SPEAKER_08 0:00

Brothers and sisters. Oh yeah, two. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_06 0:07

Yeah. So you know. I uh I find small talk to be awful also. No, but you're really good at it.

SPEAKER_04 0:18

I would consider you a master of of a small talk conversation.

SPEAKER_06 0:24

If we go down the the great I don't like I don't like the greatest hits of small talk. I do like deep cuts. I like to make it interesting for for myself. Okay. I like So let's play this out, okay?

SPEAKER_04 0:36

We um you know I am uh your uh your father's buddy, okay, at a uh get together, okay? Uh he just came out to a show afterwards, you know, said, Oh, great show, Steve.

SPEAKER_06 0:51

Thanks, man. Thanks for c I really appreciate you coming.

SPEAKER_04 0:54

Oh, it was a good it was so great. You're hilarious. Thank you. Uh good and traffic wasn't so bad today getting here, so it was like easy to get here. Oh, great.

SPEAKER_03 1:07

Are you the comedian guy? Um You were telling me about him you went to a show?

SPEAKER_04 1:11

Yeah. You're the comedian guy.

SPEAKER_03 1:14

How do you do that, man? How do you do that? How do you how do you do that?

SPEAKER_04 1:19

I just now so I'm not to be rude, but we're we're talking.

SPEAKER_03 1:25

Oh no, I I I got a buddy who who uh did did what he's doing, well not what he's doing, you know, in in in college. He's up on the big stage. I see I've seen you out there, man. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 1:36

I've seen you. I'm sorry. We're having a conversation, if that's okay with like so if you want to talk to Matt's. You know this guy? Uh he's my uh my friend's son.

SPEAKER_06 1:47

You you ever use you, you ever use him in your in your skits? You ever use him? You know, uh not really. It's more about like what's going on in my life and everything. I'll probably talk about whatever this that's happening right here. But how do you do that? Yeah, you know, we just gotta be present and all that. But thank uh, you know, uh thanks for did you come to the show? Wait, it sounds like you didn't come to the show, but you guys talked about it already. No, I wasn't there. Yeah, so that's how I do it. You're real good at handling it. No, but I like to talk to people about what their passions are. If I can talk to whatever another person's stand-up equivalent is, like stand-up I could talk about all night. I like to know what anybody would stay up all night talking about, and I want to talk about that.

SPEAKER_03 2:50

But I mean, that's a lot easier. I feel like we all could do that. You're good at talking to people who really want to talk to you who you don't want to talk to. Yeah. You're good at you're good at that. That's true. We we've we've talked about it watching you do it.

SPEAKER_06 3:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 3:07

Oh, really? Yeah. We've sat sort of off to the side and watched you do it, and we've talked about like we could not be doing it like that right now.

SPEAKER_04 3:17

Like af like you'll do a show at Syracuse. Here we go. After your show, you're on your way, we're walking through you, and you go, I don't want to talk to any of these people. Watch this. And then people line up to buy your merch. And you pretend to want to talk.

SPEAKER_03 3:39

And the way that you like kind of give us a glance and roll your eyes without them seeing it is like I would blow it, you know.

SPEAKER_06 3:46

Well, if if you're watching this and you want to come see uh me do a show, that is not how I feel. And and don't worry, it will be different support acts uh coming.

SPEAKER_04 3:58

Can I play one of these right now?

SPEAKER_06 4:01

The change stance. You are lucky to be talking to me. I just spent an hour of my time giving you the honor.

SPEAKER_03 4:12

Wait, wait, keep keep talking to them.

SPEAKER_06 4:14

Giving you the honor for walking. You get the honor of hearing me talk to you. Cause I I've I had another show right after. I can't.

SPEAKER_04 4:52

Man. That was pretty that was that was alright. Yeah. You had it for a moment.

SPEAKER_06 4:58

His whisper thing. Yeah. It's what's the whisper? He'll come in quiet and be like, this is a guy.

SPEAKER_00 5:06

I is going to the show.

SPEAKER_03 5:08

Oh, there. Because yeah. I I don't do a good walk-in, but it's it's it's like a very Sebastian-y with like the coming in slow and then a big explode.

SPEAKER_05 5:17

I've got to sell merch. I've got to sell merch.

SPEAKER_06 5:23

In all sizes. So if you're if you're small and I'm out of those sizes, I don't want to talk to you. I need to talk to the mediums and the extra lodges. But, anyways, uh, come see me live. I won't do any of what I just did.

SPEAKER_04 5:44

Yeah. That's uh Steve is very appreciative of his fans. Yeah. You know, despite the kind of bit we just did.

SPEAKER_06 5:50

Yeah. Um fine, you're still you're still coming to Houston. Uh yeah, I did uh a show in Dallas. It's hard to sell tickets. You guys know because you hear me uh I have a nervous breakdown every show that we do together. And I was in Dallas. I only at the time I had only sold 10 tickets. And uh I know that we were running ads and all this stuff. And uh I won't say say any names, but I I get to the show and it's it's up to 20-something tickets, and I'm like, all right, this is pretty good for me. Uh considering a year ago when I was there, I only sold 10 tickets and you you were there with me.

SPEAKER_04 6:39

So what happens when you get Peter with you on the road?

SPEAKER_06 6:43

And I I'm I'm like excited that it's double last time. I know it's gonna be a slow growth and all that stuff. I'm trying to have a positive mindset, and a guy comes in the the green room and goes, small crowd. You know, do what do what you can.

SPEAKER_02 7:00

And I'm like, oh that's rough.

SPEAKER_06 7:05

Yeah. But it's like, you know, you you start at the bottom and then you come all there. It is touch my shoe again. All right.

SPEAKER_03 7:18

I think you only had to do it once.

SPEAKER_06 7:20

Yeah, I know, but I like to do uh go for the extra credit. And here you go. You can only whisper for one minute.

unknown 7:28

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 7:31

So how are uh uh how are you, Taylor?

SPEAKER_00 7:33

I'm doing really good. I uh I I went for a little uh jog today and I didn't use any uh headphones. It was very peaceful.

SPEAKER_04 7:42

Okay, why did you do that? Was it to connect with uh everything around you?

SPEAKER_00 7:47

It was just uh yeah, it was to detach and see what my brain created in the boredom and it didn't create much. It mostly just pondered on the fact that I didn't have anything I almost just pondered on the exercise itself.

SPEAKER_04 8:05

When uh okay, so it's it was kind of meditative, right? It kind of focused you and centered you.

SPEAKER_00 8:11

Yeah, a little bit.

SPEAKER_04 8:13

Yeah. When there is no sound. What goes what's go what goes through your head? Like right now, what is going through your head? And just the honest truth.

SPEAKER_00 8:24

Right now. Not a whole lot. But when you're running, the the the the signals of the body almost like start to talk to you, like your foot hurts. You're just more aware of stuff. Your foot hurts. People are they don't like you? Your other foot hurts.

SPEAKER_04 8:49

Dude, does that really come up? People don't like you? Like their insecurities come up during that time?

SPEAKER_00 8:53

Insecurities come up, yeah. Because you're just you're getting broken down, you're very vulnerable. Where are we at? Oh, I'm not gonna. Where are we at?

SPEAKER_04 9:00

Where are we at? Do you does that thought come up a lot while running, or just in general? People don't like you.

SPEAKER_03 9:07

Uh I mean that's not exactly how it's worded, but your insecurities is the right way to put it, where um yeah, I think when you're kind of just getting broken down, you start to think about uh these things, you know. And it that doesn't mean that it's true, but um I don't know. Sometimes like if I'm when I run and I don't have anything uh to listen to, I it's like ends up being sad for some reason. Because of the insecure thoughts or the doubts? I don't know. There's just something about like uh we just there's just constant input all the time, and everything is so fast, everything's always moving. And there's something about just like running on the side of a road with no it feels like a movie. You like it like it almost like that doesn't really happen anymore where you're not listening to something, you're not talking to somebody, you don't hear somebody, at least in New York. So there's like I don't even think it's always like a uh maybe a sadness, but you're just like you realize that that's like actually what most of life is or should be is kind of like a calm state, yeah. Like like almost you feel like you're a little bit in touch with the wavelength of nature, you know? And then when you when the run is over, there's like a come down from that feeling because you're like, alright, back to life. Like life is put on pause in that moment.

SPEAKER_04 10:33

Okay, so for a moment you have an escape, but the reminder that that moment of serenity is going to end is itself sad.

SPEAKER_03 10:43

Yeah, a little bit.

unknown 10:45

Interesting.

SPEAKER_03 10:46

I think that's why people run hundred-mile races. Like the the stuff that people say they learn about themselves is almost like a like a drug trip or something.

SPEAKER_04 10:57

Because you're just kind of you're you're just forced to fight to just to face it constantly.

SPEAKER_03 11:02

You are brought to the brink of your uh I was telling you about the the backyard uh BPN race. Did I tell you about that? I don't it doesn't sound familiar. Basically, there's a there's a ra what was that?

SPEAKER_04 11:14

No, I don't know, it's just something in my neck.

SPEAKER_03 11:16

That just oh. It seemed like a here we fucking go. It looked just like that.

SPEAKER_05 11:24

I was like, I don't have to tell me about the bullshit.

SPEAKER_03 11:29

You're like, here we fucking exactly what it looked to be. I'll make it quick. Basically, it's a it's like a um they call it like a backyard event where there's like basically there's a four-mile uh like loop. That's that's a lap. So you have however many racers start, let's say there's like you know, a couple hundred racers that start. At the start of the hour, you have an hour to complete that four miles. Any time left over, you can rest, you can eat, you can sleep, you can do whatever you want. Every hour on the hour, a new lap starts, a new four-mile lap. And you keep doing that, keep running until there's one person left. And so you're running for uh days. The winner for days. The the winner, the it got down to two people. I forget what lap they were on, but they had been running for almost three days straight, and the guy ran like 304 miles. Wow. So he just was uh I forget how much he slept in total, but it was only a few minutes at a time. And like when he talks about what he experienced like in that time, I can't even imagine, you know?

SPEAKER_06 12:47

Yes. Uh yeah, I I know that uh anything that like gets you away from the distractions that we all put ourselves through to to avoid the things that we're thinking. Do you have a thing you do? To distract myself from life?

SPEAKER_03 13:05

No, the opposite. Almost to face it? To to I guess, yeah, life in all the distract yourself from all the distractions. Uh rarely.

SPEAKER_04 13:19

Yeah. The older I get, the more I I I don't. You know, I remember like the in in college, you know, I I would for moments stop playing music in my car. I just felt like there was always like this fog of gray around me. And just to let that like, to see what that would feel like, sometimes it gets intense. I'm like, oh I just end it all. You know what I mean.

SPEAKER_06 13:55

And then you're like, and now a word from our sponsor.

SPEAKER_04 14:00

Well, I mean, I'll just say I I would get dis it was it would be these intense moments of whether just silence, and it did feel just like it's a lot.

SPEAKER_06 14:08

I know exactly what you mean.

SPEAKER_04 14:09

And I would have to turn on music and like scream or like scream along with the music or something, just to kind of like knock it out or whatever. Um but you know, I uh I think eventually I read The Power of Now, which Great book one thing where it said, well, let the thoughts exist and observe the thoughts, and that those are just the thoughts you're having, and that's what you're feeling.

SPEAKER_03 14:32

So is the advice just look at the thought and then watch it go away. But yeah, they never be like sometimes it's gonna want to hang out for a little bit. Sometimes the thought doesn't just do a cute little drive-by, sometimes it just wears back and keep saying do it.

SPEAKER_04 14:51

Well, let's do a quick ad read then. If uh well, you know, let's let's do it. Why not? I feel like we've uh traversed all sorts of places today. Okay. So uh Taylor, you're gonna be Alex. Great, and Steve, you'll be Steven. Great. And this is in the office. Alex is making copies when Steven walks in. Making copies?

SPEAKER_03 15:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 15:16

Oh, by the way, uh this is uh this is something that I uh I Peter Wong wrote for Taylor and Steve. They're reading this for the first time, they don't know what they're about to read. Okay, so Alex is making copies when Steven walks in. Making copies? Yeah. It's quiet. Uh that's the that's what's happening. It's quiet in the office.

SPEAKER_06 15:35

Long week, huh? Yeah. Thank God it's Friday. Right? Can't wait to get off work. You got plans for tonight? Nothing planned. Oh yeah? There's this new bar that just opened a few blocks away from here. Why don't we get a drink? Get to know each other a little better.

SPEAKER_03 15:54

Uh no, I don't know if I have the time.

SPEAKER_06 15:56

What do you mean? You just said you have no plans for tonight.

SPEAKER_03 15:59

Uh oh, but I mean I have stuff to do, Aaron's, you know.

SPEAKER_06 16:04

Errons can wait until tomorrow.

SPEAKER_03 16:06

I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 16:08

Come on. You have a boyfriend? No. Really? Pretty girl like you is single? What's the story behind that?

SPEAKER_03 16:21

Just waiting for the right guy, I guess. Well, the wait is over.

SPEAKER_06 16:25

He's right here. Um why don't you put those copies down? Now look, you and I would have a good time. You don't want to date any of those creeps in the office. I'm a good guy. Now come on, let daddy buy you a drink.

SPEAKER_04 16:48

Um, Stephen, Peter the manager, has stepped in. What did you just say? Nothing, sir. Alex, is everything alright? Um, I'm a little uncomfortable to be honest. Stephen, get back to work. You're not gonna have a chat later. Okay, Mr. Peter. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. I will make sure he understands that what he did was not appropriate. Thank you, Mr. Peter. Please call me Peter.

SPEAKER_03 17:15

Okay, Peter.

SPEAKER_04 17:17

Come to my office so we can follow Peter's office.

SPEAKER_03 17:24

Thanks for getting me out of that situation.

SPEAKER_04 17:27

Of course. Do me a favor.

SPEAKER_03 17:29

Close the door, would you?

SPEAKER_04 17:32

Like closes the door and sits back to No, is it true that you don't have a girlfriend? Yeah. Wow, pretty girl like you, single? How does that happen? Just waiting for Mr. Wright, I guess. Maybe you shouldn't be waiting for Mr. Wright. You should be waiting for Mr. Wong. That's my last name.

SPEAKER_03 17:58

Oh, I see. Yeah, I don't know. I have a question for you.

SPEAKER_04 18:03

Yeah? When's the last time you washed your socks? A month ago. Perfect. I call that a jackpot. Take them off and put them on the table.

SPEAKER_06 18:23

I am calling HR. No. And this is all an example of why you should not make sexual advances on your coworkers. Because so many people are sensitive nowadays. They want to call H they want to keep call HR and ruin all the fun. Next time you're at work and you're thinking about making a move on your hot employee, think to yourself, is she cool? Sometimes you think she's cool, but when you when push comes to shove, they're afraid to take their socks off. So don't do it. Thank you. And back to our show.

SPEAKER_04 19:00

Nice to have an important PSA. Yeah, yeah. PSAs are good. Yeah. So I was thinking, right? Um let's think about this, okay? If you were in a situation where you saw uh like a female coworker get advanced on, you know, and you as a worker at a company, how would you advanced and uh uh verbally? Verbally, and she's kind of like, you know.

SPEAKER_03 19:30

She's visibly like also we're I'm assuming, by the way, you're phrasing this, we're talking about like a workplace. Yeah. Like a like an office or something. Yes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 19:37

Okay, me and you, we're in the break room. I'm I'm the girl. You're the guy. And you're you're just you're having I'm a bystander. You're a bystander. You're having um a Caesar salad with blue cheeks. On the side. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 19:51

Is it chunk? Because if it's the crumbles, I'll just put those on top.

SPEAKER_04 19:54

It's the crumples. Okay. Okay. All right.

SPEAKER_06 19:57

Okay. Um are the croutons like sourdough or is it like Yes. Okay. Your favorite. And grilled chicken.

SPEAKER_04 20:06

Grilled chicken.

SPEAKER_06 20:07

Great.

SPEAKER_04 20:08

Okay, ready?

SPEAKER_06 20:09

I like to do balsamic vinaigrette instead of That's not true. I do. You do?

SPEAKER_04 20:13

You like balsamic vinaigrette?

SPEAKER_06 20:15

When do you do blue cheese?

SPEAKER_04 20:16

I will do the crumbles, but the balsamic vinaigrette dressing.

SPEAKER_06 20:20

I don't like Caesar dressing.

SPEAKER_04 20:22

Okay, okay. Well let's just let's do the fucking scene.

SPEAKER_06 20:26

You started the game. I was playing it.

SPEAKER_04 20:29

But now I'm sick of it. Okay. Um, alright.

SPEAKER_03 20:35

Hey, Sam. Hi. You're looking pretty good today. Oh, thanks. I uh showered. Nice. Um, so uh are you going to that uh bar after work with uh the rest of the guys who work here?

SPEAKER_08 20:54

Um I was thinking I'd you know just gonna take it easy today.

SPEAKER_03 21:01

Uh come on, you've been working real hard. You could use uh a drink to take the edge off. My treat.

SPEAKER_04 21:07

Oh yeah? Oh that's very nice. Um, I just you know try not to drink and you know. Just get one. No, um I mean I appreciate it. I mean thanks for the offer, but I just don't think I just don't know. She's gonna go home. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:35

We could have a drink there.

SPEAKER_06 21:38

Hey, uh you guys talking about going like out after uh after work?

SPEAKER_03 21:42

Yeah, Sam doesn't want to come.

SPEAKER_06 21:44

Oh, yeah. Sam I know Sam's been working hard this week.

SPEAKER_03 21:48

That's what I said, and that's why she should get a drink to take the edge off.

SPEAKER_06 21:52

You were saying to me earlier that you were tired and you were gonna come.

SPEAKER_03 21:55

We don't have to go to like a super loud packed spot. We could go to like a chill spot where we could just hang out.

SPEAKER_06 22:00

Yeah, alright. I mean I'll come.

SPEAKER_03 22:03

Yeah, no, I know you're coming.

SPEAKER_04 22:04

Well yeah, but I just want to easy like um No, I'll I've uh yeah, you can hang back, but I'll hang out.

SPEAKER_03 22:11

How about we make it even easier? We could just make it the two of us.

SPEAKER_06 22:14

Yeah, I'm fine with it being the two of us. The two of us can hang. Was I looking at you? Oh, well, sh Sam doesn't want to hang out tonight, but I do. Is that what you said? That was kind of a couple of the things she was saying was kind of inferring that.

SPEAKER_04 22:30

Yeah, I'm not feeling it tonight, though. So you know what night would you be feeling it?

SPEAKER_06 22:36

Um I said I was not done.

SPEAKER_04 22:40

Yeah. I mean, uh to be honest, I just I don't I don't think I I'm not like interested.

SPEAKER_03 22:46

You know you could check your calendar.

SPEAKER_06 22:49

Sam, I forgot uh we have to go over the the files uh for this uh the f full week before you go uh home tonight. Do you mind going over that now while I finish my my uh Caesar salad? I thought you said you checked the files already. I don't yeah, I did more key. Am I reading this wrong? I thought you don't want to have sex with this guy.

SPEAKER_04 23:11

Oh, oh no, I don't. But I thought we did the files already. I was trying to save you from.

SPEAKER_03 23:16

You thought I was trying to have sex with you? No, I Oh my god, I am so sorry. That's not what I was saying at all.

SPEAKER_04 23:24

Well, how about the both of you share me right now? We're so off the rails.

SPEAKER_02 23:37

I tried so many ways to get you out of that scene.

SPEAKER_06 23:40

I'm just trying to get help.

SPEAKER_04 23:42

That's that's what I wanted to throw in. Like, the files are done, man.

SPEAKER_06 23:47

I'm like, wait, she thinks I'm hitting on her. And I noticed I came in when he touched you. Yeah. I'm like doing everything I can to help. Someone oblivious to you helping? Yeah. The files, or there's no files. Alright, I'm the girl this time, and he's the advancer. Okay. All right. And you're having uh more of like a cob salad. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 24:15

All right. Um are you, Peter?

SPEAKER_06 24:21

Good.

SPEAKER_08 24:21

You did something with your hair?

SPEAKER_06 24:23

Oh, yeah. I haven't showered. Ooh. Yeah. Good. I like uh get it all messy so I can spike it because I I if you notice I chopped it all off. You did? Yeah. Like a pixie cut.

SPEAKER_04 24:36

Ooh. Yeah. Uh like a manic pixie dream girl.

SPEAKER_06 24:39

Uh oh yeah, yeah, I've heard that before. Yeah. Yeah. That's like a term, right?

SPEAKER_04 24:44

For yeah, in movies, that's like when a uh like a girl that's like shows up and she's quirky and whatever, and that's like the answer to like the awkward guy's life. You know what I mean? Oh, sure. Yeah. It's like become like a stereotype of like a poorly written character or whatever. Oh, okay. Yeah. But you're not.

SPEAKER_06 25:02

I'll try to uh thank you. You're cool. Yeah. All right, well.

SPEAKER_04 25:10

Uh you smell good too.

SPEAKER_06 25:12

Oh, thank thanks.

SPEAKER_04 25:14

What was that? Jasmine tea? Uh let me get a sip. Yes, do I smell good? Huh?

SPEAKER_03 25:21

Do I smell good? I have a new cologne.

SPEAKER_04 25:27

That's pretty good.

SPEAKER_03 25:28

It's jasmine tea.

SPEAKER_04 25:30

No. Yeah. That's how Jasmine.

SPEAKER_03 25:32

You're picking up his scent. Jasmine tea.

SPEAKER_04 25:34

What? That was you?

SPEAKER_03 25:35

Yeah, you're into this.

SPEAKER_04 25:37

Oh, it's crazy. Uh, but yeah, you're that smells good too. But um Ashley. Why'd you just mouth? You just mouth thank you to him.

SPEAKER_06 25:50

That because I've I didn't look feel comfortable and he came in at the right time.

SPEAKER_04 25:58

Why don't you feel comfortable?

SPEAKER_06 26:00

Uh you said. Are you wearing anything? Come here, let me smell you. Wait, wait, wait, stop. You said you wanted to slurp me up, and that that was the moment for me where I wasn't sure what you kind of meant by that.

SPEAKER_04 26:11

Sorry, I'm sorry. I I mean it like I mean, obviously I think you're attractive.

SPEAKER_06 26:15

Oh, thank yeah, thank you.

SPEAKER_04 26:17

And when I say like drink you up, I don't it's like me being creepy silly, but I'm not actually like that.

SPEAKER_03 26:24

It sounds like you're just being creepy.

SPEAKER_04 26:27

Can I talk to I'm just having a conversation with Ashley if you're I mean if you can be not creepy, sure. I but I she was having fun. Like we were having a good time chatting, right? Ashley, were you having a good time?

SPEAKER_06 26:40

I I was, and then it started to get a little silly.

SPEAKER_03 26:42

Yeah, everyone has a good time when you speak to them in that tone. That's a real fun tone that you got there.

SPEAKER_04 26:48

Can you watch her tone when you're talking to me, first of all? Okay?

SPEAKER_03 26:52

Is it not fun enough for you?

SPEAKER_04 26:54

Well, you're obviously being kind of you're kind of being sarcastic.

SPEAKER_03 26:58

Oh, so you can read a situation. It's interesting that you didn't pick up that she was uncomfortable then.

SPEAKER_04 27:03

There was no discomfort here. Okay? She's laughing, she's talking back, she's playing with her hair, you know? And smile she's smiling.

SPEAKER_03 27:11

How about you let her answer if she's uncomfortable?

SPEAKER_04 27:13

Yeah. Are you uncomfortable?

SPEAKER_06 27:15

Well, it's five o'clock. Uh you see?

SPEAKER_04 27:19

She didn't say yes.

SPEAKER_03 27:20

No, I And that's how you should take it. That's how you should answer the situation.

SPEAKER_06 27:28

I uh I neither of us saved well. No.

SPEAKER_03 27:40

We didn't save well because the truth was we would just walk out of the room. It was very confrontational.

SPEAKER_04 27:44

It's definitely more confrontational.

SPEAKER_06 27:45

Yeah, I was trying to give you exits when I was.

SPEAKER_04 27:48

You're the guy I wish I was. But she just didn't want to take when I was playing her. She just didn't want to take the exits.

SPEAKER_06 27:54

Yours was just, hey, look, buddy. Which uh I found very attractive.

SPEAKER_04 28:04

All right, so we got one left, right?

SPEAKER_06 28:06

Oh yeah, so you're you're the girl.

SPEAKER_04 28:08

You're the girl, and I'm the advancer, and I'm here to save the day.

SPEAKER_03 28:13

Okay, yeah. And I'm having you're you're having you're gonna have a tuna melt.

SPEAKER_04 28:19

Yeah, this is a tuna melt provolone cheese.

SPEAKER_03 28:22

All right.

SPEAKER_06 28:22

All right. Uh hey Brittany, how's it going? Hey, Steve, how are you? Oh, I'm good. Uh, you know, thank God it's uh Wednesday.

SPEAKER_03 28:32

I know, almost there.

SPEAKER_06 28:34

Yeah, hump day.

SPEAKER_03 28:36

That's what they say. It's so weird. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 28:44

Uh he's eating in between us.

SPEAKER_02 28:48

It's very distracting.

SPEAKER_04 28:55

I wasn't even I wasn't even eating funny.

SPEAKER_06 28:57

I know, no, you weren't, but I'm like trying to be creepy around your eye. Alright, let's really do it. I want to I want to see how you would say uh yeah. You know, I think they call it uh hump day because that's the only way to get you through the rest of the week, you know?

SPEAKER_04 29:21

Whoa.

SPEAKER_07 29:23

Sorry.

SPEAKER_03 29:24

Oh, you mean like by sex? Oh, I don't think that's what it means.

SPEAKER_06 29:30

Oh that's kind of weird. I I no, I saw it on a meme somewhere. Oh uh but anyways, you're you're looking good.

SPEAKER_04 29:39

Oh this sounds like a conversation between you two, and I'm gonna leave.

SPEAKER_03 29:48

You guys are ruining my lunch.

SPEAKER_05 30:00

That was just you ramped up from zero to I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 30:03

I didn't I I don't know how to be creepy. No.

SPEAKER_04 30:07

Well, forget about creepy. Just do regular Steven Fleur.

SPEAKER_06 30:10

Alright, I'll try to flip flirt. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Uh let me just put a picture of someone in front of your face. They say doing it for you. Um Hey Brittany, how's it going? Hey, Steve, how are you? Oh, I'm good, you know. Just carrying this place on my back. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 30:35

I gotta be honest, if that was the response I got, I'd be out of the day.

SPEAKER_06 30:46

That is when I I have no harassment in terms of. Yeah. I'm done.

SPEAKER_01 31:00

Oh, man.

SPEAKER_04 31:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 31:04

I guess you know. I've it's weird because I've only worked in I mean, people in comedy hook up a lot, you know. Uh and I would say most of it's all fine and like I've only ever been in comedy and then in restaurants, and it's the same in restaurants where it's like everybody's hooking up everybody's hooking up with everybody.

SPEAKER_04 31:26

So it's a very kind of loose uh you know it it the what's appropriate, the the boundaries of being appropriate it expands.

SPEAKER_03 31:35

Oh my god, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 31:36

So in comedy, you can kind of get away with a lot more as a guy. You can kind of go up to females and just say whatever.

SPEAKER_06 31:44

Well, I don't know about that, but you can't.

SPEAKER_03 31:46

I disagree with that wholeheartedly, and I hope you will too. I think you can like comics talk to each other in a way that already would not be appropriate in like a regular workplace.

SPEAKER_06 31:58

Yeah, there's no advances involved. Yes. Even if there's no flirtation involved, we're being inappropriate.

SPEAKER_03 32:04

That's what I'm saying. So like I think it makes the line a little bit harder because in corporate HR they probably have like you don't talk about these things, it's like performing overseas, like no religion, no sex, no this, no whatever. And uh, but yeah, we don't have that. So it's no so it's tough, you know.

SPEAKER_06 32:22

When I worked at the grocery store, people would date each other uh apparently. Uh so I've heard. I guess I've never experienced that, but there were uh a lot of people like cashiers dating or people dating other uh sections of the store.

SPEAKER_04 32:38

I think every workplace has oh like other sections would like cross-pollinate?

SPEAKER_06 32:43

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like uh wow Meet Bradley, I saw you stocking the meat, frozen and dairy. That that'll never last. They're horoscopes. You're dating a cart pusher? That was a cart pusher. Uh yeah, I I think that's like the number one place people meet. I think still is well it's now it's online.

SPEAKER_03 33:09

Now it's online. It used to be, yeah, it used to be like through your family and your community, and then it was like it was like workplace. Like workplace, workplace and friends kind of went back and forth for a little bit, and then I forget the year. I've I saw like a a graph over time, and then you see like online just start to write like from match.com and all that, and then and then it hits whenever dating apps came out, and it's just fucking and now it's mostly dating apps, which is crazy.

SPEAKER_04 33:40

Yeah. So you know, but it makes work make sense though, like for the what time it did. And and I think it's still it's still, yeah. It makes sense. You're just around them and you're kind of put in these situations.

SPEAKER_06 33:53

I'm surprised that's never been a part of an HR talk. I know they talk about dating in the workplace and stuff, but they're never like, you know, this is most likely where you'll meet your next your part next partner.

SPEAKER_03 34:07

Because that you're kind of given the green light to be like, hey, I'm just trying to, you know.

SPEAKER_04 34:12

I think uh us guys, we need any kind of excuse to be around the woman in a in a kind of organic way. And work lets you do that.

SPEAKER_03 34:26

Let's you pe be in this orbit of her it lets you be in and where maybe you can be a little bit yourself, yeah. And there's no like I think I mean, I know me, I'm the best version of myself when I'm not trying to talk to anybody romantically. So 100%. So it it kind of I think that's why sparks fly at work because you're just you're being your best uh version.

SPEAKER_06 34:51

That reminds me of uh I used to uh work at uh the grocery store and one of the you know you ever have a j like a job that takes you away from your job within the work that everybody wants to do? It's like so for uh the grocery store it was just like going on a journey? Sort of stuff like that, just something separate. Okay, like a side quest in the job. Okay, okay. What was it for for uh the front of the grocery store? It was uh bringing all the boxes of bags to each register, so they had all the bags that they could uh so you would get a dolly, load it up with boxes of bags and go to each register and load them up, open the boxes, put them in. And uh I love doing that uh because I was either friends with the cashiers or thought one of them was cute, and it was just like a little bit of like a stop by, hey, how you doing uh thing. Nice. And uh what would your line be as like that's the problem? I never really planned that.

SPEAKER_04 35:54

Alright, so I'm I'm cute working the thing. All right?

SPEAKER_06 35:58

Well, sometimes they'd have a customer foreshadowing.

unknown 36:03

Beep, beep.

SPEAKER_06 36:05

All right, beep, beep. Hey. Hey Steve. How's it going?

SPEAKER_03 36:10

Good. How are you? These are on sale, right? Uh good.

SPEAKER_06 36:13

These are yeah.

SPEAKER_04 36:14

So you get two of these for $4.99. Okay, I thought that was the coupon that I had.

SPEAKER_06 36:18

Uh yeah, I'm doing good. I uh, you know, just uh dropping off the bags, you know.

SPEAKER_03 36:23

Oh can you double can you double bag these?

SPEAKER_04 36:26

Strong boy Steve over. Uh double? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:28

I don't want them to fall through.

SPEAKER_04 36:30

Okay. I got double. Yes. All right. Yeah. Someone likes eggs. Look.

SPEAKER_06 36:46

I was just about I was just about to say, it looks like I got here just in time, and that would have been my line. And that's exactly what would happen. Is your interaction with the the customer, I wouldn't be able to have a window, and then I just have to go to the next person. Oh god. Our scenes are pretty fun today. I'm having some fun in these scenes.

SPEAKER_03 37:09

It's funny because like the the cash registers are like right next to each other, so like you fail at this one. They see they still see you go right next door and yeah.

SPEAKER_06 37:19

You know, I wouldn't be like, I wasn't just like hitting on every girl there. It was just if there was a girl there I found cute. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 37:27

And you're hitting hitting on someone at work is very different than hitting on someone.

SPEAKER_06 37:31

Yeah, really, you're just trying to create rapport. Yes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 37:34

Hey, sunny day.

SPEAKER_06 37:36

Yeah. Yeah. If they let us out.

SPEAKER_04 37:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 37:42

That was uh thing is they people would always talk about the weather inside the grocery store, and I had there's no windows. So you must have related to that.

SPEAKER_04 37:51

Yes. At my at my last job, yeah. Oh, look, uh, what a great oh, it's beautiful outside. Yeah, too bad I'm stuck here.

SPEAKER_06 38:00

Yeah, I won't see that for eight hours. I won't be able to smell the air for quite some time. This was like the Apple store you worked down.

SPEAKER_02 38:09

Right.

SPEAKER_04 38:10

Also, um, fun fact, uh my Apple store was on a second floor of a mall, and so uh there's always there was like a a railing that stopped you, you know. It's it's like the food court. I always picture myself doing a sprint and hopping over.

SPEAKER_06 38:27

I knew I knew when you said fun fact and second floor. He's not staying on this floor.

SPEAKER_04 38:36

Every time I'd look over and I go, I couldn't.

SPEAKER_06 38:39

I felt that with the Mets game last night because we were right up on the railing. Right, and uh they had the t-shirt cannon, and none of them got even remotely close to us, but every time they shot him, and I would look over and I'm like, I wonder if anyone's tried to grab one and fell gone off.

SPEAKER_03 38:58

Yeah. Or just just had a elapse in like in their brain just been like, fuck it, I'm gonna do it. Yeah, yeah, and just jumped.

SPEAKER_06 39:08

But it was a good one I mean, I didn't have that. We had fun, you know.

SPEAKER_03 39:11

I had a hot dog.

SPEAKER_06 39:13

It was nice.

SPEAKER_04 39:16

There was a minute where Taylor wasn't saying anything.

SPEAKER_06 39:18

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 39:20

I saw him draft a text to his mom. Keep looking over, but the cannons were uh over for a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 39:30

Now, uh, real quick, because we don't have a lot of time left. If you were to do it, would you tell any of your loved ones?

SPEAKER_03 39:36

No.

SPEAKER_04 39:36

No?

SPEAKER_06 39:37

And my wife? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 39:39

Before you did it?

SPEAKER_04 39:41

Yeah. No.

SPEAKER_03 39:42

You're just doing it clean and No, because then you tell the and then if you still go through with it, now they live with the fact that they could have done something about it, but either didn't or what they did didn't work.

SPEAKER_04 39:52

What if your thing you send is hey, goodbye, you couldn't have done anything. Bang.

SPEAKER_03 39:56

Oh, you mean like leave a note? You consider that. Yeah. Oh. Um Yeah. Yeah, maybe. I don't know if I would leave like a long note. I'd probably leave like important information.

SPEAKER_04 40:12

Like what?

SPEAKER_03 40:13

You know, here's how you get into my things, and like here's uh passwords and email. Because as someone who's had to find all that on his own, it's nice. As someone who's had to find all that on his own, it's uh it you you really wish somebody would have done that. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 40:35

So you leave their passwords and stuff.

SPEAKER_03 40:38

Yeah. You know, Apple, Verizon, all the all the big ones.

SPEAKER_06 40:44

Well call the hotline if you're feeling anything before. Yeah, don't yeah, the number one don't do it. Don't ever do it.

SPEAKER_04 40:50

Don't do it. But if you were going to, then uh no, no, no note. I think I just think you just do it? Yeah, I think I might meet I might do like one like group message thing. Yeah. And I'll be like, you guys won't believe what I'm about to do. Bang! Then I go.

SPEAKER_06 41:10

Just so like I'd be very no matter what, I'd be upset with you, but I'd be very mad that you did it as a bit.

SPEAKER_03 41:20

What if I left like a like a treasure hunt for you guys? Uh-huh. And then you're the ex to find my body.

SPEAKER_06 41:33

I no, if I were to do it, I would try to make it uh somehow still uh like wow, he's great. So I would maybe try to do it as a sacrifice. You know?

SPEAKER_04 41:50

Like, okay, like you doing it saved a bus full of kids.

SPEAKER_06 41:54

Yep. Like in order for that buzzload of kids to be safe, I have to jump off the railing in the food court. I hate this.

SPEAKER_04 42:09

Yeah. You know, I thought it'd be funny, but oh wait.

SPEAKER_06 42:15

Do not do it, everyone. Are you okay?

SPEAKER_04 42:22

Sorry.

SPEAKER_03 42:23

I just I just try to sneak in at the end there.

SPEAKER_04 42:26

I just read one that was meant for me that I should have been doing, but I didn't realize. What was it? Uh your card asks the same host if they're okay ten times. I forgot about that one.

SPEAKER_06 42:38

Oh, that's a good one. Oh, you should have done that. I should have. That would have been a good one.

SPEAKER_04 42:44

The whole episode that would have been great. Uh I screwed up.

SPEAKER_03 42:48

Um there should be a thing where, like, all right, you have to do this a number of times or whatever, something like that. And then if you get away with it successfully, you get you win something from it. Yeah. Also you get a bonus. You get a bonus by you know getting getting it in. But it can't be too many things because it's it's hard to prove that you actually did it that many times. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 43:14

So maybe if it's like Oh, we have proof right there.

SPEAKER_03 43:17

Uh yeah, I guess. But then that that's you we'd have to figure that out later.

SPEAKER_06 43:20

It's just going out.

SPEAKER_03 43:22

We gotta figure that out like later. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Something we could solve in real time. Anyway, a little insight based on that.

SPEAKER_04 43:30

Um cool. Well, uh why don't we? I mean, it's not the end of the show yet. No. Right? But for now. Um in Astoria with my boys. Look, I'm playing with toys. Hey, like a bunch of Legos. Oh, I'm gonna eat some eggs when I'm gonna go. When I get home, been to Rome. No, I have not. I can't travel.

SPEAKER_06 44:10

So that has been uh alright, you know what? Do it, and I'll try to do one. Alright, okay. You do a B. Had a Caesar salad. Ew, it was great. Tried to interrupt my friend's weird date. He was freaking her out. I can't tell if it gave me cloud.

SPEAKER_04 44:36

I'll say that's leaps and bounds better than the first time we did it. Yeah. That's definitely an improvement. Yeah. I'll take it. Okay. Uh let me do a beat for you now. Okay.

SPEAKER_07 44:47

Boom, boom, chs, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, chs, boom. Alright, that's too powerful.

SPEAKER_03 44:52

Yeah, like I need to you need to prove that you can sustain this.

SPEAKER_06 44:55

It's your birthday. That's exactly what that sounded like.

SPEAKER_03 44:58

I always get the really ambitious beats that fall apart in one bar.

SPEAKER_07 45:03

Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun. You're the one that's doing it. I know I can't do the I can't do both. You can find me in the club Grow of 34s.

SPEAKER_03 45:30

Yo, yo, he he he. Here we are. It's the one, two, three. We are sitting in a chair. One is bald and two have hair. The beat is off. That's okay. I'm gonna keep rapping anyway. Hey, alright. Okay, well. Jesus.

SPEAKER_04 45:47

That's good.

SPEAKER_03 45:48

Uh so uh coming up.

SPEAKER_04 45:52

Folks.

SPEAKER_06 45:53

Oh, your Nataland came out.

SPEAKER_04 45:54

My Nateland came out, so check that out. It is on YouTube if you search Nateland, Peter Wong.

SPEAKER_06 46:01

Olivia loved it. She did? Yeah. She was telling me about it last night.

SPEAKER_04 46:06

Nice. Tell your girlfriend I said thanks. I will.

SPEAKER_03 46:12

I sent it to Jess. I got nothing.

SPEAKER_06 46:17

Uh coming up.

SPEAKER_04 46:19

Um and that's yeah, that's that's that's all that's all. Oh, then we we're on we're doing something. Austin.

SPEAKER_06 46:26

We're in Houston coming up, and then we'll be in Austin together. Uh and uh I don't know where else we're gonna be together. Uh, but we're uh yeah, come to see see us in Texas.

SPEAKER_03 46:44

And see us uh if you're there in London. Yes. Uh at the end of come see us at all the many club spots we'll be doing. You have to chase us around town, that's right.

SPEAKER_05 46:58

Where can we find the show? Stephen Rogers and Taylor Yarish. Hello.

SPEAKER_03 47:07

And that's what you sound like, so why don't you come out and see us?

SPEAKER_06 47:12

It's weird that my headlining tickets and so uh yeah, come see us in London in May. Uh we'll be there June 26th to I'm sorry, May 26th to June. Let's try to figure out May 26th to June 3rd. Yes, and then uh you and I will be in uh Houston and Boston.

SPEAKER_03 47:36

And you and I will be in May. Huh? You and I will be in Boston in June. Ooh. Uh is June or July? June. Is it June? No, it's in August.

SPEAKER_04 47:47

August. It's August 7th and 8th. Man, we gotta figure these out before we do these.

SPEAKER_06 47:51

Yeah, huh? Well, I will be uh in Houston uh May 8th to the 9th with Peter Wong. I'll be in Boston, May 21st to the 23rd with Peter Wong. Yeah, aka the Asian Taylor. Uh England, uh May 26th to June 3rd with Taylor Yarish. AKA the White Peter. Uh and then I'll be at Warp Tour. Uh that's uh the first time I'm saying this on this show. Uh June 13th and 14th. And speaking of Texas, I'll be in Texas, August 19th and 20th at Cap City Comedy Club with Peter Wong. They have a lot of bats there.

SPEAKER_03 48:48

So that's uh been the show. Thanks.