Eurotrip

Remember Eurotrip? It's a Millennial classic, and I'm here to unpack it. Like the kids in the movie, I'm venturing out to uncharted waters -- I'm just wearing more clothing while doing it. (With one glaring exception... you'll have to listen to find out!) I'm a podcasting greenhorn, so the audio quality is about as good as Scottie's relationship with Fiona. Regardless, if you wanna check out a cheeky movie recap, and get some wild facts along the way, then welcome aboard. We're taking a deep-dive in the history of the movie, the inspiration behind it, and figuring out exactly what the deal was with that French robot. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:27

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:30

Hello. Welcome to Stupid Comedy Stuff. I'm your host, Emma Kat, and uh I'm a stand-up comedian in Austin, Texas, and this is a podcast about stupid comedy stuff. So thank you for joining me. This is actually the first full episode, so I'm you know really, really excited and and uh nervous to be doing this. Uh and today we're gonna be talking about the movie Euro Trip. Do you guys remember that movie? Euro Trip? It's a millennial classic. So um I will let you know that I am actually not wearing a bra today, which I do feel is appropriate for a discussion of uh the film Eurotrip. Uh that's not because I'm a uh young, sexy, newbile college co-ed. It's uh because I am a 41-year-old perimenopausal middle-aged woman, and I've had to turn my air conditioner off to record this because I can't afford to have any background noise. So I'm sweating like a pig. No bra for me, but figured I'd mention that just seemed appropriate for the subject matter at hand. Um, I did want to talk about this movie. I I just got a little bit fixated on it recently, and the reason for that is is kind of stupid, funny, um, appropriate for this podcast. We recently, my husband and I, we recently watched the movie Fargo, and uh in that movie, William H. Macy's son is named Scotty, and the movie ends with Scotty never finding out, you know, that his dad is a criminal and and his mom is dead. So I this is just the kind of lowbrow uh you know nin can poop I am. I just started going, you know, Scotty doesn't know, Scotty doesn't know. And yeah, I just am the kind of person who conflates Fargo with the Euro Trip, but uh but it got me curious and um it made me want to uh re-watch Eurotrip. The I think the first time I saw this movie, I was in college. I I graduated high school in 2003, uh, and the the kids in this movie graduated in 04, which is when the movie came out, so um we're around the same age. I actually went to Europe myself in 2007. Um, you know, so it was a little bit uh after it wasn't exactly like a post-high school thing, it was a study abroad thing, which gosh, just gets hoidier and toitier. But um, I as I was saying, the first time I saw this movie, uh, pretty sure was in college, was drunk, uh, would stake some some uh confidence on that. And um, you know, I found this quote from one of the filmmakers, uh, this filmmaker, David Mendel, he in an interview he said, in a weird way, that's what we were setting out to do with the whole movie, somewhere some young drunk person is enjoying some form of Euro trip, and you know, ding ding ding hit the nail right on the head, you know. But certainly when he's you know, in my case. But um, this movie Mendel, uh, this movie was created by three individuals, uh, Alec Berg, David Mendel, and Alex Schaefer. Uh, they co-wrote and directed the movie together. Although uh Schaefer is the only one to get the directing credit, uh, the directors' guild wouldn't let them share it, so they picked his name out of the hat, and he was the lucky winner who got to be the official director. Um, and the three of them met at Harvard, and uh they wrote on Seinfeld together, and then they uh made this movie together, and they they said that their apparently their goal with making this movie was to create a film that uh the type of movie that they would have snuck down into their basement to watch as kids, you know, like a like a Porkies or a Revenge of the Nerds, and you know, I think they they hit they pretty much nailed that aesthetic with Euro Trip. I mean, you know, boobs and wieners are flying everywhere. And uh what's more they got Ivan Reitman as a co-producer on this film. Now, I mean, in addition to being a Hollywood legend, uh, Ivan Reitman was also a producer on Animal House, uh, which, you know, we can probably say is like the the granddaddy master of this genre. Um, and you know, I guess they they kind of had some tension on the set. You know, Reitman wanted to direct and maybe kind of take over the you know the creative direction of the movie, wasn't really happy with the final cut. Uh sounds like neither was the studio. They um changed the title. The original title of this movie was Ugly Americans, which I really like. Yeah, especially these days, I feel like that would be a very fitting title for uh this movie, considering uh current European-American relations. Uh, but um that yeah, so it was called Ugly Americans, but they changed it to Eurotrip because they want DreamWorks, they wanted to capitalize on the success of Road Trip, the film with Tom Green that had come out in 2000. And I will admit, as a kid, this the scheme it worked on me. I, you know, I was like, wow, is this a sequel to Road Trip? Where's Tom Green? You know, couldn't they afford him anymore? It's I don't know. But uh, you know, needless to say, Eurotrip was not nearly as commercially successful as Road Trip was in the theater. However, it did find some cult success on DVD. It was released on in a non-rated version, you know, significantly more nudity. Who doesn't love that? And a lot of its uh cult success had to do with Scotty Doesn't Know the song, uh, which ended up being a a Billboard a Billboard Hot 100 chart song in uh 2006. So uh want to recap the movie for you today, share some fun facts with you, and um let's dive right in.

SPEAKER_03 7:13

Let us make it laugh for one whole month. No actual Europeans were harmed in the making of this movie.

SPEAKER_01 7:34

The movie opens and we meet our hero, Scotty Thomas. He's played by Scott Mecklowitz, uh, a very charming actor. This is his first movie, if you can believe it. And um, when we see Scotty, he is graduating high school. Uh we're in Hudson, Ohio, uh, but we're not really in Hudson, Ohio. Uh we're actually in Prague, Slovakia, or Prague, Czech Republic, excuse me. Um the whole movie was filmed in Prague, except for the nude beach scene, which we will address later on. Um, so when we see Scotty, uh he is graduating high school and also he is being dumped by his girlfriend Fiona. Fiona is played by the actress Kristen Kruk. Now, Kristen uh is best known uh for her role on the WB drama Smallville. And I thought I'm just bringing this up because I read a New York Times review of the movie when it came out. I thought this was kind of funny. Uh, they don't even bring up her name, they just say uh she's played by an actress who looks like she stepped off the set of Smallville. And I was like, uh, do they not know that she's actually in Smallville? Like NYT, come on. I mean, is are they like, you know, it's just another woman ruining the workplace, you know, whatever. Who cares? Um, anywho, um, you know, all I really know about her is that uh she would have been really into Nexium cult at this time or around this time. So I wonder if there was any whisperings on set. Uh, but anyway, not gonna start any scandalous rumors. So Fiona is breaking up with Scotty. Scotty is heartbroken, he is crying in all of his family pictures. Um, next scene, he is in his bedroom back home. He's with his best friend Cooper. Uh, Cooper's played by the actor Jacob Pitts. Jacob Pitts has been in a couple things that I really enjoy. He was in the cult uh TV show, uh cult Comedy Central TV show Strangers with Candy, which is just one of my all-time favorites. Um, you know, you should really look it up if you've never seen it before. And he was also on an episode of Sex in the City. He played Sam Jones, uh, the male Sam Jones who who fucked Samantha Jones. Uh, just a fantastic premise for an episode, if you ask me. Um, so yes, he plays uh Scotty's best friend Cooper. So um in the scene, they're in Scotty's bedroom. Scotty is moping, he's super depressed about Fiona breaking up with him. Um, and he starts telling Cooper about a German pen pal that he has named Mika. Now, um uh Scotty refers to Mika as Mike, uh, because he translates Mika to Mike, you know, as the English version of uh Mika. And uh Cooper is a little apprehensive about this. He warns him, you know, hey, you may want to not really be emailing with this this person, this guy. He this may be a creep, this might be a predator. Like, what if he asks you to meet up? You know, what if he has like nefarious intentions? I'm I'm cleaning up the language here, you know, that this is the early 2000s, and you know, is a very homophobic time, but like I think you you understand. Um, and so you know, Scotty's kind of like, but you know, he takes it under advisement. So they have that discussion about Mika. Um next scene big graduation party. Scotty and Cooper ready to let loose, try and forget about Fiona, or so they think, right? So um they're at this party and uh they run into a pair of twins that they go to high school with that they're friends with. Uh these twins are named Jamie and Jenny. Uh Jamie is played by the actor Travis Western, and uh Jenny is played by the late, great Michelle Trachtenberg. Um now, uh just I I want to share something about her because she's in this movie uh Euro Trip. Michelle Trachtenberg's dad was apparently from Germany and her mom was from Ukraine, and she actually learned to speak Russian, uh, you know, not for this movie, but for a movie where she played Lee Harvey Oswald's wife. How uh stinking cool is that? You know, just what an awesome, awesome lady. Uh, she is sorely missed. But um another little thing I want to add about this scene. Um, there is a hot tub scene uh nested within uh this party scene that I do not want to get into. Uh please Google Euro Trip hot tub scene at your own leisure. But um suffice it to say, the New York Times review of this film calls uh calls Jacob Pitts a two-bit David Spade, which is a harsh burn, but I will say, like, he is pretty spadey in this movie. Um, you know, just just look at that hot tub scene. Yeah, you'll you'll see who I'm talking about. Anywho, so the Scotty and Cooper, they are talking to the twins. Uh the twins say they're planning to go to Paris, or they're they're rather they're traveling through Europe for the summer before they go to college, starting with Paris. Jenny, Michelle Trachtenberg, is hoping to meet a handsome European man while she's there. She's heard about someone who went off to Europe and met a man and then sailed around the Mediterranean with him. Uh, Cooper very helpfully adds, Oh, that sounds kind of gay. Uh you know, and and Jenny has to say, uh, I am a girl setting off a running joke throughout the film that um she's just one of the guys, and especially has to remind Cooper that she is, in fact, a girl. Um, which I mean, you know, the kind of um amateurish homophobic joke, but period-specific joke aside, I um I do think that it's it's kind of I I will give three male writers a little bit of credit for uh writing a female character um who is yeah, I mean, because this is a familiar sort of position. I mean, I've been in this position, yeah. I I know I'm sure a lot of my my girlfriends have been in this position, so it does bring authentic in some sort of way. But anywho, uh they're at this party, the party's going on, Scotty's there to get up, forget about Fiona, right? But the band starts playing, and who shows up as the lead singer of the band, but Goodwill Haunting himself. He's got a shaved head and piercings everywhere, barely recognizable, but Mr. Matt Damon himself. Very, very well-known, famous cameo. So he gets up there and he starts singing the song Scotty doesn't know. Uh Fiona also joins him to just, you know, uh grind in the humiliation. Uh, a couple interesting things about this scene. Um, so it turns out Matt Damon was able to do the cameo because he one was friends with the filmmakers. They all went to Harvard together. You know, there's that blue-blood connection again. And two, he was in Prague where they were filming the movie. He was doing Brothers Grim. So therefore, he was available to do this cameo. Also, the song, Scotty Doesn't Know. Like I said, it ended up becoming a hit later on. It, you know, charted on the Billboard Hot 100. So uh this song was not being sung by Matt Damon. It is, in fact, performed by the band Lustera, like Lister, I'm not quite sure. Um, but they are from Boston, also Harvard alumni, friends with filmmakers, and Matt Damon. And I thought this, okay. I've guys, this is really interesting. I pulled this quote out from the bassist Nick Cloutman from an interview that he gave. I thought this was really interesting. He said, I already had the annoying riff to the song lying around. I was like, should I do something with this? But I don't know what. If you can imagine it slowed way, way down in my head. It always it always sounded like new order. New order? Can you imagine Fiona doesn't know is like a new order song? Like, how does it feel to watch me fuck Fiona? Yeah, just I can't imagine it. I mean, you know, thank goodness they they went with the original, but so moving along, the next scene is in Scotty's bedroom. He is drunk from the party. Uh, he's checking his email, and he gets a flirtatious email from Mika. Uh, what the email says, Mika has gotten uh his message that Fiona broke up with him and wants to arrange a meeting. Scotty has a moment of gay panic. Let's just call a spade a spade. And um, and he freaks out and he says, you know, absolutely not. You know, what Cooper sold him is going through his head. He's like, he writes this email back to Mika right away. He goes, Stay away from me, you sick German freak. You know, I'd never want you to talk to me again. He sends the email. So the next morning he wakes up, he's severely hungover, he looks up and sees that his little brother Bert is fucking around on his computer. And that's just so like a little brother. I mean, yeah, I have a little brother. I yeah, can testify to that. So um his brother's reading his email and he says, Oh, I can't believe you got this email from this hot chick who wants to come see you. And and you know, Scotty's like, What are you talking about? Mika's a guy, and and Bert's like, No, you idiot. It says right here, I'm such a sad girl. So, and then Scotty says, No, I have a picture. And so this is where we see Mika, the real Mika, for the first time. Scotty shows Bert a picture of Mika, uh, well, two people. There's a man and a woman. He says that the Scotty tells Bert that the man is Mika and the woman is Jan, Mika's cousin. Bert says to Scotty, no, you idiot. The man is Jan, a man's name, and the woman is Mika, a woman's name, similar to R. Michelle. The man in this picture is Dorky, he's got high-waisted pants, glasses, just you know, classic dork. The woman is an Aphrodite. She is blonde, curvaceous, blue-eyed, porcelain-skinned, just the you know, picture of Romanesque beauty, or I should say, an Aryan ideal, perhaps. Um, and let me just say that uh that um uh Mika is played by Jessica Boers, the actress, Jessica Bors. Uh, she's a German actress. Um, gonna share more about her later, but this is the first time we see her. And um so also wanted to share a little bit more about the actor playing Scotty's brother. Now uh his name, probably gonna say this wrong. I'm gonna try, but his name is Niall Ishkha Koff. I think I got it. And he's from Uzbekistan. That blew me away, you guys, when I found out that he was from Uzbekistan. I mean, that kid is doing a flawless American accent, you know, uh, for the most part. Um, and then I read here, uh, there's this quote from Alec Berg that said, um, you know, the reason that they hired him is that they would have had to pay an American actor something like $20,000 just for one word of dialogue. But uh with him, they ended up paying him $150. And they had a running joke on the set uh as a bert became a unit of current currency. So, like, how many berth will it take to put a sign on the wall? Oh, that's six berth. Uh, I don't think we can afford that. I was just like, are you like, are you guys really making a joke at the expense of like a child actor who you lowballed from the former Soviet Republic of Uzbekistan? Like, come on. I mean, yeah, I guess I guess that is what's happening. Um as we move on, uh, Scotty tries to email Mika again. He is realizes he is blocked by her. He tells Cooper what's happened. Um, you know, he's freaking out. So Cooper says, look, why don't you just fly to Berlin? That's where Mika lives. Let's go there, let's go meet her, and uh, you can explain what happened in person. So they get ready to go to Europe. So they get to Europe by uh becoming couriers. They they fly to London first because there's nothing available to Berlin. We don't ever find out what they're courage, but um, they just you know get cheap flights as couriers. When they get to London, we first see them in front of Big Ben. And uh Cooper gets a call from his job. There's a running joke through the movie that he's um working at a summer internship, but he's not really there. He's just kind of got them on the run. So he gives them some bullshit and uh you know hangs up. Then uh they book a bus to Berlin for the next day, have a night to kill, and so they decide to go to a pub. And they uh walk into a local pub. Unfortunately for them, it's a pub that belongs to a uh football organization of fans of the Manchester United, and they come face to face with a very aggressive, very big, very angry man who's played by the British actor Vinny Jones. And uh Vinny Jones used to be a football player himself, and uh he actually uh you know, of course, looked him up. He uh played on a number of football teams, um, but not Manchester United, interestingly. Um, but yeah, so they come face. To face. They uh are um on the precipice of being beaten up, but uh they're able to convince the football hooligans that they are fans of Manchester United by singing a Sheena Easton song. And uh so um they get pissed drunk, blackout the next day. Uh they wake up on a double decker bus to Paris, and um they're going to a Manchester United game. So uh they realize that they've missed their opportunity to go to Berlin and need to quickly regroup. So uh Scotty comes up with the idea to get in touch with the twins, Jamie and Jenny, since they are in Paris. And uh he uses Cooper's cell phone to call Jenny and uh gets in touch with them. So once they reach Paris, they separate themselves from the soccer hooligans, football hooligans, pardon me, and uh they meet up with the twins. So uh once they get there, um that's where we learn that Jamie, uh the you know, the boy twin, is obsessed with his Leica camera and his Fromer's guidebook. Uh, these are the two most important things that he's brought on the trip with him. He also carries all of the money and the passports in a uh like an under-the-body wallet clip that he keeps on his person and gets made fun of for by Cooper. Even though it's a really a good idea, like you know. Um, but anyway. So they meet up in Paris. Uh, they decide to go to the Louvre first, although once they get there, the line is considerable. Um, it's like like waiting for a taco in Austin. Uh so while they're waiting in line, they see a robot. Uh and what I mean by a robot is like a street performer. Um, they have, I mean, when I was there, uh yeah, I'm no expert, but um, there were several of these in Europe, like just people that were uh wearing face paints and costumes, and um, they would like either stand still, like perhaps like dress like Roman statues or mermaids or you know what have you, and they'll just like stand on the street and uh you would give them money or like take pictures with them. Uh it's just like a busking endeavor. So that's what this guy is. He's he's a French robot, and um, so Scotty sees him and and they start kind of making fun of him and teasing him, and and this escalates into Scotty fighting with the robot. You know, this is one of the more famous scenes in this film. And uh what I found out about this is that uh Scott Mecklowitz, the actor, actually took a mime class, and so that's why his little you know robot moves are so on point. And furthermore, he was trained by the actor that played Barney. Barney the dinosaur. I mean, you know, can you believe that? What a what a strange, strange detail. So uh the fight ends with Scotty kicking the robot in the balls. Um, so I guess you could say, like, he doesn't love him. He doesn't love he. Yes, sorry, that was terrible. Uh, they uh leave the Lou Paris without going into the Louvre. Uh they're at the train station. They're about to leave. The boys are on the train when Jenny meets a man, a handsome European man, who sweeps her off her feet. Just the very thing she was describing at the graduation party, right? It's this man named Christoph. He like he seemingly like pops up out of nowhere and just approaches her and he's like, Hello, Jennifer, can I woo you? You know, basically, like, yeah, just it's just like the most ridiculous, like Daniel Steely sort of thing ever. Um, you know, he kind of looks like a like a more Italian John Stamos. Um, but yeah, so uh he like kisses her hand and and she's like, Oh my gosh, like I wish I could stay, but but my train is leaving, you know, I I have to go. And so, you know, she leaves and and she says goodbye and says hopefully she'll see him again. Um so they're on the train and then so they're in this train compartment, and uh what follows next is uh one of the most well-known uh scenes in the movie, you know, apart from the robot fighting scene. Uh they're in the train compartment and the door opens, and in comes a man, a man dressed in a a tan suit and a salmon tie with a matching pocket square. He comes in and he says, Bongiano, and it's it's a very young Fred Armison. Um and so uh you know, he squeezes himself right between Jamie and Cooper, and um every time their train goes through a tunnel, he just gets more and more uh you know handsy. It's it's just like a like everything out of the sexual assault playbook just just just gets worse and worse and worse. I mean, um eventually we see him with his pants off and he's smoking a cigarette. And um you know, he's going scoozy, scoozy. Um, but uh yeah, so it's it's really it's really quite quite the sight to be hold.

SPEAKER_04 28:05

Scoozie.

SPEAKER_03 28:11

What? Big tunnel.

SPEAKER_01 28:38

So they escape from handsy Freddy finally, and um they exit the train and uh they discover they're in Crans sur Meur, which is on the French Riviera, and there's a famous nude beach there, which they decide to go check out. Um, and again, pretty pretty well-known moment from this movie. So um uh the boys are they go up, um they're separated from Jenny and um somehow, and uh they go up to the beach uh looking hoping to see uh just a gaggle of naked women, and then discover that it's nothing but a huge old waggling wiener fest. Just a bunch of guys like them uh who, you know, have come and struck out. Uh so then uh we see Jenny uh come up on the beach. Uh and this this is where we we get to see um uh Michelle Trachtenberg. She they have her dressed very dowdy uh at first. She's wearing like a like this very um severe looking uh kind of granny sweater. It's sky blue, it covers her entire body almost from head to toe. And um she has a matching bucket hat on, like a sun hat. And so she takes off her hat, and then she takes off the sweater, shakes out, you know, and sure this is why they did this, right? To get the scene, like you know, she takes off the hat very slowly and shakes out her long, luscious hair, and then pulls off the sweater and like slowly the camera like pans up and like slowly reveals her her beautiful, like gorgeous, perfect body, and you know, Cooper just almost like turns into like a hound dog, you know. You can almost see him like panting. Um, and he's like, Oh my gosh, I guess she is a girl after all. Um, and unfortunately, all the other guys on the beach realize that at the same time as well, and so the foursome have to like hightail it out of there immediately, which is rather like there's a lot of creepy implications there, yeah. If you know what I mean. I mean, if you know what I mean, I mean, I you can just imagine, like, gosh, I thank God they've like made it out of there, is all I can say. Like, thank goodness they got away from that beach in one piece. Oof, my my 41-year-old heart is beating for those little 18-year-olds, so I'm just scared. But anywho, so the after the beach, they get to Amsterdam next, and um Cooper picks up a flyer for Club Vandersocks with three exes, and he's like, I'm gonna go here. Yeah, I'll see y'all in the morning. Um, Jenny and Scotty go to a bakery and they eat an entire plate of groovy cakes. Guys, pace yourselves. Golly kids, I can't believe it. Um, so Jamie, meanwhile, goes to a camera store because he needs a new camera. Uh I'm sorry, a new battery for his camera. And uh, while he's there, the woman, the clerk, just just starts flirting with him. She just goes, Oh, you know, you're you're so sexy, American, and your camera's so beautiful. Yeah, why don't you just come out back and I I suck your dick? I mean, that's not the exact dialogue, but it's it's basically the dialogue. And um, and so yeah, they they just go out back and and she just sucks his dick. Because I guess everyone in Amsterdam is horny all the time. And um, so while this is happening, uh Diedrich Bader from uh from Drew Carey comes up behind him with a knife. He has he's like, Ah, I will rob you. And because Jamie's having such a good time, he just you know rips off his his money belts with all the money and all the passports. He goes, you know, here, take it. Oh, I don't care. And and you know, the burglar goes, Great, thanks, and just takes off into the night. And so, um, yeah. And so while this is happening, um uh Jenny and Scotty are at the the club. They're they've eaten all the brownies, they're starting to have a psychedelic experience. Uh they're uh Jenny is starting to feel like oh my god, they're like seeing tunnel vision. She's starting to feel like, oh my gosh, I'm having the munchies. She goes and grabs a plate of food from another patron. Um Scotty starts to freak out. He like takes off his shirt and he starts yelling that he's got a bad batch of hash brownies. Then the the owner of the uh the bakery comes over and he says, Hey, hey, these aren't hash brownies. We're just a simple Dutch bakery. Which I mean, for my money, like truly one of the best jokes, like in the movie, if not like ever. I mean, that's just just like uh just phenomenal, like like truly, you know, it's just so so so good. Um, so and meanwhile, poor Cooper, he's at Club Vandersex, which he never ever should have gone to. Uh, he's there and he's with um Lucy Lawless, Zina Zina the Warrior Princess herself. Uh, she is the head dominatrix, and um, she brings out all these women. He thinks he's gonna have a grand old time, you know, surrounded by these beautiful women. But unfortunately for him, he gets strapped, uh, handcuffed to this giant rack, and these two men, burly men in leather aprons, come out, electrocute his testicles and nipples, and then sodomize him with what looks like a vacuum cleaner from the 1960s. Like it's just, oh gosh, it's very brutal. The poor guy. Um, I read that apparently there was a deleted scene, an Amsterdam deleted scene, where uh Cooper went into the Anne Frank Museum and appeared to accidentally be uh sodomizing the Anne Frank mannequin in front of one of her living relatives. Uh, but Steven Spielberg himself, who is uh, you know, someone uh I can't remember what his position is with the DreamWorks right now, but he's you know, he's got some some influence with that company. Um, but yeah, he he said to to Alec and um Alex and David, uh, hey, I love the scene, but you're gonna have to cut it because my name is literally on the Anne Frank Museum. And wow, like my response to that is boy, capitalism. Is there anything it can't ruin? Really, no, um clearly that's a joke, but yeah, that would be really like I wonder if that's on one of the DVDs. I I truly I don't know. I just I I I didn't I didn't watch, you know, any kind of extras like that. So moving on, our heroes leave Amsterdam. So they uh when they leave they're forced to hitchhike because Jamie got robbed and so they don't have any money left. Um all they have is the change in their pockets, which adds up to a dollar eighty-three cents. So uh they end up hitchhiking with this uh terrifying guy who drives a truck. He uh speaks German. Scotty badly speaks German and thinks that he's going to Berlin, but he's he's not going anywhere near Berlin. Um he's got a shady history with Berlin, it turns out, it involves stabbing a woman and sodomizing a horse, let's just say. Um, so this guy does not take them to Berlin. He in fact drops them off in Bratislava. So uh as I said, they have a dollar eighty-three cents. And um they're like, oh my gosh, what are we gonna do? Um, well, it turns out $1.83 will buy them a fancy dinner at a huge hotel, um, first class treatment from from servants and uh and a whole lot more uh bottle service. Um, so I I looked this up. It turns out that in 2004, when this movie would have been set, Slovakia was still using the corona. They had not switched over to the euro, they switched over in 2008. So um the approximate exchange rate for one US dollar to one krona in 2004 was 33 krona to one US dollar. So they had almost two dollars. So I would guess they've had about 60 corona. Um yeah, I don't know, maybe that's enough to buy you dinner and drinks and hotel, I don't know. Um I've still got the claims adjuster brain here. I'm uh just always trying to analyze the market. You see, capitalism can't is there anything you can't ruin? But um, so after they go to dinner, they um they realize they have 27 cents left, and uh they go out to a club where they drink absinthe. Uh the boys do, and they hallucinate the green fairy who's played by the actor Steve Heitner, and uh he also plays Banya on Seinfeld, which is you know kind of cool because yeah, the guys wrote Seinfeld, so they brought him in. And uh meanwhile, Jenny reunites with that handsome stranger that she met at the train station. So he brings her off in the corner to woo her with promises of sailing around the Mediterranean and um, you know, just being together all day, careless whispers. But then he says, Oh, my wife makes the best sangria, so you know, she's she she's got some principles. And so she storms off in a huff and she meets up with the guys, she takes a big swig of the absinthe. Um, they all hit the dance floor. Scotty doesn't know is playing. It's it's the dubstep remix, or you know, whatever it was big back in 2004. And um, you know, next thing you know, uh Cooper and Scotty are sitting on the sidelines, and they see uh Jamie and Jenny making out with each other. Yeah, they they are the worst twins ever. It's yeah, pretty disgusting. Um and they they realize it. Uh they they're kissing each other, they they pull back and they realize and they start screaming, and it's it's a pretty, pretty gruesomely fantastic scene. Um so the next morning, while um everyone's recovering, uh, you know, they're humiliated as well as hungover. Uh Cooper keeps giving them a hard time, and um eventually he you know gets tackled by Jamie. Jamie's so pissed off, he just like punches him in the face. Uh while they're brawling, this guy pulls up, this this man just pulls up like a like a fairy godmother. He pulls up in a a Dukes of Hazard style car, so an orange car with a number seven on the side, and he goes, you know, you want to go to Berlin? I take you to Berlin. And so great. Timing could not be better. So they hop in the car and they get to Berlin. And uh, once they arrive in Berlin, Scotty and Cooper go to Mika's apartment while Jamie and Jenny wait outside. God knows what they talked about. Um, so uh Scotty and Cooper get uh up to the apartment, and um, once they get there, they meet not Mika, but Mika's dad. And Mika's dad lets them know that uh Mika's not there. She's actually left for the summer. She's enrolled in a summer at sea program, leaving from Rome. And um while he's explaining this to Scotty, Mika's little brother, he's this tiny little blonde, blonde, yeah, white-skinned uh boy, he's standing behind them playing with some crayons, and he draws a black little Hitler mustache on his face. Cooper sees this happening, uh, and then he starts, uh the kid starts goose stepping around the apartment. Now, um I you know, when I was younger, I I thought this was pretty funny. Uh yeah, it was definitely funny. I'm sure when they wrote it, I'm sure it slapped in the writer's room and everything. But um I must say, in a 2020 watching this in America in 2026, not really didn't really hit, right? Just for obvious reasons. I mean, you know, just in Germany far less fascist than America right now. Um, what a what a turn of events. But um, so uh so yeah, they hear that Mika's in Rome and uh they say, okay, well, we need to go to Rome. Um, of course, the problem is they're out of money. Now um it turns out that uh Jamie has sold his camera. Uh he um sold the the Leica, his precious Leica, to get the money to go to Rome. And uh once they arrive, they get into the basilica right away uh and they start looking for Mika. So Jamie is mistaken for a tour guide, and he and Jenny go off uh to lead a tour while Scotty and Cooper uh continue to look for Mika. Scotty and Cooper end up upstairs in the basilica, they're in some private apartments, and um Scotty, or I'm sorry, Cooper ends up ringing the bell of San Marco, um, because he's just being a dick. He's just oh hey, what's this dude? And he rings it. Um the bell of San Marco lets everyone know that the Pope has died. So great job, Cooper. You know, you just set off a world catastrophe. So um outside there's an Italian man who goes, Oh, you know, the Pope is dead. Um and uh back inside the basilica, uh, they go into this other room, Scotty and Cooper. This is where the Pope clothes like that, it's almost like the Pope's wardrobe room, I guess. Um, and so uh Cooper is being a complete fucking asshole. He just like puts on the Pope hat and goes, Look, I'm the freaking Pope. I mean he's you know, he's just acting like an 18-year-old douchebag, right? And he just starts like running around the room. Scotty's like, hey, stop. He's like just chasing him, trying to get him to stop. Uh Cooper puts a pope hat on Scotty at some point, and then uh Cooper stands over by some candles. He's just being a little idiot, like, ugh, and the candles light the pope hat on fire. And Scotty's like, no, no, the hat's on fire. And Cooper's like, I know, I know, the hat, the hat, the hat is on fire. And and Scotty's like, no, no, no, it's really on fire. And so Cooper freaks out, he like pulls the hat off, and he they throw it into the nearby fireplace, and the hat sends up white smoke out of the basilica, and that tells everyone that everyone looks up, and what that signals is that the uh College of Cardinals has, or the conclave, I should say, had didn't we all just learn that word recently? Um, but yeah, the conclave has elected a new pope, and so you know, outside the the whole world is just like. Just at a standstill with this shocking news. Um, and so um inside uh these two idiots are still um you know just clowning around. Um now outside uh on the balcony, Scotty can see Mika. Um, you know, he can see her walking around. So he like runs to the balcony. And as he's running out there in his haste to get to the balcony, he gets wrapped up in the curtains, like these fine uh silky curtains uh just like tie him up and he pulls them off uh along with the curtain rod. Once he gets outside of the basilica and into the like onto the edge of the balcony, he is completely like enfolded in the curtains, still wearing that stupid Pope hat, holding the curtain rod, standing on the edge of the balcony, everybody standing outside looks up, and someone shouts, It's the new Pope! And by God, it it certainly does look like he is the new Pope. So um, meanwhile, the real Pope is watching on TV, going, What's the hell? Um, it's you know, just fantastic. Um, but yeah, so he sees Mika and he uh tears off the fake Pope costume and slides down a banner and gets off of the balcony, down to the crowd, runs over to her, and he shouts, Mika, Mika, it's me. Um the Swiss guards threaten to stop him, but you know, obviously he's in big trouble, right? For a second, but uh thankfully his old buddies from Manchester United just again randomly show up. You know, this movie is full of just people randomly showing up, which you gotta appreciate about like a hard comedy, right? It's it doesn't take a lot of like leaps of imagination to be like, oh, okay, yeah, sure, why not? Um yeah, so they just come, they're just at the Vatican for no reason, and they just come and beat up the Swiss guard and and save his ass. But um, yeah, so he's saved by them, and he gets to talk to Mika, and uh and he's like, Oh, I'm I'm so sorry about that email, uh, but you know, I'm in love with you, and and she goes, she doesn't say anything. But then the next scene it cuts to them in a church confessional booth fucking their brains out. And uh yeah, it's this is I think I'm not sure if this was in the the theatrical version because I I didn't see it in the theater, but um it's most certainly in the the on-rated version, which it's it's quite a quite quite a graphic uh scene, both uh you know visually and also um just the con conceptually too, I guess. Um so that happens, uh, but they finish up somehow. And um after that's done, uh everyone's getting wrapped up. Uh Jamie, one of the twins, he ends up meeting Arthur Fromer, who wrote that guidebook, and Fromer offers him a job. Uh he was end was actually on the tour that uh Jamie was giving of the Vatican and was like, hey, I was so impressed by you. Why don't you come work for me? Again, fantastic. Couldn't have worked out better. So uh Jamie is gonna stay in Europe and Jenny, Cooper, and Scotty will all be heading back to America. Meanwhile, Mika is gonna complete her summer at sea, and Scotty says goodbye to her. Sadly, uh, they agree to keep writing to each other. So they get on the plane, and then Jenny and Cooper join the Mile High Club. Uh, they lament the fact that they are the only two people that didn't get to have crazy European sex, and so they uh cement their attraction to each other in the bathroom of the plane going home. Uh yeah, with Cooper going, this still counts as Europe, right? I guess that's the most important thing. But um, so the film concludes with uh leaping forward several months later. We see Scotty in his college dorm room. He's on the phone with Cooper, who is now dating Jenny. Although, you know, he's still being dictated about it, of course. He's like, oh Jenny who and Jenny's like, me, and hits him on the head. Good for you, girl. Um, and so they're waiting for Scotty's roommate to show up. Uh Scotty's on the phone, he's like, Yeah, I don't know when he's coming. Um, and then you know, suddenly there's a knock on the door, and who is it? But it's Mika. And Scotty's like, oh my gosh, what are you doing here? And she's like, I'm going to college. And he's like, Oh my gosh, what are you talking about? And she's like, They put me in this room. I guess, I guess they thought I was a guy. And the film ends with them kissing, and that's it. Elphine. Where are they now? Well, Scott Mecklowitz is still acting. He was in a movie in 2025. He posts a lot on Instagram about Eurotra, and this really lean is the into the iconic nature of the movie. He's a dad now. Uh so good for him. It seems like he's really thriving. Jacob Pitts got married to a Slovakian woman, and uh they lived together in Prague, which is so interesting. I mean, they had to have met or you know, connected at some point while he was making this movie. It just it just seems so logical. And Travis Wester, he's the actor that played Jamie, but he's a paralegal now. He works for a law firm that represents children's rights. And I just when I found that out, I was so that was just so touching. I mean, I I have to I can only imagine Jamie taking that kind of career pivot as well. You know, it's just I mean he was so like like mature and like adult and and detail oriented and and and compassionate too, right? You know, so like good for him. What a what a fantastic move to make in his life. Now, um, I said I was gonna talk more about Jessica Bors. Uh she's the actress that played that played Mika. Uh she's a German soap star and she's also a singer. Um, she her name is not spelled this way in the credits for Eurotrip, but uh she does spell her name with an omelot in some uh publications that I saw. And that actually made me think that there was a missed opportunity here that uh the Eurotrip they could have spelled it with an omlot, like over the O. So yeah, oh well, maybe for the sequel, but so um she uh I read an interview with her and uh she said that she started acting and singing when she was 13, and she got her first record deal when she was 16. Uh she sings for a group called Nova Space, which mostly covers 80s songs. So um I really like this quote from her. She said, uh, the greatest songs were written in the 70s and 80s. Teenagers who are like 12 to 13 years old don't even know these songs. I thought it'd be good to bring them back, but in a new style. So yeah, I mean, and so here I just want to play you like a little bit of um her music.

SPEAKER_03 51:47

Time after time if you fall I will catch you. Are we waiting? Time after time. If you lost, you can look and you will find it. Time after time. If you fall, I will catch you. I'll wait for it!

SPEAKER_01 52:14

Also, uh from the same interview. I thought this this kind of tickled me. Uh the interviewer asked her what American music she liked. And she says, I love the music of Erica Badu and Robbie Williams. I mean he's from the UK, but that's alright. I love him when he does live concerts. I like old stuff like Aretha Franklin and Al Green. I like anything. I was okay. Alright. That's really, really simple. She said, I was into Limp Biscuit once in my car. I I mean, wow, I I okay, like I know English is her not her first language, and and I'm I'm confident what she means is like, you know, she was probably driving her like in a front car or something, and um and what it came on and and and she was like, oh yeah, yeah, this is cool, but but it's just like it's just like a it's just such a funny way. Um you know, it just makes me think like heck if I just you know, get out of my dreams and into my car, like under my car. Um, but yeah, so so that's just the voice, and and that's that's a year trip, you guys. Uh, thank you so much for listening. Uh before I go, I just wanted to tell you a little bit about my Euro trip. Uh it's not nearly as exciting as this one, um, but I started abroad in 2007. I went in London, but I also traveled to Perth, Amsterdam, and Rome. Talking to Berlin or Barots that would come here. But um, it was you know, it was a fun time. And um, here's here's a picture of a little, if you're watching on YouTube, here's a here's a picture of a little baby in the chat. Uh, this is me in Venice. I was looking at a picture of me in Rome so I could match the movie, but no such luck. It's the best we can do. Uh, so here's me in Venice not worrying a pop outfit. Um, so thank you guys so much for listening. Have a great time. Um, if you have any questions or comments or you know, anything, please uh leave them here. And uh please listen, subscribe, rate, review, all that good stuff. I love y'all. Take care. Bye-bye.