Ep 10 - The bathroom ghost is "P!nk like the inside of your L...?"

In the Tenth episode of Death Drop Dead Boo! Khakii and Cl!toraaa Hood read creepy ghost stories, unveil the location of "Cl!toraaa's Cursed Counties" and take a peruse through their paranormal playbook... Black Shuck edition. 

Who are we shipping in 'I Kissed A Girl?', Is YouTube actually Psychic Sally? Would you cut off Cl!toraaa's ears? 

Stay Spooky 'xo 

Ways to reach us:

• Instagram - @deathdropdead_
• TikTok - @deathdropdead_
• Youtube - Death Drop Dead 
• Email - deathdropdeadpod@gmail.com

Do you want to feature on the pod? Send us your creepy stories and your unexplained dreams, or do you know of any ookie spooky locations that we can visit, let us know. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:22

A ruler, what the ruler?

SPEAKER_06 0:23

You want a ruler.

SPEAKER_01 0:25

I actually can't swear I can't be bothered.

SPEAKER_06 0:28

I know you survived.

SPEAKER_01 0:31

Incredible. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_06 0:34

You said I'm swollen like a hot air balloon. You are revolting. Hate crime. You're fat phobic.

SPEAKER_04 0:39

So General, thank you very much for pink lighting inside of your labia. Ollie, hola. Hi, mate.

SPEAKER_01 0:50

Hi, mate. You're right.

SPEAKER_06 0:52

Yeah, I'll be watching our football to Alan.

SPEAKER_01 0:55

Hola.

SPEAKER_06 0:56

Hola.

SPEAKER_01 0:56

Yes, mate.

SPEAKER_06 0:57

That is Clitora Hood, our local lesbian diva who cannot sing, Lady Marmalade.

SPEAKER_01 1:04

I thought you were just gonna say cannot sing, period.

SPEAKER_06 1:06

Period. Done. She shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:08

I was thinking, you fucker. And that is um Bookhaki who cannot sing.

SPEAKER_06 1:13

I can't sing. Fantastic. I love your nails.

SPEAKER_01 1:17

Yeah. Gorgeous. They're great, aren't they?

SPEAKER_06 1:19

Yeah, perfect.

SPEAKER_01 1:20

Um, so this is what is this? What to know?

unknown 1:27

Desktop.

SPEAKER_01 1:29

Episode 10. Hallelujah. It's raining ten. A fam. That's my lyrics.

SPEAKER_04 1:38

They're your ones. They are my lyrics. From your iconic show. Iconica. Iconico.

SPEAKER_01 1:44

You know who I got hate when I got hate on TikTok for it?

SPEAKER_06 1:47

Oh, you did?

SPEAKER_01 1:48

Yeah. When I uploaded the Billy Eilish part and they're like, you're not Billy.

SPEAKER_06 1:52

No, I'm Clitora.

SPEAKER_01 1:54

I don't want to be Billy. That's not me.

SPEAKER_06 1:57

No. Oh my god. Like, thanks for stating the obvious. No, I'm not Billy.

SPEAKER_01 2:03

To be fair, I do wish I. Do I want to be Billy or do I want to be with Billy? Be with.

SPEAKER_06 2:09

Lesbians, do you want to be Billy or do you want to be with Billy?

SPEAKER_01 2:12

I know the answer, and it's be with. Some people might want to be.

SPEAKER_06 2:15

They might like masturbation.

SPEAKER_04 2:19

Awful.

SPEAKER_06 2:20

True though.

SPEAKER_04 2:22

I am a perv.

SPEAKER_06 2:23

Anyway, Clitty.

SPEAKER_04 2:24

Yes, dear.

SPEAKER_06 2:25

How are you been, darling?

SPEAKER_01 2:26

I've been alright, darling.

SPEAKER_06 2:27

Yes, dear.

SPEAKER_01 2:28

Yes, dear. Babs.

SPEAKER_06 2:30

Babs. Love Babs.

SPEAKER_01 2:31

My teeth are getting stuck to my lip. My lips are getting stuck. Teeth, mouth. Oh.

SPEAKER_03 2:38

What happened there? Ritora's malfunction.

SPEAKER_01 2:40

I have. I've glitched.

SPEAKER_06 2:43

Glitch in the matrix. So, um, how you been? Tell me all.

SPEAKER_01 2:49

I've been good. Nothing's really happened in my life, I don't think.

SPEAKER_06 2:52

No.

SPEAKER_01 2:53

No. I can't think.

SPEAKER_06 2:55

Can't recall.

SPEAKER_01 2:56

No. What's happened in your life?

SPEAKER_06 2:58

So I've been working and editing the podcast. I'll be surprised. Woe be me. I got my hair chopped today.

SPEAKER_01 3:05

You did?

SPEAKER_06 3:06

Yeah, I've got a little Bob.

SPEAKER_01 3:08

I was thinking what you've done.

SPEAKER_06 3:10

Little cute Bob. No, my real, my boy hair, boy khaki hair.

SPEAKER_01 3:13

Yeah, I have actually seen it. You don't need to tell me, right?

SPEAKER_06 3:16

Well, I'm gonna explain it when you're gonna be here. We haven't done it for a couple weeks. Oh my god. So my hair, I've been determined to try and bring rat tails back in. I know some people have rat tails, but I really want a long rat tail all the way down my spine, so my hair looks like my central nervous system. Like brain and spinal cord, that's what I'm after.

SPEAKER_01 3:39

I honestly I didn't know what that was.

SPEAKER_06 3:40

And it looks so good. So um I've got a lovely little fade, a picture of it. Obviously, I've got a bob, you can't see. Lovely little fade, and I've got a nice long, I don't know, inches. Um, a substantial rat tail hanging down.

SPEAKER_01 3:54

I mean, you could compare it um you filthy, filthy animal.

SPEAKER_06 4:03

Compare it to a ruler. Yeah, ruler.

SPEAKER_01 4:06

So if you had a 30 centimetre ruler, oh um, which is a generic ruler, no? How do you say it? Ruler, ruler, ruler, ruler, a ruler, what the f are you on about?

SPEAKER_06 4:17

A ruler.

SPEAKER_01 4:18

I actually can't speak, I can't be bothered.

SPEAKER_06 4:21

She's over. I'm out, she's done. Done. I think it's about 25 centimetres. Is that dramatic? Yeah, I think you're pushing it. Like it goes past my shoulder blades. No, it's on my shoulder blades.

SPEAKER_01 4:32

Okay, so I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 4:33

But I have got a hunch back in my neck, so it does have to go over a little bump.

SPEAKER_01 4:38

It's got scoliosis.

SPEAKER_06 4:40

I do.

SPEAKER_01 4:42

Oh, I'd hate that.

SPEAKER_06 4:43

Honestly. But you would be able to play hide and seek really well. You could definitely get into the weird, wonderful places.

SPEAKER_01 4:48

I mean, 10 out of 10, because I was thinking about all the disability money I could get.

SPEAKER_06 4:53

Here we go.

SPEAKER_01 4:55

Fraud the government, fraud the government, fraud the government. How do you say it? Tax the rich, fuck that. That's all.

SPEAKER_06 5:02

Yeah, tax evasion, chuck out in there as well. Go for it, Dallas. Mart as well. Been doing. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 5:09

What is it?

SPEAKER_06 5:10

We have been watching I kissed the girl. I kissed the girl.

SPEAKER_01 5:16

I liked it. Did you?

SPEAKER_06 5:18

No, I hated every second of it.

SPEAKER_01 5:20

Have you kissed the girl?

SPEAKER_06 5:21

I have.

SPEAKER_01 5:21

I mean you have you've kissed me.

SPEAKER_06 5:23

Not properly.

unknown 5:24

No.

SPEAKER_06 5:25

I'll give you a peck. I can't stop. Yeah, no. That'll make I I am not playing playing tonsil tennis with you. You get tonsilites too often.

SPEAKER_01 5:33

It's been years.

SPEAKER_06 5:34

It has.

SPEAKER_01 5:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 5:35

And imagine, like, you're kissing someone, you're playing a bit of tonsil tennis, you get a tonsil stone.

SPEAKER_01 5:40

I nearly government named you.

SPEAKER_06 5:42

Yeah, that is my I hate. I've only ever like seen one tonsil stone in my life, and it was revolting. Not on me. Not on me. No, it was my cousin, actually. He said, that's me name. He said, boo, look. And I wanted to die. It's the stinkiest thing. You stink. You stink.

SPEAKER_01 6:06

It's like your little dance.

SPEAKER_06 6:07

Yeah, my little stinky bum dance. I love it. He's so fun.

SPEAKER_01 6:10

So yeah, I kissed a girl. It is brilliant. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 6:13

Fantastic.

SPEAKER_01 6:14

It's brilliant, Finn.

SPEAKER_06 6:15

Finn. Um, done. Anyway, guys.

SPEAKER_01 6:17

Um no.

SPEAKER_06 6:19

So I kissed a girl, a little lesbian, yeah, dating show.

SPEAKER_01 6:22

And it's now done.

SPEAKER_06 6:24

It's finished because obviously they want to hate crime us during Pride Months.

SPEAKER_01 6:27

Yeah. And I kissed a boy is done also.

SPEAKER_06 6:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:29

Um, but I kissed a girl.

SPEAKER_06 6:30

I would have applied for it.

SPEAKER_01 6:32

Yeah. I kissed a girl is the one that we've watched just now. Yeah. So who was your fave?

SPEAKER_06 6:37

My fave. Um at the start. So it's full spoiler alert here. Full spoilers. Um, my favourite, spoiler, spoiler. Um, Nikita. Because I loved her little energy. She's going around chatting to everyone. She was very carefree. She, I I love that beaver. I can't love it.

SPEAKER_01 6:59

Hers and Pippa's relationship. Oh, that just came completely out of the blue. And then when Pippa walked in, I thought, oh yeah, that's me. Like, that's what that's what I aim to look like.

SPEAKER_06 7:11

And they are so, so chill. So like just yeah. I honestly love them. But them two together, beautiful.

SPEAKER_01 7:19

Stunning. And the fact that they're still together has just made my life warmed up.

SPEAKER_06 7:24

Yeah. So Clay, who do you like? Who was your vibe?

SPEAKER_01 7:27

To be honest, I I quite liked them all.

SPEAKER_06 7:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:31

Um my favourite.

SPEAKER_06 7:32

Who did you fancy?

SPEAKER_01 7:33

Who did I fancy? Tyra.

SPEAKER_06 7:35

Oh Tyra.

SPEAKER_01 7:36

Yeah. And um Kaylee.

SPEAKER_06 7:41

Yeah. I fancy Kayleigh.

SPEAKER_01 7:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 7:43

Yeah. Like, I do think I want to look like her. Oh, yeah. Imagine.

SPEAKER_01 7:47

Oh, she's like the Y2K, like she's Y2K Princesa. Principessa. What's Princess in Spanish?

SPEAKER_06 7:56

Princesa. I think. And then Italiano, Principessa. Principessa.

SPEAKER_01 8:01

I think I've been.

SPEAKER_06 8:04

I could be lying, I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_01 8:06

Um, and I loved Ebony. Not like, I mean, I think she is absolutely beautiful.

SPEAKER_06 8:13

Gorgeous.

SPEAKER_01 8:13

Personally, not my like type of woman, I guess. Yeah. But her personality, it killed me. Yeah. The fact that she was like so masculine presenting, but then so feminine. Like it was just perfect.

SPEAKER_06 8:29

It was. And she allowed herself to explore her femininity, which was so refreshing. It really was.

SPEAKER_01 8:35

I will take a leaf out of your young book.

SPEAKER_06 8:37

Correct. And I loved Imogen. Imogen. Oh, I love her. She brought the comedy gold TV. Excellence. Um, I know her and Ebony didn't work. Okay. I was thinking who the fuck is Imogen?

SPEAKER_01 8:54

I just couldn't remember.

SPEAKER_06 8:55

I'm so bad with names. Heartbroken.

SPEAKER_01 8:56

I'm really bad with names.

SPEAKER_06 8:58

We were singing her praises for that whole part where she was there because she is a drama queen.

SPEAKER_01 9:01

Yeah, I did love the drama that she brought. I loved her.

SPEAKER_06 9:04

She was spicy. She is made for reality TV. Get her on everything.

SPEAKER_01 9:09

Yeah. And that bit at the kiss-off, she broke my heart. Like don't choosing yourself, get it, Diva.

SPEAKER_06 9:16

Her and Tyra weren't that they chose themselves.

SPEAKER_01 9:18

And did Ebony choose herself as well?

SPEAKER_06 9:20

Oh, Ebony did. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:22

I think it was five people went that episode.

SPEAKER_06 9:24

It was wild. Yeah, it was wild.

SPEAKER_01 9:26

Mad episode.

SPEAKER_06 9:26

Yeah. So that was that was brilliant. I really I did enjoy it. I weren't sure at first.

SPEAKER_01 9:32

No, because season one was so good. Like to live up to season one with Amy, Fiorenza, like I loved Fiorenza.

SPEAKER_06 9:41

I loved Amy.

SPEAKER_01 9:42

Oh, yeah. Like we we have met Amy.

SPEAKER_06 9:44

We've met Amy, and she is exactly as she is on the TV. She is just the most chill, cool, very funny.

SPEAKER_01 9:51

So funny. I think we should put a picture.

SPEAKER_06 9:56

So does anyone want to draw us a picture of Amy Spaulding laid out like a French girl here? Oh sorry, I've made Marina dizzy. She's spinning.

SPEAKER_01 10:05

I actually meant should we put the picture here of me and Amy because you didn't get the picture.

SPEAKER_06 10:09

Oh, okay. Picture here. Are you out? What era of your life are you in then? Are you firm?

SPEAKER_01 10:18

I don't really know what era. I had like the I had the blonde, the slick back, but not slick, but it was straight, lot, medium length hair.

SPEAKER_06 10:28

You're experimenting with yourself.

SPEAKER_01 10:30

Always obviously, what am I wearing? Me jersey.

SPEAKER_06 10:32

Of course. Yeah. She loves the jersey.

SPEAKER_01 10:34

I love that fucking jersey. It's my fave.

SPEAKER_06 10:36

Your comfort.

SPEAKER_01 10:37

Yeah, that's how I feel good. If we're going on a night out, what am I wearing?

SPEAKER_06 10:40

Jersey and a checkered shirt.

SPEAKER_01 10:43

It's because everyone feeds it. I walked out when we went to Freedom, so Freedom, London, Bar with a poll.

SPEAKER_06 10:49

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 10:50

Love it.

SPEAKER_06 10:50

You need a pole.

SPEAKER_01 10:51

Have we spoken about Freedom before?

SPEAKER_06 10:53

No. Oh my god. No, we haven't. We need to get into it. Get going. Get into it, Clitty.

SPEAKER_01 11:00

So when was the first time we went to Freedom? We went to Sheba, didn't we? And then we randomly went, we went to Freedom after. We didn't know really. We met some galleys and we went in. Well, there's a fucking pole, isn't there? Oh, there is two. Um, but I have a specific pole that I like. One night I did have to go on the other pole, and I was really upset.

SPEAKER_06 11:21

So it just didn't feel dynamic, didn't it? No. But when Clotora says she goes on the pole.

SPEAKER_01 11:26

I don't go on it often.

SPEAKER_06 11:27

No, when we do have like a cute night out, she gets into the club, she walks straight to the pole. I have to go and get us a drink. Um, she's on there, does not leave the pole, she doesn't go to the toilet, um, she doesn't get down off the pole, so I have to sort of dance on my toddl, have a cute time, um, and she'll stay on that pole until the lights turn on, and the security have to pry her from said pole. But in the meantime, I am I am present, I am with you, but she loves to perform. So I'm there making these little music videos, and I think one, no, you're not why because I'm Gorda. She's not Gordita, she is Gorda.

SPEAKER_01 12:10

Yeah, when did we go last when we went to see Valencia? We went to Valencia Gray from Bathendonna.

SPEAKER_06 12:18

We did.

SPEAKER_01 12:19

Um, that was very fun because then I felt like I had more of an audience to perform to.

SPEAKER_06 12:23

You did, you did, yeah, and we'd spoke absolutely hyped you up and spoke it into existence that you are a full performance. Performance.

SPEAKER_01 12:31

I'm a full performance.

SPEAKER_06 12:32

You are a full um Risa Colm.

SPEAKER_01 12:35

Yeah, and then I end up with these with these little gay boys on the pole. You do. Um, I end up kissing them.

SPEAKER_06 12:43

A lesbian and twink, love story.

SPEAKER_01 12:45

Yeah, I just love them. Like, it's just brilliant.

SPEAKER_06 12:48

It is fantastic.

SPEAKER_01 12:48

And then everyone's yeah, so everyone bigs me up when I'm in there, like, oh, that outfit looks so nice. Oh my god, you give like Billy, and I'm like, oh, stop it.

SPEAKER_03 12:56

Stop it.

SPEAKER_01 12:57

And I'm on the pole, and they're like, Oh my god, we wish we could be like you. Yeah, I know.

SPEAKER_03 13:01

It's um hard not like being me.

SPEAKER_01 13:04

When really I'm an insecure little puppy.

SPEAKER_06 13:06

A puppy?

SPEAKER_01 13:07

Yeah, I don't know why. Oh, what kind of puppy?

SPEAKER_06 13:10

I would have said a calf.

SPEAKER_01 13:11

But you're gonna call me a calf.

SPEAKER_06 13:13

I would have said you look like a truck.

SPEAKER_01 13:15

A truck, yeah, deep fried deep fried.

SPEAKER_06 13:19

Why are you deep frying a truck? You absolute gannet. That is non-edible. You have argued you need to stop.

SPEAKER_01 13:29

Yeah, I've told you to stop. Parada. Parada.

SPEAKER_06 13:33

Parada.

SPEAKER_01 13:34

Parada, what's that?

SPEAKER_06 13:35

That's like a chip. Gorgeous.

SPEAKER_01 13:39

I'm so hungry.

SPEAKER_06 13:40

Anyway, um we've gone. We go on so many tangents.

SPEAKER_01 13:43

Yes, I have tangerines. So I hope you enjoyed. I talk about um what we're talking about.

SPEAKER_06 13:49

Good question.

SPEAKER_01 13:50

I can see and freedom.

SPEAKER_06 13:52

Cross with tangent one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

SPEAKER_01 13:56

Yeah, what kind of era?

SPEAKER_06 13:59

We love it.

SPEAKER_01 14:00

Um, anyway. What?

SPEAKER_06 14:04

Would you?

SPEAKER_01 14:05

Would I what?

SPEAKER_06 14:07

Can you hear that? It's fucking story time! Yeah, woo! Would you like a store?

SPEAKER_01 14:16

I mean, if you want.

SPEAKER_06 14:18

I do. I'm gonna take my glove off seducely. I'm still taking my glove off, so that's two fingers for those who can't see. The third finger's now coming. Oh, oh, it's off. Four, four fingers.

SPEAKER_01 14:34

Oh four fingers to the fair. Five.

SPEAKER_06 14:38

Oh, my glove is off.

SPEAKER_01 14:40

You're disgusting.

SPEAKER_06 14:41

Why? I was just talking people through my um I don't know where I am regime. So we have my story. So this story I found online, and it was a story that really tickled me a little bit, we can say. Let me just look.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

You are fully speaking full bullshit, aren't you?

SPEAKER_06 15:07

No, it really did tickle me.

SPEAKER_01 15:08

Oh, I thought you were just trying to clear the no, I'm on it.

SPEAKER_06 15:11

Dead air. Um, no, no, no. You're calling me dead air. You've said I'm swollen like a hot air balloon. You are revolting. Hate crime, you're fat phobic.

SPEAKER_01 15:20

I can't be fat phobic.

SPEAKER_06 15:24

Remove the phobic. Anyway, um, yeah, it fully tickled me in the sense that it made me uneasy. Right. But I did find it quite camp.

unknown 15:34

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 15:35

So I'm not going to tell you the title because it'll give everything away.

SPEAKER_00 15:40

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_06 15:41

I know. So are you ready?

unknown 15:43

I'm ready.

SPEAKER_06 15:46

I probably use YouTube more than any other streaming service. Really, it's become kind of a routine. To reward myself for a hard day at school, when I get home, I'll just curl up in bed with snacks and a soda, and I'll let myself drift into the world of commentary and niche documentaries. I'll turn off the lights, I'll lock the door, load a smoke machine.

SPEAKER_01 16:09

What's that from?

SPEAKER_06 16:11

Let's have a kiki. I want to have a kiki dive. Turn work. Let's have a kiki. It's turkey lucky time. Anyway. Don't know the words. So I'll turn off the lights. I can't I just keep hearing scissors.

SPEAKER_01 16:25

I thought it was pose. I was ready to go. Come judge for me.

SPEAKER_06 16:29

Come judge. Come judge for me. Um, I'll lock my door and I'll just live in my own universe for a few hours. Bedroom. That's what I was doing tonight. I had my pajamas on, I had my bowl of popcorn, and I was searching for the perfect video. As I scroll past video after video, with none really catching my interest. That's when I came across a thumbnail. This thumbnail put a lump in my throat.

SPEAKER_00 16:54

Oh.

SPEAKER_06 16:55

I wasn't on social media. I didn't upload videos yet. Yet somehow it was me in the picture rank. My eyes were bloodshot. My skin was pale. I stared into the camera lifelessly.

SPEAKER_01 17:10

Oh god, I'd be so upset. My skin's pale.

SPEAKER_06 17:14

Honestly. Someone getting some Saint Maris.

SPEAKER_01 17:17

Winter is my worst month because I am white.

unknown 17:20

White.

SPEAKER_01 17:21

Like it's horrible. I just like a little tan. It's a slight little bronze. Yeah, it just makes me look better.

SPEAKER_06 17:27

There you go.

SPEAKER_01 17:28

Sorry, um, Sandra. You continue.

SPEAKER_06 17:30

So depressed that you're pale.

SPEAKER_01 17:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 17:34

So, of course, I clicked on the video without hesitation.

SPEAKER_01 17:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 17:38

The screen buffered for a moment before the video began rolling. It was just me laying in bed.

SPEAKER_01 17:45

No.

SPEAKER_06 17:46

I had a bowl of popcorn at my side. I wore the same red pajamas and my laptop rested in my lap. That alone was disturbing enough. But what created this sense of uncanny disturbance in my heart was the look on my face. I looked terrified. Tears streamed down my cheeks. My mouth hung agape as I screamed. Let's gape these holes.

SPEAKER_01 18:11

George's. Oh, you think you're so sick.

SPEAKER_06 18:14

My da da da my mouth hung agape as I screamed like a child. As the video, I've missed the whole section. So um my mouth did hang agape, but my mouth hung agape as I screamed like a child at someone off-screen. Oh horrible. As the video went on, I felt more and more sick to my stomach. The man behind the recording had propped his camera up to face me as he approached me angrily. He wore one of those weirdly human masks like you'd see in the purge movies.

SPEAKER_01 18:46

Uh hate them.

SPEAKER_06 18:48

Awful. He was dressed entirely in black, and he gripped a bloodstained knife so tightly that it shook in his hand. I watched as he proceeded to beat me. I heard my own bones breaking, blood poured from my nose, teeth began to fly from my mouth. Honestly, that's so dentists are so expensive.

SPEAKER_01 19:07

So expensive. And to get teeth as well, you can't even get that on the NHS.

SPEAKER_06 19:11

Yeah, no, madness. The me in the video tried to scream, but he just didn't have the energy. What came out was weak and pitiful. He started with my toes, tearing through them one by one while I squirmed and kicked firmly. Kicked faintly. Then he moved to the fingers, bending and breaking them as he soared away with his knife.

SPEAKER_01 19:34

Oh, this is torture.

SPEAKER_06 19:36

Torture. Then he took to my ears, holding them up at the sides of his head like he was trying them on. Fuck me, if he tried yours on, Jesus Christ. I was broken and still. I wanted to look away, but I just couldn't. The man had his fun, and now it was time to finish what he started. Pressing a finger hard against my swollen lips, he slowly plunged a knife deeper and deeper into my torso until the blade disappeared.

SPEAKER_01 20:04

Question. Where's your torso? Like this part.

SPEAKER_06 20:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:08

The trunk.

SPEAKER_06 20:09

Trunk. When he was done, he stared down at me. He put his finger together like he was looking through a camera, admiring his work. His head slowly rolled over his shoulder and back towards the camera. The video ended with the man placing his hand over the camera before the screen went to black and the replay button popped up in the centre.

SPEAKER_02 20:29

Oh.

unknown 20:30

I know.

SPEAKER_06 20:31

I would be so creeped out haven't just watched all of that.

unknown 20:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 20:35

Like I'm thinking this is some AI sort of shit.

SPEAKER_01 20:37

Yeah. It's like that. Um, do you remember that Black Mirror episode, Joan is awful?

SPEAKER_06 20:43

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 20:43

When she's got like a Netflix series. I don't really remember it very well. I don't know if we liked it that much when we watched it.

unknown 20:49

I can't recall.

SPEAKER_01 20:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 20:50

I know the episode drawn about, but I can't recall specifics.

SPEAKER_01 20:53

No, I think she just had a series about it, but I can't really remember why or what it was about.

SPEAKER_06 20:57

Feel free to message us and tell us. Yeah, because can't remember. Very handy. So I thought for sure I was seeing a deep fake. Makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 21:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 21:07

A cruel and disturbing prank created by someone with far too much time on their hands.

SPEAKER_01 21:11

Like a friend at school. Exactly. Or like a bully.

SPEAKER_06 21:13

Yeah. However, when I heard the sound of my mum's screams morph into wet, bubbling gurgles from my living room. My blood turned to ice. Footsteps began to approach my bedroom slowly. Step, step, step. They stopped right outside my door. The sound of a knife scratching against the wood penetrated my heart. And the sound of my rattling door handle. And the sound of my rattling door handle left me paralysed. I'm writing this now because he's trying to get in. He's throwing himself against the door. And with each blow, the door gives more and more. And I don't know how much more the lock can actually take.

SPEAKER_01 21:58

Is that the end? Well, I want to know if she died.

SPEAKER_06 22:02

Hey. He's misgendered.

SPEAKER_01 22:04

Oh, sorry. So sorry.

SPEAKER_06 22:06

I think eerie. Quite camp. Like your psychic sal.

SPEAKER_01 22:12

Um, I've got a I've got some like someone's done something of me on YouTube. Like I haven't done it. Someone's put it up of me. Yeah. Like, I'm famous.

SPEAKER_06 22:21

It's an edit.

SPEAKER_01 22:22

It's an edit.

SPEAKER_06 22:23

Yeah. Um, and then to turn out it's a premonition, and you're actually about to die.

SPEAKER_01 22:26

Yeah, I would have jumped out of the window.

SPEAKER_06 22:28

I support it. See you later.

SPEAKER_01 22:29

Like Rivador Chi. I'd have rather died jumping out of the window.

SPEAKER_06 22:32

Then tortured to death. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:34

Especially if it's going to be like that. Like what fucking taking your fingers off and shit.

SPEAKER_06 22:38

I want to know um what they've done to deserve this, whether it's a um random attack, whether it's targeted. I want context.

SPEAKER_01 22:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 22:46

That'd be grand.

SPEAKER_01 22:47

Um could be a reform voter. I reckon so. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 22:51

I could write a um a little short story, a little pre, a prequel, and a sequel. That'd be fun, wouldn't it?

SPEAKER_01 22:58

Oh, yeah, you could.

SPEAKER_06 22:59

I'm gonna put my glove back on whilst you're searching for your story. I've got my story. We're gonna go one, two, three, four, five. The thumbs are in. Nice.

SPEAKER_01 23:14

Great, fantastic, brilliant.

SPEAKER_05 23:18

Excellent.

SPEAKER_01 23:21

Super.

SPEAKER_04 23:22

Mediocre.

SPEAKER_01 23:23

Yeah, but you're that's the different like we were doing good things. Mediocre's like half off.

SPEAKER_06 23:28

Rad.

SPEAKER_01 23:29

Rad. Cool.

SPEAKER_06 23:31

You're so radical. Well, right. So with the light. I love a store.

SPEAKER_01 23:37

So years ago, I was in England at an ex-boyfriend's home in a large Victoria mansion in Brandon, Suffolk.

SPEAKER_06 23:47

Oh, local. And he's with um he, she, they are with a boyfriend from England. Dump him.

SPEAKER_01 23:57

Gorgeous English countryside. It was his parents' home that had been in his family for about three generations. If I remember correctly, that's not it. Go again. It was his parents' home that had been in his family for about three generations, if I remember correctly. He was called into work and I was left in the home with his mother. Great. For you. Honestly. Nothing ever comes good from a is that the right way? Nothing ever comes. Nothing ever good comes from a mother-in-law. Yeah. I mean, you can prove me wrong if you want. Yeah. Um, she came upstairs to let me know that she was going to be running errands and she would be gone for the day, so I was home alone. Ah, lovely. About an hour past, and I got up to use the bathroom, which was inside the bedroom. Instinctively.

SPEAKER_05 24:47

Instinctively.

SPEAKER_06 24:48

But also very posh to have um got an en suite.

SPEAKER_01 24:50

Yeah.

unknown 24:51

Very posh.

SPEAKER_01 24:52

Yeah, so posh you had an ensuite. I mean, I've had an en suite.

SPEAKER_05 24:55

I'm posh. Quite simply.

SPEAKER_01 24:58

Yeah, okay. Instinctively, I went in and locked the door out of habit, even though I was home alone. Yeah. I mean, I don't lock the door at any point. I've never been a toilet door locker.

SPEAKER_06 25:10

Um, I do now a little bit, but like it depends on.

SPEAKER_01 25:14

You always do.

SPEAKER_06 25:15

No, like sometimes I just leave it open.

SPEAKER_01 25:17

Well, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 25:17

Like it just depends on what I'm feeling.

SPEAKER_01 25:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 25:20

If I'm gonna be sitting there absolutely defecating into the bowl, then I will lock it.

SPEAKER_01 25:26

I just close it.

SPEAKER_06 25:27

Yeah, I like to lock in that case. I don't know why, but um, if I'm having a chat, then I don't want um like goblins and that to come in.

SPEAKER_01 25:36

Goblins, okay, yeah, fair. So da da da da da. The door to the bedroom was closed and the door to the bathroom was closed and locked. I heard knocking on the bedroom door and I kept answering for somebody to come in and no one answered. I heard knocking again, called out for them to come in and no answer. I assumed it was his mum who had forgotten something and returned to the house. A couple of minutes later, I heard a woman's voice from the other side of the wall in the bathroom, calling my name, and I kept answering, really thinking it was his mum. I heard this woman call me three or four more times, to which I answered, but I never got a response. About 45 minutes later, my ex came home and I told him how his mum was knocking on the door, and she must not have heard me. But she was but she was calling me and I was answering her, but she didn't hear me. I mean, you've repeated yourself, dear. I felt really bad because when I left the bathroom, she had left the house again. He was super confused because he told me his mum had been out all day and she wasn't back home. So I told him that she must have left. She told me she was leaving, but then less than an hour later, I assumed she'd forgot something because she definitely came back and was knocking on the door and calling me because I could hear her from the bathroom. His mum got back about three or four later for his mum got back about three or four hours later, and around the dinner table, I apologised for not getting to her before she left the house again. And she looked at me like I was insane. She had no idea what I was talking about. So I explained the story and she very flippantly said, Ah, that must have been the ghost of the girl.

SPEAKER_06 27:16

The ghost of the girl. As if it's normal. Yeah, that's just that's just me, neighbor. You know, she's dead, she's been dead for a hundred years, but she wanders around.

SPEAKER_01 27:24

Yeah, psychopath. Why did you not tell me before I'm coming because I'm not coming? Yeah, literally, like I'm not going to enter your vicinity.

SPEAKER_06 27:30

I probably would.

SPEAKER_01 27:31

I mean, I maybe would if it was like that and they've like witnessed that before, but I wouldn't be left home alone.

SPEAKER_06 27:36

No, no, no. Um, would you? It's you.

SPEAKER_01 27:39

If you know there's a known spirit, yeah, because I've been in my friend's house in Cumbria.

SPEAKER_06 27:46

That's bold of you.

SPEAKER_01 27:47

Yeah. Um, so and then everyone laughed. I laughed too. Yeah, I'd laugh. I'd be like, ha ha ha.

SPEAKER_00 27:56

It's so money. So funny, get me out.

SPEAKER_01 27:59

And I kind of believed it because I definitely believe in paranormal stuff. My ex got really serious and looked at me and said, I'll talk to you about it later. Psych laugh.

SPEAKER_03 28:09

I'm a saidless celebrity, get me out of here.

SPEAKER_01 28:12

After dinner, we went back upstairs and he said for me to show him where I could hear the woman calling me from. And I said, I was just from the other side of the wall in the bathroom. Okay. And he said, The wall in the bathroom? And I said, Yeah, the wall in the bathroom. And he said, What wall? So I went into the bathroom and pointed to the wall, and he said, You do realise that that wall is to the outside, right? We were I know. We were about four stories up. This house was massive. Oh god. A literal mansion. He said that I became white as a ghost because I didn't even realise that that was the case.

SPEAKER_06 28:44

So she's the ghost.

SPEAKER_01 28:46

Yeah, it's her. We were extremely high up, and on the other side of that wall was a courtyard with an in-ground pool far below us.

SPEAKER_06 28:54

I told you, Posh.

SPEAKER_01 28:56

What's an in-ground pool?

SPEAKER_06 28:57

Like a pool built into the ground.

SPEAKER_01 28:59

Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 29:01

Yeah, we've got a new host, a fly coming around somewhere.

SPEAKER_01 29:05

Somewhere, Mike. Oh my god! Get it away, where's it gone?

SPEAKER_06 29:11

It's flying, it's around, it's gone.

SPEAKER_01 29:14

Uh uh.

SPEAKER_03 29:16

Flies about.

SPEAKER_01 29:17

What was that? And the fly. What is that? Uh-huh.

unknown 29:27

No.

SPEAKER_01 29:27

He proceeded to tell me a story about a young woman back in the 1800s or so who lived in the house with her family and entered a relationship with an older man that the family didn't approve of, and they forbade they forbade her to see him. She rebelled and continued to see him anyway. When the family found out that she was secretly seeing him, they locked her in the room, which happened to be my ex's bedroom. I'm not quite sure how long she was locked in the room for, but there used to be train tracks that ran behind the house that you could still see in the courtyard. Apparently, she threw herself onto the train tracks out of the window, and people have heard her calling their names for years on end since she died. The whole family assumed that she was the one calling me because I was always at that house. Yeah. Needless to say, I never slept there again.

SPEAKER_06 30:19

No, you can fuck off. Yeah. I'm not gonna sleep there with a creepy um suicidal ghost girl that um wants to pout herself from the window onto a train track. Like she double jobbed it. Let's be honest. She just wants to be sure. She's got anxiety. Oh my god, so she said jumping from the window is not enough. Let me just go onto a train track.

SPEAKER_01 30:44

I really wasn't ready for that.

SPEAKER_06 30:46

No, um, Clites have spillage, she's leaked.

SPEAKER_01 30:50

I have. But you do need a tampon.

SPEAKER_06 30:54

No, no, sadly. Um, she's leaked from her other lips. So um, yeah, I think I agree. I'm not going to be returning.

SPEAKER_01 31:03

No, quite simply.

SPEAKER_06 31:04

And um checking my face. Yeah, your face is cute. Thank you. I know. She does look at Don't she look adorable? Look at the camera. Show everyone your lovely face. Oh, look at her, she's so insecure, she has to do that.

SPEAKER_01 31:16

Whereas I look and I think you can see yourself in the reflection though, no?

SPEAKER_06 31:21

Yeah, I can. I love this look. I look so cunty. I was trying to go for um like a little bit hillbilly, but um not really. I just like to put this outfit on.

SPEAKER_01 31:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 31:32

It shows. Um, only because I got this from Charity Shop the other day for a pound.

SPEAKER_01 31:37

Love that.

SPEAKER_06 31:37

Oh that's gorgeous in it.

SPEAKER_01 31:39

I mean, this is my outfit from Monster High.

SPEAKER_06 31:42

It is your Monster High look.

SPEAKER_01 31:43

Yeah, but I thought I just want to go all pink other than my skirt. All pink. Yeah, I thought I'd be pink today. Pink to make the girls wink.

SPEAKER_06 31:51

Oh, and in the world of jam Janelle Monet, as I said before, pink like the inside of your maybe. But I got I think I got it the wrong way around. I think last time I got it wrong, and I said pink like the inside of your baby. But I think it's maybe great.

SPEAKER_04 32:10

So, Janelle Monet, thank you very much for pink like the inside of your labya.

SPEAKER_06 32:16

Libya, Libya, it's like Libya with an accent.

SPEAKER_01 32:20

Yeah. So that was our stories.

SPEAKER_06 32:23

That was our stories of the week for episode 10.

SPEAKER_01 32:28

So do you know what it is next?

SPEAKER_06 32:31

What section is it next? Go and tell me.

SPEAKER_01 32:34

Claire, clear, clear, clear tourus, Curse Counties.

SPEAKER_06 32:40

Oh, shut up.

SPEAKER_01 32:43

So, would you like to know where we are going on our next ghost hunt? Oh good.

SPEAKER_06 32:47

I've realized that my um titty padding has come out.

SPEAKER_01 32:52

Or would you like me to just give you some facts about said place? Oh, and then I can tell you.

SPEAKER_06 32:58

But do I know the place?

SPEAKER_01 32:59

Yeah, you do.

SPEAKER_06 33:01

Well, well. Oh well, so somewhere I've been.

SPEAKER_01 33:04

And I've never been.

SPEAKER_06 33:06

Okay, that narrows down quite a lot. Yeah, you've probably got it already. Because we go to most places together.

SPEAKER_01 33:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 33:12

So it must be something from before I knew you.

SPEAKER_01 33:14

This you'll get it from the first line. This place I won't say then is often called Britain's Atlantis.

SPEAKER_06 33:23

Oh, stop it. I fucking love this place. I spat at you. Um, have my jams. I love this place so much.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

So it's a tiny atmospheric coastal village in Suffolk, renowned for its eerie legends. It was once once. Sham star going for meth. So it was once a major medieval medieval? Medieval.

SPEAKER_06 33:49

It was a major Madeira cake.

SPEAKER_01 33:52

Medieval capital. Most of the town, though, was swallowed by the North Sea.

SPEAKER_06 33:58

It was. And before you continue, have you heard um that joke about cake?

SPEAKER_01 34:04

What?

SPEAKER_06 34:05

So I can't remember jokes, so I'm gonna make it up as we're going. Right. Um, so my dad was putting on a cake sale, a bake sale, something along the lines there. And he advertised it and said a pound a slice, nice and fair. That fly is Bolton. Um, a pound a slice. But there was one cake that weren't um labelled. So someone said, Oh, is this one also a pound? And he said, No, that's my dearer cake.

SPEAKER_02 34:35

Yeah, funny.

SPEAKER_01 34:36

Well done.

SPEAKER_05 34:37

Congrats. Obviously, from the internet, it's a very well-known joke.

SPEAKER_01 34:40

I've never heard of that.

SPEAKER_05 34:41

I won't take accountability for it.

SPEAKER_01 34:43

No, accountability.

SPEAKER_06 34:45

Yeah, yeah, we'll rock and roll. Proceed, sorry.

SPEAKER_01 34:48

Okay, okay, okay, okay, so yeah, it was swallowed by the North Skit ski.

SPEAKER_06 34:56

Posh.

SPEAKER_01 34:57

Um, today it's cliffs and ruins are famous for spectral sightings and ghostly phenomena phenomena. Oh so there's submerged church bells, and when the waves and gulls gulls are quiet, it is said that the mournful ringing can be heard echoing through the sea mist.

SPEAKER_05 35:17

Oh, I know.

SPEAKER_01 35:19

And then we also have the Greyfriars Priory ruins there, and they are the ruins of the 13th century Franciscan friary, and they still stand on the clump crumbling cliff edges. And visitors and locals have reported seeing ghosts of monks, monks, monks, yeah, ghosts of monks wandering around the grounds, and strange supernatural lights known as hobby lanterns have been spotted flickering near the ruins. Very true. Now, the reason we are going to this place is because Dunn it is also heavily tied to the legend of the black shark.

SPEAKER_04 36:06

Oh, we're doing a shark episode, gorgeous.

SPEAKER_01 36:10

So apparently the black dog has a history of haunting the paths between Dunwich and the nearby marshes of Blytheburg.

SPEAKER_06 36:19

Yes, Blytheburg is where the scratchers are. Yeah, so um we won't discuss, we're on Dunwich, so we won't discuss Blytheburg. No, but um Dunwich was very much a childhood destination for me.

SPEAKER_01 36:32

Yeah, so weird.

SPEAKER_06 36:33

Yeah, like mum used to, I don't know what it was, um, but it's something that I cherish quite a lot. Like mum used to just want to to do something. She would just drive us to these random towns, random villages around Suffolk because they're seem to be the haunted ones, yeah. Um mum's taken us to many haunted places, I can't lie.

SPEAKER_01 36:50

But she's one of the most scared people I've ever been.

SPEAKER_06 36:52

Petrified. Yeah, like we've been to Borley Rectory, um Dunwich, and she would just go and drive us there um to just do something, and it was really nice.

SPEAKER_01 37:03

Is the beach nice then?

SPEAKER_06 37:04

Oh, it's lovely. Um, I can imagine it's probably quiet, to be fair, because it's not really known. I think I remember you have to go through like a little foresty drive to get there, um, which is quite cute. Like it's fully out of the way. Yes, um, but when we went there, it was midsummer, and we got out there was an ice cream van. Oh, brilliant film. Um, got the ice cream van, and thunderflies attacked us. So, like my sister's ice cream was colour of my gloves. Rank.

SPEAKER_01 37:31

Disgusting.

SPEAKER_06 37:32

Um, so there might be some birds and some little insects.

SPEAKER_01 37:34

Oh yeah, and you'll have to go on your own.

SPEAKER_06 37:36

Um so nice, I love that. Yeah, and then obviously next door, we do have or next door, I think close by we have Blyebeburg, yeah, which is the epicentre of black shark activity. So the likelihood of a black shark sighting in Dunnwich, I'd say is quite high.

SPEAKER_01 37:55

Yeah, me too.

SPEAKER_06 37:56

Definitely, and with the um ruins on the cliff edge, I haven't seen them.

SPEAKER_01 38:02

Well, no, I'm not going on a fucking cliff edge, not when it's crumbling.

SPEAKER_06 38:06

No, no, um, so you won't be seen on there, and then it's down. Honestly, then we've got a bloody fishes in the ground and earthquakes and all sorts.

SPEAKER_01 38:14

Yeah, the whole now bit the village is now all up there.

SPEAKER_06 38:17

Yeah, everyone's um getting that alert on their phone.

SPEAKER_01 38:20

Bing, bing, bing, bing.

SPEAKER_04 38:21

Are you safe logging on Facebook?

SPEAKER_06 38:24

Incredible, wild, but um, it's very, it's very nice. Um, what else do I guess have done itch? Yeah, when you hear the bells of the church now, it's eerie because it comes, it's you can get in that vibe that it's actually church from underneath the water. Yeah, and that's what mum used to always tell us when we were there is oh, listen, here comes the bells, and this is the bells from the Atlantis from the lost um town. Stop it, but it was the biggest port at one point.

SPEAKER_01 38:48

Because I think I was a mermaid, yeah. If I like there's Atlantis, yeah. I'd I'd get toxic thoughts. Toxic thoughts, I don't know, intrusive thoughts. I'd go scuba diving. I'll have to go under to find it. Why's no one done that?

SPEAKER_06 39:04

I think they probably have. Yeah, I can imagine they have.

SPEAKER_01 39:07

Surely, or is it really deep? Um because you can't go too deep with scuba stuff.

SPEAKER_06 39:13

Well, no, it's not gonna be the Mariana Trench.

SPEAKER_01 39:15

I don't know what that is.

SPEAKER_06 39:17

Deepest part of the ocean.

SPEAKER_01 39:18

Oh yeah, I'm not going there.

SPEAKER_06 39:20

No, you can't, you'll die.

SPEAKER_01 39:22

Yeah, I I don't go on there. I don't know why I said I'd scuba dive because I wouldn't.

SPEAKER_06 39:26

Have you ever scuba dived or snorkeled? Listen to my voice.

SPEAKER_01 39:28

I know. I've snorkeled in Egypt. Um, when I went on e when I went to Egypt on holiday, I went in the sea for about three um no, not three seconds. Um, probably about five minutes.

SPEAKER_04 39:44

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 39:44

And I walked along, but then there was a sea snake, so I had to get out. Like I was too sort of.

SPEAKER_06 39:48

Okay, that's that's valid.

SPEAKER_01 39:49

But then we found out recently, I'm sorry, they're they're bad. Like people, like that's the exact one I saw as well.

SPEAKER_06 39:56

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:56

So I'm glad I did get out because I could have died.

SPEAKER_06 39:58

You could have.

SPEAKER_01 39:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 39:59

So I've only um snorkeled.

SPEAKER_01 40:02

Yeah, I haven't, I've only snorkeled.

SPEAKER_06 40:03

Yeah, I snorkeled in Thailand. Oh my god, it was horrific. Was it horrific? Um I'm a good swimmer, like I can swim, I'm not shy to swim. Yeah, um, I just can't tread water well, so I have to just keep moving.

SPEAKER_04 40:16

Oh, okay. Just keep moving, moving, moving.

SPEAKER_06 40:19

Um, because I'm not swimming, so I flap about. No, I can swim. Um basically we're in Thailand. I believe I was Coast Samuiway, one on that little island.

SPEAKER_02 40:28

Right.

SPEAKER_06 40:28

And we were going on this little tour where we drove us out to this lovely, like blue lagoon-y looking area. Um, and they said, Right, jump out the boat, here's your snorkels, and off you go to look at all of the fish. So many fish. Anyway, I'm in there snorkeling, it was so magical. Like, I've never seen anything like it. All of the structures underneath the fish, it was phenomenal. That's rank such clear water. Um, so then there's all of us are in there. I'm like swimming away from my friends a little bit. We're all just snorkeling, it's just really nice.

SPEAKER_01 40:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 40:59

Um, and then suddenly all of the fish come targeting me. Like, I get bitten by a fish on the leg, and then I'm getting bitten more and more and more. So I start like thrashing about fuck, everyone get out of the water. There's fish are attacking. I've got the whole tourist boat has gone back into the uh like you've made out that there's piranhas. Yeah, like I some people are still out there, I am being dramatic. But a lot of people then went back in and I get to the boat and I'm I put my arm on the boat to get back up. Two guides are standing there pissing themselves. They've been chucking food in for the fish. So the fish have been eating the food and accidentally biting me in the do so. Um, but it was all yeah, all intentional. They wanted more fish to come to us so we can see them all. Um, and they were laughing at my panic.

SPEAKER_01 41:47

No, I mean I'd be panicked, I wouldn't have even got in.

SPEAKER_06 41:49

No, so and then they made us um we went to the uh this other little like lagoonie bit, and we had to go on top of the boat and then jump off into the water. No, but oh my god, it was so salty, my testicles became ovaries, like they went whoop all the way. It's salty, or like I don't know what it is. I don't know if anyone else shares this, any other testicle owners. Um if you wear like netty swim shorts and go in like salty water, my little ones um like shrivel up and get so painful and sore, and then the net like rubs on it and it's really painful.

SPEAKER_01 42:23

Oh yeah, yeah, horrible.

SPEAKER_06 42:24

It's why like a little speedo is the way forward.

SPEAKER_01 42:27

No, I'm not walking around Barcelona with you and speedoes.

SPEAKER_06 42:31

I wear speedos.

SPEAKER_01 42:32

No, you don't.

SPEAKER_06 42:32

I'd normally do, but because I've been um a bit on the inflated side, I haven't been wearing speedoes, but now I'm um skinny. I will be wearing my speedos again.

SPEAKER_01 42:44

No, not in Barcelona, you can't in Barcelona, I will. No, I can't be on that beach. Fine, we'll go too busy. Is it sit sit just sit you? The nude speech.

SPEAKER_06 42:52

Yeah, we'll go there.

SPEAKER_01 42:52

I'm not getting nude.

SPEAKER_06 42:54

Oh no, it's not your sort of nude, it's all for us. Um one.

SPEAKER_01 42:57

Oh, why the fuck am I going?

SPEAKER_06 42:58

Oh, so you can go see all the little twinks willies.

SPEAKER_01 43:01

I'm okay. Oh, fine.

SPEAKER_06 43:04

So yeah, that was my um horrific uh scuba diving, not scuba diving, snorkeling.

SPEAKER_01 43:09

Well, and that was cli, click, click clitoris, coast counties. So we'll be going to Dunwich, and that will be featured on the next episode.

SPEAKER_06 43:18

Next episode, tune in for some snippets from that. Episode 11, it was episode 11. Yes. So I've got a thread. Oh, I'll just pull it. Let's see what happens. Oh Lord Lordy, Lordy, Lord. So we're approaching the end of our episode.

SPEAKER_01 43:36

Not quite. Not quite because shall we take a peruse through our paranormal playback. Uh paranormal playback.

SPEAKER_06 43:50

We don't like Sega, don't we?

SPEAKER_01 43:52

Sega.

SPEAKER_06 43:54

Yeah, I love it when you do that. Um, let me take my glove off again. So while you're finding it.

SPEAKER_01 43:59

Oh, I'm not a On the I'm on the camera.

SPEAKER_06 44:01

Oh, well, can you um get the game up, please?

SPEAKER_01 44:03

Because my lashes off. I know it was.

SPEAKER_06 44:05

Oh, awkward. Um, good thing it's that side. We can't see that side. So, um, this game, I I'll be honest, you did slip up, and I didn't know we were doing a Black Shuck episode. You accidentally told me. You didn't tell me where we were going, though. No, but I did know it's Black Shuck. So I have written a game. Obviously, I'm experimenting with my writing of stories, and I thought I'd make a game heavily inspired by books I used to read when I was a kid. Um, and that was like a choose your own journey sort of book.

SPEAKER_01 44:34

I like the fantastic, I can't remember what they were called.

SPEAKER_06 44:38

Along them lines. So a choose your own horror story. I've got some background for you.

SPEAKER_00 44:44

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 44:45

So Dunwich, Suffolk. I've started like that. The seafog rolls inland as midnight approaches. You stand near the ruins of Greyfriars Prairie. The village is silent apart from crashing waves. Then you hear it. A deep bark. One bark, then another. The sound echoes through the mist. Locals call it the black shuck, a gigantic black dog with burning red eyes. Some claim it as a deaf omen, others believe it guards ancient secrets buried beneath Donitch. The barking sounds closer. Do you A walk towards the barking? B enter the prairie ruins. Or C follow strange footprints you've noticed on the beach.

SPEAKER_01 45:34

So I'm gonna enter the the front enter the prairie? Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 45:40

Okay. So the ruined church is silent. Moonlight shines through the broken roof. An ancient staircase descends uh no an ancient staircase descends beneath the altar. Do you go downstairs? Search the pews or ring the bell.

SPEAKER_01 46:05

Oh my god, well I don't know. Search the pews.

SPEAKER_06 46:11

Search the pews.

unknown 46:12

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 46:13

I'm not going down those fucking weird stairs.

SPEAKER_06 46:15

No, fuck that. Among the pews, you discover an old journal. The final entry was written tonight. Do you read it or burn it?

SPEAKER_01 46:27

Well I'd read it.

SPEAKER_06 46:28

Read it?

SPEAKER_01 46:29

Yeah, I'd have to read it. I love a journal.

SPEAKER_06 46:33

So you're outcome. The journal describes everything you did tonight. The final page is blank. And you survived.

SPEAKER_01 46:43

Oh!

SPEAKER_06 46:44

I know. You survived! You survived!

SPEAKER_01 46:47

Stop it! Incredible. Oh my god. Incredible. Impeccable, impeccable, impeccable. It's because the horror film that we were making, they didn't want to kill the lesbian first.

SPEAKER_06 46:56

They didn't because of um we need the obviously diversity quota to be filled.

SPEAKER_01 47:01

And it was released in June.

SPEAKER_06 47:02

It was, it was indeed.

SPEAKER_01 47:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 47:04

So would you like to go again?

SPEAKER_01 47:06

But I've survived.

SPEAKER_06 47:08

Yeah, but we're we're going again. Okay. So um so the black shuck, do you? Um the barking sounds closer.

SPEAKER_01 47:16

Okay, so I'm gonna for this one, I'm gonna follow the footprints.

SPEAKER_06 47:20

So you're not walking towards the barking, you're not entering the prairie, you're walk following strange footprints on the beach.

SPEAKER_01 47:26

Yeah, I'm gonna do that. See what goes on here.

SPEAKER_06 47:30

The track, the tracks lead along the beach. Soon they divide. Human footprints head towards the cliffs, dog prints heads towards the sea caves. Do you follow the human footprints? The dog footprints or follow a bit of both.

SPEAKER_01 47:50

I mean, I'd follow the human over the dog.

SPEAKER_06 47:53

Yeah, I agree. So you spot a child carrying a lantern. The child never turns around. Would you speak or would you follow silently?

SPEAKER_01 48:03

Oh well no, I'd walk away. Um I'm gonna follow silently.

SPEAKER_04 48:11

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 48:12

Makes me sound like a nonce. It does.

SPEAKER_06 48:16

So okay. Um, so you're ending. Oh you ready? You have the footprints become your own, and you are following yourself. The trail ends up leading you into the sea, and you follow, and you have drowned to death.

SPEAKER_01 48:34

Oh, that's not nice. I've drowned.

SPEAKER_06 48:36

Yeah, the child was an apparition. You were just delusionally following yourself.

SPEAKER_01 48:41

Oh. Well, I want to follow the black shuck now.

SPEAKER_06 48:44

Okay, so we'll follow the black shuck.

SPEAKER_01 48:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 48:46

So, um, you're going to walk towards the barking.

SPEAKER_01 48:50

Yeah, I'm walking towards the barking.

SPEAKER_06 48:52

So the fog thickens until your torch barely penetrates the darkness. Ahead stands an ancient stone cross half buried in the earth.

SPEAKER_02 48:59

Oh.

SPEAKER_06 49:00

Do you touch the cross, ignore it and continue, or leave an offering?

SPEAKER_01 49:06

Oh, I'm gonna leave an offering. That sounds fun.

SPEAKER_06 49:09

You leave a coin at the cross, the barking immediately stops. Oh when you look down, a black feather lies beside the coin. Do you take it or leave it?

SPEAKER_01 49:21

Well, I'll take it, it's like an offering to me.

SPEAKER_06 49:23

Yeah. Um, so you take the feather, the black shuck appears beside you, it never moves, it simply watches. Days later, you are found repeating, it is still behind me.

unknown 49:42

You died.

SPEAKER_01 49:43

Oh sadly. I mean, to be fair, I have I have survived. You have like these options, I've died, but I did survive first game.

SPEAKER_06 49:54

Exactly. I mean, there's a lot I've done a lot of outcomes, so this is a game we could revisit at a later point. We'll do these three for now. I um I done how many endings did I do? 30.

SPEAKER_01 50:07

Fuck me.

SPEAKER_06 50:07

Yeah, I I went for it. I was in a write, it was so fun to write because when um I was going through it, I had all of my rough ideas of what I wanted for endings.

SPEAKER_02 50:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 50:18

Um and as I was matching it all together, I just wrote down in order, so I've done it in sections, so that's why I was scrolling for ages.

SPEAKER_01 50:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 50:26

Um, because obviously I write that way down, and it was just it was so much fun. I I've probably done it in about 15 minutes.

SPEAKER_01 50:34

Not me.

SPEAKER_06 50:34

It's very quick because I got in a hole. I just went hyperphobically.

SPEAKER_01 50:37

Someone has a heavy imagination, someone's artistic.

SPEAKER_06 50:41

Fantastic. Thank you. Um, thank you, next. So, Clitor, should we close our paranormal playbook? Closed, gorgeous. I'm gonna get my glove back on.

SPEAKER_01 50:52

Oh, one, two, three, four, three, four, five, five, one, two. One psychic live. Six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Then I let it go. Why are you a six-year-old? I know.

SPEAKER_04 51:06

Six, seven, six, seven. Oh, scuba, scuba, scuba, scuba. Um, say Clitty.

SPEAKER_01 51:13

Yes. We've come to the end. Oh, we're at the end. At the end, but we do have one more thing. What is it? Cletty's cursed chant. Oh, we have a little chant. Have you got a chant? I do. I've written it about Dunnich.

SPEAKER_06 51:27

Dunnich.

SPEAKER_01 51:28

Dunnich, just ready for us to go.

SPEAKER_06 51:30

Oh, in advance. Yeah. When you try this one, I've been with you most of the time. I haven't seen you. Also, when you're at home.

SPEAKER_01 51:37

Yeah, I I do go home.

SPEAKER_06 51:38

Yeah, true. Um yeah, I just forget because we have a little a block together, don't we? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 51:45

Ready.

SPEAKER_06 51:45

Ready.

SPEAKER_01 51:47

Salt and bone, tide and sand. Hide the drowned beneath the land. Bell don't ring and waves don't part. Keep the seas black, beating heart. Mist draw near and dark abide. Bury all beneath the tide. Speak not once and speak not twice. At the third, it takes your life. Oh.

SPEAKER_04 52:15

Oh, did you come from far?

SPEAKER_01 52:20

I can be your alien superstar.

SPEAKER_04 52:24

You can shoot your DNA inside my little Milky Way. Anyway.

SPEAKER_01 52:30

Godlin's performing literally tonight in London. Oh, is it tonight? I think so.

unknown 52:34

Oh, we didn't get to go.

SPEAKER_01 52:35

No. And Mariah and Sminty and Zahanira. Zahaniura. Zahaniura. Zahira.

SPEAKER_04 52:45

Zahira. Zahaniura. Zahana. Zahira.

SPEAKER_01 52:50

Zahara.

SPEAKER_06 52:52

You're really here. I need you to be.

SPEAKER_01 52:55

I love Cena S titties and it's hee he. They're all going, ha ha. They're all going hee hee hee. And I need them to be hee he.

SPEAKER_06 53:03

Stunning. Yeah, that's it.

SPEAKER_01 53:05

Did you just look at my bingo wings?

SPEAKER_06 53:06

I did. I'm not gonna do that.

SPEAKER_01 53:09

I didn't watch your eyes go down and look at my bingo wings and go, uh. I did not go, uh you actually just said I'm fucking disgusting and I should go and die. Oh, yeah, you've gone really far. You said I should go have life and something.

SPEAKER_06 53:27

Drowned and death.

SPEAKER_01 53:28

Yeah, that's what you want me to happen.

SPEAKER_06 53:30

Yeah. So if you want to see Klitora drowned, um, do you know where you can find all of that footage?

SPEAKER_01 53:36

Where?

unknown 53:36

On the dark web.

SPEAKER_06 53:38

Oh, I can make a deep fake. We are not condoning that. No, we are not. And my I love all of this. I'm gonna I'm gonna hate how much of my pattern is hanging out of my tits. But obviously, I don't have real tits. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01 53:50

I hate how I just randomly put my leg up here and then I look at it on the videos and I'm like, look fat.

SPEAKER_06 53:54

Yeah, you hate every second of it. Gordita, gordita, gorda. Um, so Clotora.

SPEAKER_01 54:00

Yes.

SPEAKER_06 54:00

Um, what we're gonna say is we're at the end of our episode, guys. We are at the end. Thanks, that's me. Um, so if you would like to send us creepy stories, any um dreams for our every odd number episode for Boost News. Any dreams you want us to interpret? Any evidence, any fun facts, any locations, yeah, any weird sound effects you can make that I can include in the podcast, maybe some some recipes, chuck some recipes in there. Yeah, fucking send us anything, we will speak to you. So speak to us, we're lonely. I I get have I'm annoyed and I get bored having to speak to this one 24-7. Right. Entertain me. I've only got like one pal. So um I didn't say it was you. Um it is you, yeah. Send us anything.

SPEAKER_01 54:52

And if you want to email any of this um across, you can do so on our email, which is death dropdeadpod at gmail.com.

SPEAKER_06 55:01

Gorgeous. Little short snippets of videos from this episode, you will find them on Instagram and TikTok, which is Death Drop Dead underscore. And for the full chaotic video podcast, as you are seeing right now, unless you're listening, you're not seeing nothing. So I highly recommend clicking across to our YouTube, which is Death Drop Dead.

SPEAKER_01 55:24

Simply Death Drop Dead, gorgeous.

SPEAKER_06 55:27

Yes, those are our socials. So, my darling divas.

SPEAKER_01 55:32

We're done.

SPEAKER_06 55:33

We're done, we're at the end of the episode.

SPEAKER_01 55:35

So we have one last thing to say.

SPEAKER_06 55:38

Stay spooky.

SPEAKER_01 55:43

That's like strictly come dancing when they go key dancing.

SPEAKER_06 55:47

Love that. Oh my god, diva, you need to stop what you're doing. Sit back down in that chair and listen for one more minute.

SPEAKER_01 55:58

Me and Klitora are gonna play you a blooper of the week. Enjoy and stay spooky.

SPEAKER_03 56:10

That's me. Who's me?

SPEAKER_01 56:11

How do you say it's me? Well, I know how to say it's me in English.

SPEAKER_03 56:18

That's true.

SPEAKER_01 56:20

It meant Spanish, like it's dummy. That's French.

SPEAKER_03 56:26

Ces moi.

SPEAKER_01 56:27

S'moi.

SPEAKER_03 56:28

S'emois.

SPEAKER_01 56:29

C'est moi. Voulez-vous coucher ses mois? Avec moi, first with me.

SPEAKER_06 56:33

That's embarrassing that you've got that wrong. And um, it is a lesbian anthem, and I'm just gonna say