Episode 9: "The Triple Dipper"

11:00 – Stefon Diggs acquitted of assault charges 

25:10 – Spirit Airlines closes down

32:14 – Megan Thee Stallion & Klay Thompson breakup

46:49 – KevOnStage says a man’s feelings about Meg Thee Stallion is a litmus test

53:04 – Good love brings out everything that you haven’t dealt with yet

01:07:36 – Stephen A Smith says women expecting money early from a man won’t get far

01:23:19 – Charleston White speaks on the reverence men need to pay to women

01:40:06 – Can Druski save the BET Awards

01:42:18 – Man won’t move in with me because he questions my parenting

01:46:50 – My man still takes care of his grown children. Am I wrong for feeling a way?

01:49:42 – How do I communicate better with my wife after changing my old ways?

01:59:57 – Every time I address something I don’t like, he feels like I’m attacking him

02:04:27 – Every time I tell him, I miss him, he asks what I called for

02:11:27 – If a guy loses his job and has bad kids, is it wrong to still spend time with him? 

Transcript

SPEAKER_16 0:00

Man, back at it again. Hey. Trill Academy. Episode nine. Episode nine. We here. You know what I'm saying? Like we always say. Pull up a chair. Get your notepad out. Get you something to sip on. Alcoholic, non-alcoholic, whatever it is, popcorn, you want a meal, pull it up, get a friend, tell a friend, family member, husband, wife, it don't matter. Just pull them to the carpet. You know what I'm saying? And we're gonna hear, we're gonna give you this lesson from Trill Academy. You know what I'm saying? So B, how you been, man? How you? Mental, mental health check.

SPEAKER_15 0:39

Man, um I feel great, man. I ain't gonna lie. If it's one to ten today, I feel like about a nine. You know what I mean? Um, you know, it's a lot of things going well. I feel like I'm getting my affairs in order in uh in a way that's way more attentive than I have in the past. Um and also just taking time to kind of just enjoy the journey of things. Uh this podcast included, man. Um P been showing us a lot of support. It's been a lot of views on the clips, it's been a lot of subscribers, it's been a lot of, you know, downloads uh as far as audio only listens, man. And for everybody who, if this is your first time uh hearing us, we're available on all streaming platforms. That's Apple, that's Spotify, that's iHeart. Anywhere that you stream podcasts, we are there. Um and for the full video, it's patreon.com backslash trill academy. So make sure that y'all tap in. Um, but again, salute to everybody that already tapped in. And like I say, I'm just enjoying the journey of this thing. Um, I think it's being built in a very authentic way. Um I I love the conversations. You know what I mean? I feel like we're helping a lot of people, um, which is the goal of this thing. So I feel great, bro.

SPEAKER_16 1:58

How about you? I'm great, man. I'm great, I'm great, I'm great. You know, just taking care of the fam. Um locked in, looking for other opportunities. I got a few like video stuff lined up. Um got some exciting news that then I I do plan to share soon. I got the okay, so it's just a matter of how I want to roll it out. Um yeah, man, I feel like it's just it's on the up and up. Um I got another another opportunity, potential opportunity. We should see how that looks in the next three, four weeks at the J. For now. Right. You know, it's gonna be a stepping stool. But uh, opportunity be, you got an exec position open out here. Perfect. It's gonna be right down the street. Perfect. So um a lot of people have been um been praising me, honestly, before they even came up. Um like I've been talking with the CEO, CFO. Come on now. They've been they've been seeing me doing my one-two. Come on now. So, you know. I ain't trying to, you know, do that little shoulder shrug or nothing, but you know, I feel confident that, you know, they could be mine. Hey, man. So, you know what I'm saying? Gotta feed the fam.

SPEAKER_15 3:17

I already know you've been putting the work in, man. You've been putting the work in forever. I'm just glad you're getting the recognition.

SPEAKER_16 3:21

Yeah, man. And I I think too, it's just honestly, it's it's just a matter of like just proximity. Um, that's the main thing because where I've been in the past, it's not like the quote unquote like flagship spots.

SPEAKER_04 3:36

Right.

SPEAKER_16 3:37

So I think that's what's helping me more than anything. And then me being in a completely different department, and I'm turning that motherfucker around too. So they see like, oh, okay, he got his hand over here, and this shit changing to the point where uh the owner of the Texans' daughter, Miss McNair, Hannah McNair, she stopped me, hollered at me, and was like, damn, oh like, hey, we got some, we got some teams out here. It's a lot of teams. Hey, I'm telling you, I'm doing my one too. Ah, yeah. Then that got that got to the CEO. So he stopped me. He was like, hey, man, I heard like things going. I was like, yeah, man. You know what I'm saying? Come on. You know, hey, it's light work for me. Come on. You know what I'm saying? Just put me in the vicinity and I'm gonna do what I do. Motion gonna travel, man. So, yes, man. Um, and then we just opened up like a little recovery center. Um, got like massage chairs, crowd lounge, red sauna, stuff like that. And so I just took it upon myself. I made a little, made a little video doing what I do, do my one-two, 30 seconds, did a little voiceover. Everybody heard about it. Niggas called me, one person called me Morgan Freeman. So I heard you were the Morgan Freeman of the YMCA. My boyfriend said voiceover work, man. I say I do a little bit on the, you know, on the side. I might have a little experience. Come on now. You know what I'm saying? They don't really know. But uh Man of many hats. You know what I'm saying? But yeah, but I mean, it's it's been it's been good, man. Um really been having fun, just just with life in general, trying to get more balance, um being more intentional, you know, with things. Mm-hmm. Um, taking care of myself. I mean, just just kind of everything, man. Just really trying to, you know, not not be afraid of really for me, I think it's just not being afraid of being tired. It's like, I'll I'll get some sleep when I get some sleep. Right. You know what I mean? It's like I need to take care of what I need to take care of first. Um making the post on social media, like just being intentional about that, taking the time out. All right, I'm gonna spend this 20 minutes, caption right, edit this, you know, it all of that. Just being intentional about every single thing that I'm doing.

SPEAKER_04 5:49

Right.

SPEAKER_16 5:49

Um, yeah, man, you know what I'm saying? It's starting to starting to see it, you know what I'm saying, come out, man. So I love it. Yeah, yeah. I'm just being way more intentional about every single thing I do.

SPEAKER_15 6:01

Right. So yeah. I gotta say, which is which is which is what it's about. I mean, the the work ethic ain't never been an issue. It's just about which direction it's aimed in. So, you know, the dope part about it is you done you done aimed it in the right direction, it's just starting to pay off. So now, ain't no excuse. It's on you.

SPEAKER_09 6:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_15 6:22

You know what I mean? And and and you know, that's what everybody listening to this, bro. It's just a matter of figuring out what my purpose is. What do I want to do? What are my goals? And really like one day in it at a time. But just like you said, we only get 24 hours. So you gotta take advantage. It ain't no tomorrow. It ain't no, ah, that can wait, that can wait, this can wait. Cause that's how you end up years and not accomplishing what it is that you want to accomplish, man. But man, you gotta go get it. Do something every day, accomplish something every day. Small wins. That's what give you the confidence. That's what, you know, if you stack enough of those together, you're gonna look up like, damn, I'm way past where I started. So, again, man, yeah, I'm proud of you, brother.

SPEAKER_16 7:05

I gotta do one more. Ain't a rat. Ain't a rat, but it's about AU. Uh me and Green. I want to shout out to my boys, man, Coach Green, Coach Chris, Coach Christian, Coach Ryan, Phil, um, Howard, I mean everybody, all the coaches. Um, man, shout out to y'all. Really appreciate y'all for pointing to the kids, you know, spending y'all time week after week, tournament days, having to be there all day sometimes. Um people coach multiple teams, so they really there all day, Saturday and Sunday. And y'all still take care of home too. So, man, I just want to say I appreciate y'all. Shout out to y'all for, you know, pointing to the kids, helping them develop and help them grow. Right. Um Aiden just played in a tournament this past weekend. It's called uh the Road to Nationals tournament. And boys, they finished second place. You know what I'm saying? So came up just short. Came up just short, but second place is still recognition. True. And um they played, I think the team that they lost to was like number, I said like ranked number two or number three in the state. Oh, that's crazy. According to their age group. So um they fought hard. They they lost about like a like a 20-piece, something like that. It was the score was worse than what really what it was, though. It kind of got out of hand like later on. Trash points at the end. But yeah, but some of them boys, though, like, them kids, they hoop hoop. Like, that's their life. You know, our kids, you know, most of them come from a more privilege environment. You know what I mean? So it's just a different edge, you know. Our kids play hard, but you know, some of them kids, they just a lot taller, they just more skilled, they just fluent. I mean, they pulling up like the NBA agents. Yeah. I make a swing, swing, shop, swing, swing, shot. You know what I'm saying? There's only so much you can do, no matter how hard and good you play. Right. Um, but I mean, they did, they did a hell of a job, man, because they played them for uh like the seeding, the little play-in stuff. It was ugly. First night. First night was ugly. But we won all the rest of our games, and so we played them again a championship. And that was much, much better. Much, much better. I mean, to the point where like I think at halftime we was only down five. So like that speaks volumes to a team that's supposed to be ranked second third, third in the state. In the state. You know what I mean? So shout out to all of them again. Shout out to Coach Green, just he's building his system and things like that. And he's still, I think he's only like probably like three years in. So he's still fairly new, playing against systems that's been around for a while. You know what I mean? So yeah, man. I think boys, they they in they in good hands.

SPEAKER_15 9:44

Ah, for so salute to bro, man. I'm I'm I'm always here for pouring back into the kids, bro. That right there is of the utmost importance. You know, we play sports, so a lot of coaching and stuff is real parent figures that motherfuckers may not have at the house. You know what I mean? So for boys to be putting in that work and I already know how rough it is, getting off work and having to come work again.

SPEAKER_16 10:05

Fight trash, fight trap and pour it to the kids, man.

SPEAKER_15 10:08

But yeah, nah, man, salute to it.

SPEAKER_16 10:10

And they teach them life lessons. Right. It ain't just basketball. You know what I mean? They really teach them adversity and you know, overcoming and how to keep your head up when things aren't going your way. Like all they really do be pointing to them and I appreciate it. And they give me a chance to talk sometimes. Because I work with them during the week on drills. So I don't like coach coach, but you know, I help them facilitate stuff. And so after practice, they'll give all the coaches like a couple minutes to say what they like or what they need to work on or any type of praise or things like that. Give them a little one, two, every nine, and then you know what I'm saying? I already told you.

SPEAKER_15 10:44

It's a matter of time. It's a matter of time before you got a clipboard on. You already know. You already know. Once I get more free time, it's a wrap. It's a wrap. I already know. All right, but let's stay at sports, man. Stefan Diggs um recently was acquitted for the assault charges. So he was being sued by a chef. Now he had a personal chef, uh, brought her in, and you know, they engaged in a bit of an entanglement for a while. But, you know, Stefan Diggs infinite infamously uh has entanglements with a lot of women. And apparently things went left. You understand? And she claimed that he put his hands on her, knocked her unconscious, all type of things. So she ends up suing him uh for approximately five million dollars. They go to court and the court case has just ended. Stefan Diggs is acquitted. We're gonna play some clips from the or play a clip from the court proceeding. Now, this court proceeding was shown on TV. It was shown on TV. So we got to see witness testimony, we got to see the whole trial, basically. And the woman who accused Stefan Diggs made herself look very bad. Um, so much so the way even women on social media was going against her. You understand? So one of the main clips is what we're gonna play. They ended up catching her in a lie. She claims that she never got paid uh for her services for Stefan Diggs. We're gonna play the clip and see exactly how that played out in court. I can't believe she did this shit.

SPEAKER_10 12:32

And it turned out, Miss Adams, you had gotten paid for two of the three weeks that you said you hadn't gotten paid for, right?

SPEAKER_02 12:43

This is missing a whole lot of stuff.

SPEAKER_10 12:46

Yes or no question.

SPEAKER_02 12:47

I can't answer your question correctly without it.

SPEAKER_10 13:06

Do you recognize this document as changes between you and funny? Date of December 9, 2025. And you're the person in the buffet on the left. And you write to say, hey, so I looked over my transfers payment history, and they said payment 117 and 1121 totaling $3,000. See that?

SPEAKER_02 13:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_10 13:46

So you know that you would actually get paid for two of those three weeks that you try to get paid for again, right?

SPEAKER_03 13:55

Did you know that I was trying to cut you by the way? I don't know. I can't incorrectly.

SPEAKER_10 14:12

You knew on December 9th that you had been paid for two of the three weeks. You said you hadn't been paid for.

SPEAKER_03 14:19

I can't question.

SPEAKER_10 14:21

You just acknowledged you wrote it to Sunday.

SPEAKER_03 14:24

I was supposed to be paid for the week. I was at home. So I said the incorrect amount because I didn't know he was gonna pay me for that week.

SPEAKER_10 14:34

Wait, so you spot six thousand dollars instead of two thousand dollars.

SPEAKER_03 14:38

That's my calculations. Let's calculate.

SPEAKER_10 14:42

And what's and so that last week, that was a week you didn't work, right?

SPEAKER_03 14:47

Because I was staying home.

SPEAKER_10 14:48

Right, so you weren't in the kitchen cooking.

SPEAKER_03 14:52

Mr. Diggs sent me home because he had gone to the pizza.

SPEAKER_10 14:55

Whatever you're going to add is not good pizza. Yeah, yes. You understand what question you're being answered? I don't answer her question. Answer true question, right?

SPEAKER_15 15:12

So, uh, this was one of the instances where she claimed she didn't get paid. Um also it was found out that she deleted texts from the thread and she thought that they were gone. Now, see, this shows her ignorance because she doesn't know how the police works, right? No text that you delete is ever really deleted. Let's just put it on the table. They can literally subpoena your phone company and pull up all of the text that you had, and that's what they did. But she didn't think that they had that until they brought she brought that paperwork up there. That's that literally took screenshots of the entire text thread showing that you got paid. So this was one of the many clips, man. It like it was really a circus for real. I can't even believe that they took the case or or went through with the case because it was so many inconsistencies, so much just like, bro, what are we doing? Like, we wasting taxpayers' money at this time. That's why I was over so quick. Right. So it's like, let's call it what it is, right? First off, Stefan Diz is is a wild boy. Because apparently, every woman that he had working for him, he paid for their BBLs. She has a BBL as well. Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. So he knew her prior to, or whatever. They was kind of kicking it, you know, situation and entanglement prior to her working for him.

SPEAKER_16 16:38

What did he know her prior to Cardi? Or was it while they was working?

SPEAKER_15 16:42

I mean, while they were together. That is that is a great question. Okay. To my knowledge, I think he knew her prior to Cardi. Okay. And they had a, you know, a bit of an entanglement back then. You know, she ended up cooking for him after one of those entanglements. He was like, look, you know, you cook pretty well, man. You know, you mind being my chef? She was like, Yeah, I'll do it. You know, whatever, whatever. So they worked out the terms of the agreement and she became the chef. So as this happens, of course he's still beaten the whole time. Um, her um and other chicks as well, you know what I mean? As she stated, like, he sent me home because he had other women coming to the mansion that night, and he knew how I was gonna react. So, whole time he with Cardi. She's a uh willing side piece who also cooks for him. But then when things went left, I think she probably tried to press the issue in terms of like, why you got all these girls, why you doing this, and that's what caused the altercation. You're fired. You're fired. So he he fired her. And then that's when this came about. So, you know, I think it's just it's just very interesting. You know, it's a lot of like my first thoughts is like it it makes me feel bad for the real victims. I done because it's a lot of women out here who really getting hands put on them, who really getting abused, who really in situations that are life-threatening. And for you to be in here playing simply because he didn't choose you, or the relationship with him didn't go how you wanted it to go, wasting taxpayers' money in here lying, it's just like, bruh, like it's spitting in the face of actual victims. And that's what bothers me the most about it. That's my initial thoughts. What you think?

SPEAKER_16 18:40

So the last part. What was the title of the last part? I signed the lease.

SPEAKER_04 18:51

It's up, it's over. We terminate the contract.

SPEAKER_16 18:55

Because you can't abide by the rules. I told you no hookah in the I told you no dog. You went against the gray. At least terminated.

SPEAKER_15 19:09

That's basically what happened here.

SPEAKER_16 19:11

You know what I mean? You're supposed to play a role. Play your role, man. And you want more than that role. Knowing how I am, who I'm with, where I'm going. You supposed to be the cook. Cook and let me beat. When I ask. Simple. That's it, that's all. Simple. But you wanted more. You want to be upgraded. This ain't no upgrade position, baby. Which is not.

SPEAKER_15 19:36

And that's what would be like pissing me off about a lot of women in this position. It's like when you get with somebody and it goes left, they act like they had no prior knowledge of how this man was or who he was and things of that nature. Stefan Diggs is infamous for being a womanizer. It just is what it is, right? So that's why even with the Cardi situation, I was like, yeah, of course he cheated on you a hundred times. Of course he did you like a toy and things of that nature. Like, that's who he is. To the point where they did a poll on the bills.

SPEAKER_16 20:15

When the Interville Locker room said, Who would you least likely want your daughter to date? Stefan was number one. It went viral. It wasn't even close.

SPEAKER_15 20:26

They literally asked like 30 players, and probably 25 of them said Stefan Diggs. This is public. That was a viral video. So it's like we can't act like I had no pro I had no idea he was, he was this way. And it's a lot of women who try to do that, and that's why I say like it made me feel bad for the real victims, the real women who get in their relationships with no prior knowledge and get done wrong, get blindsided, run into some shit that they didn't plan for because they just didn't know he was like that. But when you dating somebody like this, and and I and this this feels a lot like dirty macing, and it's kind of making me feel dirty. And I don't I don't I don't I don't really like that. But it's public. Now I'm not saying that it ain't public, and I'm not putting my opinion in it. So I don't count as dirty macing. But the information is out there. And it's like this is the information area. You can literally go on social media and Google. You know, I I I baby ended up Googling me yesterday. They had a whole profile on me. My age, what type of content I put out, all kind of stuff. What? Literally. He's uh relentless and uh no nonsense and he hails from Houston and first name, last name, he's married, he has a dog. It's just like whoa. So it's like you can get information about people if you really want it. And I wouldn't even consider myself famous. Right. Stefan Diaz is an NFL player, he's famous. Yeah. So it's like we we're not gonna sit here and like if you sign up for bullshit. We can't play victim when it ends in bullshit. And that's what a lot of women do. That's what she's doing. But she's just trying to hit a lick off of it. But in terms of her like being hurt, she's really hurt for real. Like she's really surprised. Like, I I can't believe he's he's a womanizer. He put me out to bring all of these women in. That's what started the argument. It's like, wait, what? So no, man. I can't have no sympathy for that, bro.

SPEAKER_16 22:29

I don't like what I don't like is some women how they'll try to change who a man is or thinking that they can change who a man is. You come into the situation knowing that this man is a woman, I'm sorry. You come into the situation knowing that this man has a whole roster. You come into the situation knowing that this woman, that this man has a wife or girlfriend. This man has a girlfriend. And you think that you can change his mind and that you can be number one or moved up on the totem pole. You just are part of the action. You uh like future say you are part of the collection. That's it, that's all. You will not change his mind. Ladies, you will not change that man's mind. Especially a man like that with that caliber. You gotta think about the mindset too, the psyche. That man feels invincible. That man feels I have so much money, I can get whoever I want, however I want, for however long I want. So you are very replaceable. And that's why it was so quick for him to just let her go. You done. And yes, I'm not paying you because I told you to go home. You're not working. So that's another you're not working. I'm not paying you for services that you're not rendering. Plain and simple. Simple. You trying to get paid off something because y'all had a prior agreement, but cool, but you didn't deliver those services. So no, you don't get you don't deserve to get paid. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_15 23:55

Yep. And like that, even demanding the money is just out of spite. I mean, let's just let's just keep it real here. Like I said, he gave everybody that worked for him BBL. So he's overpaid you, if we're gonna be honest. Because I think you were looking for 6,000. A BBL probably about nine to ten. And don't, don't, don't, don't ask me how I know. But you know, I know a lot of women, man. There's a lot of women that I know that to get that little work done. Um, but yeah, it's about nothing. So he done really overpaid you for real. So we ain't gonna act like these little $4,000 is the reason I'm coming here to sue for five million. We not doing that. You understand? So at the end of the day, the case ended how I was supposed to. Uh, you know, again, man, I I I ain't gonna say salute to Stefan Diggs, but I mean I'm I'm happy that the trial went, I went. Cause this is bullshit. The man is a public self-admitted womanizer.

SPEAKER_16 24:54

They showed him uh checking out when she walked out. You see that? You looking forward as soon as you walk by, nigga said. Like, what you thought? I paid you for that ass right there.

SPEAKER_15 25:07

I say, speaking of losing, man, uh Spirit Airlines, man. 30-something years of service, some of the cheapest flights we ever seen. Before you add bags, seat choice, and things of that nature to it. It's officially out of business. Spirit put out a release basically saying, you know, due to the war in Iran and uh doubling uh fuel prices, they can no longer afford to stay in business. So officially, I think it was May 1st, the doors closed.

SPEAKER_16 25:45

Was there a reason? I didn't get to read all the way into it, but was there a reason why the government bailed on the on the bow they were supposed to give like 500 mil or something like that and ended up descending it?

SPEAKER_15 25:59

Yeah. Yeah, I'm I'm not sure. I don't I don't I don't want to speak ignorantly. I gotta do some research on that. Have you ever flown spirit? No.

SPEAKER_16 26:07

I have. How was it? It wasn't the best experience. No, I have heard great things about it though. Contrary to popular belief, they say like one, not only is it more affordable, but like their experience. Matter of fact, uh, Ocho. Ocho one of the main ones in Little Flat Spirit. You know what I'm saying? Um, but no, I mean, honestly, I I hear a lot of good things about it. They just have a bad rip for some reason.

SPEAKER_07 26:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_16 26:35

They just automatically assume there's the ghetto, you know, and all that stuff. When I think they said they actually didn't have any uh like airplane crashes in the past throughout their whole existence. So that should speak right there. You know, I'm that's that speak volumes. Right. Um but now the one time, the only time I took spirit, this was 2015, 14, something like that. Going to Vegas with the guys, me, Charles, Justo, Donovan. It was for was going to watch the fight. Mayweather and uh what's his name?

SPEAKER_15 27:16

Was it Pacquiao?

SPEAKER_16 27:18

Nah, Pacquiao. We watched that at Grooves. It was what's his name? Uh the big, he kind of Kodo. I want to say Kodo. Gotcha. Something like that. Yeah. And it was for like single de mayo or around single de mayo. Yeah, it was definitely Kodo. Um Mayweather later. So we go out to dog, hilarious. So we, so we um, so I booked it and I'm just, you know, I'm on, I'm on like one of them third party sites. So I'm just trying to, you know, look for something affordable first off. First off. That's the first and last time, nigga. I learned my lessons. Going through the third parties? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not only that, but just not doing my due diligence. Just not doing the I'm I'm not thinking. I'm trying to book the, you know, I'm just I'm being cheap. 37 beat. I'm being cheap. Nigga. We like second to last row.

SPEAKER_19 28:07

My boy, 37 beat.

SPEAKER_16 28:09

And my knees, nigga, was I'm right here uncomfortable as a motherfucker. I'm like, dog, never again. I don't know if it was spirit or it was just that being way in the back. It was uncomfortable as hell.

SPEAKER_15 28:20

My nigga by the bathroom and everything, man. Uncomfortable.

SPEAKER_16 28:23

And then not only that, the room. I know we're gonna.

SPEAKER_15 28:29

Nah, go ahead, Elaborate. We here.

SPEAKER_16 28:31

We here. Nigga. I did that trip all wrong.

SPEAKER_15 28:41

It's smelling like cigarettes.

SPEAKER_16 28:43

What? Floor sticking and shit. And whiskey is gross, nigga. And despair. Four niggas, one roof. Nah nah. Double beds. Double beds to the couch. Double beds in the pull out. Bro, that shit was. Hell no. No, never again. Never again. But that shit was fun. It was a fun trip. But like, I was like, yeah, next time I gotta play it better.

SPEAKER_14 29:10

Niggas gotta I gotta play it better.

SPEAKER_15 29:14

Nigga flew to a 37B, then got off the airplane and went to X Cal.

SPEAKER_16 29:20

And on top of that, we had layovers. Nah, nah, nah. Dead back. Like three three, four hours left.

SPEAKER_15 29:29

When I say cheap. Niggas just stopped in Chicago.

SPEAKER_16 29:33

Nigga, we probably paid like $300 total for the trip. I hope. I hope. That shit was, yeah, never again. But also heard too, like they say spirit charge for everything. They charge for the seat, they charge for the bag, they charge for like everything. You want to move up a little bit, charge. Everything is charged.

SPEAKER_15 29:52

Bruh, Spirit is like, I mean, Frontier is similar. Like it's it's like that's their whole model. It's like low-cost model. Like you, but it's only low cost if you ain't got no, you ain't checking no bag. Cause they charge for carry-on too. So it's like seat choice, they they charging. Check bag, they charging. Uh carry-on, they charging anything snack wise, they charging. Water, they charging. So it's like by the time you done did everything that you would do on a regular flight, you paying the same price as the other flights. Like that's like literally a a I'm just trying to get from point A to point B type situation. I ain't trying to bring that with me. I'm trying to, it's near me in a backpack. You know what I mean? And some flights, they charge you for the personal. For the backpack. So it's like, bruh, I, you know, again, man, salute to spirit. I I mean, I never I never flew on there, but just like you said, the the crash record, though, is admirable. And hopefully a lot of those pilots can get jobs, you know, at other, you know, spots and things of that nature. I think also because they don't have bornes, they have airbuses with spirit, which which they say kind of contributes to that.

SPEAKER_16 31:04

Okay, that makes sense. So I know a few people that that works with spirit, so you know, I hope y'all hope y'all get something. Yeah, that's another point. Yeah, that's a whole nother angle right there, man. No, they have their own school, each one has their own school, so I hope some of it is transferable. But I know they were working on some type of program, but I know it ain't like permanent. Right. Like some of it is temporary.

SPEAKER_15 31:28

So Yeah, and they were saying like everybody who had flights booked out for days after the close, they that you know, they're trying to work with them or whatever. Um the other airlines are trying to work with them, you know, to try to make that right. Because I heard people, man, like, man, I spent a thousand dollars on my ticket. They try to offer me 150. That's like a certificate or something. It's it's like treacherous. There's people who have flights booked out a month in advance. And it's like, nah, that's over. And not only that, we can't give you your money back and you can't sue us for it because we're going bankrupt. So what you gonna do? Like, it's treacherous business going on, man. So prayers, you know, thoughts and prayers, man, to everybody involved in the situation. Uh speaking of crashing and burning, uh. Meg the stallion playtime song. Oh, shit. Um, we here. You know what I mean? Uh Meg came out and basically stated, now we knew nothing about it before Meg came out and put out a statement. Basically, I'ma I'ma summarize it. It was essentially like cheating, having me around your family, and now all of a sudden you don't want to be monogamous. All of a sudden you getting cold feet. I ain't got time to play with you. I was there through all your mood swings and this, that, and the third. And I'm not gonna be played with certain things that I won't tolerate, infidelity, and cheating, and being halfway in, halfway out, and all of these things, and you know it is what it is. Maybe I need to take me a break after this. I can't, I can't do it. That's essentially what the statement says. Um, but a lot of people, you know, of course, are shocked and appalled, and it's a very polarizing topic. Um, you got one side saying, you know, poor Meg, you know, she was doing things the right way. She was trying to be a wife and cooking and cleaning and doing all of these things. And, you know, Klay Thompson, you know, was a womanizer, and you know, he played her and fooled her into the relationship and then broke her heart. And then you got the other side saying, well, Klay Thompson has a history of being a womanizer, and you kind of knew what you were signing up for, and you don't really have the leverage to stand on the integrity mountain that you're trying to stand on in terms of infidelity and cheating and all of these things because of your history of cheating on men, of physically abusing men, lying on men, things of that nature. So you don't really have the leverage to talk like you're talking. And now we got a all our war on social media. So when you heard the news, I'm gonna ask you, were you surprised at the breakup?

SPEAKER_16 34:24

Not one bit. I just wasn't so in in invested to get my opinion on social media like everybody was doing. Um I knew it was only a matter of time. I definitely, like a lot of people, probably felt that Meg was trying to turn a new leaf and date somebody a little bit different. Date somebody that came off as like a good guy, came off as, you know, more clean cut, not rough around the edges, not a quote unquote thug or a rapper or you know, things like that. Is you know, she wanted to step outside and and try to do something right.

SPEAKER_04 35:05

Right.

SPEAKER_16 35:06

But at the same time, still one of the babyface assassins. Right. On and off the court. Legendary Splash Brother. You know what I mean? So I don't know, man. I just I don't know. And now let me remove Meg from the situation. To me, it's hard to be a rapper that raps about certain things, such as using men, taking money from 'em, sleeping with whoever you want. Like it it it's hard being a rapper of that caliber, male or female, rapping about the type of lifestyle, and then also being taken serious in a relationship. Right. Right. So it's also adding to that, especially with the history that you have, along with that, whether that's being physical with somebody, whether that's being promiscuous, like all that stuff, like all that stuff people just think just because you're getting to something new, everything is just being just is just wiped away. There you go. Automatically. Come on. And that's not the case. That stuff follows you. It don't matter how good you are, it don't matter how uh changed you are and and get the growth and things like that. Like, you can grow, you can elevate, you can change, you can become a whole different person. But that past will still be there. And that past will be right there, just waiting on you. You know what I mean? So I wasn't shocked at all. Um I'm not happy they broke up, but at the same time, I'm not like cheering that they broke up either. You know what I mean? I just I was never invested like that. I never thought that they would last in the first place. Um I I can't say that it was a publicity thing. People saying that, you know, Clay was using her to, you know, elevate himself and things like that. Girl, do you know who Clay Thompson is? Like apparently not. The hell? Apparently not. Just because you weren't aware of doesn't mean that man wasn't like internationally known. Like, you know, Meg is kind of more recent, which is what the last say eight years? Right. Something like that.

SPEAKER_15 37:35

Yeah, 2015, 16. Bro' been the league way longer.

SPEAKER_16 37:38

But it's 19, pardon me. 19. Broden what Broden won championships before then, been on Olympic teams. Like, bro, bro's been around for a while. Big name. Been on ESPN, one of the top broadcasting networks in the world. Well, the top broadcasting network in the world. So, yeah, man, I mean, that that man wasn't using her. I definitely think though, um I from my perspective, I think he was trying to give it a try. I don't think he was trying to use her, but I think he was maybe trying to give it a try and then realize that he couldn't just you know be with one woman. You know, he got too many options. Some men aren't ready for that. Some men can't handle it. And especially, you know, she's talking about his move swings and things like that. Like, what if she had some move swings? Knowing her history. Like, what if he was dealing with some things and he was like, man, I don't know if I can take that. You know what I mean? So I mean, you know, but she came out first. So of course, that's gonna be the story, that's gonna be the lead, that's gonna be what's believable, and that's what people are gonna run with. But bro ain't said a word. Went out on his boat and do what he always does enjoying himself. Ain't ain't addressed in one bit. So um, yeah, man, like you say, prayers to all parties involved. Um, you know, it is what it is. Thoughts and prayers, man.

SPEAKER_15 39:04

Um, yeah, surprise, no. I wasn't surprised at all. I think, you know, again, we just got done talking about it. People's history and who they are is very researchable. Clay has always been known as a guy who and and this is another thing. This whole narrative of he's this nerd and quote unquote good guy and all of these things, it just shows people's ignorance. Because he's light skinned, he could and and it's like he's not a lot of his business, quote unquote, is not in the media per se, like a Stefan Diggs. But Klay Thompson is Michael Thompson's son. I don't know if y'all are familiar with Michael Thompson, legendary Laker, all of these things. He's been rich his whole life. Good-looking guy, light skin, curly hair, you know, all of these things, one of the greatest shooters to ever play the game, legendary, co-splash brother, all of these things, champion, four-time champion, hall of fame basketball player. There is no nerd or good guy, you know, just automatic assumption about that. If you put anybody else, if I described anybody else like that, you would say, oh yeah, that boy be on the hose. It just is what it is. And Klay Thompson has a history of being on a lot of women. That's who he, that's who he is, right? You've never really seen him in a serious relationship or things of that nature. You've seen him be in situationships, maybe dating somebody temporarily, you know, they get some pictures together, this and third. But it's also pictures of him out there on his yacht with three, four women around him, sipping on beers and with his uh captain hat on. So again, we're not gonna paint this narrative as like, oh, he's just a good guy and trying to. No. And the information is out there, and that's what that's what bothers me about a lot of women. Because when their relationship was good, it was ah, he's a real man and he's he's doing this and he's doing that, and da-da-da-da-da. No, Klay had a situation to where this is one of the hottest rappers in the game. She's an attractive woman. We are we are enjoying ourselves. We having a lot of sex, we're going on dates, we're doing this, we're making public appearances together. This is fun. But in terms of him needing her for his relevance, it's just outright ridiculous. And I think it shows the like ignorance of people. It's like this man does not need any more recognition than he already has. Don't get me wrong, like a relationship definitely elevates your profile to it to an extent. But Klay don't care about being like super famous. Again, but that goes back to so they don't know much about Klay. He never cared about that type of thing. So this is a fun, oh, I get to I get to hit this rapper, basically, for a little while. Oh, he he bought her gifts and he bought her this and he bought her that. Clay Thompson is worth what $500 million.

SPEAKER_16 42:11

That's nothing. It's a drop in the bucket.

SPEAKER_15 42:14

Buying a bag or buying a car is absolutely nothing to him.

SPEAKER_16 42:18

Oh, yeah. It wasn't too something about uh the allowance. He was given the allowance and then he said he was gonna cut it down, and they kind of got into it over. That's what I heard. I don't know how true that is.

SPEAKER_15 42:28

Why would she need an allowance if her net worth is $100 million? Why would she need that?

SPEAKER_16 42:33

It was alleged rumors.

SPEAKER_15 42:34

You know what I mean? But but it's like if you just get to looking at the whole situation as a whole, it's just like, bro, this was two people that was that was having fun. It's two people that probably didn't expect to even cross paths with each other. We done linked up at a at a party or something. I'm sipping, you sipping, we having a good time. Because Meg has a history of sipping. Too much, uh, some people may say. But, you know, that's neither here nor there. But we ended up having fun, enjoying ourselves. Boom, we done had some sex. You know what? I like being around you. I like talking to you. Boom, let's, hey man, what you doing tomorrow? Let's kick it tomorrow. Let's do this, let's do that. Next thing you know, you're stringing days together, weeks together, you're having a good time. You understand what I'm saying? And both people are benefiting from this relationship, not just Klay. Right. Because now Meg gets to rebrand. She gets to change her image because her image prior to Klay was an alcoholic that was out here traumatized from her from you know her parents and things of that nature, and drunk everywhere, stumbling, messing with this rapper, messing with this singer, messing with this person, messing with that person. That was her reputation. And on top of that, the Tory, the whole Tory Lane situation. So it was just a bunch of dysfunction. That's what her reputation was. But now I get to clean it up in this relationship. I'm cooking, I'm cleaning. I'm, you know, I'm taking care of my man. I'm this, them, that. So both sides benefited from it. We ain't gonna act like Clay benefited solely. Right. But it's like this. Situation ran its course. Yeah. And I think she wanted more. And he was like, nah, I don't want to be in no serious relationship with you. This was fun. You know what I mean? And in terms of the whole meaning the parents thing.

SPEAKER_16 44:13

Or I was going to get into that. Go ahead, bro. That means nothing. I just want to let y'all know that right now. This is not the 1700s. This ain't nothing special. You meet the parents because it's a holiday. It's Memorial Day. It's Labor Day. And we kicking it. And we heavy. Right. And I don't want to leave you out. Because it would look away if I just left you at home while I kicked it with my family. 100%. We rock, we rock with each other enough for me to bring you around the family. That don't mean nothing special like that like it used to. So I want y'all to understand that now. Plain and simple. It means Nathaniel.

SPEAKER_15 44:55

I agree. I agree. So, so that's what I think happened. I think the situation just ran it course, ran its course. I think she wanted more, and he had got kind of bored with the situation. And was like, look, I don't want to be monogamous no more. I don't want to move into a marriage or something like that. This is fun. I just want to have fun. We could be together. We can be together. But I'm going to need you know? I'm going to need to have my fun. I'm going to let some on the side. And she wasn't going for that. Again, which is which is respectable. I don't hell nah. I ain't if that ain't what I'm with, I ain't signing up for that. You understand? But again, I think it's ways to handle things as well. Like, why are you first thing you do is go to TMZ with a statement. Nobody knew that y'all broke up. Like, why is that? Why am I making putting my business out there? And then when people react to the business, why y'all all in a relationship? We would have never been in a relationship if she didn't go to TMZ and announce the end of the relationship and then announce details within the relationship. Come on now. Seems like a bigger player then. It's mood swings and this, that, and the third. So again, that speaks to why a lot of men don't feel comfortable being vulnerable with women. This is a perfect example of that. Because now you put my mood swings and my mental issues in the public light. But if he did that, he would get killed for that. Oh man, she's drinking every night. She traumatized and all this, that, and the third. I ain't got time. Oh my God, this fun. Oh, this, that. Could you imagine if he came out with a with a statement to TMZ talking about the the issues he had to deal with with her?

SPEAKER_16 46:24

Yes, I can. And it wouldn't go in his favor. Come on, man. It's gonna be what did he do? Come on, bro. Every single time. He could have said she put her hands on me. Well, why did you what made her put her hands on you? What did you do? I'm telling you, that's a fact. I would have win. That's a fact. Unfortunately.

SPEAKER_15 46:40

So, you know, again, man, it but going back to what you said, I just I just didn't really care that much. You know what I mean? Which brings me to my next clip. Kev on Stage is uh, you know, comedian, made his fame on Instagram, things of that nature. Uh kind of leans into the church religious genre. He spoke on the situation and said that a man's reaction to Meg the Stallion is a litmus test for a woman. I'm gonna play the clip, man. We're gonna get your take on it.

SPEAKER_13 47:16

How you feel about Megan the Stallion overall, from everything in her life, is a good litmus test for how you think about relationships.

SPEAKER_12 47:25

How you think about women.

SPEAKER_13 47:26

How you think how you think about women? Starting with women. How you think about so many things. You wanna date a nigga? First thing, before they bring the bread. Tell me what you think about Megan the Stallion. From Tory Lanez to Klay Thompson. Guarantee that's gonna tell you what kind of man you're dealing with. It's a great dating question now. What are your thoughts on? I guarantee you, however you see the world, you gonna find out whether they agree. And I'm not gonna say one way or the other. But I guarantee you they gonna, you're gonna find out whether you agree. It might be as polarizing who you vote for president. How do you think about women in relationships as how you think about Megan the Stallion as a person? Guarantee you, one-to-one, it's gonna tell you everything you need to know about that man or the woman. Because it's not only men. There's women in there.

SPEAKER_12 48:09

Oh, I see a I've seen the women talk about free Tory. Girl, go to go to hell. Go to hell with his hairline.

SPEAKER_15 48:18

How a man feels about Meg the Stallion is a great judge of who that man is and what his character is as a man. Come on, kid. What's your thoughts on that, man?

SPEAKER_16 48:31

Come on, kid. Right is right, wrong is wrong. Plain and simple. Plain and simple. I deal with facts, I deal with details, and there are a lot of sketchy things on the other side. Nothing is concrete. Do I love all women and do I want to protect all women? Absolutely. But if somebody is full of shit, I'm gonna point it out. If I don't agree, I'm gonna say it. I'm not one of them guys that's just gonna ride all the way with guys just because he's a god. No. But I'm also not gonna just take a woman's side just because, you know, she's saying something. Me and my cousin got into it over the whole make the stallion thing. Like a like got into it, into it. And all I was simply was saying was, we don't know all the facts. We got into it like when it was early. And I kept saying, man, this is what I believe. I believe this happened, this happened. And a lot of the story that came out is added up. It was a lot of back and forth. And I'm like, you know, we end up letting it go. But man, I disagree 100% with Kev. I love Kev, love everything he does, very inspiring. Um, shit, I would like to copy some of the blueprint with how he, you know, how much he posts and things like that. But as far as that take, I strongly disagree.

SPEAKER_15 49:55

Yeah, I think Kev done lost his goddamn mind. I strongly disagree. I mean, I'm gonna just I'm I'm just keeping honest. But I think also it speaks to the climate of this situation. It literally pits men and women against each other. And if you question her validity or if you question her integrity in any way, even though she's a self-admitted liar and things of that nature, if you factor that in or if you point to that, then you're being insensitive to black women or you hate all black women. That's how this thing has has kind of divided and been polarizing within our community. So that's why I don't even like touching it. Yeah, because it's like, bruh, like just like you're saying, we don't know these people, bro. All we got to go on is what's being presented to us. And what's being presented to us about her is that, yeah, she is traumatized. She is a troubled soul. She has been through a lot. It is what it is. But also, she's on record for lying a lot. You understand? And it's like we can't, I'm somebody that's that's a known, admitted liar, for somebody to question their integrity, is not wrong. It's not a judge of character. It's just me being analytical and analyzing the whole situation in an unbiased fashion. That's it. I don't, I don't, I don't have a dog in the fight. I I I don't care for real. If a woman asked me that on a first date, that would be our last date. Facts. I'm a grown-ass man. I don't have time to be sitting here talking to you about Megasta and all of these things. I don't care. So for you to say that that's a litmus test for the integrity of a man, it just shows that he's caving to this pressure that's out here to pick a side and stand on the stand on the right side of history and all of this shit. It's like, bro, drop your nut. Be a man, bro. Men are analytical. Men analyze the whole situation in an unbiased fashion. We lit we are fact-based. We are a fact-based gender. Women are emotion-based gender. It is what it is. That's why I can't even blame the women who support Meg. It is what it is because they see a lot of themselves in her. And because of that, damn what the facts say. I'm gonna ride with it. That's how women are. And I get it. I don't judge them for that. But it's like expecting men to move like women just so you can keep yourself in a good light for the media and the public is just ridiculous to me. If you want to do that, that's fine. Do your thing. But to crucify men for being like, hold on, let's analyze all the facts. This shit ain't really adding up. And for it to say to say that he hates women or he feels a way about black women as a result of that, is outright fucking ridiculous, bro.

unknown 52:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_15 52:48

So, yeah, that's just my take, man. Thoughts and prayers. Um God, we're gonna go and keep it pushing. We got some clips today, man. Let's get in the study hall. Um, my boy O got a clip, man. Good love brings out everything you haven't dealt with yet. That is a powerful title. We're gonna play the clip, man, and get into a detailed breakdown of what they're talking about.

SPEAKER_01 53:19

You know what no one tells you? The healthiest relationships will trigger you the most. Not because they're toxic, but because they're safe enough to show you what's still unhealed. And that's where the real growth begins. Like you finally meet someone good, someone patient, someone who doesn't yell, doesn't run, doesn't make you feel crazy. And instead of feeling peaceful right away, you start freaking out a little bit. You're waiting for them to leave. You're overthinking every text, you're pushing them away for no reason, and you're sitting there like, why am I like this? Friend, that's not you being broken. That's that's old stuff coming up because it finally feels safe enough to come up. In the toxic relationship, you are so busy surviving that you never even had time to heal. But now someone is actually showing up for you, and your nervous system doesn't even know what to do with that yet. So it panics, and that's normal, that's part of the process. The goal isn't to find someone who never triggers you, the goal is to find someone safe enough to do the work with. Give yourself grace while you figure it out. Because this is actually healing, you know.

SPEAKER_15 54:49

Man, the healthiest relationship, man. Will trigger you the most.

SPEAKER_16 54:54

Man. I feel like we've touched on this topic numerous times. But I've never heard it this way. Like she painted that picture perfect. Like everything, at least everything that I've tried to say, everything that I've tried to convey and get across, like she painted that picture perfectly. And I couldn't agree more. Because again, like she said, it's like a shock to the nervous system. I'm used to doing things one way, and it's out of survival. So when I get here and you're treating me the way I should be treated, I don't know how to act. Because I'm ready to fight. I'm ready to put my hands on your, I'm ready to curse you out. So in this moment, I tell you how I feel, and you don't get upset with me. I tell you how I feel and you don't curse me out. I'm telling you things that you know I see that you may have a deficiency in and you don't get mad, you taking notes and you saying, okay, baby, I hear you and I want to work this out. How can I get better for you? Like that is a shock to a lot of people, and they're not used to that. So I couldn't agree more with that clip, man. Like I've that like it hit home. Because like I said before, I've dealt with that so many times in in just different situations, and it's just mind-boggling sometimes because it's like I'm on the up, I'm on the opposite end. So I'm used to being things calm and you know, being able to have a conversation with somebody and talk things out. So when it's the when it was the other way, that one it was more of a shock because I'm like, okay, yeah, being super combative and you trying to fight and put hands on, I'm not used to that shit. That's that's not me. But yeah, man, she a thousand percent I agree with what she was saying.

SPEAKER_15 56:52

Yeah, I mean, um, yeah, I mean, I I agree for the most part, except for when she said that that proves that you're not broken. In my opinion, I think it holds a mirror up to the fact that you are broken. Um and again, yeah, for sure, for sure. You know, that's not your fault, per se. Um, but we're running into somebody who actually healed is is it holds a mirror up to everything that you need to work on. To whereas when you dating somebody who is broken as well, if you're a little more advanced than them, in your mind you feeling like, well, I don't, it's not my fault. I don't have nothing anymore. It's you. Because you cause more problems than I do. So the problems that I do cause, I can just put them to the back burner. They become less relevant because you're more dysfunctional than I am. But when you run into somebody who's healed, all your dysfunctions and stuff come to the surface. Going back to what she said, it's like, damn, I'm I'm expressing things and you're not weaponizing them. Or I'm saying things, you know, and you're not taking them personal, or you're not feeling away. Yeah, that's because that person done done did the work. I'm able to compartmentalize situations. I'm able to understand the perspective that it's coming from. I'm able to understand who's saying it to me and what they mean to me and what I mean to them. So I can receive it different. That's what healed looks like. But when you're not healed, everything is a fight. Everything is defensive. Everything that I don't like is you challenging my, like not only how I'm moving, but my entire identity as a person. And that is the definition of being broken. You are broken. And at the end of the day, the only way you can get through that is self-work. And and I'm gonna go out on the limb as well. It's not that healed person's responsibility to get you to their level. It's not. I agree. As a matter of fact, you're doing a disservice to them by not doing the personal work on your own. To be the person or the best version of yourselves for this person who's actually healed and who's actually willing to pour into you. But a lot of people don't do that. They just jump from dysfunction into another situation and hope that this person can take me as I am and help me get there and things of that nature. And don't get me wrong, it's benevolent if they're willing to do that. But that's not their responsibility. But unfortunately, a lot of times that's put on their shoulders. But yeah, like running into somebody healthy when you're broken, yeah, is it's jarring. It's sobering. It's like, damn, hold on. I didn't realize all this was wrong with me because I've been dealing with people who are beneath me for most of my life. So yeah, you know that that's how it goes. So I I just I just want people out there listening, bro. Like, don't bleed on somebody who didn't cut you. That's it. It's nothing wrong with elevating, it's nothing wrong with getting with somebody who you aspire to deserve. But if you walk into that relationship broken, you don't deserve them. You don't. If you ain't done no personal work, if you ain't healing, if you ain't in therapy, if you ain't reading no book, you ain't really working on yourself, you don't deserve somebody healed. And that's another thing. That mirror that's held up to you, it showed you that you and that dysfunctional person was perfect for each other. You was just as dysfunctional as they was. Because if you wasn't, you would have never been with them. Your requirements would have been different, your boundaries would have been firmer, but they wasn't. So why? Because y'all wasn't too far from each other, and that's what being with somebody here shows you. And it's like, bro, you gotta be a grown ass person and very humble and very like, oh, I got a lot to work on.

SPEAKER_16 1:00:44

So, yeah, that's my take on it, man. But and don't question it either. You know, some people they'll get in a situation and be like, So you're not mad? So you're not gonna cuss me out? You're not gonna No. You ain't gotta question it. No, accept that person for who they are. They are not what you're used to. So you ain't gotta even question that. Take it for what it is. I see that far too often. You'll get in a situation, you know, somebody getting into it, or you know, somebody just disagree and they super calm the whole time, having a discussion with you. You trying to get elevated and hey, hey, hey, hey. Hey, baby, I love you, I care about you. And this is what I'm saying. When I'm saying this, we don't agree, which is cool. And I understand your perspective, but this is all I'm saying. And it's like they used to, you know, jumping across the table and get in each other's face and pointing and touching and you know, all that stuff. So when you get somebody who is the complete opposite, man, it just it really wakes you up. And I think that if anything, that should make you sit back and reflect and want to do the self-work. That's it. Or just understand like where that comes from. You know what I mean? Is it like because it starts early. So was it something that you saw in the house? Was it something that you just decided you just deal with just because you felt like a lot of men were like that or something? Like, you gotta go back to the beginning and try to find out the source of it.

SPEAKER_15 1:02:16

Bro, the thing is, some people been in dysfunction so long that they feel like this is normal. Yeah. They've been in dysfunction for so long. I'm talking about from childhood, dysfunction, people I'm dating, dysfunction, abuse, loud talk, hands and faces, physical fighting, police involved, domestic charges, all of these things. They've been in dysfunction so long that they feel like this is normal. And they run into somebody who's solid and wait, this is uncomfortable for me. So I'ma self-sabotage it. And it's like, no, you deserve better as long as you're working on yourself to deserve it. That's the thing. It's like sometimes you may meet somebody and they are at a more evolved level than you are. That should inspire you to be like, you know what? I need to really do some like self-inventory and figure out what my weaknesses is, what my challenges is, and really work on that. You understand? Before I even embark on a situation with this person. Because if I just jump in it, I'm not ready for that. And sometimes a lot of us, regardless of how much we don't want to admit it, we not ready for a good person. We not. We are not ready for a healed person. We are broken, we are in shambles. But we just make it look good. You know what I mean? We we we can go through life and kind of hide it. We can kind of mask it. We can kind of just be functional. You know what I mean? Like growing up, growing up in the hood. Like, you know, it was a lot of people who was doing drugs, but they was functional. Right, right. Going to work every day, but when they come home, they get high. When they come home, they get drunk. They functional. But that don't mean that they are the best version of themselves. They broken on the inside. Right. And it's a lot of people that are in relationships right just like that. Like I'm functional within a relationship. Right. But the first test or the first hurdle or the first whatever, I'm going to resort to what's familiar with me. Yeah. And that's me going into defense mode. That's me holding up my shield. That's me trying to attack you. Or that's me because I got abandonment issues. I'm leaving you before you leave me because I don't want to feel that hurt that I felt when my parents left me when I was younger, or when my sister left or passed away when I was younger, or whatever the case may be. And it's like, you ain't sorted that out yet. So because of that, you don't deserve a good person right now. You need to be working on you. Forget everybody else. Yep. But it's a lot of people who don't do that and they just jump into a relationship, and now you're ruining a good person. Bleeding on them when they didn't cut you. So when they leave that situation, now they got trauma. Now they second guessing shit.

SPEAKER_16 1:05:01

Yep. And one more thing, just to add to what you're already talking about, like too. Especially, for example, if you see that in your household growing up, and your people are still together. You know what I mean? They like, shit, my parents have been together 30, 40 years. I seen it all my childhood. Right. And they still together. So it looks completely normal for them to act out, curse them out, all that stuff. Because shit my parents did it, they worked out, they turned out just fine. But that shit, it ain't gotta be that way. They was learning and they was young just like you are. You can you can turn that around. You don't have to be like they were.

SPEAKER_15 1:05:45

Tenure. Tenure is not as important as the quality of the relationship, bro. Come on, no. Don't talk to me about no 40 year marriage when your parents don't speak to each other. Come on, no. Don't talk to me about no 40 year marriage when your parents sleep in separate rooms. Don't talk to me about no. What's the quality of the 40? And that's what's not spoken about enough. Just because people are together when they're older, it don't mean that that's a quality relationship. Come on now. They fell out of love. They've been together 40 years. They fell out of love 30 years ago. But they were scared to leave. Or they stayed for the kids, quote unquote. But now you hold this up as if this is something to replicate. No, don't talk to me about 40. Talk to me about the quality of the relationship. Do they act, do they even like each other? Damn love each other. And a lot of people that are in long-term relationships who can't stand each other. But we done been together so long that I don't know nothing else. And I don't have the confidence to start over at 60 or 50. So we just gonna rock out.

SPEAKER_16 1:06:48

I'll take that quality 10 over a miserable 40, 50, 100. 100%. Any day.

SPEAKER_15 1:06:54

100%. Quality 10 and me being by myself. But a lot of people back then didn't have the option to be by themselves. A lot of women back then wasn't able to work, wasn't able to have bank accounts, wasn't able to buy houses, things of that nature. These was these was real laws, in effect. You understand? So it's like for people to hold that up. Nah, don't talk to me about how long they've been together. Talk to me about the quality of the relationship. Do they still hold hands when they outside? Do they still go on dates? Do they still be Lubby Dubby? Talk to me about that. I don't want to hear about how long they've been together. The quality of the relationship is way more important than the tenure. And that's just reality, bro. So all right, what we got next, man? Uh, Stephen A was on Cam Newton Podcast. He was talking about women expecting men to spend money early, will not get far. I'm gonna play the clip, get your take on it.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:51

The mistake a woman would make, to use the example that you use with the girl that you mentioned. Appreciation can never turn into expectation. With me, your days are numbered. Appreciation must never turn into expectation. It's mine to give, not yours to take. The minute you think you entitled, you ain't getting shit. Because you think you entitled. I don't like that. I want you to to appreciate. You don't have to give what I give in terms of that level. But what you do have to do is show an appreciation that I'm extending myself to give more than I had to.

SPEAKER_15 1:08:42

Look here, expectation. Don't expect this paper just because I got it. Come on, man. Don't feel entitled to this money that you did not work for simply because you're a woman and I'm a man. That right there will get you X'ed out. Oh, what's your thoughts on that, man?

SPEAKER_16 1:08:59

Very quickly, with a quickness. With a quickness. And I ain't nowhere near Stephen A. Devil. But I've always had that that type of mentality because. What are we here for? Are we here to learn and grow from each other? Are we are we or are we just here for an experience? If we just here for an experience, let's let's uh let's write up some type of contract. You know what I mean? I do my one-two, you do your one-two, and we up out of here. But, you know, of course, they don't they don't want that. They don't want that presented that way. But that's how a lot of y'all move. Like Illisei. Famous quote, when y'all standing next to the hose, standing too close to the hose. I'm a dog, man. Y'all want y'all want so many things, man, that's just unrealistic. Like you want a real relationship, but operated from like a fantasy or just just fabricated. And that's not the case. Matter of fact, I hope I don't get killed for this. Matter of fact, it's very similar to you putting makeup on, you putting lashes on, you putting a wig on, all these different things to not be who you are, to dress it up, instead of just you know, not or not not doing as much because some of y'all, not all of y'all, some of y'all look completely different when y'all put everything on.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:34

Right.

SPEAKER_16 1:10:35

So it's it's it's it's very similar whenever we come into this relationship. You wanting a facade, but want me to be genuine. And that's that's not how we operate. Like, what are we here for? Am I here to get to know you or are we just here for a good time?

SPEAKER_04 1:10:56

Right.

SPEAKER_16 1:10:57

You gotta pick. Because a lot of men understand and they know most men, understand and they know when you come in, like first date, for example. First date, unless we've been rocking and knowing each other for a long, long time, we just met, and we talking about just average dudes, just slightly above average, we shouldn't be like going over $500 a date. I don't know you. You don't know me. Why am I using my resources for you just to have a good time for one night? Like if you don't want to deal with me, cool. We can do something simple. If you just want to get to know me, but you want to pick uh a restaurant that you haven't been to before just to try it out. And then you go with the next man, then you go with the next man, then the next man, then the next man. Are you really trying to date or are you just trying to go for free meals? Or are you trying to post these things on Instagram? Like it makes you question a lot of things that some of these women be doing. Again, it's not all women, I understand that. But that that really brings it into question because a woman is down. I don't know if you saw that uh was that Amber Rose clip. Amber Rose was like, shit, if I'm good for Cheesecake Factory, bitch, you are too. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you gotta be, you gotta be able to humble yourself, man. Like, we trying to get to know each other. And if it was flipped, I know it's hard to put yourself in that position, but if it was flipped and a man wanna go to a steakhouse and then he ordered the most expensive thing on the menu, give me the wagyu. Give me the give me the 10-ounce, 14-ounce wagu. Ain't never had wagyu in my life. But then you want to order something like that, and you want to order several drinks, and you want to order the crab cakes, and you want to order dessert, and you want to order three sides. It's like, do you know how to conduct yourself? Would you pay for this? You know what I mean? So that that that makes you question a lot of things, a lot of motives. And like Stephen A said, yeah, you you gone. Like it you won't last long at all. Like, men look for authenticity and women that are genuine. That's what we look for off the rip. And a man who is confident in himself and who is genuine himself can sense that a mile away. You're not about to play with a man like that. Because he's gonna let you know what it is and what it ain't. And you either rolling with the program or you're not. And don't get mad when after the first date it's over. It just is what it is. I sense who you are. I got the feeling for who you are. You had a terrible conversation. You don't know how to have conversations. The whole conversation, if we did have it, was about you. You weren't trying to get to know me and for for who I am or nothing like that. It was all superficial. So I'm out. There's nothing else to talk about because I see it. There's is this is not gonna go anywhere. So I mean, yeah, I'm I'm around with Stephen A thousand percent.

SPEAKER_15 1:14:00

Yeah, I don't I don't disagree with nothing he said. I think that a lot of women just don't have finesse today. They come in demanding money right out the gate or like very, very early, and it's like not realizing men will do anything for a woman. As long as he don't feel like he's getting played. That's it. It's just as simple as that, you understand? But when you jump out the window and ask for money and things of that nature that early, it's just like, bro, what, wait, hold on. I was gonna do stuff for you just on my own, like stuff that you didn't even have to ask for because I rock with you like that. But now I feel like this is transactional, which is cool. But it's like, it's like that need to be announced from the door so I can know what I'm getting into. You understand what I'm saying? But a lot of women don't do that. They try to portray the image like they really like you, and then they really want your money, or they really just want the clout of being with you. You understand? And then when that comes out and dude, you know, crash out or he ain't going, nah, he's getting criticized for that. But in terms of what Stephen A saying, it's 100% true. It's a lot of women that come to a relationship or a situation, whatever, dealing with a man who has money with the expectation of he's just supposed to give her money simply because you're a woman and you're attractive. Mm-hmm. And that's baffling to me. Because it's like he's attractive and he has money. That means that he can get a lot of women who look like you or better.

SPEAKER_16 1:15:32

Come on now.

SPEAKER_15 1:15:33

So it's like, why would I pay you to do anything when I can replace you with somebody tomorrow? Multiple. You understand? So it's yeah. So I think it's just a lot of women that just don't have finesse. I think back in the day, more women had finesse. They use their femininity to get what they wanted to get out of a man. They never had to ask him directly. You understand? So it's just like, and there's certain men who just not going, bro. Everybody ain't going. But I think that brings me to another point. I think there's a lot of men out there who are going. Yep. And they're messing the game up. Yeah. Because for every man who would laugh in a woman's face that asked him for money, it's 10 men who would be like, okay, here you go. Yeah. Because you got women out here saying, I never met this man before in my life. He sent me $2,000 or never had sex with him before ever. He's paying my rent or he bought me a car or he bought me an apartment or whatever. And it's like, because there's so many men out there like that, women go to every man who has money with an expectation. You understand? It's just like, bro, every man that ain't going, any man that's solid or confident in who he is, they just gonna laugh at you. I remember the first time a woman asked me for money, I laughed her off the phone. And I and I and I would say her name, but you know, she got close ties to the family and things of that nature, so I don't want to. But she literally was like, Yeah, you know, man, my you know, my like light bill coming up, you know, I'm a little short, I don't know what I'm gonna do. And uh bye. And I'm just a woman I never had sex with in my life, never hit, never did nothing with. But she just was cool with I I ain't gonna say too much. But I was like, bruh, I what you telling me that for? Like, like, like, like, what's the goal here? She was like, You ain't gonna help me out, you ain't gonna, no. What what are you talking about? And I started laughing. She got mad, I started laughing. He was like, okay, well, you clearly ain't mature enough to have this conversation. So I just kept laughing. The more she said it, it just got funnier and funnier because you think I'm a nigga who would pay you to do anything. Do I look? You know what? I'm not gonna be arrogant and cocky today. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not the kind of guy who would pay a woman to do anything. If I don't like you like that, or whatever, now once you my girl or you my wife or whatever the case, you can have whatever you want. But if we just kicking it and vibing and you expect to get paid basically, baby, you are sad. I'm not him. You understand? And again, salute to the dudes who do that. I'm not gonna knock that. Because every dude gotta get it how he live. But I'm just not that guy. Yeah. So, yeah, what Stephen A. Say is 100% right. It's a whole bunch of entitlement that just shouldn't be there. I think that men can spot that quickly. Like a lot of women be feeling like they're running game. A lot of women don't have game. They just attractive. And because they're attractive, men just roll up, roll out the red carpet, pull out the water immediately. Things are that, hey, but what you need? I can. But when you run into certain men, attractive women are not that special, not that rare to certain men.

SPEAKER_16 1:18:52

I've never had to pay to play. Ever. Ever. If I rock with you, I rock with you. If I chose to take you out somewhere nice, that was on me. And it was probably somewhere that I frequent. There you go. Or like going to. So it's some, you know, I know the bartender, it's it's gonna be some type of, you know, situation where I'm already comfortable in. So you're not about to pull the wool over my eyes. No, it just mm-mm. No. Like I said, tacos. So we're going to the tacos. I got a dope ass taco truck, I do about we're gonna have a good time, we're gonna vibe about it, I'm gonna make it laugh, we're gonna kick it, we're gonna have a good time. Like, depending on, you know, who they are, we're gonna shit go to the park, we can go kayak, we can, you know what I'm saying? It's gonna be a great time. You ain't about to just be pulling money out of me. No, no way. Unless you my woman. That's the only person that gets that gets their wallet open like that is my woman.

SPEAKER_15 1:19:51

She can have what she wants. Like, spare no expense. So. But it's like, we ain't even I don't know you.

SPEAKER_16 1:20:02

Women already don't buy men gifts or do anything for them. So what?

SPEAKER_15 1:20:07

That's why I say all the time, bro. Like, I couldn't be single in this era. I'd be treacherous, bro. Like, I'd be so hard on women that it would be ridiculous. Like in terms of my requirements, my boundaries, and things like that. Like, I would be like, it would be non-negotiable. It would be titanium firmness on things. You can either do this or you will get replaced. It's as simple as that. And I think if more men move like that, then these expectations wouldn't be what they are. But I think a lot of men, when attractive women walk in the room, they just get like they like take turning the goofies. Like I done seen it with my eyes, and this is men who have money. So where it's like certain women will come and man, she's so, she's so bad. I just want to give her whatever I did. I'm looking like, bro, like what the f. But like I say, I can't blame the women for having them expectations because the same way we hear ridiculing it, it's dudes who would do it in a heartbeat. Never met her, never had sex with, never been on a date with her. Hey, here go a thousand dollars, baby. Buy you something nice. So it's like, and it ain't even a fact of having the money. I can send you what, but I'm not doing that. Because once you set that precedent, that's who you are to a woman.

SPEAKER_16 1:21:26

But at the same time, too, to each his own, though. You know what I mean? Some women carry that type of weight around. And if you deal with that type of woman, that's what you that's a non-negotiable. True. So you either play in that ball field or you don't. True. The problem is women be trying to play in that ball field that they don't belong there. That'd be the issue.

SPEAKER_15 1:21:52

Threes out here acting like nines.

SPEAKER_16 1:21:54

That'd be the that'd be the issue. Gotcha. One nigga done it.

SPEAKER_15 1:21:57

Now you think every nigga needed to do you think that's protocol, not forward.

SPEAKER_16 1:22:01

No. Not at all. Because like we talked about uh one time, what was that uh did we talk about that? I don't think we did, but Bernice. But she was like, she expects a certain amount before.

SPEAKER_15 1:22:15

Oh no, you're talking about uh whatchamacallit, you talking about uh uh Aisha Diaz. She was talking about $50,000 to if a man want to date me, that's my expenses.

SPEAKER_16 1:22:26

Yeah, yeah. But at the same time, even with her, that's if you're not trying to make her work. Because she works and she got expenses to take care of. So if you want to date her and if you want her to be around you and don't want her to work, she got a price. Right. Reasonably so. And if you ain't in that ballpark, you just not in that ballpark, baby. But hey, but again, a lot of women, that's a point zero zero zero zero. Oh god. So, yeah, man, girl, you better take these chilies and move on. It's triple dipper.

SPEAKER_15 1:23:03

The triple dipper.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:07

Take this triple dipper, girl.

SPEAKER_15 1:23:08

The triple dipper. That's hilarious. Uh, that might be the title of the spot. Um, all right, we're gonna move on to another one, man. Charleston White was recently having a conversation with some fellas, man. Uh, podcast. I ain't damn, I can't think of the name of it, but y'all gonna y'all gonna see it if y'all watching. So salute to them boys, man. This was a hell of a conversation. I'm gonna play a clip from it and uh and we're gonna break it down.

SPEAKER_17 1:23:36

Nigga, I don't trust you. So, what you think we need to do as a community to change that? Uh, you need to go back and apologize to every woman you think you have hurt, whether you think you've done it or not. Apologize. That's why we can't get ahead, nigga. You do I'm gonna say this. I'm gonna say while I say this. I got I got two kids. I got no kids. I got two kids by one woman whom I was married to and ain't gonna bounce the baby. So so go so come apologize. No screen, and I don't want to sell the stuff I'm pretty nigga, I'm no plenty got there. But what are your mores like? Do your children hey, pop it, do they pray like do they serve your god? You fighting as a father, nigga, nigga's a brother, and if your children don't serve your girl, nigga, my son have never been arrested. My daughter, my daughter's nigga. This is not a competition, this is not a competition, nigga.

SPEAKER_11 1:24:40

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_17 1:24:45

Have you ever been to jail on your children? Say it one more time. Have you ever been to jail on your children? I have, yeah. I haven't.

SPEAKER_18 1:24:52

Hell no, I haven't. I never.

SPEAKER_17 1:24:56

This is not a competition. I'm just asking questions because I'm a day one father. I I didn't make bastard babies, for one. That's a curse that you put upon your children that the white man has nothing to do with. You curse your children, having children out of wetlock. So I'm gonna say this. I'm a day one daddy. My children don't know what it's like not to be in the house with their father. They was raised by me, live with me. If you ain't done that, my nigga, it's hard to talk to you brothers because you're getting offensive about what I'm saying rather than receiving. Not with me because I know. It ain't about what it ain't about what you speak up. It ain't about what you because you still looking in the past. You just say, I can't, I'm not gonna be. Some niggas it ain't about the bitch. It's about what you done done wrong to the bitch. The bitch didn't do wrong to you first. How you know? You showed up fucked up. You showed up fucked up based off what you just said.

SPEAKER_18 1:26:01

Based off what you just said, you just said you fucked with no motherfuckers. You can't correct, you can't correct the fucked up bitch.

SPEAKER_17 1:26:08

This ain't got nothing to do with the bitch. I'm talking about us, black man. Take the eyes off the bitch. You said you showed up fucked up already with no mama. So how you gonna love her and you ain't get love from mama? Come on, which is the first teacher. Mama is the first teacher. So if you don't get love and nurture from mama, you gonna misuse and abuse her, because you sure don't know how to use a woman, black man.

SPEAKER_18 1:26:29

That's your opinion. It's not my opinion. That's your opinion.

SPEAKER_15 1:26:34

Whoo! That boy Charleston, man. The thing I love about Charleston, bro, is first off, nobody can talk shit like Charleston in terms of like the back and forth thing. Like he's undefeated in that. But Charleston says a lot of things that pokes people and that makes people uncomfortable. But most of what he says has a lot of merit to it. And in this case, I think it was no exception, right? He was talking about how a lot of men need to go back and apologize to their women. You understand, they baby mamas or their ex-girls or whatever the case may be, because a lot of times we didn't show up the way that we needed to show up when it comes to leading these women and being fathers to our children and, you know, things that showing up as a boyfriend, showing up as a husband. Sometimes we drop the ball in that area. And we need to go make that right because we are creating the same women that we complaining about. What's your thoughts on that, oh?

SPEAKER_16 1:27:39

Man, honestly, bro, when I seen that, and then it brought a tear to my eye. Because one, so what first of all let me say one, I don't always agree with Charleston be saying. Sometimes it'd be his approach, but I still take a step back and really listen to what he be saying. Like you said, a lot of stuff he do say do have a lot of validity. Sometimes I just don't like to approach on it. But that don't matter. Because what would the facts be the facts? But man, that shit, that shit just hit home because I was like, why did you automatically disagree when all he was saying was the first thing you need to do is apologize? One thing I I did, bro, like a while back, this was probably like right before I turned 30. Man, I went in my Rolodex and I just hit up a lot of women I had dealt with, honestly. And I apologized to them. Because I knew it was just a phase in my life, I was just reckless.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:38

Right.

SPEAKER_16 1:28:39

You know what I'm saying? And I was still a gentleman, you know what I'm saying? Because I'm not gonna be, you know, I ain't gonna be that wild, but it was like sometimes it was my approach, or I'm going ghost. I may be a gentleman, but then I just ghost them. You know what I mean? So I went, I went, and the the the women that I felt that I really could have possibly impacted, I reached back out to them and I apologize. I was like, hey, you know what I mean? Um I apologize for how I treated you or if you felt I ever treated you, X, Y, Z. You know, I was just single. I was trying to find myself. I was out of a serious relationship. I was not knowing what to deal, you know, how to deal with it, and things like that. Like I just kind of laid it out to quite a few of them. And, you know, I was like, if you don't accept my apology, completely understand. But I just had to get that off my chest and my conscience. Um it was just a time, it was just a time in my life too, because I was approaching 30. And that was also when my pops passed. So as I was approaching 30, it was just a lot of things were just coming to my mind, and just I was sitting in my thoughts a lot. And I even, because at one point too, I had text my brothers. I text my brothers, man. I was just like, hey man, I if I haven't been the best brick brother, I apologize. Like I probably could have been there more, even though they they said I was there. But that was a point where I felt like I kind of disappeared a little bit. I'm out partying, I'm out hanging out, I'm trying to get on the girls. I'm, you know, I'm I may not show up to all the family functions or things like that, because I'm, you know, worried about me, me, me. So um, man, I agree a thousand percent, man. It's a lot of the stuff that has been caused, we have caused it as men.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:31

Right.

SPEAKER_16 1:30:32

And the only way to undo it is to one, apologize and acknowledge the things that we have done and going forward just to be different. Which I feel like in many cases we are being different. Like a a lot more fathers are being in the home, a lot more fathers are being active. Even if they may be separated, the man is still wanting to, you know, be in the child's life. Not every man, I understand that. But more than the past are trying to do right. Or trying to, you know, just share custody, like whatever it is, to just to make it right. I I see a lot more men trying to make effort versus not being around at all, like in the past. So, but yeah, man, I I agree, man. And and like you said too, like some stuff is a little trauma. You know, and like bro was saying, you know, he kind of was making excuses a little bit because he he brought that up, which is fine, but just acknowledge that. And that's really all he was trying to say. Like, I hear you, but if that was the case, you wouldn't have brought this up. You know what I mean? So, yeah, man, he be he be speaking facts sometimes, man.

SPEAKER_15 1:31:45

Yeah, man, I think most women are looking for us to lead them. But I think a lot of women don't necessarily believe in us because of how we show up to the relationship. I mean, we just being honest, a lot of men don't show up to the relationship ready to lead. But we show up to the relationship wanting her to follow. Yep. We don't necessarily know where the hell we going. But we want her to be in lockstep and supportive and all of these things. And it's like, nah, sometimes, bro, you gotta take that time to really figure yourself out. Figure out what it is that you want to do, figure out how to communicate better, figure out how to voice our feelings, voice our concerns, things of that nature. A lot of men show up to relationships with communication deficits. We don't even know how to express what we're going through. But we want her to support us and help fix it and things of that nature. We can't even explain it right. And it's like that's what he's talking about. It's like we done showed up to the relationship. It's a lot of men who have had a woman who was loyal as hell, who was willing to run through a brick wall for him. Anything he needed, she was there. He get locked up, she there with the bell money. He ain't got nowhere to stay, come stay with my me and my parents. I don't have nowhere to stay, but come stay with us anyway. He ain't got a car, come drive my car. It's a lot of women who was loyal as hell, and who you was disloyal to. And we gotta address why that is. You understand? And a lot of us come from messed up backgrounds. But if we don't sort it out, then we gonna come in that relationship with those traumas and with those triggers and things that we don't have control over. And now we are tormenting a woman who would do anything for us. And that's the reality. That's how that's what it is. You understand? Just like he was talking about the like, oh, um, you know, you can't you can't control no some chicks you just can't control and this, that, and the third, and there's just some chicks just bad women and blah blah blah blah blah. But how bad is she if we chose her? Come on now. How bad is she? You chose her. Or how good are we? And that speaks to the delusion because if you the man that you say you are, if you the man that you need to be, you wouldn't even entertain a woman who wasn't on your level, or a woman who's just completely dysfunctional and and ghetto and ratchet and all of these things. She just you wouldn't even entertain that type of woman. Because I like to think a lot of time, I like to put myself in people's shoes. If I was single right now, bro, like I would have zero tolerance for that type of thing. It's I'm talking about, I don't care how good you look, I don't care how your body, I would zero tolerance for anything that's dysfunctional and chaotic and all of these things, you understand? But it's a lot of dudes out there dealing with women who they know are chaotic, who they know are just with them for their money and things of that nature. And then when it comes out and she try to take your money, or when it comes out and y'all get into it and boom, you done pulled out a knife and try to cut your ass or something like that. Now you acting surprised. No, you knew what you signed up for. But I think the question is, why did you sign up for that? And that's what a lot of men don't address. A lot of men have savior complexes. That's a problem. Because what that means is I know this woman ain't on my level. I know that she's traumatized, I know that she's dysfunctional, and I know that she's not as advanced as I am in my healing process, but I want to get her there. A lot of men have that. So now you're trying to drag this woman up to the level that you at, and she ain't ready to be there yet. And she dysfunctional as hell. Now she's pulling you down more than you dragging her up. Because she don't belong in that spot. She not, she not as advanced as you are in your healing process. But we got savior complexes. I ain't gonna give up on a relationship. I'm a I will go down with the ship trying to drag this woman up who I know don't belong next to me in the first damn place. And then when I can't do it, I blame her for being dysfunctional. When I knew the whole time, and that's what a lot of men dealing with, and that's what a lot who a lot of men got babies by, and and things of that nature. So him, them talking at that table, I'm just looking at it like, bruh, you chose her.

unknown 1:36:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_15 1:36:29

You got that much vitriol, that much. But you chose her. So you're not as healed as you think you are. You're not as advanced as you think you are. And that's all he's saying is that the women who was actually healed that we ran into and we wasn't who we need to be, we need to apologize to them. Right.

SPEAKER_16 1:36:50

Real quick, what what do you say? I know sometimes we make joke about it, about like some woman being a stepping stool and things like that. But what do you say to what do you say to the the men that you know may be with a woman and that woman helps her, helps him get into a better position. She has his back. She may be, you know, he don't have a car. She's taking him to work. She taking him to interview, she helping him with his resume. They both not in the best position, but she helps him to where he elevates. And now once he elevates, he kind of leaves her behind. Well, what do you say to that? Any man like that?

SPEAKER_15 1:37:33

Bruh, any man who leaves a woman behind and helped him elevate is a sucker. It's as simple as that. Because you hear men complain about how women are gold diggers and they leeches and they this and they that all day long. But you got a woman that was with you when you didn't have nothing, when you didn't even know who you was as a man. You didn't know your identity, you didn't know where you was going, you didn't know what your career was going to take, you didn't know none of that. And she was right there next to you riding, pouring into you. Baby, you need money, I got it. She ain't even got the money. She going to find, she borrowing the money from the boom, here you go, baby. I got it. She's supporting your everything. And then you get to a level of success and you like shove her to the side for somebody who wasn't there for the ride. You a sucker. I never respect a man like that. And I and it is what it is. Any nigga don't like what I'm saying, I ain't, I ain't hard to find. It is what it is. That sucker behavior. That woman should need for nothing. Even if y'all not together. You understand? Because relationships don't go right all the time. And that's that's perfectly okay. But it's like once I'm up and I'm doing my thing, she ain't gonna need for nothing. Facts. Because she was there in them dark nights. And and and you done been there in them dark nights where you, man, I don't know how I'm gonna pull this off. I ain't making the money. Um I feel like I'm supposed to be making, I ain't as advanced in my career as I'm as I'm supposed to be. Everybody around me elevating. I don't I don't know what's going on. Them them dark nights. She there with you. Nah, baby, you got it. Just keep going. Anything you need, boom, I'm gonna, hey, look, I was looking up jobs, and you know, these is available. Interviews, and let me help you with your resume. And you got women who do all of that, and for you to just shove her to the side for somebody who coming in after you done that's sucker behavior, bro. It is what it is. That's just how I feel.

SPEAKER_14 1:39:28

Um, all right, what we at? Uh hold on one second. On the QA. Yeah, we might need to get in the what time?

SPEAKER_15 1:39:39

Where we at? About an hour and 40. Okay, yeah, it is QA time. We be trying to keep the part in 90 minutes, man, but it just it just ain't been working out the last few. But we can go ahead and dive into QA. I mean, we can hit the I mean a quick take on the last one or no? I mean, I ain't I ain't got nowhere to be. It's up to you, brother. Trying to put me on the spot.

SPEAKER_16 1:40:04

Just real quick, Drewski. Drewski hoping the BET Awards. Right. What do you think? Can he save it? Okay, now I think if I think Drewski is the best person for the BET Awards right now.

SPEAKER_07 1:40:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_16 1:40:17

Like the eyes are on him. Um he's very talented, very creative, he's funny. I think if if any year would be the year to put Drewski on to get some eyes on and try to get some publicity, it would definitely be this year. And I think Drewski is the perfect person for it right now.

SPEAKER_15 1:40:36

I agree. I agree. I I think my only issue is that BET ain't black no more. In terms of ownership, in terms of like what it represents and things of that nature, back when Bob Johnson owned it, you know, it it like meant something different. Yeah. That's back when we had Beyonce performing, you know, when she was giving Terrence Howard the lap dance and all of these things, you know, Chris Brown out there doing the Michael J. Like, like it, like it meant something back then. You understand? And um, but in terms of can Drewski revive it, I think if Juice can't do it, nobody can.

SPEAKER_09 1:41:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_15 1:41:08

That's just how I feel. Um, but you know, I'm a Drewski host and I'm watching. But it is what it is. I think Drewski is top dog right now as far as as far as internet comedians and you know things of that nature, man. That boy just got a gift, man. And I I remember saying it when he first started, bro. He was doing the like, especially the like lawyer one. When he was talking about like, I got good news, I got bad news. The good news is the payment came through. The bad news, they gave you life. Cyanar. That Drewski. You understand? Like, I've been rocking with Drewski for a lot for a long time. So, like to see his elevation and all of that, man. I'm I'm I'm super proud of bro. And um, if anybody can turn it around, he can.

unknown 1:41:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_15 1:41:50

That's just my take on it, bro.

SPEAKER_16 1:41:51

You're not going to be doing that.

SPEAKER_15 1:41:53

I don't know yet. I don't know yet, man. We're gonna we're gonna see, man. Like I say, we might, you know, you might be able to pull a little something off, man, depending on depending on what they're talking about. We're gonna see.

SPEAKER_16 1:42:06

Okay, man. All right. Let me see. Let me see. Let me see. QA, we here. QA, man. Let me see. What am I gonna work with? Uh okay. My man says, I ain't gonna say who it's from. I ain't gonna put y'all out there like that. My man says, we're not ready to move in together because my 13-year-old daughter doesn't listen to me. Quote, quote unquote. Is it an excuse or no?

SPEAKER_15 1:42:34

So he's talking to a chick, everything's smooth, but his 13-year-old daughter don't listen to him, so he's kind of hesitant to move the woman into his house with him.

SPEAKER_16 1:42:45

No, I think the daughter doesn't listen to her.

SPEAKER_15 1:42:48

Oh, so the 13-year-old don't don't like the the girl.

SPEAKER_16 1:42:52

My man says we're not ready to move in. I'm just reading how she wrote it. My man says we're not ready to move in together because my 13-year-old daughter, quote unquote, daughter doesn't listen to me.

SPEAKER_15 1:43:02

Oh, so bet. So he's saying I don't feel comfortable moving in with y'all because your daughter don't even respect you. Yeah, that's right. If she don't respect you, then she ain't gonna respect me. Um it sounds like yeah. I mean, I think I think that's a valid concern. You know, I think that as a male, as a man in that situation, it's like, bruh, if you ain't got control over your kid, then like how's that gonna go? Because you the person who she's gonna look up to and respect the most. Let's just be honest. Don't get me wrong, I'm the man I'm paying things and whatever, whatever, but I'm a step parent to her if things go the way they're supposed to go. So she should respect you more. Like you should be the top of the. But if she don't respect you, I don't stand a chance. I ain't got a fucking chance. So I don't want to have y'all in my house and this is going on. So nah, I feel like that's a valid concern, bro.

SPEAKER_16 1:43:58

I agree. Now, okay, now flip it. Mm-hmm. What if it's just they cool, but she don't respect him? She doesn't, she doesn't listen to him.

SPEAKER_15 1:44:07

Same thing. Just the same thing because it's like when you get with somebody who got kids, it's a package deal. Right. This is what it is. So it's like you gotta, like your relationship with the kid is just as, if not more, important than your relationship with the woman. You understand? So it's like if I'm dating a woman and they kid don't like me, I'll break it off. I ain't lying. Like we we we can kick it, we can whatever, but in terms of us being serious and things of that nature, it's like, nah, because again, like like she's gonna be your priority. And if me and her got issues, then I'm always be on the outside kind of looking in. And as a man, you can't have that. Like, if we building a family, I'm the leader of this. I'm the but if she don't respect me, she don't respect you, clearly. It it's like it sounds like a recipe for just dysfunction. So you look you gotta wait till she move out.

SPEAKER_16 1:45:08

Basically. You 13 years in with your daughter, you dating somebody. Like you know, the pagan order changes. Supposed to at some point. So like does does so the pagan order changes once they get married. Correct. So until then, it's still the daughter over him. Correct. There you go. You can't make no changes really until then. And that's and that's a that's a crazy spot to be in, too, you right? I mean, because as a man too, knowing that you have your needs, but you gotta put yourself on the back burner because you got kids.

SPEAKER_15 1:45:49

Yeah, like that that's literally what signing up to be with somebody who has kids is. I'm signing up to come in as second priority. Period. And I think everybody is not built for that. Right. You understand? I think people have a hard time leaving their ego at the door despite the situation. And and that goes both ways. I would say more so for women, when they come into it when the dude got a kid. Like it's very hard for a woman to come into that situation and accept the fact that I'm in second place in terms of priority, right out the gate. Especially if you got a daughter. Come on now.

SPEAKER_16 1:46:22

That's his princess.

SPEAKER_15 1:46:23

And she's 13. So she thinks for herself. She she probably talks shit and all type of shit. You understand? So it's like, yeah. But you know, in terms of that, of her question, like, can we blame him for being hesitant to move in if your 13-year-old daughter don't necessarily respect you? Nah. Not at all. I can't blame him because if the 13-year-old don't respect you, I ain't got a chance.

SPEAKER_16 1:46:48

Yeah, it is. Okay, I am in a relationship with the man who still financially takes care of his children. His grown children. It wasn't a question. That's all she said. I am in a relationship with a man who still financially takes care of his grown children.

SPEAKER_15 1:47:09

Okay, so so I'm gonna perceive that as you giving him his props. And I wanna give him his props as well because as parents. She died. Shake with him. I mean, I'm gonna just ride with it because she didn't clarify. So again, we gon' we gonna salute, bro. Right. Because, yeah, when you got kids, yeah, it's your it's your job to be that backbone, to be that support system for whatever it is that they're going through and things of that nature. And if you are a woman coming into that situation and that bothers you, you're not mature enough to be in a relationship. Ooh.

SPEAKER_16 1:47:46

Yeah, yeah, okay. And it sounds like she's like stepparent. That's also what it sounds like. To the grown kids. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_15 1:47:54

Yeah, but when you sign up to be with somebody who has kids, you sign up for a package deal. It just is what it is. So I I'm not gonna I'm not gonna paint a picture as if he's wrong for taking care of his kids. I don't give a fuck how old they is. Right. They are his kids. And if it's my kids, I they could be 55. If they need some money and I got it, you it's it's there.

SPEAKER_16 1:48:19

Are you taking care of everything or just like necessity? Nah, hell no, I ain't taking care of everything. Okay.

SPEAKER_15 1:48:24

If I gotta take care of my everything for my adult kids, I failed. Yeah. Because if it's nothing else, I'm gonna I'm gonna teach you how to hustle. I'm gonna teach you how to get some money, I'm gonna teach you how to take care of grown folks' business. But if you ain't taught them how to take care of grown folks' business and they are adults and now you paying everything for them, yeah, hell no. As a woman, hell no, you walk away from that.

SPEAKER_16 1:48:47

And I wonder, what's what do you consider grown? 19, 20, that still ain't grown. Nah, I'm thinking like 20, 25. Like, that's grown. 19 25, 26. 25, even still. You should have your own and stuff. But I still like that. 25, you still trying to figure shit out. You may not be all the way in your career yet. But it's like they're gonna still need some type of help getting guidance. I'm not sure. For sure. But paying everything at 25. Hell no.

SPEAKER_15 1:49:15

You know? Oh no, no, no. No, I say, I mean, rent come up short. You need a little something. Kids got something coming up. I'm a little short. I'm trying to get to Hey, here you go.

SPEAKER_09 1:49:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_15 1:49:26

But paying your rent and your car note on that at 25? Fuck no.

SPEAKER_16 1:49:29

Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_15 1:49:30

Yeah, no. So again, that's why context is important. When y'all send these questions in, make sure some context is with it so we can answer it flush. Please, please, please.

SPEAKER_16 1:49:39

Okay. All right. This is for a young man who needs some help from us, bro. How do I communicate better with my wife after changing from my old ways? And he put in quotations being defensive. How do I communicate better with my wife after changing from my old ways? Being defensive.

SPEAKER_15 1:50:02

I would say leading leading the conversations. I think, you know, women get a lot of credit for being intuitive. I think men are as well. Um, we know when something's wrong. We know when it's the issue, we know when you know the vibe ain't right in the house, or she's bothered by something we might have done, or whatever. And if you got a history of being defensive and a history, which means I don't I don't wanna say dodging accountability, but you got a history of taking things personally, being defensive. I think if you initiate the conversation and come in with humility on a repeated fashion, that type of thing is not gonna go away overnight, you know. And I think that's that's a lot of times what people, I ain't gonna put that on me and people be expecting. It's like, yeah, I done been this way, but I'm a new person now. And you should accept me as this new person. No, no, no, no. It it don't work like that. It gotta be some consistency. It gotta be some showing up every day with this, you know, show showcasing this new person that I've become. So I just feel like in his situation, like leading the conversations, like, hey, baby, I know the vibe ain't right in the house. Can we talk later at nine? You know what I mean? Meet me at the kitchen table, man. We're gonna talk. You understand? And also letting her get what it is that she gotta get off without taking it personal. It just is what it is. Like it, it all boils down to how much you love this woman. If I if I love this woman, I should be able to adjust the lens that I'm looking at the situation through. And I think that's the biggest issue, like, from a person who's healed and a person who's still broken. If I'm broken, it doesn't matter what this person that I love more than anything in the world is saying. If it goes against what I believe or if I feel like they're trying to criticize me in any way, I'm gonna take it personal and I'm gonna get real defensive by it. But I think once you hit that maturity level, the lens that you're looking at that through is different. It's like, no, this is my woman saying this to me. This is, this is my, this is my co-pilot. This my when when everybody else ain't answering the phone or turn, she here. She she got me. I ain't gotta question that. This her saying this. Okay, let me listen to what she's saying. So I think it's just about getting to that point, one, and then initiating the conversations on a consistent basis when you know it's some some smoke or you know it's some beef in the air. And I think eventually she's gonna adapt that new version, but you can't expect it to happen overnight.

SPEAKER_16 1:52:40

Facts, facts, facts, facts. Damn, you hit that around the head. I'ma just say, similar to what you're saying, just listen to understand and not listen to be defensive. Right. That's one of the biggest things. A lot of times, women will let you know how they're feeling. And they feel a lot. So just understand, like, they feel a lot. But like, whenever she does come to you with something, like, really take it in, sit back and dissect what she's saying. Don't say, well, because it's because I was doing this or I was going through this. It it don't cause for all that. Sometimes it's more of after she's talking, it's well, how can I get better in this area? How can I help better support you? How can I be better for you? Like that's what she's looking for. She's looking to come to a resolve, and you just steady trying to defend yourself, whether you were tired or having a bad day, or you know, it could have been her getting on you about some other stuff. And so now you're letting that roll over because you haven't brought up other conversations. So it could be a culmination of a few things, but I think when you finally able to take a step back and really hone in on what she's saying and not try to pick it apart, I think the relationship will be better, much, much better. And I had to learn that too, because I was at a point of where I was defensive. Not saying that I was always right, but I always had to justify what I was doing or why I did it. And that's not what she was trying to hear. She just wanted me to one listen, two, understand what she was saying, and then let her know going forward, like a different method that I would do.

SPEAKER_15 1:54:32

Gotcha. You know what I mean? Gotcha. Question though, how how did you differentiate nagging and her trying to actually constructively criticize you? How do you differentiate that? Like, how do you get to the point the way you was comfortable in terms of your processing? Like, nah, she ain't nagging. This is something I need to really pay attention to. Like, what's the difference? Nagging and constructive criticism.

SPEAKER_16 1:54:57

Man, I'm glad you said that. I think going back to preaching of what we always talk about, you gotta understand who's talking to you. And you have to listen to what she's saying. If it's if it's a type of character flaw, you have to take that in. And the crazy part about that is it is them holding the mirror. Because hey, this is how you're treating me. This is how I'm feeling when you do XYZ. So as a man, you don't want your woman to feel that way. And you may think you're not doing it, but she's bringing it to you for a reason, bro. Right. You know, you you it's it's something that you're doing that is not right. So listen to what she's saying, take notes, and if she, you know, she's gonna give you the game on it, and so just apply it. And I think once you do that, it's gonna make everything better. But when you be combative and tell her what you're not doing, and you're not talking to her a certain type of way, or you know, you just keep defending yourself or making an excuse, it's gonna make it worse. Y'all not gonna ever come to a resolution because you're constantly being defensive. And so, yeah, it just takes you, again, man, just understanding who's talking to you. My woman loves me. She wants us to be better. She doesn't like feeling how she's feeling. Right. And so she's being vocal about it instead of keeping it in and eating her up. Women are gonna speak on it the moment she feels a way about it. Facts. That's just what it is. They're not like us. And so we also have to understand that. It's gonna be when you're in the shower, you could be cooking, you could be watching a game. If it's on her mind, she's gonna come to you. And you just have to be ready to accept to have that conversation. Now, if y'all had that relationship to where, hey, babe, I see what you, you know, I understand what you're saying. Do you mind if we talk more about it in a few minutes? Or can you give me an hour? I'm in the middle of work or something like that. Like, y'all have to have that type of relationship. But most times, women are gonna come to you when it's on their mind. Because I feel in the way, and I gotta get this off facts. Sometimes so you hey, you gotta learn your woman, bro, at the end of the day. Just learn your woman.

SPEAKER_15 1:57:13

Nah, fair. I I I agree, man. I mean, I think that, you know, me and man, we get to thinking about everything that we are doing. Yeah. Mm-hmm in the relationship, and it's like, man, you coming to me about this little petty stuff. But it's like, it goes, it goes back to what you said. It's just about it may be petty to us, but it's of the utmost important stuff. And you gotta ask yourself, bro, like it's it's it's certain battles that just not worth fighting. It's certain adjustments that can be made without sacrificing or feeling like we lost or feeling like we gave up, you know. And I think just by finding that happy medium, man, but that that boils down to like when you look at your woman like your partner, you start processing things a lot differently. When you look at your woman as somebody to take care of, then now it becomes a like almost annoyance when she brings up things. Because it's like I'm looking at it from the lens of I take care of you, I give you this, I do this for you, I make this sacrifice, I do this, I do that. And you got the audacity to complain about that. But when you look at your woman as your partner, it's like, wait, hold on. I'm not seeing the field the way I need to see it. You know, it's just like sports, right? Like when you play some quarterback or point guard, whatever, I gotta see the floor, I gotta see the field, I gotta see everything. And sometimes we get tunnel vision to this one area, and she's talking to you about, nah, baby, you need to look this way. It's this we need to work on too, and da-da-da-da. There's nothing wrong with being focusing on that, but we need to also address this. And I think when you look at your woman as your partner, you receive that that way. It doesn't feel like nagging, it feels like, okay, boom, she's keeping me on my game. Right. She making me focus on what it is that I need to, okay, boom. I'm not just fixing this to appease her. I'm fixing this to improve us. And I think once that hits, once that lands, once that becomes concrete, the relationship gets better. You understand? So I think that that's what it boils down to, man. And um, you know, again, it's about knowing your woman. It just is, man. Everything don't have a don't have the same urgency, but when you know your woman, you know what does. And, you know, that's gonna that's gonna help you along in that.

SPEAKER_16 1:59:41

This girl. Okay, she wrote two questions. Uh oh. Both of them. Yes. I don't know. You seem a little inexperienced to me, but we're gonna talk about it. All right. Every time I address something I don't like or how I feel, it's like I'm attacking him. Right? Why? So it kind of go back to what we were just talking about. Are y'all the same couple?

SPEAKER_15 2:00:08

That's me. Right. Don't send questions here from the same relationship. Damn. Well, we kinda, I mean, um, we kind of just talked about that though, but I think also delivery is very important. And that's something that we gotta address. A lot of us don't deliver things in the way that we should because it be bothering us, and it may have taken us a long time to bring it to the table, or we might have been sitting on it, it might have been festering. So when we come to you, it may be a little more aggression, it may be a little more sarcasm than what needs to be there. It may be a little more passive aggressiveness than what needs to be there. So I think we need to check the delivery. Um, fact of the matter is, bro, it's it's delivery is everything. And that's and that's ironic that a woman is asking that because that's the hill that they die on. It ain't what you say is how you say it. And sometimes y'all delivery is not the best. It's just not because you and your emotions, you and your feelings, or whatever the case may be. So when you telling me to do this, it's coming out as if you're talking condescending, you're talking down to me instead of talking, like leveling with me eye to eye, like, baby, can you please fix this so we can boom, boom. But instead you coming to me and what you're not doing this, or you're not doing that, and because of that, like that's reflective of the type of man you are. Like, like that's what that type of tone. That's how we receive that type of tone. Right. It's like, damn, you're you're not only questioning my behavior, but you questioning who I am as a man. Facts. And how I show up in this relationship.

SPEAKER_16 2:02:00

And yeah, and it ain't no just one minute either. Nah. They going on and on and on and on. So nigga, that like that little temperature, when that bitch, that bitch, bitch get to shake it.

SPEAKER_15 2:02:16

And when he explodes, it'd be like, and it's like women have no idea how much we hold back the things that we want to say in those moments and do in those moments because even despite that temperature bill and all that, we still love your ass enough to process and edit how we're gonna say it before it comes out. And I don't feel like we get enough credit for that, you understand? But back to what she's saying in terms of delivery, delivery is everything. You gotta check your delivery. It's not about how right you are. I think a lot of people get that mistaken in relationships. It's like, boom, I'm right. So it don't matter how I say it. I can yell it, I can scream it, I can tap you on the forehead when I'm saying it, I can push you when I'm saying all of that. But I'm right. It's like, no, no, delivery is important. Do you want the message to land or do you just want to be right and us be at each other's throats? I would much rather be together than be right. And a lot of people don't have that mindset, but that goes back to the maturity piece, right? Because a lot of them, that tone and how they address you and things of that nature is stemming from a trauma from their childhood. It's stemming from them always feeling attacked. So I gotta come out the corner swinging. You understand? Instead of coming out the corner like, nah, this is my teammate. We we in the same corner. You're not coming out. Facts. Fighting me. We in the same corner. But yeah, so I mean, bro, you gotta check your tone. You know, I think that that's what it is. I think as men, men are very reasonable. So if you can deliver something to us in a reasonable tone, and also tell us tell us the why. Tell us how this affects the whole picture. And then we're gonna be willing to receive it. But a lot of women don't do that, and that's the reality.

SPEAKER_16 2:04:10

All right, let me get one more. This other one wasn't good. I'm gonna get this one now. Um I got two up because this one is crazy. All right. Same chick, same, same, same young lady. When I call my boyfriend, every time when I say I miss you or anything, he says what I call for.

SPEAKER_14 2:04:40

Wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry. Wait.

SPEAKER_16 2:04:45

I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at the question.

SPEAKER_15 2:04:48

So she's saying that I text my man and say, I miss you.

SPEAKER_16 2:04:51

When I call my boyfriend, every time when I say I miss you or anything, he says what I call for.

SPEAKER_15 2:05:00

Like asking her why she called him? I guess, yeah. That ain't your man, baby. That ain't your man. I think we gotta we gotta be a little more honest. Hold on, pardon me. I'm sorry, I'm putting on chaps. We gotta be a little more honest about the level of the relationships that we are in. Some of us are in situationships, and because we like this person so much, we trick ourselves into believing that this is a relationship. Because the fact is, a woman that I'm in a relationship with, if she texts me that she missed me, my response would never be, what are you calling me for? What do you want? That's just not real. That's not how a man that likes you or loves you is gonna talk to you. It just is what it is. That's how a man who treats you like an option is gonna talk to you. That's how a man that treats you like y'all have an arrangement is gonna talk to you. But that's not how a man who loves you is gonna talk to you. So again, we gotta step, take a step back and ask ourselves, are we actually in a relationship or are we just in an entanglement, as Jada Pinkin was saying? That ain't your man. That nigga's fed up. What you want?

SPEAKER_16 2:06:09

Which is the ex which is also makes sense why, because the same question from right before that. Which makes sense why the nigga always feels like you attacking him, because he ain't trying to hear that. That makes sense. He not trying to hear none of that. I don't know what kind of situation y'all got going on, but it don't seem like y'all need to be together. We know. We done seen it.

SPEAKER_15 2:06:35

It don't seem like it at all. We in a she in a situation to where the man enjoys just. Matter of fact, we talked about it last podcast. I don't miss you. I miss you being naked, like I'll say. You talking too much. I miss you naked. You're talking too much. And not only are you talking, but you're trying to slam home boundaries and like protocol for how we move within this. And it's just like, like, we not that deep. Like, but I like I don't like you like that. Like, why are you? You should have been talking about you miss me. That ain't our relationship. What you call for? It's 2 p.m. We talk at 2 a.m. What are you doing? That's the situation. Let's put it on the table. She likes him more than he like her. That's what it sounds like. And that's just what it is.

SPEAKER_16 2:07:23

Is it did he really like did he really ask you out? Like, who said that y'all a boyfriend, girlfriend? That's what I want to know.

SPEAKER_15 2:07:29

Y'all talked five times last week on the phone. Who initiated those phone calls?

SPEAKER_16 2:07:36

Come on now.

SPEAKER_15 2:07:38

Questions that need answers.

SPEAKER_16 2:07:40

Outbound, outbound, outbound, outbound, outbound, outbound.

SPEAKER_15 2:07:45

I'm just saying, it's like it's certain people be tricking themselves into believing that this is more than what it is. But if you take a step back and analyze the situation, like y'all talked five times last week on the phone, five times. You called all five of them. If y'all done texted each other 20 times throughout the week, you initiated 19 of them texts. Y'all not together. You aspire for that, but y'all not together. They don't like you like that. Because when it's mutual, it's gonna be way more of an even split as far as the initiation of the conversations, the initiations of us spending time, of us going on dates, of whatever, like us sending memes to each other or reels to each other on Instagram. It's gonna be way more of an even split, but a lot of people are not in an even split. You with somebody to where if you stop doing what you're doing, the relationship will fall apart. That's not a relationship.

SPEAKER_16 2:08:52

I knew somebody like that, and they would come to me, what's wrong with your friend? And hey, if you want to be there, that's on you. They would complain all the time, he don't call me, he don't text me, he don't. But if I say, you know, let's go to the movies, he be down. If I say let's go out to eat, he be down. But I gotta always initiate it. Why is that? Hey, maybe that's how that man rolls. If you like him and you know he'll still do it, if you cool with that, so be it. But if you want a man to take more initiative, that's not him. And that's my dog. That's my dog, and he's not gonna take initiative. I'm gonna tell you that right now. So if you can deal with that, cool. But if not, if you want a man that's gonna take initiative and text you first and call you all the time and all that stuff, hey, you need to find a man that's gonna be more suitable for you. True. Because if you call him, he's gonna answer. Right. He's gonna text back. Right. He's gonna have intriguing conversations. He's a smart dude, but he's not making the effort first. That's just what it is.

SPEAKER_15 2:10:00

It's a big difference between a man being a gentleman and a man being interested in you. Those are two different things. And a lot of women confuse that because they're not used to dealing with gentlemen. Right? Like, oh, he texted me to make sure I made the home. Yeah, he's being a gentleman. He went out, he paid for it. Yeah, he's being a gentleman. It doesn't mean that he likes you. Those are two totally different things. How you can tell whether or not a man likes you is how willing he is to initiate things. It's a lot of women out there that, like I said, if you stop texting him today, how many days will pass before he texts you? If you stop calling him today, how many days will pass before he called you? That's not your man. That's not somebody that you are even like seriously entertaining. That that ain't how that goes. Because as a man, if I'm interested in a woman, I'm gonna be initiating things. Now, again, in terms of the romance and things of that nature, some men are just not romantic. It just is what it is. But we look out for you or we express our love in different ways. Right. But it's still gonna be initiation there. You understand? Like, but if he ain't initiating a damn thing, you initiate most of it, that ain't your man, he does not like you like that. And if you choose to stay there, that is an adult choice that you are making, and you gotta take what comes with that. Simple and plain, bro.

SPEAKER_16 2:11:24

Oh, facts. All right, last one, man. This young lady said if a guy has lost a job, has teenagers acting out, is it wrong to still want to spend time with him? So he lost his job and as a teenager that's acting out. Is it wrong to still spend time with him?

SPEAKER_15 2:11:45

And this is why contest is important, because it's like how long y'all been talking, how long y'all been dating, things of that nature. But I'ma just I'ma just answer the question as as as as she gave it. Is it wrong to still spend time with him? It seemed like it's early. Yeah. Under six months. That don't sound like nothing serious. Okay. I mean, shit, we gotta paint the picture because she didn't, you know, she didn't really leave us on. Six months. Yeah, six months. Still fresh. He lost his job. His teenager acting out, which is stressing him, which is affecting how he's treating you, things of that nature. I think um, you know, again, man, it's just about getting yourself to a level the way you got some options, bro. And a lot of people don't necessarily do that. Pardon me. A lot of people don't necessarily do that. So when you don't do that, now you gotta accept what comes to you, or you gotta try to make the best of a terrible situation. I think that this is a situation that you're clearly uncomfortable with. That's why you're asking us about it. And again, loss of job is big. Kid not acting right is big. Because all of that's gonna bleed on you. So now it's like you're gonna have to step up and be the quote unquote breadwinner of the other of the situation. And if his child is disrespecting him, that means he's probably disrespecting you. So it's like we gotta ask ourselves, like, is this what I really want? Am I comfortable with this? And if I'm not, then I gotta walk away from it. But if I can handle it, if I'm, you know, if I'm in that bobbin and weaving and I can handle it, then you rock out and you try to help that man build and things of that nature. But again, because you didn't provide context as to how long y'all been together, or like how long he had the job before he lost it, or like have you seen him up, and this is just a little dip in the situation. Like, we don't we don't know that. So the information that we going off of is y'all been rocking, like bro, say, six months, dude lost his job, teenager wilding. Should I entertain him? And if I'm answering it based on the information you gave, hell no. But context is important. Yeah. Unfortunately, we don't have it.

SPEAKER_16 2:13:51

I was my first thought would be no. But at the same time, you know, this is a man potentially going through something. He lost his job, the kid not acting right. He's talking to you, hoping that that could be some type of relief, some type of some type of spark in his life. And then you would up and leave him because he's going through those things. I think that would be tough for him. Because he already got other things going on. It's like, dang, I'm I'm rocking with this chick, and then the moment things are bad, she just dipped on me. And now I feel like he's gonna feel a way for other women and or it's just gonna be a thought that was always in the back of his mind, of course. You know, when here it is, another woman. Soon things go bad, they dip. That's how you know what I mean. So that's what's tough to me. Um I definitely would would if this was my sister, or like my little cousin or something in this situation.

SPEAKER_15 2:14:57

Here we go. Now we're getting somewhere.

SPEAKER_16 2:14:59

Come on. I would it would be hard, man. I would put it back, I would really put it back on them. Like, how much do you like this person? How much do you value them? Like, I would ask those questions. Um, do you see yourself with this person? Like you were saying, like, how long were they working at this job? Was it just something temporary? Was it like a a mass layoff with the company? You know what I mean? He he was spirit airlines. Alright. Nigga got nigga got laid off. I see the You know what I'm saying? Okay. I don't know.

SPEAKER_15 2:15:31

But, and I don't and I don't mean to interrupt you, good, but she said a wayward teenager. Mm-hmm. So that means she's a step parent. Right. Ish. And that means that you don't have control over your kids. Which is a very important aspect. So when you're saying if I'm advising my daughter, I'm advising my little sister, and she comes to me like, yeah, bro, he's cool, but he lost his job and his kid, like, just is going crazy, doing whatever you want. Like, it's like it's a very uncomfortable situation. My advice is gonna be to walk the fuck away from that. Especially given the timetable you gave. You said six months. So we're going based off six months. Six months, I'm learning this. And it's like, no, I'm not making long-term investment in a situation to where you can't control your kids, and clearly the kid is dysfunctioning our feng shui. It's different if, hey boom, my friend 18, crashing out, whatever, he about to be out the crib, we ain't tripping on that. But you're affecting like m the quality of my quality of life within this situation. It's just like no, if if I'm advising my look my daughter, no, there's a lot of men out here.

SPEAKER_16 2:16:47

Okay, we know a situation. Don't not the losing job part, but the kid acting out. And they're together. Would you advise that person to leave?

SPEAKER_15 2:17:01

Okay, so so let me get this clear. You saying that the job situation wasn't on the table. But the kid table, the kid acting out.

SPEAKER_16 2:17:08

Yeah, I'm using a situation that we know about. The kid acting out. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_15 2:17:19

Yeah. Because at the end of the day, bro, like when you walk into a situ and again, six months is the when you walk into a situation like that, you are second priority. So if your kid is acting out, not only am I second priority, but it's gonna be a while before I'm even even more attention's gotta go. So it's like, do I want that? Like, if we just starting out, or we just dating, or we just engaged, or whatever the case may be, and it's just like you're the person they need it.

SPEAKER_16 2:17:56

I think that I need a male figure. And you solid. You got a plan. You discipline.

SPEAKER_15 2:18:07

But in that scenario, and I mean I don't want to give too much to it, but he don't he you don't respect him. So it's like, I mean, yeah, you you could be solid, but if I don't respect what you're saying, then I'm gonna keep doing what it is that I'm doing. And because I'm gonna keep doing what I'm doing, now that's affecting my mama, which is affecting you. So again, it's like, nah, like I don't I don't wanna start no relationship like that. Like the relationship was to start off with a honeymoon stage. I don't want to start off in the middle of chaos and we climbing out of it.

SPEAKER_09 2:18:44

Gotcha.

SPEAKER_15 2:18:45

All right. Especially if I'm who I say I am in terms of like I'm a handsome guy, I'm successful, things of that nature. Like, I'm not, no. I mean, don't get me wrong. Like, I'm I don't necessarily judge you for it, but I'm just like, bro, like I I don't have to deal with that. True. Right now. It's a choice. Yeah. I agree.

SPEAKER_16 2:19:07

I'm with you. I'm with you.

SPEAKER_15 2:19:09

And if if the shit get in order, maybe, or he grows up, grown, get out the house, maybe we can pick this thing up, but no.

SPEAKER_16 2:19:18

I'm trying to be a little optimistic.

SPEAKER_15 2:19:19

No, no, I uh give the man some little hope. Give him some little hope. Nah, for sure. For sure. I understand it.

SPEAKER_16 2:19:25

Man, it's been a wonderful episode of Trill Academy. Episode nine. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. Uh, don't forget to follow us on Patreon, Trill Academy. T-R-I-L-L, A-C-A-D-E-M-Y. Facts. On Patreon. You know what I'm saying? Trilacademy.com. Y'all know what it is, man. Um, we appreciate y'all again. Hell of the conversation. Make sure y'all like, share, subscribe, give us some feedback. T, we appreciate you. We've been seeing you in the comments. For sure. You trying to pop things out. Um yeah, we're still open for, you know, for the for the Q ⁇ A, trying to find a name for that. So it's still open. Um, ready to to name that segment. Um, still haven't just landed on a name that just gonna stick just yet. Has some has some good ones out there, but just nothing that just stuck. Um But yeah, man, I I mean everything that everything that y'all do, all the retweets, all the shares, all the likes. Man, really appreciate it. I know it's a it's a lot that's on Instagram, but it's still a lot that's not even on Patreon. Don't even know about the pod. Right. So, I mean, we need y'all help really getting us out there.

SPEAKER_15 2:20:34

Yeah. Um, yeah, I mean, first and foremost, man, I'm humbled, man. I I appreciate everything, all the support, you know. This is a big transition coming from cruise season, man, and and and you know, building this thing from the ground and and seeing people here while we got the hammer and nails in hand. Like, it's it is different, you know. It means it means a lot. You know, we done built the platform before, so we know what our goal go into it. So to have y'all support, bro, it means everything. Uh everybody liking, sharing, posting on their stories, sending it to their man, sending it to their girl, things of that nature. Like that shit mean everything to me. And I just want to thank y'all. Um, man, man, man, man, man, man. I shit, I'm I'm typically articulate, but I can't even put that shit in the words, my appreciation. Um, but yeah, man, if you ain't um subscribe, make sure that y'all, again, on all streaming platforms, make sure that you subscribe so when we drop the podcast, they can go right to your phone. Uh Patreon, same way, man. You know, uh make sure y'all tap in. That's patreon.com backslash trill academy, T-R-I-L-L-A-C-A-D-E-M-Y. Um, yeah. I mean, man, there's more content coming. Like I say, I feel really good about the Patreon. Um, I feel really good about the content contribution. Um, but I'm always looking uh up at more. So, man, bro, got some some ideas on other content. You understand? So we're gonna start working on that, and again, y'all gonna be the first to get it, period. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_16 2:22:12

So um give me y'all's take on live streaming. Like, how would y'all feel if we doing like some streaming? There we go. I wanna know about that. Like when we out and about doing certain things, like how would y'all feel if we did that? Like, would is that something y'all would like to see? If so, you know, we're gonna try to make that happen.

SPEAKER_04 2:22:28

Right.

SPEAKER_16 2:22:28

Like even if we separate, even if we're not together. Like if y'all just want to see us, you know, we at the kids' birthday party or something, or we just out having a good time and just chopping it up, kicking it. Like, would y'all want to see things like that? Or do y'all want to just kind of keep it relationship focused? Or, you know, even if it's sports, y'all wanna hear sports takes or music takes, I mean, movie reviews, um, TV shows that's on, like, whatever. We, we, we able to do it all. So our bag is our bag is deep. Um, relationship is just one of the tools that we got. So just let us know. You know what I mean? You know what I'm saying? We ready, man.

SPEAKER_15 2:23:06

Yeah. I'm I mean, it's shit, man. Sky, sky, sky's the limit, man. Like it's already getting recognized as like an entity. Like I say, which like makes me proud. And like makes me, again, very, very, very, very thankful, very, very grateful, man, for everybody who's been spreading the, spreading the word, man. Trail Academy, like, we really building something here. And um, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm I'm I'm I'm just I'm just excited about the shit that's like coming, like the potential and like where it could grow to, what we can do with it, where we can go. Like, we got a lot of guests and shit that like want to be on it and and things of that nature, man. But we just trying to set all of that stuff up the right way to where the quality ain't sacrificed. And, you know, again, bringing people on here that's gonna be able to really, really give y'all game instead of just having a celebrity face on this motherfucker. You know what I mean? So it's like, it's it's you know, it's that, but y'all, y'all support is the fuel. So, you know, it is what it is. I appreciate y'all. Um, all right, man. We're gonna go ahead and wrap this thing up, bro. It's a record. My boy O been in this bag lately, man. I ain't gonna lie, eventually this boy is gonna have to get a goddamn playlist going on. Foo bag, baby. It's a record uh by my dog, Isaiah Falls, man. It's called Taboo. Again, we appreciate y'all, Trail Academy. We gone.

SPEAKER_05 2:24:51

Don't judge me if you like a light. I think it's dead.