The Best Financial Advice My Clients Ever Received... Or Wish They Had

What's the best financial advice you've ever received... or wish you had? I recently asked my clients that question.

In this episode, I'm sharing five of the most memorable stories, along with the lessons behind them. From first paychecks and 401(k)s to raising children, making emotional money decisions, and building lasting financial habits, these are timeless reminders that can help all of us make smarter financial choices.

My hope is that one of these stories stays with you, so years from now, you won't find yourself saying, "I wish someone had told me."

Hosted by Tracy Byrnes, MBA, CDFA
Vice President, Women & Investing, Lebenthal Global Advisors

If you've got a question, a topic suggestion, or just want to say hi, shoot us an email at TracyByrnesWealth@gmail.com!

Follow us on:

X: @TracyByrnes
Instagram: @TracyByrnesWealth

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:03

Hey, and welcome back to Women, Wealth, and What Matters. I'm Tracy Burns, Vice President of Women and Investing at Leavenville Global Advisors. I'm a certified divorced financial analyst. I was a business journalist for a bunch of years. And as always, I'm super grateful that you are spending a little time with us today. Whether you're listening on Spotify or Apple Podcasts, Amazon, music, YouTube, whatever, wherever you get your podcast, thank you for listening and downloading and all that. If you've listened before, welcome back. If it's your first time, hello. I'm glad you found us. All right, so every other week we talk a little bit about money and all its different shapes and forms, but more importantly, we talk about life because you can't talk about money without talking about emotion and life and all those things. And after all these years of being in the business, I've learned a bunch of stuff. But one of them, and the biggest, is that money is rarely just about money. It's just not. It's about your family, it's about your relationships, it's about opportunity, security. Ultimately, it's about what matters most. People often ask me, like, what's the best lesson you can give as a financial advisor? And the funny thing is, that answer isn't like in a textbook. And it's certainly not what I learned doing my MBA, which I can't even remember it. I was such a poor student. It's actually an embarrassment. It certainly is not what I found from becoming a certified divorce financial analyst. Those experiences gave me the technical knowledge I need, not the soft, squishy stuff, though. They taught me how the markets work and how retirement plans are built, and of course, how to guide women through divorce. Families help them retire with confidence, things like that. But that gave me great perspective. But when you talk to people and you talk to clients all the time, you start to hear about the things that keep them up at night, the things they want to celebrate, the things they regret. And most importantly, perhaps the things they wish they knew sooner. And you know what's interesting? After all these years, people don't often say, I really wish I bought more of X stock. Instead, I hear things like, I wish someone had explained this to me sooner, or I wish I started earlier doing this. I wish we talked about money sooner in my house. I wish I had known then what I know now, and we could extrapolate that out. My producer and I were just talking about marriage. Like that's a whole nother podcast. These conversations stay with me though, because they hurt my heart. We are very hard on ourselves. Everyone's like, God, I wish I did this sooner. And they they're they're almost mad at themselves for not saving that extra penny along the way. Or a woman who's just recently getting divorced, God, I wish I saved more of my own money. You can't do that to yourself. But you have to learn from them. All these conversations have made me a better advisor, though, because behind every investment account is a person, and behind every balance sheet statement is a family. And family sit at the kitchen table and they crunch out these numbers on the regular. And behind almost every financial decision is an emotion. So today we're gonna do something different. I had mentioned last time that I was turning the mic on you guys. I had asked you to share lessons, conversations that you have had over the years. What changed you? What did you wish you knew? What were the best financial lessons you got? And of course, to protect my clients and their privacy, their names have been changed, the stories have been tweaked, but the lessons are very real. And my hope is simple that one of these stories touches you at exactly the right time, so that you don't turn around from years from now and say, God, I wish I knew this then. Or better yet, maybe you tell a kid or you tell a student, you tell somebody. You don't want, I don't want people to wake up in their 70s and say, I wish someone had told me. That's like a bummer. That's too reflective and almost sad for me. Okay, so the first story. I love this. Very deep client, a client near and dear to me in more ways than one, told me that when she graduated, I just gave it away. I should have said they. I'm not good at those pronouns, I have to admit. They um her she got her very first job, and her friend's dad invited a bunch of college girls to sit down, to go over to the house and have a conversation. Now, let me just stop there. This, I want to hug this man because back then he took a bunch of girls in their 20s and said, I'm gonna teach you about money. Like that's a mic drop to me right now. That's so beautiful. And he was so ahead of his time doing that. He happened to be a portfolio manager and he could have talked about the hottest stocks. He could have tried to impress everyone with market predictions and all the nonsensical stuff that the finance bros do on the regular that we don't want to hear about. Instead, he just gave them simple, simple advice. Contribute to your 401k. And at the time, these girls had no idea what it was. So he took the time to explain it to them. Of course, always get the company match. That is something I beat my drum on for young people. At least contribute to the company match. But imagine being there 20 years and you're like, oh my God, I have a company match. All those years of not knowing that, like, that does hurt my heart a little bit. If you're will if your employer is willing to match part of your retirement contribution, never leave that on the table. And finally, set up an automatic investment into something. You know, a little ETF that follows the stock market or something. Just have it automatic. Five dollars. It doesn't have to be a big, massive number. Don't think about you can't you have to have it done automatically. You can't say, oh, I'm gonna pay all my bills and my credit card and buy all the things I need on Amazon and then I'll do it because you won't do it. And you can't wait till the market feels safe and you can't wait. There's never a perfect time. Trust me, just do it every month automatically. That's it. No complicated strategy. Get it in the market nice and simple. Don't try to beat the market. Just follow along. And then you fast forward 30 years, and all those that year, those years of dollar cost averaging, you're gonna like kick your heels up and be thrilled. It's gonna be like an automatic windfall. And what I love, again, what I love about this story is that someone cared enough to teach 22-year-old girls how wealth is built. Bravo to him all day long. I think we overcomplicate investing. I think I've said that multiple times. We convince ourselves that we need to know everything before we dive in. We don't. You don't need to pick the perfect stock, the perfect time, whatever. All you need to do is start. You know what's funny? My old firm used to use this analogy. Um, kale. I'm gonna use it with you right now. Kale. Kale to me is like eating wood. And yet, someone out there, whoever he or she may be, because if I see you in a dark alley, I'm gonna take you down, said that we should be eating kale on the regular. So all of us now are eating kale. No questions asked. Kale is everywhere. Kale, by the way, in my world used to be the garnish at the Pizza Hut salad bar. And now it's like Queen kale, we have to eat kale. But you don't ask questions about kale. No one even knows what kind of vitamins it has. You just eat kale. When it comes to the stock market, though, we feel like we need a doctorate in finance and need to memorize charts. It's the same thing. You trust the kale, trust the stock market. Get that money working. And I love that gentleman for doing that. Just get in, start. That's all you need to know. And now, can you think back on who taught you about a 401k? Did someone? Did you learn it on your own? Do you know someone who needs to learn about this stuff? Just go out there and spread the love. Pass it on, spread the love. Who encouraged you to invest every month or save every month? I'll tell you straight up, my mother used to have these envelopes when I was a kid, and she would save money in these envelopes. And in my brain, I always created little envelopes. Many days those envelopes have big old zero balance, but that's neither here nor there. Conversations happen and they bring this brings so it brings me to my next story, which I love. Financial ed is one of the greatest gifts we can give to each other. And someone said to me, I wish someone had said that retirement planning starts your very first paycheck, not in your 30s. Now, this goes back to the other story of starting your 401k, but I think the interesting part is this person grew up in an immigrant family, right? Working hard was expected, saving money was expected, education was everything. But what the heck was a 401k? They had no idea. They didn't know about IRAs, Roth IRAs, employer matches. I know this is gonna age me, but really, we really did put money under the mattress back in the day. We really did. And these people did too. I know that sounds crazy, but we did. These conversations just didn't happen to immigrant families. And it wasn't because they didn't care, they just truly didn't know. They sacrificed everything to give their kids opportunity. They just didn't know the systems, social security here in the United States. Who knows? So many European countries take such better care of their elderly than we do. It's actually disgusting some days here in the United States. So they didn't know, they didn't explain to them. And it's really hard to tell a kid in his or her 20s that you need to start saving for, well, now your 90s, because we're gonna live like forever. We will be tails from the crypt walking up and down the streets because of all the things out there. Everybody's using serums and GLP1s and whatever you we're not dying. So now you really have to start saving. Maybe that's the conversation. Because we're going to live forever, you need to start saving in your 20s, or you're never gonna be able to afford it. So have these conversations, start these conversations. I think that's a brilliant conversation, though. And I love that she said that. Like they work so hard, these immigrants, but they just didn't know about the retirement options they had. Again, they used their mattress. Think about all those years of inflation that they missed because it wasn't their money wasn't invested. The point wasn't the money, the point was the habit, right? That's what they were trying to say and embark on their kids. Save, save, save. We're I'm taking it a step further and saying, save in something that's going to make you money. Save from the first paycheck. And I know you're gonna throw up to all the first timers out there when you get your first paycheck out of college. You're gonna throw up because half of it goes to the government. Get that over with, puke in your shoes, and then put your big person panties on and realize you have to start saving for your 90s now. I know it's ridiculous. But it's true. It's true. Keep using all those serums, you're gonna need all that money. Teaching our young people to save can save your family, save the economy. Because who the heck knows what's gonna happen with Social Security at the end of the day? So I pray that my children get it. What I know right now is my children are working very hard to pay for my Social Security. That's all I got. So teach them, encourage them, remind them that in their 90s they're going to need some money. It begins with that very first paycheck. As parents, we send we spend so much time teaching our kids to drive, prepare for interviews. I was just helping my daughter. We want them to be kind and work hard, but how many of us actually sit down and teach about money? Because you know, you damn well know the schools don't. They do they try, but they don't. You don't have to be an expert here. You don't need to know where the market is or where the bond yields are or even what that even means. No one cares. No one cares. Start a conversation, get them interested, remind them, and I used to use this analogy all the time: a share of Nike stock versus the Nike sneakers that you're gonna trash in the next six months and they will be worthless. But watch that share, watch how that share is gonna make you money. I say that firsthand. My kid owned Nike as a young when he was really young, and it just went to the moon. That's a simple example. You don't need a PhD to explain that to them. It's confidence. You're just giving them confidence. And we want them to start that from day one, that very first paycheck. If I live to 90, by the way, someone give me a little black pill. I don't want to be that old. All right. Good habits matter more than those big paychecks. This is the same thing, but same concept. I love these old stories. Not because, you know, kids need money, but you're never too young to get a job. I was 12 years old when I started working. So child labor laws be damned. But every summer since I was 12, I was working. My family had a business. We worked in the family business. Not because we needed, I needed the money, I wasn't going anywhere at 12, but it's because it created confidence and responsibility, and my family instilled that on us. And that's those are the things from a very young age that we need to teach our kids. I get it, they're overscheduled. And who has dance camp and has to go away on baseball tournaments and all the things? I did all that too. Holding a job is not never gonna hurt a kid. Teaches them responsibility, gives them pride, improves their character. Think back to your first job. I do think back to mine right now, and I filed, and I my cuticles still bleed when I think about pushing papers into filing cabinets. Nobody files probably anymore because everything is probably automated, right? Yeah, probably. Um, I filed papers. It was cringy, cringy. But I remember it. Maybe you had a better job. Maybe you got to scoop ice cream. I would have been 400 pounds. That's why I didn't do that. Work retail. I did do, I did work retail. That was really fun. Babysitting. No, I was terrible with kids back then. Waiting tables. What did you do? What was your first job? Think about it. Think about what you learned from it. I guarantee you, you are still using some of the things you learned on that first job today. And you're proud, you got paid, you got money. I don't know. I think it's great. I think there's something about earning your own money. Start the kids young. And I'm gonna take this story a step forward and say if you have a business, a small business, employ your children and open a Roth. I've talked about this multiple times. We did a podcast on the Roth. Employ your children as long as they have earned income. They could, they could sweep, they could push a broom around at 12. I know I did. Employ them, open a Roth. If they need earned income, make them earn it. And then you start to begin. That money just doesn't magically magically appear. I have to tell you, Apple Pay might be the worst thing in the world for our kids. Because they think that there's this big apple cloud in the sky that bang, you you put your phone on one of those things and the money comes out of the air. What? It's ridiculous. I was it's ridiculous. Let's teach them. Let's not create entitled little brats. Come on now. They need to learn how to work hard, become dependable, and that's a lesson that stays with you for years. One of the greatest gifts we could give our kids is teaching them about the confidence that comes from earning it, from having responsibility, teaching them that every paycheck has a job to do. And you're gonna spend some of that money, sure, but you're gonna save some of it as well, and you're gonna invest some of it. You always think about your paycheck in three buckets. Save, invest, spend on the things you need to eat, live, and breathe. And repeat, that's it. It's very simple. It's the Dave Ramsey theory. Same thing. Over time, those little habits become bigger and bigger, and you pay yourself first and you remember what you learned from that first job. I'm telling you, everyone's got a story about that first job. Okay, lesson number four don't let emotions make financial decisions. Now, this one I see a lot, and I have to say I'm guilty of this. And I've caught myself doing it over the year. A client told me that they loved paying things off. It just made them feel good to pay things off. No debt. No debt. But it doesn't always make the best financial sense. It sure made them feel accomplished, and I completely understand that. And there's something about putting that big red check next to something. So satisfying, crossing debt off the list. But you know how rich people get richer? Debt. They use other people's money. So let's think about this. I get it, you feel responsible, you feel lighter. Sometimes that it is the best decision, but sometimes it's not. You know, I've watched people to rush off paying mortgages. I can't sleep with a mortgage. You have your mortgage is 3%. What are you doing? What are you doing? Yet you have credit card debt of, you know, that's over 20%. So that's okay to have, but I can't sleep with a mortgage. Come on, let's be logical here. Let's be logical. Don't throw every extra dollar at low-interest federal student loans when you don't have an emergency fund. Let the government hold on. The government can wait. Do you have that emergency fund? If that rate on your student loans is 3%. Let it be. Let it be. Make sure that emergency fund is first taken care of. And I say this to all those college kids out there. Emergency fund first, let the government wait. You do not need to pay off the government. I don't know. I remember a few years ago when we were had these high yield savings accounts that were paying like 5%. I was watching people empty these accounts to pay off debt that was costing them less. Think about that. Come on, you're smarter than that. And again, rich people use other people's money. So if you and I know, like we're encouraged to not carry debt, and especially immigrant families. No debt, no debt, no debt. But sometimes it makes financial sense. Sometimes my biggest job isn't like picking investments, it's helping people separate that emotion from the math. Like, you know, again, I can't sleep at night with a mortgage. I don't know. I slept for years just fine with a mortgage, and it was big. And I did just fine because the rate was so darn low for so long. Just think it through. Put your emotions somewhere else. Money isn't just numbers on a spreadsheet. Unfortunately, it's tied to our childhood and our culture and our fears and dreams and guilts and parents telling us no debt, no debt, no debt. But attached, you have to detach the emotion. The goal isn't to completely remove it, I get it, but it's to be smart about the emotion. I want you to have emotions, but let's use them smart. We're human. I get it. It's impossible not to feel about feel things. But the goal is to recognize when you're saying, all right, this is emotional decision I'm making right now. It's not the one, the mathematical one. Sometimes seeing things on paper, when you see the difference in the two numbers, and you're like, okay, I can't fight that. Maybe that's easy. Maybe that's better. Maybe that's the way you need to see it. Sometimes you just need to pause and ask yourself that is this a smart financial decision, or is it just one that makes me feel good about myself? There's a lot of ways to make yourself feel good. Go get a manicure that works for me every time.

unknown 18:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 18:48

Having someone in your corner to help you make these decisions sometimes is helpful. Sometimes I feel like I'm a referee, right? I'm married to nothing, literally. Nothing. Like your decisions, I'm just looking at what's in your best interest. So having a third party sometimes is not such a bad idea. Incredibly valuable. Make thoughtful decisions, not emotional ones. This last lesson, I absolutely adored. I love this person. Um they are doing a very good job at managing households with working parents, kids. And what they said to me was, I wish someone had warned how expensive kids really are. Now, I'm gonna I'm gonna big fat caveat this. I would have had like 14 kids if my pesky little divorce didn't get in the way. Kids are fabulous, and you figure it's god, I don't know, whatever you believe in, God in my world, God helps you figure it out. I would have had a ton of kids. But I would be lying if I didn't tell you that they are bloody expensive. No matter how old they are, they're still expensive, says the woman who's now planning a wedding. Says, like, you know, I know I did all the baseball uh tournaments. We're getting on planes for 14-year-old boys. What? I did it all. I was there. Oh, the dance stuff. The dance stuff. We had a closet of costumes. Closet of costumes. Like like more sequins than any drag queen has ever seen.

unknown 20:24

Anyway.

SPEAKER_00 20:25

She's not complaining about these kids, but what she's saying is nobody tells you about the costs. How do you plan? And I will also add to this story in that I didn't think that through when I got divorced the first time. I didn't think through and had no idea, because my kids were peanuts, that my oldest daughter was going to be in all these dance competitions, and that my son was going to be doing traveling baseball, and then my youngest now traveling softball. Like we, as co-parents, had no idea that all these expenses were gonna come up. We just don't know. Nobody tells you how much they're gonna cost. Uh the kids are gonna cost, and it's not just college. College is ridiculous. I'm sorry. She was my person was talking more about daycare, summer camp, again, sports, dance lessons, braces. That's a racket. Someone better I I'm coming back as an orthodontist. Those first cars, of course, and then helping them prepare for college, who's hiring tutors and all the things and job interviews and maybe the first apartment help. It just, it's, it's just keeps going, right? And you know, uh parents in their 70s are still helping kids in their 50s. So like it just doesn't end. They're they're our greatest blessing, though, but they're also one of life's biggest financial commitments. And this person said something that was even more important to me. She wished that someone had encouraged her, them, to buy life insurance on the primary caregiver. So, like, we often buy life insurance on the person making all the money. Okay, that I get that. But what about the person that is busting his or her butt? The daily to make sure little Johnny gets to school, the homework's done, you know, we got new clothes for the prom, like all the things. What about that person? I think that's brilliant. Think about that. So many families ensure the person bringing home the biggest paycheck, and I get that. But what about the parent that does like the that has like the whiteboard of schedule coordination going on, makes the doctor's appointments, does all the things, gets everybody where they need to be. That in and of itself is a logistical nightmare when you have more than one child. When you run a household, I swear to God, this should be a line item on a resume. If you run a household every day, maybe there should be life insurance on you. Because if you go, man, that other person is lost. Lost. That's all I'm saying. While we're talking about families, this person does such a beautiful job of splitting household responsibilities, running the household as a CEO, and divvying out responsibilities. Everyone should have a role. I think that is a beautiful lesson. Again, teaches our kids responsibility from a very young age. And that is down to dinner. I think they all take turns cooking. Just saying. I'm just saying. Okay. The people at home, though, let's hat tip them because they know everything. They know the teachers, the pediatricians, where all the important documents are. They know the passwords. They know all the things. What if they go? God forbid. Just saying. One person should not carry the entire mental load of the household. I've talked to this before. It's not just the woman who's the stay-at-home in the dark. What about if the tables were turned and she was working and he's doing all the stay-at-home stuff? What happens if, God forbid, he gets hit by the proverbial bus? Life happens, man. Sometimes unexpectedly. Resilience isn't about having enough money, it's about making sure everyone knows how to keep moving bus forward, moving forward. Some of the most valuable things in a family never show up on a balance sheet. Just true. All right. When I first started putting this episode together, I thought I was going to be writing more about investments and like stock ideas. And it wasn't about that at all. And I had more stories, and I want to do this again. And I hope you keep writing to me and telling me your financial lessons that someone taught you along the way. Because I really do believe it is way more about what's going on in the stock market and where Tesla closes today. Nobody cares. And I remember my grandfather once saying, if you work, you get paid. You never work for free. And meanwhile, some days I feel like I give away the farm. But I remember that. I do remember that. It's these habits and conversations and hope. And every client has taught me something, made me a better person, made me a better advisor, made me more resilient. And I love hearing their stories because just when you know you think that you you're it's hard, someone has had it harder and survived it. It's just sometimes a good reminder for all of us. So if there's one thing I hope you take away from this episode, it is this. You do not need to know everything. You don't even have to have a perfect financial plan. You don't have to make every perfect decision. You just have to start somewhere. Please, please, please encourage your young ones to start at a young age. Please, please, please try to encourage them to find little side jobs as kids. The old lemonade stand. What a way to go. Teach the kids, perfect your family. That's all you need. One day you're gonna look back and say, I'm so glad I did. I don't want you to look back and say, God, I wish someone had told me that. Thank you for spending your time with me. As I rambled, share this with someone who needs to hear it. You know you can find us on Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon Music, and of course YouTube. And if you'd like to continue the conversation, always you can find me, tracyburnswealth.com, of course, Tracy Burns on X, Tracy BurnsWealth on Instagram. If this episode meant something to you, I'd appreciate it if you shared it with someone. Please subscribe, leave a review, do something, help. I love all this stuff. I want to keep doing it. Share with a friend. This is how we'll continue to grow as a community and help more women, more people feel more confident about their financial future. As always, I'm here if you need me. I'll see you next time. Labenthal Financial Services, Inc. is a FINRA registered broker dealer. The content of this podcast is intended for informational purposes only and is not intended to be investment advice. The views expressed in this podcast are subject to change based on market and other conditions. Information about the qualifications and business practices of Labenthal Global Advisors LLC is available on the SEC's website at www.advisorinfo.sec.gov. Information about the qualifications and business practices of Labenthal Financial Services Inc. and its representatives can be found on FINRA's broker check website, which is brokercheck.org.