Dying in LA LA Land

Dying in LA LA Land: "War Dog of Hollywood Blvd.".

Ron Campise Season 2 Episode 1

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Ron Campise tells the story of a Large Dog found on Hollywood Blvd. carrying a severed human Hand and an Actor having coffee with the severed head of his Agent.

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Ron

Welcome to my podcast, Dying in La La Land, and this is Ron Campisi, and this story is War Dogs of Hollywood Boulevard. Tourists were walking, laughing, and yakking on Hollywood Boulevard, taking in the sunshine at a low eighty degrees, looking at the sights and strange costume creatures, superheroes who had seen better days, sesame creatures in worn, unkept costumes and power rangers, fake fighting bots from another world. No one expected, even the jaded, wally eyed regulars of Hollywood Boulevard, what next appeared walking down the sidewalk. The War dog of Hollywood Boulevard moved at a deliberate pace, sort of marching to his own tune. A spiked collar around his neck and a scar ran down his face. He growled lowly at anyone who'd get in his way. Tourists scrambled, screamed, and fell over one another at the sight of War Dog strolling down Hollywood Boulevard, for in his drooling mouth Wardog carried a cleanly severed human hand. The other tourist, regaining some composure, began to take in stream images while also falling over themselves. Wardog was confronted by Hollywood Division patrol officers at the corner of Hollywood and Highland Avenue, outside Mousso Frank's restaurant. Officers determined Wardog was a threat to public safety, and it made some aggressive moves and was shot dead on the spot. Nearly at the same time, an unkempt, handsome, formerly famous middle aged actor entered Denny's restaurant at the corner of Gower and Sunset, carrying a large backpack on his shoulder. He sat at the counter near a few of the locals and asked the waitress to leave the seat next to him for his agent. He sat down and asked for two separate cups of coffee and slices of apple pie, one for the empty seat beside him. No one noticed his blood spattered hands and shirt. After all, this was Hollyweird. The washed up actor then proceeded to unzip his large backpack and began speaking as if to a person that had just arrived, then pulled a wide eyed severed human head out of the packback and slammed it on the counter in front of the cup of coffee and pie, and began a conversation with his former now be dead theatrical agent, Mikey Rabinowitz. Even for the veteran regulars at Denny's and Gower Gulp, this was more than slightly disturbing. The screams began to slowly build, then into a full onset, primal roar as customers abandoned their food and cozy booths and ran for the exits. Then reports came in of a third related crime scene. In a converted commercial building resembling an apartment complex on Yucca Street near the Hollywood Freeway. Arriving officers swept a complex that was now occupied by a small firm and theatrical agents, most of whoda already fled. The reason being two severed feet still in socks and shoes along with a severed hand had been placed in front of the entry doors of the other businesses. The other hand was missing and later determined to be taken by the hungry war dog down Hollywood Boulevard. While clearing the complex's rooms, the patrol officers entered the office of the Rubinowitz agency and found his body sitting upright at his desk. His head, hands, and feet had been cleanly severed with a razor sharp machete. The missing head was the same one now located on the counter at the Gowers Denny's location. And the other hand was in front of Musso Frank's restaurant on Hollywood Boulevard. The entire scene of the murder was what the LAPD Detective Bureau referred to as a cluster frick. A murder scene on Yucca Street, a suspect with a severed head apprehended on Gower Street, and an officer involved dog shooting on Hollywood Boulevard. Not a typical m scene in Hollywood Division. The scene was processed for evidence and the body, torso, and body parts cleaned up within ten hours by a team of eight detectives, six crime scene investigators, three coroners, and one animal control officer to pick up the war dog's remains. The suspect, a once again semi-famous, now notorious former actor, during his trial was determined to be insane. A slightly extreme condition even for a method actor. Mr. Robinowitz's office was cleaned up, repainted, refurbished, and occupied by another agent within a week. This was Hollywood, by the way, and the show must always go on. Thank you for listening to my Dying in Lalaland podcast. Hit the follow button. We would love your feedback. And tell your friends.