Living You
A real estate podcast for people living authentically
Living You
Living Us
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
We’d love to hear from you! Leave a comment and join the conversation.
In this episode, we’re getting a little more personal. We’re sharing pieces of who we are, what matters to us, and the experiences that have shaped our journey—both in life and in what we do every day.
It’s real, it’s honest, and it’s a chance for you to get to know the people behind the scenes on a deeper level.
The living you podcast is a conversation about life, real estate, and the journey of living you.
For more updates, please follow us on:
Facebook: Living You Media
Instagram: livingyoumedia
YouTube: Living You Podcast
So here we are. We're back. And I am going to do a real intro because we do a lot of formal topics and you know plan out episodes. But I just have a couple of things I want to just address in general with my friend Rich. So this is off the cuff.
SPEAKER_01I don't know what's coming.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, he doesn't know what's but I was like, I thought this is very funny to say. I was like, oh, why don't we just he's like, why don't you hit record? Okay, if that's what you want. So anyway, this one's this one we'll call off the cuff, and it's just us kind of jamming and uh being buddies and appreciating each other because we were just um talking about uh getting properties ready in the spring and you know, and and you know, Rich was talking a lot more about the outside the curb appeal, you know, because he's a land guy, he walks around and it instantly made me think um he he did a video for a beautiful listing he just put up on what is that you have no one, handsome Brook Road. And he said he sent me the video and I watched it with my husband who also helps us with some of our marketing. So, you know, we watched his video because he spends a lot of time, he does an amazing job of showing everything and talking about it. Um, but what Rich really loves to do is walk land. So he's walking land and he's talking about the different features, and he says, and I know to Rich it's it's not, it's it doesn't sound like something, but he says, you know, we back here in you know in this meadow and with the deciduous trees, and uh and then he keep keeps talking. So so to so my husband immediately starts laughing. He was like, like most people, and we most people are maybe wouldn't even pick up on that, but it's on top of the last pod, he just said, the sedimentary rock. And okay, all right, so there's another, right? And then and then it reminded me of when we were doing that drive that day, and you you just like randomly said, you know, if trees had a choice, they would be black.
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, oh yeah, so well that's uh that's my intelligent design uh counterbalance. Intelligent design, we can't yeah, intelligent design would create like black vegetation because it would absorb all the wavelengths of light. Why would you reject wavelengths of light that could benefit your energy? Like, this is not smart.
SPEAKER_00This is why I love you. Because like this is a conversation most people won't have, but in a listing video we're talking about sedimentary rock and deciduous trees, and if I were vegetation, I would choose to be black.
SPEAKER_01See, you what you don't understand is that like I triggered him. Maybe no. See, for me, I I'm not trying to say I have some crazy lexicon, but like a deciduous tree, I think that's I think that's a known thing. Maybe I'm wrong. Um but what I don't actually know, the reason I use it, Jess, is because I I have a gap in my knowledge. I'm in the woods a lot, but I don't know all of the tree species, like by bark or or leaf type, even though I was a biologist in my my earlier life. I never really I'm not a naturalist. I'm more of a like a cellular biologist. But anyway, so I can't look in the woods and be like, we have birches. I know I mean birches are obvious, but like ash, maple, cherry. I don't know all those. So I can't go in the woods and be like, this is a nice stand of cherry over here because I just frankly don't know. So I say deciduous because it's it's all-encompassing. It means the leaves fall off, right? And then the other ones that they don't, those are the the pines or the coniferous trees.
SPEAKER_00The carnivorous trees. That's what I'm saying. So I I love that, and you're smart, and maybe there's maybe it's just me that's that's the dopey one. I just hear those words and I'm like, wow, I wonder how that's landing. Like in a listing video, how is that landing? Like, are people like, yeah, those are deciduous trees, rock on?
SPEAKER_01Like, I'm gonna make me sound like arrogant or pompous or something.
SPEAKER_00No, I don't think it sounds arrogant or pompous at all. I actually appreciate how smart you are. I feel like I learned from you a lot too. Um, but I just thought that was um that was just funny because it's definitely an ongoing trend of geology references that might be a little um, they might be kind of stretching, stretching out of their little real estate videos a little bit. Like, you know, is that wow, they're gonna buy this house because of those deciduous trees.
SPEAKER_01This is why we call the podcast the Living You podcast, Jess, because it's more, it's far more, we hope it's far more than real estate. It's certainly who we are, it's who people are. We at some point would like to talk to other people on this pod and talk about what their life is like and what drives them. And if if if science slips into my everyday discourse because that's where my mind is, that's part of who I am. Guess what? And that's who I'm being, that's my authentic self. Right. I'm not gonna censor myself and my deciduous uh you know, that's right.
SPEAKER_00But when I send you a funny meme of the thesaurus and it's a T-Rex chasing people, you have to laugh. You're like, I he was like, I sent him this stupid meme. He's like, I don't know why you sent this to me. Because most of your words most people don't use, but that that's okay. I think you should continue being you. And I was pointing out that we appreciated that, and it gave us a little chuckle, and but it made me very proud to be your friend because my friend is smart, and you should be friends with smart people, not stupid people. So now you can pick on me because I'm sure there's things.
SPEAKER_01I didn't prep anything.
SPEAKER_00Well, I know what you're gonna say, it's gonna be our my woo-woo conversations.
SPEAKER_01Well, you want to tell your friends about it. I consider you a close friend, and we we talk a lot. We talk a lot about business, and we also talk not like every day, but when we are driving to like an event or a s or a seminar or something, we we tend to have blocks of time where you get into like more life conversations. Um but you you and I'm not gonna get into like politics and stuff, but you definitely trend more in the conspiratorial, uh like ethereal you you you believe in like forces and processes that are unbeknownst to mankind at our current understanding of things, and and you think that they, you know, we're all tied together by energies and like there's a lot, and I'm not saying I don't believe in those things, but I don't spend any of my day on a regular basis thinking about them. Right? If you want to have that conversation, I'm I'm all ears and I love a big, a big open-ended conversation, but I have zero bandwidth for that in my everyday life. I don't I don't go outside on my on my deck, have a cup of coffee, and like pontificate on, you know, the string theories and how many universes there are happening right now. I I I could in a certain environment, but that's not what's happening most of the times. I'm just living life and trying to like think about who I need to call next.
SPEAKER_00Correct.
SPEAKER_01And which is maybe an indictment on on life, and that that we are I am bogged down by the stress. This is a pivot, but it's a stress to run a business and to be productive and to be a professional. And there's almost like, um, are you even allowed to have downtime? You know, are you allowed to do we we had a class yesterday we both liked in different ways, and um part of it was like finding ways to utilize other people to help you with processes that allow you to gain some per personal time back and and and you know, and that makes you more energized to then do the parts that you love, which makes a ton of sense, but it's very hard as a as a small business owner. There's just a lot of pressure in a lot of ways. Um, I took that way darker than we started this, but anyway, it's not dark, just kind of just kind of the laborious, you know, uh like like mindset that I think most Americans have, whether you're a small business owner or you're you're a W-2. It's a hard go. I said this a couple weeks ago, it's a hard go right now being alive as a even even us middle-aged, like semi-prosperous white Americans, like we've we're we're about the most like like default easiest set point you could possibly start life, like maybe in ever in history, and we're still just like kind of semi-depressed, and like this is hard. It's not great.
SPEAKER_00I mean, yeah, I mean, I think a lot of people, no matter where they are, or you know, who they are, or where, you know, uh all of us face, and I'm gonna get woo-woo. This is what Rich calls woo-woo, but um, all of us face obstacles, adversity, challenges, obviously. But in my own exploration of uh life, of the human condition, of spirit, you know, of our connectedness, um, I feel like I've discovered that kind of that's the point um to be challenged. And you're gonna be given only what you can handle. And I feel like our purpose is literally to learn how to navigate these challenges. And some people have many, many, many more challenges than we have. Um, and they are loved and they are blessed, and they are fighting a good fight, and they're learning through it, and there's pain through things like that, and I my heart is with them. Um, I I think that's something that is important for me to communicate is that I literally love people unconditionally. It's a very odd. There's people that piss me off. I'm not saying that I'm perfect in that way. I mean, people really make me angry, and people have hurt me, and I've let people hurt me, but there's people that are facing such great challenges, and the only the only thing I can take away from that is like, but if they what if they learn, right? What if they get through it, they survive it, whatever, they get past it, they get away from the the abuser or whatever the situation is, or they get out of financial hardship. And what did they learn? And what can they do to never put themselves back in that situation, you know, and how can they take control of their lives? And I want people to know that they have infinite power to do that. And um I think that's the tough concept is it this feels reality, it feels so dense. It feels so real, and it feels like things are just happening to us. But the concept that we have to really master, which is something I I actively work on every day, reading things and exposing myself is I love your face right now, too.
SPEAKER_01So I'm listening, that's my pencil face, right?
SPEAKER_00Is is learning like, but how can I change, you know, just my circumstances, right? So we look at it like, what are my goals? But I think if you level up from there and you say, How do I have to change my thinking? How do I have to change my belief system? Because if you believe that you're not good enough, then you're constantly going to bring into existence situations that remind you that you're not good enough. It's this whole thing about you really are creating your own reality. And I know Rich is a science guy, so I I encourage you to look into those things, like this, the quantum physics, and even just how the mind and the brain work, that we're interpreting a grid, we're interpreting a reality all very uniquely. And you have to understand that, like when people do something to you, right, or something happens to you, you have a choice in how that's going to affect you. You have a choice in what that does next, and a choice in your reaction, and a choice in your reality. And if you don't like it, get away from it. Don't, you know, don't stay there. Um, I think people stay in negativity because we've kind of almost been conditioned by negativity to be that's where we thrive. Work hard. Right? Like if it's not painful, then you're not doing anything. No. You have to see Jess's life. I am all about how can I be super comfortable today and let things happen? The sun is shining, the wind is blowing, and that's as much effort as I need to put in right now. And that doesn't mean I don't work. It doesn't mean I don't put effort towards things that I enjoy, but I don't have to work hard. I don't have to put myself out. I just have to believe that the effort I put in is going to give me the result that I want. And everyone deserves that. Everyone deserves that belief, and everyone deserves exactly what it is they think they deserve. So make sure you tell yourself you deserve something positive.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_00So that's all the woo, the woo-woo. So so when Rich goes into his geology, I go into my quantum physics. So actually, we have our safe spaces.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, your safe spaces are something that mine isn't. That's okay.
SPEAKER_00No, it's it's fine, but I I will get you there. One day, mark my words. We will be on this podcast, and Rich will be like, dude, I watched this guy, and he was talking about the soul. One day we'll get where where this piques your interest enough to geek out on it.
SPEAKER_01You know, you know what's a good here's a here's one. Um this is a sort of science-y, but now here's the problem is I'm I come from a science-y family. My father was a doctor, my mom was a nurse, my dad was a cardiologist, uh, and uh, but he's also from Brazil, so he has this cute like accent. And so most of my perception of my father is that like I never saw him in a professional capacity. He went to work, he was a doctor. I don't know what he did, he just came home and whatever. Um, but but he he always he has like this very thick Brazilian accent, a non-a non-American accent, but he's a good storyteller, he's very engaging. Um, but I also he's also, you know, he's he's older now, and he's he's he's fun. He's he's a cute, he's this cute, short, pot bellied Brazilian man. He's a he's he's great. But uh but I never saw him as like I don't want to say not smart because he's obviously intelligent, but I just never saw it. You know, it wasn't in there was no reason to be doctoring around the house, right? So but but he he would travel, do speeches, obviously very, very high-level cardiologist. Anyway, he now lives in this like uh what do you call it? It's like a assisted living home. They don't really, my parents don't need it, but they're they're gonna age in place in this this place. So they live with a bunch of like their age and older people. Um if they like it, they get all their meals made, they get to go hang out and do all these like group yoga, whatever. I don't know. They like it. Um but the other day my mom sent me a YouTube link. My dad presented a speech to like the people in the facility. I guess they they have speakers come in every every month or so to talk about something just to engage their minds. And so this month my dad was the presenter, and he starts this thing about this new molecule that's been discovered in science. It's called exerkines, and it's it's not relative, it's not brand new, but it's like a relatively new discovery of an actual new molecule, which doesn't happen every day. And at my first thought was, now Jess, I'm not I did study science and I like science, but I'm not plugged into it anymore. I don't read journals, I don't keep up with it. My first thought was, oh my god, did my dad like get scammed or found some like weird Facebook link? And then he like started to believe in like some woo-woo like fake molecule.
SPEAKER_00And now he's like talk to Jess.
SPEAKER_01Like exercise, like what the concept is like the exercise, these are molecules that your body produces once you when you do exercise and they help heal and whatever. And like, I'm like, dude, dad, what are you what are you doing? Like, you fell for some weird modern scam thing. You're this and then I'm like, no, let me check. Turns out, of course, my dad's freaking hundred percent right. Like, there's a whole body of recent research, it's brand new. He's on the cusp of like cutting edge research. He's like, This was published in January 2026. Like, he's no joke. I was just like, I was sitting there, I'm like, dude, my dad is a baller. He's a baller, yeah, probably been a baller, and I never like fully gave him a big one. Yeah, yeah, 100%. I'm like, That's awesome. I yeah, it's like uh it's just a perception thing, you know. I'm like, oh, this old old man in this nursing home just kind of giving us weird speech. But he's like, No, guys, all the people in my home, like you, this is why, literally, why you should keep exercising, even if it's four minutes of stretching, you're releasing this compound that is actually gonna help you live longer and have more mental clarity, blah, blah, blah. Uh anyway, it's just cool. It's just I'm proud of my dad, right? And uh, just a neat thing. But a context, I just never saw this human being for most of my entire life. It was just it was cool.
SPEAKER_00But I love that um that thought, and thank you for sharing that, because you don't really talk about your family a lot, so it's we get a little little nugget once in a while. Um, but that's such an interesting concept because how much do we really know about people? Um, and how much, you know, we have again our what they present to us in our very limited, you know, interaction or lens or whatever, like people are icebergs. I always say we're like icebergs. You only really see what's above the water, but what's underneath, right? And what we really think about and what we really know, what we really value, and who we really are, most of it is so unseen. Most of most people will never truly be seen. Um, and there's a lot of, you know, and even like what you did, you know, you it was jarring to you almost to see your dad in another context. Well, most people are like that. And our parents, it's funny that it you reverse it the other way, but I've seen parents that are shocked when their kids grow up and their kids are really good at something like, oh, you can't do that because they still see the little kid. They still think you don't know anything and you're cute and they have to wipe your butt. But actually, your kids grow up and they're pretty talented, amazing people. And, you know, sometimes there's friction in, you know, children parent relationships because the parent still sees their child as a child, but really they're this incredible, successful person. And we do that to people that we love. We keep them where we met them or where we like them or where we're comfortable with them. And it goes back to what I'm saying. Like, we don't, we almost put the the box around other people, even people that we love. So it's like breaking that down and letting people be who they are and giving them an opportunity to change. I think it's also why marriages break down. And I say this to my husband all the time like, I just need you to know that I'm changing, I'm evolving, I'm changing, I'm on this journey, and I need you to know that I'm going through this. I literally check in with him and he's like, oh, good, I am too. And sometimes we're actually on the same journey of conspiracy theories. I'm getting it.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, but but let's that's an incredibly healthy thing to feel.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, you have to let people change. You have to let them be different than who you think that they are. Um, I love that so much because also we we want, we want we don't do well with change. People don't do well with change as well, and we're constantly changing, but we want things to stay the way we have them and we fix our lives, and you make your bed and you pick out your colors, and you know, you wear a certain type of clothes. Like we stay in our boxes and we stay in our routines, and you know, we're very, we're very regimented that way, even even if we're messy, that's also a pattern. But it's okay to break your pattern. Break your pattern. Let's let's break our patterns, let's make a homework assignment. Leave a comment wherever you can find us. What are your patterns that you're looking to break? Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Perception and um, yeah, our expectations and perception of others is is interesting. Yeah, and we once they're set, they're hard to change, right? They're hard to re-it's hard to re- put someone in a different category or box. Like you going back to like our life as agents, like if you have one one negative interaction with another agent, that doesn't make them a bad person. It doesn't even make them a bad agent. It just means they had a weird moment or whatever in the world.
SPEAKER_00That doesn't define them as a person.
SPEAKER_01Exactly. Yeah, and I think there's a lot of jumping to conclusions in our history.
SPEAKER_00Absolutely. I love that you said that too, because I that's one of the things that I'm good at when I said I I love people because there's always something to love. I literally find something because I always try to get under the surface, like especially doing business. I don't want to just deal with another agent. Um, in our class yesterday, she said, I don't want to be everyone's best friend. I just want to get the and I'm like, mm, pump the brakes. I want to be everyone's best friend. That was up to you. I like that. I know you're like, I hate everybody. I'm kidding. I just want to get to adjust the. I know you don't hate. I know, I'm teasing. But yes, my whole thing is like, what am I gonna discover about this person? Like, people are interesting to me, and I want to know. Like, I've had people very closed-lipped and not really give me a lot in a showing, and they're very, you know, and and I still just keep talking to them and I just keep loving on them, and I just keep engaging them like like a little kid that like doesn't get that they don't want to talk to me. I don't get that they don't want to talk to me. I won't accept that because I'm also not going to change who I am for someone else. And I know that there's mirror matching. I know that you want you don't want to make people uncomfortable and be like this nut job in front of everyone. You also, yes, want to acclimate into your relationships and conversations, but I push it, I push it. I keep, I push that line because I don't I want to be who I am and I want to be very comfortable, and I actually want to be friendly with you. I want to have a friendly positive interaction. And you may be hell bent on, and not you, Rich, but the person I'm dealing with may be hell bent on having a negative interaction with me right now. It's not Happening. I'm gonna, I'm gonna just continuously put an endless flow of effort and love into chipping away at your attitude or your negativity or whatever issue you have today and showing you that I'm different and I'm gonna expect a different result. Nine times out of ten, people do relax around me and they go, Oh, okay, I can I can curse now. It's like the biggest one. I can curse now, or like, oh, I feel comfortable now. Whatever it is, like people do come around eventually because I think they're clenched. Like I was talking about something else this morning with just being clenched and holding on, and I gotta do this, and I'm worried I gotta get this today, and I have to get this today, the stress. Like you were talking about. Stop, breathe, right? What was my mantra from yesterday? Breathe, don't resist and let things unfold as they will unfold. Yeah. Calm down, chill out. Everything's gonna be fine. You're okay, I'm okay. How do we have fun right now? How do we enjoy each other's presence right now? And I want to enjoy everyone that I come into contact with. I don't want to have any negative interactions ever again. I would make everyone my friend, and we're all happy. That's it might be a weird thing, but that's literally my goal.
SPEAKER_01I don't I don't want to know if we want to go on too long, but just have you ever done like do you consider yourself an extrovert on a on a or an introvert, like on that scale? I mean, do you have you done like the Myers Briggs type deals and stuff like that?
SPEAKER_00No, I haven't, but I I do consider myself to be an introvert, but I do get my energy around people. I get my energy from, but it's it's how I create safety. So if we're like talking about ourselves, um, so I was bullied, and anyone that's being bullied or was bullied, like it's awful. I'm with you, I feel you, and it's the worst existence ever to just try in your most formative years to get ahead or just go to friggin' school, or just like you just don't want this today, and just be just destroyed emotionally every day, and in some cases physically every day. It's I get it. So I was bullied. So I built this defense mechanism, which if I go to these people and I am friendly and I can provide some kind of value to them, or I can make them like me, they can't bully me anymore. So it's it was a survival mechanism that I just sort of kept and liked. It's like I go out of my way to make everyone want to be friendly towards me so that I know that I'm safe. It's literally a very selfish mechanism and I identify my psychology. Yeah, but I want you to be my friend and I want you to like me. So there's no chance that you can hurt me. The issue with that is when relationships do break down because they do or there's challenges, I am very, very, very hurt because I have put even more effort than the other person realizes into building a relationship where I can't be hurt in this relationship. I feel safe now coming out and being fully myself so that when it breaks down, or if it breaks down, it's really, really bad for me and really hard for me because that little girl that was bullied, there she is again. And but I I literally think I've created this, you know, mostly out of safety. And I say that I want to create a tribe of people around me that feel the same way, that just want to be accepted, loved, nurtured, positive relationships, supported. That's why coaching was perfect for me. And I am inside of this hug of people around me that I'm safe in. I'm just creating safety. And I think it's a very, it's a very relatable concept for a lot of people.
SPEAKER_01I think uh in our other recording, I think I was saying something about how like part of my I I'm a little bit more overtly strategic, I think, in most things in life than maybe you are, but like I said something along the lines of I like to get ahead of the curve or or or you know, anticipate that thing that could be a problem. And you're almost saying I talk a lot to people or I I connect with them so that I can almost like same thing, prevent them being mean to me, or or like because if we're friends, then they're not gonna be mean or something along those lines.
SPEAKER_00Correct. But I'm also hardwired for caution. So I did the um strength finders. Oh my gosh, do strength finders, oh my gosh, we'll we should do it again. And it tells you like your profile, like what type of personality you have. And mine was so stupid spot on. It was better than the disc, it was better than Keller Williams KPA strength finders. Um, I did it with my whole leadership team in the Jackson Heights office, and I discovered that I'm hardwired for caution. I will all I it's not that I'm negative. I'm going to always look for what can go wrong. So I have that inherently, and I'm trying to avoid pain, and I'm trying to avoid myself being bullied today. So it's like layers and layers deep in my whole psyche of like, I need to find if there's any pitfalls. So I go out of my way to build bridges. I go out of my way to build an environment where I'm like in a padded room. Literally, that might be a visual. But I try to pad my life where there's no way there's going to be, you know, there's gonna be any any harm that comes to my my little heart.
SPEAKER_01You know, you know what? I like I I think I get along. I'm I have Eve, I have, I was, I'm an introvert, clearly. Like I I gain my energy being alone or or quiet. And I can, and it took me a lot of my life to develop into the social capabilities that I have now, which I can hack it, I can make it. I I do connect with people pretty well, but it is still, I know, not far under the surface. I'm just running the program that lets me be social, right? So like I'm aware of how computer my brain is. We all are, by the way, but like having studied neuroscience, I get that a little bit more, but but still, uh where was I going with that? I think what I was when I oh, the kind I I get along with most personality types in general. The people that I truly don't understand, Jess, are people that are like really impulsive, they make big decisions like without taking a beat. I remember it wasn't long ago, I was I was it was a different context. I want to get into that context, but someone I knew was like they they took their car in for like a service, it was like oil change or something pretty minimal, and they came out with like a new car. And I was like I was like, what now? Like, how did that how did that happen? Because there's not a single chance in the world that I'm gonna go in for an oil change and walk away with a new car. Not a single effing chance. Like, what happened? How did that go?
SPEAKER_00Like, I love that. I have to say that I that's that's something that could happen to me.
SPEAKER_01No, no way. No way.
SPEAKER_00There's no way. I love that. I mean, so a lot of times, I get it, you gotta think things through. You have to weigh options, you gotta weigh it out. Like, does this make sense? And then maybe make a spreadsheet and a graph and like really figure out if this does make the most I did have some car work done last year that was like about 15% of the cost of a new car, and I was like, you know what?
SPEAKER_01I could just like but that but I wasn't close to making that decision. But I was like, dang, that's an expensive service. Um yeah, but it was like long long term anyway. But it's just like that's that's 10%, 50% towards a new car.
SPEAKER_00That's so far out of your comfort zone. Yeah. I mean, I wouldn't say I'm, you know, in you know, I don't I don't think I'm impulsive, but I think my husband would say I am. I mean, just moving up here, right? Uprooting my whole life from Queens and moving to upstate New York, but I go and don't be shocked. I go on my gut. I go on how my heart feels. And my heart is what steers me because I feel like that's if I'm not happy, then why would I stay in a situation where I'm not happy? If my heart hurts or my heart's like, mm-hmm for me, I'm gonna listen to it. I actually am, because at the end of the day, I don't want the extra stress. I don't want the pain, right? I'm looking for comfort, I'm looking for happiness, I'm looking for friendship, I'm looking for joy, I'm looking to, you know, want to celebrate life as much as possible and not have adversity. So it's okay to do that. For me, I think it's okay to seek out happiness on a daily basis. And it's like, oh, that didn't bring me happiness, I won't do that again, you know, or that life is going in a direction I don't want it to go in. You know, it started to feel really stressful in the city, and the city's dirty, and there was so many people I couldn't connect to, and so much bad energy that I was as an empath absorbing. I was just surrounded by by things I couldn't really weather. And some people can turn that off and like just go through, you know, the busyness of the city and not have an issue. But I need to be in green grass, I need to be grounding, I need to be near my creek, my overflowing creek, near water, have the energy flowing and moving around me. And that is the introvert part of me that then heals in that environment. But I get my energy from going and connecting to people. So once I feel full, I'm happy on my farm, then I can go find people. Hey, you want to be my friend.
SPEAKER_01Well, I don't you I don't know where we're at with this, but you totally your Wi-Fi totally blitzed you out for me for like that last couple seconds.
SPEAKER_00Oh, I actually the dog was having a nightmare, so I decided to mute myself and wake her up.
SPEAKER_01I couldn't even tell what was going on.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I was like, maybe I should mute this before we start having howling. Uh no, that was great though. This is what living you is about, because we talked about living rich.
SPEAKER_01And yeah, my Brazilian dad doctor, yeah. And his uh his insatiable thirst for medical knowledge.
SPEAKER_00I mean, but if he has it to share it in that environment, I was thinking too, which I didn't I didn't say, but like that's the perfect environment for him to talk to people later in life, like how to stay healthy. That's such a beautiful contribution he made to his community. Like that's really awesome. It also shows a very strong uh character as well. Like he can be smart, but also, you know, he he cares about the people around him and and will help them if he can. So that's I love that. That is what spoke to me.
SPEAKER_01He's a smooth operator too, man. Like the first two minutes, you know, he was just kind of smooth talking, thanking the people like he was running the show. It was so cool. And I was thinking to the because I've told you before, like I kind of socially have evolved, right? I was I was very shy and I've gotten better and better and better. So like by the time I'm 80, like I'm just gonna be like up in front of a crowd, be like, Thank you so much, Melissa, for introducing me.
SPEAKER_00And like Melissa, oh she's gonna be our MC at some point. No, that's amazing. And and probably you guys are very similar. Probably there's a lot of he's definitely an introvert too. Yeah, yeah, but probably you could get up and you can have a talk like that as well, just just like he did. And you're probably very similar in that way. So that's awesome. That's a good role model.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Um Yeah, you said a lot in there that I was gonna add on to, but um, you mentioned your like your empath stuff, and we don't want to, we don't we can do it another time, but that's the other part of your that does not I I don't understand that at all. You walk into a room or a house and you're like, ooh, something like something happened here or whatever. And I'm like, I don't know, I see a cabinet.
SPEAKER_00Well, it's funny because I don't I actually don't allow myself to feel more. Um, and some people, you know, have very amazing gifts like mediums or like, you know, they really can feel energy. I actually don't really, again, I'm hardwired for caution. So if I had that ability, I definitely have stifled it because I don't want to talk to grandma today, who's been dead for 20 years. I really have no time for this. I don't want to be exposed to the it freaks me out. So I feel like I probably could um at some point in my life open up a little bit more uh and really feel things. But there's definitely been houses I go into and you can you can feel the energy, but more so with my clients, like I I can feel their energy and I I can read them really well. I think that's what makes me really good at sales and gives me a very high level of customer service. My reviews are stellar, by the way, all five stars, because I hear what they're not saying, I feel what they're not telling me, and I can respond to them on a deeper level that they don't even really realize. I I read people as I'm sitting there and I'm like, okay, so this person has this personality or this is going to be important to them, or I and I know I probably shouldn't make a joke, you know, about that. Like that seems like an important like I literally I'm constantly reading and processing information like the computers we are, processing information on how to win in this relationship again, because that's hardwired, hardwired again for my survival. How do I win in this relationship? Not make an off-colored joke or not say the wrong thing or not make a comment that hurts them or upsets them or pisses them off. So I'm always reviewing everything that is being said and is being done so that I know how to adjust my words, my behavior, you know, and how I and my approach, which is also exhausting, by the way. Which is also exhausting.
SPEAKER_01Well, but that's self-editing. And it's exhausting for you too. Being reflective enough to be capable of self-editing is I think a huge skill. And maybe this is where I I we gotta wrap this up. But I mean, I think that's a skill that maybe we're to some degree losing or something like that. I don't know where I'm going with that, but uh like temperament, like self-control, uh knowing that what I'm what I'm saying is is not connecting or is even pushing someone away, or you know, those are things that um those are those are those are that's social currency is being able to understand how what you're saying is landing on the people around you.
SPEAKER_00Yes, that's exactly what I was gonna say. Is like how how are you making the other person feel right now? Because I'm I want that other person to feel good. I want every interaction I have that when I walk away, that person's like, oh, that was a nice interaction. And I leave them very positively. So I work very, very, very hard on that. Where you're right, we're losing that people are just they're them, and then you know, they kind of move through the frame and then they're out again. And they do they really know how they affected the people around them? Um, I might be too aware of it, but it's definitely good to have some awareness of how you're landing and breathe, don't resist, and let things fall into place. Sometimes you're doing too much, and I'm learning that because I am doing too much. I know that I'm doing too much, but I'm that's like the lesson I'm working on right now is breathe, don't resist, don't fight, don't clench, don't edit, and just let the next thing unfold without me having my stamp on it at all. Because a lot of times things are gonna be just fine. It doesn't require you to put in effort in every moment, and that's my next kind of evolution of you know what I'm working on now.
SPEAKER_01Well, you continue to change, like you, like you said earlier. Um, changing whether we're aware of it or not is is the question. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00That's right. And you will not even know who I am by next week.
SPEAKER_01It's just a fear. This happens every every every every whatever, every other week there's a new, there's a new life plan. Oh my Jesus.
SPEAKER_00Oh yeah, we gotta deal with now. I will yeah, but listen, I've been doing this for about six months now. This is great. I hit this six-month mark of like staying in and being dedicated to the plan. But again, it has to feel good. So if it continues to feel good, then we're in good shape. If it doesn't feel good, then why should we do it?
SPEAKER_01On that note, Jess, I have to wrap it up. Um, thank you so much for this bonus time today. I don't even know if we're gonna call this an episode or what this is an episode.
SPEAKER_00It's 39 minutes of like yumminess of just off the cuff who we are, living us. We're gonna call this one Living Us. Thank you for staying on our podcast and coming back. And stay tuned next week for more real estate things. But in the meantime, enjoy Living Us with Jess and Rich.