Ep. 025—Wasabi

The boys are back and they talk about perusing records, refilling water bottles at the airport, taking their shirts off, wasabi, and much more! Enjoy!

@taylercomedy

@stevenrogerscomedy

@peterwongcomedy

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

It's gonna be rough.

SPEAKER_03 0:00

I could s no, I don't think uh I think we're already at some gold. Uh yeah, the thrift store thing, you know. Well that was a fun one. That one I was enjoying. That one you didn't. You ever been to that one? What? The swim one you didn't. Swim one, I'm curious because your tone changed, and you would know more about this than I do. Yeah. Can I switch can I swim lamps with my Apple Watch? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. There's a I bet there's a swim option. Yeah, but you you went higher.

SPEAKER_01 0:37

No, it's fine. Yeah, you can swim with a watch. Are we good?

SPEAKER_04 0:40

If that's what if it doesn't mean anything to you. Right, if I want to get a new watch.

SPEAKER_01 0:46

I could run over my phone with my car. Yeah. Something I can do.

SPEAKER_04 0:52

I'll get you a new one at the thrift store. The buffalo. You got like a charger at the thrift store? No, I didn't get anything. It just kind of looked and stuff. I tell you though, I because it's kind of like it's you know how we'll like go to record stores and stuff and and it's just the perusing. Oh, you got records. No, I I did go through the records, but I didn't get anything. I just like looked some stuff. Okay. Okay. But I realized the thing that doesn't happen at the beginning.

SPEAKER_03 1:19

Why don't either of you like this? Because it's entertaining me so much.

SPEAKER_01 1:23

I milked all I can out of it. You're looking for a couple more drops. Yeah, I am. Four or five of them happened before. I was in the desert all day.

SPEAKER_04 1:32

I got no one to talk to. Four or five of them happened before we hit record, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 1:37

That's when I got my milk.

SPEAKER_04 1:40

I was uh I was like looking through shirts, and you look through them the same way you would, like, you know, you just kind of go in a little bit, and there's a whole like there's a whole row of shirts, and I'm going left to right, and there's another guy a little bit further down. The other side? Oh, and he's behind you. He's he's on the same rack, but he's a little bit further down, he's also going left to right. But his case is a little bit faster than mine. And I'm starting to like feel the pressure.

SPEAKER_03 2:07

He's like the the killer, and you have a limp.

SPEAKER_04 2:11

Yeah. I'm starting to cut out, like, all right, skip everything that's orange. Uh like I like try to find reasons to throwing shirts behind you. Yeah, I'm trying to like push it, like, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:30

At the end of it's a it's a door and you can't get your keys in.

SPEAKER_04 2:33

Oh fuck, I'll just buy this. His finger gets stuck in a in a button down. No! Yeah, it was uh it was like I'm not it was gonna make me upset because I'm like, there's no way you're even looking at these wait. You think he's doing it because you're it's like he's trying to find a specific shirt that like somebody stole from him or something and gave to the thrift store. You know, he was just literally going so fast.

SPEAKER_03 2:58

Yeah. I don't like when um it's uh it happens a lot with records, but I'm sure there's other spots where you're looking through and you you just feel the person wait. Sometimes they just stand there and wait for you to be done. And then I'm like, well, this whole this that the record I want in here and I'm not gonna get it. I can't flip over to the other side and the other side of this record. I can't go to any other thing. I need to go through the N's and the M's right now. Right now as this guy's looking through it slowly.

SPEAKER_01 3:26

So wait, so someone will show up while you're looking through a specific section, yeah, and they'll line up behind you while everything else is open.

SPEAKER_03 3:34

Yeah, what I'll do is I'll go to the one next to it and pretend I'm looking.

SPEAKER_01 3:39

And wait till he's done.

SPEAKER_03 3:40

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 3:41

How come you don't tell them?

SPEAKER_04 3:46

Well, it's the uh it's not like a gym where it's like there's the bench press. Like you could you could because you you want to give them the time to do exactly what you want to do.

SPEAKER_01 3:56

I wanna Why don't you say, just so you know I'm gonna be a while.

SPEAKER_03 3:59

I want to act this out, but I want to make it as real as possible. So no hidden. All right, you're the am I the am I the looker or am I the waiter?

SPEAKER_01 4:09

I think you're the you're the you're the looker because you're you. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 4:13

Okay. Alright, so I'm looking through records.

SPEAKER_01 4:15

Yeah. And are you going to speak up? Like you're gonna all right, you know what? Uh all right, you know, you're you're not part of this. How about this? We're gonna do it. Yes, okay. I like this, yeah. So you're Steven and I'm a guy waiting, okay? I just walk I just walked into another one.

SPEAKER_03 4:39

That's how I do it.

SPEAKER_04 5:00

Do you oh do you need a are you are you looking for?

SPEAKER_01 5:03

Oh yeah, yeah, whenever you're done, I'm just like looking at it.

SPEAKER_04 5:06

Oh, okay, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's easy.

SPEAKER_01 5:09

Just go. Just go.

SPEAKER_04 5:11

Yeah, yeah, no, you can look.

SPEAKER_01 5:13

Okay, well you're finished.

SPEAKER_04 5:15

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 5:16

Are you sure? Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 5:17

Yeah, yeah, go ahead.

SPEAKER_01 5:18

You're I I'm detecting a little bit there's there's a little bit of attitude that you're giving me.

SPEAKER_04 5:23

No.

SPEAKER_00 5:27

Why would you say that? All right, fine.

SPEAKER_04 5:31

I would not even let it get to I'd be like, what? Just look. I'm detecting a little bit.

SPEAKER_03 5:37

How who's the bad guy here if uh I get I sit because how long do you take?

SPEAKER_01 5:45

Is it possible you take too long?

SPEAKER_03 5:47

No, sometimes there's there's big sections. I don't like no. I I resent you even putting this in there. No, I don't take too long. I don't like this. But who's the bad guy here if they are behind you, kind of letting you know that they're waiting? I wouldn't what I would do is I just let them go. But what who's bad if I get right behind him and start waiting? Like he did. Definitely you.

SPEAKER_04 6:17

Me? It's passive aggressive, for sure.

SPEAKER_03 6:20

I need to wait.

SPEAKER_04 6:22

To be like to step out. Man, I was hoping I was hoping I struck on something. I always feel that at a water fountain. You know? You're drinking from a water fountain and you could just feel someone right here.

SPEAKER_03 6:34

Yeah, you're just the the airport uh water bottle. I swear to God, I must be the person that reminds everyone in the airport that that exists. Because there I look. No one's there. I don't even see anybody like getting theirs out. Yeah. And then I I I right as I hear a drip, I look and there's three people with their own.

SPEAKER_01 7:00

It's like when I you uh you hope you ruffle a bag of treats and then you look behind you. There are three dogs.

SPEAKER_04 7:07

I'll take out, I'll have like a re uh or a just like a disposable plastic water bottle and I'll fill that up, and then I'll also have my canteen because I drink a lot of water. Well, that pisses me off. I know that is bad. I I'll have like a water bottle like that that I'm filling up, and I can see people be like, oh, we'll be in and out of here. You know, and then I bring out a hydroblast.

SPEAKER_01 7:27

And it's not that you're doing anything wrong, even. It's just that we didn't know that there was more.

SPEAKER_03 7:33

I I almost think he should get out of line with the second water bottle.

SPEAKER_01 7:37

That's crazy. It is crazy, but if a per can you imagine a person second in line, he does one bottle, walks to the back, and lines behind her. Yeah. And she goes, What the fuck?

SPEAKER_04 7:50

That's like you go through a drive-thru, like, let me get uh four burgers, three lunch fries, two night cokes, and I'll be back.

SPEAKER_03 7:59

That's just for me. And then I got order for somebody else.

SPEAKER_04 8:04

Come back around.

SPEAKER_03 8:05

That's fair.

SPEAKER_01 8:06

But it is like, yeah, I think for me, I I just I'm irrationally upset at that person. I'm not necessarily like, you know, in my in my most right mind, I'm like, well, they it doesn't matter. It's a second bottle. But at that moment, I'm like, that's that's annoying.

SPEAKER_04 8:22

It's almost like I'm mad at life in this moment, yes, and not mad at this person. It's like, oh, the road is flooded.

SPEAKER_03 8:29

It's like well, that's just what's happening. Yes, exactly. I'm about to bring a game to the table, but I only have the pieces, I don't have it put together. But what is the one instance in your in life where you you don't want to go, oh come on. And uh you don't want to say that you don't want to do that, but you're stuck like I want the you have I would you rather have two options of those where you have to say oh come on. I'm trying to think of the two worst ones.

SPEAKER_04 9:01

A place where like if you said oh come on, it would put you in a really yes uh well there's um laughing.

SPEAKER_01 9:12

Uh I'm just excited there's a bagger at my Trader Joe's Okay or um worker there and they they ring out N Bag and unfortunately she is not uh she's got something with her arm and she's smaller.

SPEAKER_03 9:36

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 9:37

She's smaller?

SPEAKER_01 9:38

Yeah. She's a little person? No. Um I'd say she's short. Shorter than me. I can tell it's a condition that's caused her to be that way.

SPEAKER_03 9:49

Oh, maybe like a premature situation or something like that.

SPEAKER_01 9:53

It also causes her arm to bend.

SPEAKER_03 9:56

And she's cannot laugh at that. What do you mean it bends? All arms bend.

SPEAKER_01 10:02

But like like this. It's per it's a permanent. Yeah, like that.

SPEAKER_03 10:05

And she begs.

SPEAKER_01 10:06

She's doing everything one-handed? She's doing everything one-handed. Holy crap. Sweet lady. Yeah. You know? Um, I'm when they call the number and it's her, I I don't like it. I wish it wasn't. Because there's a moment.

unknown 10:20

Oh, come on.

SPEAKER_01 10:23

Let the lady behind me go. You know what? Why don't you go ahead? I'm feeling generous today. Yeah, go for it. But um, and then that is a part of me where it does make me it shakes. I have to shake myself to go, well, it's good that she has a job and is uh here and but is this frustration because you think she's gonna like mishandle your groceries, or is it just gonna take long? It's gonna take long. It usually takes three times to four times as long.

SPEAKER_04 10:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 10:48

But it's great.

SPEAKER_04 10:50

Could you ever go up and be like, why don't I just tell you what I have and you can just punch it into the computer? You can't do that.

SPEAKER_01 10:56

You know, some of them you got away.

SPEAKER_03 10:59

Yeah, there's there's no they don't have that. I don't know what master computer you think is behind the cash register, but they don't have well sometimes when you can't scan, you you go peep beep boop boop, right?

SPEAKER_01 11:10

It's uh you know, hey, what's the onion? Oh, oh yeah, produce only. Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 11:15

Oh, but like a bag of chips you can never No, that unless some things they would have a a booklet, but uh the booklet would have like it's like bags of ice, something that you're gonna go get after you cash out.

SPEAKER_04 11:28

Okay, all right. You would think they would make her the person who's like go to number 13.

SPEAKER_01 11:33

Yeah, uh sometimes she is. Yeah. Um, and uh that's that's a good day. I'm very happy for that. Um but yeah, sometimes she's my bagger and cashier. Um and that's fine. Yeah. You know, but I damn like I have like, come on, be a good Peter. This is you look how fortunate you are. Yeah, look at where she is.

SPEAKER_03 11:59

Well, uh, it seems like you're practicing all the right things mentally.

SPEAKER_01 12:04

Yeah, sure.

SPEAKER_04 12:06

Do you think that they would uh say anything? Like if they're like, alright, go to number 13. If you're like, I'll get the next one. Do you think that the per the person would be like uh You think the person who I let go to the next one? Or just the person who tells you, like, hey, 13's open, you're like that would be yeah, that'd be rough.

SPEAKER_01 12:29

You know, I I wouldn't like I if I was them, I wouldn't like that.

SPEAKER_03 12:33

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The grocery store I worked at, they didn't have well, they had a little bit of that, but that is if it was crazy busy. Uh-huh. But what we typically had was people walk by your aisle, look at who the cashier is, and then make their decision that way. Which yeah, which some people would get a lot of people. Uh-huh. I would try to look the least appetizing. I would try to look I was miserable, but I would try to look like not a good time. Uh-huh. And and like you have a seat on the bus next to you. Yes, yes, exactly.

SPEAKER_02 13:12

Oh, the guy who pats the seat.

SPEAKER_03 13:13

Yeah. And then one time, I think this is gonna be right up your alley. One time I was at the seven items or less line, and a woman came in with more, and she caught me counting. You went I wasn't going like that, but I was like looking, and she goes, Are you counting the idols? No, I'm trying to think if I left the stove on.

SPEAKER_01 13:38

Now, aren't you supposed to be counting? That's the whole thing.

SPEAKER_03 13:41

Here's the thing with me in a rule. I mean, of course I'll pick and choose, uh, because I'm a great guy, but if I'm the cashier at the seven items or less and you come in with more, I'm not gonna I'm probably not gonna say anything, but I don't like it. And I'll let you know. Uh-huh. And just kind of like my aura. But uh that one I it was like a a few more, and I was like, well, you know, it's seven items or less. And she's like, Oh, they told me to come down here. And how convenient.

SPEAKER_04 14:12

I'd be like, so can you not count or can you not read? Which one is it?

SPEAKER_03 14:19

What do you mean you want my manager?

SPEAKER_01 14:27

How come they don't make a uh 50 items or more line?

SPEAKER_03 14:35

And if I didn't like the person, I would count their 12 pack of soda.

SPEAKER_04 14:42

My uh moment where I wouldn't want to say, oh, come on, I wouldn't encounter it anymore, but when I was waiting tables and going to pick up the check as uh as they're going to leave. Like they've paid and they've signed the check and I see the tip.

SPEAKER_03 14:59

You you would look right away.

SPEAKER_04 15:02

Uh not obviously, but yeah, you it's very easy to see, you know. Yeah. It was a it was a thing you would just uh most people would just circle the percentage because the printed the percentages out.

SPEAKER_01 15:12

So I've seen you so you've gotten stiff tips.

SPEAKER_04 15:15

I've gotten stiffed before, but I don't say anything. Uh-huh. But I would like to say something.

SPEAKER_01 15:20

Really? So how what's that? So how when you were working at a restaurant out of the way, how many people left no tip?

SPEAKER_04 15:29

Well, I I worked at the restaurant and a hotel, so we had a lot of people come in from other places, so maybe there they don't tip. Yeah. But sometimes you're like, this feels like a you don't know the customs, but then sometimes you're like, you honestly, I think everybody should know. Like, if I'm going to another place, that's like the first question I'm gonna ask if I'm gonna go to a restaurant. What is the tipping culture?

SPEAKER_03 15:52

Right. Crazy to uh stiff you on the tip, but also include the room they're staying in.

SPEAKER_01 15:58

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 15:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

Like he's gonna do something. That would be crazy.

SPEAKER_03 16:04

Yeah. Here's uh two percent tip, and I'm in 303. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 16:09

Well, that's another thing that would happen is that people who would be like, Oh, but you could charge it to the room, but they would kind of just sign for it like oh, I'm just signing to the room, you know? And so they might think like I I don't know, I'd like to give people the benefit of the doubt, but at the same time, you know, it's it's pretty it's pretty shitty.

SPEAKER_01 16:34

What what what's like a sign like where were the where what places people come from where they don't tip?

SPEAKER_04 16:42

Well, uh, I didn't really engage in conversation that much, so I didn't know where they were coming in from. Oh, okay. So it's hard to tell. But if you were to look at them. I know, but if I were to look at them, but you said judging based off solely on their clothes. No, I'm just saying because they're in a hotel. Oh, they're from other places, we would get a lot of hotel. I could tell that if you were a hotel guest or not, because you're charging to the hotel. Oh yeah. So uh, you know, if you happen to do that and looked a certain way.

SPEAKER_01 17:13

Uh it really is obviously it's something you would never bring up. Because it's just you just don't.

SPEAKER_04 17:19

You can't, you yeah, you can't bring that up. But I only really dealt with that for uh it wasn't that long at De Bruzen because I was promoted to manager way too quickly. I should not have had the job.

SPEAKER_01 17:37

You know, uh that reminds me of one time, you know, I was in a little theater production and um we all went out to eat at Applebee's, and then uh it came time for everyone to pay. And then so we're all paying this percentage plus the tip, and then uh one girl goes, uh, I don't tip, and then she just puts the amount without the tip. And none of us said anything. We just what we just didn't know how to confront that. We were like 20.

SPEAKER_04 18:12

She was just so confident that you were like, Wow.

SPEAKER_01 18:16

Wow, yeah, and then we just had to make up for her not tip. And all I could think was what a bitch. I just I really hated her.

SPEAKER_04 18:30

I don't know why I thought something profound was coming right there. And all I could think was, what happened when you were young?

SPEAKER_03 18:36

It's funny because they like there's no what could she say to justify it? Like, oh, I don't tip because it like there's no she said it like when I'm a vegetarian, like yeah, I don't do that. I find tippings really cruel to the staff, so I don't I don't do it.

SPEAKER_01 18:52

Like there's no she's just she's just uh cheap. I mean, you might principally not agree on tipping. Yeah, it's like that reservoir dog's like uh conversation in a certain is like I don't tip. That's what Steve Buscemi says, because the you know, here's the tiniest violin for the for all the waitresses that don't get tipped, you know. But then the rest the guy's like you fucking tip, I'm paying. And he's like, Alright, only because you're paying, you know. But that girl didn't give a shit. Her principal, which I think she's just cheap, she just doesn't want to. And I'm cheap, but not as cheap as I am a person that cares about what people think. Yeah, yep.

SPEAKER_04 19:30

You know, you can you can be like, listen, I don't think it should be structured this way, and I think that the restaurants should just pay them a wage so that we don't have to make up for the difference. Yeah, like you should just be getting a a salary and not a that's you could do that, but you still in the meantime, while it is this way, you're just taking money right out of their pocket.

SPEAKER_01 19:52

You're taking money out of our pockets.

SPEAKER_04 19:54

Yeah, well, but yeah, both. Yeah, that's that's true.

SPEAKER_01 19:57

But your waitress is getting the money no matter what. But it our pockets I get.

SPEAKER_04 20:02

I almost wouldn't have made up for it, but it's a little bit less because of that girl right there.

SPEAKER_01 20:07

She did not That would be great. But if that happens to me again, I'm gonna put ketchup on the person on their clothes. That's not bad. Yeah. If there's ketchup, yeah, just a little quick. There you go.

SPEAKER_04 20:21

If they say like how quickly after they're like, yeah, I don't really tip.

SPEAKER_01 20:25

I go, I'll say if you don't tip, I'm gonna put ketchup on your give them a warning. Yeah, I'll give them a warning.

SPEAKER_04 20:30

And then what if they're just like Peter?

SPEAKER_03 20:33

Come on.

SPEAKER_01 20:34

I go, I'm I'm sorry, but I'm serious.

SPEAKER_03 20:36

What if it's one of those ketchups that's glass and it takes a long time to get it out of the box?

SPEAKER_01 20:42

And I'll probably finger it so that I get the ketchup on my finger and then I'll put it on the clothing. On the clothes. Because that's hard to get out. And it'll probably cost more than what you're not tipping.

SPEAKER_03 20:53

Well, I would do mustard.

SPEAKER_01 20:55

I feel like I probably couldn't the where I eat, I there's ketchup readily available.

SPEAKER_03 21:01

Where I'm taking a woman. And it's in a squirt bottle. Yeah. Where I'm taking a woman. I have packets of ketchup at my disposal.

SPEAKER_01 21:11

When I'm at Rutt Hut in New Jersey. Shout out. Known for the rippers, the hot dogs. They're called rippers because have you been there? No. They deep fry the hot dogs until they rip. So they're called rippers.

SPEAKER_03 21:25

I just got deja vu. So either we've we probably told you this before. Yeah, because you said it the same way. Have we talked about it on the show?

SPEAKER_01 21:35

No. No, but I've said this to you probably. Yeah. It's one of my favorite things to say. Deep fry it until they rip.

SPEAKER_03 21:41

I think, yeah. I think it just him being able to say that sentence. I don't think he waited till today to say it to me. Yeah. That's why that's why he took me there.

SPEAKER_01 21:54

Yeah, we went on our wait on our way to Church of Satire Monday, and then we I was like, I'm gonna make a Stop. And that stop is early, by the way. Still, it's fine. It's New Jersey and then three more hours. Yeah. Yeah. So we stopped. That was my friend came by. And we uh went in there and then uh he's like, What is this? So I was like, This place is known for the ripper. It's called that because they deep fry the hot dogs till they rip.

SPEAKER_04 22:19

Um and were you like this after? I'd be like, I was I I I don't even think it hit me. That's it. That was a weird way to say that. I was probably like, oh, interesting. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03 22:31

I think the first time you don't catch it.

SPEAKER_01 22:33

Yeah. So it's uh obviously you get there, I don't even think you got the ripper because he saw something on the menu. Said uh roast beef sandwich or roast beef.

SPEAKER_04 22:42

And also I was like, it's 11 a.m. I like I I don't know if I can do a deep fried hot dog right now.

SPEAKER_03 22:50

That's true, you would have to left early. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:54

But we we can we're not going there on the way back, so we gotta go at 11. On the way back's the better move. But it's like 2 a.m. on the way back.

SPEAKER_03 23:03

Oh, that's fair. Yeah. So oh, you left after the show.

SPEAKER_01 23:07

Yeah. So we uh well, that's what we did. Did we all and then but well I got a ripper. You looked at there was a menu item, I think it was like a roast pork sandwich for a dollar fifty, and you said I gotta see what that is.

SPEAKER_04 23:18

Oh, yeah. I was like, I have to see that. Like it a sandwich for a dollar fifty. It was not good, but it wasn't bad either.

SPEAKER_01 23:32

This is how was it for you, honey? You had another ad read that hurts the company more than it helps. I recommend the Ripper. I had a great time.

SPEAKER_04 23:44

Uh it is just my vibe because it's like an old It's a place of novelty.

SPEAKER_03 23:47

Like you go in, you're like, this is uh like the burger spot on the on the way to that gig uh in Cincinnati.

SPEAKER_04 23:57

With the screen door?

SPEAKER_01 23:58

Yes, yes, exactly. Yep.

SPEAKER_03 24:00

Yeah, he remembered it faster and he wasn't there.

SPEAKER_01 24:03

Yeah, it took me a second. But yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That that like that. Yeah. And uh, and you know, like a nice old bar, all that.

SPEAKER_04 24:12

And it feels like the people in there have like never left. Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_01 24:16

They're they're in they're attached.

SPEAKER_03 24:18

They're part yeah, part they're part of it. Yeah, like uh Davy Jones' ship. Yeah, part of the crew, part of the ship.

SPEAKER_01 24:24

Ah, you think you're in a ghost story. What is it that he said?

SPEAKER_03 24:28

You best start believing in ghost stories, Miss Turner. You are you're in one. Let's uh spin the wheel. Different movie though. Uh yeah, let's spin it. Ready? Go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 24:48

Ten push-ups. I really didn't want that one. I'll see you later. All right, Steve's doing two push-ups right first.

SPEAKER_01 24:56

And this is we all have to do this. Yeah, two, three, four. I hit the gym today. Five, five, six, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

SPEAKER_04 25:07

All right, let's spin again.

SPEAKER_03 25:09

There you go. Oh, we're all doing ten?

SPEAKER_04 25:11

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 25:13

Nice. All right, Peter's Peter's doing push-ups. One, two, three, four, four, five, six, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

SPEAKER_04 25:33

All right, didn't catch that. All right, this is great content.

SPEAKER_03 25:37

Yeah. One, two, three, three, four, yeah, whatever. Five, six, seven. But he does more. Eight, nine.

SPEAKER_01 25:50

I well, he went six, six. Yeah, that threw me off. Once you stop counting, once you count it twice, I'm screwed.

SPEAKER_03 25:58

Yeah, you did eleven.

SPEAKER_01 26:00

Uh, you know, while we're here. I brought uh a tube of wasabi, and I thought it'd be great for us to do uh uh a a shot of it off of our hand. Okay. All right. Have you had wasabi before?

SPEAKER_04 26:14

Uh I've never seen how it comes.

SPEAKER_01 26:17

Oh yeah. Uh hold your hand out.

SPEAKER_04 26:20

You can do it right here.

SPEAKER_03 26:24

Are we doing it at the same time? Yeah. Oh, that's that's a lot.

SPEAKER_04 26:31

That's it.

SPEAKER_03 26:32

Okay. I'm not brushing my teeth.

unknown 26:39

All right.

SPEAKER_03 26:41

What we should have to talk right after though.

SPEAKER_01 26:44

Yeah, sure. We'll we'll we'll talk about uh our day or something, okay? On three, one, two, two, three.

SPEAKER_04 26:53

So I was on the web.

SPEAKER_01 27:01

Anyways. I went nowhere. That hit me like a ton of bricks.

SPEAKER_03 27:20

Oh my god. I think I have the best spice uh tolerance.

SPEAKER_01 27:25

Hey, no, no way. I'm fine. Really? No, you didn't feel that at all.

SPEAKER_04 27:31

I felt it, but I'm spiced. I get over it. Yeah, it's a different.

SPEAKER_01 27:38

Well, that was that that hit me fast, yeah. I thought I was really gonna try to get through it. Yeah, and hold firm.

SPEAKER_03 27:44

Well, what's funny is we it all kicking at the same time. Yeah, it's all good.

SPEAKER_04 27:49

Ah, wasabi, it's it's weird because it it almost it it hits different depend on like kind of how you ingest it. Like if you take it and then just immediately swallow it, it's not gonna hit you as hard. Like I kind of I flatten my tongue and kind of spread it around. Yes, yes, and then it really hit yeah, I let it.

SPEAKER_03 28:10

It's like airport toiletries. It's under three ounces. Yeah, I need it on the plane. Literally like Photoshop a toothpaste logo on this and ruined someone's day. Oh god.

SPEAKER_00 28:26

Yeah. But it tastes good though. Like it did taste good. It's a good yeah.

SPEAKER_04 28:32

I was trying to say I saw a cop texting on the way here. Oh yeah? Uh while driving. And I uh my stomach hurts.

SPEAKER_03 28:40

I did like a I don't feel great down here.

SPEAKER_01 28:44

Yeah, I think this was obviously reacting with my empty stomach.

SPEAKER_04 28:47

I feel like pretty awake? I feel like cleaned out, like clear. Wait till later. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:54

I bet you could wake someone up with this stuff, right? Like smelling it.

SPEAKER_03 28:57

Yeah, you could. You could also wake them up with a taser. What do you mean?

SPEAKER_01 29:02

Well, is this a that is as powerful as like I think it's the the taste taste or it's the way it's in the mouth. I know your nose has to be involved, but if you saw someone passed out on the sidewalk, yeah, not moving, I bet you could put a little wasabi in his mouth and get get something going.

SPEAKER_04 29:22

I see what you're saying. Oh fight. I'm sure every EMT they they carry that off.

SPEAKER_01 29:28

It's Narcan, but first the wasabi.

SPEAKER_03 29:32

I watched uh I went with uh Shosh to her boyfriend's improv uh oh that was last night. Yeah. And uh I I discovered I didn't know this existed. Do you know what an angel shot is? Yes.

SPEAKER_01 29:47

Yes, that's where if you're afraid you're gonna get a sort of thing.

SPEAKER_04 29:52

If a girl feeling uncomfortable or with a guy that she doesn't, you know, feel comfortable with, she'll go to the bartender and order an angel shot, and that lets him know that you're in duress. Yes. Yeah, I had never heard about it.

SPEAKER_01 30:04

My dates I've ordered that all the time.

SPEAKER_03 30:06

You're like, she's a real alcoholic.

SPEAKER_01 30:11

Right in front of me. I'll have an angel shot.

SPEAKER_03 30:14

That was the scene, it was really great. It was Tony Shosh's boyfriend. Oh, okay, and uh the other uh comic. I don't know what you improviser, uh-huh, played. Uh they're like they just sit down for dinner, and he's like, uh, well, I hope it's you know it's good to go on a date, and he and the waiter comes over and can I get you anything? And the date goes, I'll have an angel shot. He's like, we just sat down.

SPEAKER_04 30:41

That's great. That is the problem with that though, is that everybody knows what that is. Yeah. So it kind of loses you're like you it'd be the same as you're like, hey, this guy's fucking creeping me out over here. Can you do something about it?

SPEAKER_01 30:55

If someone ordered an angel shot and I heard it, I go, I know what that is. I just want you to know that I know that you think you're in danger. You're not.

SPEAKER_04 31:05

I would be like, make that too. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:10

Because she needs two, because she's in that much danger.

SPEAKER_03 31:19

But that's kind of I I mean, I'm glad that that's in place, but you know, you you gotta hope that the restaurant's got good employees.

SPEAKER_04 31:29

Yeah, what is the responsibility there of being like, hey, can I get an angel shot? It's like, are you supposed to fight them now? Or are you like are you just uh what if it's a busy service? Right. I mean, like, I've been in the weeds, and I'm like, I don't think I got a couple other tables. One second. Yeah, I mean, like you just kick them out, like both of you need to leave right now through the back.

SPEAKER_01 31:55

Yeah. Get out of here.

SPEAKER_04 31:56

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, it's uh I've never seen I've never.

SPEAKER_01 32:01

I think you call the police. I think the idea is you call the police. You call 911.

SPEAKER_04 32:07

Yeah. And then and then when they get there, they go, Yeah, she ordered an angel shot. I have no idea what this guy did.

SPEAKER_03 32:14

Well, maybe if it's a nice restaurant, there's this already security.

SPEAKER_01 32:18

I'm the cop. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 32:20

Wow, I'm surprised out of all the parts you could play in this.

SPEAKER_01 32:23

But uh you two uh are in the date. Angel shot has been ordered already.

SPEAKER_03 32:28

Uh who's the girl who's who's the guy?

SPEAKER_01 32:30

You guys figured that out. Okay. Alright. So uh I've showed up. Alright. I heard one of you ordered an angel shot.

SPEAKER_03 32:39

Yes, I did.

SPEAKER_01 32:40

You did?

SPEAKER_03 32:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:41

What an angel shot. Uh someone orders an angel shot when they feel like they're on a date and that they are in danger.

SPEAKER_04 32:52

You ordered an angel shot? I did.

SPEAKER_01 32:54

She did. Now let me ask you something. Are you going to do something for her?

SPEAKER_04 33:02

Well, when you put it like that. No.

SPEAKER_01 33:05

No? Good. All right. No, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_05 33:12

You can't leave me with that.

SPEAKER_01 33:14

I'm gonna be on my way. All right. Well, my work here is done, ma'am. Thanks for checking. You're welcome. And if you ever need to need me, my badge number is 30450. And uh, you know, just not.

SPEAKER_03 33:30

And memorize this face because it will be on a couple of missing posters in two days' time.

SPEAKER_01 33:36

Hey, you're very photogenic. All right, well, let me get out of here.

SPEAKER_03 33:40

Wait, did you just hit on me? I need another cop. Yeah, can I get two of the whole table? Excuse me. I heard one of you uh ordered an angel shot. Yeah, I well, I ordered the guy right next to you first. I ordered one because of him. Yeah, but then this officer. Are you the manager? No, I'm the second cop. Sorry, I I couldn't see uh your badge for a second. Uh I ordered one because of the guy next to you, but then uh are you from the same precinct?

SPEAKER_01 34:14

Do you know it's no you're you're from the one right over town? Yeah, yeah. I recognize you. I recognize you too.

SPEAKER_04 34:20

Yeah, we've hit we've been out on some of the same calls. Yeah, we've played.

SPEAKER_01 34:25

We've played against each other in the volleyball.

SPEAKER_04 34:27

Yes, yeah, you yeah, you got a mean spike.

SPEAKER_01 34:30

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_03 34:32

Speaking of spike, you're thinking of spike. I think this guy puts is gonna do something to me.

SPEAKER_04 34:38

You called an angel shot on this gentleman. Yes, and then this fine, fine officer showed up. Yeah, he's fine.

SPEAKER_01 34:46

You dispute uh I said she looks she's photogenic.

SPEAKER_04 34:50

You said you're you're photogenic. Yeah, you're very photogenic. All right. And then so you ordered a second angel shot to the bartender on the officer.

SPEAKER_03 34:59

Yeah. I feel like I'm in danger, and this officer. Because of what people are saying to you and how you're they're treating you. I feel like I'm in danger. And then this cop came who really hasn't made me feel less in danger.

SPEAKER_04 35:13

So I I gotta be honest, when you leave the house looking like that, I mean, you're really just looking for a little bit of trouble. Well, thank you, Officer Taylor Yerish.

SPEAKER_01 35:23

Why don't we order four regular shots?

SPEAKER_02 35:25

Yeah, we saw this.

SPEAKER_03 35:29

And uh I gotta say that Wasabi is uh found a carpool lane is whipping through traffic right now.

SPEAKER_01 35:41

You're about to shit?

SPEAKER_03 35:43

Not right now, but I think I feel something here. I think it moved up in my calendar. I can tell you that. Okay. My next one.

SPEAKER_04 35:51

I you're good. I see I yeah, I'm I'm fine. I almost feel like it I have a buzz that went like north. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 35:59

Uh but yeah, I'm not feeling I mean, once I hit that, it was like smelling salts. Yes. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 36:04

I I feel like more awake, which is uh sometimes that's what you need. I might look into getting those.

SPEAKER_01 36:11

Wasabi?

SPEAKER_04 36:12

No, smelling salts. Smelling salts? Yeah, that'd be a fun.

SPEAKER_01 36:15

Is that good for you to keep doing smelling salts?

SPEAKER_04 36:17

It's it's one of those things where you shouldn't do it all the time. No. But uh it's a big it's a big weightlifter thing. People do it in the weightlifting community.

SPEAKER_01 36:28

Why don't you use wasabi?

SPEAKER_04 36:30

Um, I think it's a slightly different reaction that's happening. Also, the wasabi, I don't like the idea of it it might upset my stomach. I had a big meal, so it might be like that's true. Working with that, it didn't go right through my but having like wasabi on an empty stomach is probably not or if um you know what also wakes you up?

SPEAKER_01 36:52

If someone pours ice water on your balls, imagine doing that before you work out.

SPEAKER_04 36:57

I've taken a cold shower.

SPEAKER_01 36:58

Yeah. That's essentially that's different, but if like one guy held one leg and another guy held the other.

SPEAKER_03 37:05

It requires two people. Wait, that would mean there's a third guy pouring the ice water. Yeah, there's three guys. Three guys.

SPEAKER_04 37:15

So you're saying instead of doing wasabi, I could do that.

SPEAKER_01 37:18

No, instead of smelling salts.

SPEAKER_04 37:20

Smelling salts. I could do that. I don't know if that I don't think that would do. I really don't think that would do the same thing. Well, we got it only one way to vote. Scott, get in here.

SPEAKER_02 37:32

What do you got? What else I gotta do?

SPEAKER_04 37:35

Doing an ice bucket challenge only on my balls. Uh like the nominate. I challenge!

SPEAKER_01 37:46

I guess ALL stands for ah look, scroed them.

SPEAKER_03 37:59

Did you ever do one of those? I got nominated and I didn't do it.

SPEAKER_01 38:04

Really? You see, that's disease is still around, right?

SPEAKER_04 38:09

How do you feel about that?

SPEAKER_01 38:10

I imagine you were the one missing, and then it would have cured it if you did it. The one missing bucket. I think You know why it's big again, right?

SPEAKER_03 38:22

It's big again?

SPEAKER_01 38:25

I mean the challenge is back. Oh, the challenge is back? Oh, you didn't know that. I did not know that. There's uh a player named Chris Johnson, um, who used to play for the Tennessee Titans, famous for running 2,000 yards in a single season, which is a lot, a lot, a lot. Yeah. And uh just five, six years later, ALS bang. I knew it.

SPEAKER_03 38:49

I knew it.

SPEAKER_01 38:50

Can't move.

SPEAKER_03 38:51

I knew it. I I saw bang coming like two seconds before you did it. ALS bang. It was it was like, oh no, bang.

SPEAKER_01 39:04

Yeah, and so since then a lot of uh athletes doing the ice bucket challenge. Doing the ice bucket challenge. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 39:13

How many degrees do you think the at like you're away from water is? No, you're away from being nominated at knowing that only athletes are doing it.

SPEAKER_01 39:22

Pretty far. Even when I had friends doing it. I don't know if I had any friends doing it.

SPEAKER_04 39:28

But it'd be a fun thing to just do randomly. Like just nominate a bunch of people randomly. People did that though, right? I know, but it's like when it's a not a part of a trend. They should you should make a you should make a new trend.

SPEAKER_01 39:42

I know ice water on your balls challenge.

SPEAKER_03 39:46

And only nominate women. I don't know how to do this, but it's for a good cause.

SPEAKER_01 39:53

All right, I'm doing a wet t-shirt for uh for cerebral palsy. Uh, and I nominate all the co-workers, all the female co-workers at my job. Anyways, pour the water on me.

SPEAKER_03 40:08

Only if you care. And then you uh forgot about this. You have to jump up and down. That's part of the the challenge.

SPEAKER_01 40:18

Have you ever been to a wet t-shirt challenge?

SPEAKER_03 40:20

No, I have not. A wet t-shirt challenge. Like contests? What's the test? It's I don't even know. It definitely ain't about you can't train for it.

SPEAKER_01 40:31

I know that. Yeah. It's I think it's just all it's all naughty.

SPEAKER_04 40:36

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 40:38

Right?

SPEAKER_04 40:38

Yeah. Uh no, I've never been to like a sanctioned event.

SPEAKER_03 40:45

Do you think with the way the world's going, that'll eventually be an Olympic event?

SPEAKER_01 40:50

If if they listen to my emails.

SPEAKER_04 40:55

Uh I could see I could see somebody introducing that into like a sport or like an event that's kind of declining. And like I think baseball could really use like if in between innings they did like a wet t-shirt thing. I think baseball is the right amount of boring. But it's it's it's so boring. I was listening to the sp the radio guys this morning in the car. Like, it's our our attention spans are getting shorter and shorter that we can't like the way the league is, people just aren't watching or coming to games as much anymore. And there's like uh, you know, these like new leagues, like the Savannah bananas, like they're popping up that are kind of changing the way baseball is played that like people just don't want to watch regular baseball anymore. That's what they say. I mean, I I don't really watch it everywhere.

SPEAKER_03 41:47

Savannah bananas looks stupid.

SPEAKER_01 41:50

Really? I feel like that'd be right up your alley.

SPEAKER_03 41:52

I like a regular baseball game.

SPEAKER_01 41:54

Oh. I'm becoming you don't like a little dancey dance and then a pitch. I mean, it is something you bring kids to. Kids love it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 42:04

Why did you think it was right up my alley? I think you let's change the subject.

SPEAKER_01 42:11

Let's change the subject. Oh, the guy that does chicken tenders and French fries.

SPEAKER_03 42:17

That is not my go-to meal. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 42:20

I I think you'd like sometimes pizza. I think you'd enjoy it. I think uh I think we'd all have a good time watching Savannah Bananas.

SPEAKER_04 42:28

I think that that's for sure. It's like a baseball game that's kind of sped up, right? Like it it cuts out a lot of the the downtime and it uh I would say sped up is not the draw of the game.

SPEAKER_01 42:41

The draw of the Savannah Bananas is how silly they are.

SPEAKER_04 42:45

Yeah, and the dancing and the flips and uh but no, you just want the regular old I want a regular old baseball game.

SPEAKER_03 42:56

Sit, do do some talking. Hot dog. Hot dog.

SPEAKER_01 43:01

I still enjoy a uh uh a baseball game, but more now that I'm older.

SPEAKER_03 43:05

That's that's what I'm thinking my reasoning is too.

SPEAKER_01 43:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 43:08

Well, I think for what you want to go to a baseball game for, then yeah, Savannah Bananas isn't the right adventure.

SPEAKER_01 43:15

Like it's almost like you baseball is stand stand up is baseball, and then Savannah Bananas is kind of like okay, a roast battle a little bit.

SPEAKER_04 43:23

It's like, hey, here's a little you want to go and sit at a bar with ten people in it so you can hear yourself talk and you don't want to go to the club.

SPEAKER_03 43:31

Definitely not. Yeah. I mean, I want to go to the club more than I want to go to the Savannah Bananas. Really? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:46

When you have kids you'll understand. What? When you have kids you'll understand.

SPEAKER_03 43:52

What do you mean?

SPEAKER_01 43:54

Why b why kids want to see the Savannah banana? Oh, I understand why I want to go.

SPEAKER_03 43:59

Yeah. But I have no reason to go. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:02

And you understand. And I understand. That's yeah. I so I get it. Yeah. That's why I want it.

SPEAKER_04 44:07

I almost bought a t shirt at the thrift store today. It said, uh, you can't hurt my feelings. I have two daughters. Just to buy it. Just gonna buy it and wear it. That's pretty great. You you did you did you get it? No, I didn't get it. I just kind of looked.

SPEAKER_01 44:22

Well, I've I had one of those. I used to have a t-shirt with you know those little novelty little They say something? Yeah, it was a pink shirt, and it said, uh, keep laughing. This is your girlfriend's shirt. And I would have usually the oldest men ever come up to me and go, ha, I gotta tell you that shirt's hilarious.

SPEAKER_03 44:43

There was a big time for those shirts. Did you wait to say the old man thing until after I laughed really hard?

SPEAKER_01 44:49

Um I mean, you guys laugh so fast I didn't have a chance to say the rest of it.

SPEAKER_04 44:54

Also picturing you in the shirt, which is pretty fun.

SPEAKER_01 44:56

I was like 14. I had a shirt.

SPEAKER_04 44:58

Fat. They sold a lot of those like kind of graphic to you stuff at like Target and stuff. Uh-huh. Yeah, it's a bit I wasn't picturing you fat. I forgot you were fat. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 45:07

I always forget you were fat. And I never forget. I told that to Olivia. Uh I go, well, he used to be fat. And she went, what?

SPEAKER_01 45:19

Uh huh.

SPEAKER_03 45:19

Like she couldn't believe it. Uh how fat?

SPEAKER_01 45:23

How fat were you? I was so fat that forget a zip code. I need a zipper code. Well, okay, so I don't know. It's but I I was 2 uh 15 at my peak. 215. Yeah. Okay. In a year I went from 215 to 140. What? Yeah. Because I dropped, I I decided to calorie count, and I kept myself under 1400 calories. Jesus Christ. Which is insane. I guess not. Because I looked, it was a sickly like drop. But now I was also jogging.

SPEAKER_04 46:02

And so Yeah, but you're not you're losing muscle as well. Like 1400 calories.

SPEAKER_01 46:07

There was no muscle for me to lose, really, at that time.

SPEAKER_04 46:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 46:10

But uh yeah, I dropped a lot. I was eating fat-free cream cheese. I was having like and that's it.

SPEAKER_04 46:17

First thing that you've the first part of your diet. It's gotta be the bottom of the triangle.

SPEAKER_03 46:23

It's gotta be the cream cheese.

SPEAKER_01 46:26

I did uh poached chicken breasts. Yeah. Oh poached. Poached.

SPEAKER_03 46:31

Oh, like hunting.

SPEAKER_01 46:34

What else? Poached chicken breast. Um, I would have lots of salads.

SPEAKER_03 46:42

My stomach is upset. Keep going. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 46:44

I didn't know how to make salads back then. I would just throw together fucking raw hard vegetables that just didn't belong in a salad. Yeah. Um, just forced my way through. And uh yeah, I mean, I yeah, I lost the time. 1400 calories a day.

SPEAKER_04 47:00

Wow. But when did you stop counting calories?

SPEAKER_01 47:04

Um, probably about a year. After a year, I was like, all right, I'm I'm good here. I know how to do it, and then I started kind of enjoying a little bit, but with careful, like instead of chips that I used to have, I'd have baked chips. Right.

SPEAKER_04 47:18

You know, do you ever feel like you should start again?

unknown 47:31

Sorry.

SPEAKER_04 47:35

You're saying I've So you have the baked no, I was just worried. Uh you have the baked chips, like the laser Do you think I should lose some weight?

SPEAKER_01 47:44

No. Honestly? No. You don't think I should lose any weight.

SPEAKER_02 47:49

I don't think you need to lose weight. You're not overweight.

SPEAKER_01 47:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 47:56

I don't think you need to lose weight.

SPEAKER_01 47:58

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 48:00

That's why I didn't. What do you weigh? I'm curious.

SPEAKER_01 48:03

Right now 160-ish?

SPEAKER_04 48:05

Yeah, that's that's uh you and you're like five ten. Five ten. Yeah, that's a normal weight. That's fine. If anything, I'm I'm technically obese. What? Uh BMI wise. Let's make it five pounds lighter than you are.

SPEAKER_01 48:25

Wait, wait, wait. So what's BMI again?

SPEAKER_04 48:27

Your body mass and big oh. Big male uh incision Yes. It's like a it's like a formula based on your your height and w you're this tall, then you should probably be around this much you know, uh uh you should be this many pounds, but it doesn't really account for uh like muscle versus fat or anything. But like technically my my BMI would say I think that I'm overweight.

SPEAKER_01 48:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 48:57

Uh so it's you know it's bullshit.

SPEAKER_03 49:00

Is that world's smallest violin still around? Yeah. So I'm just saying to all the overweight people, like I get it. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 49:08

Like I mean totally understand. It was a tough time for me.

SPEAKER_03 49:13

I can't imagine. I remember you showing me a a picture, and I I I couldn't even imagine you yeah, I used to um look in the mirror. I would No laughing. Let's do this whole thing without laughing.

SPEAKER_01 49:28

I was I'd be alone at home, I'd take off my shirt. I would look in the mirror, and then I'd would try to pull off my stomach, like you know, like trying to yank it off.

SPEAKER_04 49:43

Pull it off your body.

SPEAKER_01 49:44

Pull it up, pull it off my body. And um I remember one time I came home and my dad said he said, You've gotten so fucking fat. Oh my god. And you don't do anything. Oh my god. And uh yeah, and I said, Shut up, dad.

SPEAKER_04 50:10

And then uh Is that when you started to lose the weight?

SPEAKER_01 50:13

No, I lost it around when I was 19 or yeah, 20, 21. I just uh I had come I was in Seattle and I just started beginning like this hab like I was like, oh when I get back, I just I've tried little mini attempts before, but this one I was like, oh let me really what happened in Seattle that made you go when I get back. So I was staying at um so I was getting my driver's license out there. Why are you smiling?

SPEAKER_03 50:43

Uh excit it's always excitement. Because this one's excitement because I've set you up if you wanted to go silly.

SPEAKER_01 50:53

I'm gonna tell you what happened.

SPEAKER_03 50:54

I'm trying to hear it.

SPEAKER_01 50:56

So I was in Seattle, and then uh I was there to get my driver's license because I didn't have the papers to get it in New York, so we went over there to get it, and then there's a guy that helps you do that. You stay in his house, okay? Um, there was another guy that lived in the house. And I it would just be me and him, and we'd be watching TV. One night he's like You know, I like a guy with a little bit of like you're joking. Like a little extra um cushion.

SPEAKER_04 51:33

Did you know he was gay?

SPEAKER_01 51:34

Huh?

SPEAKER_04 51:34

Did you know he was gay?

SPEAKER_01 51:35

No. And then um I went to sleep and I woke up with him filling me up.

SPEAKER_03 51:42

No, you're joking. Yeah, I'm joking.

SPEAKER_01 51:45

So I so really I think the biggest thing was get having a smartphone. I had a smartphone so I could download the calorie counting app, and then it felt like a game.

SPEAKER_04 51:54

Vastly different story.

SPEAKER_01 51:57

And then I felt every time I went over the calorie thing I set, I felt like I failed. You gamified it. I gamified it, and then I was fucking nailing. Actually, it was supposed to be like under I was supposed to go under 1900 or 2000. Yeah, and I was like I was doing 1400s.

SPEAKER_04 52:15

Right, because you thought you'd get extra points or something.

SPEAKER_01 52:17

I'd be like, look how much even better like if I just hit that. Yeah. And uh, and yeah, and then it just it came right off pretty much. I'd say the majority of the weight came off in the first two months.

SPEAKER_04 52:28

That makes sense. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 52:30

Yeah. Um and then so yeah, that's I did that.

SPEAKER_04 52:34

I was uh at one point when I was younger, I was like pudgy. Like I was uh a little chunky, but I don't know, I was never like plump. Yeah, I was a very plump, but like boyish, like you know, like bigger cheeks and stuff like that, and then just yeah, like a tits? I never had dits, but uh I was really just soft all over. And uh yeah, didn't that's hard to picture with you. Didn't like it. Um now every part of you is uh hard. Always all the time.

SPEAKER_01 53:14

Let's see what's going on.

SPEAKER_04 53:17

I like a guy who's uh uh yeah, that's wild though.

SPEAKER_01 53:23

Yeah, and then after I lost it, it was like a whole identity crisis.

SPEAKER_03 53:27

I yeah, because I have a question. Like, have you run into people that only knew you before and now see you now and they're like wow, what a difference.

SPEAKER_01 53:38

Yeah, um not many, but some, right? Like I I actually have uh I the only people that know were like okay, childhood friends that I still hang with. They saw that you know, got over it fast. But high school people only knew me as a fat ass. And then I lost it, and then I have I've only seen like you know, a couple of classmates that came to a show a couple years ago, and uh, you know, I I think I think it did something for them, you know. W I made out with one of them after. Oh and before that I didn't think there was she had any interest in me, you know. But I don't know, that could I don't know. I don't I don't know how what their thought I have very little confidence in high school anyways, yeah, which was part the weight was a big part of it. And then I was it's weird because in high school I was like uh I was not afraid to say whatever I wanted. I mean, it seems like I'm that way now.

SPEAKER_03 54:39

But back then I just I believe that it was worse back then.

SPEAKER_01 54:42

It was way worse. All the words that you can't say, all of them.

SPEAKER_04 54:48

Yeah, no, I can I can imagine.

SPEAKER_01 54:50

All of them. And I'd have a blast, and I was like, well, that's hilarious, or uh, that's fun, and that was my personality, was this thing. But then I st I I lost it, I lost the weight, and then I was like, Well, I must be, I wonder if I'm good looking now. That was the the question I asked.

SPEAKER_03 55:08

And because I'm attractive, now I can't say those words. Attracts. Well, then I it became this weird place of like Did the app tell you what word you lost when you hit a certain goal?

SPEAKER_01 55:25

I think here's what happened, okay? When I was fat, okay, I just there were just people that weren't into me from looks right off the bat, and then I would have my personality, and then that would draw the people in. Gotcha. Whereas when I lost the weight, I think almost the opposite. It was like, all right, people would be on board when they saw me. Then they heard what I had to.

SPEAKER_04 55:45

Almost like you're you're attracting a different type of person off the bat.

SPEAKER_01 55:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 55:52

Yeah. Oh because before it's like, well, if you're into this now, it's gotta be my personality. Yes. Exactly.

SPEAKER_03 56:00

Right. Not me, I've always had this body and I'll never lose it.

SPEAKER_01 56:05

Uh but yeah, it was uh the the the the year after losing weight was like uh there is really this gap after a fatty loses their weight where it's just it's weird. They're they're as insecure as can be during that time. You know? Is it because I said fatty?

SPEAKER_04 56:26

Yeah, it just kind of got me. There was a girl I went to high school with who like would yo-yo from like she was always big in high school, like really big. And then and then and then like some time went by and I checked like her fate, you know, Facebook, she would pop up, and she got like super skinny. Yeah. And there is a weird, there's like two lanes where it's like, all right, you either got really dis or there's like some kind of emotional switch with it, because she would lose all the way, get really skinny, and then blow right back up again. And then, but I'm saying she would go up and down.

SPEAKER_01 57:07

I'm like, that's and you'd have to friend her and unfriend her and friend her.

SPEAKER_04 57:10

I would be like, all right, see you in six months. And no, I mean, I I wish we were like we were friends in high school, but it had been so long. I wish we were better friends because I'd I'm so curious as to how that happens because somebody to get from being big to skinny, it's like you have to be so on top of it. Yeah, and it seems like somebody who's that on top of it wouldn't allow themselves to get beyond a certain like I've had you had weeks where you're just like I've been friggin' off of it, but then you get back on their train. So to to let yourself go after going through because it's so hard to lose that much weight.

SPEAKER_01 57:49

Well, you've never you don't have it in your personality to become that big of a person. Otherwise, you would have done it at some point in your life. They did, and that just kind of that's a thing they have to repress and like hold down. You think it's like always loses at some point.

SPEAKER_04 58:06

Your brain like like me, it won't allow me to get past where I've been at my biggest. Where it's like where it's like, all right, this is the biggest you've ever been. Whereas somebody who loses all that weight, even if they start to gain weight, they're like, Well, I'm still I'm not there until they eventually slide back there.

SPEAKER_01 58:25

Yep, yep, yep. That I could see. So interesting. For sure, yeah. Yeah. Because I had I had like I've been I was good for probably since I was 21. I was probably good for like 10 years or so. And then like two or three years ago, I kind of had a little go going back up, you know, in a relationship. You photos of me were it was starting to come back.

SPEAKER_04 58:46

Also, just as you get older, it's harder to like.

SPEAKER_01 58:51

But in a relationship, it's probably when that was my first relationship, and like there's nothing to do in a relationship other than eat.

SPEAKER_04 59:01

That's the sign of a good one. That's it. I know what you mean. Meals are a big part of it.

SPEAKER_01 59:07

Yeah. You sit down, eat. Oh, how's your day? Yeah. Hang.

SPEAKER_03 59:15

Oh, yeah, the pasta's good. That's why I'm trying to uh be more active in my relationship. It does help that she got a five-story walk-up. But uh uh I find it I bond more with a partner when we do stuff together, not just sitting across the table eating. Yeah. Uh because that scares the hell out of me, is just all we're doing is eating. Not even the calorie aspect, just the the boring, like what it what if I have not what if I'm having one of those days where I have nothing to say because I just have nothing, you know everything. I talk to you every day. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 59:55

Uh the wells run dry. Right. And you're just scraping gravel.

SPEAKER_03 59:59

Yeah. Right. And you're like just licking the drops on the rocks.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:04

Yeah. It's brutal. I've had that was every conversation in the last three months of my relationship.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:12

Whereas like you just have nothing to Yeah, it was just, I don't, you know, that's it. And uh, well, I ended. Well, uh with the end of that relationship comes the end of our episode. Thanks for watching, guys. This is the end of the show.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:36

I really I tripped my whole way through that.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:40

Yes, but it's okay. Me and Taylor will be in Boston in the first week of August uh at White Bull Tavern Hideout Comedy. I'm headlining one night, Taylor is headlining the other.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:53

Yes. Also, I'll have a special coming out later this year, so look out for that. Follow me on uh YouTube and Instagram.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:01

Uh I'll be in Austin, Texas with Peter uh in August, and then September I'll be at Hilarities in Cleveland, Ohio. And then I will be uh recording my special February 27th at Greenpoint Comedy Club in Greenpoint, Brooklyn, New York. Please come out to that and also donate to Benny.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:26

Yes. Uh how's our how's our goal right now? How are we doing?

SPEAKER_03 1:01:30

Uh we're not near the goal, but uh we're almost halfway to the goal. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:36

Hey.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:37

So if you could donate, that'd be great. Uh please. Please. He's my best friend. Wow. I said I was here comes a chargeback. That went exactly more than I was hoping for.