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Smudge Sticks and Mild Hope

Kristin McArthur Season 1 Episode 2

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0:00 | 25:56

Kristin does a New Year's vision board.

Kelly get's up close and personal with some black glitter paper.

It all works out in the end. The New Years Episode. 

Kristin:

So did we hit everything?

Kelly:

I hit everything on my list. Do you have anything on your list?

Kristin:

No, because you had three things.

Kelly:

We were each we're supposed to have three things.

Kristin:

Oh, I didn't I didn't get that part of the message. I just thought that you came up with three things that we were gonna talk about. The things that you came up with. I didn't get that part. Year of the fire horse.

Kelly:

Year of fire horse. Not just a horse, a fire horse.

Kristin:

So allegedly is the year of the fire horse, 2026.

Kelly:

2026.

Kristin:

What did you want to say about the year of the fire horse?

Kelly:

I don't have deep thoughts right now. But I feel like it's promising.

Kristin:

Okay.

Kelly:

I like horses.

Kristin:

You do like horses. Very much. I've always liked horses.

Kelly:

Yeah, very much.

Kristin:

Like, is your Chinese astrology symbol a horse?

Kelly:

No, I'm a goat. Which also I didn't like my whole life until I realized it was greatest of all time. And so now I have goat t-shirts, goat everything.

Kristin:

It's fine. I think I'm year of the pig.

Kelly:

What does pig mean?

Kristin:

I like to be comfy.

Kelly:

Oh, really? [Uh-huh.] That's what a pig is?

Kristin:

I don't know. I I might have just made that up, but I feel like I read that somewhere at like a Chinese restaurant in Michigan. [Oh, like on the] little table napkin things or like that you put [the placemats]. Yeah. So, like, but like what what are you most looking forward to in your year of the fire horse?

Kelly:

I think that it means new beginnings. It means momentum. It means fire.

Kristin:

This is good. Yeah. [And horses.]

Kelly:

Here, I'll read it. I'll read it. I'll read it. Let me ask ChatGPT what it means. I'll ask him from my I have a health and crystals project in ChatGPT.

Kristin:

Do you like organize your projects or do you just ask the chat a question?

Kelly:

No, I organize it. Yeah. What does the year of the fire horse have in store? Fire years don't wait for readiness. They move because movement itself is the point. Anything vague, half alive, or being politely tolerated tends to combust. Not dramatically, just cleanly. It's ri it writes back to me like I write to it. It's it's become a little a little meta. It comes from the Chinese zodiac when the horse sign aligns with the fire element. That pairing only happens every 60 years. Horse already means speed, independence, refusal to be contained, fire adds volatility and ignition. Together, they don't pause to ask permission. So psychologically, the archetype is about freedom without apology, charisma, relentlessness, a tendency to burn bridges simply because stopping feels worse. I love this year. I love this year. So no chaos for chaos sake, more like movement that doesn't negotiate.

Kristin:

Okay, but here's a good question, though. Okay, so everything that you just read. How much do you feel? And this is this is off topic of the fire horse, but how much do you feel is did chat GPT just give you back what you have put into chat GPT?

Kelly:

It sounds exactly like my book. Like, yes, I 100%.

Kristin:

So, okay, but this like I was having a conversation with our personal trainer at the gym.

Kelly:

His name's not Pain Daddy.

Kristin:

I mean, it depends on who you ask. If you ask my chat GPT, his name is Pain Daddy. If you ask your chat GPT, his name is the man. The man who counts. And I don't think he has a say in either. I think you are.

Kelly:

He told me in veto power.

Kristin:

Um, maybe for yours, but for mine, I don't think it is. But no, so I was having this conversation with our personal trainer, and he was he was telling me how chat like how how open ai is in like trouble because some like like people are are killing themselves after talking to it. Okay. That was my that was my exact reaction. I was like, what? I was like, that is not true. I was like, this is not true. Um, but even if it is, and like maybe it is, but I was like, I've never heard of this before. And so like I understand that like my purview of like what's going on in the world doesn't make things true or untrue. Like I don't know everything that's happening, but like I feel like that's a stretch of the imagination. But he was saying that it's uh it had something to do with like someone who was, I'm I'm assuming diagnosed as a schizophrenic, was getting certain things like like was putting certain things into chat GPT and getting things back, like like it not like but I uh and the whole point of the story is not not what happened or or didn't happen or allegedly happened, I don't know. But I told him, I I told our personal trainer, aka pain daddy, that he I was like, I was like, well, okay, assuming this is true, if the person who is inputting the information into the system is a paranoid schizophrenic, I would think that Chat GPT is going to spit out paranoid schizophrenic things back at it. Like it it's going to it's only it only has the information you give it, like to talk, like conversationally.

Kelly:

What I feel like is it's less, it's not, oh, Krissie wants X. It doesn't understand want. It's Krissie's intent when she prompted me was this logical thing that I pulled out. So I'm gonna go to the internet and grab what the first thing I see and bring it back.

Kristin:

Right, which is like I understand that I'm saying that the way that the logic of of the actual thing works is off of a prompt that you give it.

Kelly:

Yes, you have to prompt it.

Kristin:

It's not sitting there if I'm not using my chat. It doesn't wonder where I am thinking.

Kelly:

No, it doesn't wonder where I am,

Kristin:

Right. Exactly as much [as I'd want it to], right. It it's not it's not compiling things that it thinks I will like.

Kelly:

No, it's not like ooh, Chrissy, tomorrow is probably gonna on Tuesday. She asked me about bunny rabbits.

Kristin:

Right. That's what I'm saying is you have to prompt it with what you want it to to look for. I was trying to explain that to him, and he was like, no, yeah, I totally can. And I was like, no, bro, it doesn't. I was like, pain daddy, pain daddy, pain daddy. It doesn't have reason. It can't reason out what you're saying. Like if if you're putting in things, it's going, it's it's it's all like it's only answering to the knowledge that you're asking for.

Kelly:

It's a yes and engine. [Right.] It's a it's machine learning, it's very, very convincing as something that's talking to you. But it is a yes and engine, I feel like, and I don't know because I didn't build it, but having built stuff like it, I would and had using it daily, I think it's amazing, is that the what what I get from it, like if I was to reverse engineering it, it says yes, and also here's more information. Yes, and also here's more information, and you can course correct it, but you course correct it in a way where it's still like, oh yes, that seems more true than what I told you, and here's more information.

Kristin:

[It's just] Right, it's it's just pulling sources and giving you information from those sources.

Kelly:

Okay, so I just went to the googs and I asked it, I just said fire horse year. The year of the fire horses, the Chinese zodiac in 2026, beginning on February 17th, bringing intense energy, passion, and transformation, a rare combination occurring only every 60 years, symbolizing freedom, action, and bold change following the reflective snake year. This dynamic year encourages breaking old patterns, pursuing independence, and highlights themes of courage and self-expression with potential for significant societal shifts. So it took the the very boring Google and it made it sound like me.

Kristin:

Right, which is which is what prompts the whole conversation that we just had. Um, and we can go back to Year of the Fire Horse. I I think that I mean, I I think framing I

Kelly:

I think Pain Daddy is a little too deep into the internet, too.

Kristin:

I just love that he vetoed being called Pain Daddy and public forum and like it just stuck.

Kelly:

I think I think he understands we do what we want.

Kristin:

He should by now. Um, but uh getting back to year of the fire horse.

Kelly:

Fire horse. [I] oh you you said that because it says not chaos for chaos sake, didn't you?

Kristin:

There was a lot of things in there that led me to say that though. Like that was one of them, but there was a lot of like circular thoughts that like made me like things that you read that were [it sounds just like me.] Yeah, [yeah.] Yeah, which which led me to the point of like what what you're putting into it's learning [my patterns] cadence and your your way of of communication. [100%] and it's spitting that back out.

Kelly:

And you know what I think every time it it talks about. [But it doesn't, it doesn't know it's doing that, it's just doing that,] it's just doing that because it I do that, right? And I think, gosh, this thing's cool. Because it's me. This thing's a really smart

Kristin:

Mine is not that cool. Like um, but I I do think it's important to frame like the whole to to go into the year ahead and framing it in in I I feel like sometimes that's what like astrology or these more like kind of you know woo-woo things help us with is like to frame our existence in our our time positively. Um and I don't know, I I think that's important. Like having having going into the year feeling like, okay, this is this is a year for forward momentum and this is a year for large leaps, you know, not just small stepping stones, but like large leaps, like almost giving yourself the permission to be like, okay, I can take big swings. You know, I think it's like an important thing to like not not get like all woo-woo about stuff because I I don't think I'm a woo-woo person. I think like I like maybe I am, but like not really. I don't know.

Kelly:

You get more woo-woo as you get older.

Kristin:

I don't know. I think I was more woo-woo when I was younger.

Kelly:

Oh, really? I'm totally, I'm going down the going on the woo train hard.

Kristin:

Yeah, which is really funny because I would have never expected you of all people to be like crystal smudgy stick, woo-woo lady. I got crystals everywhere.

Kelly:

I don't know though. Like my my dream crystals, when they're not by my bed, when they're out in the full moon, I have nightmares. I had nightmares my whole life growing up. I had nightmares into my adult years. I think it's my way, my body's like release of anxiety happens at night through nightmares. But when my crystals are there, no nightmares.

Kristin:

Oh, well, I mean, I do agree. I think I think talismans in general are important. And in fact, I feel like I feel unanchored in the last few years. And now now talking about it, I feel like maybe I need to get some more tal... okay. So I know you thought it was completely stupid, and maybe it was, but I had remember that big dream catcher I had above the headboard of my bed?

Kelly:

Yeah.

Kristin:

Since I've taken that down and put it away, well, threw it away, I have felt unanched.

Kelly:

You threw your dream catcher away. Is that even a thing you're supposed to do?

Kristin:

The dogs ate it. So, like it's like

Kelly:

How do they eat it off the wall?

Kristin:

Well, all I'll have to say is this might be the year of the fire horse, but my last two years were the year of the puppy. They find a way to do whatever it is they want to do. Um, but they definitely ate it. So I'm whatever whatever it caught was had had already gone. So but I'm I felt like un anchored since that has not been in like my house or

Kelly:

You need to put your crystals out too. You don't put your you bought them, but you don't put them out.

Kristin:

No, because I live in a dirt pitch.

Kelly:

You wouldn't put them out you can put them in a box and put them outside.

Kristin:

I'm not gonna put them in a box.

Kelly:

They just need a little full moon. It you need to close the box. We can bring them over here.

Kristin:

T hat I could do

Kelly:

Put them outside. This this full moon, man, that was on this this full moon this last Sunday. What is Sunday, Saturday, Sunday? I don't know. Anyway, uh it was the full moon. I cleaned my whole house, I smudged everything. It's the fire horse year. It was like the 3rd of January, which means all the new year like mental moving forward stuff was happening. It was like on point, this full moon. I feel like there's a momentum building, whether it's just 2026 or 2026 plus, is like it just keeps going. But there's a definite theme building that I am going to allow.

Kristin:

You know what I do need to do though? I need to go through my closet and get rid of clothes that I don't wear.

Kelly:

I feel like we just did that for the time.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I need to do it again. Like, there's a part of me that really wishes I could be I'm not, but like I feel like in there is some part of me that like sees like hippie clothes, and I wish I could be that free spirit person that like that buys like lucky brand. And like I'm not that person.

Kelly:

You mean like free people?

Kristin:

Well, yeah, like free people, and and and and I'm I'm not free people, I'm like uptight, closed off people, like those are my people.

Kelly:

Brand coming soon. [Like those are my people.]

Kristin:

But like I I think I'm like, oh, look at this like ripped flowy sweater, and it it's not me at all, at all. And I I should learn that by now, but I haven't because like there's still part of me that sees that stuff, and I'm like, oh, how cute.

Kelly:

I do that too. I mean, like, I have clothes in my class.

Kristin:

I have one great opposite of black. I feel like the two years of puppy have been like, oh, they ripped that. Okay, we'll just throw it in here really quick so they stop ripping it, and then and then it just piles and piles and piles.

Kelly:

Maybe that's what you need to do this next weekend. Get rid of all the stuff in all the closets and then smudge.

Kristin:

Do you know? I've done that so many times.

Kelly:

I don't know why, where it comes from. Where does it all come from?

Kristin:

I don't know either because it's not like I replace it with [no, you don't buy a lot of stuff.] No, I know. It must just be stuff I have. [Yeah, but why does it all just come back? It's like bunnies.] Maybe this year the fire horse, I can outrun all my stuff. Run fast enough and can't find me. All my garbage.

Kelly:

I'm I am a clinical perger.

Kristin:

And you used to give mom shit about throwing our stuff away. But but do you remember she would throw our clothes away? She would throw, she would throw everything. She threw my hamster away.

Kelly:

He came back to life. No, she threw all the stuff away because she thought he was dying. Yeah, that's true. And then he came back to life and she bought all new stuff and then he died.

Kristin:

She was like [a horrible hamster.] He was three Charlie Brown was an amazing hamster. Oh, wait, no.

Kelly:

Wait, no, I was thinking about Thor.

Kristin:

Thor was not my hamster.

Kelly:

No, it was my hamster. Yeah. But it got out of the house.

Kristin:

Charlie Brown's stuff is the one that got thrown away. And then I had that guinea pig. Piggy. Yeah. And the albino guinea pig. No, that was curly. Curly was a name of curly. I forgot about curly. The albino guinea pig. Oh my goodness. But yeah, no. She was she but used to give her shit all the time for throwing all of our stuff away.

Kelly:

I'll throw everything away. I don't I don't like to keep things around that I don't use. So what do you want for the fire horse here?

Kristin:

Well, I mean, it kind of goes into the vision boards that we did. Right? Like it I think reading some of the stuff on the um the chart that we that we had done on ourselves instead. Like there was some things in there about the past, like my past, that like I have been stagnating and I have been hold like in a holding pattern. And like I can see that with myself. And like I feel like in this year and like I feel like it needs to go beyond a year, right? Like it's it's the beginning, a catalyst, I guess is what I'm trying to say. Like like having this year be a catalyst into making bigger moves and not being stagnant and not being um just kind of I mean, complacent is is not quite right of a word, but kind of complacent and like what what life has for me, you know, like like starting to put that together for myself and like feeling like oh okay I can I can kind of steer that ship a little bit instead of just like letting it meander and see where it goes. But I don't know. I mean like I I guess that's you know like with the vision boards like starting to you know take my shot at some things and like see what happens and and where you can grow stuff and like I I feel like that's that's pretty much 95% of the battle of doing anything right is like just doing it. Just doing it. It's not a stop year it's a go year.

Kelly:

It's a go year that's what I wrote that's what I wrote on my vision board.

Kristin:

You did write a big go.

Kelly:

Big go. Yeah you did I wasn't very good at vision boarding.

Kristin:

You had a big sheet of black sparkly paper though that you spent a lot of time with

Kelly:

I did that's really all it is is black sparkling paper with a tiny little ambiguity in the corner.

Kristin:

And then I did tell you that was not good enough and you needed to try harder yes I think the most confusing part of yours would be the rhinoceros with the unicorn horn.

Kelly:

And battle unicorn [and that means] a unicorn that's going into battle I don't have a unicorn sticker.

Kristin:

It's a rhinoceros it's a battle unicorn wearing a rhinoceros suit.

Kelly:

Yeah that's where all the unicorns are now [rhinoceroses?] Yeah they're all inside rhinoceroses.

Kristin:

Okay well then why don't it like I still don't I I guess I don't understand what like on the vision board though are you the battle unicorn [no I would ride it] okay so it's your steed it's your mount okay what is it manifesting though like in the year [charging forward] oh okay okay into battle [into battle okay everything's a battle] it's very Annie Lennox of you [is she into battles?] doesn't she have a song that's I don't know Love is a battlefield [no that's Pat Benatar and that's just about love] I mean potato potato that's close um I found a lot of good shit for my vision board

Kelly:

You did you manifested like a vision board.

Kristin:

I did I did it was really weird because like normally that stuff doesn't come out for me you know.

Kelly:

I think it's interesting that on your vision board the whole thing manifested around a giant take [yeah] giant black glitter letters.

Kristin:

Yeah which is another thing that I don't know if I would have done before [take or glitter letters?] glitter, because I don't always have the cheeriest outlook on things and I think that that will come and get me in the end. Like I like if there was one there was one piece of advice I could give people younger than myself it would be don't don't fall into a either apathetic or pessimistic trap.

Kelly:

That is very self-aware of you.

Kristin:

I know things do matter and it's okay that they matter [my gosh, oh my gosh] I'm some troll that's

Kelly:

No it's not troll no because you always when something really matters and someone says well then go get it you're like it's fine I don't need it it's fine whatever it's fine no it's fine it's fine it's what whatever fine and you don't ever

Kristin:

No I I don't I don't ever go get what I want like I don't I don't ever try to get what I want no I just kind of let things happen.

Kelly:

So frustrating [I know I know well I mean imagine being me.] I don't I can't but like but like in in actuality like that would be I mean that'd be like it's right there it's literally on the table no it's fine whatever I'm just gonna eat this weird carrot stick I don't want that cupcake I'm like but it's right there literally says Kristin on top no it's fine I'm gonna have this carrot stick that fell on the floor be sad about it I'll go get the cupcake for you no it's fine this carrot stick's fine crunch

Kristin:

No but like I that that would be you know I I think if there's a big lesson that I learned through life and like like you know I I think luckily I'm you know still here um so I have time to like change um like that's I think that's one of the big things that I want to work on with myself is like things are important enough to go get and you should take you should take your shots um in life and like it's it it's okay to want things and to and to get them and like you don't have to apologize for that and you don't have to worry about what other people think.

Kelly:

So you'd eat the cupcake?

Kristin:

A hundred percent, I might even eat two.