeah, it was like in the morning. I went out in a jacket. I was like, this is this is like we're getting to spoil. Yeah. Like back in April, 22. Lost night. I thought as a ginger I would have climatised, and I'm literally like we are climatised, guys, and I'm I'm afraid.

SPEAKER_00 15:03

I'm wearing jeans and it's like what 26 degrees? Am I well? I I just think this winter's gonna hit hard. This winter is gonna be hard to do.

SPEAKER_01 15:13

I said that to my partner last the other night. I said, winter's gonna be brutal. Yeah. Like we're gonna be freezing. But at the same time, it's kind of weird, but I feel like we're gonna have a white winter this year. I hope so. I do think so. But then it's worrying me because it's like defo climate change.

SPEAKER_00 15:28

Well, obviously. Babe, we've been having 30 degree weather in the year for the past three weeks.

SPEAKER_01 15:33

But like, because we've had with like it's been so intense for summer, like to the extreme.

SPEAKER_00 15:38

That's what I makes.

SPEAKER_01 15:40

I think it's gonna be the exact same. Uh that's what makes me. But I think it'll hit in January, February. We've never had snow in December, not for a long time.

SPEAKER_00 15:46

We did one, yeah. I think it was like on Boxing Day. I remember like Boxing Day a few years ago. Like, I think it was like through COVID. And I think one thing that really stuck by me throughout my childhood when it came to my disability was how I was treated and how adults around me and just in my life, acted when it came to my disability. Um, like because like on one hand I had the whole like being treated like I was in a c what's the what's the saying, like crystal glass or whatever? Like I was like I was too precious, too delicate.

SPEAKER_01 16:23

Yeah, I can't think of the saying, but I know what you mean.

SPEAKER_00 16:26

Yeah, let us know if you know what we're talking about. We clearly don't. Like treating us if you were gonna break. Yeah, yeah, that's the word. And but on the other hand, I had a lot of tough love. Like I said, for example, like people like being pushed to like doing XYZ physio, doing this, doing that. So I think what I I think at the time when I was going through it, I just thought like this is this is normal, like this is how I'm supposed to act to it as well. But what as an adult, again, we're gonna deepen dive into this more in next week's episode, but as an adult, it's made me realise how some of those reactions were actually quite harmful and unnecessary, and like certain things that happened, um not like anything deep or anything like that, but like certain things that kind of uh I'm trying to use words that I don't know at the top of my head, but like certain things that like affected me subconsciously going up, if that makes sense. Yeah. And I think, yeah, and I think what this is why I like when there's more awareness with things like this, because adults are learning as well. Like, don't like for example, my parents had zero experience with a child or anyone with needs, special needs, or like a physical disability and all that jazz that came with me being born. And with things like social media and like awareness within like TV media, I can see a lot of people commenting who are parents to people with difference and disabilities being like, oh my god, like I didn't know this, I appreciate this, like this is how I'm gonna navigate this, and it's it's a learning curve at the end of the day.

SPEAKER_01 18:11

But I think as well with adults, it's like they're experiencing everything for the first time as well. Yeah, exactly. So they just do what they think is the right 100%. So it's like the tough love as much as they think like it's helping you, sometimes it's like out of touch tough love. Yes, like it's it's tough love to an extent, but it's not respectful sometimes. No, but again, like if you've watched the recent podcast with Brie Addams, but she was adopted and her adopted parents basically had um certain view because just because of their religion and everyone had to work to like earn the place basically and all their children had chores to do and would get their pocket money, and Brie, her chore was to basically travel up and down the stairs 20 times in 20 minutes.

SPEAKER_00 19:00

And if you don't know who Brie is, she basically has a limb difference, I think that's what they call her.

SPEAKER_01 19:07

Yeah, her tag her like Instagram tagline is literally no limbs. That's her using it. So she doesn't have any arms or legs. Yeah. And she is like a glorified makeup artist. She's married. She is absolutely incredible, and but she's put all her, I guess, successes and her independence down to that tough love.

SPEAKER_00 19:28

Really?

SPEAKER_01 19:29

Yeah, like she said, she said, I'm sure I swear she said as much as it was tough love, and the person that was like interviewing her on this podcast was shocked because it wasn't very motherly or called services type, I think. Yeah, but she took the approach of like I understand that, however, I wouldn't be this independent if I didn't have that. I guess that's actually a really takeaway from it. As much as tough love is great in some instances, it doesn't work for everyone.

SPEAKER_00 19:56

No, but I guess I think hearing that it kind of does resonate with me, like in the sense that I've always said, like in past episodes, that I wouldn't necessarily change anything growing up. I mean there's some things I would change, but like for the most part, especially when it came to my parents, I wouldn't change a thing. And I think that's what it comes down to. I think the tough love is what made me be the person I am today.

SPEAKER_01 20:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:22

And I'm happy with the person I am today. Call me big headed, but I'm actually happy with the person I am. You're allowed to say that, you know. I'm happy with the person I am today. Yeah. And someone actually called me level-headed the other day, and I was like, oh my god, that is such cute. I think someone that really knows me, and I was like, oh my god, that is actually a really sweet compliment. Because sometimes I'm like, I'm not level-headed. Sometimes I'm like, but it's nice to know that I come across that way.

SPEAKER_01 20:50

But that's good. I think if I could go back and change anything, it wouldn't be the way I was brought up, like parents-wise and family-wise, it would be like the people around like the external are like out of all of the family. So, like, not not even family, but how the public react. You know, and like awareness around that. So, for one thing, for me, I had no one to look up to that looked like me. Obviously, I looked up to my parents, I looked up to family, I looked up to friends, but in terms of someone of like a popular celebrity standard, there was no one I could like look up to as an influencer or to help when I wanted to know how to do my hair with with by covering my ball patches, how to do my eyebrows when I had only half, how to like do makeup when I had no like facial hair, like peach fuzz. Like everything was just like soaking off my face. Like it was that that I was like, I can't relate to missing, yeah. That I was missing.

SPEAKER_00 21:44

I think for me it was what I would change is my it's gonna sound weird, but my own perception of how my life would look. And I think growing up a Disney child. Disney child, a Disney kid, I was very much like I'm gonna grow up, I'm gonna have a child, I'm gonna have this, I'm gonna have my husband, and I think everyone does that. But what I was kind of naive to as a child is how in the way or how my disability was gonna affect those kind of hopes and dreams. It sounds really like sad in a way, I can say that, because saying it out loud might sound sad, but also on the other hand, there was parts of my adulthood, there was a part of my childhood where I was thinking, oh my god, like I can't, I won't be able to do this, I won't be able to like drive, I won't be able to go on an ITAR with my friends, and I am doing that. So it's like one of those where it's like the balance, but going back to kind of like the family aspects of things and things like that, it's only now that I'm at a certain age where I am thinking about those things that I'm like, okay, this is gonna look how does it look for you now? Yeah, and it's kind of coming to terms with a new reality, even though it's really weird because I'm coming across I'm coming in terms to a new reality, even though I've had this disability since I was born.

SPEAKER_01 23:12

But I would say it's because everything you soak in as a child is this like fairy glasses, yeah. So like naturally you would think that. Like I always believed my hair would grow back, yeah. Until it clearly didn't. Side note, still bald. But if you're not watching, if you're not watching, she's still bald, and um, but it's like for me, it was the fact that like me realising that I needed a wig that broke me. So it's like I was 12 when my mum was like, I think it's time to like look into wigs, and I literally cried. I was like, no, it's gonna flow off in the wind, it's gonna be like a cartoon character, like flapping. No, like I'm not doing it. And so it's so interesting as a 12-year-old, you didn't want that. I really didn't want it. That's so interesting. Whereas like 12-year-old, like a lot of children that I meet now, they like see the wigs that are being produced and being worn, and like they want a wig, but at the time, wigs were like a taboo subject. I feel like it was I felt like at the as my 12-year-old self, I thought wigs were for people that had cancer and they were that's the only image I had of wigs.

SPEAKER_00 24:17

I think that's what what some people still think.

SPEAKER_01 24:19

Oh yeah, like being very transparent as a 12-year-old, that's all I thought. Yeah, um, and so when I was then set told I need a wig, I was like, why? I don't have cancer. I I don't need a wig, like what are you on about? Like I wanted just to cover up what I had for thinking that my hair would grow back. And so when my mom approached that topic of like you need a wig now, the image of like my hair's gonna grow back, like faded drastically and like very quickly, and it started to just get me angry, and I got really frustrated at the fact that like I now have to rely on a wig. Yeah. When I had to then get a wig, what started to frustrate me already that young was people I didn't know calling me inspiring and inspirational when I was literally so frustrated with my situation.

SPEAKER_00 25:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:07

So this one incident, I was going to the dermatology, which is hilarious because people think hair loss is a skin condition or a cosmetic issue. It's not, it's actually your autoimmune system, it's just the way your body works. It's nothing really to do with like your hair. No, it's not a cosmetic or skin thing. Um like they will look at like your hair follicle and how like if it's if it's died or if it's still live like alive and will grow hair again. Um mine are dead. Um this other time. Still bald. Still bald. Mine is dead. Um mine are dead, um but went to this dermatologist, that was just where we led to at the time. And she basically took one look at me and just like and my bald patches and just started like crying. Like the dermatologist doctor woman.

SPEAKER_00 26:01

A medical professional, if you will.

SPEAKER_01 26:04

Just started crying, and she must have had a very tough day. Okay, must have had a very tough day. So there's me, my mum and dad in this room with this woman, and I swear she had like two student doctors with her or two student nurses with her as well. And she just kept saying, You're so inspirational, you should be really proud of how far you've come, like, I'm so sorry this has happened to you. And it was just kind of like at this point, I'd just gone to grips with the fact that I wanted a wig. Yeah, I was like, Can this gal stop? So she was kind of like trying to put you off a wig, not putting me off a wig, but just like telling me how amazing I am. As you are, but it was yeah, but it was something like basically just saying I'm so sorry for what you're going through and you're incredible. Almost like I've got so much resilience already. Okay. Of what I've been through, because it had been two years at this point, and I was like, thank you. Can I have my wig voucher now? Because that was the main reason we went. We had to. This is another thing as a kid, I felt like I had to jump through a lot of hoops to get answers. And it's still the same now, to be fair, and we'll get into that a lot next week. Yeah. Um, because you just realise more as an adult. 100%. But even then, being 12, I was realising that I couldn't just walk into a salon and say, I need a wig through the NHS, which isn't even a thing anymore, by the way. Was it ever a thing? Yeah, it was a thing. You could get one free wig every six months through the NHS and it stopped in 2016. I'm sorry, why? Clearly, clearly. They saw again, they saw it as a cosmetic thing, not a medical thing.

unknown 27:34

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 27:35

That's the belief that's why it stopped. That's the view I have as to why it stopped. Weird. Um I could be wrong. If I am wrong, let me know, but I'm sure that's what I do know as. So yeah, but basically, we went to this woman purely just to get this NHS wig voucher, and we ended up with no voucher. Me grabbing the car keys and walking my mum and dad out of the room into the car, and then we drove to alternative looking black pool and got myself a wig. That was like the whole being 12 years old, being told I'm inspiring, when I'm like, one, I'm 12 years old, like I don't feel like I'm inspiring anyone. I just want a wig, I want to be normal. That was the only thing I wanted as a child.

SPEAKER_00 28:17

I think one part about being called inspiring, especially as a child, is like I didn't ask for my hair to fall out. Well, you, not me. Yeah. And you didn't it wasn't like you set out to be inspirational, like it just happened. So you do know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 28:35

But I think as well, I wasn't prepared for that comment as a child, and I wasn't prepared that that comment would then follow me throughout my life. Yeah. But I keep having like different views on this as well, because like I do want to be inspiring and inspire other people to do that. When I'm actually being inspiring, like not when I'm in Tesco's getting a Tesco meal deal, you know. No, not when no, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 28:57

Towards that then, not yet, no, not yeah, no, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 29:00

But I think as well, we're gonna talk about next week on how we were not prepared for how many hoops we have to dive through. Yes, and especially when it comes to like the general public and coming out of that kind of childhood world, and like being almost like being forced to mature so young.

SPEAKER_00 29:19

Definitely, yeah. And I think for me it's like the way I would describe it is like the rose tinted glasses are going on top of your head. Yeah. Like sometimes just want to put them back on just to like be ignorant to everything that's like wrong with the world. But no, they're on pretty much on my head now.

SPEAKER_01 29:34

But what we are going to talk about next week, just as a little teaser for you, is actually a very popular place in Manchester Town Centre that when they opened they were a little bit discriminatory.

SPEAKER_00 29:44

Refusing entry and all that jazz. Well, we'll see. We'll end it there. Yeah, because otherwise I will. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 29:52

So yeah, anyway, thank you so much for listening and we'll see you next week. Bye.