Making Peace with the Detour

 The Purpose and The Pivot is a podcast for women navigating transitions in career, leadership, faith, and personal growth. It’s for those moments when you’re re-evaluating what’s next and choosing to realign with purpose—intentionally and confidently.

Through honest conversations, meaningful stories, and practical insight, we’ll explore how to embrace change, lead through transition, and move forward with clarity after the pivot.

McLain Career & Life Coaching dba McLain Enterprises, LLC

https://www.mclainenterprisesllc.com

https://calendly.com/mclainenterprises/30min 

Produced & Edited by: Tyrone K. Sullivan (Media Director)
linkedin.com/in/tyroneksullivan 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Welcome to the Purpose and the Pivot, the podcast for women who know it's time for more. With your host, C. Renee McLean, career and life coach and champion for women navigating change with confidence and clarity. Each week we'll have real conversations about career moves, life transitions, mindset shifts, and the power of redefining your purpose at every stage of life. Whether you're pivoting professionally, personally, or both, this is your space for guidance, growth, and grounded support. Let's dive in.

SPEAKER_01 0:45

Welcome to The Purpose and the Pivot. Today's episode is making peace with the Detour. Mm-hmm. Yes, yes, yes. Let's get into this. Mm-hmm. So most of us have a picture in our minds of how life is supposed to go, right? Yeah. You make a plan, you work hard, you stay committed, and naturally you expect progress to unfold in a certain direction. Yeah. Why wouldn't you, right? But unfortunately, life doesn't always move in straight lines. Sometimes there is an unexpected setback. Uh-huh. A job loss. A delay. A closed door. A season you never planned for. Yeah. Yeah. I know about that. And then suddenly, what you thought would be a direct path turns into a detour. Oh yes. That's what we're talking about today. Making peace with the detour. And if I'm gonna be honest, detours can feel deeply frustrating. Oh yes. They interrupt momentum. They also challenge expectations. Yeah. They create uncertainty. Yeah. And sometimes detours can leave you questioning yourself. Yeah. Did I make the wrong decision? Am I falling behind? Did I miss my moment? Yeah. Those questions are natural. But hear me, a detour is not always a sign that something has gone wrong. Sometimes it's simply a different route to the same destination. And sometimes it leads you somewhere even better than what you originally planned. Oh yes, that's what a detour can do. We don't see it at that time, but oh my goodness, when we get a further a bit further down the road, oh yes. Mm-hmm. So hmm. You may think, why do detours feel so hard? Well, detours are difficult because they disrupt our control. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And you know we like to be in control. Let's be honest. Detours force you to release the timeline you expected. Uh-huh. And often that's where the real struggle lives. Yeah, yeah. The timeline. It's in the timeline. Yeah. Not just in the change itself, but in the loss of the picture you had in your mind. The version of how you thought this season would unfold. The role you thought you'd still be in. The outcome you thought would have happened by now. For some women it's like, you know, I thought I'd be married by now. I used to think that. I did. The timing you thought made sense. Yes. Before forty, maybe, right? And when reality doesn't match expectation, disappointment can set in. Uh-huh. Yeah. But hear me with this. Disappointment does not mean defeat. It means you're in a moment of adjustment. Yeah. And adjustment is part of growth. Mm-hmm. You may not want to hear this, but it is true. An adjustment that you have to make is just part of your growth. Uh-huh. Yeah. And think about this, right? The detour is still part of your journey, but one of the biggest mindset shifts you can make is this. The detour is not separate from your journey. It is still part of your journey. Yes. It may not look productive on the surface. It may feel slower than you want it. But detours often develop things that direct paths never could. Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah. What can detours develop? I'm glad you asked that question. I know you were thinking it. Patience. Detours often develop patience. Yeah, patience. Perspective, uh-huh. Resilience. Detours can often develop discernment. That is key. Oh yeah. And guess what else it can develop? Your self-awareness. Your self-awareness. And sometimes, you know what? The very season you wanted to skip ends up strengthening you in ways you'll need later. Uh-huh. Yeah. So think about it like this as well. What feels like loss time can become preparation time. Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. And you know, another reason detours feel painful is because we keep measuring where we are against where we thought we'd be. So I say this to you: stop measuring progress by the original plan. As long as you keep comparing your current reality to the original plan, peace will feel out of reach. Yeah. Yeah. It'll feel out of reach. Because the original plan is no longer the point of reference now, right? It is no longer the point of reference. So the question is no longer, why did this go? Why didn't this go the way I expected? But the better question is this. What is this season asking me to learn? What is this season asking me to learn? Hmm. Hmm. That shift matters because it moves you from resistance about the detour to reflection. What are you supposed to be learning during the detour? Mm-hmm. We had to take a detour to dinner. And this is not like a life detour, but we had to take a detour to dinner last week. What did that teach us? It taught us a different way to get to the restaurant. We had a certain way that we're used to going, but there was an accident. And if you guys live in Georgia, you know good and well when there's an accident, they will shut the road down and have you sitting there for hours if you don't turn around and find a different way to go, right? And so that's what we had to do. We had to turn around, get out of the traffic, and find another way to get there. That's what that taught us, right? So sometimes the shift can move you from resistance, we didn't want to just sit there, to reflection. And when we went the other way, we found a different way to get to the same place that we've gone to several times. So just know that there's always purpose in the detour, right? And one of the hardest parts of a detour is believing that there's still value in the season that you're in. There is still value there, guys. When things don't unfold as planned, it can feel like everything has stalled. But purpose doesn't disappear just because the path changed. No. We were still on our way to the restaurant. The path changed. We had to go in a different direction, right? There's always purpose in learning. There's always purpose in learning. Yeah, yeah. Purpose. There's purpose in pausing. Yeah. There's purpose in regrouping. Yeah. And sometimes the detour reveals what the original path never would have shown you. Yes. Some new developments, perhaps. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah. It may reveal what truly matters to you. It may expose what no longer aligns with you. Uh-huh. And guess what? It may open a door you never would have considered otherwise. Oh, yes, that's what detours can do. The path may have changed, but purpose can still be present. Yes. Yes. So let's be clear. Making peace with the detour, it doesn't mean pretending that it was easy and it didn't hurt. Right? Yeah. Because your plans changed. And you know, it is disappointing. I get that, right? So it doesn't mean minimizing that, that disappointment, right? And it doesn't mean forcing yourself to be grateful until you've actually processed it, right? So yeah, you can't be so happy about the detour because you're you haven't processed it yet. So once you've processed it, then you can start making that peace. You can start acknowledging the reality of what just happened without letting it define the rest of your story. Okay. So what that says is this wasn't what I planned. This wasn't what I wanted, but guess what? I'm still here. I'm still standing. And there is still a way forward. Uh-huh. Yeah. So it's not denial. It's not avoidance. It's peace. That is the peace. That is the peace. Acceptance with openness. Acceptance with openness. Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, the next step matters more than the perfect plan. Yeah. So once you make peace with the detour, something important happens. Yeah. You stop obsessing over the route you lost because that's gone. That path is now gone. You're now on a different path, right? And so now you begin to focus on the step that's right in front of you. The step right in front of you. Not the whole plan. Not the entire outcome. Just the next step. Just the next step. Because forward movement often returns when you stop demanding certainty. We talked about that control. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes clarity comes after movement, not before it. So yeah, think about that. That movement forward. One conversation. One decision. One act of courage in a different direction. It's okay. That's enough. That's enough to begin again in a different direction. Yeah, it's okay. Yeah. So if you are in a season that feels different than what you expected, I want to leave you with this. What if this detour is not a delay, but part of your development? I'm gonna say that again because I want you to really think about this. What if this detour is not a delay, but a part of your development? Yeah. You've probably heard this before. Delay is not denial. So just because the path shifts, it doesn't mean you're not going to get to your destination. You're just gonna get there by a different way. Yeah, yeah. What if this season is preparing you for something you can't fully see yet? Wow. Think about that. And what would it look like to stop fighting the path you didn't choose, but start learning from the one you're on now? I'm gonna say that again. What would it look like to stop fighting the path you didn't choose and start learning from the one you're on? Yeah, yeah. Because peace doesn't come from getting back to the original plan. No, the peace comes from trusting that even here where you are, even now, your journey still has meaning and is still evolving. Yeah, the detour is not the end of your story. No, it's simply another part and another way of how you get there. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness, the detour is not the end of your story, it's simply another part and another way of how you get to your destination along your journey. Oh my goodness, yes, yes, yes. Well, guys, that is our show for today. Until next time, be encouraged, enlightened, and empowered. For more information about McLean career and life coaching or our incredible media director. Be sure to check out our information in the show notes. I am C. Renee McLean. Thank you for joining us today.

SPEAKER_00 19:04

Thank you for tuning in to the purpose and the pivot. If today's episode encouraged or inspired you, be sure to follow the show and share it with another woman who's navigating her own transition. For coaching support or to connect with C-Rene McLean directly, visit McLean Career and Life Coaching or schedule a consultation using the link in the show notes. Remember, your purpose evolves and you have permission to pivot. Until next time.