Learn, Unlearn, Repeat

One of the greatest realizations about life is that growth is a continuous cycle of learning and unlearning—letting go of habits that no longer serve us while making space for ones that do.

In this episode, Alyse shares the habits she's intentionally building, the ones she's working to leave behind, and the small mindset shifts that have made the biggest difference. She also explores the concept of habit stacking—pairing a new, less enjoyable habit with one you already love—to make lasting change feel more natural and sustainable.

Transcript

Speaker 0:05

Hi guys, welcome back to another episode of Go Get Hers. I just got done watching the Real Housewives of Rhode Island Reunion, and I don't know if anyone else watches it, but I think that's one of the best uh Real Housewives franchises to exist. Mind you, I haven't watched not one other one. So I could be crazy saying that. But the amount of drama that's on that show for like no reason. Like sometimes I'm not I don't even remember why they're fighting, and it just seems like a whole bunch of just like nonsense. And I was explaining that to someone else. The reason why I haven't liked reality TV is because most of the drama is starts from people being dumb, and I just can't watch stuff where people are dumb and we're like supposed to laugh at it. Like that's my actually my beef with SpongeBob and Patrick is that he's just most characters that are that are funny on shows are just dumb, and I just can't I can't partake. I can't willingly partake. But yeah, but sometimes with these reality shows, it's just like these people are dumb, and so they're starting dumb drama that shouldn't even be happening. And I just maybe this is the healed version of me that I'm like, I don't find this shit entertaining, but um, but for them, for some reason I do not even entertaining, but it's just like delightful to watch. And then on the other spectrum of that, for TV, I did watch House of Dragons last night, and I'm not gonna say anything, but what the heck? I also shouldn't have been Googling. You should see my Google search, actually, when the show was starting. And this is all like very much public record and information because you know, we we've seen Game of Thrones. Like, this is the prequel. This is actually my my uh search history. I Googled it this or I screenshot it this morning because I was curious. Oliver Tree Death, which I just found out Oliver Oliver Tree, like the person that sings like When I'm Down and Life Goes On, died in a helicopter crash. Terrible and sad. And you know how I found that out? In Marshmallow's comments, because Marshmallow and Kelsey Ballerini are coming out with a new song. That's how I found out that he died. Because if someone said in the comments that he didn't care, didn't know, that marshmallow didn't care, didn't know, and then someone's like, No, he posted on his Instagram story. I'm like, this is lore that I've know nothing about. The Oliver Tree died. Here are my Google search in relations to House of the Dragon. How does Jace Targaryen die? How does Allison Hightower die? Does Amen die in House of Dragon? Because I can't stand him. Rainair Targaryen Death. How did the Targaryens die? Targaryen Family Tree. And then my last one was Glamping in Illinois. So you can see where my mind is. But yeah, I need the Targaryens and the Hightowers and or Team Green to wrap it up. And I know that's not how it necessarily ends. Um, but I think Googling all these things right before made the show less impactful for me. So I will not be doing that again. But now that I know the information, like I also thought they were gonna change a couple things. Clearly they're not. So um, if you haven't watched yet, I'm so sorry if you feel like this was a spoiler. I shouldn't have done a spoiler alert. And I know you're dying to ask me, have you watched Love Island? No, I will not be partaking in dumb people falling in love or not. But I have seen the clips of those two guys that clearly want each other and don't want the women that are there. So that's all I'm gonna say. I am chronically online to like get the gist, but I will not be partaking in watching Love Island, unfortunately. But what I am so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so happy about and glad about is that I no longer have to stomach and go on this dumb journey with Amanda and Wes any longer. Like, I am freed from the shackles of them being on my TV screen together and them just lying and giving half truths, and that you know that they're just like Wes specifically, he lies through omission. Like, he doesn't think omitting things and giving half truths is a lie. So I'm just tired of seeing him on a screen. I will say, I will make an omission. I know I've been the number one Wes hater, small hands hater. And typically, truly on paper, Wes Wilson should be my type. Should be my type. I love a redhead, I love a man with a beard, and he's six foot tall. And I've heard he looks bigger in person. Like I like a linebacker football-esque size man. So on paper, he should be my type. But there's something about his little hands or something about him that really gives me. He reminds me of one of my exes, actually. I'm not gonna say the one who, but he does for some reason remind me of one of them. And now that I've clocked that, I can't get it out of my head that he's just like a little man with a temper tantrum. And by little, I just mean like a little boy inside with a temper tantrum. Um, that can't, that gets off on kind of well, Wes specifically, not my ex, but gets off on like conquering hot women because he act low-key resents them and he's figured out how to, you know, he's like just just be their friend. Like I think he he recognizes that being their friend is his like superpower, you know. Anyways, I I didn't want to I didn't want to talk about Wes Wilson today. I really didn't. But my admission though, is that when he they did like that last little after summer house thing when he sat down with Kyle, I texted one of my friends, the one that I have been um mostly talking shit about Wes with and about how he looks. I did tell her, I said, now why is this the episode where I find Wes Wilson attractive? And she was like, you know, I that's so funny because now I just can't do it. I was like, no, but I think the problem with me with him is that I could always kind of see or tell that he was like trying to be something that he's not. The scarves and the hats and the he never dressed like that. That wasn't his style. That's his stylist, but that's not him. You know what I mean? That's who he thinks he wants to embody and how he thinks he wants to dress or how he wants to dress, but that's not actually his style. But I am a very simple chic gal. And I realized one time at a Cubs game that my type is a man with tattoos and a black shirt and a chain, and that's exactly what he had on talking to Kyle. And I was like, he's cute actually, and he had on the hat. So all those things combined, I could see it for a minute. Now knowing what I know, uh, you know, I couldn't, but he did it for me that one day, anyways, and I'll and I'll admit that I'm I'm not I'm I'm woman enough to um admit that. So anyways, I was talking to one of my friends lately about like habits, and like I just feel like me and my friends constantly talk about like discipline and habits and how do you balance this and how do you do this, like just a t a continuous topic of conversation because we are also busy, also I think make look make balancing things look easy when it's when it's not. It's a it's a it's a I mean it's a balancing act. It's choosing where to put your energy, where to take your energy away from, like constantly making sacrifices, like just the balancing act of like all these things is hard. And habits and learning habits and not learning habits and unlearning habits um is a very like intentional thing the older that we get. And I've come to realize that I really have spent my whole entire life learning and unlearning habits. And with that being said, it actually perplexes me how people just go through life and don't think that they've have room to learn anything more or room to grow, because that's essentially what life is is learning and unlearning habits, healthy habits, unhealthy habits, adapting to people's mannerisms, maneuvering through situations, even bad habits with yourself, bad habits in relationships, bad habits in whatever it may be. Like life is learning and learning habits. And I think for me, for like from like a psychology pinpoint, too, I'm thinking like some things you're picking up subconsciously, consciously, even down to like reciting TikTok sounds. You know what I mean? Like you are subconsciously storing that information in your brain and not realizing it, like the Drake thing now that's like transcending the game. That's all I've been saying. Have I ever made a TikTok using that sound? No. Have I ever commented on one? No. But I've heard it enough times that now is a part of my vocabulary. Like that's a habit now that, and it's small and it's dumb, but that is a habit. Like kind of made me think about I again have been doing this forever. Learning habits, unlearning habits, and whether they're good or they're bad. And actually, I recently, I don't know if I said this last episode, but I recently just stopped going to therapy. And I was in therapy for five years, and I'm so happy about what what therapy taught me and what therapy did for me. I think it made it much more manageable for me to manage my emotions, know what emotions are worth pouring into, which ones are not. My therapist would probably not agree that that's how I should be phrasing it though. But I do think that that is a it's there's a truth to that. To me, my greatest thing was managing my emotions and how other people make me make me feel. And I feel like I'm still constantly learning and navigating, navigating through that every single day. Because the one thing that my therapist has ever taught me is that the hardest thing about going to therapy is navigating a world where other people are not. And that is so true. Because I think a majority of the things was how navigating how other people treated me. Not necessarily that I was, I'm obviously not absolved from that. I was doing everything right or I do everything right, but a lot of my issues stemmed with how other people treated me for being a certain way and how I let that affect my life and outward. Knowing those habits, learning how to navigate through those and making a very big inward change has, I think, changed my life. And where I got to the point where I stopped going to therapy was because, or how I recognized it is because I felt like I was going to therapy, beating a dead horse. Like a lot of things that I would talk about in therapy were things that were bothering me that I couldn't fix. Like I can only do so much as a human and recognizing when like I have this, like I don't I don't have any solution. Like talking about it, yes, it's therapeutic, but it was also kind of making me upset and kind of putting me in a bad mood because I'm like, I'm just rehashing things that I have no control over. And I'm waiting for either people to do the right thing, or I'm waiting for God to step in, the universe to step in, to for whoever to step in to make something shake, and I have no control over that. And honestly, talking about it and rehashing it when I have no control over about it is not doing what to me, it's honestly it's almost more deregulating to me. It's not helping me regulate my symptoms or my like my emotions because I I true I have nothing. Like I can't do it, like I've I have come to terms with what things are, and I it and it is what it is, you know. So that's where I landed. And I also did like soft launch that conversation and that to my therapist, and she was the one that was like, Yeah, so why still be in therapy? And I was like, that's exactly where I was going with that. And I'm glad that I am at the point where I feel like I don't need anymore. Like, not that I'm healed, I don't think you're ever healed, but just having the tools in order to learn and unlearn habits and friendships, relationships, etc. And again, I'm still learning, but it just made me think that how that's just like a greater lesson and a greater navigation between your 20s and 30s. And I remember my very first bad habit that I had to intentionally break. Because I feel like some habits you like, whatever. You know, you drop. Like one of actually one of my guy friends has said to me, he was like, the thing I love about you is that you can be obsessed with something, love it, love it, love it, and then you'll just drop it like it never existed. And it's a it's a blessing and a curse because I don't like that I'm that way. Again, I think this is my Gemini moon. I don't like that I'm that way, but it does come in handy sometimes. It does. Like when a guy, when I get my heartbroken or guy's no longer serving me, or friendships no longer serving me, I haven't thought about you in a day. Like you think we have beef, but we actually don't have any beef because I don't think about you at all. I don't think about what happened. I can rehash what happened, but I've let go that you no longer serve me and the purpose that you're supposed to serve my life. It was for time for a season or a reason no longer, no longer applicable. And I'm okay with that. I'm fine with that. I was obsessed with banana flavored things. I'm still obsessed with banana banana flavored things. Something that's banana flavored, I'm always gonna get it. I actually just went to an influencer event and they have banana old fashions, and it they were pretty delicious. I really, really enjoyed it. But I was like making a series on TikTok about banana flavored things and trying banana flavored things in Chicago. And this girl that I'm like a mutual with, and by mutual, I mean like we were friends, like we follow each other on TikTok. Never met her, don't really know her. Honestly, I'm just gonna be completely honest. This is a safe space, at least it is for me. I only followed her back because she's black, but I don't I hate her videos so much. I can't even tell you actually. So maybe I should just like go ahead and unfollow. But when I posted about having a banana espresso martini at um DJ's great room, she had the mitigated gallant audacity to comment and she was like, I love this, but you have an unhealthy relationship with bananas. I have a what now? I have unhealthy You used the word unhealthy to describe the fact that I like a certain flavor for a fruit and you don't know me. Don't ever comment on my shit ever again. Isn't that I just thought that was a very odd choice of words. You could be like, girl, you're like my friends have been like, girl, you're gonna turn into a banana. That's fine. But don't you ever say I have an unhealthy relationship with bananas? That is crazy. That is crazy. But, anyways, back to learning and unlearning habits. My very first bad habit that I had to break, intentionally break, was sucking my thumb. I sucked my thumb till I was in about, I don't know, seventh grade. I think I got braces. No, no, no, not seventh. I got braces when I was eight for the first time. I had braces twice. And then I never wore my retainer, so my teeth have shifted. And I, of course, I'm one of those millennials that also needs, I need um Invisalign and I really want to get it. And every year at the top of the year I say I'm gonna get it, and then I don't. When I, to be honest, when I know it's my engagement year, I'll get it. You know what I mean? Or not even my engagement year, like my wedding year, I'll get it. But anyways, um, I had to intentionally break me sucking my thumb. I think I stopped sucking my thumb when I was like in when I was like eight, seven or eight. And my brother, too, at the time that was is six old years older than me, was sucking his finger still too. And so he's the one that was like, Look, we're gonna stop sucking our thumb. We're gonna, I might have stopped and sucked my thumb when I had braces, dude, still. Like, yeah. It would, but it's either way, you should know it's much longer than it should have been. Like, I was a full grown child and I was still sucking my thumb. And he was like, Look, we're gonna stop sucking. He was like, We're gonna stop sucking our thumbs, we're gonna stop. Like, he was like, We're gonna, we're gonna fix this because you need to stop. I need to stop. He's like, I'll buy you something, or I'll make mom and dad buy you something at the end of the 30 days. And so that was when I first became aware that like after 28 or 30 days is that when you break a bad habit. And maybe that's something he learned in school or something, I don't know, because I was so young, but we did do the whole like band-aid trick um on my thumb, put it in like alcohol remover or nail remover or whatever, and it worked. And I remember being like, wow, actually, if I stick to something for 28 days, I can break the habit. What a crazy way to live and what a crazy life. And I just remember that just being the very first intentional habit I had to break. Then now in my adulthood, like I know that changing is possible if you give yourself 30 days. And when I think about habits and bad habits, I will say that, and this is trigger warning because I'm gonna talk about like weight but and body image, but I have, and I'm not gonna stay on this for too long, but I have been, I feel like on a weight loss journey for a while. I always tell people when you turn 30, it comes to 20 pounds. At least it did for me. I feel like my hormones or my digestive system just like stopped. It was with the like the Titanic, like it already hit the iceberg and then it started backpedaling, or they tried to turn the motor off and then they started like to go backwards or turn too late. And that's how I feel about my um my digestive system. And it could be hormonal, it could be a lot of things. I mean, I have I feel like historically have blamed it on like my ex-boyfriends. I'm like, that motherfucker was stressing me out, my cortisol was high. Like, no, you were eating out a lot, and that's okay, and that's okay, but I think it got to a point where I just didn't feel well, what made me recognize it was that there were a couple of things where I was like, I think this is related to this. Like I can't, I can no longer ignore that this might be linked to some to my weight gain. Like, I don't think this is coincidence, and I'm very good at pattern recognition, right? Like I've said, like it only takes something to happen like once or twice for me to be like, I think this is related. There's a correlation between it. And so for me, I just was like, okay, now I have to kind of be honest with myself about what am I doing that's different than what I was doing before. It could be hormonal, it could be all this, but there's a point where I need to take accountability in this and break what other habit is I formed and create healthier, more intentional habits to be more um, be more active because clearly my body needs it. I just need to kick it up knots, right? Like I used to, I was in palms when I was in high school. So I was constantly doing cardio, constantly working out. Like, dude, I used to eat two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches before practice. And that was, but that was I could do that because I was burning so many calories. And again, I mean, but I'm a child also. In my 20s, I think I took advantage of the fact that like I could drink a lot and I could do this and and stay out late and you know, drink all day and then go to work and be fine and whatever. Like they're two different things, and I just recognize that like my body changes, and as my body changes, and as I get older, my habits are gonna have to change and adapt. And I'm fine with that. So I think this story is funny. I just think it's hilarious. But one of the things that I think when it came to that, that I had to recognize was that maybe I should check my calories just to know. Like it's power and knowledge and power in knowing that, like, if I'm doing everything that I'm supposed to be doing, and I then I need to go to the doctor to get my hormones checked. That's one thing. But if I am, because I thought I was under eating too. Like I was making up of so many excuses. And it came down to the fact that like I was overeating and I was overeating because of Chick-fil-A salads. That's the part that I think is funny. Chick-fil-A salads are like 700, 800 calories. I was thinking they were 300, 400 calories. I'm like, it's a salad, right? What can a salad do? I was using Chick-fil-A salads to substantiate myself in between going out to dinner. So like I would was eating at like odd times. I would eat lunch maybe at two, and then I was going to dinner maybe at 7:30. So then I would have like a salad at like four, but also I was eating like snacks. So they weren't like full meals. And so the salad is 800 calories with the dressing, because of the dressing. I was also ordering fry. I'm like, ooh, girl dinner, you know? And then I was also going out to eat, which you know, and going out to eat salt, the X, Y, and Z, X, Y, and Z. When I found out that that Chick-fil-A salad was 700 calories, I can't even tell you what my face looked like. And I just think this is hilarious. That, like, remember telling my friend Corinne, because I was like, I don't really want to track my calories because I don't really want to get down into the dirty of this, because um, it could be like I just don't want to fall because again, I can I can either obsess over something or I can like do it for two weeks and drop it. Corinne, I think everyone, like before your wedding, you're more intentional with what you eat, how you want to look in your dress, whatever. And uh Corinne had previously just gotten married. And so, and she looked amazing. She always looks amazing, but she looked so toned, beautiful, gorgeous. She accomplished what she needed to to to accomplish. Like she looked great. So she was like, at least do it for two weeks. Then you'll know how much stuff, how many calories. And then you move on. Then then you need to drop it. Like, seriously. And I'm gonna check in and see if you drop it. So I did it. And it is true, you know. But when I first put it in, I was like, there's no way. And I was heavily working out. I was heavily going, I was going to sculpt three times a week. I was like, why am I not losing weight? Like, I should be shedding, I should be dropping weight for how much for how active I was. It was my eating habits. My eating habits needed to change. And I now feel like I just make more. Not that I ever just restrict myself. I don't believe in restricting yourself. This morning, past three days, I've wanted a donut for breakfast that's also like with electrolytes, that's also with egg whites. Like I'm also eating protein afterwards. But I'm like, you know what? I want something sweet. I wake up, I want something sweet. And maybe that's bad because maybe my blood sugar is low in the morning. Whatever. We'll figure that out another time. But like, I'm okay with that. But that did instill this brain blast in me about being like, I just think I need to change and learn and unlearn some habits now that I know information and now that I know I have what I want to address. Lately, I've been having migraines the week before when I start my period. I'm like, okay, now at least the week before, you need to be taking magnesium. You need to be up in your water intake, especially doing electrolytes. Also a little tidbit for electrolytes, if that I do every morning now. I do I did start taking creatine lately. So I'll do creatine and actually Kendall from Peloton said to make an at-home electrolyte drink, because I can't stand like the flavored electrolytes. I do agave, because for the sugar, salt, lemon, and just water. And then I add the creatine to it, shake it up, and I drink four of them a day. Not four in that way. I start off with the electrolyte drink, let it deplenish, then fill it up, just a little tidbit. All that to say is that building habits and changing your habits is going to be a constant thing and it's going to take consistency. So with that, in and I've lost like 10, 12 pounds, like and I'm proud of that. And I'm and I and I'm still working towards when I work out. But it took a lot of like, okay, I'm going to start walking more in the spring. So now that when I wake up now in the summer, it's now a habit. It's now a habit. It's a healthy habit. Because I was like, how can I? I being skinny all my life and being like a twig. And mind you, like I wanted to gain weight in high school or in college. I'm like, the freshman 15 should should should be afraid of me because I'm about to eat everything in this calf because I would like to have a little bit more assets. Like now my boobs are like humongous and I hate it. But and that's okay. But um, but I would like to gain weight. That's and that's how I and that's how I thought. I was like, I don't want to be necessarily a string be, which is I just want to give the caveat that me talking about body type and whatever is not to shame how anyone else's body type is. I'm talking from my personal, I know this is a very sensitive subject. I know I'm out from my personal experience and how I feel and how I generally just like to feel in my body what I would like to look like to look like. When I was skinny, I wasn't big enough. When I was like, and I think of unfortunately that is a peril of being a woman. Um, I looked at other women, I'm like, I wish I was more curvy, I wish I had boobs, I had wish I had this, that, and the other. Now I'm like, I'll take these. Actually, I mean I I love them, but I'm like, it just sluts up every single outfit, and I don't want to do that necessarily. It's annoying. So there's no, there's no medium. So my now priority is to just create habits that make me feel healthy and make me feel good in my skin. So that's where I'm coming from. I just want to give that caveat that there's no, I don't have opinion one way or the other. Just to be clear, I'm just doing what feels good for me right now. And so um, that also goes with Asia's episode when she was like, you need to be strength training. That is something you do need to implement in your 30s. I have never strength trained in my life or wasn't, and so that was a a habit I had to introduce into my lifestyle. Um, is that I need to be weightlifting. And so I started going to going to Boonda, which I love now and really look forward to, and think it's an excellent workout. Again, back to the walking, I would start working out or walk more in May to then like become a habit in June. I just think I'm at that age too where I'm just so cognizant now of the things that are going in my body, especially too. The more things get rolled back with the this current administration, the more I'm like skeptical about what I'm eating and what I'm buying. And so I've been more doing more of a whole foods diet at home. Processed meat, especially processed meat in the morning, I don't think goes well with me. You I've always had beef with chicken. I just read that flam that chicken's is flammatory. I'm not surprised at all because of the antibiotics. I think there's no way to actually avoid the antibiotics in chicken. Like, I just don't believe them when it comes to chicken for some reason. Like, if you want a chicken conspiracy theorist, that is me, unfortunately. Just again, have just made these small tweaks that I are now habits that now I don't even have to think about anymore. They're they're they're now subconscious things that I've learned that are for my betterment, that have made honestly my lifestyle even more balanced, to be honest. That now I feel like if I fall off kilter, I can easily hop back on. That if I like have a burger, have pizza four days in a row, I'm like, I don't care. I'll just like it's instilled in me that like I know this is temporary. I'll get back to my lifestyle in a minute. Even going on vacation, like you're obviously gonna eat differently than you eat at home. I'm down to do that in general, in the overview of habits and creating habits, lifestyle. Um, you know what Kanye says? Amin is the first step. So I think that there are three ways to overly change a habit, whether it's good, bad, learn, unlearn. First one, recognizing whether it's a good habit or a bad habit. But like I said, like Kanye says, Amin is the mini is the first step. I think honestly, in identifying what something is a bad habit is recognizing, like maybe is it detrimental to your health? Is the baby that you're doing giving you a cough? Like, is there something that's correlating between two things? You know what I mean? Um, does this habit hurt people close to you? Do you feel guilty for this habit? Is it like lacking your productivity? And then obviously the steps to change the habit, you've already done the first one, honestly. And is the first step. And then acknowledging what is feasible in order to break that habit or change the cycle. So let's say it's something, a different habit of like, okay, I want to post more on social media again the cadence of posting more on social media. Like you can make a goal of saying you want to post every day, but is that feasible for you? Is that gonna make you feel like you're a failure? Uh, because maybe your consistency only looks like two or three days a week rather than seven. Like maybe that's all you have the bandwidth for, right? Or maybe you're trying to break a bad habit of scrolling. Like, so maybe you take baby steps, like you get a brick first, like one of those things that like locks your phone and then you use it every Sunday, one day a week. Be like, okay, I'm gonna do it while get used to it while I'm just cleaning or doing something else that like I'm occupied, so I'm not really thinking about my phone. And then maybe do it every night after a certain time. And then you'll probably eventually get into the habit of not being on your phone where you don't need the brick anymore. You know? Um, again, I've I've talked about the fact that I used to like kind of like side-eye people who had to delete Instagram and for long periods of time because I think I I I delete Instagram for weeks or months, like once a year, because I'm like, I need a break, and this is like brain rot to me. And um, but now I realize again, like it there's such strength in that acknowledging that's like I actually don't have the bandwidth for this right now. This is actually like too much for me. And I think that's just like a I think that's actually a very powerful habit to acknowledge. And then the third one would be breaking habits take time, like be patient. I think in the weight loss journey, consistency is everything. Like, I didn't see any changes for a while, especially in the scale. And that's actually something too I never wanted to do. Like I never wanted to obsess over the number on the scale when I knew that my like for me, my testament, my clothes fit great. Like, I'm wearing more of my wardrobe now because my clothes fit. But changing a habit takes time. It does take like a minimum of 28, 30 days to break a habit. And the discipline and the consistency and the mind work that it takes to keep that up, though, is even harder. And also, too, in in these habits, I'm not talking about like things that are like a disease. So, like the you that is your brain chemistry, so which is like alcoholism, etc. But when you get to a point where you feel like it's not working, it probably is. It probably is. And again, this could be in relationships, because this could be like speaking your peace more, um, standing like standing up for yourself more, like acknowledging your boundaries more. And I actually just want to say this I know that conversations around body and body image are sensitive, especially when there's like an ozempicemic happening. And I do think to a degree though, we would kind of be doing a disservice to not talk about how common it is to gain weight as a result of your home hormone shifting the older that you get. I think because we don't know who's sensitive, don't know who's not, we're always afraid to talk about it. And it's one of those things that, you know, when you turn 28 and you semi-go through a second puberty, people are shocked. They're like, why is no one talking about this? Well, because, you know, body image is a sensitive topic and a sensitive issue. Why at 30 do I have to try harder to lose weight, or why is it much harder for the weight to come off? Well, because you're hormone, this, that, and the other. Like, there is a biological and hormonal component to weight gain and changes in body type, or even, you know, and I'm, you know, proud of my woman body. Like I joke, like, these boobs gotta go. But I mean, when I was 14 is when I was flat-chested. Like now my body probably thinks, oh, time for a baby, time to use these things to care for your child. You know, like there is a biological component to it. And so I think it would be doing a disservice not to talk about that and how that also plays into habits and changes in your 30s and adapting your habits and changing your habits. And again, like adding strength training into your workout plan or eating more clean more frequently because of like our body just can't process processed food as much or as good as anymore. Like keeping or you know, limiting sugar intake. Like, I feel like I've limited my sugar, all these, and mind you, I don't even know if this shit's fucking working. I'm just doing what I think is better and best for my health and how I want to feel. I'm just saying that again, I think it's a disservice though, to not talk about how because of age, how these things and when you think about longevity of age and longevity of life, quality of life, how sometimes as a woman, our hormones and the consequences of our hormones are a proponent in changing habits, learning unlearning habits, et cetera, et cetera. One thing that was trending on TikTok or social media, like beginning the year, end of last year was habit stacking. And I don't know if I've talked about it before, but habit stacking is pairing something that you hate doing with something you love doing to then create a more productive habit or um to like increase the dopamine to where you now your body or your mind associates those things together. And in my mind, I'm like two birds, one stone. So honestly, what I said earlier about how I add my creatine to my electrolytes to my water, I drink a lot of water a day, but when I thought about adding something else, like having a having to single out one of my water intakes to be creatine or to put it in a, you know, to putting it in a cup and then drinking it like that, or putting a packet of electrolytes into a separate glass, that just wasn't working for me mentally. So I'm like, okay, well I'll just put it all together. I fill up my water bottle as soon as I wake up. I just add the electrolytes, add the creatine, and then I've gotten that out of the way for the rest of the day, right? That's habit stacking. When I go on walks, honestly, I make my to-do list of everything that I have to do every single day. And I either pair it with like listening to music too, because I mean I love walking, but sometimes it gets mundane, you know? So I'll walk and I'll make my to-do list of everything that I have to do. So when I get back home, like I know exactly what I'm organized and I know exactly what I need to get into. And I do that with like content and being organized. I think someone recently asked me, like, how do you stay so organized, or how do you like plan out what you want to post? And it is kind of deliberate. Even too, people have asked me for my podcast, how do you know what to talk about? I actually do I use Notion and I do write out each episode high levels of what I want to talk about. Sometimes I'll add like nitty-gritty like jokes if I have one in my head at that moment that I know I might forget, but I'll also again stack that with my walk. So I'm being productive. Two birds, one stone. Um, when I I do this little arm workout sequence. Again, I hate that I keep talking about like fitness and stuff, but I'm just like more so on my my my wellness journey. And this is very different for me. Like I hate working, I used to hate working out, and I could get away with not working out. So this is something that I've had to like reprogram my brain into acknowledging that like this is a good thing, this is a fun thing, you have to like this because this is your health and your longevity in life and your well-being. And so I love watching TV. I've said that before. I spend a lot of time watching TV. So, and I hate, but I hate singling on a workout. Like, unless I go to a workout class, I'm not working out. I know that about myself. So lately I have my weights on my counter. And lately, when I watch TV, I will just get up and just do the workout, like the mini arm sequence that I have been doing lately while I'm watching TV, because it makes I associate it now with like when I start a show, knocked out the way, then I can sit my ass down. Even like chores, listening to a podcast, audiobook, etc. When I'm in the morning, I usually either do my dishes right at night or like at night before I go to bed, like when I get back from a workout or something, because in my mind, I'm like, my clothes are already dirty, so I might as well dirty them up again while I'm doing dishes. Or I do it right when I wake up because I'm like in my pajamas. I'm like, these pajamas are going in the in the laundry anyway, so I might as well do it. I always listen to like chill lo-fi study beats to where like I hate doing dishes. So it presents like a calming um atmosphere while I'm doing dishes to where I like forget about it. Or if I'm FaceTiming my mom, I always wash dishes. So I was like, I can't hear you with water running. Sorry, babe, that's just how it has to be because I hate washing dishes and I need something to distract me. Like I enjoy talking to you. I hate washing dishes. That's just how um it's going to be. So you can try to find something that, like when you're again just still instilling or learning a different habit or trying to incorporate a different habit into your life, try pairing it with something you hate doing, um, or you love doing, sorry, that makes it more you get more dopamine out of it, and it feels less like like a musk or a task and more like something that you actually want to do and something that's going to create longevity and um, you know, something that's practical and substantial in your life. Because I think that's a thing with habits, and again, like learning and unlearning habits, and especially in the sense, is it feasible or not? Do I like it's not that you're lazy, it's just how can I put this and maintain this into my routine? The last thing I also want to have say about habits is that I actually just realized something that I feel like I'm working on, and that I think has become an unconscious habit. I'm conscious of it, but it snuck into me unconsciously is I do feel like sometimes when I'm in a discussion with someone, I will interrupt them because I used to hang out with people who used to do that to me. So now I feel like in order to get a word in edgewise, and before I forget, I have to like I'm I'm waiting for them to end so I can remember, but then I preemptedly cut them off. And I hate that I do that, but it's something that I'm actually like a habit that I'm unlearning because people used to do it to me. And I remember how frustrating it used to feel, and then it made me be like, and then when I was interacting with them, it made me have to be comfortable interrupting them because they did it to me, not knowing if they were conscious consciously knew they were doing it to me, but then it became a habit, and then I'm trying to unlearn. And I think I don't know if that's normal, but admitting is the first step, acknowledging is the first step, self-awareness is everything. So I just also want to give a little tidbit of a social habit that I am working on. And so my friends, I've done that too. I'm so sorry. I love you, I love you, I love you. It's not that you're not important or that I don't care what you have to say. It's just I'm I'm really sorry, I'm emotionally scarred. I'm being dramatic, but you know what I mean. But, anyways, that is the end of the episode. Thank you guys so much for listening. My name is Alyse and this is Go Get Hers, and I'll see you next week. Bye.