Ep. 1 - Stop Scrolling, Start Listening: A New Year with TASC

Ever wonder what teens actually want from a new year? We kick off Loud Enough by asking them directly, and the answers might surprise you. Think more sleep, less scrolling, better friendships, small wins that build momentum, and a deeper sense of purpose. We talk about why teens share goals with friends before adults, how to reduce pressure without lowering expectations, and what it takes to turn good intentions into everyday habits.

Our team breaks down a whole teen well-being approach, physical, social, emotional, mental, and environmental, so parents and mentors can see the full picture. We unpack how constant exposure to social media, global news, and school stress fuels silent trauma and comparison, and we offer practical ways to respond with support instead of judgment. Then we dig into the eight Cs of resilience, competence, confidence, connection, character, contribution, coping, control, and compassion, and share real stories of teens growing these muscles through service, skill-building, and low-stakes practice that leads to high-stakes readiness.

We also spotlight teen parents, who balance their own growth with caring for a child. From play dates that rebuild community to step-by-step plans for licenses, jobs, and childcare, we focus on connection and dignity. Throughout, our goal is simple: shift the question from “What’s wrong with teens?” to “What’s happening to teens?” and respond with tools that build autonomy and safety. If you care about youth mental health, positive youth development, and raising resilient, confident teens, this premiere sets the tone for a year of honest, actionable conversations.

Subscribe, share with someone who supports teens, and leave a review with one insight you’re taking into your week.

Transcript

Launching Loud Enough

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Let me help you want to say helping. Let me help you understand. So now listen.

SPEAKER_01 0:28

Happy New Year and welcome to our new podcast, Loud Enough. From the Teen Action and Support Center. I'm Dawn Sprague, co-founder and CEO at Task, and also a licensed therapist and a certified youth mental health first aid instructor. And I have three colleagues and wonderful guests here with me today. I'm gonna have them each introduce themselves as well.

SPEAKER_03 0:55

I am Angela Smith, the Director of Youth Empowerment Programs at Task. I have been with the Teen Action and Support Center for a little over four years now. And I have the pleasure. Well, my unofficial name is Director of Fun. I do the afterschool programming with teens at both of our county sites.

SPEAKER_02 1:16

And I'm Raina Martinez. I'm the director of First Steps and Next Steps, and I've been working with teens for about eight years now. I mainly focus with teen parents and also teen parents to be. So just working with teens who have graduated as well with their next steps group. I'm Heidi Metzen.

SPEAKER_04 1:34

I'm the lead therapist at the Restore for Task. I'm a licensed associate counselor and a certified rehabilitation counselor, meaning I will work with a lot of clients that have disabilities.

Purpose And Audience

New Year, Teen Resolutions

SPEAKER_01 1:46

Thank you. Thank you all for being here today. Loud Enough is a podcast that we decided would be helpful for parents and for adults that work with teenagers and also for teens as well. We're hoping to be able to create some safe space for teenagers to be able to share some of their challenges for adults to come alongside and figure out how to support them. So going forward, we will have additional guests beside my colleagues here, but also we'll have teens that'll come on, some other experts that will help us just kind of navigate through what it's like to be an adolescent and how we can best support them. So that's our goal for Loud Enough as we get started. It's just a happy new year. Happy New Year. Happy to year. We're starting a new year. A lot of people are saying new year, new you. But what we wanted to do is just really kind of talk a little bit about this new space that we have and how we are dealing with teenagers at the beginning of this new year. And so I did a little bit of research on what are some of the top uh new year resolutions that teenagers make. Interestingly enough, when I did that, uh when I put that into chat, it came back as well, this is what their resolutions. We do that a lot. We we tell teenagers what they should be doing. And so, but what we're more interested in really is what are their resolutions? So I'm just curious, you all of you are working with teenagers. What have you heard? What are some of the new year resolutions that some of our teenagers are making? Love that you have asked.

What Teens Say They Want

SPEAKER_03 3:31

Oh, good. I did a little boots on the ground research this week. And in addition to the funny looks I got as to why I am being bold on this right now, I received a lot of input that struck me as very personal, very right now focused versus adults can often get stuck in what's my five-year plan? What's my 10-year plan? Where do I think my life is supposed to be going? Leaps and bounds from now, as opposed to, I think it'd be cool if tomorrow my life included this. What I heard primarily from the teens was my New Year's resolution is to sleep more. My body needs it. My New Year's resolution is to move my body more, to pass all my classes, to enjoy my life this year, to get closer to God, to be more whimsical. I don't have time for resolutions. I have to make it through this school year. And I haven't thought about it yet because they are facing what's in front of them right now.

SPEAKER_01 4:40

Right now. Yeah. Those are those are good. Those are great. How about you? Is that enough? What have you been hearing?

Screens, Scrolling, And Overwhelm

SPEAKER_02 4:46

So one of the things that we did with our teens was um 2026 ins and outs. And one of the biggest like goals that was like at the very top of the list for the groups I've been working with is decreasing the scrolling time on their phones. Oh yeah. Um, you know, I was actually reading an article and it was talking about like um teenagers between like the ages of 13 to 19 will spend between four to six hours. And then like some higher teens between like high school could have spent up to nine hours. And I was just so shocked by that. But as I was doing the groups, you know, they're saying, oh my goodness, like I just after the day, like I just feel overwhelmed. And like it's a coping mechanism of like, I just don't want to spend so much time just on my phone. Like, I really want to go out and be active and you know, um, working with teen parents. They're like, I want to take my kid on a walk, go to go to the park and just have more intentional time instead of just on my phone, scrolling, watching TikTok. And I'm like, you guys, that's taking your time. That's what I call it, because it's just taking your time, and it really does add up.

SPEAKER_01 5:49

So that was like one of the goals, it's less screen time. It's interesting that you said that because I think a lot of adults are saying the same thing, less scrolling time. And we tend to think that only teenagers are the ones addicted to their phones. Um, and so that's that's really an interesting way to understand their solutions are the same often as adults. So how about you?

Friend Support Versus Adult Pressure

SPEAKER_04 6:10

Yeah, mine because I work one-on-one with my clients, I'll get a little a little more inside information, but I do like all of these things that you mentioned, I find those come up. The scrolling, I find my younger clients loving their scrolling, aren't gonna give it up. Those that are, you know, high school in college, they're a little more like, yeah, I'm gonna turn some of those apps off. I'm going to not look at Instagram. It doesn't always last very long, but they are at least like giving, they're trying. And the relationships, I find the majority of my clients are like, I'm gonna be a better friend this year. I'm gonna listen more. I'm going to do these little things to step out and make a friend. So important. I see it throughout the year, but I do see it as like the beginning of the year because they've had off of school. They've had this head break.

Small Wins And Self-Grace

SPEAKER_01 7:09

Had a break. So there's some time to think about it. Yeah. Yeah. Reflect a little. Okay. So here's a little bit. It speaks to what all of you all have said, a little bit about what um what chat came up with and some of the top resolutions. A lot of personal growth and really focused on habits, right? Like not so much changing like my whole life scheme, but just a little different habits that they know can make a difference. Um, academic and future-focused kind of goals, like study more, um, do better in school, that kind of thing, improve my grades. We hear that uh kind of a lot. And then relationship and kindness, I love that it was categorized that way, just to be kinder. I think our teens are experiencing the um the challenges with people being mean-spirited, either adults or other students around them. And so they they are kind of trying to make commitments to be kinder. Um, one thing I thought was great was stop gossiping. I thought that was a great resolution. Right. So um spend more meaningful time with friends and family and then volunteer or help others. I think we have a generation coming up that's really committed to uh taking time to be better people with others, you know, and I I love that too. So um, yeah, so I I wonder, Heidi, I was wondering if um if if you feel like teens are feeling more accomplished, like when they when they make resolutions and they actually get them done, how are they feeling about that?

SPEAKER_04 8:46

Oh, when they get them done, yeah, there's an absolute like, I did this, I feel good about myself. Um I don't find that they get as down when they don't make those. It's like like it might it doesn't like with an adult will be like, yeah, I didn't pull that off. But my teens, I feel like they they're like, okay, I'm gonna give it another try. It's just not as devastating, maybe. It's like, okay, I'm gonna get back in there.

SPEAKER_01 9:12

They give themselves a little grace. A little grace, yeah. They love that. You know, I uh some of my clients, some of the students that I see in counseling, a lot of times they they don't want to tell people their resolutions. Do you all do y'all hear that sometimes, yeah. They're kind of afraid to to tell people their resolutions because if other people know and they don't come through, then uh a lot of times they, you know, get chastised for that. They didn't try hard enough. Or if they make a resolution and they're doing really well at it, nobody even notices. I wonder if, do you hear that, Angela? I know a lot of fairy meds are talking about that.

Whole Teen Well-Being Framework

SPEAKER_03 9:53

And honestly, it relieves me to not be alone there. I thought I was the only one. Um absolutely, there is that element of once I tell my parents, it's real and that makes it real, versus this is just something I'm trying on and I hope it fits me in my life, and I'm great at it, but it's not the end of the world if it doesn't happen and it's not a reflection on me and who I am. As I was speaking with some of the teens in our space over the last couple of weeks about what their resolutions are, their goals for themselves for this next year. I then asked them, and who have you talked to about this yet? Resoundingly, the answer is my friends. And what I would push a little bit deeper on, why were they the first people that you turned to? What benefit is it in telling your friends? And the support is the answer I got. The element of they can see me for who I am. I can be my most real, authentic self around my peers. They both understand the challenges to me, aren't going to judge me if I don't make it, but will help me problem solve, versus there being an expectation on them once they disclose their goals. It's really more of I can be more myself and just tell you what I'm thinking. It's just a narrating their thoughts out loud process when it's telling your friends versus if I tell mom, dad, and Aunt Patty, then I have to live up to it and really run that 5K. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:21

More pressure. Yes. More pressure comes from adults. Not that we're dealing out the pressure, but I think, of course, I think teens just feel it, which is developmentally appropriate that that they know that people their age get them better and understand them better. So yeah, that's that's really good. What what do you hear, Dana, from teens? That you have teen parents and and young um teens that are getting ready to be young parents. And so, yeah, how are they feeling?

Stress, Exposure, And Silent Trauma

SPEAKER_02 11:49

They're feeling definitely the pressure, I think, of just like balancing life and also a tiny little human as well, and also having like that sense of self of like accomplishing their goals. Um, I think like Angela said, you know, it's easier to tell our friends, especially cut the groups and stuff, they're telling each other just because it's easier to have that support of like, okay, well, they're in that same life stage as I am, you know. And I think that sometimes as adults, we can come off a little bit intimidating, you know. Um we can always say, like, um, we talked about the social media thing, and that's another thing. If you watch the reels of like you watch someone do their whole day and how they're accomplishing their goals, it's so overwhelming. Like, how am I gonna get from, you know, from point A to point B in like five seconds? Well, it's not realistic, right? It's not realistic. And I think just the way we talk to our teens of like, you know, just making the goal smaller and like watching celebrating the wins. I know the teens say a lot of treat yourself or like, yeah, like if you know, if you went two weeks to the gym or if you went outside for 20 minutes, like just celebrating those wins. And I think that's one of the big things that the teens were talking about. It's just like, you know, treat yourself and like just accomplishing that.

SPEAKER_01 13:06

I love that. They're giving themselves permission to be proud and to yeah, and to kind of reward themselves. Yep, yep.

SPEAKER_02 13:12

And not putting that much pressure of like we have to be perfect and have it done, like, you know, just celebrating those moments. So good. Yes, that is good to hear. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:23

Do you have any reflection?

SPEAKER_04 13:24

Well, I'm just thinking about how I'm I'm just really appreciating teens and how they're take, you know, they're really taking, like, I'm gonna try this and then I'm gonna still feel good about myself. I'm not going to turn this into something where I'm feeling down and unaccomplished. And take taking the small steps and taking those small wins and you know, stepping outside for a little while. And I I like that. And I think that adults could learn a lot from that. Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 13:54

I think I do, I know. I think it's a huge power to that exploratory mindset of I'm still figuring it out. I'm still seeing things, doing things, testing things, and I don't have to have it all figured out by the time I go to sleep tonight versus adults often approach from this is what I've learned, and this is what I should be doing.

Social Media And Imposter Syndrome

Unique Pressures On Teen Parents

The Eight Cs Of Resilience

SPEAKER_01 14:13

And well, that's a whole brain thing. We'll probably have a podcast on that. Teen brain development and kind of where they are, right? So for teenagers, you know, they're it focused on reward loops, but because their brain's not as developed as the adult brain, like we don't, they don't have to have it all figured out because they're learning as they go. So I love that. That's yeah, that's really great. One of the things I noticed when I was looking through all of these uh resolutions is how they fit into this whole teen well-being approach that we have at the Teen Action and Support Center. And um, so I wanted to talk about that a little bit today, about what that means. It's language that we use a lot. I know we we um have incorporated that into kind of our whole scheme of programming. And when I say whole teen well-being, it kind of covers some of these resolutions. It's really um physical, like their physical well-being. We're pretty familiar with that, their health, their nutrition, their sleep habits, all of the things that that feed into like your physical self exercise. We know how important that is for students. And so there's physical, then there is um social, which is really a lot about what teenagers are. Like their friends are very important. Um, but social well-being is critical developmentally. And so we, I'm sure we'll have a podcast on blogging and the effects of that because uh we know that when students are harmed in the in the social environment, it's much more difficult than it is for adults because we can either brush it off or ignore them. That's not something that our teens can do, but it's so important to be social. And so social well-being becomes an important part of like making better friends or spending more time with my friends, that kind of thing. And then there's this emotional and mental health and well-being. Those are terms we're using quite a bit culturally. We're talking about those. Sometimes we use them interchangeably, but just to be clear from a well-being standpoint, mental health is really how people think, how they process and how they take in information. It's also academics, like how students are able to learn and process the material that they get, that kind of thing. Um, but it's also critical to their mental and emotional health and well-being as well. So emotional is really, especially for teenagers, is really this naming my emotions and learning to regulate them, which we see a lot in a counseling setting, right? And we see it in all of our settings, but and but being able to integrate that mental and emotional, um, those processes, both sides of the brain, um, that's pretty critical. And we know that there's a crisis situation for our adolescents right now in being able to do that well. And so, so that's a well-being factor and that that we deal with, and also an environmental. And when I say that, I don't just mean like what's the physical environment, the air we breathe, and all of those kind of things, but also the environments that our teenagers are in. So the systems that they are a part of, school systems and judicial systems and family systems and all of that. So when we talk about our students are making these resolutions, but we as people who work with teens and communities who are supporting teens, we have to think in those terms as well, that whole teen well-being kind of approach. And so I want to talk about that a little bit, just um what what you see, some of the challenges that teens are facing in some of these areas of well-being. A lot of people will ask me, what's wrong with teens today? Um, and I tell them there's there are a lot of things happening to teens today. There's not anything wrong with them. Uh, they're learning how to respond. Hopefully they'll learn to respond well. But there are challenges out there. And so there's physical, social, emotional, mental, environmental challenges. So I'm wondering a little bit about what you're seeing and um with the teens that you're working with in different areas.

SPEAKER_04 18:43

I feel like all of those pieces play, you know, when we talk about our teens and their whole health, and we think about all the things that they have to deal with every day and how they don't really have control over a lot of those things that you said that we were talking about that yesterday. And, you know, they don't have control over, you know, um going to school or how the household runs or um how social media affects them, how politics affects them. And I think we forget that teens are aware of all of these things. All of these things they know they come in and they are overwhelmed with and and I feel bad sometimes. I'm like, wow, I didn't even think you would think about what's happening in politics or what's happening. And they are because they have access, so much access they can see it all. And I feel like they're really trying to get through the day and to get through just like their emotional well being becomes it it's hindered sometimes because of all of the pieces they have to think about. And we're talking about the brain's not completely ready to do all of that, it's not not quite. So it's um it causes, I think, feel like a lot of stress. And that's why we have tasks.

SPEAKER_01 20:04

Yes. Yes. And there there are, especially in the emotional and mental health kind of arenas, there are a lot of things happening to teens because of some of the exposures that they have and accesses that they have. And there's a lot of what we call silent trauma. And so things are happening that people don't even know about. And students are reacting to those things in ways that make no sense to an adult or to the people around them that are serving them. And so that's one of, I think that's another kind of environmental piece, like access to the internet and social media certainly exacerbate that in a lot of ways, but just the exposures that they're having in other systems, it's it's really it can be a real challenge. So agree. Yeah. What are you saying?

Belonging Through Contribution

SPEAKER_03 20:54

Very interesting how on that point, a perhaps tool or a platform of the internet that was designed to increase our connectivity, in part, of course, productivity and capitalism and all this as well, but designed social media platforms to give us the illusion of deeper connection has now turned into something that for most of human history, we were not designed or expected to have the capacity to keep up with any more than the happenings of the 60 to 100 people in our village. And now they're being asked to keep up with every single thing that happens to every single person on the face of the entire earth. And it's a very different burden of expectations. Certainly, it does affect them. A different social environment. Yes, like really. Very much so. I love speaking about the challenges that our teens today are facing globally and in my community is one of my favorite things. It's a platform that working at Task has given me and just advocating for the experience of these young people is one of the most treasured parts of my life. I believe there is so much imposter syndrome happening today. Just this idea of they know what they want, they know what they want to see, they know who they want to be, they know what they want their lives to look like, and they can't envision that as them. They can't see that life being for them. They don't see themselves as deserving, they don't see themselves oftentimes as capable, or I can't get from here to there. That will never be my life. That's not me. But this is what a good life would look like theoretically. There are, I love that you mentioned the lack of autonomy and control. Maybe 85% of the things happening in their world that they want to be different, they can't do anything about. They can't even drive themselves where they want to go. They can't even get ice cream with friends without asking mom and dad if it's okay and can they have money? And they just don't have a lot, they don't have their adult world licenses yet. They have all the thoughts, the exposure, the ideas, and the opinions, but they don't have the ability to act on it completely yet, to create their own worlds. And that, yep, that social media piece is it is just huge. It is huge on impacting who they think they are, who they think they should be, seeing the highlight reels. Like Rainan was saying, you're seeing someone else's highlight reel, you're living in your behind the scenes. How on earth do you rectify the two without thinking less of yourself? Sure. Yeah, that comparison piece. Right.

Connection And Stigma For Teen Parents

SPEAKER_02 23:31

And to kind of feed off of um what Angela just said, does that imposter syndrome with young adults? Like we're talking about um, I'm sorry, with young parents. Um we add all of these key factors that we just talked about of, you know, like still finding that sense of self and like what they want for themselves, their schools, their streams, and then um challenges when they are those young parents. Like, how do we continue to have them like grasp their dreams and goals um and not lose the sense of self? And you know, now they're like, oh my baby, and focusing on the baby. Um, and also like, but I also don't have my driver's license yet. So those are some of the challenges that we have in discussing of like, well, you know, I want a job and I want to be able to drive myself and get my driver's license. Um, and they're still trying to figure it out. And now they have this tiny human that they're also trying to figure it out. And is um my baby hitting the milestones that they need to be hitting. So it's just a lot of challenges for sure. Like, especially once, you know, are you are working with um teen parents is you're dealing with regular um teenager emotions and obstacles, and now you're dealing with um just baby obstacles as well. So yeah.

Practicing Compassion And Perspective

Control, Safety, And Healthy Autonomy

SPEAKER_01 24:46

And trying to be a good parent as well, all of those. And and that requires a whole community of support, which which I think is uh just an additional challenge that that some of our um some of our young parents are facing. So all of you kind of mentioned the a word or two that falls into what how we understand resiliency building. And so I want to talk about that a little bit too. Y'all are setting us up like for really good conversation, but um in a positive youth development model, which I'm hoping that people who are listening are understanding that that is a it's a shift. It's a shift away from a problem-focused model to really helping uh teens evaluate what their assets are, what their um what their futures could be from a very strength-based kind of foundation. And so we work with that. I know that that you all um personally work with from that particular framework, but we work from that framework at the Teen Action and Support Center. And it's really about helping students um elevate their voices loud enough for adults to kind of hear what it is that they're trying to say. And so helping them through this transition into adulthood really requires resiliency building. And so um, so you mentioned control, that was one of the things and coping. And and so uh so I just wanted to share, talk a little bit about um those C's of resiliency. So uh in a positive youth development model, there are five. If you if you do any research on resiliency building, there's lots of C's. But um, Dr. Kenneth Ginsberg, who is um currently the attending physician, I wrote this down in the division of adolescence, um, adolescent medicine and a co-director at the Center for Parent and Teen Communication in Philadelphia. He's developed kind of these seven C's. And so I know Angela's really familiar with this because we had a training uh around this the Cs that we use. And there's five over here and there's seven over here. And so we talked about the things we do at the Teen Action and Support Center, and we came up with eight. So we've kind of done some merging, a little, a little bit of merging. And so I'm just gonna run through those seven C's, and I want to talk a little bit about how adults who are working with teens and how teens themselves maybe can really get focused on um being intentional about resiliency building, because we know that that's a really uh key indicator for um positive self-regard and self-efficacy and teens doing well as adults and adults doing well as well. So and so here they are. It's the seven C's, and then we've added in the eighth C that comes from the positive youth development model. The first is confidence, like really knowing that you have a capability to do something, which um feeds right into the second thing, which is confidence. And so I'm gonna share my little story. I was talking to Angela about this earlier, but um, when I was a teenager, I grew up in New York, and my dad said before, you can get your driver's license and drive by yourself. You have to be able to pass dad's competency test. It's not regular driving license test. And it included being able to change my tires. Road, yeah, change a tire, flat tire. Ultimate dad move, right?

SPEAKER_05 28:18

And I was like, oh my god, ultimate move.

Bridging Parents And Teens With Compassion

Closing, Resources, And Next Steps

SPEAKER_01 28:22

Yep. Um, check my oil, jump a battery, had to be able to do that. And then I had to be able to drive in the snow, and that entailed going to the school parking lot when the snow was very deep and bringing the speed of the car up and then hitting the brakes so you could figure out how to get out of a slide. So it was actually super fun, I think, when I was a teenager, terrifying as an adult for sure. But um, but teaching me to change a tire and then making me practice. So he made me rotate my tires occasionally so that I didn't forget how to do it was this incredible competency builder for me, which was also a confidence builder. Because the first time I got a flat tire on a road and a dark road before cell phones, uh I didn't have to call anybody. I knew that I could take care of myself and that I could get it managed. And I've used that skill so many times since that I've changed tires on my car often, which sounds terrible because I get a lot of flat tires. But but competency building is just it's very critical for for our teens. And it's not limited to academics. You know, I think being good in math and no, you know, being a good writer or, you know, following some of our academic challenges, I think that that's really important. But the competency that I can take care of myself super big and a super confidence builder, which is number two. The third is connection. So you've already kind of talked to it, talked about it a little bit in terms of um our teenagers know that they need to be connected to people. And I think they know they need that to be healthy whenever they can find healthy relationships. Character, I think that's one of the things that we um have done a good job in school environments and other environments for teens where they know that I'm I'm of good character when I do these things, even if nobody's looking. Contribution is a big one. Um, this idea that um I can make a difference. And we heard it in the resolutions, right? Like I want to volunteer more. I want to know that I can contribute to the world around me. Coping is a big deal. Um, when you're a teenager, you're learning to cope. They don't know how to cope, or they create coping mechanisms that are not helpful. And if there's trauma involved anywhere in someone's life, they develop unhealthy coping skills. We know that. Um, so coping is a big deal and then control. Y'all have said it. And we just kind of mentioned it in some form, but that's a normal part of development for our teenagers, right? This idea that um I have some autonomy, I can be in control of some of the things um that are going on in my life. And I think that that's critical that they begin to get control. Because if they have no control, then when they're legally adults, they get their what do you call it? They Oh, adult world license. Yeah, the adult world license, when they get that, then they can be out of control. And so we we want to make sure that we create these healthy control patterns. And then the last one that we added into these original seven C's from uh Dr. Ginsburg is caring and compassion. And I think a lot of people expect teenagers to automatically be empathic and to understand what it's like. And I hear I have parents who say they think money grows on the on trees. They have no idea where money comes from. It comes from mom, it comes from dad, it you know, it comes from somebody else. So it's a learning thing, like being able to be to have empathy toward other people is a developed skill. Absolutely. So I wanted to talk, wanted to put those seven C's out there, eight C's really. I wanted to put those out and just kind of talk through a little bit about how you see those things happening in the areas where you're working with teenagers currently. Um, what are some of the really effective things that help teenagers um develop some of these? And maybe the adults around them can kind of find ways to incorporate those. Love that. Well, it's what we do all day, every day.

SPEAKER_03 32:38

Yeah. I when it comes to competence, a lot of times what they're gaining the most competence in is not what we have expressed to them as the goal for the day being. And what I mean is we have life skills workshops as part of our programming at the Teen Action and Support Center. So sure, there are days where they can see on their little account, come learn about money, finance 101. They'll sign up for it, they'll come learn about money, they'll gain competence in that area. But then there are a lot of days where what we're telling them is you're volunteering at a nursing home today. And what are they gaining? Empathy, caring, competency in those soft skills. You have to be, if you are sitting down alone engaging in a conversation with someone who's 89 and has dementia, you have to have conversation skills. You have to be able to look outside of yourself and bypass the awkwardness and keep a conversation going and see the bigger picture of they're still getting interaction today, even if they maybe can't physically do the craft that I brought for them. There is so much that they're gaining on them as a byproduct that maybe is not even the listed goal of the day that just life experience is bringing them. But absolutely, they are getting competence in practicing for taking their driving test. So when they get there and they log into the computer, it's not the first time they're seeing a simulation of this test. They've seen these questions before. So they've had a dry run. Just getting to experience those things in a low pressure, no-stakes setting is really helpful for when the pressure's on and they're really out there in the big world all alone without us right there by them. So it's not the first time that they're encountering a lot of these concepts or these skills, everything from the college and the career prep, the financial literacy and budgeting to the soft skills and even the healthy relationship and how to handle conflict. So those go very far to just like you said, boosting their confidence and self-esteem, who they see themselves as, what they see themselves as being able to do. I think it's incredibly important. I'll let yes, I'll let you all talk as well about all the things we do.

SPEAKER_01 35:09

I think that there is this incredible sense of contribution, right? Like I'm contributing to somebody else's life or joy or whatever. I think that that's that's so important.

SPEAKER_03 35:23

It goes to their belonging more than anything else I've seen. Obviously, the social element of they need social skills and they need connection. But the number one thing that I've seen directly increase their sense of belonging is building that idea in them that I belong where I am and I have something to offer the world around me. I brought actually, I brought a quote from one of our teens with me. I just have to share it. Okay, so we did a little interview with him earlier this year, and he told us I joined Task because I was home alone, bored, and not putting into my community. So I searched for volunteer options online. I just wanted friends and to get out of my house, but Task gave me so much more than what I was looking for. I always thought that I was not a very helpful person because I'm not good at a lot of things, but I am definitely better at putting myself to work than I originally assumed I was. So I absolutely love hearing that from their own words and just the space that it creates in them for I don't have to be great at everything, but I have my thing that it matters that I'm here and I am that and I can give that.

SPEAKER_01 36:39

Yeah, I think I I think that sense of belonging is so um so wonderful. I'll tell a quick story. Just um we were planning one time a number of years ago, we were planning to go to um to uh a nursing home and provide just to kind of a like a party, and the students got to plan it and they called it dance a palooza, I think. That's kind of amazing. And they and they were trying to come up with like the right uh song set. And so they were like, what's you know, they were kind of googling, I think at the time, like what what what songs do old people? This is how they said it, um, want to listen to. And then one of the kids asked me, they said, Hey, do you think old people eat Doritos? And I was like, Why are you asking me this? Like, like like I'm the expert on old people, I guess. But anyway, it was so funny. They were just so engaged in like wanting someone else to have fun and and make sure that it met up with what those people would would enjoy. It was so great. I loved it.

SPEAKER_03 37:43

Being around teens every day, I can attest that DJ of the day and Doritos are two of the most important things in their life.

SPEAKER_01 37:49

So I can see all of it happening. It's important. It's it really is, it's important. How about you in terms of like understanding resiliency and young adults, which we um, you know, the work that we are doing, the work that you are doing too, um, is really just to to help them become the best version of themselves as adults, um, but also as parents. And so, yeah, talk a little bit about what what are some of the C's that are really critical for our young parents.

SPEAKER_02 38:19

So I would say the biggest one is definitely connection. I think um, you know, fitting in with their peers, they might feel like an outcast, especially as being a young parent. Um, I think that, you know, I call them more traditional mindsets of like we have such a negative mindset over teen pregnancy. Um, and I know that sometimes um when teens are a teen friend, you know, a teen parent, um they're scared, they feel ashamed, um, they almost like kind of want to hide into that background of um, you know, I feel singled out, I can go do this activity because um I have a baby to think about, I have a uh, you know, a toddler to think about. Um, and one of the biggest things is like when we are doing our programs or just working with teens is that creating that connection with others, um providing, you know, safe space with other teens. And I think that when they are with other teen parents, they're able to just not feel so alone and not feel like it's such an like this negative thing that has happened in life. Um, and it also just empowers with like coping, um, but also like just allowing them to like really, you know, grasp their dreams and their um goals as well. Of like, you know, we talked about this of like um just that sense of self as well. Um and so just like working with like the teen parents and just like the compassion and caring and just like learning, you know, um those like C's and all the stuff. So yeah. It creates a sense of belonging.

SPEAKER_01 39:56

Yeah, it's a sense of belonging. We all know like that's yeah, like one of the things. I love that one program-wise that that we do in in first steps and now in next steps, which is beyond graduation, is um those play dates. The play dates. Yeah. Because, you know, as young moms and dads, I think, you know, just being able to be around other people. And I think we forget that teenagers need that too, if they're parents as well. So love that. That's such a great thing. How about you? How about that?

SPEAKER_04 40:23

Compassion. I feel like that's just such because of all the things that your story and and what your story, like all of them, like help build compassion in our teachings. Yeah. And I think it helps them to have a better understanding of the world around them when they can develop compassion. So I do spend because I will hear a lot of, well, my parent did this, or I'm mad about my parent doing this. And so we talk about the whys of why parents do the things they do.

SPEAKER_05 40:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 41:00

And all the things, the stresses that they may have not to devalue what's going on for teens, but there's, oh, makes sense. That makes sense now. And then, and we actually talk about it. Like that's how we develop compassion when we shift our perspective. Yes. And look outside ourselves. So I feel like that's such an important one. And it allows them to go out into the world and not feel as afraid or insecure when they're making connections or when they're volunteering, or or when they're all of a sudden they meet another team. It's like, hey, having compassion for someone. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 41:40

Hi, you're speaking my language. It's like an old work at ask or something.

SPEAKER_01 41:43

I love it. Like we all do kind of the same thing. Yeah. I love that. And we do. One of the things Heidi and I were talking about, and we've kind of mentioned too, is the sense of control. And I think it's probably one of the biggest challenges for adults and parents who are working with teens, you know, that that change over from I have a lot of control over your life as an adult to I need to give you control is a bit terrifying, as, you know, um, because there's we too are exposed to so much on social media, on the news, and that kind of thing, that the fear factor just rises tremendously. And so I love that you talked about helping teenagers understand that that adults and parents are afraid, that a lot of the restrictions and the guidance and the, you know, things that we put in their way is really a protective factor. Um, and sometimes that's done out of fear. But the reality is that they do have to have control. And if we don't allow for it, I've already kind of talked about that a little bit, but if we don't allow for it, then they begin to control in unhealthy ways. And that's that becomes a mental and emotional challenge that we deal with a lot in counseling. And so, um, and if there is trauma, we know that developmentally, when there's trauma, um, when someone is put in a situation where they have no control or they feel like they have no control um and they were unsafe, then then having control also equals safety. And so we have to kind of figure those some of those things out for our teenagers because we do want them to have healthy control um and be able to navigate themselves as adults. So um, so all of these C's, um, all eight of them, or however many more there might be that help build resiliency in teens, I think are important parts of programs in in our, you know, in our community, but also in schools and in homes and in judicial systems uh for people to understand that the the environment that our teens are in really do require us to help them build resiliency so they can be the best and best version of themselves, which is what what we are shooting for at task. Any other last minute? I know we've kind of covered a lot. It's a new year, new resolutions. We've talked about whole teen well-being and all of the seas of resiliency and positive youth development. So we've covered a lot, and I appreciate the input from all of you. Any last things you'd like to like to share before we finish up today?

SPEAKER_04 44:31

I have I I we're talking about compassion and then speaking about trauma. Um, and this is another episode, but I think while I'm, you know, talking to my teens and I'm saying this is maybe why your parents are doing this. I'm also talking to parents about remembering that your teen had trauma, where if there was trauma, like remember that they had trauma and what that looks like for their emotional development and their compassionate development. And all of their perspectives get um mixed up in there, they get skewed, and parents, and that is what's wrong with my kid? And it's like take a step back. And and and let's talk about perspective and compassion for the teen and the teen. So I it goes both ways, but I think that that is such an important piece that I deal with a with students.

SPEAKER_03 45:28

Yeah, it's so interesting to hear. I'm you probably more so than Raina or myself have that interface with the parents, um, versus we are direct with the teens most of the time. So I'm not hearing a lot of that pushback. Um, but that is so interesting to hear. And I know that is a lot of the narrative that we are in the position to be able to help shift around teens. It's not that they don't care, it's that they don't know. They haven't yet gotten to meet that person that's so incredibly different from them that they care about and respect to be able to envision their perspective, like you were saying. They have a lot of care. They have a lot of compassion. I haven't met a single teen that doesn't have compassion. They just haven't maybe yet always had the exposure to the different environments and situations and people and places to get a chance to care about somebody in that walk of life or somebody that different from themselves, but they absolutely care. They're so passionate and they have this crazy idea that they can change the world and love it. They turn it all upside down. So keep building the compassion. How do you do it?

SPEAKER_01 46:41

Yeah, I love that um the that question, you know, what's what's wrong with you? Um, Oprah Winfrey and um Dr. Bruce Perry have a great book called Um What Happened to You? You know, it's like what what happened that made you feel like you can't express yourself or you can't do these things? It's sweet, it's a great book, um, but it kind of speaks to that. And so that's kind of my curiosity is like, I wonder what's happening with you, what what's what's happening in your um environments and or what has happened to you that's kind of made you be protective or um not able to be or feel safe. So I I think that there are different questions we can be asking for sure, and different ways we can be speaking and narrating um how it is to be a teenager. And that's kind of what Loud Enough is is all about. Anything from you, Raina?

SPEAKER_02 47:38

Um no, just I would say if you're like working close with teens or you have teens in your life, and you know, that you just really like pour into them and like just empower them, you know, just give them that sense of self and um just hear them out. They have a lot to say and you know, like they show that compassion and they really do want to be that change um in that the world wants to see.

SPEAKER_01 48:00

So yeah, okay. Well, appreciate all of you and all of our new listeners. We're glad that you joined us today and hope that at least this first episode might be a little bit helpful. And we hope that you'll join us again. We will be uh doing a monthly podcast. We'll have uh a specific theme each week and some wonderful people to help uh guide us through uh understanding teens and understanding how to be better support. Uh, if you would like to follow the Teen Action and Support Center, you can follow us on social media. We're on all the platforms, but also our website is TASCNWA.org. So tasknwa.org. And we'd love for you to follow us. And also if you if there's things that we can do to support what you are doing in your work with teens, whether you're a parent or um working in a system and or an agency that works with teenagers, we'd love to be a part of that. If you want to support our work, there's an opportunity for you to do that as well. And we are so glad to have had you and want to wish you happy new year.