Charlie Faye

Welcome back! Sorry I took a brief pause for LIFE! Music, motherhood, travel...it's all a lot but I'm now back in the swing with some great new conversations lined up for you for late spring! Right before things got nutty in March, I sat down with my friend Charlie Faye to talk about her version of motherhood in the music industry. 

A lifelong musician herself, Charlie enjoys bridging the gap between artists and industry as a manager. She was chosen to participate in Austin Music Foundation's Leaders in Austin Music program, and was named a Changemaker by Austin Woman Magazine in recognition of her services for musicians, music businesses, and music nonprofits. Charlie has spoken on panels at conferences like AmericanaFest and Folk Alliance International. She has also dedicated her time to working on projects related to affordable housing for artists. 

Charlie has formed fun projects like The Fayettes & the Fanimals (a super fun kids album if you need some new driving music with the kiddos!) which we will talk about and I think it's important to note that she is the first mom on here who is a single/solo parent so we will get a chance to dive into what that version of parenting is like as well.

Charlie is currently an artist manager & head of artist services for Traffic Music Group where she helps steer the careers of Somebody Someone, Judy Blank, Dylan Leblanc, Jon Muq, Quentin, Lew Apollo and others. 

About Charlie Faye

Listen to Charlie Faye (& The Fayettes)

Listen to Charlie Faye & the Fanimals (kids album!)

Follow Charlie Faye

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:07

This is a song for all the lost mamas holding their babies in the middle of the night. Wondering who makes the town now, who keeps running your mind out.

SPEAKER_03 0:22

Hey friend, welcome back to another mother. Very excited to get this thing kind of back up and running. As you may have noticed, uh there was a long there was a long break. Uh, I get very busy in the spring. Uh this spring in particular was insanity with gigs. So I had to sort of put the podcast on pause for a second. But before it got super crazy, during March, right before South by Southwest hit uh our town of Austin, Texas, I had the great pleasure of talking to my friend Charlie Faye. Uh and Charlie Faye is a lot of things. I think this is gonna be a fun podcast because it's kind of a different uh version of motherhood. Charlie Fay, longtime singer-songwriter, performer, musician. She had a great band called the Fayettes. We'll talk about a kind of a 60s Motown throwback girl group. Uh, she did that for many years and then she became a mom and realized she did not want to do that anymore. It was not quite pulling her as strongly. And she found herself being called to consult and manage more, move into uh that part of the industry which she had always kind of been dabbling in, consulting for musicians and project management for record releases, helping friends do all those uh many things. So she is now an artist manager at Traffic Music Group. She is co-owner of Daydream Believer Creative along with Adrian Lake. They do artist management, publicity consulting, event planning, all kinds of things. Uh so she wears a lot of different hats these days, kind of more in the music business side of things. Uh and she also has put out a great children's album. When she became a mom, she started writing kids songs and it's wonderful. Uh Charlie Faye and the Phanimals, check it out. So we'll talk about all of the many transitions and things she has done in her musical world as a mom. And I also think it's important to mention she is the first single mom, solo parent who I have interviewed for the podcast. So we'll get a very different perspective on parenting in that way as well. So thank you for being here. I hope you enjoy our conversation. Okay. Charlie Fay, welcome to another mother. Thanks. Thanks for being here, friend. I'm really excited to talk to you today. Uh, because, well, a few different reasons. One, I just always enjoy talking to Charlie because she's an intelligent, creative person that I like talking about motherhood and creativity and music, career with, but I think Charlie offers a very cool, unique perspective because she has kind of pivoted uh to a slightly different career in music. And so we will talk about that. We will get to it. And by the way, Charlie, I forgot to tell you this before we started recording, but I've completely I've read your bio to introduce you. So everybody knows all the wonderful things you are doing in the world. Um good. Yes, exactly. We don't have to like read your whole bio with you here because I know that can be awkward. But um, the first question I always love to like ask is first kind of give us a give us a setting. You have how many children? And are you a solo parent? Do you parent with a partner? What is your what is your setup, your parenting setup look like?

SPEAKER_01 3:35

I have one child. I have a six-year-old daughter named Edie. Um, and uh her dad and I are not together. So I I am the primary parent, which means she's with me most of the time during the week. And then she's with her dad every Thursday night and every first, third, and fifth weekend, you know. And he's he's a responsible, reliable guy. So when she's with him, I'm kind of off parenting duty from the most part. When she's with me, it's me 24-7. Okay. So, you know, that's uh full on.

SPEAKER_03 4:17

Yeah, it's like either all or nothing.

SPEAKER_01 4:19

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 4:21

Um, okay. And my second question to always begin these podcasts is did you know you all always wanted to be, did you always want to be a mother? Like what was your journey to motherhood like? And you can share as little or as much as you want on this subject.

SPEAKER_01 4:36

I mean, I would say kind of, I I always knew that I wanted to be a parental figure of some sort, you know, and um for a long time I was partnered with somebody who already had kids, and um, and I didn't imagine uh having more kids with him. So I thought maybe I would just be a step parent and I would have been fine with that. I didn't feel like I needed to have my own kid, I just kind of wanted to be um, you know, in a supportive role in a child's life. But yeah, I think yeah, so not necessarily, but but I think I was kind of leaned in the direction of thinking that I would do it at some point. Then of course, like I I got into my um my 30s and then started putting it off by two years and off by maybe in two years, maybe in two years. So the maybe, maybe, maybe, yes. I put it off as long as I could.

SPEAKER_03 5:41

Yeah, same, same. I hear you. Yeah, we were off doing all kinds of things, and Charlie was doing a lot of different things. You had, I mean, you started off singer-songwriter, Charlie Fay. You had this incredible album you put out, Travels with Charlie, where you would spend, was it one month in different towns in a different town, right? Kind of digging into the music scene there, the local music scene, collaborating, uh, performing shows, songwriting, is that right?

SPEAKER_01 6:09

Yeah, it was yeah. I I I had done a good amount of traditional touring, and I felt like people would always ask me, like, oh, what was you know uh Asheville like? And I was like, I don't know. I just drove in, I played a show, I left, you know, and so I I had this thought that if I could spend a full month, you know, in a handful of different cities and do a residency, that I could actually get to see the country that way. And I it would also give me time to develop an audience in each place because at that point I I didn't really have a national audience. So um I spent a month in Tucson, a month in LA, uh, Portland, Boulder, Shreveport, um Asheville, Nashville, a wait in Milwaukee was one of them. Wow. And New York. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 7:09

I remember like just being so envious of you when you were doing this. I was like, she's living the dream. Like, that is it was just so it was very, it was a very cool idea because I also agree that like when you're a touring artist, you know, it kind of sucks. You don't really get to spend any time in the town that you're uh digging into. You get a little glimpse of it, and you're like, what would it be like to actually like be here and be a part of the scene and dig into the culture and the you know, meet people?

SPEAKER_01 7:37

So it was a really, a really great life experience. And also through that, I I met a lot of musicians in each of these cities. And then I after that, I was able to tour solo and have these local bands. Like I had a band in Tucson who I had already played with and recorded a song with and you know, you built yourself some infrastructure in like multiple cities, which is pretty brilliant.

SPEAKER_03 8:04

Clever, clever. Well, okay. Fast forward a few years, I don't know how many years, but you started feeling the call to kind of put together this amazing girl group, the Fayettes, uh, to do kind of a Motown sound that had always been calling to you. And that was probably your last, was that like your last? That was like your last musical project before we will talk about your kids album as well.

SPEAKER_01 8:28

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was I did Charlie Faye and the Fayettes for I did two albums. Um, and that was I I had more success with that project than I had as a singer-songwriter. I think because it was it was so specific. Um, and I loved writing songs in that style. And just so you know, like that kind of music, like 60s soul pop, like that's the kind of music that I've loved since I was a kid. Because when I was, I think like eight years old or something, I watched Dirty Dancing. And there was a lot that went over my head, but um, but I loved the music. And so like that dirty dancing soundtrack introduced me to Otis Redding and the Ronettes and the Sherelles and like the Drifters, like all Solomon Burke, all these great um acts from that time. And right, so I so I always wanted to do something like that. And then at a certain point, I think I got a little bored of my own singer-songwriter show. Um, and I wanted to do something that was like more entertaining for me and for the audience, and so I thought, what if I did like kind of a throwback girl group type thing? And I and I asked um Betty Sue and Akina Adderley if they wanted to be a part of it and they were excited about it, and they're just the best. So it was it was a joy to work with them.

SPEAKER_03 10:00

Yeah, that was such a fun, a fun little you know, era for you. I loved you did it so well. You had a great band, you had great songs. Um, yeah, you should definitely go check out Charlie Faye and the Fayettez. Yeah, her albums are are everywhere. And and then, okay, so how what was the timeline between like your last like Fayettez album, perhaps pandemic? I can't remember.

SPEAKER_01 10:25

Was Edie born post or post-pandemic or no, before that's right, four months before the pandemic. So like I I had put out a record, I think I released a record um like right around the time I got pregnant with Edie. It's okay. Right, no, yeah, that'll make sense. Yeah. And uh and then um she was born in November, and then I was like, okay, I'm gonna have my kind of first performance comeback at South by Southwest. You know, by then she'll be four months old and I'll be able to do stuff again. And and then of course COVID hit and South by was canceled, and you know, and then I spent a year plus just at home with my baby.

SPEAKER_03 11:23

Right. Little Baby ED. Yep, I remember. And then you decided to dive into the world of children's music, and you made an awesome, awesome uh record with one of my favorite songs of all time that I got to co-write with you, Snack Time. Oh, yeah, snack time. Um, yes, talk about that album and what like did you all so you kind of had a history before even having a kid of being in kids' music, correct?

SPEAKER_01 11:53

That is true. Yeah. I didn't I don't know if I if I thought I'd ever go back to it. But yeah, um, when I was much younger, I toured with this guy, Dan Zanes, who um has had a great career in um making family music. Um I played in his band, and it was like the first kind of high-level touring experience I ever had. Like we did fly dates and played in nice theaters, and because they were shows for families, we would play like an 11 a.m. and a 1 p.m. And then we would like all go out to dinner and be in bed by 10 o'clock. Um the dream, the literal dream. Pretty much, yeah. Um, so yes, I had done kids' music before, but at that point, I was more of a side person and I wasn't really yeah, and I I also didn't have a kid, so I don't think I would have like continued on that path at that time. But once I had Edie, and especially once I was just like stuck in the house during the pandemic with this little kid, um I started writing songs more like for her. Right. Um, initially not with the intention of making a record, but just because I was like making up little songs for her about things that she liked or about things that, you know, I was like, oh, this is how she can remember the days of the week or whatever. Right. Um and then at a certain point I got inspired to make a whole record of that stuff and make it kind of like in the same style as the Fayette's record, that 60s soul pop kind of Motown vibe. Um, and I'm really proud of the record. I I think there's some great songwriting on there. The you know, I did not cut any corners with uh musicians or you hired the best of the best, Charlie Payne, the Fanimals.

SPEAKER_03 13:53

It's you have to, if you're listening to this and you have kids and you need some like new good kids music in your world, trust me, it's like it's it's like palatable music. So much kids' music is like makes you want to, you know, scream. Um, because it's not great.

SPEAKER_01 14:09

Being in the kids' music um, you know, world, I realized there's actually a lot of great stuff.

SPEAKER_03 14:16

There is, there is. I should I should not say there isn't. It's just I think a lot of the stuff that gets pushed out, like yeah, whatever.

SPEAKER_01 14:24

There's a lot of really annoying stuff. Yeah, it's a lot of annoying. Yeah, it's it's totally the same as in in popular music, right? You know, what's true? What is popular music or what is like popular um television for adults, like you know, crappy reality TV that's the equivalent of like the annoying kids song that gets them hooked, you know, that there are people who are aiming for the lowest common denominator and and they know it'll work, you know. Yeah, good good for them. I hope they're using the money for something good.

SPEAKER_03 14:59

Totally, exactly, exactly, right. Um, yeah, but no, there's so many great, great songs on your album. And it like I feel I I love that you approach different um concepts too, and you know, like Milo wears a tutu about a little boy who just wants to wear a tutu, and what's so crazy about that? And of course, there's the seven days of fun and me and my family about all the different types of families there are. So you're also really good. You were great at addressing multiple, you know, concepts and things that different kids go through and feel and such. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:32

Yeah, yeah. And it's I'm I'm proud of the record. I think um, oh, you said, you know, if you're listening, and I was like, I wonder, so who is listening? Like that's one of my questions for you. Who is listening? Because I assume it is uh our our peers, mothers in music.

SPEAKER_03 15:51

It's yeah, it's a lot of our peers. And then I've also noticed occasionally fans of ours who kind of just want like this sort of glimpse behind the mirror of like who we are as moms, not just musicians um and such, but mostly I would say probably 90% of listeners are peers of ours, mom musicians and such.

SPEAKER_01 16:11

Yeah, it's funny because I was like, okay, how do I prepare myself for this podcast interview? And then I was like, wait a minute, I'm not promoting anything. No, this is this is a motherhood promotion. I'm just kidding. But but are we promoting it?

SPEAKER_03 16:26

I don't know. That that is left up to the listener when what they take away.

SPEAKER_01 16:29

Do they really want to do this?

SPEAKER_03 16:31

I don't know. We'll see.

SPEAKER_01 16:33

People are listening trying to make a decision, or I've I feel like most people listening probably already are. They probably already are.

SPEAKER_03 16:41

My intention with this podcast, Charlie, was to like give mothers uh like like myself, who when I first became a mom, when I found out I was gonna be pregnant, when I found out I was pregnant, not going to be pregnant, um, I was freaking out because I couldn't find many um illustrations around me of kind of like regular mid-level career folk uh who were having babies. Yes, there was Erica Badu and Ani DeFranco and Lucy. That's a whole different thing. Yeah. When you've already had a career, you're established, whatever, you have the money, you have the infrastructure, you have the nannies and such. Um, the support system. I was kind of looking for examples of moms who were just kind of like, you know, everyday musicians, workers in the industry who are are who were having to navigate this, especially myself. It was not planned. It was kind of an accident. So I was like, whoa, what is this gonna look like? And it really rocked my world. And there were all these perceptions that I found thrown at me. You know, the story of like my manager who was like, okay, never mind. Um, and also I think have you told that story on this podcast? Uh yes, I think I told it in the first and second. So I try not to overtell it. Uh, but you know, basically I had a manager who once they found out I was pregnant was like, okay, this, you know, you're probably just gonna not do your music anymore and just be a mom. And and and really made me feel like total shit uh for wanting this.

SPEAKER_01 18:10

I mean, everybody's energy is different. First of all, some people can handle a lot more than other people. And also some babies can handle things that other babies can't.

SPEAKER_03 18:18

So hundred percent. Well, when I spoke to Raina, we talked about this because I asked her, I always ask, like, okay, what did once you had the baby, what did life suddenly look like? Were you completely doing, and I'll ask you this too, were you doing the same exact thing? I guess you kind of already touched on it. You were just at home with baby, but like Raina tried to like make it work and she went out and toured a ton. You know, of course, Andrew, her, her partner, her her baby's father is also like in her band. So they went out on the road with baby. Yeah. And then about like a year or maybe not even into it, she was like, This is awful. Like, like, you know, my child is like in places that are so dangerous that like I can't expect this house concert I'm playing with all these like glass things in a case to be, you know, and my toddlers like running around. So like she kind of had this aha moment of like, okay, this isn't working. I gotta pivot, you know. And like, oh my God, if I could go back and interview myself when I was and like my dreams and aspirations, because I kind of tried to do it. I took Lulu to France when she was two months old.

SPEAKER_01 19:19

Like I mean, you're one of those people who I I do feel like you have so much energy and like you're you're able to do a lot of things and you know I do, but yes, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 19:31

It's not, it's like looking back, it was just kind of silly. I mean, if I was always gonna do it, there was no one who could stop me, but like I was so sleep deprived. And I mean, I like there's no way I could do it now, you know. I was 34, 35, so I still had mid-30s energy.

SPEAKER_01 19:49

Right, right. I feel like when I see people who have a really good support system, like great partner, you know, grandparents around, all of that, right? It makes a world of difference, you know. And I feel like that's that's kind of where I struggle, is that I don't have as much of a support system. So, you know, other than other than the weekends that you know, my kid is with her dad when I'm able to go off and travel and stuff, right? You know, other than every other weekend, I'm kind of I'm just responsible all the time. You know, exactly.

SPEAKER_03 20:24

It's a very different everybody has such a different situation. And yeah, support system is like defines so much of your experience of motherhood. Um, but let's talk about so okay, we've kind of covered the gist of your music career, making music as a musician. You now are a music manager, you're on you're in the business side of things. You work for traffic, you are part of traffic. Um is it it's not traffic, what is it called? Traffic.

SPEAKER_01 20:52

I mean, uh traffic music group is kind of the umbrella. Yeah. So that that encompasses our, you know, our management, label, uh, and publishing. Right. Um, but but I'm primarily, you know, I'm I'm an artist manager.

SPEAKER_03 21:07

That's what I might. Yeah, exactly. And she's great at it. And I will ask you now to tell us about what was the journey like to that. When did you have the realization that you might want to actually be on the other side of things and that you might be good at it and what turned you on about it? Just give us a little insight into that because I think it's really cool.

SPEAKER_01 21:28

Sure. I mean, I I always enjoyed that side of things, even when I was an artist, which made me kind of a weird artist. Yeah, you know, because most artists um dislike networking, right? Well, to me, it's just like meeting people and like building relationships, which I love. It's kind of my favorite thing is like meeting new people and getting to know them and connecting over common interests or common projects, you know. So that's always been fun for me. Um, and then I I guess it was when I was still primarily an artist, um, you know, artist friends of mine started reaching out to me and saying, hey, it looks like you really did a good job, you know, releasing your own record. Can I take you out to coffee and pick your brain about how you did this? And so I was, I was just kind of sitting down with people and you know, giving advice, whatever I had done or whatever I'd, you know, information I'd gathered, I was passing on. Um and then uh at a certain point, people who weren't my friends started asking for my advice. Yeah. And I was like, hmm, well, you know, I I I can, I don't really, you know, I have no need to go have coffee with you. Like it's not what I need to do with an hour of my day. But if you want me to sit down with you and help you make a plan and figure out how to put together a team for a release, then you know, we'll do it as a consulting session. And sure. Um, so I started doing some of that while I was still doing Charlie Faye and the Fayette. Um and then, you know, I I had a baby, and then four months later the pandemic hit, and I was like, well, it doesn't look like I'm going out performing as an artist at this point. So I started thinking about maybe making consulting more of a focus because I was like, well, it's a way to kind of stay in the music community. Um, I also thought about going back to school and becoming a therapist, you know, but yeah, um, I was like, I kind of want to stay in music, these are my people. So um I was doing a little more consulting. Um, and my friend Adrian Lake had also started doing consulting during the pandemic um because she was working for South by Southwest. And then, of course, when uh South by got canceled that year, there were a bunch of layoffs.

SPEAKER_03 24:12

Right.

SPEAKER_01 24:13

And um, and so she started doing a lot of consulting on her own. And I suggested that we team up and create an agency that was like consulting and PR, which she still does and is the best. Um yeah, she's great. So we started Daydream Believer Creative, which is a consulting and PR agency. Um, and I was doing a lot of that. So I was doing consulting, I was also doing locally focused PR, which I learned a lot uh doing that, and I no longer do that, you know. Adrian's she's got it, you know. Right. And now I bring my artists to her to work with her. And at the same time, you know, I I had known Kevin Womack for years, like since my early days in Austin. Um, and he was always really um like generous with his time with me, you know, would sit down and give me advice, whatever, you know, and um and around the same time that I started the business with Adrian, Kevin also reached out to me and he was like, hey, I could use some help at traffic, like, you know, I could really use somebody like you on my team. And I was like, cool, great, you know, let's let's try working together on some projects and see how it goes. And so we did. And then um eventually um we ended up co-managing one artist together, somebody someone. Um, and then uh maybe six months after that, we had Lou Apollo walk into the office and kind of pitch us on managing him. And even though both of us ahead of time had been like, we're not taking anything on, we were like, okay, okay, we're taking him on. Yeah, totally, exactly. Sometimes that just happens. Like we we all feel so we're all so busy and so full up. But when you're really inspired, you know, not just by the music, but also by the person, um, you know, and what the working relationship is gonna feel like, um, then you kind of go, all right, fine. Like let's let's make an exception. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Um so yeah, we we now manage um somebody someone, Lou Apollo, um Quentin, uh Judy Blank, and Dylan LeBlanc all together. Um, Kevin also manages John Mook and Los Lonely Boys, and I also manage Betty Sue on my own. Okay, awesome.

SPEAKER_03 26:58

All super talented artists. Go check them out if you're if you don't know of them, if you're our friends, you probably do. Um okay, so yes, it has been so cool to see you transition to this line of work because you are so good at it. I mean, I myself am one of the people who took you up on the consulting thing. And when I was about to release my album a couple of years ago, Bird by Bird, you were instrumental in helping me and you helped, you know, get PR for it. Um Charlie is really, really fabulous at helping you think something through and think through, you know, kind of your goals with an album and what you're what you're looking to do with it. And um, you just have that that that mind, that gift and knack for it. And I think because you have been a musician and an artist, and on the other side, you're able to understand a lot of the a lot of and empathize with a lot of the things that we go through as artists, right? Um you're really good at kind of walking through and and relating to artists in ways that sometimes people, business folk who have not, you know, been artists don't always get, you know. So I think that's a magical part of of what you do.

SPEAKER_01 28:08

Yeah, I mean, it's my favorite part is I mean, there's a reason I was like, I'm not gonna go back to school. I'm staying in music because I love working with artists and musicians because they're my people. You know? Yeah, exactly. Um, and it also feels nice to like not just be working in parallel to artists, but be able to be a part of um the support system, you know.

SPEAKER_03 28:36

Right, exactly, exactly. Because God knows we need we need it. Um well, yeah, and you have some very unique artists, like all those artists are very, very different from each other. And so they probably all require very different things, you know. So um it must be fun to be able to instead of just like I think about this sometimes with your world, you know, versus although I don't know lately I've been like getting myself involved in three million projects, too many, but with lately, lately I know, I know, I know. Well, I I feel like yeah, I kind of manifested that. But um, but you get to it's like instead of just being like Charlie Faye in my world of Charlie Faye music, it's like you get to now be a part of like somebody, someone who has their very interesting world of music. And, you know, Quentin and Lou Apollo, all these different artists, John Mook, who all are kind of operating in slightly different genres and and worlds. And it must be really, I guess it I'm just saying, like you have a very diverse world of music now, you know, that you're surrounded by.

SPEAKER_01 29:40

So yeah. I do, I do, and and also I don't really, because I it all it all kind of lives, you know, at least somewhat near the singer-songwriter, Americana, you know, some of it goes a little more pop, some of it, yeah, you know, but it's still about um songs, right? Right. Um mostly and a lot of organic sounds too.

SPEAKER_03 30:10

Yeah. So let me ask you, now that you've been doing this a few years, do you miss being like a musicianslash artist at all? Like, do you do you miss the stage? Do you miss performing? I know you occasionally get to perform, usually at school functions, like I which because of you know your kids' album, it was just like perfect and for all these, you know, different kids' events. Um, but do you miss, do you miss that part of your life?

SPEAKER_01 30:36

No, which I know seems weird, you know. Um and and peep I think people assume that I do. And people like sometimes are I I think come to me with the assumption that like I gave something up, like that I really compromised or something, but no. But that is not the case. I loved my life as an artist and all the things that it allowed me to do in my life, like lot, like that amazing tour where I lived in the city each month, you know. But um, but no, I don't I don't miss being in that position. There are a lot of things I don't miss about like the stress of like your voice always having to be good, like, oh if you're getting a cold, like, oh no, you know, I can like now I can just have a cold and it's not that big deal. Um that's amazing. I'm I'm jealous we as as you know musician mothers all know that like you're gonna be getting a lot of colds. And if you're a singer, yeah, like you're anyway. I'm glad to not have that pressure because you know, I I would stress out a lot more about it. Um, and also um I I'm just glad not to have the stress of gigs or to have to stay up late at night and like figure out child care, like how who's gonna take care of my kid? When you know, do I have to hire a babysitter? I'll probably pay more for the babysitter than I'll make on the gig. Right. There is that. Yep. Um and yeah, I also don't miss like having people take pictures of me on stage, you know.

SPEAKER_03 32:13

Yeah, yeah. Um definitely gets harder as we get older and I'm like in control.

SPEAKER_01 32:18

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 32:19

You were totally in control, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:22

So yeah, you get to kind of have a different identity, yeah. So yeah, no, I don't miss it. However, you know, um I do still really enjoy um being asked to perform the kids' music stuff because it gives me an opportunity to get on stage with my kid. Right. Um because she loves being on stage. And I'm so glad I did this kids' music project because, like, through that, like she learned these songs. And through I also I started this um family music event series in partnership with K U T X called The Breakfast Boogie. And through the Breakfast Boogie, Edie got very comfortable being on stage, you know, to where like she would start jumping up there with anybody. Yeah, there's a little ramp at the far-out lounge. Um, there's a little ramp to like the small outdoor stage, right? You know, and if I wasn't holding on to her, she like at like three years old or whatever, she'd just run up the ramp and like run on stage with whoever was up there, like just to be up there, like I belong here, right? You know, so yeah, she's she's a born performer, and um, I'm so glad that I have this particular project, which lets me give her the opportunity to be on stage. Um, so we have a lot of fun whenever we get to do a gig together, and I would love to keep doing that like a few times a year.

SPEAKER_03 33:56

Yeah, I think that's a really like perfect way to keep playing your music, you know, because it forms such a great bond and connection with your kid, you know, who obviously has the performer, the performer gene.

unknown 34:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 34:09

Oh man, yeah. So Edie and my daughter Izzy were born the same year. So Charlie and I have had like, you know, some um, some great kind of combination toddler years together with the with the girls. And uh Edie is definitely a performer in a way that my my children are not. And it's so fun seeing Edie. It's just like, wow, that's what it looks like, you know, when your kid is just like naturally drawn to the stage.

SPEAKER_01 34:37

Um yeah, I mean, and it's she also sings constantly, like she sings like anything she's acting out at home, she's singing it, you know, and even at school, like she had to be asked like not to be constantly in the classroom.

SPEAKER_03 34:54

Right. Would you please save that for the playground, Edie? Yeah, that's yeah outside. I need to get her in musical theater. I think that's gonna be her jam because that's where you sing everything, right? It's like, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 35:07

I am really excited because this summer I've just been waiting until she's old enough to do something like this, you know, because she also she's not really a rule follower, which yeah, yeah, that's okay. We need some of those in the world. But like she's getting old enough now that she can work within a structure of rules. Um and she's finally old enough to do one of the Adderley School camps, which is Akina's family's um like musical theater school. So she's gonna do the wicked camp this summer. Oh my god. Yeah. And I I'm just so excited for her.

SPEAKER_03 35:42

Oh, she's gonna, she's gonna love that. Um, the question is, who will she play? Right?

SPEAKER_01 35:49

Which role will she get? She's comfortable with both Glinda and Alpha as long as she gets one of the lead roles.

SPEAKER_03 35:56

I was gonna say, you know, there's that too. It's like Okay, okay, preparation for if you don't get the lead role. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 36:03

How do they do that with like six-year-olds?

SPEAKER_03 36:06

I don't, I don't either, but uh something tells me that Edie will be vying for you know, top dog just because she's such a natural boy. There, a lot of the kids that go go in those things, sometimes they're not as naturally keen to perform. They just sort of are interested in it and intrigued, but maybe not like, you know, um seeking the spotlight per se. So uh it's it's yeah, yeah. You you kind of know, I think, as the teacher, like which ones are gonna really relish the the spotlight and which ones don't. So she's definitely one of those, but I love it. She's so fun. Her personality is it's just fun to watch develop, like all of our children and see like what parts of us they get and what parts they don't. And um, would you want her to do music like as a career? Like what are your wishes? I mean, I know you're very laid back and very supportive of her in general.

SPEAKER_01 36:55

So yeah, she can do whatever it's it's who knows what she'll do, you know, and something that she's into in her childhood or teen years may not be what she does as an older person, you know. So she's so young, yeah. I think just because she loves singing so much, you know, that she she should be singing, you know. Um so I'll just I'll encourage her in in that direction because it's what she's into, you know. Right. Um, and like, but I mean, whatever she's into, I'll encourage her to do. Like recently she expressed an interest in soccer, which kind of came out of nowhere after her saying she hated soccer. And I was like, okay, cool. Well, like, let's look up soccer stuff for next semester, you know.

SPEAKER_03 37:45

Yeah, these kids, they're always they're always getting into stuff which is exciting and also like, oh my gosh, more activities. It's a lot to navigate, which leads me to my next question about like time and urgency and all this. You now you have you have a slightly different experience maybe of motherhood as a as a solo parent who co-works with someone else, because you do get this intense, um, you know, obviously all in motherhood where you are just like you're her only caretaker for several days and it's just probably all about her, and you have to work uh when she's at school, correct? You know, you just have to like really go hard with blocking your time and probably um treating your time very which by the way, thank you for taking time to do this because I know your time is precious. Um, but with Thursday, it's I know, I know, but they don't have school tomorrow. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 38:40

Yeah, but it's also the first the first weekend of the month. Yes, okay. So you're golden, you're off. Yeah, I mean, it's time my times that uh basically during the week, I am just trying to fit everything in. So my work day goes from like I'm home by like 8:30. If I go to the gym, then like I'm home and at my desk by nine. And I'm trying to go to the gym. Good for you. I am trying because I am like I need to be stronger.

SPEAKER_03 39:14

You need to get the muscles as as we all do as we get older. I know.

SPEAKER_01 39:19

I'm like, I'm my body is so weak, and then I end up I kick the soccer ball with Edie, and I'm like, ooh, my angle. Like I know, I know we gotta be strong. But uh yeah, so um I'm at my desk by 8:30 or nine, and then you know, my workday ends at 2 45 when I have to leave to pick her up, and that's really hard. And it doesn't actually end because of course of course it's for some reason, three o'clock is when everybody wants to email and call and text, like three o'clock, exactly three o'clock. There's always this influx, and I'm just like, why now? Because I don't, it's really hard for me to divide my attention. You know, my kid is still at an age and personality where she just she requires a lot of my attention, you know, and I realize everybody's different with this, and some people are like, you're gonna have to learn how to like take calls while you're with your kid. And I'm like, yeah, it's just not, it's gonna look unprofessional, you know. So I'm just not gonna try to do that um at this stage. Um, but another kid, it might be totally fine. Um anyway, yeah, during the week, uh, it's tough. You know, Thursdays are are she's with her dad. Her dad picks her up from school and she spends the night with her dad on Thursday nights. So Thursdays are my long work day and I relish them. I will work until eight o'clock at night and I will be like I will be on a high from like how many things I've gotten done. And like it feels so good. Um, so that's like the one longer day I have. And then um every other weekend basically she's with her dad. So on weekends, I'm able to travel, which is great. Like I can go to one of my artists' shows in LA or in Nashville or New York, you know, if the timing works out. Um and and I love I love having that freedom and like not having to feel like I'm leaving my kid when I could be with her because it's not an option, right? You know. Um, it's like she's with her dad, she's doing something else, she's otherwise occupied. So I should go out and do something too. Um so I I love that part. Um, but the part where I'm solo parenting 24-7, which is like every other weekend and basically all the time during the week, is really hard. You know, if I want to go out to a show at night, and and so much uh, so much of our like relationship building and relationship maintenance like in the music community happens through going out at night. And I see like you're still able to like play at night and go out at night because you have a supportive partner who will stay home with the kids. And I don't have that, and I really can't, I can't get a babysitter for E like more than like one night a week, if even that, it just feels like too much, you know.

SPEAKER_03 42:35

Yeah, no, I know.

SPEAKER_01 42:36

Um so it's it's tough. It's tough. Yep.

SPEAKER_03 42:41

Yeah, I know, girl. It's it's tough both ways. It's funny because I was reflecting the I've been kind of feeling just super guilty lately because I've missed so many bedtimes lately. Like it's like when I miss like multiple bed times, uh like bed put downs, you know, over the week. It starts to kind of get to you as at least myself, because it's just like it is like a very sweet time where I mean it's crazy time too. Sometimes I'm like, oh my God, just go to sleep. But oftentimes, every parent knows it's the time where your kid just sort of like starts to reveal all this information about themselves and they're they'll talk about something that happened at school or like totally it's like emotional unraveling right before bedtime, you know? Yes. And so I hate it when I miss too many of those. And I try to limit them to just like, you know, yeah, I miss like two or three a week. That's fine. But lately it's been like five, and I'm like, oh my God, I am the worst mom. It's temporary. I'm going through just this crazy weird chunk of like just a lot. Uh in this time of year, as you know, it's just insane south by south west of approaching. Gigs just get crazy. There's so much happening. Um, and I'm really lucky because I do have an amazing partner who does not like going out as much as I do. He's more of an introvert and he will happily stay home with the children while I go out. But it's for me, it's My struggle is like my own internal guilt, you know?

SPEAKER_01 44:03

And I'm wondering about that. Like, does it does it come from that kind of the shoulding? You know, the a little bit of should be there or or do the girls get bummed out when you're not? The girls get bummed out.

SPEAKER_03 44:19

It's it's the teensiest bit of should, but that's actually not as present as the like, you know, when the like when I haven't told them that I have a gig that I'm going to that night. And they're like, Mama, do you have a gig tonight? And I'm like, Yes, I do actually. And they're like, what? You had one last night, you know? And it's like, they get there, and I know that this time is so precious within this window because eventually they're not gonna care at all that I'm gone. You know, Lulu's like right on the edge of that probably because she's 10, about to be 11. But she still really loves me being, you know, at her bedside when she's going to bed. And so anyway, it's it's that's the struggle for me as a musician who often works at night or has to go do things at night. Um, so I I totally get what you're saying about, you know, yeah, just not being gone so much at night, you know, and doing as much as you can during the day.

SPEAKER_01 45:10

Yeah, I feel like I mean, for for what it's worth, like you are so present for your kids, you know. And um, and I feel like them remembering you, like going out and having gigs, like is gonna be kind of a cool thing too. Because like I hope, I hope, yeah. It it is because they see you as like having a life and having a cool job, like you know, um, I don't know. The other thing you were making me think of is like a a dude would not think oh twice about being out a couple nights a week for gigs. Like this, no, it was gone for months, you know, and be like, sorry, it's just my job, you know, and and it just uh there's another there's a big reason this podcast is not called Another Father, okay, Charlie Faye.

SPEAKER_03 46:05

There's nothing to talk about with the dudes.

SPEAKER_01 46:06

I'm not saying there's nothing, but maybe we can like harass them about maybe we should maybe we should should them.

SPEAKER_03 46:12

I thought it would be funny to occasionally have like a guest dad on, like one of my and be like, tell me about your typical week in in music and career. So do you feel guilty? Yeah, yeah. Well, and that's what I told the girls. I'm like, you never give your dad a hard time when he leaves to go do his job, right? And you're always giving me a hard time and it makes me feel like crap, you know? And they're like, but I obviously know the answer to that is that they it's not that they like me more, but they're just it's a different relationship.

SPEAKER_01 46:41

It's a different kind of attachment.

SPEAKER_03 46:43

It's a different type of attachment. They can kind of open up to me more emotionally than him. He's working on that and he's very sweet and soft with them. But it's just, I was the same way with my mom and dad. I've to this day, I tell my mom more than my dad. It's just, it's just, I think, something, and maybe with I don't know if it's just with daughters, but um anyway, that's a whole other podcast, another daughter. But um but I I on that note, this is kind of the perfect segue, I wanted to ask, like what um, you know, the differences between you and your ex-partner, what were like when you first got pregnant, did you have what what were what am I trying to say here? Um, what were the responses from like your professional community and peers? Did you feel this like, oh gosh, like I have to hide it or I, you know, any not shame, but you know what I mean? This sort of like, how is this going to affect my career and how I look versus your your now ex-partner, you know, because he's a musician as well, and so he was in the music business or is in the music business. And so talk about some of those things, those those myths and those um things that might have been put on you. Maybe they weren't at all.

SPEAKER_01 47:54

Maybe you had a really good I I don't think I experienced a lot of that. One, like I didn't um, I didn't have a team who was earning a commission off of me. And I think that's the difference between like where I was at and where you were at was like having a manager, and I know this as a manager, is like your manager makes money when you make money. Yeah, and I didn't have anybody like that who was depending on me to make a living. Um yeah, that does make a difference. Yeah, so nobody there wasn't anyone who was like bothered by it. Um and uh yeah, I I think interestingly, in in our case, like I don't know, there are there are a lot of variables here. Like we didn't live in the same place, you know. So my daughter's dad was living in LA and I was living in Austin when I got pregnant and through the pregnancy.

SPEAKER_03 48:51

You know, I didn't even I don't even remember that. Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_01 48:55

Oh yeah, yeah, okay. And like I was just here. And by the way, I know you know this, but just for everybody else, I'd had three miscarriages before this fourth pregnancy that ended up being ED. Right.

SPEAKER_03 49:14

Um I remember that.

SPEAKER_01 49:15

And so like I was on my own through a lot of that. Um and you know, but what's interesting is in the end, I think because um because I was based in Austin, like it was when I was eight months pregnant, he finally moved to Austin, you know, to be here for the baby when the baby came. And um, and then four months later the pandemic hit, you know, and then less than a year later we were getting divorced. Right. So, you know, it just it ended up it ended up affecting his career as much as mine. Right um because we are no longer partnered, um, and because he is, you know, um a participatory father. Yeah, so you know, he he left behind um a lot of his career in LA as a session musician and moved to Austin, you know, to be where his kid is. And um, and I really respect that because there are dudes who would not. Nope. Um, and then you know, for me, of course, I I was not gonna be out there performing on on the same level, but that was my choice. Like there was the pandemic, but then I chose to continue in this direction, you know, managing artists because it was what I was passionate about. Um so you know, it it changed both of our career paths. And I don't know what we thought beforehand was gonna happen. I think he probably thought he would just continue on doing what he was doing. And had we stayed partnered, that probably would have been the case, right?

SPEAKER_03 51:17

Right, right.

SPEAKER_01 51:18

Um I don't know what I thought was gonna happen. I probably thought that I was gonna keep doing stuff too, and maybe just tour less, you know, and money off of sinks or whatever, you know. I don't know what I thought, you know, but it's all very messy.

SPEAKER_03 51:35

It's like it's we have all these concepts and these ideas. And the truth is that like none of us really know what it's gonna be like until we're in it, you know? And and it it affects things, it affects our relationships with our partners so much as you, you know, we've all found out, right? It's like, and and evolves that into something else and our community and our careers. Um yeah, but you, Charlie, have have like really I've watched you and I've just been so in awe of how you have navigated it so gracefully. Um, a lot of challenges, you know, that you dealt with that some of us didn't, you know. Uh and I mean we all have different, different struggles and challenges that we do deal with getting to this point in life and to motherhood and through motherhood. But you are so great at you have a wonderful friend network that you're very, very loyal to. And I think that, you know, you're great at finding ways to to to figure, you're just great at figuring things out, you know. That's kind of what you do as a as a music, um, as an artist manager, you know, you're always trying to like piece together the puzzle of what will be the best case scenario and what to do next. And I think that that really translates to how you how you move through motherhood, you know?

SPEAKER_01 52:49

Yeah. Thank you for saying that. I mean, there's a lot I'm still trying to figure out. And I mean support system is a big one, you know. And um I I still, I still have not cracked the code, you know. Um yeah.

SPEAKER_03 53:06

Yeah, I mean, it's it's it's very tricky. And it'll shift and change as Edie gets older, obviously. You know, she'll get to an age where she doesn't need as much, you know, of you and stay at home by herself. Or like, you know, all these little things that actually become big things and how they change your life and your, you know, rituals and all that. So um, and she'll have a social life, be having sleepovers. That will be the game changer I have found.

SPEAKER_01 53:32

Sleepovers, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 53:33

They're able to go have a sleepover. It's like, ooh, it's kind of like a free babysitter. Amazing. The only thing is, I'm really bad at reciprocating with my friends because I always have gigs. So um, I'm trying to get better about like looking ahead and being like, okay, now when can I have your child over? So yeah. Luckily, there seems to be this really beautiful dynamic between moms where it's like, I think certain moms just get it, like they don't have the lifestyle I have, and they're happy to be at home with the kids and do fun things with them while I'm out working at night, you know? And then I'll help support in other ways however I can.

SPEAKER_01 54:10

So yeah, I think I mean we and we have to kind of look at um what everybody's situation is and and what we're able to like offer our our friends in our community. And and I mean, like I was thinking like on um on Valentine's Day, like I just had Edie and I was like, oh, I should, I didn't end up doing this. I just went on a Valentine's date with Edie. But I was like, oh, I should volunteer to like take other people's kids so that like that partnered people can like go on a Valentine's date because you know, I'm I'm just with Edie and like I could have a bunch of girls over. Maybe next year I'll do that.

SPEAKER_03 54:48

But you know, there's really sweet, but you also don't have to also save everybody, you know. Uh there's that thing too of like take care of yourself and first. But if it helps you, sometimes it helps you out to have kids with you to, you know what I mean? It's way more fun to have to have a friend over for it can actually be like mutually beneficial in that in that sense. So mamas helping mamas. Um, well, I don't want to take too much more of your time. I think I'll end with I usually end with talk about like a typical week or day, but you kind of did that, which was beautiful. You sort of organically worked that in because your schedule is so unique because of the the custody and the the the shared custody and the um co-parenting dynamic you have. It's like you get into these big stages of flow, and then you know, you're kind of limited between, you know, 8:30 and and 245, and you're really great at, you know, treating that time as uh special and important. But what I was what I also like to ask is like, what are you what are you working on right now that you are most excited about? Um, yeah, what's like what's the next thing coming up for you that you're focused on or there that's lighting you up?

SPEAKER_01 56:00

I mean, South by Southwest starts next week. So, you know, I'm just like coordinating all of our artists' schedules and um I'm excited to see everybody play. And for me, I I know people are like South by's over, whatever. I I don't think so. Like a bunch of people are still coming to town. Oh, totally. So I'll get to like, I'll get to see all like my, you know, my publishing friends from New York and like just friends from all over the country in the industry who come into town for South by. Right. Um, and then reunion, family reunion. It's like a reunion, and then just the energy of like, you know, um like somebody like Lou Apollo playing like five gigs in a week, and you know, like by the end of that week the band is gonna be like super tight. Like, you know.

SPEAKER_03 56:52

Oh, oh, super.

SPEAKER_01 56:53

I was like exhausted, like super tight. Yes, yes, both. I love it. I love it. Both, yeah, both. Um, but yeah, I mean, I yeah, I love South by Week. It's so fun.

SPEAKER_03 57:05

Um, it's like heightened music experience, you know, with friends. It's it's the time of year where like I always run into people who I haven't seen in forever or meet someone really interesting who I then develop a relationship with. You know, it's it's just um it's it's high, it can be high drama, but it can also be like we we might be high drama. We've been we've been there, we've got each other through some high drama south by emotions are on high alert during South Bite, and so lots of interesting things can happen. Um, but it's also you know, amidst that there's so much beauty and creativity and and camaraderie, and it's really special. So I'm always excited to hear like you know, after South Bite, like how what came out of it for you and what was you know good for you. So we'll we'll do like a little little meetup afterwards.

SPEAKER_01 57:59

But we should, I mean, we should probably actually meet up during it. We should probably meet up during it. Absolutely. That'll be fun. And and um Dylan LeBlanc, who I've been managing for a little while now, he'll be in town and and playing a bunch of shows. And I actually haven't met him yet. No way. Oh, that's so funny. So that's one thing I'm looking forward to actually like spending time with this artist I work with and and getting to know him and like see, you know, how things work for him. Like I some of my other artists like Betty Sue, I kind of know what before a show and after a show is gonna look like for her, you know. But I've also I've known her and been around her performing for over a decade. Totally, yeah. Um so I just want to kind of get to get to know this artist better, um, so that I can be a better manager to him since our relationship is still kind of new. Um and and that'll be fun and interesting.

SPEAKER_03 58:53

Yeah, I saw he's playing uh cosmic. I'm excited. I think I'm gonna try to think I can make his set there. So I'm gonna try to try to be there for that because I really like him. I'm I'm a fan. So I'm I'm excited about this new relationship. So um great.

SPEAKER_01 59:09

Well, I will be there and then we can take a selfie that you can use when you post about this podcast. Exactly.

SPEAKER_03 59:17

Exactly. Yes, yes, we can do our our podcast selfie. So okay, I will end the very, very last question. What advice would you give to a a mom in music, someone who's like kind of just becoming a mom or thinking about becoming a mom at some point? Any any advice for them?

SPEAKER_01 59:34

Ooh, well, those are all different.

SPEAKER_03 59:37

They are, they are. I guess uh I guess like maybe let's let's take it to like someone who's thinking about becoming a mom, like dreams of becoming a mom, but they they have these sort of things in their mind of like, oh, I can't, it'll mess up my career, or it'll, you know, yeah. What would you tell somebody who's that that might be either a myth buster or maybe not a myth buster, but just something that is good to remember as they're heading into it?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:05

I mean, I I guess I would say you just really don't know until you're in it. And that that kind of that that could go either way, right? I would say there's no way you can understand the challenges of trying to do both, you know. So there's no way you can know that. But you also don't know your stamina and resilience, your ability to manage time. You don't know all of that uh until you're in it and how capable you might be of managing both. So you you just don't know. So you know, you can you can take guesses at at what it's gonna be like for you, but you also don't know who your kid's gonna be. There are so many things you don't know. So you have to just if you want to do it, just do it and you'll find out, you know. Yeah. Um but oh one more thing. Yeah, I I have not read this book, but I just saw somebody post about this book that um and I just I sent a link to a friend of mine, so I'm gonna find it. Um it was a book that takes you through like all the different stages of your life if you had a kid or if you didn't have a kid, and like what this phase of life would look like if you had a kid or didn't. It's like a book like a sliding doors or choose your own adventure. Yes, like trying to yes, choose your own adventure, exactly. What it would look like if you had a kid or didn't have a kid and things to consider. So I would say, get a hold of that book. I mean, I have already made my choice, but I'm so curious to read it too, just to consider all those things. I think it'd be interesting.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:45

Yeah, it is interesting. Every once in a blue moon, I I have this pause moment of like, where would I be right now if I didn't have kids? I'm so curious what I would be doing. Would I like be at this elevated point in my career? Would I have like grown tired of it somehow and pivoted on something else? Like it is. I mean, obviously we'll never know. And and I don't regret it in any way, shape, or form. But it's just, you know, I think everybody probably does that, right? With like many different things, careers, partners, uh, where they live, etc. You know, so many big life choices. But um, that is interesting. I'm gonna go look up that here.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:20

I I found it. It was like uh it was a New York magazine article. It says, on the fence about having kids, read this book. Merle Bombardieri's 1981 sleeper hit, the baby decision is having a moment. So it's from 1981, which is actually the year I was born. Wow, yeah, that's the year after I was born. Yeah, that's crazy. Okay, okay. Even crazy, who knows? Maybe someone should write a new one now because it's a great concept for a book, but right, an updated modern version of it.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:51

Yeah, yeah. That's awesome. Well, thank you so much, Charlie, for spending time with me today. And I just think you're an awesome mama, friend, uh, musician, artist manager. You are just a wonderful human in the world, and I'm grateful to know you. So thank you for spending time with you. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:10

I'm yeah, thanks for having me. And I'm also very, very grateful to have you as a musician mom friend, because there aren't that many people who understand both, you know. Um, so but probably anyone listening is or a lot of people listening are in that boat too. So, you know, yeah, it's good that we have each other. It really is.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:35

Totally, totally. You know, it's funny, I'll reflect on one more thing. Recently, I was part of a a singer-songwriter um bill at a venue in town um with some great singer-songwriter girls. None of them have children. I'm the only one who had children. And it was just funny navigating, even like soundcheck. They all showed up and soundchecked and then like hung out afterwards and had pizza. And I had to run home after soundcheck, get one of my kids, drop her off at a sleepover, like arranged. And it was just, it was just kind of this moment of like, oh wow. Okay. Cause sometimes I'm I'm on bills with lots of other mom musicians. We know many in our community, and and that's kind of lovely because it's like we all kind of get it. But it was just kind of funny being like, oh, right, y'all, y'all don't have to go deal with all this, all this crap, you know. So it's just, it's funny. It's and it doesn't bother me in the least. Like I'm totally able to, I'm used to it by now, right? I'm like 10 years in. Yeah. Exactly. I was just like, oh wow, right. Okay, interesting. But yes, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom with us. And um, and I look forward to hanging out with you during the crazy South by Madness.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:45

Yay.