Then & Now

In this heartfelt episode, we take a deeper look into the journey of a mother and daughter then and now. From the way we were raised to the women we’ve become, we open up about the lessons, struggles, growth, and love that shaped our bond.

We reflect on our upbringing, the values that were instilled in us, and how those experiences influenced our perspectives on life, relationships, and ourselves. You’ll hear both sides the mother’s intentions and sacrifices, and the daughter’s reality and interpretation creating an honest and meaningful conversation.

This episode is about growth, understanding, and evolution. It’s about recognizing where we came from, how it impacted us, and how we continue to grow individually and together.

Two voices. Two perspectives. One story still being written.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Welcome to the Bond Beyond. A mother-daughter podcast where real conversations, real love, and real life meet.

SPEAKER_01 0:12

I'm Rashida. I'm Task Today. Here we talk about the Bond that goes beyond generations, beyond expectation, and beyond words. Welcome to this podcast. So we're going to be discussing then and now.

SPEAKER_00 0:26

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

Then and now. So obviously, we are mother-daughter. We have an age gap, of course. So the then and now with everything, just with growing up, how we were raised, and whatever we want to discuss with the then and now. So period. Oh my goodness. Alright. So obviously, um, Tassie is my daughter. She has two brothers, so the three of them were all raised together. Um, my mom herself was a single mother, so it's no, it's not something I wanted to do that I signed up for, but it was a blessing. They are a blessing, they were a blessing. Well, thank you, mom. You're welcome.

SPEAKER_00 1:06

Uh I'm her favorite. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:11

I say that she's my favorite daughter, and then I have two sons, so I say my oldest is my favorite oldest son, and then my youngest is my favorite youngest son. That's how I do it. I don't think I've ever said to them, maybe I have, who knows? You know what? You're really my favorite. Um, but like I said, my mother was a single mom, so then I became a single mom. I raised them differently, so they aren't single parents. I do not have any grandchildren yet. I'm 47, I'll be 48 this year. It's 2026. Um, I do want to be a grandparent in my 50s, even if I'm 59, I'm okay with that. But I did not want them to follow the path my mother did and that I did because it was a struggle. Um, nothing was easy about it um at all whatsoever. So that that was the then for me.

SPEAKER_00 2:05

I would say for me, I don't really remember being the only child. It felt like a minute, but it was actually five years. So like I don't know. Well it's hard because like seeing other kids have both parents in their lives, it was kind of hard for me because like I couldn't talk to my father or like ask him certain things. So I guess too, like just having you, that's all I knew. And that's really still all I know at 27 years old. So like I enjoyed my life. I never complained. I don't think I've ever complained.

SPEAKER_01 2:44

No, about your siblings, of course. Oh, of course, they're they're annoying, yeah. But no, nothing that I can say that you complained about, just in general.

SPEAKER_00 2:53

So yeah, I got everything I asked for all the time Christmas, birthdays. I was in every sport I wanted to be in.

SPEAKER_01 3:00

Except when you were two, because that's when you slap me in the face. I have to find VHS. So you know the old school, you would hold the camera, record, put on a little tripod. Um, so this is 2001. It's Christmas, and her and her father and I are together at that time. She's opening gifts, and there's a doll. She wanted a doll. She's two. She can't specify what doll, what brand. I don't know. I got a doll. I thought I did well. I have to find that video. So, mommy, mommy. I was like, yeah, thinking she's gonna give me a hug because she wants me to come closer to her. No, this little tearl slaps me right across the face. It's not the doll I wanted, and runs to her room. I don't even remember that. I'll never forget it. Never ever ever forget it. But yeah, other than that, she probably got all that she asked for and wanted to a limit. That was the one thing, too. Um, I will say this back then, thank God for layaway. I was in Kidding with her doing the layaways and everything. That's how a lot of things, that's how they got their Christmases and maybe birthdays and things like that. Now we have Afterpay. After pay, Klarna, whatever that's called. And so it's just so funny. But yeah, thank God for layaway because as a single mom, that allowed me to get the things that they needed. They weren't name brand kids.

SPEAKER_00 4:22

Mm-mm. I did not care less. People in school, you get made fun of for not having like their new sneakers that just came out or the new like clothes or whatever, but I didn't care. I'm like, everything dies down.

SPEAKER_01 4:35

It it does. Nothing really stays. The only thing that stays are Nikes. It's the only thing I can think that has stayed around. So yeah. Um, I will say this for me. I'm an only child with my single mom. Excuse me. And um, it was, you know, fine and all. I had a lot of friends, and I think that's why I have a lot of friends now because I don't have the brothers or sisters um to call on, to bug, or to just do anything. But I'm glad that they have each other, the three of them.

SPEAKER_00 5:04

Yeah, I was actually annoying Michael today.

SPEAKER_01 5:07

Whether it's a good day or a bad day, as she just said. Um, but they still have each other. They can relate to each other, they can reminisce with each other, you know, they can talk to each other, argue with each other, whatever. But I've never had that camaraderie or anything like that before because I I didn't have any siblings. So at times I miss it, especially when it came to gifting my mom. Like, oh, I wish I had someone to split things with. Um, and at times I wish that I had someone to clown around with, vacation with, and things like that. So I'm glad that I did have your brothers um to, you know, keep you entertained, occupied, and never bored.

SPEAKER_00 5:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:46

Definitely say you're never bored.

SPEAKER_00 5:48

Like then, like, we shared a room and I didn't mind that. I actually loved it because like we could talk at night, we're in bed, tell jokes and stuff, like share our day. Yes. And like we we always played, oh my god. So Amo and Michael love this every time we bring it up. And I was like, you guys remember that game we used to play at night when mom told us to go to bed? And so it's called Slid the Sloth because in Ice Age, you know how they're on the ice and Slid the Sloth gets stuck in the water, so they're trying to help him. Okay. Um, so we turned it into a game where we like, because we had bunk beds then. Yes, and so we like tucked the blankets like in the poles of the bunk bed, and we would like swing and like slide, and we used the top mattress to like bring down, and so we would slide off of it like we were in the ice age. Oh god, it was so fun. Like, if you ask Michael or email, they'll be like, Oh my god, yes! Like, that's something that I enjoyed. Like, did you guys ever get hurt doing that?

SPEAKER_01 6:50

No. Oh, okay. Well, that's good. I was sleep knocked out or just in my room. That's so funny.

SPEAKER_00 6:54

Yeah, like there's certain things that we always did, like, so I enjoyed that, but also too, I enjoyed that I didn't have to share my stuff really because I was the only girl, so like yeah, I didn't have my sister stealing my clothes and not asking or like perfumes and stuff because I didn't I didn't live with my sisters, so I don't think the boys ever took each other's things.

SPEAKER_01 7:16

No, because of the age different clothes size-wise, they couldn't do that.

SPEAKER_00 7:20

No, yeah, so they're like with toys and stuff, that's mine. I was playing with it, yeah. But then you know, all kids, if you're playing with their toy while you're at their house, they want it, even though they never touch it while they're there, yeah. They only want it because someone else is touching it.

SPEAKER_01 7:34

So even still till now, people kids still do that, and I think that's hilarious. Like, no, you can't touch it. Because we never did that, we always played together, yeah. Yeah, I I understand. Um, and so the other thing is too, like for me, for the then and now, like we all of you as adults, the youngest is 19, we can talk, we can have conversations. Yes, there's nothing, yeah, there's nothing like hidden or anything like that. If we're upset with each other, we'll express that. If we don't like what some the other person is doing, we'll express that. Even me as a mom, if I'm wrong, I'm always asking for forgiveness. I apologize if I'm incorrect. That's not something that I grew up with. If you were older than that person and elder as they called it, they were always right. Even if they're wrong, they were always right. And that's how I grew up, and that bothered me, and I did not want to do that with you all. If I'm I'm human, yeah, so if I'm wrong, I'm wrong, I'm gonna apologize. We all make mistakes. We do, we all make mistakes. And the other thing, too, is I feel like I you guys did you guys did and do very minimum in the house, obviously, for the ones who still live here and things like that. Only because, yes, we need your help. Everyone lives here, so we all have to do our part. Yes, but two, giving you a lot of freedom and things like that. Um, obviously, Michael being the youngest, he had more freedom, as you mentioned. Yeah, you let him drive your car more than I could ever drive your car. Exactly. If I drove your car, you need to find a ride here or use Uber and go here. You need to ask someone to take it. Well, there was no Uber then, really. Not really, but like find a ride. Or if you use my car to get gas.

SPEAKER_00 9:08

I used Uber once, though.

SPEAKER_01 9:10

Okay, but then I thought about it too. I was like, because I was a single mom, so if you're driving my car and using my gas, I need the gas money. Yeah, and I gave you the gas. And you did, and you did the difference with Michael. I'm now married, you know, there's more than one car. And there's more than one car, so yeah. Yeah, he's living his best life. The oldest, the I feel like the oldest sibling always has to set the standard. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 9:31

And like the parents are always more strict with the first one, yeah. And like more like, oh, you can't do this, you can't do that. But like you were never really like that with me. Yeah. But I feel like like the driving, your car and stuff to go places. I had to ask most Andrew let me use his car more than you did. Oh, that's funny. Because like I would go to the movies with friends, stuff like that. I would always ask him, but like, yeah, you were stingy with that. And then Michael, he uses it all the time. So I kind of feel jealous about that. But other than that, like, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:00

Well, then they compare to you. Oh, you went to Mexico, you get to all these trips. I'm like, So you went to Mexico as a teenager, you got your um first MacBook, yes, and then you got the camera. Those are the three things they would all always bring up. But they didn't ask for those. I was like, well, you guys aren't asking for that stuff, but then the things that they would ask for, like the material things, like clothing-wise shoes, the middle one, Emil, he was truly, truly into name brand stuff. He wanted the Yeezys when they were very popular, they were the ugliest shoes ever and still are. But um, he wanted those, they were very popular, but they were like four or five hundred dollars. I was a pain that for shoes when they're gonna end up getting ruined, you're gonna grow out of them. Like I just couldn't do it. But they did compare. There's a lot of comparison, and that's a thing. I don't understand the comparison. I don't I don't grow up, I didn't grow up with siblings, so I don't understand that. The other thing, I remember when you guys were small, there was a pencil. I don't know, and it was everyone's pencil.

SPEAKER_00 10:59

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 11:00

But I can get another pencil. I don't want that pencil, I want that one. Why they have my pencil? I was like, are we seriously arguing over a pencil? Because you all had to do your work. I was like, you sit down at the home table. That was the worst. Yes, you had to do your work. Probably the most time we've argued. Yes, during that time. During that time, and it was all about a pencil the one time, and I just I couldn't believe it. I didn't understand it. There was more pencils, but that was whoever's pencil, and they want you wanted that one, and then the other one I guess felt left out. So let me chime in and argue about the pencil too. Yeah, I'll never, I'll just never understand that, you know, only because I've never experienced it. But I think once I have grandchildren, there's more than one, they'll be cousins, they'll have their moments. But I feel like I'll be prepared for the unnecessariness in the arguments and things like that.

SPEAKER_00 11:48

Could you always just say, you're older, be the bigger person?

SPEAKER_01 11:51

I'm like, no, but they're wrong.

SPEAKER_00 11:53

Like, correct him.

SPEAKER_01 11:54

He's wrong. I'm right. You would I would say that. Like, you need to set an example. Yeah. You're the older sister. I'm like, no, but he's wrong. He cannot be getting away with what he just said. Yes, yes, yes, yes. I do remember that. That's yeah, because just before before Michael was born, the word shut up was a bad word. Yes. And then once he started talking, he we all all said, all said it. Shut up, shut up, shut up, because he would not shut up. Once he started talking, but yeah, the S word was a very bad word, which is so, so funny. So so funny. But there, I mean, there's amazing times. I made sure I have a friend. She's got the hookup, Ocean City, Maryland. Oh, yeah. So that we could have our um annual vacations at the beach, so which was really, really good. Um, and going down there for gosh, 15 years, 15 plus years, I'm gonna say summers. It became like a second home. Yes. Like if you guys go down now, you know what's on what block and all those things. Um, it's really hard too, as you guys get older, older, but this is the now, that trying to do family vacations. I wonder if anybody who's listening, if you have adult children and you tr used to do a yearly thing, how easy it is it for you now to do that yearly thing? Because now I'm finding difficulties, you know. My children are in relationships or their work schedules or just whatever. So that's the part that I'll miss. We won't be doing one this year as a family. We did one last winter, which was fine, but everybody came at different times, left for different times, so that's something I definitely have to get used to. We're gonna try again next year to see how it works out. But yeah, that's it's that definitely, I think that's my saddest. I I want everyone to be free and to leave. I'll never be an empty nester because I'm married, and that's my whole thing. Empty nester to me is I get it, they say the kids have left the nest, but I still have a husband, it's not empty. The nest is still here. I gotta take care of him too someday. So to me, it's still not empty. But I want that. But the one thing that I truly I'll never be empty. Yeah, I'll never be. The one thing that I truly will probably start missing is those family vacations because it was a yearly thing. Yeah, and we were always there. Everybody could do it, especially when you were in college, you could come home and do that. So I think if anything, that'd be the part that I missed the most. I don't miss the sports. We were cut short for Amy's track season because of COVID, but you did cheer, which went into volleyball. Yes. Um, Michael did a little bit of everything, but once he got to middle school, he kind of dwindled down. He really wasn't into the sports, which was fine. Yeah. Um, Amel went all the way into high school, 10th grade is when COVID happened, and we were done with the sports, but those early mornings, those trying to find other rides, you know, not making friends with other parents on the same team, but at least being cordial and associates so your kid can ride with them with the carpooling. Everybody's like, oh, when it's over, you'll miss it. Rashida doesn't miss it. I don't miss it at all, at all, at all. I just, I really, I really, really don't miss it at all.

SPEAKER_00 15:02

I like the busyness, but I'm busy now with other things.

SPEAKER_01 15:05

Oh, yeah, that's what I'm saying. I'm already busy with other things. So, like that part of me, you know, being the parent and doing all those things, I I don't miss that part. Um, I'm looking forward to I try to go and support my uh friends' kids that are in things, maybe still in college, or who knows, it could be middle school, high school, whatever. Um, still go and support them because I don't feel obligated to have to be in every game. Um, because sometimes with the kids I would miss it because I need to be with Amy all at baseball and Tasse's got play practice, or she's got a cheer comp and I can't get there. Like it was it was a lot. It was a lot, a lot, a lot of early mornings, a lot of late nights, a lot of long weekends. So, like, I was glad that you guys were able to do that. At one point, you were in travel cheer. Michael was in travel cheer. Yes, that was fun. Yeah, that was the only travel thing that we did as a family, yeah. Um, but yeah, so yeah, I don't I don't miss those times.

SPEAKER_00 16:04

Well, I was coaching Michael, that's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 16:06

Yes, yes, because you did it for a year and then you end up coaching the next year. So yeah, so no, it was those were some days, I tell you. And it just sitting here like thinking about it, you're like, wow, like just how the time it goes fast. If you have little ones, like cherish all the moments, yes, because it goes fast, and take the pictures and write it down if you're the type to write things down. Try to keep those keepsakes and all that stuff because videos, all of it. It's crazy, it's crazy, it's crazy. I'm a person who likes to keep cards. Um, I need to figure out what to do with my cards. And you pretty much still have all of our baby stuff from back then, but mostly my stuff, yeah. Yes, everything is in the bed. I will say this all three of you are in one bin. It's one of the large, uh long bins, but all three are in one bin with all the stuff. But yeah, cherish all those moments because sitting here and talking about the then and now, like that's crazy to think about how little everybody was and all the things. That like, yeah, that's crazy. And I have adult children now.

SPEAKER_00 17:14

I kind of got a little bit emotional when I was driving in um D Town, Downytown earlier this weekend, because all the little little boys in their little baseball t-ball uniforms. I'm like, oh Amo Michael used to wear those. Yes, so like, and then they're all smiling, just happy, so so lovely.

SPEAKER_01 17:35

Such a throwback. It's crazy. That, yeah, that is crazy. Yeah, that went by fast though. It goes, it does, it goes by very, very fast. Like, I'm just thinking of all the different things, all the different stages and things like that. Yeah, insane. And two, like you and Emil growing up with no technology, like you guys didn't have devices. No, there was no iPad for you. Um, we did have um, I had to purchase the DVD player for the vehicle to go behind the to go behind the headrest of the driver passenger. I don't know if I had two screens of prior to F1. Oh, I didn't have to. Oh, okay. I'm like, Michael broke them. He didn't break those. He what's it called? He broke them? Okay, alright. Michael breaks a lot of things and still does to this day. But yeah, so you guys didn't have devices to walk around with. You didn't have any type of mobile devices like that. So that was really, really funny. And then when I got a mobile DVD player, no, the DVD player Michael Michael left it at the baseball field and we ran back and it was gone. And the funny thing was, I had a rental from Netflix. Remember back in the day when it would come in the mail, you would go to the colour. The red box. Yes, yes. So I was so so upset. Michael, Michael, Michael. Yeah, so upset about that. But yeah, when did do you remember when you got your first cell phone?

SPEAKER_00 19:01

10.

SPEAKER_01 19:02

It was a flip, okay, the slide joint. Oh, okay. And I had to push all the buttons. Okay. Because the one had A, B, C, okay, yeah. But then we would learn that by heart, though. You wouldn't know how many times to press it to get that letter. That's too much. That's funny. So you were 10. Yeah, I have no clue when the boys got theirs. Same time because you try to make I do. I tried I what I tried to do was mimic what I did for Taciday for both of the boys. Like they didn't go to college, which is fine. Their decision, they have jobs. She went for four years, and obviously, she didn't pay as most things as a college kid would because she's in college and didn't have a full-time job. So I try to continue to do that same timeline with the boys. Some things have changed, some things have stayed. Yeah, because I'm more productive than them. So, yeah, so yeah, I try to keep it as fair as possible. So, because they are comparers. Well, Tass was what age when she did this, and who knows what they did. Well, those two are. I'm just mad about that car thing. That's all. Yeah, they're they're they're the ones that compare in what they do all the time. Is yeah, how they do it.

SPEAKER_00 20:11

Yeah, because at 16, like none of us asked for cars.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

No, like I had a party. Michael, I don't even remember what we did. Amy was uh, what's it called? Oh, yeah, we went to Bahama Breeze.

SPEAKER_00 20:25

No, that was his 21st.

SPEAKER_01 20:27

He we did a drive-thru for him.

SPEAKER_00 20:29

Oh, right.

SPEAKER_01 20:30

Because of COVID. COVID. I keep forgetting about COVID. Yeah, his year was like that. So yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to forget about COVID because that was the worst time. Yeah. Well, the sickness part was the worst, but I enjoyed the unplugging and just being home and doing nothing. I did enjoy that. I truly did. Being in the house, put up with your whole family is something different. It is something like when you can't go anywhere else and you're stuck with them 24-7, it's something different. And two, I was literally doing school.

SPEAKER_00 21:01

You were in my bed.

SPEAKER_01 21:02

Yeah, you were in college. That was annoying. You could have got up and went on the couch, but it's all good. Yeah, but then they wanted my camera on and all this stuff, they changed the rules. Um, so yeah, now Emil did we just had people drop things off for his 16th. And then Michael, we didn't do anything. They're not the party kids. That's what the limelight is.

SPEAKER_00 21:26

I want everybody to celebrate me. Just how I celebrate everybody else.

SPEAKER_01 21:31

I want my whole cheer squad behind me on my birthday. That's that's her. That that is her for sure. She needs what are we doing? Where are we going? We like to celebrate all month. Yes, maybe all year actually. Yes, but that that is her. That is her. But the boys could care less. You you don't you never know your last day on earth.

SPEAKER_00 21:52

You gotta celebrate every chance you can get.

SPEAKER_01 21:54

But they celebrate it, but in a different way. Your celebration is a party or a location.

SPEAKER_00 21:58

Oh, yeah, everybody.

SPEAKER_01 22:00

needs to know I'm going all out for everything. Yes, that that's what your that is what your what's it called is all about. All about. So yes, yes, yes, yes. You're too funny. Do you remember your 16? No. Mom used to throw bangers too, so she can't be tied up. Yeah, I used to throw parties but not at 16. My party started when I was 21 and older. Yeah. Yeah, no, no, no, no. I don't She threw bangers, guys. Yeah. If you know her, you know she goes down for a party. Oh goodness. She knows how to plan. Yeah. But all the things. Yeah. I'm I'm going to give yourself credit. Well yeah I'm giving myself credit for that but I'm done with that. So that's where you get it from. You get it from me. You want to celebrate and you get that from me. But yeah no I don't do all that anymore. Don't do that anymore. But yeah no I don't remember what I did for my 16th or anything like that. Yeah. Yeah once I got older is when I threw my own parties or I threw parties with friends is what I did. So that is how I celebrated. So yes yes yes and yes makes it when you well when you were younger did you have any animals? Uh several I had a lot of dogs. They I mean they were family dogs. My uncle um he was a breeder so we had 14 dogs. Yeah you're like we had acres of land 14 German shepherds. Yes we did. Because then when we were younger we are never getting any animals no animals because you have to take care of them and no animals. And do you understand why I said no animals when you were younger? Yeah but I love it. I haven't complained one time having Stella I love you girl that's my best friend. Excuse me yes we have a dog now and I said yes I didn't ask anyone's permission. Nope she just brought her over the house I just brought her here and now she's staying is she lost and I started bawling my eyes out. Mom's like no she's ours I was like what you said we were never gonna get a dog because the one Christmas she gave me dog socks. Yes and tricked me thinking I was getting a dog but we didn't yeah so I'm very grateful for that. Yes we have a dog now and dogs aren't cheap. No if you don't have any animals don't get them you don't need them just go visit your friends who have the animals and you can love other animals because it's so much easier they're just like having kids so but the only thing is you can leave them behind. You don't have to take them with you can leave them home. Yes and they just sit on the couch and wait for you to come home is what they do. But yeah no growing up I had a good life my mom provided my uncle my aunt they were amazing people always helped my mom out when she needed it too good group of friends. I still have friends from elementary school middle school high school I did not go to college um so yeah yeah yeah yeah no yeah no no complaints about that because I turned out a-okay I would say it turned out a-okay and my mom would always say you're a better mother than me Ra you're doing so much better than I did and I sometimes I'd shake my head yes it's true give me that credit just to be just to be different oh and then back then well oh I have a book club that I'm in with my girls and I'm listening to a certain book um we don't talk about Carol and I'm at the part where the one she got in trouble she had to go to the yard and the girl gonna step up and get beat and get a beat and that is what my mother used to make me do. I just was like wow it is truly an African American aka black I can say it because I'm that person a black thing because my mom would make me go out in the yard and find a stick so she could beat me. Would never forget that and when she said that I was like wow I'm glad I wasn't the only one so I mean she put me in my place I put my kids in my their place too but you can't have that home can't do that now because gosh forbid when we were growing up we had my mom had a spatula in the car. So every time when she was driving we were like arguing the back seat and stuff she would just grab the spatula and just swing her arm back even though she was missing whoever was acting out and I remember too if I was ever on the phone I would snap. Oh yeah yeah because I would just snap so that you wouldn't know it's on the phone. But you can't hit your kids now or they get CPS and all extra stuff. All the things but yeah so you just gotta find other ways so that they respect you and then know that you're in charge and you're the boss. But yeah so we I had a good life um hopefully my children feel as though they had a good life growing up definitely well that you're speaking for yourself I said children. Well we can get another episode in there that'll that'll be a very interesting episode with those those two added in um but yeah so I feel like you know everyone's lives are different. Sometimes we look back and it wasn't so good. And if you're that person make sure you're seeking out getting all the guidance and help that you need you're never too old for a therapist you're never too young for a therapist I recommend it completely and fully if you're stressed or whatever the case is if you need to change some things in your life make sure you make those changes get out take a stroll a walk whatever it is but I am grateful for all the things that I was able to get and to do in my life I hope my children were grateful for all the things that they got to do and everything in their lives and I hope still to this day they know that I am their support system. They know they can reach out to me they can call me anytime when I call them they pick up um so which I'm grateful for they don't ever put me the voicemail they don't ever miss my calls or anything like that FaceTime or just you know on the phone. So I'm so so grateful for that. So yeah I will always answer. I'm so glad always so so glad no matter what yes even when I'm on the phone with somebody else I'm like hold up my mom's calling me and I put them on hold because I always gonna answer because you don't you never know. You don't you just never never know yeah you never know to always be there and to answer the call for that person. But yeah no this was this was a good one and it it made me think it made me do a deep dive also and it's gonna make me keep thinking about you know raising you guys when you were little to when you were you know teenagers going to church to the adolescents. Go to church. Oh going to church I was raised in a church I stepped away from the church because the church that I was attending since I was a single mom you know I committed a sin but God forgives us all that's what I believe and um going in with my daughter I would get looked at and things like that. So I remember that um and then my neighbor you gotta come visit my church you gotta come visit my church I was okay let me just go had all three kids Michael was four months old and stepped in there never left love love our church they're kind they're considerate they're amazing people but when they were growing up the rule was if you don't have to work on Sunday you have to go to church. Yes and then that C thing came around which Tasse doesn't like to talk about and the rules just change because it changed everybody's life yeah structure just how you do your day to day so Tasse and I are still very involved in the church.

SPEAKER_00 29:33

She's a youth leader I'm a children's ministry director so but yeah yes we love being in ministry with our church because even before I was in youth and mom was in children's ministry we served in the kitchen we did the community and we did community dinners on Wednesday nights to feed the homeless people and also our church community also came out to those nights so that was always a fun I never did not like attending church I always enjoyed church. And then I got baptized at 13 so I became more involved in like loved youth group it's just not another outlet to like build a community make friends and all those until you believe in the same thing so you can connect and have deeper conversations because when I was in school people are like oh you're a Christian I'm like yeah they're like oh okay like people try to put you in like a box but oh yeah every and everyone's different depending on what type of church you go to and how you were raised and things like that.

SPEAKER_01 30:33

Yes. My mom was a deacon so we were at church a lot of times every meeting was I remember sitting around um at the restaurant Denny's we don't have one in our area anymore but you know they would be talking and meeting and we were always there. So of course Sundays we're probably there Tuesdays for prayers Wednesdays for Bible study and maybe one day over the weekend we were there too so it's it can be a lot um but you know it just all depends how people are involved but yeah yeah yeah yeah so yeah so we love talking about the then and now going back on how she was raised how I was raised and the moments that we had together so which was awesome so until next time we want you to know that you are loved you are valued and you are never alone this is a bond beyond where connection goes deeper than words