Episode 10: I GOT CAUGHT HOOKING UP IN THE CHILI’S PARKING LOT

This video features a candid lunch-hour conversation between the hosts, Art and Sam, as they catch up on their lives while struggling with their weight-loss goals. The hosts engage in playful banter about their food choices—specifically Art claiming to eat a salad while Sam orders fast food—and discuss their personal lives, including dating mishaps and workplace dynamics.

Key Highlights:

•The "Lunch" Struggle: The conversation starts with the hosts ordering food, leading to a humorous debate about what they are actually eating versus what they claim to be eating to stay healthy (0:30-11:00).
•Personal Stories and Confessions: Art shares a particularly wild story about a recent sexual encounter in a Chili's parking lot (19:40-21:30), which leads to a broader discussion about their dating lives, their history of being "hoes," and feeling "bloated" from poor choices (22:45-23:45).
•Podcast Dynamics: Throughout the recording, they reflect on their podcasting journey, the importance of their viewers, and the challenges of staying consistent with their health goals (25:00-26:50, 28:40-30:40).
•Workplace Banter: The hosts discuss how they handle teasing from coworkers regarding their weight, emphasizing that they only tolerate it from people they are actually close with (29:00-30:10).

The episode concludes with a lighthearted agreement to focus on their health starting in April, despite their previous failures to stay consistent (30:30-32:50).

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:23

You fat bitch.

SPEAKER_00 0:26

Fuck off. Hello.

SPEAKER_01 0:28

Whoa.

SPEAKER_00 0:29

Hi. Um, do you still have the oh my god. Do you have the double cheeseburger still tooth or the what is it? Buy one, get one for a dollar. Yes, you do.

SPEAKER_01 0:39

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 0:40

Can I have um can I have that? But on both of them, can I get no onion and extra pickle?

SPEAKER_01 0:46

Okay, I'm loving this order.

SPEAKER_00 0:49

Okay. And then can I get small Coke with no ice? Shut the fuck up.

SPEAKER_03 0:55

Can I get that hunt? Can I get that hunt? Can I get that any other one?

SPEAKER_00 1:01

You're a bitch. Oh, now he can hear me loud and clear.

SPEAKER_03 1:06

Oh my god. You're ordering all that shit as I'm eating a salad.

SPEAKER_00 1:11

Liar? Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_03 1:13

I'm being done out.

SPEAKER_00 1:15

Yeah, okay. But like last time, oh, I'm going to the kitten that I had a Coke. I'm like, you know what?

SPEAKER_03 1:23

I do have a Coke right in front of me, but I'm not drinking that Coke. I'm drinking this clear American sweetened strawberry sparkling water.

SPEAKER_00 1:33

Yeah, right. Oh, you couldn't hear me at first. I sounded so far away, but you sure in the fuck heard me order my food.

SPEAKER_03 1:42

Cause that shit was funny.

SPEAKER_00 1:45

I know. I put the phone in the cup holder so you couldn't hear me. That's why.

SPEAKER_03 1:50

Where where were you were you ordering from, Mackels?

SPEAKER_00 1:53

Yeah, because I don't feel like driving nowhere else. This is why I'm fat.

SPEAKER_03 1:58

Bitch, it's it's about to be April. You know, it's April. You know we're going live in June.

SPEAKER_01 2:04

I know. Look at us talking.

SPEAKER_00 2:10

No, I thought we pushed it. You said July, bitch. Yes, you did. You changed it. Because it was July. I did change it. And then you changed it to July. We can change it. Or I don't know. Can we do a video from our neck up? But then again, our face is upset too.

SPEAKER_03 2:28

Like, can we bring in a pool and just like from the neck up?

SPEAKER_01 2:33

Yep.

unknown 2:33

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 2:34

Great. She repeated it.

SPEAKER_00 2:38

Uh yes, please.

SPEAKER_03 2:41

Well, I I love this.

SPEAKER_00 2:43

Shut up. We should have put that on the podcast. Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 2:46

It's already recording. I'm actually putting this in a bottle.

SPEAKER_00 2:48

I love this. Like, what an intro be like. What an intro.

SPEAKER_03 2:52

Wait, wait, hold on. I just realized I didn't say, hey, welcome to hey guys, welcome back to problematic. As you can tell, um, we're eating. This is lunch hour.

SPEAKER_00 3:04

Oh my god. And we're supposed to be losing weight, everybody.

SPEAKER_03 3:08

Hey, bitch. I'm eating a salad. I'm dead ass.

SPEAKER_00 3:12

Thank you. You're such a liar.

SPEAKER_03 3:15

You're not eating a fucking salad. You're eating fucking macals over there.

SPEAKER_00 3:20

I know, and I genuinely don't like McDonald's, but you know what? Oh, bitch, gotta eat.

SPEAKER_01 3:27

Um just like eating them.

SPEAKER_00 3:30

Um really look at oh yeah, he's eating the salad, but he's like salad. Yeah, what kind of salad?

SPEAKER_03 3:42

Southwest salad.

SPEAKER_00 3:43

What'd you think of that fast?

SPEAKER_01 3:46

Huh?

SPEAKER_00 3:47

What'd you think of that fast? You said that shit quick. Southwest salad. Wait.

SPEAKER_03 3:56

Wait, why are you so funny today? You're never this funny.

SPEAKER_00 3:59

Because I told you when I'm at work, it's more energy because I've been up for a while and I'm not going. Yeah. So I got a salad. No, you didn't.

SPEAKER_03 4:15

We all heard your order. What are you told about?

SPEAKER_00 4:17

I got a salad with cheese.

SPEAKER_03 4:20

Um I order from um that one sandwich place.

SPEAKER_00 4:26

You're such a liar.

SPEAKER_03 4:28

They give me the wrong sandwich.

SPEAKER_00 4:31

Like that girl that she's like.

SPEAKER_03 4:34

I'm really upset right now. She'll be like, I ordered like I order an apple and they give me chips.

SPEAKER_00 4:43

Oh forgot, that was that's like my I only seen like a 30, not even 30 seconds of it, but I seen that part. And for some reason I was laughing. I'm like, bitch. Cause she's like, I ordered like apple slices and they sent me a bag of chips.

SPEAKER_03 4:57

But that's okay.

SPEAKER_00 4:58

What is it? The burger one when she's like, I ordered, what did she say? Is it a salad?

SPEAKER_03 5:05

I don't think I've seen that one. I've just seen the one with the with the sandwich.

SPEAKER_00 5:09

There's one that she's like, I I think it's a salad. I could be wrong. But she says, I ordered this, and she's like, and they sent me like a double bacon burger. And she's like, that's not what I ordered. She's like, but okay, let's try it. She takes a bite and she's like, um, it's okay, it's not bad.

SPEAKER_03 5:28

I'm like, no, no, that's a sandwich.

SPEAKER_00 5:34

Whatever. Shout out to her though, because she's hilarious.

SPEAKER_03 5:38

Shout out. You know, you have the um to come on camera. No, but she has the confidence to come on camera and you know what?

SPEAKER_00 5:47

Now I'm here to do it.

SPEAKER_03 5:48

And we're just lying behind closed doors.

SPEAKER_00 5:50

I feel like everything is clickbait now. Cause it's like you don't know what's real and what's not real anymore.

SPEAKER_03 5:56

I mean, they're not gonna be like, You know what's not clickbait.

SPEAKER_00 5:59

What?

SPEAKER_03 5:59

But you know what's not clickbait? It's the title of the last podcast.

SPEAKER_00 6:03

Oh, I know. Hell yeah. That's not clickbait.

SPEAKER_03 6:06

I love how you were like, oh, should we just change it real quick? Yeah, I like to be like from the fights to betrayal.

SPEAKER_00 6:12

Because I mean, like, it wasn't even a fight because uh-huh, can't compete, can't compare where they can't compete. But it was like a nasty betrayal, you know?

SPEAKER_03 6:22

The betrayal is real.

SPEAKER_00 6:23

But speaking of betrayal, how real is this betrayal that we're supposed to be skinny?

SPEAKER_03 6:29

Nah, for real. No, dude. I called off work yesterday. You know why?

SPEAKER_00 6:35

Why?

SPEAKER_03 6:35

Because the day before, not only I was in my garage just like chilling, I like I drank like three those like spiked iced teas. I forgot what what are those called?

unknown 6:48

I thought.

SPEAKER_03 6:49

And then I ordered uh 7-Eleven.

SPEAKER_00 6:51

Um you ordered a water, but they sent you those ice twisted teas. That's that one. Pretty tasty.

SPEAKER_03 7:01

No, um, and then like I ordered like Yeah, but then I ordered like those like little like those like little like taco sticks like in a row or something like that, and a bag of chips. I was so fucking bloated. So waking up yesterday, I was so fucking bloated. Like, I feel like I've I ate like at least like three little Caesars pizzas.

SPEAKER_00 7:26

By yourself?

SPEAKER_03 7:27

Yeah. I need to stop. Because you know what? It's a lot, I think you know what? You know what it is?

SPEAKER_00 7:31

I think I you're joking, right? You didn't eat three pizzas, did you?

SPEAKER_03 7:37

No, you dumb cut. Like you really think I no. I mean, it's possible. I mean, it is possible. No, no, but you know what it is though? I think uh I think I'm allergic to gluten. I I I don't I don't think like the I'm allergic to healthy stuff. No, gluten is like in the pizza and the pasta and all that stuff. Because why is it like if I fast for like 17 to like 24 hours and I eat like a slice of pizza or like a banana or some shit like that, I feel bloated as fuck.

SPEAKER_01 8:14

You still drink a lot, right?

SPEAKER_03 8:17

You know, I I stopped.

SPEAKER_00 8:20

I'm just saying, I stopped. Drinking has a lot of sugar.

SPEAKER_03 8:25

No, but what I do drink, I do drink it's just like the the the spirits, like the like a vodka and like uh a sugar-free coke.

SPEAKER_01 8:34

Bitch, it's still sugar in the liquor.

SPEAKER_03 8:37

Nah, not a lot though. It's a good alternative. Like, like, like the little iced teas in the Mike's harder lemonade that I'd be drinking, that has a lot of sugar.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

True. But regardless of the city.

SPEAKER_03 8:50

You know, but it's still in the garage. Regardless, alcohol has sugar honey. It has, yeah, I know it has yeah, but but like, you know, if I'm drinking like a vodka, like a Tito's vodka with like a sugar-free Coke, I could do that. It's not that, it's not bad.

SPEAKER_01 9:05

It's not bad. It's not bad. It's pretty good. It's pretty tasty.

SPEAKER_03 9:11

I fucking I fucking hating. Hey, so Sam, I know we didn't do an intro, and it's kind of too late to do an intro. So, hey, how are you? How's everything? How is life?

SPEAKER_00 9:21

I mean, I'm trying to like lose this weight, and it's just like I'm not happy.

SPEAKER_03 9:25

Trying to lose that weight where you're on a fucking drive-thru and Macco's fucking like ordering everything up there.

SPEAKER_00 9:31

Trust me, like sometimes like if I eat a burger from McDonald's, I want to barf afterwards. But we in a recession, y'all, and shit is just getting outrageous with these prices. I mean, I know McDonald's not even, remember they used to have like the dollar menu? There's no such thing anymore. And I thought like they would at least have something that's like maybe like$2. No, like a cheeseburger that used to be on the dollar menu is like almost damn near$3. But if you go to like anywhere else for a fucking salad or something, especially if it's healthy, they want to charge a fucking arm and a leg. And it's like, really?

SPEAKER_03 10:08

Like$25 fucking dollars for them.

SPEAKER_00 10:11

For a water. Like for a water and a decent salad from like, it could be from anywhere, portillos, it could be from anywhere. Even if you go to like a grocery store, it's like$10, almost$15 just those two items. Meanwhile, they have like burger deals, like, oh, if you buy like one burger, you get one for a dollar, like shit like that. So it's like, of course, what are you gonna go with?

SPEAKER_03 10:36

No, I didn't just stop. I mean, I don't have a salad right now. No, you don't. I do have a salad, believe me.

SPEAKER_00 10:44

I don't believe you. I feel like you have like a cereal or something.

SPEAKER_03 10:50

Why am I eating cereal at 1 p.m.?

SPEAKER_00 10:53

Because who wouldn't? I love cereal. Ah, you have a pop, bitch.

SPEAKER_03 10:59

I told you it's a clear American strawberry. Not sponsored. I swear to Bob that that is my.

SPEAKER_00 11:10

You don't even like Bob, so now I know you're lying.

SPEAKER_03 11:15

Just fucking believe me. I know I've lied before, but does not mean that I'm lying now. Yeah, you are lying. No, but I need to stop though, because you know, I'm like on one of my days off, I I went from ordering breakfast, McDonald's, right? And then afternoon, freaking panda, and then maybe some Popeye's chicken, like a one full day.

SPEAKER_00 11:36

Are you fucking kidding me?

SPEAKER_03 11:36

I need to stop. Dude, that's how I am. I feel like I feel like I have an eating disorder.

SPEAKER_00 11:44

And it's just weird because I remember he wouldn't even like to eat.

SPEAKER_03 11:48

That's fucking that is insane, right? Because I'm so you know, I've been stressed. I'm gonna lie, I'm not gonna lie, guys. I'm not lying on the pot. I've been stressed the fuck out.

SPEAKER_00 11:57

I feel like it'll be different if you were stressed out, like, or not even, I feel like it'll be different if you were like drinking heavy. And then like you stopped drinking, but then you started eating. Because it's like, you know, you feel you're feeling like a a hoe or something. But you're still drinking, bitch.

SPEAKER_03 12:17

I don't know why you're yelling at me right now.

SPEAKER_00 12:19

Because I can't.

SPEAKER_03 12:20

I just told her, I just told you I have a disorder and you're just like making fun of me.

SPEAKER_00 12:24

You that's not even making fun of you. That's just telling you the telling you the deeds.

SPEAKER_03 12:27

It's already out of the other. No, but no, I'm just showing you because of my family, bro. My family definitely stressing me the fuck out.

SPEAKER_00 12:36

No, they don't. I love your sisters. Are you I forgot, are you the older brother or what?

SPEAKER_03 12:42

Yes, but I don't mean shit.

SPEAKER_00 12:44

Yes, it does. You're supposed to take care of them.

SPEAKER_03 12:47

Fuck you. Now when Nett have three kids already.

SPEAKER_00 12:52

There's nothing wrong with having children.

SPEAKER_03 12:54

Are you inside already?

SPEAKER_00 12:56

No, I have to pee. Hold on, sorry. It's gonna get quiet right now.

SPEAKER_03 13:04

No, not with your pussy.

SPEAKER_00 13:06

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 13:10

So guys, this isn't this is where um the audio listeners.

SPEAKER_00 13:16

They might hear it or they might not. Just depends.

SPEAKER_03 13:20

It's gonna be a little flush of water.

SPEAKER_01 13:26

A flush of water.

SPEAKER_03 13:27

I wanna hear it. Yeah, because you're peeing. No, we hear it.

SPEAKER_00 13:33

I haven't started yet because I know you're listening. I'm so weird like that. Like, if I know so.

SPEAKER_03 13:39

Pause your freaking phone or like silence your shit for a second, and I can just, you know.

SPEAKER_00 13:44

Okay, I'm gonna silence.

SPEAKER_03 13:47

Wow, guys. That is Sam. Sorry, guys. I know she was taking the shit.

SPEAKER_00 13:54

If I was, I would totally let you know. Like, you know what? I gotta like totally go.

SPEAKER_03 13:59

Why do you have to come back after I said that though? Because that most that that more clarifies you were taking the shit.

SPEAKER_01 14:09

What up?

SPEAKER_00 14:14

You don't have like a fart sound in the things.

SPEAKER_03 14:18

I don't even think it's gonna record if I do. Hold on.

SPEAKER_00 14:21

I know, I'm scared for you to press it and then it doesn't record nothing.

SPEAKER_03 14:25

Do you hear that?

SPEAKER_00 14:26

What? Do it again.

SPEAKER_03 14:28

I already did.

SPEAKER_00 14:29

I don't hear it.

SPEAKER_03 14:31

No?

SPEAKER_00 14:32

I hope this thing is recording.

SPEAKER_03 14:34

No, the audio is, but I don't think anything on the on the board is recording. I don't know why. It's fucking crazy. That sucks, but whatever.

SPEAKER_00 14:46

Well, no, now I'm just sitting in the bathroom waiting until everyone leaves the lobby so that way when I run out there, at least you don't hear too much going on.

SPEAKER_03 14:53

I'm gonna hear that Sam. I love it. This is like day in the life of Stamila. You know how I have you on my phone? I have you as uh Stamila Hartley.

SPEAKER_00 15:05

Who the fuck is Hartley?

SPEAKER_03 15:06

I don't know. I just thought it was sounding bomb, and I'm like, never put that bitch.

SPEAKER_00 15:09

I honestly have you under Ratchet, like they've been having it for years.

SPEAKER_03 15:13

Fucking ratchet. You should have me a nah, I'm I should have you a rat.

SPEAKER_00 15:18

No, that was you, remember?

SPEAKER_03 15:21

No, that's because you guys fucking put a rat on that balloon.

SPEAKER_00 15:24

That was so funny. Everyone was like, oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 15:28

What happened? Who did that?

SPEAKER_00 15:30

And like you right away was like, I know exactly who did that.

SPEAKER_03 15:34

And I love how it was so dramatic and I tagged everybody. I was like, who the fuck did this?

SPEAKER_00 15:40

I know because you asked, you're like, I think I still have the post somewhere.

SPEAKER_03 15:45

I think I have it too.

SPEAKER_00 15:47

And you're just like, really, it was like a poly D moment, really, guys, really? And then everyone was in a stupid group chat, like, I didn't do it. I don't.

SPEAKER_03 15:59

I know. And then like even the most innocent girls, like, I didn't even do it. I'm like, bitch, I know you didn't do it. But I don't know who did.

SPEAKER_00 16:05

I was like the only one that was.

SPEAKER_03 16:07

And I need that bitch to come forward.

SPEAKER_00 16:08

And then you're like, this has no. Everyone was saying that they didn't do it. And I think I put laugh out loud. I did I put something. And then you're like, I knew it was you before I even said anything.

SPEAKER_03 16:19

I know, and then you were like, I did that shit weeks ago. You just noticed it now. I was like, wait, what?

SPEAKER_00 16:26

Can you guys get out of the lobby?

SPEAKER_03 16:30

Like, I'm gonna go back to the core.

SPEAKER_00 16:32

I do and finish my cloud.

SPEAKER_03 16:37

You mean your fucking burger and large fry and a large shake? Okay, girl.

SPEAKER_00 16:40

Uh-uh, bitch. I don't know. I don't like well, actually, burger. They have good fries. So it's not too bad. Only when you put salt on it, because they don't like putting stuff, so it gets on my nerves.

SPEAKER_03 16:53

Hey, it's it's whatever when it comes to fast food. I don't know. But you know what? This salad did not fill me up.

SPEAKER_00 17:00

I bet.

SPEAKER_03 17:02

I need to stop, Sam.

SPEAKER_00 17:05

Well, you're not helping.

SPEAKER_03 17:07

Well, this is the thing, though. I have events, okay, I have appearances, okay? People are coming to see me.

SPEAKER_00 17:12

Who's trying to see you?

SPEAKER_03 17:14

I mean, not really, but I have, you know, I have sueños, I have Lala, I have the podcast, like run.

SPEAKER_00 17:25

You heard my pause. Because she didn't want to let me go. She's like, stay. I'm like, no, bitch, I gotta go. Bye.

SPEAKER_03 17:33

No, that meme I'm buying. Run. Dun dun dun.

SPEAKER_00 17:39

You know what we have to do?

SPEAKER_03 17:41

What?

SPEAKER_00 17:42

While we're still fat, make a music video in the rain.

SPEAKER_01 17:46

The fuck?

SPEAKER_00 17:47

You know that guy that he's fat and he seems where I carry my off and even in the rain, I'll send it to you later, and he's over here lit singing like I get Mariah.

SPEAKER_03 17:59

I don't like Mariah like that though.

SPEAKER_00 18:01

Bitch, I love her, and you do too, because I have videos of us singing her.

SPEAKER_03 18:06

Yeah, we belong together.

SPEAKER_00 18:08

I know.

SPEAKER_03 18:08

That was when I was like, I didn't know nothing.

SPEAKER_00 18:15

Yeah. Maybe you shouldn't.

SPEAKER_01 18:18

Bitch. Whatever. I'm over it.

SPEAKER_03 18:26

So can I talk to you about what happened? Well, that's that's what, you know, like, okay. So on Saturday when I got back from work, right? Um I got back from work. I love you. No, I I went to okay, I I chilled for a second. I had a few drinks in my house, right? And then I'm like, ugh, it's early. Let me go catch Scream 7 before I buy it on digital, which it came out today.

SPEAKER_00 18:55

I know. How many times are you gonna fucking watch that movie?

SPEAKER_03 18:58

I watched it seven times already in the movie theater, so so that was my seventh time watching it, and it was like the first time ever watching it. So I went, I went, right, and I got a little drunk, whatever, whatever. I got back home. I got back home, and then I started, you know, going through the apps. You know, you know, I I discussed the apps in the Mardi Gras episode. I started going through the apps, and I got a little bored, a little lonely, some might say.

SPEAKER_00 19:32

Go ahead.

SPEAKER_03 19:34

I met up with somebody.

SPEAKER_00 19:36

Did the call come from inside the house?

SPEAKER_03 19:38

No, I came about, it came it came from 63rd. Um, so whatever. We met up. It it picked me up from uh from another location because not my house. And then we were we were just like cruising around. We were cruising around, and then we saw like a restaurant that was closed, and we just decided to park in the back of that restaurant. That restaurant had happened to be chilies. I love chili.

SPEAKER_00 20:10

Well, no, I don't know, not in Chili's was my go-to.

SPEAKER_03 20:13

I love I love chilies. I love chilies. But the thing is, a lot we were like conversating, we're you know, we were talking, I was a little loosey-goosey. And yeah, one thing led to another.

SPEAKER_00 20:25

He whipped it out and said, Can you suck it?

SPEAKER_03 20:27

Low-key, just like that. I'm not even lying. Dad as just like that. Like, I'm like, whoa! Like Dan's kind of like Sam, were you there? I'm like, so yeah, so my Saturday, yeah, my Saturday. Okay. Imagine you were there, right? I was like, bitch.

SPEAKER_00 20:49

Or that was one of my friends. And it's like I had this slut in the back of a chili.

unknown 20:56

Oh.

SPEAKER_03 20:58

Low-key that was me on Saturday. So yeah, so I ended up sucking the egg in the back of the chili.

SPEAKER_00 21:05

You should put that as a title.

SPEAKER_03 21:08

I am, I am, because you know what?

SPEAKER_00 21:11

Put you did what in the back of the chilies? So chilies used to be my go-to spot, but then they took off my favorite dish, so I guess I'm not going there no more.

SPEAKER_03 21:23

What was your favorite dish?

SPEAKER_00 21:25

I loved, apparently yours was sausage, but I loved the it's like the appetizer. It was the classic nachos.

SPEAKER_03 21:36

The classic nachos?

SPEAKER_00 21:38

Yes. Chicken classic nachos was my shit. And apparently I went to Chili's. I haven't been there in months, so I went there not too long ago, and it's gone. They're like, we discontinued it. I was like, are you sure, Ho, or are you lying? And apparently, yeah, so Chili's, I'm sorry. You've been dismissed. That was a last time. It was. I was really upset. But I mean at least I didn't get a whole mouthful. Like you.

SPEAKER_02 22:09

It wasn't a mouthful. It was just like. Okay, it was a mouthful.

SPEAKER_00 22:17

Ten out of ten.

SPEAKER_03 22:17

I had fun. I want to say like it's eight out of ten, maybe.

SPEAKER_00 22:21

Not bad, not bad. It could have been a one.

SPEAKER_03 22:24

Yeah. Well, whatever. No, but yeah, that's what happened on Saturday. And then after that, you know what? After that, I got no no no no. Let's not do anything. Let's be quiet.

SPEAKER_00 22:34

No, you might as well tell us.

SPEAKER_03 22:36

No, like, because right after that, like I started feeling like blow.

SPEAKER_00 22:40

Oh my god. Art, can you please explain to the viewers that like you weren't always a hoe?

SPEAKER_03 22:49

Sam, I was always a hoe.

SPEAKER_00 22:52

No, not when you were in not when you were in love. Exactly. At one point you weren't a hoe. You were very faithful.

SPEAKER_03 23:02

Actually, no, you're right. You're right. You're so right. I was never a hoe. I think after the breakup.

SPEAKER_00 23:07

It was that cushive, because then you had to like something to yourself.

SPEAKER_03 23:13

I know.

SPEAKER_00 23:14

I wonder where he's at.

SPEAKER_03 23:16

I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 23:17

But I remember I ate his ass, so did you do the or did you do the so it could go all over the place?

SPEAKER_03 23:32

That's gonna be our new thing now. I need to record it and be like before we start any podcast.

SPEAKER_00 23:40

I love I swear when I seen that in the movie theater, I'm like, oh my god, that's me and art. You notice any sound that's related to us is like, remember the TikTok?

SPEAKER_01 23:55

Is that real?

SPEAKER_00 23:58

Didn't we do that in Party City one time too?

SPEAKER_03 24:01

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We put like a like a fake, I think during Halloween, I think.

SPEAKER_00 24:05

Yes. If they had TikTok when we were in Party City, I feel like we would be like up there in numbers.

SPEAKER_03 24:12

I feel like we would because we would have we we did a lot of stuff. We recorded a lot of things.

SPEAKER_00 24:17

Like just out of stupidity, and it's like that's how you know God knew we were gonna be too much for the internet, so he waited until we were separated.

SPEAKER_03 24:27

They were like, he was like, Yeah, y'all need to chill for a sec, cause it's gonna be too much.

SPEAKER_00 24:33

Right? You guys will get canceled within five minutes.

SPEAKER_03 24:37

Shit. I get canceled every five seconds.

SPEAKER_00 24:40

Well, that's okay, because if it gets canceled, that means you're doing something right. I mean, yeah. Before I forget, I want to thank all the people that have downloaded our podcast.

SPEAKER_03 24:52

Yes. Yes, yes, yes.

SPEAKER_00 24:55

Like, that's crazy, isn't it? It is. Like now I know how people feel. Like when I used to see videos and they'll be like, oh, thank you to like my first like a hundred viewers or whatever. I used to be like, it's not that serious, it's just people watching you. But it does make you feel like oh painful.

SPEAKER_03 25:19

Hey, hold on, that's my neighbors.

SPEAKER_01 25:21

I was about to say, is that your neighbors?

SPEAKER_03 25:24

Yeah. Our blog, our our our blog got a little ethnic last month.

SPEAKER_00 25:31

I love that.

SPEAKER_03 25:33

But yeah, thank you so much for the video.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

Put her on the podcast. She sounds like the real dude. Keifa!

SPEAKER_03 25:40

Did you hear that?

SPEAKER_00 25:41

What did Kefa do? You got to tell us.

SPEAKER_03 25:44

I don't know what's happening. But I stopped for a second. Like, I was like listening to you, but I was like, wait, hold on.

SPEAKER_00 25:49

I was listening to we both I stopped too. I forgot we were doing a podcast. I'm like, wait.

SPEAKER_03 25:53

Yeah, I was like, wait, hold on. I'm being a fucking Chin Musle. No, but yeah, but no, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:01

You do gotta ask her now. Like, you gotta make sure Keith is okay. Like it didn't sound like he was okay at all.

SPEAKER_03 26:05

Nah, they'll be alright. They're like, yeah, they're fine. No, but like, no, but I love that. But, anyways, back back to the stat.

SPEAKER_00 26:20

Oh my god, yes, to the subscribers, to the viewers, even to the people that just listen to us just to be like, they sound stupid. Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 26:29

Yeah, because like this one, this this podcast that we're just recording right now, I'm gonna post this as it because I feel like it was pretty funny.

SPEAKER_00 26:36

I think it was hilarious. I was just like, So, like, if we could get like the viewers, if they wanted to chime in one day, do like a questionnaire, like anything. Tell us about something that's going on in their life.

SPEAKER_01 26:50

No.

SPEAKER_00 26:51

Let them be heard.

SPEAKER_03 26:55

I don't care much about people.

SPEAKER_00 26:57

Yes, you do. Yes, you do because you love stories and gossip and stuff. So I'm pretty sure if they were to say some gossip, like, hey, I got a train random made by two zebras and a monkey, you'll be down.

SPEAKER_03 27:15

Whoa. Different channel. That's a different that's different. Whoa.

SPEAKER_00 27:21

The animal channel?

SPEAKER_03 27:23

Two zebras and a monkey.

SPEAKER_00 27:26

I don't even know how that's possible, but it just sounds like it goes.

SPEAKER_03 27:33

You got that from Missy Elliot, didn't you? Mm-hmm. I heard that bitch got run over by two zebras and a monkey. I can't stand that bitch, no way.

SPEAKER_00 27:48

Shout out to Missy Elliot. That's my girl.

SPEAKER_03 27:51

Shout out to Missy Misdemeanor Elliot for amazing.

SPEAKER_00 27:55

So good still.

SPEAKER_03 27:58

Damn, we have a mouthful of burger.

SPEAKER_00 28:02

Bitch, I'll kill you.

SPEAKER_03 28:05

You hold a bitch, I'll kill you.

SPEAKER_00 28:07

I'm sorry, he had a mouthful of dick.

SPEAKER_03 28:11

That's fucking crazy. Like, can you like does the semen have gluten? Cuz I've been blowing it ever since.

SPEAKER_00 28:23

No, you're just fat.

SPEAKER_03 28:26

No, that adds for real.

SPEAKER_00 28:28

We do have to do something.

SPEAKER_03 28:31

What?

SPEAKER_00 28:32

Like with this weight, it's it's taking over my life.

SPEAKER_03 28:36

Bitch, for real. If you see me, you will probably be like, what the fuck? Like, why?

SPEAKER_00 28:42

It can't be that bad, is it?

SPEAKER_03 28:44

It's not. And my co-workers fucking make me feel like I'm fucking huge and shit. Oh my god. Oh my god, you're fat. Oh, especially the fucking there's a lot of people actually, but I fuck with them. So, you know, there's there's people that I I work with who they make fun of me, right? I make fun of them, and it's just like a back and forth thing, but I fucks with them. So I give you I'm giving you a pass to make fun of me because I fucks with you. If I don't fuck with you and I don't know you, the minute you make fun of me, oh, it's going down, bitch.

SPEAKER_00 29:18

Right?

SPEAKER_03 29:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:19

You like fuck their dad or something just to get back to you.

SPEAKER_03 29:21

I know, yeah. No, but yeah, like, but there's some people they'd be making fun of me. They'd be like, you know, they'll be on the walkie-talkie or some shit, and I re and I reply to them, like, oh fuck you. And then the guy will be like, I don't know who that was, but he sounded fat.

SPEAKER_00 29:38

So they like that's funny. That's funny and petty. But I feel like our petty is funny. I would be like, hey guys, be careful. Don't say there's donuts in the office because art will go trembling over.

SPEAKER_03 29:54

Listen to your bitch. Oh, you you're hilarious.

SPEAKER_00 29:59

I am. I think it's more worse for me because I've seen you skinny. I've seen you fancy.

SPEAKER_03 30:05

Yeah, yeah. But don't worry. You know what? April. April is here. Well, today's the last day of March, right?

SPEAKER_00 30:13

Today, no. Today's April 1st, isn't it?

unknown 30:15

No.

SPEAKER_03 30:16

No, bitch, it's the 31st.

SPEAKER_00 30:17

Bitch, April Fools, it's tomorrow.

SPEAKER_03 30:20

Damn, that is true. Starting tomorrow, bitch. That's it. We said this March 1st, we didn't do shit. So, you know what? Starting tomorrow, March 1st, and we need to get on on something.

SPEAKER_00 30:34

And not dick art. That doesn't count.

SPEAKER_03 30:37

Not no. No, not on 63rd dick. In the back of Jillies, no. We're not doing that.

SPEAKER_00 30:43

Right. He'll just do it in the back of Walmart.

SPEAKER_03 30:46

Anyways.

SPEAKER_00 30:47

That's so trashy.

SPEAKER_03 30:49

That is so trashy. I would never in my life target maybe. Like, she don't love herself. Anyways, guys, thank you for listening to this little small, small little pod of ours. Yeah. It's pretty much this was a segment. This wasn't a podcast. It was a segment. It's like, have lunch with us.

SPEAKER_00 31:14

It is, yes.

SPEAKER_03 31:16

It's like hanging out with us during lunch. Hang out with us on lunch.

SPEAKER_00 31:20

Yeah, that's pretty much what it was. I think it was pretty good though.

SPEAKER_03 31:23

It really was. But my shit wasn't ready because of my phone. It wasn't charged and whatever.

SPEAKER_00 31:29

He was too busy popping his pussy, so.

unknown 31:33

Popping.

SPEAKER_00 31:35

Alright, well, thank you guys for listening and come back so we can have a chat.

SPEAKER_03 31:41

Yes, guys. Thank you so much for listening. And I will be putting this up maybe like during the week. Just you know, whatever. But thank you so much again for listening to the pod. And supporting us. Supporting us. Thank you, Sam, for eating that double cheese burger that you have in your mouth right now. And your large shake.

SPEAKER_00 32:04

I don't like milkshakes, bitch. Thanks. A lot of art for supposedly eating a salad, but we don't have to be a good thing. I was in the Southwest salad market side. That's a lot.

SPEAKER_03 32:13

Chicken, teriyaki chicken, okay, and clear American sweetened strawberry sparkling water.

SPEAKER_00 32:20

That was a coke.

SPEAKER_03 32:22

It was not a Coke. This is sparkling water, miha. Anyways, guys, thank you so much. And we will see you on the next one, Sam. Choke on a dick, please.

SPEAKER_00 32:33

Obviously, you didn't.

SPEAKER_03 32:37

Bye, guys. This is the public service announcement. If you're hearing this, then you're part of the problem. This podcast is problematic. Let's go.