Wasted Potential
An utterly fabulous podcast hosted by SAM DODD and NATALIE-ROSE PORTMAN
Wasted Potential
Sam Cant Function In Society, Nat Cant Stop Arguing With Men
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In this week's episode of Wasted Potential, Sammy and Natterz share what they did to celebrate International Women's Day, Sam is searching for a good therapist after coming to the realisation that a very rude boy might have been telling the truth about his involvement in society, and Nat is forced out of the furry closet, after an angry man who can't park reveals that she is secretly a moose.
She she's gonna stay there now. Consuela!
SPEAKER_02Oh, I've just tapped my mic, I'm so sorry everyone. Fair with No, hold your hand out. I can't feel you moving. I'm nowhere near ya. Wait, let me just show the camera.
SPEAKER_01Okay, oh yeah. Is it the Game of Thrones book?
SPEAKER_02Have a look.
SPEAKER_01It's House of Dragons.
SPEAKER_02That's right, it's the Game of Thrones.
SPEAKER_01I see. So is Game of D House of Dragons already the Song of Ice? That's fat.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01That's fat with a pH.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Because it has all the perspectives of like each character throughout the entire first season of Game of Thrones. Because that's only the first season.
SPEAKER_01North. It's got the maps in. Is it on?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Hi everyone. We haven't said hello. Welcome back.
SPEAKER_02Do you love it?
SPEAKER_01Yes, thank you very much. The the lands of the summer sea. Slavers Bay. Land beyond the Wolf. The North. The true north. That's it. Thank you, that's gonna take me years.
SPEAKER_02Well I've had it about three years and I was I was looking up because I'm a page folder. When I've done with the page when I've like done for the I'm a page folder.
SPEAKER_01Warning, when you get that book back, I am a page folder.
SPEAKER_02No I'm saying. Um but I got to like page 60. And there's like five thousand pages. There's not five thousand, there's like eight hundred. Go on, pull it up like that, you're gonna rip it often.
SPEAKER_01Oh many did you say?
SPEAKER_02Like eight hundred. That's an estimate. An estimate.
SPEAKER_01You are basically right. Oh you are. 801. Sam's not very well, everyone. And I don't that's actually how Sam feels.
SPEAKER_02That is actually that I'm out. She's really not cooperating. I do want to have a try. Well she needs to learn to stand up in him. Oh my god, girl. She's really not.
SPEAKER_01I've picked her up once today.
SPEAKER_02Anyway.
SPEAKER_01Anyway.
SPEAKER_02Um oh but uh I remember what I need to tell you about. So this is boy troubles again. I'm sorry, I know you don't get shit. I roll everyone. But it's crazy. I was telling I was telling the girlies at the other day. I might believe that out. I don't want you to know where I work. Um yeah, so I was I was messaging this boy male, a female.
SPEAKER_01I've just sorry, I've just clapped with my lips then, and that clacked like a lip smack. Yeah, but it with my tongue. So sorry, because that will be like a it was upset that. Sorry everyone. I thought you're gonna wear that and think, what the fuck?
SPEAKER_02Um but yeah, so I was messaging this boy. Boy, and uh he was like a few years older than me. And how old? Like I think it was like 18.
unknownAh.
SPEAKER_01No.
SPEAKER_02Um expecting like 26. He was 40.
SPEAKER_0150 years old.
SPEAKER_02In like the first 10 minutes of knowing him, I got very vul v vulnerable. And I was talking about how I've uh uh how I've got a mental health. I can't get on buses, I can't get on trains, struggled to leave the house. So I was telling him all that but in more depth. Uh and he said, Yeah, you need therapy, you need help, you cannot function in society. I was like thank you.
SPEAKER_01Thank you.
SPEAKER_02Because I I had a lot of trust in you then, even though I've known you for five, ten seconds. And now you've just completely fucked me over.
SPEAKER_01By saying I need to spend money.
SPEAKER_02No, I but I have actually been looking into it because baby's right.
SPEAKER_01Therapy.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Good luck getting the therapist.
SPEAKER_02I know. But there's uh I can't remember where it where it is. But it's like for free until I'm 18.
SPEAKER_01I get it free as part of work.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, but you deal with some shit.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I d I had uh a very sexual Are you allowed to talk about these? Yeah, I just can't say names.
SPEAKER_02Oh right, okay.
SPEAKER_01Um, I had a sexual call on one of them. Uh and I basically got asked uh asked what I smelt like. Um and then he got his warning.
SPEAKER_02Oh, like a proper sex I thought it was like something's gone wrong, like his banjo had snapped.
SPEAKER_01No, no, no. As in the call started and you could hear what he were doing.
SPEAKER_02Oh, okay, fine.
SPEAKER_01As soon, yeah, so fun straight aways. So because of stuff like that, you've kind of got to ignore it because there might actually be a problem.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_01Uh so it ignored it at first, but I could hear. Quite obvious what were going on. Uh not that noise.
SPEAKER_02No, but you could you hear that down phone as well.
SPEAKER_01No, it not grunting, it would just smack in.
SPEAKER_02Just do it.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So he got beat, didn't he? It was awful.
SPEAKER_01Uh and then he started asking him questions. And he was like, basically, yeah, and asked me what I smelt like. So then he got his first warning. If he carries on, I will terminate the call. I asked him one of the questions again, like on the screen. And then he went, Oh, giving me a warning, you're a dirty girl. I hung up the fucking phone. I'm like. That's bad. Please though, do you know, with the callbacks now, you could be waiting up to 14 hours. He's waiting a long fucking time. What's like if your phone one callback, so you'll get put through straight away, but then people that have to ring you back.
SPEAKER_02Alright. What's who's he done it multiple times in that day?
SPEAKER_01That's what I mean, so he's waited a long time.
SPEAKER_02Oh. He's dedicated.
SPEAKER_01Oh, he mustn't have a lot on that date.
SPEAKER_02I can't fault him for that. He must have had a free diary. I hate men.
SPEAKER_01Ardo. International's woman's day.
SPEAKER_02International.
SPEAKER_01International Woman's Day.
SPEAKER_02I'm not a woman. I don't know. I don't know why I'm smiling. This is my idea.
SPEAKER_01And to celebrate it, uh, because it were yesterday, wasn't it? Um, I had an argument with a man.
SPEAKER_02Do you know what I did to celebrate it? Watched The Housemaid when she kills a man. I loved it.
SPEAKER_01What a pot twist.
SPEAKER_02I was flabbergasted because I was watching it, I was like, Thank God, Sydney Sweeney. She was homeless and now she's got a fucking buff. Sexual man with a big gaff, loads of money. Then he fucking locked her in his cellar. In cellar. Wrong way. In Attic.
SPEAKER_01Attic.
SPEAKER_02In loft. Ah.
SPEAKER_01I'd let him lock me in the attic. Beautiful.
SPEAKER_02But not in that kind of way. Like I'd do it if it was a mu mu mutual.
SPEAKER_01A mutual lock-in.
SPEAKER_02A mutual agreement.
SPEAKER_01Having a lock-in.
SPEAKER_02You're gonna get locked in. Let's let's get locked in.
SPEAKER_01Let's lock in. Let's get locked in. Let's lock in. Let's lock in.
SPEAKER_02I loved it when she started smashing his china.
SPEAKER_01I did. Also, she had no shoes on.
SPEAKER_02Well, to be fair, I don't give think she g gave a damn about any more wounds because she had all that.
SPEAKER_01If you cut bottom of your foot, it's a main archery, you'll like bleed out.
SPEAKER_02You've got a main archery in your foot.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, yeah. You cut that on your thought, you're you're dying. Everyone.
SPEAKER_02I don't think I do. Do you know what that's just brought up? Do you remember it was somebody's eighteen I think it was like Chloe's eighteen. Did we do something for Chloe's eighteen?
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Someone cut the foot.
SPEAKER_02You.
SPEAKER_01I didn't cut my foot. I didn't cut it weren't me. I remember someone cutting the foot though. Because they took the shoes off because they were wearing high heels, it weren't me. I'd have fainted.
SPEAKER_02I swear it were you who cut the foot.
SPEAKER_01No. I I got really drunk once and stepped on loads of earrings. But that were when I were at home.
SPEAKER_02Why was there loads of earrings on the floor?
SPEAKER_01Thank you. So it weren't me. Came out absolutely having another earrings on the floor, and it all got stuck in my foot.
SPEAKER_02I hate that.
SPEAKER_01Ah. Like someone clean up.
SPEAKER_02I can remember in primary someone got. Do you know them like golden pins? Do you know?
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, like that.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. But like them basic golden ones. In the we called it the cloak room.
SPEAKER_01The cloak room, yeah.
SPEAKER_02I wonder why. They're not cloaks. That's my fucking that's my fucking waterproof from Prime Heart. It's not a cloak, I'm not fucking Professor Snit.
SPEAKER_01That's my gile.
SPEAKER_02That's my gilet.
SPEAKER_01My gilet.
SPEAKER_02Uh but yeah, we were all just we uh came in after his break. And we're all chatting here.
unknownOW!
SPEAKER_02Someone had stood on one and it's gone straight through a fault. Just for about that. But someone had stood on one and it had gone straight through a fault. You just heard these really shout OW!
SPEAKER_01Really remember you. I'm sorry. I actually bet on camera you're gonna see my entity leave my body.
SPEAKER_02That were entirely my heart. You really were as well. I'm at a vibrate. Don't be silly. I'm at a vibration that sent shockwaves through the table.
SPEAKER_01You're making it worse.
SPEAKER_02I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_01I'll pick her up.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah. What?
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah. Aww. She were dancing, she won't be rude. No, I got that. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_02I got that. I got that. Um I've got a story. Okay, cool. Go far.
SPEAKER_01Er So the weather. The weather's been absolutely lush recently, hasn't it?
SPEAKER_02Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_01Absolutely lush. Er well one of my friends uh stopped at a boy's house when I were in Liverpool. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02For like a change. When you when your hair got curled.
unknownSorry.
SPEAKER_02Sorry.
SPEAKER_01Sorry. Sorry.
SPEAKER_02Not really fucking hurting. Sorry. Sorry about that.
SPEAKER_03Sorry.
SPEAKER_02Just give me a minute. Oh wait. Oh. That really fucking hurts.
SPEAKER_03Sorry.
SPEAKER_02I couldn't feel my jaw.
unknownOh well.
SPEAKER_02That went horrible. That weren't horrible feeling.
SPEAKER_01Sort of. Back to what I was saying.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, sorry. Sorry.
SPEAKER_01Sorry. Sorry. My friend, when we were in Liverpool, my friend went for a mini sleep hover with a boy.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Just to like, you know, like hold hands. Um. And uh she woke up the next day, the next day after being just being on a night out. Uh and it was like 10 in the a.m.
SPEAKER_03Okay.
SPEAKER_01And this was like when we first saw the first little bit of sun, I bet it was like six degrees max. And he turned round to said friend and went, Do you want to come to Sefton Park with us? We're gonna have a barbecue. They had tennis jackets out, they had bikes out, then it was a solid six degrees. And he was ready to go for a full-on swim, sunbave, sun cream on. She said when she left there were deck chairs on the front.
SPEAKER_02That is so fun. That's six degrees. I don't care. I bet that were a right time. Did she go?
SPEAKER_01No. Should the same reaction as me? It's six degrees and it's 10am. No.
SPEAKER_02A barbecue with a load of men.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I'd like bikes in the hallway. I don't know what that means, but definitely bikes in the hallway.
SPEAKER_02Bikes in the hallway. That just means they're going out for a bike ride in the blazing hot sun. In the blazing hot six-degree sun.
SPEAKER_01Just rare in my laugh because that's proper typical British people. Little bit of sun, mum's not cooking, we're having salad for tea. Barbecue picky bits. Barbecues I'm raising outside. That's hot. Everyone's in shorts, boob tubes, sun cream.
SPEAKER_02I hate a boob tube.
SPEAKER_01Do you not like wearing anything?
SPEAKER_02No. They're just very uncomfortable.
SPEAKER_01They squish me down a bit. Well, to be fair, I can't find one that fits with a good.
SPEAKER_02That's okay. That's okay. We all have us problems, me too. Yeah. You know, like I struggle more than you. Yeah. Yeah. I have it worse. I have it worse. With your big coconuts. With my big calcium cannons.
SPEAKER_01That's just been cut.
SPEAKER_02And we're back.
SPEAKER_01And we're back.
SPEAKER_02You've just missed out on something special.
SPEAKER_01Do you know what has re-come to light?
SPEAKER_02What?
SPEAKER_01Re-come to light.
SPEAKER_02Re-come to light, come back to light.
SPEAKER_01Come back to light. Er do you know that American Girl? They love that I hit myself. They love that I hit myself.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Whoa.
SPEAKER_02She's come back. No, she's always back for me. I love her.
SPEAKER_01Have you seen a recent dancing video back to that song? And so someone commented, please Gabby, we're at a war, not now.
SPEAKER_02I love Gabby Hanna. Is it Gabby Hanna?
SPEAKER_01I think it's Gabby Hannah, but uh TikTok name's not that. Is it not? No. So then I don't know if I've been gaslight. No.
SPEAKER_02I suppose Gabby Hanna.
SPEAKER_01I think it's Gabby Hanna.
SPEAKER_02Whoa.
SPEAKER_01Whoa. On a dancing video, she like gets in the floor. They love that I hit myself. She rots to the floor. And I mean body slams to the floor. I love her. And then it goes into that my bodyada. Yaddy yaddy yada.
SPEAKER_02Badiada yada yada. She's secretly Megan Distallion. In disguise. I do love her. I just know her through that song. That not that one. But the climb down on my head and watch it all for plot. I love that one.
SPEAKER_01Whoa, and what if I'm the monster?
SPEAKER_02On the fucking uh Is it Genius? Yeah. I would never do that ever.
SPEAKER_01I would never do that.
SPEAKER_02Never.
SPEAKER_01Never.
SPEAKER_02Never.
SPEAKER_01Genius, if you ever asked me, I'd not go.
SPEAKER_02If you ever ask me, I will say the same thing. I would never do that unless they give me some auto-tune. So I cannot do that.
SPEAKER_01Sorry, that'd really hard for me to put down.
SPEAKER_02If they give me some auto-tune and some reverb.
SPEAKER_01It really shows how some artists have no talent.
SPEAKER_02Well, I have no talent. I have talent, but they just can't. They just can't present it.
SPEAKER_01Like Britain Spears. Spice Gaddles.
SPEAKER_02Gaddles. Although Benson Boone He did it and he was actually really good. Benson Boone is a talented boy.
SPEAKER_01Really eilish did it and she was stunning. It were What Was I Made For?
SPEAKER_02Beautiful. Really Eilish did G I don't think she did do that one. I think it might be.
SPEAKER_01But not on Genius.
SPEAKER_02I don't think so.
SPEAKER_01She's done one. And it was beautiful.
SPEAKER_02I love the Do you know I'm loving at Minute?
SPEAKER_01Ice Spice.
SPEAKER_02No.
SPEAKER_01I'm really liking her at Minute.
SPEAKER_02She's a bitch. Do you know Madeline?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, yeah. Essential C.
SPEAKER_02So I don't support Ice Spice.
SPEAKER_01To be fair, I didn't for ages for that reason. But she's come out with a song called Two Teot? I can't be fucked.
SPEAKER_02I can't be fucked. Fucking stench knocked her heart. Did you poop? No, but I On my heart! On my ass. No, but I faked one and she just thought it were real. And now she's fucking face down ass up.
SPEAKER_01Fiero. Got asked a question the other day. What's your type of men? It's Fiero. But as Vicant Bridgeton.
SPEAKER_02Any bridgeton. That's who I had a dream about last night. I was cello. And because I was thinking, I was like. I had a dream about a hot man last night. And I was like, I was trying to think. Yeah, Fiero. Yeah. Like it's it was Fiero.
SPEAKER_01Oh, so it wasn't.
SPEAKER_02Well, it was hit, it was Jonathan Bailey.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. He's gay in real life. I know. Such a shame.
SPEAKER_02Not for me.
SPEAKER_01Honestly, it makes me want to hit my head on a brick wall. Oomph. He ain't got your number. In a different life, he's got mine.
SPEAKER_02Shit, yeah, I'll send you it.
SPEAKER_01Shit, I'll send you it on the gram. On the gram.
SPEAKER_02On the gram.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I've finished watching the la the season that's just come out of Bridgeton.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01He's in literally two scenes and oh my god. He's so hot. I can't watch Bridgeton.
SPEAKER_02Why? She's just pissing me off. Why? It just fucking winds me up. Because it's like. Like, I like the vibes and I would like to watch it, but it's just when they're in ballroom and fucking chandelier starts playing. Sean Mendes. Sean Mendez, but orchestra. And Orchestra Sean Mendes start playing. I'm like, what the fuck are you playing in?
SPEAKER_01360 comes out and ChalixX.
SPEAKER_02Like, are you serious? Where's Ave Maria?
SPEAKER_01Do you know you've done that in the last time?
SPEAKER_02Is that I'm a vocal stim? Do you know what my new vocal stim is? Come on. Are you saying that things are a privilege because of the housemaid? Coke is a privilege. Stop. Sorry. Sorry. Stop. Sorry.
SPEAKER_01God, that'll hit you fast though. So inappropriate. Wait until I tell you our mum. Are you coming to the charity ball or?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I've been paying for it. Slowly but surely.
SPEAKER_01Nice.
SPEAKER_02When is it?
SPEAKER_0125th of April.
SPEAKER_02Stefan fucking told me that. I've given her about£40 for it. I've still£10 away.
SPEAKER_01You can do it.
SPEAKER_02So I'll finish my payments tomorrow, but I also need to buy a violin bow.
SPEAKER_01Um What's that buy a vin bow?
SPEAKER_02A violin bow. So like on a violin.
SPEAKER_01You can play the violin.
SPEAKER_02No. But what could be because what we're doing In fact, I'm just gonna When we're being musical for some of the songs we're gonna need to fake an orchestra and sometimes when you do it digitally, it sounds fake. But if you get a guitar and a violin bow, it does fucking job. And it does the job. I don't know why that would be like it just does the job. It does job. It does job. You just look so fed up with life. Like are you okay? So I can't afford an orchestra.
SPEAKER_01I've literally got one under bed. Do you want it?
SPEAKER_02Tiny one.
SPEAKER_01Er I've got a fun little story. I don't have one.
SPEAKER_02Go for it.
SPEAKER_01Just reminded me.
SPEAKER_02Tell me everything.
SPEAKER_01So in my family.
SPEAKER_02Stack it's broadcasm.
SPEAKER_01That's what we said. Stack it's broadcasm. I know. It was my mum that said that. Stack it's broadcasm. I hadn't heard that in ages. So we always said there was this one boy from a primer.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Not gonna say his name. Uh, but his mum were very vocal as in about her opinions.
SPEAKER_02Or did she just bark?
SPEAKER_01I said she just barked. And it was such volume, eye, full on, connected to speaker stereo, whacked fully up, reverb, reverb off, reverb. Reverb. Reverb off. She'd just sit there and scream. Anyway. So hi, was she like insane? Possibly. I don't know. Um so there were each a child in each of our year. So the one in mine, the one in Charlotte's and the one in Tyler's. Um so we saw this mum quite often. But anyway, the one in my ear, we always say that he's my secret boyfriend that lives under my bed.
SPEAKER_02Oh why?
SPEAKER_01So it's fun, isn't it? That's my story.
SPEAKER_02Wow. I feel like I feel like I only don't get it because I'm not part of this inside show.
SPEAKER_01Oh god, are you okay? God, sorry. I am not adding to the fact that I've we've got another like imaginary friend.
SPEAKER_02Oh I w I weren't even linking it to Patricia.
SPEAKER_01Patricia's fucking real.
SPEAKER_02Patricia, uh where'd you fucking got your straw and started going like that and it started levitating kitchen? Angela!
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I ain't seen Patricia for in a while though.
SPEAKER_02Well I've fucking drunk I saw in kitchen. Just fucking shit up.
SPEAKER_01I've not got that drunk in a while. As in I've got drunk, but as in like that state to where I get then get referred to as Patricia in a while.
SPEAKER_02You know, you know.
SPEAKER_01A while. In a goddamn while.
SPEAKER_02God on you. You sober. Have you gone thober?
SPEAKER_01I'm literally going out this Saturday. Yeah, we're black current and vodka.
SPEAKER_02Just black currant, because you're sober.
SPEAKER_01I am sober. King. Yeah, I'm going out this Saturday.
SPEAKER_02Are you excited?
SPEAKER_01Uh yeah, actually, because it's with my two friends that I've not seen in a while. I used to work with. Why and Jacob. Mm-hmm. Another story time about that.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_01And it's actually really agendous. Yeah, yeah. It can go. It can go in. Sorry, that's just me being expressive.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_01Because I'm oh angry.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_01So where I used to work, um, the owner's not nice. It were alright with me. I thought you were gonna be talking about thingy.
SPEAKER_02You know exactly what I'm on about.
SPEAKER_01I don't, that's why I'm staring at ya. No, no, no, no, no. Uh-uh.
SPEAKER_02My back sweating.
SPEAKER_01My back skillin'!
SPEAKER_02Back skillin'! You wanna play dominoes or use your backkelling? When I get up, there's gonna be massive sweat patch back of you. Ew. Cause this fucking I put eating on before we came in. Because you always dummy top. And then you came in and played it with do warm.
SPEAKER_01Sorry. I'm I'm perfect temperature now though. Anyway, back to his dorm here. So the owner were really nice with me, were really good. The whole place were really good with me. Okay. Um, but if he if they don't like you They make it obvious. Yeah. You're in for a bit of a bad time. And there's this new uh this new staff that they've got, this new member, and the boss messaged the manager saying, uh, can you tell her to put some makeup on? Because she's got acne apparently, like quite bad acne. Yeah. Because then she goes, she's back and forward from dermatologist. I nearly said gynecologist. That's your foo-foo. That's a foo. That's your foo foo. Uh dermatologist.
unknownOh.
SPEAKER_01Back and forth from dynam gyne and talk fuck dermatologist.
SPEAKER_02Stop shouting, please.
SPEAKER_01Sorry.
unknownOh.
SPEAKER_01And uh the manager then didn't use, you know, correct brain cells and didn't think, I'm not gonna tell an 18-year-old girl that. She didn't think that. She thought, I'm gonna tell her. Told her, it's a poor 18-year-old girl hearing that.
SPEAKER_02That is awful.
SPEAKER_01I know. Can you cover up your acne, please? You don't rise.
SPEAKER_02Is that how they said it?
SPEAKER_01I don't know if that's how she said it, but that's what you were basically meaning. You told her to put some makeup on because she looks awful. Horrid. I know. How cruel.
SPEAKER_02That is nasty if someone said that to me.
SPEAKER_01I know. That yeah. One of my friends who still work there sent as a voice note in his group chat, and I would playing it out loud and my dad heard. And I just thought, that's terrible. Someone said that about me, and I don't even have spotty skin. Like, I've quite nice. Um Jealous. I would still be fucking hell. Like, that's horrible. That is nasty. I'd not go I'd not stay, I'd I'd leave. Terrible. Terrible saying which. Yeah, that just reminds me. Her dad did ring up and I gave the boss an absolute bollock.
SPEAKER_02Good.
SPEAKER_01I'm gonna say fucking good. Just my mum or dad didn't ring up or storm up. They're not my mum.
SPEAKER_02They're not my mum and dad.
SPEAKER_01To be fair, if I heard that, I'd have just gone, fuck off then.
SPEAKER_02I'd be fuming.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I would. That is that is that's that's it's vile, isn't it? Bear in mind.
SPEAKER_02I don't even mean that's just fucking cruel.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, like it that's just inhumane, like vile. Bear in mind, this man is like 52 and she's 18.
SPEAKER_02Wrinkly, ugly, old man. And she's youthful. She's jealous of her youth. Horrible. There's a band called Jealous of Youth. Based around here.
SPEAKER_01Oh really?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01She's probably a part of it. Lead singer. No. Oh the boss.
SPEAKER_02I was gonna say. I'm a solo act.
SPEAKER_03I don't share my fame.
SPEAKER_00She she's gonna stay there now. Consuela! Consuela!
SPEAKER_02Consuela! Sailor Black.
SPEAKER_01No. Consuela! Where'd she come from?
SPEAKER_02You said she can stay there.
SPEAKER_01She can stay there.
SPEAKER_02No, you went, she can stay there. Consuela! I'm sorry, it's just where my fucking mind went, okay. I just don't understand.
unknownI just don't understand.
SPEAKER_02Oh, dead now, I think.
SPEAKER_01You're dead?
SPEAKER_02Priscilla.
SPEAKER_01Oh.
SPEAKER_02Do you know who I've been listening to a lot of recently?
SPEAKER_01Oh.
SPEAKER_02This woman. This woman. She's called Alfreda. She's got the biggest fucking hair I've ever seen in my life. I think I've seen. She goes, hands on my hips, standing in the line. Bathroom stall at a single tonight. Space for two, I pull you inside, then you open your eyes, then you open your eyes, then you open your eyes, then you open your eyes.
SPEAKER_01I never told ya about my argument with a man. Oh no, you didn't! I never finished. I just felt it when you said woman.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, go on. Why did he call you woman?
SPEAKER_01No, he called me a moose. Oh shit, a bit like called a lot of things, but never moose anyway. It were a bit what?
SPEAKER_03Moose.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I'm a bit what anyway. So me and Chloe came out um from having a quick 12-minute holiday and some bed.
SPEAKER_02Alright, okay.
SPEAKER_01And her car was parked perfectly. Chloe can park.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01He had parked like that. So his wheel were on the line, so I couldn't open my door to get in the car. So I went, Chloe, can you pull out? He's parked like a fucking idiot. Didn't realise he were in the car. He's wound the window down and gone. Excuse, I can't think what he said now. He went, it was because of the other car. And I went, What? There were another car next to me. I went, okay. He went, so I'm not parked like a fucking idiot. I went, well, you are because I can't get in car. He went, no, I'm not. It was because of the other car. I went, he's in his line. So the other car was perfect in his line. Went, well, the other car's gone then. Gone now. I went, okay, we'll sort your car out then. And he wop like starting to shout at me. And I was like, like, I actually could not be bothered. And he went, I just don't think we should call.
SPEAKER_02Well's going on. This is not the time.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I was just like. staring at his man through the window. Didn't realise we were in it. And he went, You shouldn't just say people are parked like a fucking idiot. I went, well, if you park stupid, then you are a fucking idiot, then aren't you?
SPEAKER_02Just in bookmates cover.
SPEAKER_01You don't know what's happening in my life.
SPEAKER_02I thought it.
SPEAKER_01And I've just done that.
SPEAKER_02They called you a moot.
SPEAKER_01And then Chloe like pulled out, so I tried to get in the car. And I just went, it's not that important, is it? You park like an idiot. I don't know how else you want me to explain your parking. You over at line, I can't get in car. And he went, oh fuck off your fucking moose. As I got in car. What the fuck? No, you are a fucking idiot. Because who calls people a moose? Like, what happened to Wetwipe? Wally. Oh, you spatula. Moose. What you spoon. Yeah, like you willy. We've got loads of insults. Where's moose coming from? I got it in Karen. Chloe went, not where he's saying to you. And I went, you were arguing with it. Why? And I went, because I pointed out the obvious and I said they were part like an idiot.
SPEAKER_02And then he called me a moose.
SPEAKER_01I don't know. He called me a moose. It made me laugh because I just thought, oh, men and their fragile idiots.
SPEAKER_02What a sad, sad lie.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, you parked like a wallet. Like, don't get upset when someone calls you out for it. And also I didn't realise you were in the car.
SPEAKER_02This man's parked like a dickhead. Alright, alright.
unknownI don't know.
SPEAKER_02It's a Chloe.
SPEAKER_01What were you saying?
unknownWhat?
SPEAKER_01It just made me laugh. So I just thought, how? This was a fully asked of a man, by the way. He had two kids in the back. That changes everything. Yeah, he was a dark. He was a fully asked of a man.
SPEAKER_02I thought it was like someone your age.
SPEAKER_01No, no, no.
SPEAKER_02Like an angry.
SPEAKER_01No, because I'd have proper laughed and been like, how fragile.
SPEAKER_02I learn how to park. Yeah, maybe that other man we're having a bad day, because he's got kids. I'm not sticking up for him.
SPEAKER_01I'm gonna say what's happening.
SPEAKER_02But like there's there's there'll be other things contributing to why he's such an angry prick.
SPEAKER_01I don't care, learn how to park.
SPEAKER_02Why is such an angry fucking moose? Moose you call you a goose.
SPEAKER_01I'm pretty sure it were a moose.
SPEAKER_02Like it like a silly goose. He said silly goose!
SPEAKER_01He didn't say it like you fucking goose. It wouldn't have been that.
SPEAKER_02You fucking moose. Moose is so weird.
unknownThank you.
SPEAKER_01Thank you, that's oh my god, that's literally my favourite animal. You know. That and I just thought on international's women's day.
SPEAKER_02Well And I've done I've done my part.
SPEAKER_01And I've done my part.
SPEAKER_02Done my part. Right, we ought to wrap up.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_01What is your take from this week?
SPEAKER_02Um that men are nasty. Even if they disguise themselves to be hot rich and lovely, they will lock you in a fucking attic. Trust. I've been there done that. Been there done that messed around. I'm having fun, don't put me down. I'll never let you see me on my feet. This time, baby, I'll be bully proof.
SPEAKER_01Sorry. That is actually what we've learnt this episode.
SPEAKER_02That many pricks and that Alfreda's hair is f Give me a phone. I've seen it. Are you sure? Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I know what you mean.
SPEAKER_02Are you sure?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I just don't know that song.
SPEAKER_02She's a small artist.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, she's on TikTok quite a lot.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah. And she's British.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I know what you mean. I just don't know songs.
SPEAKER_02Well, why not?
SPEAKER_01I've got better shit to do.
SPEAKER_02What do you do on a night? That way. What do you do on a night?
SPEAKER_01Well, I've been watching Housemaid, Bridgeton. Crying at my computer. Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_02Like a seraphuls would cry. Nah!
SPEAKER_01I just sound like a four-year-old. Yes, that's what we've learnt.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Men with fragile egos won't get far.
SPEAKER_02Alfred uh when we when we upgrade, you will be on the pod whether you like it or not. And there's nothing you can do about it.
unknownBye.
SPEAKER_02Goodbye now.
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