The Food Allergy Brain Episode 8: Q&A with Mia

This week on The Food Allergy Brain, Mia goes solo for a highly requested Q&A episode, answering your most burning questions about what it's really like to live with over 50 food allergies through the lens of mental health, relationships, and everyday life.

Mia opens up about her therapy journey and how CBT, radical acceptance, and a consistent self-care routine have helped her build stability, especially in the aftermath of anaphylaxis. She gets candid about what makes anaphylaxis so traumatizing, how she distinguishes an anxious response from an actual reaction, and why finding a food allergy-specialized psychologist in high school changed everything for her. The conversation also covers friendships, dating, allyship, traveling with allergies, and the emotional rollercoaster of food challenges.

The episode closes with Mia reflecting on the defining moments that shaped her mindset, including the allergist who told her she'd likely never outgrow her allergies, and the TikTok she posted in response that started it all.

Find Mia Silverman (Allergies with Mia): 

Instagram & TikTok: @allergieswithmia 

Website: allergieswithmia.com

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Welcome to the Food Allergy Brain. I'm your host, Mia Silverman, Food Allergy Advocate, Content Creator, and Master's student in clinical psychology. This podcast explores the mental and emotional side of living with food allergies through conversations with experts and people doing important work in this space. Before we begin, please remember that everything discussed on this podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice. For questions about your own health, food allergies, or treatment, always consult with a qualified doctor or medical professional. Alright, hi everyone, welcome back to the podcast. Today we're gonna be doing something a bit different. We're gonna be doing a solo episode, which is surprisingly very highly requested. And I'm not gonna lie, this is definitely out of my comfort zone, but so is starting this podcast. So why not just go all in at this point? So today I'm gonna be doing a QA because even though I don't have the capacity to answer every single message and question I get, I do read all of your comments except the hate comments, and I do read all of your DMs. So I thought, why not do a QA answering all of your burning questions about how I personally live with over 50 allergies, specifically in the context of mental health and how I navigate that, how I navigate friendships, dating, traveling, all of the above. I first just want to say thank you to everyone who's taking the time out of their busy lives and scheduled to listen to my podcast. This has been a really amazing experience for me. It's also been a quite a learning experience, too, because I'm kind of learning along the way. Starting a podcast was something I never I've wanted to do for so long, but just never had the courage to actually do it. And so to receive such positive feedback and for people to actually really enjoy this podcast and learn so much from it means so much to me. So again, thank you to everyone who's listening to this. It really means a lot. So I decided to do an Instagram story post a while ago, just asked, just and did like a little questionnaire box thing and asked people to ask me anything. And you guys definitely delivered, which is so awesome. And so my job as a food allergy advocate is to discuss all things pertaining to allergies, especially when it comes to the mental health impacts of food allergies. I want to make a quick disclaimer that there will be topics in this episode that might be a bit sensitive or a bit heavy, topics about PTSD, anaphylaxis, um, anxiety. So if any of these things are triggering to you, like please listen or proceed with caution. And I want to also just say that everyone's experience with allergies are different. This is just my personal journey and my experience. And so please take what I say with a grain of salt. And as I've mentioned in my intro, to always consult with a board-certified medical professional about these sorts of things. So we're gonna jump right into it and talk about therapy, anxiety, trauma. And the first question that I was asked is what's been your most helpful form of therapy as someone with food allergies? Again, everybody is different, and this is just what works for me. So I want to give some background. I've been in therapy since I was in the fourth grade. And so that's, and I'm now 23. That's a very long time of being in therapy. And so I already feel as though I'm at an advantage because I have been taught at such a young age to really look inward to do the work for my mental health. And so I feel like I already had some skills to kind of work with, but obviously I'm human. I'm not perfect. There's things I need to improve on. And so it wasn't until I was in high school that I started seeing a food allergy specialized psychologist. And she has changed my life. I actually ran into her at an allergy conference a few weeks ago and I started crying because she really changed my life, and I really mean that. And so back in high school, I experienced, I believe, like five or six anaphylactic reactions. And so whenever the ambulance would come to my campus, people would always just assume, oh, it's probably Mia. And I think 90% of the time it was me. And, you know, when you experience so many anaphylactic reactions, you're bound to, at least for me personally, experience a lot of PTSD and anxiety from it. And so the goal of seeing this food allergy psychologist was to help work on that, as well as being able to distinguish whether something I was experiencing is anaphylaxis or anxiety. We're actually gonna get into that a little bit later in this episode. So, yeah, so I was seeing this food allergy psychologist throughout my high school years, and then eventually I didn't really need her anymore because she kind of did her job, and I feel as though now as an adult, I can navigate and cope with my anxiety. That being said, I am still in therapy just for like weekly therapy, because I am still a very anxious person. And the therapist I've been seeing now since I believe I was a freshman in college, she specifically focuses on anxiety, depression, and grief. And, you know, the most helpful therapeutic modality that has worked for me is CBT or cognitive behavioral therapy. And for those that may not be familiar with what CBT is, it's a structured, goal-oriented therapeutic approach that's kind of like talk therapy that treats mental health and it identifies and modifies negative thoughts, behaviors, and emotional responses. And one thing that I've been working on, not only when I was seeing my food allergy psychologist, but now my current therapist is working on trusting myself and developing the skills to become more confident in myself and have self-compassion. And that's one thing that I've really learned a lot from therapy that's been really helpful is the idea of like radical acceptance, self-compassion, and giving yourself a lot of grace because, you know, going through an anaphylactic reaction is really hard and really traumatizing. Then having to deal with the aftermath of that just mentally is really difficult. And so learning how to give yourself grace and be kind and patient with yourself is such an important skill to have. And so I feel like I really learned that when I was in therapy, and even to this day while I'm still in therapy. Some specific coping strategies that I have been taught from seeing my food allergy psychologist, now a regular therapist, is a lot of doing like self-care in my everyday life. And by having a routine and having a toolbox of self-care things that I do every day, it kind of helps me when I go through a difficult time, like having an anaphobic reaction, because I know what I need to do to take care of myself and bring myself back to kind of like this homeostasis, like kind of level where I feel stable. And so there's five things that I really try to do consistently. The first one I think is just your morning routine. I used to wake up every single day, and the first thing I would do is check my phone and go straight to Instagram or TikTok and scroll for a very long time. And that is something that I have been very not ashamed of because again, I gave myself grace for that, because it's a very, they're both very addicting apps. And as someone that works in social media, it's so tempting to just go on these apps first thing in the morning and like seeing like what's trending, what's popular, new content ideas, seeing what your friends have posted. But I've learned that that is not healthy and it's not normal to be able to just consume so much content the minute you wake up. So I've decided to be more intentional with my morning routine. I wake up, I don't check my phone actually at all for like an hour. And I go, I go make my bed, I make myself a cup of tea, brush my teeth, get dressed, do my skincare, and I just drink my tea, go outside for a walk, stare out the window, and just ponder and reflect. And no music in the background, no stimulation of any kind. And that to me has really helped calm my nervous system down and help me have a good start to my day. And I do the same thing at night as well, where an hour before I go to bed, I turn off my phone, I put it away so I can't reach it or access it. And I have some tea, I read my book, or I just kind of ponder and go to bed. Um, another thing that I do is spending time with loved ones, friends, and family, people that, you know, make me feel as though I don't really have allergies and I feel quote unquote normal. I think the word normal is not the best word to describe it, but I feel as though I don't have allergies when I'm with these specific people. And that to me is really meaningful because I feel as though I always have to be aware of my allergies at all times. And so to be with people that just get it, I am able to turn my brain off for a little bit, and that is so relaxing and so like beneficial for my mental health. I also journal almost every day. And it doesn't have to be about allergies specifically, but I just journal about my feelings, my my hopes, my dreams, things that are going on in my life that are on my mind. I also, you know, really prioritize moving my body. I think exercise, just like scientifically, it's been proven that it releases the same, like it releases dopamine, uh happy hormones. And I think that just moving your body is a great way to release tension, stress, anxiety. And it's also just like, I feel like you feel so good after you go for a workout. Maybe doing a workout, like the thought of doing a workout is like, ugh, I don't want to do. But once you actually complete the workout, you feel so accomplished and you feel so good after. So the final thing that I do to help me just navigate life with allergies, but also just my everyday life to help me feel a sense of stability is focusing on what I can control. Because at the end of the day, having food allergies is really out of my control. I did not ask for this, I did not want this, but that's just the way my life is right now. And so what I do focus on is things that I can do to make myself happy. So again, spending time with friends, family, moving my body, journaling, and then also focusing on the foods I can eat. Because at the end of the day, food is fuel. And, you know, we live in a society where food is entertainment, food is part of our culture. It's a very popular thing. And I think that yes, food is awesome, but I think you can also reframe the way you view food, at least for me, and view it as something that just like fuels my body, and I can still enjoy the foods that I can eat. And so I just focus on what I can eat because that is what I can control. I like I cannot tell my body to stop being allergic to something. I wish I could because that would be awesome, but I can't. So those are some things that I learned in therapy that really helped me. And so when I'm going through an anaphylactic reaction or the aftermath of it mentally, by me having these routines and self-care tasks that I do every day, being able to like navigate that after an anaphylactic reaction gives me a sense of stability. I feel like there's some normalcy. Like, yes, obviously I'm gonna feel really distraught and and traumatized, but I still have a routine that I've established and that makes me feel like, okay, at least there's something consistent in my life, and it's in my control. So that's really important. On the topic of anaphylaxis, a common question I get asked is what's the most traumatic part of anaphylaxis? And there's not just one part of it that is traumatic, there's a lot of things, but I'm gonna list a few to me that are the most traumatic parts of it. The first one is that every experience is different. Every anaphylactic experience you go through is not gonna be the same. It's not gonna happen in the same place, same time, same food. It's going to be very different, at least in my case. And so because it's always different, I have no time to prepare myself for it. And it just happens out of nowhere, and it really, really, really catches me off guard. It's like from zero to a hundred, like you're just thrown into the deep end of a pool without any experience of how to swim. That that's what it feels like. And so be put in that position where you're just like thrown into something without any preparation is so scary and just again really catches me off guard. And that's the part that's difficult. It's because if the same, if if anaphylaxis was the same thing every single time, I feel like I would be, I would not feel as traumatized after every experience. Because every experience is different, I feel like I have to like process that as a whole new experience. And it's a whole new traumatic experience for me. And that's a really big issue or a big challenge of mine is navigating that. On top of being put in an experience that is, you know, out of nowhere, catches you off guard, is the loss of control. I am a control freak. I like to make sure I am in control of things that I can control. So when my body is now fighting for its life out of nowhere, I feel powerless and I feel scared. And not being in control of your own body is a very weird and just uncomfortable and scary experience because there's nothing you can do to stop it unless you use epinephrine, which you must use if you're going into anaphylaxis. But I can't tell my body, hey, me as an immune system, stop reacting, stop it. I can't do that. It's just gonna happen the way it wants to happen. And it can happen so fast and out of nowhere. And to not have, don't have any control over that is the really scary part because I just I can't do anything about it except use epinephrine. And using epinephrine is very it can be really scary. The third thing to add on to that is that because I feel as though my body is like I'm not in control of my body, it feels like an out-of-body experience. I feel like I am just put into this tunnel vision, like fight or flight mode, and I have to think really fast. I have to lock in. And thankfully, because I've had an anaphylaxis about, I believe, 10 times in my life now. I can do that. I can lock in when I'm in a fight or flight situation. It's after the fact that I process what happened and I start like, I feel like all like the trauma and the anxiety and the PTSD that I experience. But it's it's something that I just feel like I dissociate when it happens. I don't feel like it's real. Like there's no way my body is acting this way, like no way this is actually happening. And that's the scary part of it, is that it is like an out-of-body experience. I don't know how to like, I feel like unless you have experienced anaphylaxis, it's so hard to explain what I mean by this. So hopefully, if you have had it, if you're listening to this and you've had an anaphylaxis or know someone that has experienced it, hopefully you understand what I'm trying to say. It's so confusing because unless you live with it, you're not gonna really understand what it means. Um, and that's okay. That's just the way it is sometimes. And the fourth thing that I kind of mentioned as my first reason is that it really just catches you off guard. Like I could be doing something, and then out of nowhere, bam, anaphylaxis. And that's what happened to me two months ago, where I was doing a food challenge for hazelnut, and I actually passed the challenge, or so I thought I did. And then six hours later, I'm laying in bed watching a show about some, like, I think it was like president. Um, I forget what the president was. It was some like Netflix show about like a former president, and it was really good. And then all of a sudden, my throat just starts closing up. And I'm like, like, oh my gosh, like are you like like and and it just really throws me off and it just changes the entire mood. It it puts me in a from a very calm state where I'm like relaxing, laying in bed, to literally like figuring out, okay, like I don't want to die. I have to figure out how what to do to save my own life. Like that is such a like a drastic zero to a hundred like change, just like like that. Like that's how it can happen. So it really just catches me off guard, it throws me off. And then the rest of the night, I just feel like that. And then the next day and the days after that, where I'm trying to process what I just went through. I also feel like I'm just super thrown off and everything is just out of whack. And my body also, whenever I go through anaphylaxis and I do epinephrine, my body is not the same for like months. I experienced lots of GI problems, lots of eczema flares. So I just feel super, as I said, out of whack. I think is the best way to describe it. And then another question I get commonly asked is how do I spot the difference between anxiety or an allergic reaction? And I really want to emphasize that this is not medical advice. I am like, please, like, please talk to your doctor about these sorts of things. This is just my personal experience. Okay, I don't want to get sued saying, I want to just say that to really make sure I don't get in trouble. Um I've had allergies for 23 years of my life. And so for me personally, I just know my body well. I am pretty much able to distinguish at this point whether it's anxiety or an or an allergic reaction, um, just by the sensations that I feel. Like, and and one way I kind of am able to tell is, you know, if my symptoms are like they get worse. Where it's for example, if I have like hives on my arm and the hives just get really bad, I'm like, okay, like that's not anxiety. Or if my throat is getting really tight and it's getting more and more tight and I'm having more difficulty breathing, I just know. And I also experience when I go into anaphylaxis specifically, I get this throbbing pain in my throat while it's starting to swell up. So if I'm experiencing anxiety and my throat feels kind of tight, I'm not having that throbbing pain, like, okay, that is not anaphylaxis, that or allergic reaction, that is just simply anxiety. I will do things to help calm myself down, like listening to music, meditating, take like like going for a walk. But again, as I said, because I know my body well, I'm able to recognize different patterns and know, oh, this is an allergic reaction or this is not. Um, so I think it's really important for you to maybe like what I've learned is to keep track of your symptoms and write them down. So you can kind of refer to like, oh, I like I had these symptoms before, and this was from an actual reaction, or oh, I experienced like my chest felt kind of tight, but it went away after whatever amount of minutes. And so, but let's say I'm in a situation where I genuinely cannot tell. And that has happened to me before. But actually, when I was younger, I had times where I would just not be able to tell and I would just go straight to taking like two Benadryls, which obviously don't do that. But if I'm not able to tell, what I will do is, and if this reaction, again, there's a time and place for this but the reaction is not like severe, it's like, oh, like my throat feels kind of itchy and my tongue feels kind of like my lips feel kind of tingly, what I'll do is I will distract myself. I will listen to music, and I'll close my eyes, or I'll watch a YouTube video of like a comfort YouTuber that I like to watch. I will call a friend, call my parents, and if within five minutes the symptoms are like not going away and they're still persisting, I'm like, okay, this might be an actual reaction, and I have to do what I need to do like with my allergy action plan. But the symptoms start to subside, I'm like, uh, it was just anxiety. But again, everyone has a very different experience. This is just what works for me. And again, because I I've had allergies for such a long for like my entire life, I just can tell when something is or is not a reaction. And I think that I recommend keeping a journal or a log of your symptoms. So then you can also start to recognize, oh, I know there's like a pattern where I have this specific food and this happens, or this reaction. Like you can start to tell. And that's what really helped me. So let's zoom out a bit and talk about how food allergies affect, you know, friendships, relationships, things of that sort, because I get asked questions about this all the time. Okay, you know what? Why not just do a whole section on this podcast addressing those questions? I think they're really valid questions to ask. The first one that I get asked often is how does having food allergies affect your friendships and relationships? So I'm gonna go back in time a little bit to when I was younger because I feel like once I got to college, things just improved tremendously. But before college, it was rough. I felt like a burden, an inconvenience growing up. I was bullied a lot in high school and middle school and elementary school. Uh, people threatened to sneak allergens into my food in class, which is so messed up. Um, I was never really always, I was not always invited to things because of my allergies. I've had people say to my face I'm a burden or inconvenience, or my allergies are just straight up annoying. And I personally felt as though I am an inconvenience or burden because people treated me as if I was. It wasn't until I went to college that I met people who were open-minded and were kind and were willing to learn about my allergies and want to be a good friend. And that to me not only changed the way I viewed friendships, but also the way I viewed myself. I'm like, wow, you know, I'm not a burden. It's just I was not around the right crowd of people. Because I went to a very small high school and middle elementary school. And because of that, there was not like a great selection of people to be to be friends with, quite frankly. I'm not afraid to admit that. And so now that I'm an adult with allergies, and when I was advocating college, something that I kind of learned to do is use my food allergies as a filter to see if people are worthy of my time. And there's many pros to this, but there are also if Some cons. I think the biggest con is that people are going, you're gonna have to cut people out of your life, or you're gonna have to at least distance yourself from certain people. And that can be really hard, but it's better for you in the long run and better for that person too, because if you're not the right fit, friendship-wise, what's the point? And so I don't have a very strict criteria of what I look for in friends when it comes to allergies. The main thing to me is that you don't have to be an expert, have like a PhD level of knowledge on allergies. But if you are someone that is open-minded and kind and empathetic and is willing to at least learn or ask questions, to me, that's a green flag in my book. And so when I'm making friends and meeting people, and people are making fun of my allergies or they're saying really rude remarks about, I'm like, you know what? Maybe not a good friend or someone I want to be really close with. But if someone said to me, hey Mia, I'm not super knowledgeable about food allergies, but I want to learn more and be a good friend, that to me is like music to my ears. Like that to me means everything. And so I think, you know, being able to use your allergies as a way to filter out people and know who is or who isn't good for you is a really like one of the things I feel like really happy with having allergies because if someone in my life cannot like support my allergies, like and they don't have to again, they don't have to like bend over backwards for me with it. As long as they are empathetic and kind about it, if they can't even do that, they're probably not someone you want to be friends with anyway, because having allergies is just out of my control. So if someone is not gonna be supportive or kind about something that I cannot control, yikes. And another question I get commonly asked is about dating. All the time. People ask me about how I date with allergies, how what that's like, um, is it difficult, is it easy? And I'm gonna be honest, it is not easy. I've had people in my life tell me to my face that me having allergies is a burden to them. And what's ironic about that is that if having allergies is a burden to them, how do you think it feels to be me, be the one that has to live with these allergies every single day? Exactly. But again, as I said, when it comes to friendships, this applies to eating too, is to use your allergies as a filter to show you who is worthy of your time or not. And people then you usually will ask me, okay, awesome, but when is it when is it an appropriate time to disclose your allergies to someone that you're going on a date with or you're dating? And this is just me personally. Everyone has a different approach with this, but for me, I think there's no right or wrong time, but I personally like to do it as soon as possible because I don't want to waste my time. And I don't want to waste their time either, because their time is precious just as mine is. And if someone feels as though they cannot be the right partner for me, at least I want to know now versus five months down the line. But by then they will know I have allergies. But anyway, at this point in my life, because of my allergy advocacy and online presence that I've built, which I don't think is super duper huge, but it's enough. Or if you Google my name, it comes up. If I'm like with guys I've dated in the past or I'm talking to, and they Google me and they're still talking to me after they've researched me, I feel as though they still want to date me because if they saw this allergy page, they and they did not like it or or rock with it and know that allergies, they probably would want to like end things and ghost me. So if they're still talking to me after finding out about my allergy advocacy page, chances are they don't find my allergies to be a deal breaker. So that's kind of been also really helpful. But I think, you know, if you are dating and you want to disclose your allergies in the beginning, do it. If you don't, that's fine too. I always kind of advocate to do it as soon as possible because again, like you don't want to waste your time or their time because life is short. And I think that people always think that dating with allergies, like, yes, it is challenging to find the right person, but once you find that right person, it honestly is great. And there are so many different dates you can go on or things you can do that don't revol revolve around food. Because I think, again, we live in a society where food is this big thing, and like, yes, we love food, food is great, but there's more to life than just food. And there's so many different date options you can go on, like going to an aquarium, museum, kayaking, exploring new places that you've never been to before, painting pottery, going to board game cafes, like the list goes on. So you can date with allergies. It is very possible. And I think too, again, if someone does not want to date you because you have food allergies, be so thankful because you don't want someone like that in your life anyway. And that's what I always tell myself when I am because I'm not really dating right now, but if I ever get back into that stage in my life, you know, that's what I tell myself is that the right person will not find you to be a burden. And if someone does find you to be a burden, goodbye. You don't want to be with someone like that anyway, because again, having allergies is so out of your control. And you don't want to be with someone that is going to give you a hard time or something that you cannot control. And that's on period. Another question I get commonly asked is you know, if if I don't have food allergies myself, I want to be an allergy ally, what can I do to achieve that? I think that allyship is so important when it comes to having food allergies, just like any other important cause, such as the LGBTQ community, for example, I think that having straight allies is so important to again like justify their cause, which again is 100% justified. Um, that's just an example. Or other important political movements, it's so important to have allyship for that. And I think the same thing goes with allergies. And I think by having people that are not that are not allergic support our cause and justify our cause, it really makes us look more legitimate and and will help us feel more safe and included in a world that is not built for us. So here are some things that you can do to be an allergy ally, in my personal opinion. The first thing I recommend is to just believe people. Listen to their experiences with an open mind and know with your heart that food allergies are real. They're not a choice, you're not picky, you're not overreacting. They are real, they are a real serious health condition, and they deserve to be taken seriously. So I think the first thing is just to acknowledge that these are like allergies are real and they're legitimate, um, and people have different experiences. And that kind of leads back to my second point, which is to always ask instead of assume, because everyone has different experiences. What I might experience, somebody else might not experience. And that's totally okay and valid. So I think it's always important to instead of assuming things, like for example, if you watch my page and think, oh, me a travel, so that means that somebody else will travel with allergies. That's not, not, not everyone wants to travel with allergies, and that is totally okay. And so instead of assuming that because I can travel, somebody else can ask. And if anything, asking shows that you care. And that I think is so important. The third tip I really recommend is to normalize accommodating people that have allergies. What I mean by this is let's say you are hosting a party and you don't have allergies yourself, but maybe you have some guests that do, maybe, or you maybe you don't know if they have allergies, like you have no idea if your guests have allergies. What you can do is send a little message to the group chat or to like the party invitation and say, anyone has any allergies, please let me know. And so just doing that that small little question means the whole world to people like us that have food allergies. Another example is if you're a waitress or waiter, for example, and you're, you know, ordering and taking people's orders, you should always ask people that are sitting at the table saying, Hey, like about to take your order. Does anyone at this table have any allergies? By just asking that question again, it implies that you are aware that allergies exist and you want to make sure that that person that's gonna order feels safe and included. And that, again, is so important. Like that I think the whole point of normalizing these kinds of accommodations or asking this question makes people like me feel seen and um included. And so when you ask these kinds of questions, it kind of normalizes allergies a bit more. And you don't feel like we're like an outcast or an outlier. Like it's just part of it's just part of the protocol that people are gonna ask. And so I've had friends who have thrown parties who will send like a message saying, hey, if anyone has any allergies, please message me so we can make sure there's no allergens present at this party. People will have like when they serve food, they'll have serving spoons for every single item. So there's no risk of cross contact. And I remember I went to this one little hangout party, and this girl had uh she was had that she had like a sign that said, please do not mix the spoons in different, like serve like the spoons in different bowls because of cross contact, because of allergies. And people did that. People listened to it. And so do those little things may not matter to you, but to people with allergies, it means everything. So I want to transition more to just how how I live a fulfilling life with allergies, as well as talking about allergy testing and just your overall identity as someone that has allergies. A question I get commonly asked is about how I travel with allergies specifically. You know, what do you say to someone who wants to travel but feels like they can't because of their allergies? And it's a really good question. And I think, again, everyone's different. This is just my personal experience. So please take it with a grain of salt and always talk to your doctor. But I believe that traveling is a thousand percent possible. But it's a matter if it's something you want to do and you're comfortable with. I view traveling like a calculated risk. You know, there's a lot of planning that goes involved, and it's always a risk going somewhere new because life happens, reactions can occur. That's just something that happens in our experiences. But I think if you really plan accordingly, you'll be good to go. And here's something that I do personally to help me feel empowered and safe when I travel. The first thing is I pick countries or cities or just places that have good, reliable health care. You will never, ever, ever catch me traveling somewhere where there is no good quality health care because God forbid I'm in a situation where my life is or I need medical attention. I want to be somewhere where I can get access to good, again, reliable medical care, and I will be okay. Another thing that I do is I always get an allergy chef card in the specific language of the place I'm traveling to. And I use the brand, not sponsored by the way, but Equal Eats. They are excellent, they're amazing. I love Equal Eats. They have allergy chef cards in basically every single language, and basically it right, it has it's like a laminated card. You can also get like a virtual card where you can like print a card out and you can put in your specific allergies, and it you can do it any language you want, and it'll also have a cross-contact protocol as well, saying, like, you know, use clean gloves, equipment, etc., etc., in that language. And that has been so helpful. I was just in Prague and Holland over the summer, so I made sure to get an allergy chef card in uh Czech and in Dutch, and it made eating out so easy and seamless. Additionally, I always like to pack a carry-on bag full of snacks. So, for example, when I went to Europe like two years ago to visit a f with a friend, I packed a carry-on with Abe's muffins, uh, meat sticks, the Larissa's kitchen meat sticks, made good granola bars or granola balls, whatever, uh, microwaveable popcorn, fruit snacks, go-go squeezes, and anything else that was gonna be like essential for me for food to eat. And the reason why I packed this carry-on with full of snacks is because if I were out like being a tourist and there was no safe food, I would just be left hungry for like six to eight hours, which is way too long. So instead, I would just take some of those snacks and pack them with me when I go out and I'm being a tourist. And then I don't have to worry about, oh, like where can I find food? Like, if I can't find anything that's safe, at least I have those safe snacks to fall back on, which I think is really great to have a backup plan. I also, this is, I think, a no-brainer, but I always, always, always pack extra epinephrine on me. I usually bring about two to three packs epinephrine because you never know, you never know, as well as antihistamines, um, my inhaler. And I also always get travel health insurance because again, if I'm in a situation where I need medical attention, obviously, like they don't take US health insurance if I'm like somewhere like in Amsterdam, for example. So having that health insurance, international health insurance, or to have that travel health insurance is so helpful. Obviously, I hope to not use it, but I have in case there's an accident or something goes wrong and I need to get medical attention. Um, I also always recommend talk to your allergist to have an allergy action plan when it comes to traveling. That's what I usually do. If I'm like going somewhere that I've never been to and I'm a bit nervous, I'll just talk to my allergist and figure out what are some things I should do. And the next thing that I do is because I'm a big foodie, I love eating out, obviously I have to do it safely and carefully, is researching restaurants ahead of time and then contacting them to figure out if they can accommodate me. So for me, I know that the safe cuisines I can eat are Italian food, like American food, like burgers or fries, or even like steak. Um, I can do like Cuban food, like Mexican food, um, things of that sort. Usually I'll kind of research like what restaurants in this area offer these different cuisines, and then I'll email them and communicate with them to see if they can accommodate me and what options are safe on the menu. And then I'll reserve a table. And usually I'll plan out like a whole itinerary for that trip, and I'll make sure to like have the restaurants that I want to go to like all in there with the reservation and the person I spoke to. So if in case I guess a restaurant they're like unsure if I they can accommodate me, I'll just like, oh hey, I emailed and talked to this person, like, and they'll say, okay, you're good to go. Um, I also think too, having a like a list of backup restaurants in case the ones that you want to go to don't work out, like that has happened where I would go to a restaurant and they're like, actually, we can't, we don't want to serve you. It's not, it's not worth the risk of having a backup option, is great because I remember when I was in Belgium two years ago with my family, at a restaurant that we were gonna we're gonna go to, and then they were not safe. They thought they said they would accommodate me and then they were like, uh, actually, yeah, no, we can't serve you. We went and we didn't have a backup restaurant in mind, which was my wrongdoing because I did not think um or plan accordingly, which is why you learn from your mistakes. My my family, they're so patient with me, and I'm so grateful for them. We went to 13 different restaurants after to find a safe place. And it wasn't until the 13th one that they said, okay, yeah, we can serve you. You went to 13 restaurants. That that is so insane. That's what you have to do sometimes. Um, but let's say you're like, you know, you're like, you know what, I don't want to eat out, I don't want to do that. Then you know what you can do is stay in an Airbnb and cook your own food. That is the probably the safest thing you can do because at least you know for a fact that what you're cooking is your own. You've made it with the things that you can eat. And I've done that where I would travel with a friend, we stayed in an Airbnb, I cook my own food, and it was so easy, it was so civilized. I would just eat before we go, and then we go out, or my friend would cook her food and she'd put it in a thermos, take it with her. And that to me is also genius. So I think if you want to travel, but you're nervous too, staying in an Airbnb, cooking your own food is always, I think, a great way to do it. The final thing that I recommend is if you're gonna travel with allergies, travel with someone that you trust and someone that understands what allergies are and how they work, and if you're in an emergency, what they can do to help you. Um, I think that's like really important. So whenever I travel, I've got gone traveling with my family, which obviously is a no-brainer. I travel with some friends on with my brother, and he again, my brother has allergies too, so he understands it. But traveling with someone, I feel like makes it feel less scary because you're not alone. And I think that traveling alone with allergies, like, I don't know if I can really ever do that because of just my comfort level, and that's totally okay. So the next question I get asked often is what is my experience with food allergy uh testing and outgrowing food allergies? And I've been really sharing a lot about this recently because I actually outgrew three allergies last year uh cooked dairy, macadamia nuts, and almond. Yay! Amazing. But you know, part of doing outgrowing allergies is actually having to eat the food and seeing what happens, aka a food challenge. And for those that don't know what a food challenge is, you basically will do skin and blood testing on your specific allergens. Let's say the results come back and it says that, you know, hazelnuts, which I'll use in an example later on too, the the numbers are really low for blood and for your skin. The allergist will then say, okay, let's do a challenge where you actually will eat the allergen in a clinic for a few hours and see how you react to it. And you start off with a really small, like little dose, and then you'll work your way up to eating like a few more and more and more. And if you don't react to it, you passed. And so I have done a ton, uh, like so many food challenges. And I have not, I probably have only passed like five or six of them, um, which I think is pretty pretty. Like, I'm not gonna complain, like, I'm not against that. That's really awesome. But a lot of them I've I've not passed. And so, because I've done so many food challenges, I've had to kind of learn to figure out like what is the right headspace I should have going into a food challenge. Should I be optimistic? Should I just be like thinking the thinking the worst case scenario? Should I be neutral? And I've learned, you know what? I'm going to stay neutral because I don't want to have any expectations, either positive or negative. I don't want to have any. I want to just go into it feeling neutral. And whatever happens will happen the way it's supposed to. That being said, I'm only human. And when I've had challenges where I've not passed, I'm not gonna lie, I have felt very defeated and experienced grief of what it would have been like if I did pass the challenge. Um, a great example of this is when I had my hazelnut challenge about two-ish, three-ish months ago, where I actually passed in the clinic. Like I, you know, no problems at all. But then again, six hours later, and my throat closes up. And I realized that was a delayed reaction. And the amount of grief and sadness I felt after that was profound because it was like a sense of false hope. It was like, oh, haha, you thought wrong. And experiencing that was very defeating and really, really crushed me. Um and so if I have experienced sadness, I let myself feel that grief. That's what I've learned is that like a good friend of mine has told me that you cannot avoid grief. You can't go around it, under it, above it, you gotta go through the grief. So if I don't pass a challenge and I feel grief, I let myself feel that grief because you have to feel the grief to get over it or to at least move forward from it. And so having to navigate these challenges, these food challenges, is a very emotionally taxing experience. Um, and you know, but when I do outgrow an allergy, I feel like I'm on top of the world. I feel like I'm on cloud nine, and I feel like I feel a strong sense of hope. And that's what gets me through is you know what? Maybe I didn't pass this challenge, but hey, I passed the other two or the other three, so that's a win. And I don't really view like not passing a challenge as a loss. I view it as, you know what, I'm proud of myself for trying. And you know what, maybe next time I might pass it, or maybe I'll be able to tolerate more of it. So, for example, I had a food challenge for uncooked cheese, and I could only tolerate up to half a cheese stick without having a reaction. But you know what? I gotta eat half a cheese stick. Like two years ago, I could not even have a cheese stick at all. So having half of one is huge, and that is progress, and that is a win to me. So I think it's really important to reframe your thoughts too, and always have your default way of thinking, being negative instead of trying to find the positive things that maybe aren't great, maybe at face value. But really, if you really think about it, honestly, you can see things as a win if you really look at it the right way. Um, another question that I received about my mindset is just what are some defining moments in your mindset surrounding your allergies? And there's been a few specific moments in my life that have really shaped the way I think about my allergies. So the first defining moment for me about how allergies have kind of shaped shaped my mindset was when I saw my allergist many years ago, and he told me that there's a very strong chance I won't be able to outgrow any of my allergies. And hearing that initially was very devastating and really crushed me. Because I've always been labeled as a medically complex patient. I've had allergists give up on me because they're like, Yeah, I don't know what to do with you. And this allergist just was he's he was honest. He's like, Me, like, I don't think that you're gonna be able to outgrow you. I think you're gonna have this for life. And so, and initially I was very, very defeated and very crushed hearing that news. But then I eventually was like, you know what? This is my life. This is out of my control. And I have to just accept it and come to terms with it. And if anything, embrace it. Because what else can I do? Sit down and just cry all the time? No, I'm not doing that. I'm not doing that. And so I decided to post a TikTok. And I was feeling kind of in that defeated stage where I, and this was six years ago, where I listed my top allergens while I was dancing to a song from Teen Beach movie. Yeah, I know. And that video went really viral overnight. And I received so many comments from people saying to me, Oh my gosh, I have these same allergies. I feel so seen. I don't feel alone. And that really also helped me realize I'm not alone in this. And I want to meet people that are similar, that are in my shoes and find community because again, I can't get rid of these allergies, but what I can do is work with it and embrace it and view it as something that is going to uplift me and and find ways to make it improve my life. And because of that one TikTok that I posted, six years later now, I've been able to build a whole career around my allergies, have a podcast, have an online presence, meet so many amazing advocates, talk to such amazing people. Um, and that really showed me, you know what, you can make, you can make lemonade out of lemons. You really, if you can find a positive thing and something that's so negative, it's gonna really like rock your world and really change the way you see the world and see your health condition. And for me, that's really what really helped me was my social media work. I also think something that really has helped me too is recognizing that I have been gifted this one chance at life, and I don't want to waste it. And I don't want fear to run my life and control me. And so having to learn how to overcome that fear, and I still have fear because again, I'm human, but learning how to again embrace these allergies and own it has made me feel more empowered. And it comes with its challenges, of course, but it's something that is so important, is just changing your mindset and and finding the good and things that are maybe not always so good. Because again, when you look at allergies objectively, it's like, oh, like this is terrible. It's and yeah, like it is it having allergies sucks. It's not fun, like it's very difficult, but there are still so many positive things that have come from allergies or from my food allergies specifically. Um, that's what's gonna lead me to my kind of my final point, which is things about my allergies that I think are really awesome. And I think the first thing I kind of mentioned a bit ago is just the community, the people that are in the allergy space, the amazing doctors and advocates, patient advocates, people that are in big pharma trying to make treatments to make our lives better, allergy nonprofits, people that are in politics. Like there's so many amazing advocates in this space. And I feel so honored and grateful to be part of that community and and work with them and get to know them and learn about their experience and how we can all work together to make the world a more inclusive place for people like us, people that have other dietary restrictions or health conditions. So having food allergies has also really taught me to be an empathetic person, um, not only for people that have allergies, but people that have other dietary restrictions, because I'm just so aware of the struggles that we because we all kind of experience very similar things, just wanting to feel again seen and safe. I think those are like the two things that we want to experience as people with allergies and other dietary restrictions. And I think that having food allergies is a very humbling thing. You know, I've I've been humbled for sure from experiences I've gone through with my allergies, like different reactions and things like that. But it's taught me to be a really empathetic, empathetic person. I'm really grateful for that. Um, I also think too taught me to be very self-aware and knowing my limits, such as setting boundaries and being confident in those boundaries. I think that as people, you want to please others. And I think that, you know, people pleasing is obviously important to make other people happy, but also you gotta do things that make you feel safe and empowered. And I think learning those skills and setting boundaries and being able to advocate for yourself is such a valuable skill to learn. And I'm grateful that I've been able to learn this from such a young age. And now I'm 23 and I'm able to like speak out and advocate for myself so I can feel safe and have boundaries and limits to things that I don't feel comfortable doing. Another thing I'm really grateful for, or positive part about having allergies, is this platform that I've built. You know, I feel like my goal, like obviously posting online about my allergies every day. I'm so grateful for this job and for people that take the time out of their day to watch my content and engage with it and support it and write me such kind, supportive messages. But obviously, I'm posting about something that's very deep and personal and private, which is my health. But I am willing to make that sacrifice if it means people will feel more um included and feel seen and help others feel more empowered to advocate for themselves. As again, advocating for yourself is what will make us feel more safe and seen. And if I have to post this kind of content so others can feel safe and empowered to advocate for themselves, that to me is worth it. And, you know, I feel like having this platform has kind of helped me become also more confident in myself and as able, I'm able to kind of like document my experience. I can like look back on like, wow, like I really have been able to do, I've been able to live a really fulfilling life with my allergies. I'm able to travel, I'm able to go out with friends, do really awesome, fun things. And I feel like posting my content really proves that to people because people often think you can't, people often think that you have to just like if allergies, you have to just like sit at home and like you can't do anything. But no, my page, I want to show you you can live a fulfilling, enriching life with allergies. And yeah, I still show parts that are really difficult because I want to keep it as authentic as possible. But I think overall I'm really proud of the page or the presence I have built online and how it's been able to impact and help so many people and able to provide, you know, accessible and free information and just spread awareness and educate people that maybe don't even know about allergies. Like I'm really grateful for that. And the final thing that I feel that allergies have given me is resilience. I think going into anaphylaxis and having allergies your whole life really just changes you as a person and it makes you a lot stronger. And so I'm able, when I go through difficult times in my life, because that's what life, life happens. I'm able to stand up, dust myself off, and move forward while giving myself the space to grieve and process whatever I whatever I need to process and grieve at that current moment. Um having allergies is not for the weak. You have to be a really strong person mentally to have to live with this. Whether you want to be strong or not, you're kind of forced to be strong, in my opinion. And so I feel really grateful that I have that skill where I can be strong and resilient and navigate this challenge with such grace. So if you have allergies and you're listening to this, I want to just say that you're not weak and that you're not dramatic and that you deserve to feel joy and live a fulfilling life. And I hope that you know, listening to this episode, you maybe have learned a few things where it's giving you some hope that it is possible to have valuable friendships and relationships and be able to travel and just navigate life overall with allergies. Because if I can do it, so can you. And for those that are listening to for those that are listening to this episode that don't have allergies themselves, hopefully you learn something new from this too that you can gain. You can share with other people that don't have allergies, so they can also become allergy allies. We need all the allergy allies we can get so we can again feel safe and seen in a world that's not built for people like us. But I thank you all for again being so supportive about this podcast. It's been such an awesome experience, and I can't wait for you guys to see and hear new episodes that are coming out. I have some really awesome guests that are lined up. Um, if you have any guests that you want me to, you know, have on the podcast, please feel free to DM me so I know. Um, but thank you all for taking time out of your busy lives to listen to this podcast. I hope you all have a great night, day, afternoon, wherever you're from. And I'll see you next time. Bye.