Hard Conversations

In this episode of The Bond Beyond, we dive into the topic of hard conversations — the ones people often avoid because of fear, discomfort, pride, or uncertainty. From family tension and relationships to boundaries, forgiveness, mental health, faith, and honest communication, we unpack why these conversations matter and how avoiding them can impact the people we love most. Join us as we share personal experiences, growth, and encouragement to face difficult conversations with honesty, grace, and understanding.

Question of the Episode:
“What hard conversations do you avoid, and why?”

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to the Bond Beyond.

SPEAKER_00 0:02

A mother-daughter podcast where real conversations, real love, and real life meet.

SPEAKER_01 0:06

I'm Rashida.

SPEAKER_00 0:07

I'm Tas today.

SPEAKER_01 0:08

Here we talk about the Bond that goes beyond generations, beyond expectation, and beyond words. Our topic today is hard conversations.

SPEAKER_00 0:20

Bum bum bum.

SPEAKER_01 0:22

Hard conversations, are they? Are they really hard? Or is it just the people that we talk to about them that make it hard?

SPEAKER_00 0:30

The people.

SPEAKER_01 0:31

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 0:32

Definitely.

SPEAKER_01 0:32

Because I can there's some uncomfortable conversations, but some people might call them hard conversations. So I don't, I don't know. I don't mean to get like down to the nitty-gritty. But a hard conversation is, I'm sorry, it's such and such passed away. To me, that's the hard conversation. Other than that, where I don't like what you said to me. Or um we're gonna have chicken tonight instead of beef. Someone might get sad about that. But for me, honestly, a hard one is you're telling me a loved one or someone that I cared about has passed away. Other than that, once again, I'm built different. I know I say that a lot, but I am those conversations aren't hard for me. Maybe this is something I need to take a deeper like look at. Because maybe, because I am too honest and too blunt most days, all the time. Um maybe, I don't know. Like, I've I've tried my best. Hold on, real quick. Remember what you're gonna say. Keisha, I'm calling you out. We will go to uh restaurants and stuff, and she'll apologize for me in advance. When she did that the one time when I was like paying attention, I was like, oh. She's like, she does not mean to talk at you, she just wants to ask questions. So, like, sometimes you gotta tell me, and like I'm my feelings aren't hurt. If anything, she helped me out. So, shout out to you, Keisha, for telling the server that I might be talking at them and not like at them. It's just who I am. But I'm sorry. As soon as we sit down, we need water. No, we don't want it sparkling, we don't want it uh, what is it? Bottled. Just give me that. Just give me water. Just put the water on the table before I start coughing. Just give me water. I'm so sorry. You were gonna say something.

SPEAKER_00 2:36

Most hard conversations are like the fear of rejection. Okay. Most like when you're interested in someone and you're like, oh my god, like he's really good. Relationship. Like, oh, or she's like beautiful. Let me go talk to her. Okay. Like fear of rejection, that can be hard for people. Okay. Um, as well as like being misunderstood or like talking to your partner about a conflict that you have. Like they did something and you want to bring it up for them.

SPEAKER_01 3:06

No, see, I understand that. So that makes sense, but once again, I'm different. So to me, it's not a hard conversation. Something my husband and I do, we learned from our marriage counseling before getting married. There's something called temperature readings. So it we are supposed to do it two, three times a week, just to pause, stop, and listen to each other. So that is a time where we can bring something up. It's called request for change. So, for example, Tessa Day, I went to go make coffee the other day and you left a cura cura cure pod in there. I didn't like that you did that. Don't ever do that again. So instead of saying it that way, request for change. Hey, when you're done with the coffee, can you make sure you always take the pods out? So I do understand what you mean.

SPEAKER_00 3:54

Because it can be that might be timing and tone to a conversation.

SPEAKER_01 3:57

Correct. Yes. So that makes sense. I just need to relate to everything you're saying, like, oh, okay, I get it. Yeah. But see, that's my problem. Because some I will I'll admit it too.

SPEAKER_00 4:09

You you just go. You have no yellow. Like, you either are green all the time. Don't go to yellow, you don't slow down, or you don't stop or red.

SPEAKER_01 4:23

You just start green all the time. Green. I got something to say, and it doesn't matter who it is. I'm saying it. It could be y'all's kids at a baseball game. I'm telling your kid to sit down. And I don't care whose kid that is. That's just, but it's just who I am. And I don't mean harm by it. I don't mean to be rude. I don't mean to be disrespectful. But like if you want an honest answer, come ask me. Just just ask me because I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. And I'm gonna be honest with you. So the other thing, too, is if you're like, oh, I just talked to Taz today and she didn't understand me, and she still gets on my nerves, using that for example. So, Taz, you just had a conversation with Sally, and she just told me that you're still getting on her nerves. Like, I'm telling you. Because one, you either guys are working together, you're planning something together. Like, obviously, if you start to collaborate with that person, I'm gonna let you know what they said. Obviously, to a certain extent, only because you still haven't worked out what you worked out. Because you might think everything's great and fine. You and Sally talked, it's all good. When she's still over there, nope, still can't do it.

SPEAKER_00 5:31

Still can't stand her.

SPEAKER_01 5:32

Yep, can't work with her. So, like, I don't that's just it's just who I am. Yeah, just who I am.

SPEAKER_00 5:37

And other things just like learning to listen instead of react. I feel like most people don't want to hear you out. And they, oh no, no, well, can I finish talking? And then they it like from a calm conversation and they go all the way up here. And then you're like, okay, we're done having this conversation. Like, this is over with. We can try to come back to it another day. Yeah, but like right now, you're not hearing me. Yeah, and so I'm walking away.

SPEAKER_01 6:07

Yeah, and I like that. I would say I have more of those conversations because I work at front desk to answer phones. I have it more with strangers on the phone. If they're upset about something yelling, I am not the one who made you upset. I am talking to you calmly. So if you continue to talk to me calmly, we can figure this out together. I got it! Okay, yep. Yeah, it's not gonna work. It's not gonna work. So I do understand that. I will say that me personally, I was young when I would get in arguments and yelling and all that stuff. I don't do that anymore. I think since I became a mother, I avoid those types of conversations.

SPEAKER_00 6:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:45

Whether it be whether it's a relationship I'm in, whether it was my own mother, whoever it may be, because I didn't want you all to see that and think that that was okay. So that's why. Because can you recall how many yelling fights or whatever would happen because I wasn't dealing with it. We can have a conversation now, or we could talk about another day when we're a little bit when you're a little bit more calmer, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

SPEAKER_00 7:12

I react more when people disrespect me. Like when, like, normally I'm calm and like, okay, like, yeah, we can talk about it. Yeah. But then after we talk about it and you're still doing the thing that I didn't like, then like I start reacting because you didn't change how you were with your actions. And you said you were. Like, actions speak louder than words.

SPEAKER_01 7:37

So definitely.

SPEAKER_00 7:38

I'm in a relationship with you or ref whatever situation it is, coworkers, whatever. And I tell you something I don't like in the nicest way, hey, can you please not do that? That bothers me. Like, before I'd be like, oh my god, you're getting on my nerves. Like I already told you this, and then and then it just like it doesn't work out as a friendship or whatever, and I avoid them because you can't respect me. Why would I want to talk to you or be with you? So I'm gonna just go off my own way. Yeah, that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 8:11

And I agree with that. What that made me think of was our Enneogram numbers. Has anybody out there taken that test? We took it with our church. We love our church, and it opened up so many doors. I will say this the company I work for in my church do so many things similar. It was so scary at first when I started working there, but then I just love it because Enneograms at work, Enneograms at church, like so many different things. So, what it is, you take a test and it's a lot of questions. Yes. And after this test, it lets you know what your number is. And your number says what type of person you are, and basically how you work in different situations with other people, your life path, all the things. So, of course, her and I are two different. I am a number one, I am a reformer, I'm a nine, I'm a peacemaker. Yes, so we are two different people. Tass, you need it. Why didn't you, Mom? You know I can't. We're just so opposite with that. So sometimes it irritates me because she has not put her foot down to tell somebody something.

SPEAKER_00 9:18

Because I just love, I just love loving people. I like to give people multiple chances. Nope. And I have learned in 2026 that's not happening no more.

SPEAKER_01 9:28

No, nope. It was never that way for me. I ain't giving you multiple chances. You're one and done half of the gosh darn time, unless you're blood related. Well, not even that.

SPEAKER_00 9:37

Not even that. No, you gotta go real far for me to be one and done. Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:43

Understood. Understood. Well, here's the thing. I don't, I don't tell people they're one and done. Oh no, I just block and delete. Okay, so yeah, that's a phone. But let's say you have to interact with this person. I don't tell them that they're one and done. I just, good morning, good morning. I need help with, not a problem. I'm not asking you how your weekend was. I don't want to know how your family is doing. So here's the thing: whoever's listening knows me now. Putting it all out there and take it all in. Get your notebooks. Get your notebooks. If I'm not asking you how your weekend was, if I'm not asking you how your family was, and I'm not asking these questions, you done did something, and I didn't tell you that we were done. But we're done. If I don't interact with you in any way, like obviously, if you're not family, if you're not at my church, if you're not at my job, you know, then I'm not interacting with you a weekly, daily, monthly, yearly basis, whatever. But if we used to hang and I you used to call them text, I used to call them text, and that's not happening anymore, something done went down. That was it. Like, and I just I don't have time for it anymore. I need to protect my peace and my energy. So I don't have a problem telling people what they've done wrong, putting them in their place, but then sometimes when I tell that person that, it's not them, it's me. Because they never want to admit their mistakes. I will apologize and I will tell you if I did something wrong. Because I'm human, so it doesn't phase me. I'm not embarrassed by it, nothing. You know what? I messed up on that. Thanks for pointing that out to me. You know what? Thank you for telling me that. I'll do that next time, whatever the case may be.

SPEAKER_00 11:34

I learned that from you. Yeah. But two, I always apologize. I'm always like, sorry, even when I'm not the person who done something wrong. No. I I did that all the time.

SPEAKER_01 11:42

Yeah, I'm not apologizing when I didn't do anything wrong. So yeah, I'm good. I'm so, so good. But that is just me. So once again, come ask me a question. I'm either gonna say, you know, I'm I apologize. That is none of your business, or no, I'm not telling you, or I'm gonna tell you. Not gonna lie about it, because if I lied, I would not remember what I said to you, and I'd be making up another story along with another story. So I'm not even doing that.

SPEAKER_00 12:08

Yeah, I don't understand how people lie. Because then you gotta remember what you told that person and continue to tell the same stories. And then when you mess up a little detail, they're like, Well, you said Hold up now. Yeah. Like, why don't you just be honest?

SPEAKER_01 12:20

That's a it's a lot. It's a lot. Yeah. This one, yeah, so it's it's a lot.

SPEAKER_00 12:24

Yeah, it makes me like it boils my blood. Yeah. When like people tend to, and I guess two, I apologize because the conversation wasn't going anywhere, even when like you should be like, and it's over.

SPEAKER_01 12:40

You're like, I'm sorry, that's your it's over. Uh-huh. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:43

I'm like, okay, my apologies. I'm so sorry that happened. When it really nerve-wracking to me, like, because then two, I don't want to talk to you. And then then you act a Lulu like you didn't do anything of why I stopped talking to you. Well, why are you not talking to me anymore? Are you serious? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:59

Like, why are we having this conversation?

SPEAKER_00 13:01

Why are we having this conversation? You know what you did. Why don't you admit it?

SPEAKER_01 13:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:04

And grow like grow up hair.

SPEAKER_01 13:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:07

And just apologize.

SPEAKER_01 13:09

And I will say too that I'll ask questions. Um, if I know that I did something incorrect, should do it better the next time, whatever. How would you like me to handle this next time? Or how would you like me to approach you if there's something that you do that I don't like? Or like I'll ask if I love you enough. I want it to work out. I'm trying to figure it out. I'm trying to handle it. So when I ask you those questions, I'm not being smart or I'm not, you know, being deciphered or anything like that. Like, I really want to learn and learn you because we're all different, and two people change.

SPEAKER_00 13:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:46

I've been married come seven years. That's it. Just seven? Yeah, just seven this year. And if let's say I do something, it didn't bother him before, and now it bothers him now. Like, I want him to be able to tell me that. And I'm not gonna like, well, and it didn't bother you before, so why is it bothering you now? No, people change because people change, so that's okay. Like you might have thought it was funny one time or whatever the case may be, or maybe I wouldn't listen to you. If I am not listening, if you hear me say the word, okay, okay, I am not listening. Because, and two, I'm like, I apologize, I was not listening. Can you please repeat that? Or if I truly want to learn and understand that person, I'm like, okay, so you just said when I say this word, it triggers you and it brings up bad this. So you're asking me not to say it again. Is that correct? Yes, that's correct. Awesome, great, exactly. So I make sure I don't do that or say that to that person again because I want them to know that I love them, that I'm here to understand them, and things like that. So these hard conversations can go so many different ways, forms, they can come at you and be around you and just all those things in completely different formats.

SPEAKER_00 14:57

Yeah, I feel like it's harder when you love someone so much, yeah, because like it makes it more difficult, but also it probably makes it easier if you guys can actually talk about it and be on the same page. Because then two, it makes the relationship stronger, yes, and you it lasts longer. I agree. I feel like most like most people just hold like or or they like go and find someone else, or they start doing stuff behind their partner's back. Even at a young age, if you're in a relationship, you should be solid with that person. Yes. If something they're doing bothers you, talk to them about it. Because you're not gonna be with your parents for the rest of your life, you're gonna be with a partner, yes, unless you want to be single forever. However, you want to live your life. But most of the time when you're with someone, yes, you should be completely honest with them. If you're not feeling them anymore, break up with them.

SPEAKER_01 15:56

So, funny thing is, social media is a really big thing, and there is a group that I'm on, not gonna say the name of the group, but there are several females that get on there and ask advice about the relationship they are in in their home. How do we, on the outside, not even looking in or know who you are because you've already posted anonymous? How are we supposed to help you? One, we're not your therapist, two, we're not your god, three, we're not the person that you're in the relationship with.

SPEAKER_00 16:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:31

One, obviously, if you're in a relationship that is endangering you and any children in the home, get out. Don't post about it. Get out. Have you seen that movie? Not in that form of function. But get out of that home because no one deserves to be treated that way, regardless. No one should put their hands on you, no one should be verbally abusing you or belittling you andor your children or the children in the home. So, but my whole thing is I got married at age 41 and so grateful for that because I got to learn myself truly, completely, and fully. I was blessed to have three children before then. But I will say, if I got married at 41 and had no kids, Rashida still would have had no kids. Um, because I was not starting at 41. I'd say that much. No, no, no. Excuse me, but in doing so, it is so important that that person, one, asked you for your hand in marriage. One, number two, you then said yes. Everything's great, life is great, everything is good. Here comes baby number one. Things, you know, changed a little. You're, you know, not sure. Oh, the spark is back. Oh, here comes baby number two. Like all these different things, and then it just it just crumbles. Like, find what put you guys together if you can, and if not, just part your ways. Please stop going on social media and asking the world what you should do about your relationship that nobody's in.

SPEAKER_00 18:03

And I think too, I think because when before you had kids, even though I'm single, in my experience of seeing other people's relationships and how successful they are, yeah, they say that they continue to date each other even when they have kids. Like take the time to still be one-on-one with your partner, spouse, whoever, yes, and still date them.

SPEAKER_01 18:24

You can have those conversations then and talk about those things. That person's supposed to be your best friend. They are supposed to be your best friend. So, back to some more hard conversations. I know we we kind of got off track because we were flown with that. Yeah. So I don't mind helping others, guiding them, and helping them with their conversations. It's so funny. That's the one thing. Tasse and I, I don't know, we have something about us. We could see a stranger in a store and say hello. Oh, hello to you too. Let me tell you how the other day Peter did this and that. We're like, what? Oh, I told you hi. So this person, what is happening right now? I just came in to get three things and they're holding me up. And oh, okay. And that's here's the thing. This is where I'm not rude, and like, I gotta go. Because that person needed me for that purpose and that reason. They couldn't have that hard conversation with Peter, so they're having it with me. I'm a complete stranger, and all I said was hello or excuse me to get past the aisle. But that part is so funny with people, they see us and like, oh, I can tell her, I can conversate her. Tasse and I combined together, we probably have a million and one secrets from other people that told us. Yes. And my brain hurts sometimes. I'm like, and my I'm sometimes I want to shake my head, like, please don't tell me. I don't want to know, please don't tell me. Oh, they're telling me. Why are they telling me? Like just in my head. I'm grateful that I can be that person for people.

SPEAKER_00 19:50

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 19:51

I don't need that person because sometimes I feel like when people come to you with so much, you then need that person to go to with so much. But I don't need that person. I have my husband that I can speak with, I have my daughter who I can speak with, I have an amazing set of friends that I can speak with. But some people don't have anybody, especially the ones that have a lot of secrets. Yes, especially people who live alone too. We want people to have those conversations, hard, bad, good, and different. But if that person lives alone and someone pissed them off, they're going home to nobody.

SPEAKER_00 20:23

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 20:24

So, like, who are they telling? So then Tasse and I become those people.

SPEAKER_00 20:27

And I run into people in the store. Yeah. Even like like people I've haven't seen in years. Yeah. They're like, hey Tass. I'm like, hey, how are you? They're like, good. Yo, this happened to me the other day. Like, this one guy was like, he's sharing his whole time. He got in a car accident, he lost his job, and I was looking for another job. I was like, okay, I'm so sorry that happened to you. Like, but it's good to see you because I haven't even started shopping yet. So I was like, so good to see you. Like, I'll be praying for you. And I keep it moving. I'm just I just feel like we're, since we're so open and loving to everyone who sees us, like, they're like, oh my god, like you listen. Like, I think people too don't have a lot of listeners in the eyes.

SPEAKER_01 21:05

Yeah, because we're we listen.

SPEAKER_00 21:06

Because there was a why'd you do that? You shouldn't have done like people just react to what people are telling them instead of just like, oh, okay, I'm sorry it happened to you. Yeah. Like, whatever you need, I'm here.

SPEAKER_01 21:16

Have a talking stick. If you have a large family, a lot of kids, and I don't know. Do you here's a question for our listeners? Do you guys sit around your kitchen or dining room table and have conversations either with your spouse, your partner, your children if they're of age? I know that I wouldn't say hard conversation, but just conversation in general.

SPEAKER_00 21:35

What is your rose and your thorn of the day? You would ask us that at dinner every night.

SPEAKER_01 21:40

Every night we would sit at a table, we would have dinner, and I'd ask all three. Your rose. So the rose is the best thing that happened in their day. And the thorn to them is the worst thing that happened in their day. So I would even have those conversations with my children, even when I was a single mom, because I want to know how they're doing. I want to check in on them. I want to make sure that they're doing okay. I want to make sure that they're okay. Okay, um, you know, because I love them and care for them, always checking in on them. And okay, because when I say okay, I'm not listening, but okay, okay was not a good enough answer when I would ask them, how was your day? It was okay. Nope. I want more than that. Like, what did you do? Who did you see today? What did you work on? What did you have for lunch? What did you have for lunch? Like, I want a full conversation. Okay, wasn't enough for me or anything like that. So I made them speak up and speak out so they can have those hard conversations because even though I'm asking them maybe the littlest questions, it allows them to ask those questions to other people. Yes, they can learn from that. And if my child is not a talker, like Tasse and I could be, then my other child can just start out a small conversation. So, what was your rose today? And that friend would be like, What's a rose? They can explain it to them. That starts that conversation, and maybe it ends up growing into something even more beautiful for them.

SPEAKER_00 22:55

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 22:55

But you know, I do, I do remember that. So yeah, that was fun. Um, I'll ask all the questions, also too, because that's how we learn and that's how we teach and that's how we grow. So if you once again, if maybe someone said that they didn't like what you said or something was done that didn't like what you did, that's when you ask the questions and that's where you grow and make yourself better and stronger. And it really helps to repeat what they said. So one, you've comprehended it, you've listened, so that you don't go and say that again to upset them or any way whatsoever from that. So that's really, really important. Sometimes there could be some challenges, um, and I might need my own personal help.

unknown 23:36

That's what a therapist is for.

SPEAKER_01 23:39

Um, don't be embarrassed or ashamed to be in therapy, go see a therapist, psychiatrist, whatever it may be. Um, I encourage it with everybody because some people need an outlet. Sometimes your mother cannot be your outlet, your spouse, your partner cannot be your outlet, your best friend, whoever that may be, cannot be your outlet. Because, too, you have to think about it. Whatever you're talking about, you know, the good, the bad, or whatever, if it's more negative, you're bringing all that negative to that person.

SPEAKER_00 24:09

And then they're getting a negative narrative of your spouse. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:12

Or whoever it may be. Yes. And then that's not right for that person that you may be talking about. Or maybe every time you're around them, all you ever bring up is all the things bad going in your life. I'm like, okay, this is making me miserable every time I talk, like to this person. So I don't want to do that. So make sure that if you need the help, seek the help. I know we live in America, yeah, and there's a lot of therapists that don't take insurance, but reach out and see how you could get that help because in any way, shape, or form, that's always the best way to do it.

SPEAKER_00 24:45

Yeah, because my next point was mental health and grief. Like losing a parent or losing a kid that can come into your relationship and learning how to do it. Or losing a spouse. Or spouse.

SPEAKER_01 24:56

Yeah. Yeah, because that's really, really hard. Um, because some people don't want to talk about that and they allow that to drag on. That was the the second time I went to therapy when my mother passed away. Because not that I didn't understand it, I just had so many unanswered questions. Yes. It was just like full of anger with some things, frustration, and needed to know how to balance all that out. Because that was no one's fault. If if, you know, even my own as an adult. But my mom wasn't, my mom is nothing like me. If you asked her a question, she'd find 20 other ways to answer it without answering it. But if you asked me a question, I would answer it. Love her, God rest her soul. But I think too, growing up, that was hard for me because maybe that's why the way I am now, asking the question so I can understand a person, being real and truthful with people. So you you know it, you either take it or leave it, whatever it may be, because I didn't get that as an adolescent or growing up or even adulthood. Still, her and I couldn't have adult to adult conversations. You and I can have adult-to-adult conversations. So I made sure I changed those dynamics so no one would feel left behind, no one would feel empty, no one would feel out of place because most times I felt that way. I was an only child growing up. It was my mother and I in the church family. Uh, my aunt, God rest her soul, um, my uncle Tony, love him. He's in Florida, where she was right here next to me. Um, it was always those three. I was with my mom, Aunt Jackie, Uncle Tony. Mom, Aunt Jackie, Uncle Tony. Like those were the three I was always around. So, and got spoiled by Aunt Jackie and Uncle Tony tremendously, which got on my mother's nerves. Um, but I could have conversations with them and ask them questions.

SPEAKER_00 26:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:42

But if I wanted to have those same conversations with my mom, not that it was forbidden, once again, she would just answer, but not answer the question. She would do other things. So the dynamic is like so broad. Yes, so, so broad with conversations. Like everyone is different with it. But like I said, if you if you're looking for a real answer, I'm your girl, come find me. Um, as we've mentioned already, I don't mind helping people. I don't mind being in the conversation if they need my help or guidance. I've even, what is it called? A mediator. Yes. I've I've done that before. I've done that plenty of times. Um, I try to do my best to respect that person as long as they're respecting me. Um, I will answer any questions uh to the best of my ability. If it's not for that person to know, then they're just not gonna know. Um and I am a very honest person. You can ask all that love me and that are around me. I just who I am. Um and I always tell people you either love Rashida or something's wrong with you. But I do, I say that all the time, and I think that's just so, so funny. But it is truly the truth. Yeah, you either love me or you don't. And I'm not offended by it because the people I have in my corner, that's all that I need. Um, and I love and I cherish them. So, like, I hope my family and friends can always continue to ask me questions to allow me to be here and to guide them and things like that. But there are hard conversations for some people. Um, the things that you were pointing out make complete sense why things can be uncomfortable and things for people, because not everybody can always ask those questions, answer those questions, or anything like that. But like for me, out of all of it, if you love someone enough, just take the time, ask the questions, take the time and sit and listen to them. Yeah, if you know that you're a reactor, maybe you should try something different. Like, I don't know, get a talking stick or an object, whoever's holding that object can only talk, or put a blank pages in front of you. So while that person is talking and you have some points, like they brought up something, like, oh, I remember you said that before, and I'm not really sure why you keep bringing that up. Like, write all that down so it's much easier for you to when it's your turn to talk and be respectful to that person.

SPEAKER_00 29:02

You can have a notebook to pass.

SPEAKER_01 29:04

Yeah, just oh yeah. I like that idea. Like a notebook, because maybe you both are not too comfortable with talking about it because it might get into an argument, it might be a yelling match. So, yeah, just go get a notebook, a cheap notebook, or find one in your home already and title it conversations between you and I, whoever those people are. You write kids, your spouse, a friend, and write what you're feeling, and good, bad, or indifferent, pass it along to them, yeah, let them reply back, and you guys just keep passing it. And maybe by the end we're laughing and loving on each other, and those moments that are were at the very beginning of that are no longer anything.

SPEAKER_00 29:45

I love that task. That's a great idea. Because it's not really walking away from the conversation and you're still having that conversation, yeah. And then, like, there's from that outcome, then you'll have a genuine relationship and be able to apologize and become comfortable enough to have peace with each other. I love that, and to solve your issue.

SPEAKER_01 30:06

Yes, yeah. Would you say is there any other conversations that are hard for you? Because you're a business owner also.

SPEAKER_00 30:13

Yes. So when it comes to like clients and things like that, my hard conversation with clients is my pricing and them paying for the services. Gotcha. That's always the hard part. The hardest part of owning a business is people complain about your pricing and your time and why are your pricing this way, stuff like that. Well, the people still have to work and support themselves and pay bills. Yeah. So, like that, but like I feel like too owning a business, like in a hard conversation is like when people overstep and like abuse your um services, okay. Like they tend to not respect you and then your rules and stuff like that. But I really haven't dealt with that, but I've heard it from other people. Okay. Um, but yeah, that's also something that can be hard conversation. Like, hey, like I don't really feel comfortable um doing this anymore. Yeah, like having to move a client is hard too.

SPEAKER_01 31:14

Gotcha. But you have not had to experience that before. No, okay.

SPEAKER_00 31:18

Well, that's good because I like all my clients and all the new clients that I'm gaining. Um because then too, I'm building relationships with people, and I I love that.

SPEAKER_01 31:29

And then you're making connections in different ways too. So, which is awesome. Yeah. No, that's really, really good. Um, in my line of work, um, my conversations are just hilarious. Um, I don't I don't think I would say I have hard conversations. It's just I'm there to help and guide people throughout the day, answer the phones, uh, communicate via email, social media, and things like that was my job. Um we, yeah, I wouldn't say, I mean, at times or definitely could be some. Yes. Um, we have people that stay and go the line of business that I'm in. Um, the people are 1099 contractors, so obviously they're moving on to bigger and better is what they think it is, bigger and better. Um, but I would say sometimes hard conversations are, I don't have that part because I'm I don't deal with any of the money. I would say a hard conversation is like, hey, your bill is past due, you owe this, or whatever the case may be. So I don't deal with that. Um, but sometimes I have to remind people of what they need to do, where they need to go, and how they need to handle certain things. Um, but I try to say it the best way possible.

SPEAKER_00 32:37

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 32:37

Um, I try to answer the phone with a smile, I try to talk with a smile. Um, but I am human. So, you know, I play the part when clients come in.

SPEAKER_00 32:46

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 32:46

But if it's someone that works there and I'm just my normal stuff, what's wrong? I'm like, nothing's wrong, everything's fine. So, you know, sometimes conversation can be hard, and I'm definitely real with them. This is how I'm feeling, this is what's going on today in my life, this is what's going on today, you know. Oh, I get it, Rashida. I apologize, not a problem. So I don't like sugarcoat things and make everything sound great all the gosh darn time either. So that makes sense. But this was a good one.

SPEAKER_00 33:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:14

So think about the conversations that you have with the people in your household. Replay this, listen to the key points that we said, maybe try out some of the different types of ways to have the conversations with the people that you love so that you can make the relationships better. And if you are currently in a relationship, husband, wife, whatever it may be, partner, remember, talk to them first. Try to figure it out, try to work it out, and don't put it on social media because ain't nobody on there can help you at all whatsoever.

unknown 33:44

Get a therapist. It's okay to go see a therapist.

SPEAKER_00 33:48

Keep your business between you and your four walls.

SPEAKER_01 33:51

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Have those hard conversations in your home, yes, or whatever the case may be. So this was a good one. Looking forward to the next. But until then, we want you to know that you are loved, you are valued, and you are never alone.

SPEAKER_00 34:07

This is the Bond Beyond where connection grows deeper than word.