Feeding the Family | Angela Kruse | Emily Free

Welcome to the Stronger Families Podcast!

What does it actually take to build a family that thrives — not just survives? In this episode, hosts Emily Free and Angela Kruse sit down to talk about how to feed the fam and bring intentionality back to the dinner table.

Together, they dive into why mealtime is about so much more than just the food on the plate. It's a built-in space to teach structure, active listening, and healthy communication. Angela shares her practical, stress-free strategy for meal planning (including her note-section hack) and how to handle crazy extracurricular schedules without sacrificing nutrition. They also tackle the great "kids table" debate and give real-talk advice on navigating picky eaters, snacks, and the power of a simple nightly check-in question.

This isn't about arriving or having it all figured out. It's about taking the very next step the Lord is inviting you into — and watching it bear fruit.
Weekly Challenge: Have a conversation with your spouse to set your family guidelines for mealtime. What are the rules you're going to stand firm on, and where can you add one or two steps of intentionality (like adding a veggie or a fun table question) this week?

Whether you're in a season of joy or struggle, this podcast is for families who want more — more richness, more delight, more of what God designed family to be.

Let's build stronger families together.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

We get to show our kids what it looks like to have a healthy relationship with food. We also get to show them what it looks like to have healthy relational aspect around mealtime.

SPEAKER_00 0:14

Welcome to the Stronger Families Podcast, where we believe that strong families produce strong cultures. I'm Emily Free, one of your hosts, and today you're gonna hear from real people with real stories and God-centered wisdom to help strengthen your family. Whatever season you're in, we believe that this is gonna encourage you. So let's build stronger families together. Welcome back to the Stronger Families Podcast. Yep. Angela here. I'm not Angela, this is Angela. Me. I am Emily. I am Angla. I am hosting today the wonderful Angela Cruzy. Angela. What's your middle name? Justine. Justine. Thank you. AJ. AJ. We're gonna call her AJ. It was AJ for a long time. I think this will be the most unhinged podcast because our husbands are not here to keep us in line. And so we'll see what happens. Party. Today we're talking about how to feed the fam. Feeding the fam. Feed the fam. We're talking about mealtime. Yep. I remember I I've struggled with this a lot. Yeah. And there was a time we actually a few years ago we had a snowstorm coming, and one of my close friends texted me prior and was like, hey, I'm just making sure that you have more than LaCroix and noodles in your pantry. How dare you? And no, I don't. Yeah. Okay. I felt very sane in that moment though, because I I'm just I'm not skilled. Or I used to say, right? This is my gift. You had to grow. You've got to grow in your intentionality. Well, because then came the children and it's like they have to eat and somebody's got to feed them.

SPEAKER_01 1:48

Every meal time. Every mealtime. And snacks in between. It's a full-time job.

SPEAKER_00 1:53

Snacks are alive. It is. Snacks are alive.

SPEAKER_01 1:55

They love it.

SPEAKER_00 1:56

Um, so yeah, I think I would love to start with the question just why why do we have intentionality between between behind mealtime? Yeah. Like what does that look like? Why is that important? Yes. Um, just yeah, what are your overall thoughts?

SPEAKER_01 2:12

There, I mean, there's so much behind this. And I think one of the big things that we talked about is we get to show our kids what it looks like to have a healthy relationship with food. Yeah. We also get to show them what it looks like to have a healthy relational aspect around mealtime. And how is that going to look like? Because it's so much more than even food in these mealtimes. Yeah. We're teaching structure, we're teaching, we're having conversation around our dinner table. We are, you know, no, we take turns, we listen actively. Like we're having all of those conversations around the mealtime as well.

SPEAKER_00 2:49

Right.

SPEAKER_01 2:50

Food just happens to be, you know, a part of it. It's a big part of it, right? Yeah. And so it's the main character. And so um it's a it's a big deal. We need intentionality, and I think that hopefully we'll kind of get down to some very logistical things. And like, again, the whole thought behind this this podcast is what are a couple things we can take away? Yeah, we can get away. Like, how could we be a little bit more intentional behind mealtime, food, looking at our relationship with food? Yeah, all of that.

SPEAKER_00 3:22

I think that's the biggest challenge is as you're raising kids, you want them to do something, however, what if you're not, you know, you have to be held to the same standard you're holding your kids.

SPEAKER_01 3:33

Isn't that parenting like the Lord is working in us so we're fine on our journey because we are it's the whole thing.

SPEAKER_00 3:40

Showing us showing us all the what is it, the logs in our eyes? Yes. And all the logs, yes, so many areas of growth. Okay, so let's talk practically about food. Yep. What does that look like? Meal planning, like for you specifically, how do you do that?

SPEAKER_01 3:58

Some things that have been very helpful to me. I have just a note section in my phone of like our go-to meals. And we've had different, and each family will have different, you know, we're gluten-free, we're dairy free, our kids love this, we whatever. We're trying to be more intentional about veggies. So, whatever your go-to meals are, I have about 20 to 30 in a note section. And each beginning of the week, I will look at that section and be like, okay, what are six or seven meals here that I would like to do this week? Yeah. I get the food for those meals, and then I don't have like Monday, I'm gonna make this. If you want to, you can. If you want a meal prep at the beginning of the week, any of those is fine. That will that takes intentionality.

SPEAKER_00 4:40

Right.

SPEAKER_01 4:40

Um, but that's what working, it's what's working for us, and I can be like, okay, Monday, let me look at I have the things to make these meals. What do I feel like, or what's gonna work with our schedule today? And so I think it's really helped me. First of all, we all know the grocery shopping situation, and if you get in there without a plan, I know me. I'm like, it's so shiny in here, and maybe I need lipstick, and it's like the random things, but it keeps me on track. Yeah, and then I get home and I'm like, I bought all this stuff and I don't actually have meals here, and so it's just kept me on track. So that's been very helpful and added some intention behind my meals.

SPEAKER_00 5:21

So, what do you do a lot? I know we're in the season, it's t-ball season. Yes, games are at six, we arrive at 5:30. Yes. How do you navigate that with extracurriculars? How do you feed feed the fam on those times?

SPEAKER_01 5:34

Yes, so you know, I will do, I have some especially summer, kind of spring summer quick meals. Yeah. Um, so I am quick meals, and we know how important it is. Like, you can't get a child, I can't get myself to somewhere at dinner time and then be like, I'm going to function well all through dinner. We might not get home till eight o'clock. Um we're not doing that. Yeah. So we do a lot of early dinners and we just make it happen before. Sometimes you might. I know a good friend of mine, um, we just went out and did some farm time, and she brought like the snackle boxes that are so popular. And you can put in, you know, the proteins, and you can put in, you can put some really great snacks in there. Yeah. Maybe you bring that, and on the way you say, get your proteins in, get some veggies in. Yeah, then we're getting something in our system. Right. So that I understand that we're not necessarily going to have, we're gonna have some nights where it's not like everyone gather around the table. Yeah, it's just gonna happen. Yeah, but as much as we can to stay consistent in that area, I think is huge.

SPEAKER_00 6:38

Um, hot take. We did not talk about this before. So get ready. Here it is, off the cuff. Pro kids table. What's the opposite of pro anti? Anti-kids table. What are your thoughts?

SPEAKER_01 6:52

Well, I mean, we do integrated, we do integrated everything. And so I just I I understand, I see sometimes maybe if you have guests over and you need to kind of separate, that's fine. Right. Like we talked about at the beginning, we're teaching our kids the relationship around food. We're teaching our kids conversation during this time. Yeah, if they're separated from us, we're just gonna get less of those lessons during the mealtime. So it's such a great built-in space that's already gonna happen. Everyone needs to eat. Let's all sit down and gather and let's make this a teaching moment, let's make this relational, let's make this a family moment. And so I think it's just such a great, already built-in thing. That's good.

SPEAKER_00 7:34

Thanks for letting me throw that out. Yeah, yeah. Um, something that we do, I mean, this is very, very simple. And I mean, we have a four-year-old, a two-year-old, and two twin babies. Wow, and so it's we're not just like having these really deep, amazing conversations. Yep, you know. Um, it's very kid friendly and chaotic and a hot mess, to be frank. But the one thing that grounds us that we do every single night, and um, it's fun because when people come over, they do it with us. Yeah, and people who have come over a few times times, they know that the that this is coming, but we just simply ask. Denver likes to start, he's the the first one of course. I'm gonna start it. And he asks, so if you were sitting on he's saying, Angela, what was the best part of your day? Yes, and then you would say something simply that was the best part, and then you get to pick who goes next. Yes, and um it's just intentional, yep. And it's small, but it's teaching them that conversational piece, like you said. Yep. Um, and I think it just helps us to know we we all look forward to it when we sit down. Whereas if we didn't have anything, I think we'd just be like, When is this gonna be over the that's crazy?

SPEAKER_01 8:43

Yeah, and we have something similar, yeah. We do it. And if we miss it, the kids are like, let's do our highs and our yeah, yeah, yes, yeah. So I think it's I think it's just one of those things that you can add in and you get to brainstorm with your spouse and be like, what's gonna be good for our family? How is this something fun? You can come up with your own, you can ask people who are already doing it. I just think it's such an opportunity for us to connect with the family.

SPEAKER_00 9:09

Yeah, okay. So I we've all been here. Well, if you haven't, you're going to, that's a point. But I was here last night. We cooked an amazing, you know, healthy dinner. Yes. We sit down to eat. We've been doing a lot of outside dinners actually because it's so nice. Yes. But um, my kids eat like two bites and they're like, I'm done. I want to get down and like can't they they they don't get down unless they say, well, they're supposed to, Mommy, can I get down, please? Yes. And I'm like, no, you haven't eaten anything. And there's this refusal to eat dinner. Yeah. How do we navigate that? Do we fight them and we're like, you will not leave this table until all of your food is done? Or do we say, you know what, I'm gonna pick my battles and if you're hungry, if if you're if you're hungry, you'll eat.

SPEAKER_01 9:58

Sure. And what's so I don't think that there can be a here's what you do. But I will say, whatever you choose as a family, you and your spouse have to be on the same page. You have to talk about it beforehand and say, what are our convictions behind this? Yeah, how are we going to play this out? Yeah, what will the rules be? Yeah, because uh you know how this goes with children. Yeah, if there's a chink in the arm, or if there's a little weakness, they're like, Oh, I see, dad will then but mom. And so they'll snake around and figure it out. And so being on the same page and then holding that line wherever you guys decide that is and being consistent about it. Yeah. Uh, for us, we give a very we know our kids, we know a reasonable portion for them. We know kind of what they've been eating throughout the day and what the snacks were looking like, and I'll give a very, very reasonable portion. And then they are expected to eat what's on the plate. Yes. We've had many a night where we have sat at the table, and you know, Aaron will tell you that was one of the greatest gifts that his parents gave him, is just because he would say that he was very particular about food, and that this principle really instilled in him. Yeah, I I appreciate food. I'm going to love all kinds of different food. I'm going to, and it's again, you'll have to kind of weigh this out, and because we do want them to have a healthy relationship with food. This is not force feeding, this is not like, and they're gonna sit down and have all this. That's not what that's not at least how we have seen that play out. Yeah, it's actually played out in they just have a healthier relationship, yeah. They are more intentional at meals about eating as opposed to the snacking, because any child would love to snack throughout the entire day and then meals. Amen. Like this is a this is a learned behavior, it's a skill to have this. And so to be able to be like meals are the most important. And anytime our children start to kind of waver or struggle in that area, we'll just kind of casually mention you know that if we have issues with meal time, we'll have to reconsider our snacks and what we're getting and when those are being given. And it's a me, it's it's pretty immediate, like it's it's pretty funny how it's like.

SPEAKER_00 12:23

I've never thought about that, the give and take of snack and meal time and that being the most important thing.

SPEAKER_01 12:29

Because we talk about listen, guys, your meals are where you're gonna get the bulk of your energy to be able to do what you're supposed to do. And so if you can't have that because of the snacking, we're gonna, which are less important, we're gonna have to pull back on those. And they're like, no, no, there's no need for that sort of talk. We will get it together. It's it's really amazing how quickly they jump back on, and so we do we hold a strong line again. That's a conviction that both Erin and I have, and so I think whatever you guys agree on, being consistent with it, and then it is worth it. It is worth it in the long run for them to have a healthy relationship in that area.

SPEAKER_00 13:11

So, do you make your kids a separate meal or do they eat whatever?

SPEAKER_01 13:16

Absolutely not, and you know, I mean, we have to do that. Well, I mean, that's what I yeah, you guys have a lot of conviction. No, that is a conviction, and that has been since the beginning where I said, Whoa, all these children, we're not going to do that. Yeah, we're going to have, and and you know, the kids will say something like, I don't like this. And our response is generally, it doesn't have to be your favorite. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:38

I I've watched you guys and we use them now too because they'll be like, I don't like these. And last night it was the little the zucchinis that were in the rice dish today. And they're like, I don't like these. I'm like, uh, these aren't my favorite.

SPEAKER_01 13:52

Yes, these aren't my favorite, but we'll eat them because they're good for us. And and you do you develop uh the taste for some things, it's not like we all started out and loved asparagus and you know, even broccoli or Brussels sprouts or whatever, but there is a growing in and our body craves what we feed it. Yeah, and so we're firm believers in that. And so the more that we're eating really good things for us, my parents were huge. I mean, we had vegetables with every meal, they tried a lot of different varieties, and so I grew up really enjoying vegetables and a and a variety of them. Yeah, and I just think we can give that gift to our children as well.

SPEAKER_00 14:36

So speak to the mom who this is not how they operate. It's far from how they operate. Yep, they do chicken nuggets and mac and cheese for their kids. Yes, um, because it's easy and you know, and we've been there many times where we've done the convenient over the for sure, the hard, you know, and so speak to that. How would you encourage, empower, equip the mom who says, you know what? I have a desire to for on the practical food side to make the meals more intentional, yeah to start training my kids in this way, yeah, but it's far from where we've been. Sure. What would you say?

SPEAKER_01 15:23

Uh I think just the invitation, what's a step or two that I can take? Yeah. And so I think very easy rules that you could come up with or guidelines more of that you're going to follow. Yeah. I'm going to add a veggie to each of our lunch and dinners. That could be canned carrots, that could be canned cream, green beans, like very easy. Right. We're not talking you have to be in there like sauteing and we're like, you know, doing the yeah. It doesn't have to be complex. Yeah. But how can we just get slip a veggie in there? Could we do a smoothie? You know, I love smoothie o'clock. Oh, yeah. We could do a smoothie and we could slip in some spinach or things that they won't even know necessarily are there. Yeah. I do love that idea, but I also love this idea of them knowing exactly what it is that they're taking in and growing to appreciate it. And then they know, like, no, in my palate, or when I look at food, this is okay. You know, I think of the foods that I send with the little boys to preschool. And, you know, I'm sure OB gets the looks with the broccoli, but him being like, it's actually really good. And so he has learned and been grown and taught, you know, this is something that we enjoy and we have regularly. And so even if it's one step in that area, okay, yes, I can add veggies to each meal.

SPEAKER_00 16:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:47

I can maybe spend five minutes at the beginning of the week and maybe put a little more intentionality behind meals. Yeah. I could come up with, okay, let's do this. Because I think that it can be so reactionary. We are so busy, we carry so much on our schedule, we have so much on the agenda. But if we put just a little bit of time, five minutes, we could say, okay, yeah, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. I could do, here's what it is, very easy. We can do this, and then we have a plan. Yeah. And so I think that that could bring a lot of hope. And um, I think you get excited as you get more momentum. And it's like, okay, what are what are the further steps that I could be taking? So I think the invitation would be one or two. One or two.

SPEAKER_00 17:29

And I love the the education piece where you guys are teaching the kids this is what you're taking in, this is how it affects your body. Absolutely. Um I we've been, you know, trying to do similar. We're learn we're learning too. Sure. And yes, uh, we've been telling the kids, you know, this is your protein, like this is what makes your muscles strong. Yes. And the other night, Denver was like, Yeah, he was telling Eliza, yeah, sister girl, this is what's gonna make you strong. He was like, because I eat it and I'm gonna be strong enough to beat daddy up. You know, oh that's the motivation, you know, whatever it takes.

SPEAKER_01 18:06

Whatever. He's like, one day, one day with these strong arms been eaten. Take my father down. But it is, yeah, food is medicine. Like that's very much what we believe that God gives us food so that we can be who we're called to be and do the things we're called. So it is, it's um our culture has just made it into something so much more. And so just coming back to the basics of what is food meant for, and it has all sorts of different capabilities and and it's there to serve us. Yeah, like we don't serve food sort of thing.

SPEAKER_00 18:43

Oh, say that again. That's so good. Um, okay. Well, we always have a weekly challenge. Yes. So I feel like you feel like we covered everything we needed to? I do, I do.

SPEAKER_01 18:53

I think that was a good, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:55

Uh I what would you say would be the weekly challenge for this week?

SPEAKER_01 18:59

I think we kind of hit on it already. Um, yes, specific to the areas of how do I add a vegin or whatever, but just what are one or two steps that I could take to just be more intentional if they haven't had a conversation with their spouse about hey, we're what is mealtime gonna look like? Yeah. What are the the things that we're going to stand firm on? Like what's gonna be our line? When is it too much? When do we get to pull back? Sort of thing. So I think having that conversation with them, one or two things that you know they can just be more intentional about.

SPEAKER_00 19:31

We can all be more intentional. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 19:33

We all have room to grow in this area.

SPEAKER_00 19:35

Yeah, that's good. Thank you for sharing. Love it. Thank you for joining us on the Stronger Families podcast. If today's episode encouraged you, share it with another family who could use it. And remember that when God strengthens you, he strengthens your family. So let's keep building stronger families together.