Girl Talk Bonus Material

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:19

I'm just a D girl from Runaway with a whole lot of shit to say. It's your girl, KD. What up, what up, what up? It's your girl, Lady Blaze. Big Blaze. Whopping is back to Cocktails and Girl Talk. Okay. You know, this is just where we kick the shit, you know. I needed that. That was the table. Okay. You might you might tighten. Yeah. Talk about it. What cocktail we got today, Lady Blaze? Today's feature cocktail is the Blaze Tempo. Ooh, okay. What's the ingredients? The ingredients is light ice. A shot of Esplanade Resphano. Spray with a splash of grenadine on top. Little splashy splash. A little splashy splash. All right. It looks like mine got more than a splash, but it's cool. Pretty red. The wine of the day is 19 crimes, has a liquid death combination.

SPEAKER_03 1:23

Isn't it water?

SPEAKER_04 1:24

It's very it's carbonated water, but this is not carbonated. And it's very dry.

SPEAKER_03 1:29

So if it's not carbonated, wouldn't I just make it water with wine?

SPEAKER_04 1:34

Or maybe they just it doesn't mean liquid death is in there. Maybe they just collabed on a wine.

SPEAKER_03 1:44

But then okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 1:46

Maybe like the people who created liquid death made it got with 19 crimes and they collabed on something. Not necessarily including the liquid death. Because the drink is not carbonated at all. I would have you taste it, but you're not gonna like it because it's very dry.

SPEAKER_03 2:00

Very dry.

SPEAKER_04 2:01

No, you might take the wine last night. Oh, taste it. You might like it. All right, y'all. All right, y'all. Welcome back. Welcome back. Happy month. Oh I told you. Didn't I tell them? Happy Monday. Happy Monday. We out here kicking the week off. Kicking the week off like we do. How was y'all weekend? Our weekend was amazing. What a ball. What a life to live. I love this little life. I love this little life of mine. Shout out to my little life of mine. I'm gonna let it change. Y'all is hilarious. How was your weekend? Our weekend was pretty good. We uh chill with some folks, watch some WrestleMania.

SPEAKER_02 2:38

Oh, that was lit.

SPEAKER_04 2:39

That was lit. That was it. We did our first live podcast where we were guests on someone's live podcast, so that was dope. Uh we're gonna do some more live podcasts. We're gonna get together, make some content for the people. Yes, for sure, for sure. Sell some tickets. For sure. If y'all listening, that means you have to buy the tickets. Or we send in our box of nephew to your house to beat your list. No, yeah, for real. All of that. Okay. Shout out, bro. Shout out to bro, to nephew, bro. All right, so over the week I heard a conversation between another podcast I listened to. But their topic was Miss Amber Rose has decided that biracial women are not black. I have heard that I've heard that take from her before. As a biracial woman, how do you feel about that? As a biracial woman myself, I understand the stigma that she may be in, or like the identity crisis, right? And we talk about this all the time. Sometimes we feel like we're not white enough for our white family or peers. And then sometimes we feel like we're not black enough for our black family and black peers. And I can I can understand how she's caught up in a chance. She definitely needs to digress from that. It's like a it's almost like a stigmatic mind state, right? Because what are you really saying? If you're black, you're black. And they they and I don't know if this is like an actual fact. If you have a drop of black blood in you, you are considered black.

SPEAKER_03 4:14

That's what they've always said. Yeah, it's called the one-drop rule. They say you take what your father is.

SPEAKER_04 4:19

See, people say that too, but on the flip side, I have a person I know, she's biracial, but her mom is black, and her dad is white, right? So maybe people still consider her black, you know what I'm saying? Even though her dad is not black, her dad is white, right?

SPEAKER_03 4:35

Maybe I feel like it's more of what culture is brought up in the household.

SPEAKER_04 4:40

That's a way to look at it. That's that's a great way to look at it. Listen, it's this couple, and shout out to y'all, they are from Michigan. I follow them on my TikTok. I might have to pull up their uh handle so I can shout them out properly. But it is an African-American wife and a Caucasian husband, and you have two little girls, and she affirms this you are black, you are beautiful, you are strong. Yeah, and I feel like that you are what your father is. It's not if you are a black, if you have a black parent, the black is the dominant race. And because we've been astracies for so long, it's kind of like the unpreferred choice. Right. And it sucks, you know what I'm saying? Especially look at Amber Rose's million dollar, you know what I'm saying? Million dollar girl. She can fucking identify as a clown if she wanted to, because that's what you are. You are identifying as a clown taking that away from yourself. I think she should identify as a clown. And then, girl, you gotta talk about with Khalifa. Like you couldn't have got more the clown, actually. Yeah, so she just needs to go back to therapy, get on her Tommy Lee shit, get them uh, get them miss strict and up a little bit. You know what I'm saying? I just feel like she's an idiot, but yeah, which is my personal opinion. I mean, being biracial is a race in itself, right? We're biracial, we're of two races, yeah. So to say that we can't identify as black is insane, right? You know what I'm saying? Because us walking around saying we white women, but that's what she wants to identify, not weird because it's happy. But the crazy thing is she probably could pass for full white, yeah. So she opened her damn mouth. That's true. But I'm just saying, just uh just on the just looking at it, right? She could pass for Caucasian woman. We got two older brothers that could pass for Caucasian men. Yes, you know what I'm saying? Like you just like we got a brother, which is little man's dad, he tell people he's biracial, they like they don't believe him. You know what I'm saying? So it's like with my grandmama, don't play with that girl, our kid. I don't know. I just feel like that was some clown activity from a for sure 100%. Especially for her to be a biracial woman.

SPEAKER_03 6:42

Does it get back in the news?

SPEAKER_04 6:43

Or is she so I thought she was though, isn't she biracial? She is definitely biracial. So you know who else is like this, and don't cancel this. But Mariah Carey always had an identity issue. She did, yeah. And she never really came out for real, like I am a proud black man. Well, she did, but not the way people wanted her to. Okay. Because people wanted her to come out as black the same way she came out as white, and she didn't necessarily do that, but she did say, like at the time, the person who she was married to, who's also her manager, had encouraged her and pushed her to claim to be a white woman. Right. Because he felt like it would be better for her career. Right. So once she got away from him, if you notice, like in the late 90s, early 2000s, when she started doing songs with like Boys to Men, Jermaine Depreet, Jermaine Dupree, DeBrat. You know what I'm saying? So she tried to get in touch with her, whatever she was touching on.

SPEAKER_03 7:48

Like her mixed breed as like a celebrity.

SPEAKER_04 7:51

The what?

SPEAKER_03 7:51

Like a mixed breed.

SPEAKER_04 7:53

Bruh, smack the shit out of you. She is offended by the word mixed mixed because she's my cake better. Tell him again. Because she's my cake better. Then you said mixed breed. Are we puppies?

SPEAKER_03 8:04

Oh Lord. What? Highly sensitive. Biracial. Biracial. I apologize. Biracial. I hope y'all saw his face.

SPEAKER_02 8:12

He like who is this?

SPEAKER_04 8:15

And this person is also quad racial. So he's so thrown. Like, wait a minute. He's all the race. I was just like, huh? Literally, you are.

SPEAKER_03 8:26

I'm just let y'all take that one. I'm sorry, go ahead. No, I don't even remember now.

SPEAKER_04 8:30

You said with the biracial.

SPEAKER_03 8:31

I feel like as a celebrity with the biracial, do you think they play the race? Like you said, the game, what career is high at that moment? Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 8:39

For sure. The family. Yeah. They they use it to their advantage. They go where the money is. Yeah. But if you think about it, like people that are not celebrities that are biracial use it to their advantage too, when it comes to like getting like high-paid jobs, or like you know what I mean? Like, I'm 99.999999% sure that our two older brothers put Caucasian on a oh the camera on their job applications. 99.9999. I say 100.000 for the side sleep code me. Hey, they don't once you get into the interview and you blow the interview off, you know, out the water, that's just technicality. So yeah. So that I think fast it. I think they do that for sure. No, I don't think. I well, I said 99.99999. Well, I'm 100. Because maybe if they were applying an NWA NAACP, they would put African American.

SPEAKER_03 9:35

How? Then they pull up and they pull up that and they like Sampach. No.

SPEAKER_04 9:41

He said that man whole nation. I forgot. I'd be forgetting. All right, let's move along. My nephew's out of control. Okay, so I got a question. As business owners, how do we feel about our friends who support other people's businesses, but not our business? As in like paying somebody else to do what we do already. I think we spoke on this last episode. Um, and I'm I'm glad that we did revisit this because oh shit, yes, girl, had an experience. I had a friend reach out to me about a cleaning. Okay. A couple weeks later, she reached out to me about working for the company as a cleaner. So I'm like, oh, you know what I'm saying? As as volume comes in, da da da boom. She literally posts her house, like frame different frames of her house. Oh, I just got my house cleaned by Molly Maid or something like that. And I was like, girl, what do you what was the point? Who would like? Did you reach out for the job? Did you re did you reach out just to be known? Like, what was what's we have for prices? Yes. So I wonder if she was doing a price comparison without being honest that she was doing a price comparison. I think I think that was it. I don't, I do use a popular pricing tool that cleaner, most cleaning companies use, but nobody's beating Molly Main's rates. They pay their cleaners like $15 an hour. So no one, yeah, you're not beating those rates. But yeah, I experienced that. And honestly, all business is not good business, right? That's true. But and all friends are not good friends, right? So you gotta categorize people where they fall. I cannot, I cannot get mad at you for showing up in a way that you're unable to, right? Yep. And I should get mad at myself for you're my friend, you should come to me and support my business because I have this business. Well, shame on me. You know what I'm saying? Shame on me for thinking that because everybody is their, you know, their own entity. Yeah. So I was like, huh, this is funny. This is a funny twirl. Me, me and DCM had the situation where we had a person who was in a particular business, and every time we had an event or something, we always booked this person. Birthday parties, weddings, it ain't matter. We was booking this person, right? So when that person decided that they were going to enter into something that they could have shared business with us, they went somewhere else. Okay. So super shady. So we like, wait a minute. So we just scrolling and we see it, we like this. What is this? So you know, I said something like, so what made you do what made you go that route? Yeah. And they were like, Oh, it was last minute, and we didn't, we didn't think you guys were available. I said, Did did you ask? If first of all, it was a pretty big event, so it wasn't last minute, you know what I'm saying? So that was a lot all in itself, but because of that, now next time now that we do bit, we don't do business with that person anymore. Yeah, for sure. Because when you had the opportunity to share share resources, reciprocate, yeah, you decided not to. Like if I'm gonna book somebody to clean my house, it would be mad wild for me to go to like cleanings are us and you whole ass or a cleaner. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? With your own cleaning business, like, why not keep the money in the pot? Why you and then another thing I hate is when people do decide to use you or support you, quote unquote support, they want a discount. Oh my god, hey, I want you to make a hundred shirts for me for $25. Is you high? Oh, to buy by tomorrow. Really today. I need a speed order. Really, I need it by the end of the day. Listen, I got 25 hot cakes for a hundred shirts, and and when it per professionally made perfect. Yes, yes, and I just need you to put the little logo on there, bro. Do you know how much effort and time it takes to make one shirt? Man, but only 25 shirts. And are you well? If I buy the shirts, can you just do it? You think you think shirts are the only material? Is it wait? Do you think buying the shirts is the hardest part of that process, though? Like what no, but it not only that but you want to press it? What about the vinyl? What about the logo? What about the heat? Like what? What about the peeling? That was so tedious.

unknown 14:15

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_04 14:17

And you're gonna come through with with oh, I got the shirt. Go. How about you go to hell? How about you go to hell?

SPEAKER_03 14:22

So it's better to separate friendship and business. That's true. I am learning. Because if my best friend got a food truck, right? But you can't cook. Well, the money I just earned, why would I support your business? I mean, that's true too. That is true. Like, you my man's I love you and all, but you can't cook. So, like, if I just work my ass off for some money and I'm hungry, and I know you can't cook, but you my friend, and but you mad at me that I went down the street to McDonald's or whatever else, I know they're good. You can't be mad at me.

SPEAKER_04 14:48

That is a good point. Yeah, I still love it.

SPEAKER_03 14:50

I love I hope is drive, but I don't think you need to be like, if you're sitting in the truck, like, man, that's going to sleep.

SPEAKER_04 14:58

Your food's not good for it. Or you know, like, like I know you don't wash your hands. Why would I get your hands? I'm serious. Why do you keep a dirty ass house? You don't watch your hands. You know what I'm saying? You got to go see dry. Every time. I'm talking about the soap so dry look like it's never been water.

SPEAKER_03 15:15

All you hear is the squeaky sound and water been running here, and four more, four people running through here. Like, wait.

SPEAKER_04 15:22

Oh, he ain't got a point though. Definitely.

SPEAKER_03 15:24

We could be best of friends, we can be homework, we can kick on the block, chill, but your food too well. He right, yeah. For sure. You can't cook spaghetti. You don't want me to buy a $30 plate. No, he right. I'll pass. But I love you. I hope you thrive.

SPEAKER_04 15:36

But you know what? I I'll probably do like a little donation. Just like I don't want them. Give me a pub. Canned. Can't mess with it. And a bag of chips. Better made. All right, keep that one out. The MP. What's the requirements for princess treatment? We want a the male perspective on this. Hold on, I gotta get this from the top. Hold on, we need it from the top. We gotta get this from the top. So I'm gonna jump in and get and give a little bit more basis for that.

SPEAKER_03 16:08

All right. Okay. So this is that's a thinker. It is a thinker. That was a rough. That was a rough. It was rough.

SPEAKER_04 16:15

It was rough. And I love the fact that I was able to encourage you guys to really think about what y'all what y'all wanted in women, right? Because that's what the conversation really opened up to when you ask a person a question, and they really have to like think about it and be like, damn, let me put some real thought into before what I say. And then I asked the question last night like five times, like five times, and every time, like they either got more in depth or they veered off, but you can really see like the um the change in men and the trajectory of what relationships are now. So my question to the group was what are the requirements for giving a girl princess treatment? And one answer I got was, what the hell do you say? If if she knows her worth, right? Which it seems like a very vague. But guys know right off top of interacting with you if you care about yourself, if you, you know what I'm saying, how you carry yourself. So when he said that, I was like, okay, that's valid. But then another another guy was like, uh-huh, it it depends on uh what she do for me. And I was like, Well, that wasn't the question. Oh, he won't he won't a bitch to buy him flowers, yeah. In so many words, I'm so mad American, in so many words, he was kind of given she gotta treat me like a king first before I can reciprocate the princess treatment. But my thing is, in men, are you guys not taught to be a gentleman, to be chivalrous, to court, to all these things that build up to that?

SPEAKER_03 17:59

See how I look at it like I was raised around women, you know what I'm saying? Like, so my perspective on it, it's different than other men's because women raise me. So apprentice treatment, girl, if I can look at you in your face every day and get butterflies in my stomach still, girl, you can have everything in this room. But the day I wake up, or we we get to crossroads and it just goes where you never thought it would go, like it just shows you. I mean, pressure treatment is different, it's hard to explain. It's just I don't know, it's what you you just know the feeling. Like so I said it was objective, right?

SPEAKER_04 18:32

It is, it is because just you know, the one is objective though, because what I might think is processed treatment is uh what you might not think process treatment, right? Or like what somebody else thinks is princess treatment. I might think that's bare minimum requirement. Exactly. You know what I'm saying? Like so objective, but I I do feel like the more respect you have for yourself, the more you're gonna demand from somebody else. Absolutely, and I also think it's upbringing, right? Like daddy taught us a man supposed to open the door for you, a man supposed to walk on the outside of you, a man supposed to do all these things. So naturally, we ain't taking nothing less. That's like for some women, a man opening the door for her is like for us, we like everybody's who I'm supposed to open the door for.

SPEAKER_03 19:18

You ever go down town and you see a guy walking on the wrong side of the street? That shit pisses me off so fucking bad. I'm young.

SPEAKER_04 19:23

I mean, wanting to snack, get your bike.

SPEAKER_03 19:25

Every man's you're supposed to be on the other side of my dog.

SPEAKER_04 19:27

You know what's crazy? Uh another one that you just fucking opening doors. Sometimes if I'm because I'll get so focused and locked in that I'll I will, I'll snatch for a door.

SPEAKER_03 19:36

We we snatch it.

SPEAKER_04 19:37

But but sometimes I'll stop. Go ahead and open this door. Yeah, I'm not, I don't have to. Don't get me wrong. I will. I'll be lying and be in my own world. And okay, yeah. But no, yeah, go ahead. What the or I be I look at the boys like you you waiting on me to open the door? No, no, no, no, no, no. Because we'll be all walking and I'll just stop, and then they'll stop. Now we all just stop.

SPEAKER_03 20:01

We're gonna stay here forever. Because what's going on? Yeah, get the door.

SPEAKER_04 20:04

Who the fuck can open the door? They were like, Oh shit, sorry, my bad, you know. So we these are oh sorry, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:10

Y'all know that boy. Listen, um can't you introduce yourself?

SPEAKER_04 20:13

Oh, you neither one of y'all introduced yourself. Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

It's little man, y'all didn't open the floor, but in the rest of it is dude, y'all said y'all the hold of the floor. You gotta just wait. She said Katie, Katie, it's your girl, Katie, Lady Blake.

SPEAKER_03 20:27

And no, y'all the and no, I'm a little man, I'm I am part of them. But um, they are MPs, they are male respect for the show.

SPEAKER_01 20:34

It is harder now though, because a lot of women act like men. So now you're saying now you want to subject yourself to when you want this princess treatment as opposed to when you want to be the man in the relationship, and now it's a battle. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_02 20:50

Damn.

SPEAKER_01 20:51

How do you handle that?

SPEAKER_03 20:53

I feel like you shouldn't have to be in that situation to handle it. I feel like you should be with a partner that respects it. Like you want to be treated like a king, like she wants to be treated like a princess. It goes both ways. Yeah, you can't I can't treat you like a queen, I get treated like a peasant. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_04 21:09

We both we both kings around this place.

SPEAKER_03 21:11

You know what I'm saying? We both got we both.

SPEAKER_04 21:12

We both just standing up. What the fuck are you talking about?

SPEAKER_03 21:16

So dang. I think it's a two-way street there.

SPEAKER_04 21:19

No, I do agree. I do agree that if your man treat you right, you should treat him right as well.

SPEAKER_03 21:25

I do agree with that. But to an extent, too. Like at the end of the day, there's we're still men. Like, and that's the thing.

SPEAKER_04 21:31

My thing is like, I'm not opening your door. No, I hope not. But I'm just saying, like, that's a that to me, that's what these men want. And I don't know from experience, I just know from listening to conversation. They want the door open for them. They want they want to go in and pay for the gas and you pump it. I ain't pumping no fucking gas. Like, bro, I got a husband, five sons, and so many fucking nephews. I'm never we're just gonna pump. You said listen, I pulled up to a gas station a couple weeks ago and I called Shred, like, hey, can you come pump my gas? He like, yeah. He pulled up on me, pumped my gas on my home. Because why am I pumping gas on my son down the street? No answer. You know what I'm saying? Like, I and and maybe, but to me, that's like bare minimum. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, if I ever had to be with another nigga, he probably would hate me off top. Because who taking the trash out? Me? I'm not taking a fucking trash out. You standing right there. But that's because in my relationship that I've been in for 27 years, I don't have to take the trash out. I don't have to pump the gas. I don't know how to change a fire. I got a flat tire the other day and called my husband. Hey, my light is going down and my car is blinking, making weird noises.

SPEAKER_01 22:46

Please help me. And what's crazy is the seed that you came from is okay with doing all of that. The seed that you came from, your mama, she'll do it all. Oh, yeah. She takes chairs out, she's pumping on gas, she was doing all of that. But and that's the thing I was about to ask y'all, because it feels like I it feels kind of confusion, right? Because he was teaching you one thing, but she was pushing another object of the objective. You know what I'm saying? So your dad was teaching you this, these are the things.

SPEAKER_04 23:24

No, I wouldn't agree with that because if he was there, like if we was all out together, then he was opening doors and pumping gas. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? Oftentimes he was at work while we was out. Yeah, so he can't very well pump gas that he's not there to pump. But he would either put put gas in the car in the car before he left. But and then but we drove all that out, so yeah, or he left enough money, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. For to be able to cover that expense, yeah. Yeah, no, I I think we learned very early that our mother was our uh like an alternative. Um right, I like that friend.

SPEAKER_03 24:03

Oh yeah, but yeah, like I guess I like that.

SPEAKER_02 24:10

Yeah, I did.

SPEAKER_04 24:11

Uh huh. We look we learned very early on that our mother was alternative, and we acclimated to that, right? And we very well knew that those things were not of what we were taught. And we very well knew that these were not things of what we wanted ourselves. Um, and we learned that very early, very early in life. So, like upon birth. I do too. We said this ain't that I ever thought anything left. This is insane. She said, But no, no, no, no. Just to bring it back together, my dad did what he could. At every single point that there was an opportunity, he hit it. You know what I'm saying? Like, of course, he's human, right? So he didn't have it every single time. He didn't get it right every single time. But he made sure that he instilled in us things that other fathers really weren't instilling in their daughters, and that was just the quality of time that he spent with us just talking to us, you know what I'm saying? Like a lot, yeah, from like 15 to 18 for me was some of the my most trying years for real. And my dad's wisdom really helped keep me, you know what I'm saying, from going as far into the water that I really could. I was in the water, but I didn't go. She was like at the buoy, you know, like once you went under the movie, she was like, she put her toe. Oh, no, it's not like this part of her body was on the buoy, and her feet was on the other side, you know what I'm saying? Her whole body never went on that side, and yeah, you know, and it it it was for his strength and his wisdom and his patience, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, when it's total opposite, like they were opposites, right? Like to say the least, yeah. Like her her love felt a lot of transactional. You were good today, so I gave you an extra hug, or you get to sit on the couch and watch TV or whatever. My dad, it was nothing transactional. You you know what I'm saying? We got the love off rip, like uh waking us up Sunday mornings to take us to Big Boys for the breakfast party. That that is love music. Like for the pizza hood, you used to take the sweet sort of the side park. Yep, yep, yep, you know, that's but that's what I was telling you. Like, he did spend a lot of time with us, even like I used to always say, like, Bell O'Goring to work, so we driving in separate cars still below, but he's gonna be out there with us for about four or five hours, and he's gonna go to work and we're gonna stay until it gets dark, you know what I'm saying? But he was still there until he had to go to work. Like for Sissy, it was more like they played chess together. I didn't I asked him to learn how to play chess. I felt like they was mean about it. I didn't have a sign.

SPEAKER_03 26:48

No, nothing, they were definitely mean about it.

SPEAKER_04 26:50

That's what I'm saying. So I was like, I'm straight. So for me, it was taking me to the bookstore, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01 26:55

So I could get the little read, I could read about chess type shit.

SPEAKER_04 26:59

You know what I'm saying? Or like I could get those, you know, the Pizza Hut thing. I don't know if y'all had it at y'all store.

SPEAKER_03 27:04

The book when you read the books, yeah, and then they gave you the things.

SPEAKER_04 27:07

Yeah, DPS.

SPEAKER_03 27:09

Shout out DPS. I didn't go to DPS, but where do you go?

SPEAKER_04 27:12

St. Francis. But I'm just saying, but yeah, but that instilled in us what we felt like princess treatment should be. But for us, it was this bare minimum. This not like extravagant. So I guess the question is is princess treatment just regular shit, or is princess treatment the over and above part of it? No, I think princess treatment is exactly what society tries to make it seem the trips, the shopping, the the extra. So the extra shit. That's the extra case. Yeah. Okay. Now, if you were and just to advocate for the men who think off the rip, a woman is not entitled to Princess Treatment. You you have bops out here, you know what I'm saying, who search just solely for that. And they're entitled to their right, but what are you doing for it? Like you you busting it open for $40 at the roach coach. It's like a revolving door, like of course type shit. You discount this, you know what I'm saying? Like it's it's it gets kind of crazy in your field. Where the coupons at? Where the coupons at, you know what I'm saying? Groupons. No, not groupon, that's where you're coochie. I didn't want to do that. And you know what? And and her in some in some ways she made fans of hey, and when it and when it gives me 50, that's that's keep looking out, you know, and that she may feel like a princess. That might be her shit. But I am, I am, she is very less likely to get flown out to get the shopping space, to get the houses and the cars, and that's what quote unquote princess treatment is. But us women, we're so hyper, hyper independent because men have dropped the ball for so long. There are not a lot of men like you, or like my dad, or even like you know, little man who he's trying, you know what I'm saying? Like, I'm gonna get out here trying to get you don't have that anymore. You have way more what you doing, what you gonna do for it? You know what I'm saying? Like, it's so transactional, it's not genuine anymore. So, do you think it's because so I seen this meme on social media, and it was a woman that was pouring into her kids and she didn't need a man? I don't need a man, I don't need a man, I don't need a man, I don't need a man, I don't need a man, which caused the little girl to say, I don't need a man either. Which caused the little boy to say, I don't want to be a man, I don't want to be a man. So, do we feel like the way that these young men are being brought up? Yeah, 100% is why it's such a struggle. Like, are women so hyper independent and so quote unquote masculine because the men have now become so feminine because of their mothers pouring into them that men ain't shit, men don't do shit, you know what I'm saying? Because our sons can only be as good as we make them for sure. Now, my thing is what I've learned now that I have adult children is them motherfuckers gonna take the tools that you gave them to build a mansion, they're gonna build a house if that's what they want to do, right? But you know they got the tools to do right. They just you know what I'm saying, like if we have all the hammers and nails and plywood in the world, we don't know how to build a house, right?

SPEAKER_03 30:29

But the tools are there, it all starts with a foundation.

SPEAKER_04 30:32

That's what I'm saying. So the foundation is there, what you do with it is on you because life is about decision here. Oh, life is about decisions, right? So I is is that why do we think that's why society is the way it is now? I think society I think society is the way that it is now because we have taken so much structure out of the community and out of the households and out of acceptable lifestyle. Um yeah, like kids are pawns now and not kids, you know what I mean? Like I remember when we were younger, the boys' dad used to come get them every weekend, every Friday. He will come to the house and pick them up, and then Monday after school, they will come home, right? Now I feel like women are like, you can't see your son unless you give me XYZ.

SPEAKER_03 31:26

No, no, what they was like that before. It was like that before. Yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_04 31:31

Oh, but I figured that I think everything is so much more magnified now because of social media, that's true, and because of the internet, because everything that we were going through pre-internet, it would nobody knew. Nobody knew. That's true.

SPEAKER_03 31:46

There was no way you can be whoever you want to be on social media.

SPEAKER_04 31:49

You can be whoever you yes, you can, but before social media, when we went through things, it was not displayed for the public to see. That's right. So a lot of these, a lot of these things were happening behind closed doors. Yeah, a lot of these power struggles, and you can't do this, and you can't do that. That was all happening behind closed doors. Now you hop it on Facebook and your internet thugging and you're with your with your 10 fingers, keyboard thugging, you know what I'm saying? Europe. And now the whole world gets to see what you're going through, and now the whole world gets to have an opinion, and now European is is is influenced by what everybody else by the comments or whatever. Okay, by everybody else's opinion.

SPEAKER_03 32:35

You might not have a back because you look for a hundred million people to have your back against this one person who got some tons.

SPEAKER_01 32:40

You know what the ship was? I think I believe the ship was back in the day, so it's always been a thing where women needed to be loved. Men needed to be needed. So if you think about it back in the day, men was needed. Sometimes it was just financial, you know what I'm saying? Sometimes it was more of a strength thing to be like the hammer in the house type thing. But no matter what it was, you were needed. Then the world shifted to where women started to, they wanted to be independent, they wanted to get their own job and they wanted to do their own thing, and they wanted to take on a lot of the roles that the men were needed in, and now men are less likely to be needed in relationships now. We don't really care about being wanted at some point. You know what I'm saying? We want, we need to be needed. We want to feel needed. We need that need, you know what I'm saying? It's something that feeds, uh, it's the ego thing. So we need to be needed.

SPEAKER_03 33:39

So many I feel like go ahead on, go ahead on. Go ahead. I feel like so many women though, been through so much trauma like this recent generations that we are struggling to feel that because women don't really feel safe, honestly, feel safer, really. If you look at it, need a man, real life. You know what I think too.

SPEAKER_04 33:59

Like for me, you know, I always felt like I wanted to work, and I wanted to always make sure I have my own capabilities or abilities to have my own because of what I seen mama go through. You know what I'm saying? Like, you so angry at this man where you don't want to be with him anymore, and you got to move to a whole nother state because you don't have your own. You know what I'm saying? And then, like, from there, I went and stayed with your mom, who did every fucking thing because your dad was in jail. So she had to do everything. So she, I don't know, just seeing like I guess in my mind, if I had to choose, I would rather be the person that could help and take care of everybody, right? Versus the person that always needs somebody to take care of me. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? So that's what programmed me to say, I'm gonna always have my own something for sure. No matter, I don't give a fuck if it's just a little savings in the bank, or like I always gotta have my own something. To piggyback on that, that's what the grant are like our our grandmothers and our great-grandmothers, they could not leave, they couldn't leave. That's what I'm saying. They were stuck, they had to stay. So that routine, the routine that we left, the routine that they had then, it wasn't done out of choice, it was done out of necessity. And because money is so easy to earn now, I don't need a man in my household to make a hundred thousand dollars before I can do that by myself. I could I could jump on a TikTok and because content creating and in that streaming world is so magnetic and like so that's the wave now, right? Anybody can take off, literally. So it's not it's not hard to make the next move. No, no, and that's where the change really for real came from. Grim, like I said, grandma can leave. Grandma can leave, she has five kids, no income. He was bringing in all the money, so then Molly and Aunties, they was like, okay, hmm. So we're not gonna stay home, we're gonna have a job too, and we're gonna had a little money in the bank. And that was the the first phase of the change. Women actually getting out there to okay, yeah, we can work and we can't, we can do these things. We can do these things. All right, boom. Now we're doing these things. Well, now we're teaching the younger girls, which is me and you, listen, have your money put up, yeah, have your wits about you, don't, don't blindly trust. Like they instill these things in us to kind of change the the the narration of the thing of the of the story. But it's like you you're changing the the DNA of the of everything. They are they're changing the structure of the family, yeah. But so now here we are three generations later, and y'all yelling at us like y'all want to be men, and we're yelling at y'all like, no, we just want y'all to be the men. But that's what I'm saying. I think that's where the breakdown comes, right? Because, like, like Yase was saying, like, now we've been taught never to need a man, right? So now we like we don't need men, and then men allowed you to show up in a different way.

SPEAKER_03 37:15

But it shouldn't, it shouldn't be like that. Cause like, but like I was saying, like I was raised with women, like you, you guys, my my mother, my grandmother. So, like, to me, I I would never accept nothing less than perfect from a woman, especially in a woman in a relationship, because you can't tell me that you can't do something when I watch women from generations do it. That's true. So that's why that's true.

SPEAKER_04 37:39

My like my relationship don't work out because I won't accept nothing less than but do we think that's why it's hard to quote unquote get a princess treatment? Because women feel like I do it myself.

SPEAKER_03 37:49

But that's the that's what they're is that like how like I just said how I was raised up prisons. You as a man, you know that you know that feeling, you know what woman deserves that because she like proved it to you, you know what I'm saying? Like I was raised with women, so anything less than what you're talking about, like you can't do this, you can't do that. I don't want to hear it because there's two of us. Yeah, I watch women do it with one ego, so I don't want to hear y'all can't do this, or you you know what I'm saying? That's not prisonership, that's just you look entitlement, you look at uh entitlement, you looking for a wave, like I was just gonna say that.

SPEAKER_04 38:16

Like you're looking for somebody to take care of you when you need to. I think even if you have somebody taking care of you, should still have the ability to take care of yourself. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? If something happened today, I know that I'll be okay. Like for me, that's why education was so important to me. Because today, if you decide I ain't doing this shit no more, bro. I'm out, you know what I'm saying? Not saying that that some shit ain't gonna, you know, it's gonna be a little rough.

SPEAKER_03 38:42

We're still gonna move it.

SPEAKER_04 38:43

But it's shit still gonna shake. You know what I'm saying? Kids still gonna be taken care of.

SPEAKER_02 38:46

Right.

SPEAKER_04 38:47

Because I never want to be in a situation where something happened, you leave or whatever, and now we just yeah, now we just what we lose our house or like what the fuck? You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_03 38:55

Like lose your house, lose yourself. Like is it?

SPEAKER_04 38:57

Yeah, like we still gotta be able to like keep going. You know what I mean? We still gotta be able to keep pushing, and that's why I try to teach my boys too. Like, of course, make sure you're taking care of your family, but never settle for less. Don't settle for less.

SPEAKER_03 39:10

Like, you know, be the man, but I've done it, and that shit is rough.

SPEAKER_01 39:15

I'm gonna tell you how the the most important part of like for a man, the necessity to be needed can also help you stay alive as a man. Yeah, no, something little so if if you if I feel like you need me, I'm I move differently in life, I fight more if I'm sick. I do, you know what I'm saying? Because you need me. Yeah, if I don't feel needed, then why am I here?

SPEAKER_03 39:45

We're gonna tear it up. I'm all side.

SPEAKER_04 39:46

Oh, that's why you be like that's why they always say, like, be careful who you hang out with. Because if you got everything to lose, you hang around with nigga that don't have nothing to lose.

SPEAKER_03 39:53

We're gonna lose it all together.

SPEAKER_04 39:54

Everything about to be lost right in the sauce.

SPEAKER_03 39:57

And then you lost everything. Well, he really ain't nothing to lose.

SPEAKER_04 40:00

Exactly. You lost everything. He just like this this Tuesday. Oh, yeah. This Tuesday, bro.

SPEAKER_03 40:05

We finna go to 30 years.

SPEAKER_04 40:07

Nigga really want to do 30 years because he ain't got nowhere to live anyway.

SPEAKER_03 40:10

So this is your home, and you take matter of fact, I don't want to do this no more.

SPEAKER_04 40:13

Dog, say you want to come to my house? We're gonna house in Jackson. I didn't really say Dickerson all the way up. Diggerson all the way up is crazy. That is different. Okay, so to finish her question, DTM, what do you feel like is deserving of princess treatment?

SPEAKER_01 40:35

Princess treatment to me, when I hear that phrase, it should come from a place of wanting to celebrate the person you're with. Right? So if you're not getting princess treatment, it's because you don't I don't think you're deserving for me to celebrate you. And that's another conversation within itself why you are not deserving and how to fix that. But for me, I look forward to doing those type of things. You know what I'm saying? Because the biggest thing, the biggest part of my day is watching my wife smile.

SPEAKER_03 41:10

I had a quick question. Talk about it. So how how did you know that it was that my auntie was the one to marry? Like like back to the prison treatment, like you were saying, but what made you wake up every day and look at the same woman?

SPEAKER_01 41:27

And say and say that's me. Yeah. So it's a it's a feeling that you get for one that shows like completion, right? When you feel completed, it's it's being around a person that's pushing you to that next level on a daily basis.

SPEAKER_02 41:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:41

Making you want to do better in every aspect of life.

SPEAKER_02 41:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:44

You know what I'm saying? Encouraging you even in the moment when you don't feel like you're worth being encouraged. So when you when you've got that and you see somebody that's fighting for you to be better, yeah, it's naturally you're gonna want to fight back for not only for you to be better, but for them to like it.

SPEAKER_03 42:02

It just flows.

SPEAKER_01 42:03

It's kind of like it's a natural instinct. So you know, like your your grandma was really big on taking a baby and throwing them in the water. Yeah, no, and they just naturally swank because they they they became one with the water because that's where they came from. So when I met your aunt, that's what it was. It was like ready to swim because it was just natural feel to the colour.

SPEAKER_03 42:23

We're gonna go ride it out.

SPEAKER_01 42:25

This is it. So no, for sure.

SPEAKER_03 42:31

No, yeah, that makes no that makes sense. But yeah, but yeah, I just I I just can never accept nothing less than never less than a strong woman.

SPEAKER_04 42:41

He just called. Oh I was gonna see the voice that could come up on the head. I left them in the other door. Oh they're coming for the other side.

SPEAKER_03 42:53

Oh, Jeremy wasn't hearing me on the boy. You look like a big old pink panther if you don't get the boy.

SPEAKER_04 42:59

So we have our third, third, third MP. Just walked in the building. We can bring him.

SPEAKER_01 43:08

What do we call it?

SPEAKER_04 43:09

Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_01 43:10

We got about 23 minutes. We got about 15 minutes left on this one. All right. We can cut it in five and then we'll go to the next episode.

SPEAKER_03 43:20

So we can introduce them all in the Omaha one up there.

SPEAKER_04 43:24

Hey y'all, and Miss Mamma. All right, so so oh now, I've been wanting to that scared me. Yes, it'd be scary. I have been wanting to play a game with you guys. Okay, and always thinking of random stuff. What was the one that we played? Think fast. Think fast. Okay, so brother. Now the game was called Think Fast. I'm gonna say a word, right? I'm gonna say a word, and you're going to say The first word that comes to mind when you say it. Yes. But if you stutter, stumble, or stop, you're out. So I'ma start it. Okay, then go to so it's gonna go you, me, little man, DTM. And then we'll just that's how we'll wrap. Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. All right.

SPEAKER_03 44:17

Loyalty.

SPEAKER_04 44:19

Husband.

SPEAKER_03 44:20

Respect. Refer mania. What? Let's go.

SPEAKER_04 44:22

See? All right, y'all. Thank you for tuning in to Cocktail Girl Talk. We love y'all. He is cut a light. Yeah. He goes. What's your girl KD and your girl Lady Blake?

SPEAKER_03 44:36

Big Bless. I guess we are here, y'all.

SPEAKER_04 44:38

You gotta tell them how they can find us.

unknown 44:40

Chill out.

SPEAKER_04 44:41

You gotta tell them how they can find us. Y'all can find us on Instagram at Cocktails and Girl Talk. You can listen to us on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Podbeam, or wherever you get your podcast. Yes. We'll see y'all next week. Peace.