Mr. Monk and the Red Headed Stranger

In this episode, Jen and Cathy dig into Mr. Monk Meets the Redheaded Stranger — the one where Willie Nelson becomes a murder suspect and Monk gets to play clarinet with his hero.

We are, again, so sorry this episode is late. We have had a loss in the family, so upcoming episodes will be hit or miss as we heal. Thank you for your love and patience. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:07

Welcome back to I Don't Give a Shalou. I'm Jen.

SPEAKER_02 0:10

I'm Kathy. And uh we're back. We we are back. We know you missed us.

SPEAKER_01 0:20

We were a little late on getting out our podcast. Do you want to tell us why it's your fault? Yes.

SPEAKER_02 0:27

I would love to. Guys, we only have Saturday and Sunday, like the majority of Americans. And sometimes we just can't fit in a podcasting session. Yeah. So last weekend, ooh, I can transition right into my monkey.

SPEAKER_01 0:44

Perfect. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 0:45

Uh last Saturday, I left the house and I went to a musical. Hell yeah, you did. I went and saw Le Miz, which was phenomenal. And the reason it's monking is that it took a lot of energy from my chronically ill body. Um, but I put on a dress, I did my hair, and I just went and enjoyed it. And it was really, really great. What was your favorite song or character? Eponine is my favorite character because I relate to her. Oh, because you're a French prostitute? I uh yes. Yes, I am. I am so glad you got that accurate. Um, but okay, so I came home and I was singing all the songs and my throat hurts because I'm just not trained to sing. And I you have Kathy has a beautiful voice. It's so kind. Yeah, I actually did this thing where you can test your vocal range using an app and it says I'm a mezzo. Oh, are you? And I don't know what that means.

SPEAKER_01 1:56

Neither do I.

SPEAKER_02 1:58

My reaction. Oh, okay. Interesting. Yeah. So anyway, that's my monking. I had a really great time, and it's why we are now off of our weekly schedule. My bad. No, totally worth it. Now, Jen, tell me about your monking.

SPEAKER_01 2:13

I didn't well, you know, this week I think I had a bug, but we all want to hear about your diarrhea. Anyway, on Tuesday, I was walking Kathy's parents' dog, and I just started to feel so awful. And his name is Hooper. He looked at me like, what is your deal? And I was like, We gotta go back. We gotta go back. And he wouldn't let me. We had to go around the block. He's a big, strong dog. Rude. But by the end, he was looking at me like, What's what's happening? Anyway, I never do this because I run my own business and it means money out of my pocket. And also I feel immense guilt taking time. But I texted all of my clients and just said, I can't come today. I'm sick. And they were all wonderful about it, of course.

SPEAKER_02 3:00

I am so proud of you for taking time for yourself and your gastrointestinal tract.

SPEAKER_01 3:07

I it really did take a lot because when you're feeling sick, you can still walk, but I couldn't. My body said no, and I listened. So that really is truly monking for me. It's not comfortable. I felt guilty, but I it was exactly what I needed. So good job, Jen. Well, I'm really proud of us too. Normally we struggle with the monk section, and we both we've been paying attention to how were we just great today. Yeah. I mean this week, and it came very easily. All right. So this week we got to watch season one, episode 11, Mr. Monk and the Red Headed Stranger. I didn't know that Willie Nelson was called the Redheaded Stranger.

SPEAKER_02 3:46

Me neither. I don't think of his hair as red. Well, that's because for at least a decade it has been grayed. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:54

So it was red pictures of it really being red. Maybe it was do you? Well, as in we see in this episode, it is beautifully red. It is, it is. So I did a little bit of research into Willie Nelson. Oh, actually, before I get into this, this is just really interesting to me. When they wrote this episode, they had a specific artist in mind that they wanted to use. Do you have any guesses? You already told me. Oh, I did. Okay. Ringo.

SPEAKER_02 4:21

Ringo Star. Oh, I couldn't remember. I was staring at you. I'm like, you told me, but I forgot. So tell me again.

SPEAKER_01 4:28

Yeah, it was Ringo Star. Why didn't they want Ringo? I don't know. Maybe it was cheap. He was probably doing Thomas the Train Engine at the time. But then they thought, ooh, having Ringo at the scene of an assassination outside by gunshot might be a little triggering for the nation. Yeah. So then they thought of James Taylor, and James Taylor was almost on board, and that would have been incredible. I love James Taylor. Fire and Rain would have been perfect because it's about loss, and if Monk played the clarinet to Fire and Rain, oh, gorgeous. But for some reason it didn't work out. And then Willie Nelson, who I guess does a lot of TV appearances, he surprised me with how good he was in this. He was very natural as an actor. He signed up and it was great. I enjoy Willie Nelson, but I was never a big fan. Definitely not like Monk. Do you have any history with Willie Nelson?

SPEAKER_02 5:26

I have no history with Willie. Well then let me just other than our common substance.

SPEAKER_01 5:31

Yeah. Oh yeah. Your common substance.

SPEAKER_02 5:35

The ganja. The ganja. Yeah. They like to smoke. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:40

That's the only thing I could think of. Me and Willie. So Willie Nelson was born in Abbott, Texas, in 1933 and was largely raised by his grandparents because his parents both left. His grandmother gave him his first guitar at age six and taught him basic chords, and he was performing in a local band by his early teens. He grew up dirt poor during the Depression era, which shaped the like, you know, his scrappy kind of hobo, self-reliant style. He moved to Nashville in early 1960, hoping to become a performer, but he was initially a songwriter. And there are other songs that I didn't recognize, but one of the things he wrote was Crazy, which Patsy Klein sings. Crazy. Yeah. That one? Sing it. No. Crazy for feelings. Yeah, okay. Lonely. Also, Hello Walls and Funny How Time Slips Away. Do you know those songs? No. I didn't either. Okay. Um, do you remember the IRS situation?

SPEAKER_02 6:40

No.

SPEAKER_01 6:40

Okay. People might I remember learning that his accountant stole all his money. And so I thought when they were doing this episode that they were weaving that in because they were first initially fighting about money. And I was like, oh, that's interesting. But it was kind of more nuanced. The short version is that the accountants at Price Waterhouse had been investing his money in tax shelters that the IRS ultimately ruled were illegal and left Willie Nelson on the hook for$16 million. Woo back in 1990s.

SPEAKER_02 7:12

If I could whistle, this is where it would go. Woo!

SPEAKER_01 7:14

Yeah, beautiful. Very nice. They seized his property and assets, and he responded by recording the IRS tapes album, which again I don't know anything about. He sold it directly to fans to pay off his debt. And then they auctioned off his items and his fans gave them back. They bought them and then just gave them back. So he's had a loyal fan base. So Monk's devotion to him is pretty authentic based off of the fan base. Yeah. I just thought that was nice. Yeah. So that's kind of all I've got. Do you have anything you want to add on Willie? Um, nothing. No. Okay. Then let's dive in. The episode opens up with a familiar little ditty. The camera moves up, and the familiar diddy pairs beautifully with a familiar voice and face. It's Willie Nelson. He sings On the Road Again in an easy high tenor. On the Road Again. Yes. Keep going. I do love that song.

SPEAKER_02 8:09

I have some facts about On the Road Again. Ready. On the Road Again was written and recorded by American country music singer, songwriter. Willie Nelson? Willie Nelson, yeah. Okay. Okay, so it's his song. Released in 1980 for the film Honeysuckle Rose. He famously wrote the lyrics in about 10 minutes on an airplane barf bag after being asked to create a theme song for the movie. Are you kidding? Isn't that awesome? That's amazing. That's like better than a bar napkin. A barf bag. A barf bag. I feel like that is very Kathy-esque to do a barf bag. So I feel very connected to him right now. It became a number one country hit and it reached number 20 on the Billboard Hot 100. Nice. And then it won a Grammy Award for Best Country Song.

SPEAKER_01 9:01

Really? Yeah. Isn't that great? All for 10 minutes of work.

SPEAKER_02 9:05

Well, you know, there's a Picasso anecdote, and I'm so sorry if I'm getting this wrong because it's something I've been told. While sitting in a cafe in Paris, Picasso is approached by a woman who asks him to do a quick sketch on a paper napkin. He agrees and he scribbles a drawing in a matter of minutes and hands it back, but asks for a massive sum of money. The punchline is that what the woman gasps, you know, like, what the hell?

SPEAKER_03 9:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:30

And uh he calmly replies, Well, it took me 40 years to draw that in five minutes. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:37

I love that story.

SPEAKER_02 9:38

So that's you know, Willie was able to barf bag in just a few minutes, but that's because he's a master at his art.

SPEAKER_01 9:46

And there is a skill to writing music, I guess. Oh, for sure. Um and who knows if that's true, but Willie's story is for sure true. I mean, I understand Picasso's thought process, but it is kind of a dick move. For sure. Okay. So a large Texan flag fills the entire back of the stage. Willie stops the song abruptly and edits the bandmates playing. They good naturally take the direction and all smiling begin to play again. The crew watch from behind, also smiling. The practice ends and Willie packs up. A man approaches, letting him know both the shows have been sold out and his driver has been given directions to the radio station for a scheduled interview. Off stage, a man wearing an oversized mustard shirt talks animatedly into his cell. Willie excuses himself and walks past the road crew to the mustard man. Mustard man? Mustard man.

SPEAKER_02 10:39

I like it.

SPEAKER_01 10:40

Keep going. Mustard man is tall, at least compared to Willie, who he towers over. He pockets his phone. Hey Will, sorry I'm late. How'd rehearsal go? Willie seeming both annoyed and concerned. Well, we managed to get by without you, yeah. Noticing the tone, mustard man, who is actually known as Jason Sunny Cross, asks something wrong? Yeah, something's wrong. Willie shoots back. Yeah, something's wrong. We're totally putting that in. Is it about the 400 from last night? No, it's about the 4,000. The books don't add up.

SPEAKER_02 11:15

It's much more than 4,000. He says something like 40,000? Okay, maybe I got it right. It's a big sum.

SPEAKER_01 11:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:22

You know what? No, no, no, you don't have to be able to do it.

SPEAKER_01 11:24

That is important, I guess. It is because I wrote 400,000. I'm just tired. And my eyes are weak. It was a huge sum. Sonny's eyes widen. He looks back at Willie guiltily. Can we uh go talk about this one on the bus? But Willie's like, no, we talk about it right now. Are you ripping me off? Is this a joke? The band members and stagehands start paying attention. No joke, Willie tells him Steely-eyed. You know I never do the books until I get back to Austin, Sonny tells him.

SPEAKER_02 11:52

Well, if the books don't add up today, you won't be going back to Austin.

SPEAKER_01 11:57

Willie tells him firmly, then walks away. In the next scene, a black car pulls up in front of the KNGY Energy Radio Station. A driver hops out and opens the black passenger side door where Sonny exits. He doesn't even acknowledge the driver, too busy talking frantically into his cell. At the door, he sees a piece of paper saying, J. Cross, use side door with an arrow. Ah jeez, he mutters. Inside, a little man sleeps peacefully.

SPEAKER_02 12:24

The little man. He is a little man. He's like a man. He's not the Lily Potion. Is that what they're called? I don't know where I whipped that out of.

SPEAKER_01 12:35

I have never heard that.

SPEAKER_02 12:36

Uh, didn't you read Gulliver's Travels? Like pushes. That's the little tiny people we're called. What a great little anecdote. Truly. I'll check it with my friend who's an English teacher, but I'm pretty sure that I got that right.

SPEAKER_01 12:49

Her friend who's an English teacher is the internet. Okay, so a big man sleeps peacefully on the couch. At the sound of a loud crack, he bolts up. He exits the side door where he sees Willie crouched over a body and another woman screaming her head off for help. Willie, hair unbraided, it's literally blowing in the wind.

SPEAKER_02 13:14

Yeah, I even put a note down. I'm like, this is a moment for his hair. Yeah. And that's when I looked up if his hair was still red, because I'm like, I don't remember his hair being red. And he's currently 93, by the way, and he has gray braids. Okay. He's 93. He is 93 now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:31

Holy moly. Good for him. Oh, do you remember this week when I came into Walksadie and you went, Dick Van Dyke is great? I went, what? Wait. You don't remember that? I think we have to give some context. So I walk in, it's probably 7:30 a.m. And I go to quietly get her dog, and Kathy turns to me and goes, Dick Van Dyke is great. And I went, what? I'm in bed. Yeah, she's asleep, but she turns to me and she goes, I love Dick Van Dyke. I was like, did he die? And he went, no, I just love him. I don't remember this. All right, I love him too. We all love Dick Van Dyke.

SPEAKER_02 14:14

He must have been in my dream or something.

SPEAKER_01 14:16

Yeah, that's what I assumed.

SPEAKER_02 14:17

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01 14:18

My face is hot from laughter. It was really funny.

SPEAKER_02 14:23

Um, all right, so and then Willie goes, Sonny's been shot.

SPEAKER_01 14:29

And then the napping man looks at our beautiful bard in horror. What did you do? Which is a little accusatory. And there's a woman yelling in the background. Screaming her head off. Yeah. All right. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say, I don't think Willie Nelson did it.

SPEAKER_02 14:46

I I think uh our uh our famous man probably did not do it.

SPEAKER_01 14:52

I mean, that would definitely be an interesting twist if they ended it with Willie Nelson going to life in prison.

SPEAKER_02 14:59

Yeah, that would be funny.

SPEAKER_01 15:02

All right. After the break, we're back in the alley, now full of cops and one very busy disher giving orders. At the opening of the alley, Monk and Shrona pull up. Shrona is chatting happily into her phone. We hear her side of the conversation, which went like this. I told you my hours were crazy, giggle. You know what? We just got to the crime scene. I'll call you later, okay? How late are you going to be? Giggle giggle. All right, okay. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Who was that? Monk asks as they slide under the police tape. Giggle gone. None of your business. Her little flirting face just gone. Yeah. Well, can I take a wild guess, Monk pushes? You never take a wild anything. Was it the guy you met at last week's party, Justin? Maybe, she consents. When do I get to meet him, Monk asks? Shoulders back, she whips to face him. Never, because you ruin everything. Monk's a bit offended here. I'm protecting you. Sharona sighs loudly and meaningfully. Adrian, you are not my mother. Look, I checked him out on the internet. He's an architect who's won awards. He's the real deal.

SPEAKER_02 16:09

And I am so surprised that she checked him out on the internet because, like, while this is early 2000s, I don't remember the internet being that good. It wasn't. But may maybe it's better than I remember.

SPEAKER_01 16:21

I doubt it. Also, it was Nary a week ago that she was nearly killed by a guy who says Nary. That is so true. And then she also back off. Yeah. Monk gives his most harmless face. So let me meet him. We'll invite you to our tenth anniversary, all right? Now, she gestures to the crime scene. Will you pay attention? There's a dead guy over there. A cop approaches Disher. Can we cut the witness loose? Yeah, Dish says. Then wait, wait. No, no, no, no, no, we better not. Another bee cop walks up. Sir, the building next door has a security camera. Maybe we could have a look at the tape? Yes. Good idea. Talk to the owner. Disher's eyes are huge, his brows are raised, fingers are pointed, and arm movements are wide. And the man is frassled. Everything has a frantic air about it. Wouldn't we need a court order for that? The beat cop asks. Right, Disher confirms. I uh I'll take care of that later. Monk Disher rushes forward. Where's the captain? Shrona asks. He's getting an x-ray. He uh was in an accident, Dish explains. Is he okay? Monk asks. He fell off his motorcycle, that's all I know. Until he gets back, I'm in charge. But then Monk, this is big. In fact, this could be the big one. We have a suspect inside. Dish pauses, looking at Monk meaningfully.

SPEAKER_02 17:46

And we see the bluest blue of his eyes. Yeah. Like really big, he looks at them.

SPEAKER_01 17:51

Yeah. It's Willie Nelson. The red-headed stranger. The press hasn't gotten wind of it yet, Dish tells him, panic spreading to his voice. So just but Monk is excited. Can I can I can I talk to him? Shirona's like, hold on a minute. You like Willie Nelson? Are you surprised? Monk asks. Oh yeah, she tells him. It's just so so normal. He's inside, Dish interrupts, and he's not talking to anyone until his lawyer arrives. Then if you want, you can meet his road manager. At this, Disher walks over to the body. Say hello to Sonny Cross. Disher shows them the note. We found this on the front door to lure him in the alley. What did the J stand for? Sharona asks. His legal name was Jason Cross, Disher explains as he pulls the covering sheet away. Look at this, shot one in the collarbone, shot two in the back as he was running away. Monk uses his pen to look at the wounds. We have a witness, Monk, who heard Willie Nelson and Cross arguing just before the shots were fired. We found the gun over there behind the dumpster. It's a Webley, a Mark 138 caliber. No prints. An old Webley? Monk repeats. Yes. And if we can rule out a mugging, Monk puts his right arm flat out in front of him. Then both arms at his side and up, like he's slow motion flapping. Disher looks at Sharona confused. What's he doing?

SPEAKER_02 19:14

I think he looks like he's directing air traffic. Very good, yeah. Think about him like just putting his arms out every which way.

SPEAKER_01 19:22

Yeah. Thank you. What are you doing? Sharona asks Monk. The bullet hole in the jacket lines up with the entry wound, Monk explains. So, says Disher. Well, you said they were arguing, Monk continues. If he was animated or he was gesturing, then the holes wouldn't match up. He looks at the body. No, this man's hands were down at his side. Monk puts his hands up in the universal don't hit me. He wasn't frightened either. He you said there was an eyewitness. Well, not exactly an eyewitness, Disher corructs. He points down to the alley. Her name is Wendy Mass. The camera pans to an older black woman with long gray curls and dark sunglasses. She's holding a walking stick. She's been blind since she was sixteen, Disher continues. She lives in one of those assisted living places in Mountain View. Oh my god, Sharona breaks in. I know her. Yeah, I've seen her in the park. That's your witness, Monk says. She said she heard the whole thing, Disher confirms. Inside the radio station, an arrow of a man faces Randy. Lieutenant, from here it looks like your hands are empty. The arrow says aggressively. Disher, who is in fact holding an evidence bag, looks at him confused. Excuse me, he questions. You're not holding a warrant, are you? Arrow asks. No, I'm not, Randy concedes. Then we're finished here. Arrow says to Willie and the other men in the room. But Disher, neither in command or confidence, is still wanting to do a good job for Daddy, and he spits out I need to stop calling Staldware daddy. I love it. He could be my daddy. I know. We all want a little stu stop it. So Disher spits out. I just want to make sure we have all the details. What more do you want? The lawyer asks. Our client has given you a statement. Monk and Sharona rush into the room. Willie cuts off his lawyer. Ah, it's all right, Josh. I'm as anxious to get this thing cleared up as you are. Monk enters the room with stars in his eyes. Disher continues questioning. Now, Mr. Nelson, you admit that you and Mr. Cross were arguing yesterday. We argued all the time, Willie replies, arms crossed. About what? Only two things to argue about, and money is one of 'em. What do you think the other one is? I wondered that. It's a woman.

SPEAKER_02 21:38

I was gonna guess.

SPEAKER_01 21:40

And you were coming here to do a radio interview, Disher continues. The arrow says, We've been over this. It's okay, Willie calms him. He's just doing his job. Look, Lieutenant, I got out of the car, heard some shots, I went around the corner into the alley, and Sonny was laying dead. I couldn't believe it. Monk and Sharana watched me. Intently. Was there anybody else in the alley? Disher asks.

SPEAKER_06 22:03

There was this lady with a cane. Uh she could have been blind. She was screaming at the top of her voice. She had a great set of lungs, I know that. Thank you very much. That's all I need for now.

SPEAKER_01 22:14

Monk moves next to Disher and gives a slight throat clear. Excuse me, Mr. Willie. Wilson. Nelson, he stumbles. I just have one question. Who the hell are you? I'm uh Adrian Monk, Monk says. And what department are you with? Mr. Monk isn't on the force, Disher tells him. He's here as a consultant at my request. Monk turns again. First off, he gives a small smile. I just want to say I'm your second biggest fan. I love that. Well, who's the first? That would be my wife, Monk tells him. I lost her about five years ago. I'm sorry to hear that, Mr. Monk, Willie says. I just wanted to tell you how much your music has meant to me and my wife. This your rolls his eyes. Adrian, this isn't a fan club. Sharona interrupts. Just ask your questions. Right, Monk agrees. Then how long did you know Jason? Willie looks around confused. Who the hell is Jason? Uh, I'm sorry. I meant Sonny, Monk crux. I forgot his real name, Willie said. About eighteen and a half years on and off. Wow. Mostly off. It's a long time to know someone. I know. I've known you for sixteen.

SPEAKER_02 23:26

Yeah. Wow, good math. Well, it's easy because it was 2010. Enough is enough.

SPEAKER_01 23:32

He ushers Willie out. You know where to reach us. Let's all just give a round of applause for Kathy. That's the arrow.

SPEAKER_02 23:39

I don't like being so mean. Okay. I would you like to do Sharona in a shirt? I am excellent. I don't know if I could do a good jersey. Well, I don't do jersey. No, sometimes you do a good jersey. Do I? Yeah. I try not to do major accents. Like you're it's a mimicking of Sharona more than a jersey accent. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:58

Okay. With the room clear, Monk turns to Lieutenant. Randy, you got a second what? Annoyed Randy snaps. Monk shows him the sign. Look again. J Cross. Randy looks. Whoever wrote this knew Sonny by his legal name, Monk explains, not his nickname. So? Disher says. I don't think Willie did it. Monk, she was shot twice, Disher counters. Once in the back, twenty feet away. It wasn't the blind lady. Monk looks away thinking, then there must have been someone else in the alley. At the police station, the blind woman is being interviewed by Disher, Sharona, and Monk. Now, misses Mass, Disher starts. You said you were taking the bus. That's right, she confirms quietly. I was visiting a friend and missed my stop. I never like to admit it, but it happens. So I got off and I we see Monk shift his focus to the desk, to three pencils on the desk to be specific. The offending pencils have the nerve to be multiple lengths. Mm-mm. He clenches his jaw and shrugs his shoulders, and you can just feel the itching discomfort. Wendy continues, I turned out of the alley thinking I could cut through it to Fourth Avenue, but it was blocked off. Both Disher and Sherona respond at the same time. Well the alley was, Disher tries, just as Sharona louder confirms. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There was construction. It was a dead end. A dead end, exactly, Wendy agrees. So I started to turn around and then I heard these two men arguing. Monk is still staring at the pencils. Uh about what? He asks, moving toward the desk. I uh couldn't tell, Wendy says. They were very angry. Monk stealthily grabs a pencil and slides it into an electric sharpener, and it whines. Shrona and Disher look, but Wendy No, that's perfect. You're setting the scene. Shrona and Disher look annoyed, but Wendy continues. And then I heard these two shots. Bang, bang. Monk replaces the pencil, then cocking his head, I'm measuring. Well, my heart was pounding. I couldn't move. He picks up the remaining two toolkits. And then this one man came up to me and he said the pencil sharpener wars in front of us. Tell anybody about this and I'll kill you. The pencil sharpener whirs again, and now they're all at the same length. How's it going? Staldemeyer says, entering the room with his usual swagger, and a cast on his right arm. Miss Mash, Disher says, This is Captain Staldemeyer. Disher continues. He'll be in charge of the case from here on in. Thank God, he says under his breath. Good job, Lieutenant Staldemeyer shakes Disher's hand with his left hand. He continues to shake everybody's hands. Sherona, the captain greets her. Hey, are you okay? she asks, gesturing to the cast. Yeah, I'm fine. Sherona explains for Wendy. His arm is in a sling. Oh, sorry, Wendy tells him. What happened, Sherona demands. It's nothing, Stademeyer chuckles, embarrassed. I fell off my motorcycle. I was on the first trails north of Highway 18. Slipped on a bunch of wet leaves. Monk is still doing that tight necked everything is itchy and I'm trying not to scratch face. It could have been a lot worse, Disher tells everyone. You're a very lucky man, sir. Yeah, well, I don't feel like a lucky man. He pulls Disher close. It's a feeding frenzy out there. We've got to be very careful how we handle this one. Sharona approaches Wendy, who is listening closely. She crouches next to her and whispers, Are you okay? Wendy nods. So what's the plan? Disher asks, pouring coffee. Well, you know how they handled the OJ case down in LA? So I was thinking this is 2002. OJ was I know it ended in 99 because we were in typing class when the OJ verdict was given, and half of the class erupted in cheers with the not guilty. And I didn't know what to think because I was sh very sheltered.

SPEAKER_02 27:58

Do you remember the OJ verdict? Um, I don't remember the verdict. I remember the trial happening. Okay. Because I remember being at my aunt's house and her crushing. Okay. And she watched it all live. And she watched the whole thing religiously.

SPEAKER_01 28:13

I would now. I love public court cases. Yeah, you do. I really do. Yeah. Um, okay. Well, anyway, so Stut says, Well, you know how they handled the OJ case down in LA? We do the opposite. He's holding a beautiful glazed donut that I really wanted in that moment. Oh. Then he asks, Where are we? Dish your hands the captain the coffee. The same as I told you on the phone, sir, Mrs. Mass is reasonably sure that she can recognize the assailant's voice. Reasonably sure? Stott repeats, then turning to the woman, much louder, says, Excuse me, Mrs. Mass, do you listen to country and western music? No, I like classical. Okay, good, Stotelmeyer says through a mouthful of glaze. Bring him in. Like that's enough. Like she really doesn't know who Willie Nelson is. Everyone knows who Willie Nelson is.

SPEAKER_02 29:01

You may not know his music. Yeah. But you know the name. Yeah, and his voice is very distinctive.

SPEAKER_01 29:09

Well, his singing voice is a high tenor. Oh. Maybe a meso tenor since we don't know what meso means. Munk walks over to the captain and says quietly, uh, Captain, I wouldn't tell about your accident to too many people. Stop frowns. Why not? Well, the hills north of Highway 18 have been closed for two weeks, he says apologetically. Brush fires. Monk nods, then what really happened? Under his breath, I was cleaning my gutters and I slipped, fell off the ladder. Ouch, Monk breathes. We're ready, sir, Disher announced. The door opens and a guitar twangs. That's one of my favorite parts of this episode. Whenever Willie Nelson is on screen, we get a big twang. An officer guides a line of men in, including Willie. Wendy is placed at a desk facing the lineup wall. Now I want you to take your time, Stadelmeyer tells her. Listen very carefully, okay? I wrote, she's blind. Of course she's gonna listen carefully. I'm ready, she tells him. Stott asks each man to step forward and say, Tell anybody about this and I'll kill you. Tell anybody about this and I'll kill ya. The first two men get a nope from Miss Mass. When it's Willie's turn, he kind of winces and approaches slowly. Tell anybody about this and I'll kill ya, he says. Predictably, Wendy gets animated. Pointing at the voice, she says, That's him. That's him, oh my god. Poor baby. Monk stares at her and we get another twang. You sure? Stadlemeyer asks. And Wendy is she's louder and more animated than we've ever seen her before. That's him, that's the man. Monk bows his head and Stadlmeyer's full cheeks exhale. This is not going to be fun. At a press conference, Stadlmeyer addresses the reporters. This investigation is open and ongoing. We have at least one witness and there is some physical evidence, which is being analyzed as we speak. Captain, is Willie Nelson a suspect? A reporter asks. We haven't ruled anybody out as of yet, that's all I can say. Has Mr. Nelson made a statement? Another asks. Mr. Nelson has been very cooperative. He's agreed to stay in town and remain available to us out of discretion. Stademeyer continues. Now I want to stress this again. We have not accused or charged anyone with this crime. Just then a naked man woo-hoos loudly and prances behind Stademeyer.

SPEAKER_02 31:39

The crowd laughs. I also got naked for that moment, guys. Yes, she did.

SPEAKER_01 31:43

Arms above her head. She's just running around. Just running around. What the hell was that? Stademeyer growls to Disher. That was a streaker, sir, Tisher explains. What is this? 1974? Then back to the reporters. I don't know that reference, do you? Maybe there were more streakers during that time, during the 70s. I mean, so I think what they're doing is like, because this is Willie Nelson, maybe the fans are more around and you're more likely to see streakers. I don't know. It was an interesting choice for the episode. Back to the reporters who are still giggling and filming the man. They are. They're all like the cameras all move from doing it. Like, oh my God, someone who's naked. Look at him, look at him. Well, if there are no further questions, we'll be going. Thank you. Back at the radio station, Monk and Sharona wait outside. Monk is hyperventilating. I can't believe he called me, he pants. Willie Nelson called me. Okay, Sharona says, grabbing his arm. Will you relax? He's just a regular guy who happens to sing and play guitar. No, he's not, Monk snaps, angrier than I've ever seen him. You take that back. She's shocked, but luckily, before more words can fly back and forth, a car rolls down the street. Okay, okay, Monk shouts, here he comes. But it's not the right car. Next, a huge bus pulls up, and Monk is irate. Excuse me, he pounds on the side. It's not bus stop, then roaring, We're waiting for Willie. The bus door opens, and who should be there? A one smiling Willie Nelson. Hello, Mr. Monk, he says kindly. Sorry we're late. Come on in. Sharona pats Monk on the chest, and they head onto the bus. Thanks for coming, Willie says, sitting down. My lawyer tells me you're the only friend I got in this town. Monk ignores the comment. Do you smell that? Willie looks around. I'm sorry, no, I don't. And uh neither do you. And I wrote, something tells me it might smell a bit like your house right now.

SPEAKER_02 33:52

My house doesn't smell in the mornings, does it? No. Um, definitely smells in the afternoons and evenings. Sorry about that.

SPEAKER_01 33:59

This is a little bit of Texas on wheels, Willie tells them. I love it. Monk breathes. It's the bomb. It's the bomb, Sharona repeats. Monk leans over, whispering in her ear. The bomb is good. Then focusing back on his hero, Monk hands Willie an album. Where'd you get that? Willie says delightedly. I haven't seen that one in a long time. I have them all, Monk fawns handing him a pen. And if you could just just make it out to Trudy, she worshipped you. So Willie Nelson does. On our first date, we went to one of your shows. It was at the Shoreline Amphitheater, Monk tells him.

SPEAKER_02 34:40

So it's cool for us because we live right by the Shoreline Amphitheater.

SPEAKER_01 34:45

Have you ever been to a concert there?

SPEAKER_02 34:47

Oh yeah. I've been to a ton of all of my early concerts were there. There's a handful of shows that I wanted to go to in the past few years, but now that I'm in a wheelchair, I I can't go unless I buy wheelchair tickets. And they are a fortune because they are in the seated section, which is a fortune. And the thing about this amphitheater, guys, is that it has a lawn where you could get really cheap lawn seats. And that really is the best place to sit because you get a blanket or you get like you could get bring a lawn chair if you want, but you sit under the stars and listen to your music. It's wonderful.

SPEAKER_01 35:26

It's the b that's why I've seen so many concerts there because you just go get lawn seating. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:32

It's but I can't do that now. I'm sorry. I'm thinking maybe I could have you drag me on a blanket? Yeah, just drag me. Mumford and Sons, but I would really like to go. I love Mumfort and Sons.

SPEAKER_01 35:47

Okay, we could get Ben to carry you. Yeah, because they're coming the summer, late summer. Oh, that would be fun. Okay, we'll think about it. Okay. We'll think about logistics. But this might change your mind. Do you know anything about Shoreline? No. I didn't either. And I'm very excited to tell you. Okay, go on. Before it was an iconic concert venue, Shoreline was a swampy marsh that nobody could use. Oh. You know those swampy marshes on the way to San Francisco? Yeah, the Baylands is what they're called. So the city spent 13 years literally filling it with garbage. They took the garbage from San Francisco City and Mountain View and the other Bay Area areas and filled it with garbage.

SPEAKER_02 36:25

You know, that makes total sense because there are Baylands and there are also garbage processing facilities in the Baylands. Um I used to hike a lot within the Baylands because there's lots of beautiful wildlife there. Um I'm not shy.

SPEAKER_01 36:45

They don't leave it there, they process it.

SPEAKER_02 36:47

Yeah. They're leaving it there.

SPEAKER_01 36:49

They are pulling it's a landfill essentially. Yes. So thousands of tons a day until it was solid enough to build on. They capped it with clay and then built the whole park on top. So the trash never left. It's still there.

SPEAKER_04 37:07

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 37:08

Um, and in the first year of it being a concert venue, it almost burned completely down because the methane from the decomposed was filtering through the clay and through the grass. And someone lit, you know, lighters. Yeah. And there were mini fires all over because it was all methane.

SPEAKER_02 37:26

Okay, I promise I won't bring a lighter, I'll bring a vape.

SPEAKER_01 37:29

How about that? They fixed it. Okay. They relayed the lawn, and Shoreline is a legend. It's one of the most well-known concert venues now. Yeah. But I had no idea. Isn't that incredible? That has a little bit of a gross feel to it. It does. Yeah. If Monk knew that, so Monk is saying that one of their first dates was at Shoreline. And they were sitting. Can you imagine Monk knowing that he was sitting on top of trash?

SPEAKER_02 37:51

He never would have. Okay, one more cool Shoreline thing. So I lived near it for a while. And I could hear it with the windows open. So for some reason I remember Steve Miller band and I remember them playing The Joker and just being by my window. It was really cool to be able to hear from my window. The sound didn't travel well always, but some nights it came through really clearly. That's incredibly bad. That's so nice.

SPEAKER_01 38:19

So now that we've given you a good rundown of Shoreline, where their first date was, Willie looks up and says, Yeah, I remember y'all. You were sitting on this blue blanket. Monk is shocked. Really? No, I'm just kidding. Willie smiles. They all have a big laugh. The bus lurches. Hey, the bus is moving, Monk says, suddenly nervous. Yeah, it does that, Willie says. Sit down. So they do. The bus takes them to a barbecue. A large group of people mill about, meet cooks and get slathered. Monk and Sharona stand behind Willie while he plays poker. I'm starting to get a little annoyed. I don't care who you are. If you've asked me to help solve the case where you might go to jail for murder, could we get started immediately?

SPEAKER_02 39:01

Yeah, they're relaxing quite a bit. I don't want to be tired out from being forced to socialize with strangers. I think it looks like a good time. Except I would like a vegetarian barbecue, but that's okay. Grill out. We should call it a grill out if it's Vegetarian.

SPEAKER_01 39:18

Vegetarian. Okay. So they're at the barbecue. Monk does some fancy monking about poker and shows off his stuff. And Willie says, You know more about me than I do. Sharona laughs. He knows more about everybody than they do. Well, he says, Why do you think I shot Sonny? Finally getting down to business. Sherona speaks up first. Um, well, you gotta admit it looks pretty bad. The blind lady said she heard everything. Willie's brows furrow, side eyeing. The blind woman is lying. But Sharona's like, really? Why would she lie? I do a lot of things, Willie tells them, but I wouldn't hurt anybody. You know, I might write a bad song about them or something, but as far as Sonny was concerned, maybe I should have fired him a long time ago. He looks around, but there's a bunch more I could have fired too. Monk looks past Willie, pointing. Is that a rosewood? The camera moves to where he's pointing. It's a clarinet. Yeah, Willie confirms, you play? Ah, little. Sherona's quick to correct. He's being modest. He's very good. Never played a rosewood clarinet, Monk says longingly. That is a beautiful thing. Well, come on over and kick the tires, Willie tells them. Monk's panic visibly rises. He looks at Sharona for help, which she does immediately. Um yeah, Willie, Adrian can't play somebody else's instrument. He uh has a little problem with germs. Willie is a gentleman. He pulls out a brand new mouthpiece, untouched by human lips. Monk secures the new mouthpiece on the clarinet and then Monk brings it to his mouth.

SPEAKER_02 40:56

So I have some grievances with this scene. Yeah, please. I love it from a let's get Monk playing. Yes, but it just doesn't work that way. What do you mean? Well, I don't know about a clarinetist, but a trumpeter doesn't like you may have extra mouthpieces on them. Oh. But the likelihood of it being a new mouthpiece versus different for different functionality, I don't I don't know about woodwind. Let's say there is a new mouthpiece. They are skipping over that there's this um woodpiece that you put in the mouthpiece called a reed, and you have to wet a reed before you can play because that's what makes it vibrate.

SPEAKER_01 41:41

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 41:41

And so you generally suck on the reed for a little bit before you place it, or you could put it in a little cup of water to keep it wet. Okay. So they're kind of like pretending that doesn't exist for Goddess scene. Okay. So you you have to do a little prep before you could start playing a wet water. I I have I have some insight.

SPEAKER_01 42:03

Well, he plays beautifully, and Willie Nelson agrees. Do you know Georgia on my mind? Oh sure. Tomorrow night we're doing this radio concert. My agent thought it might be a good idea for publicity or whatever, Willie tells them. Then he invites Monk to join them. Play with you and the band? Yeah, think about it, Willie tells them. No, no, I better not. If I think about it too much, I might say no. It's the cutest. It really is.

SPEAKER_02 42:30

Um, but I do have some news for you. News? Bad news? So in the first episode, I'm pretty sure I told you that Tony Shaloub plays the Fairnet. I lied. Oh. Um, he doesn't play it in real life, but he learned to place this simple line that's you know, he learned to place it enough to play in the episode of Monk, like this this scene. Wow. And um, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:00

That's really kind of disappointing. I'm so sorry. No, it's okay. I'm sure all the monk savants were like, he doesn't really play. So now we've corrected that. At Sharona's, Monk is practicing Georgia on my mind over and over and over, and Benji is glaring. Honey, do your homework, Sharona tells him. I can't concentrate, he says, frustrated. Sharona sighs, I know, but he has to practice. He's gonna be on the radio with Willie Nelson. Who's Willie Nelson? He's a country singer, she explains. Has he ever been on MTV? No, but he's been on the news. What for? he asks. Well, according to the IRS, when he was a little boy, he didn't do his math homework. Benji switches gears. Did you really meet a blind lady? Yeah. Did she have a dog? No, she had a cane. Hey, Benji says, lighting up. Maybe I can interview her for a report I have to do about people with disabilities. Possibilities. I thought you were gonna write about her eyes move pointedly towards Monk. Now, Ben, she tells her, grinning, it has to be two pages. Mr. Monk is a whole book. The phone rings and it's Stadelmeyer. He needs them at the station, which is where he waits, sitting seriously on the couch. Close the door, he tells Disher. Then to all three, what you're about to see cannot leave this room. The tabloids would pay a million dollars for this tape. Disher puts a VHS into the machine, and the nostalgia is so real. I miss VHS machines a little bit. It's from the surveillance camera from the crime scene, he continues. Disher presses play and they watch an aerial view of the alley. Disher continues to narrate. Bottom line, Stuttlemeyer adds, we can tell for sure who was there and who was not there. Monk is listening, but also not. What are you doing? Stuttelmeier demands. Oh, uh he's practicing, Sharon explains. Willie Nelson invited him to sit in with the band. Well, it may be live from Folsom Prison, the captain quips, moving towards the TV. Check this out. Disherpress's play. We see Mrs. Mass walk down the alley using her cane. She walks out of sight. Then we see Sunny Cross. He walks out of sight. Then Willie Nelson runs down quickly. Out of sight. No one else goes in or out. Pretty much a slam dunk, Leland tells them heavily. Are you gonna arrest him? Sherona asks. The DA is ready to move. I'm waiting for some tests from the lab. Maybe tomorrow. Then he twinkles at Disher. Call your mom. Tell her to set the VCR. We're going to be on the six o'clock news. Monk turns to him now, unconvinced. Captain, what about the note on the door? My videotape beats your note, ask any lawyer. And I'm pulling my hair out here. Did they check Willie or Wendy's hands for GSR? Gunshot residue? Oh yeah. Who does the gun belong to? Can we please check out the witness?

SPEAKER_02 46:01

Yeah. Sometimes the work on this show is so elementary and skips so many like obvious things. It is painful. Yeah. But I don't care. I love it anyway.

SPEAKER_01 46:14

It's a simple, friendly show. I've just watched too much CSI and like GSR is really important. Monk is with me. Hands together, he shakes his head. I don't know. But the captain is, Monk, look. My heroes have always been cowboys too. It's either A, the blind woman who has zero motive, or it's B. How do we know she has zero motive? I know. Okay, I'm sorry. That's why you check out both people in the alley. Just because she's blind, you know, like they're very quick to dismiss.

SPEAKER_04 46:42

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 46:43

Um or it's B, your buddy, the redheaded stranger.

SPEAKER_05 46:47

Who had motive, means, and opportunity and was identified by the only witness at the scene.

SPEAKER_01 46:52

A or B, Monk, the cap asks. Monk squints, thinking, I think it's C. And the captain's like, What? C? What the hell is C? Monk looks down, again, taking hold of his imaginary clarinet. I don't know yet, he says, beginning to practice again. We jump to a grocery store where Monk and Shrona follow Mrs. Mass. She's pushing a shopping cart down one of the aisles. Shrona talks to Wendy. So he just wants to ask you a couple of questions. And Wendy's like, Yeah, I don't mind. I love children. Monk's behind them counting cereal boxes. 431. 431 cereal boxes. That's a prime number. Then a lady walks by him and grabs a box, and Monk throws his hands up. Like, come on. Now, is there anything else you need? Sherrona asks Wendy. Mushroom soup, she says, which is in the next aisle. Um, misses Mass, Monk trouts beside her. I have a few questions. How did you know the alley was there? Well, I have a lot of friends in that neighborhood. I've lived in San Francisco for seventeen years, she explains. Monk watches as she says. The soup should be right here. Sharona grabs it for her. As she grabs some apple juice, Monk continues, misses Mass, are you sure there was no one else in the alley? Maybe someone hiding behind the dumpster. She shakes her head. Well, I didn't hear anybody, and I don't sense anybody, and I'm not easy to fool. Then facing him, Mr. Monk, I'm sorry about Willie Nelson. I'm sure he's a very talented singer. But I was there, and he did it. She's certain. Back in the alley, Monk pulls out a dart gun. Where'd you get that? Shrona asks. I borrowed it from Benji. Monk tells her. Deadly serious then. Okay, this is where it happened. So I'm the killer. Your sunny cross. Okay, I'm hiding. He kind of shivers. Oh, there's a lot of garbage back here. But he gets through it and bends down behind the dumpster. Okay, I'm hiding. You walk up the alley, I jump out, I step up to you, and bam, he shoots her with a dart. Ow, Sharonda shouts. Why am I always the victim? Because the victim usually ends up on the ground, in in the dirt, he mumbles. And I'm I'm me. She grits her teeth. Okay, Monk continues. Now you've been shot and you run away. With pleasure, she deadpants. So Sharonda starts running down the alley and Monk shoots her again with a dart. Ow, she shouts even though it was so far away, I doubt it really even grazed her. You know what? She angry mom marches towards him. Gimme that gun. She grabs the gun from Monk, who's still thinking. Okay, the first shot was point blake. Even the blind woman could have done that one. But the second shot, he walks down the alley. The second shot a moving target twenty feet away? Impossible, he frowns. Sherona watches him and throws her arms up, pointing to the obvious. So it had to be Willie Nelson. Monk looks again Monk looks around again, all furrowed. I don't think so. Then what do you think? Sherona asks him. I think we need to learn more about Sunny Cross. At a record store, Monk frantically organizes records while Sherona casually flips. Someone at the front desk is bartering. Goldmine has it for$40 in better condition. The owner pulls the record back. Then go to gold mine. Then go buy it from gold mine, waving to the door. Go on, leave. Then, since the buyer has not moved, he menaces. Why are you still in my store?

SPEAKER_02 50:23

Can you imagine being treated that way at a store?

SPEAKER_01 50:27

Oh my gosh. I wrote, This guy is a star. I love him immediately. And then I wrote, he might be the killer because I thought he was such a good actor. I loved him so much. So he's kind of a stocky man with a receding hairline and a small goatee. Maybe in his late 40s, he wears nice square glasses and a gorgeous maroon blazer, and I just really like him. Back in the record station, look at all these plastic bags, Sharona chuckles. You must be in heaven, because all the records are in plastic bags.

SPEAKER_02 50:55

She turned to tell me that as if I haven't watched the show a million times.

SPEAKER_01 51:00

Well, I just meant it would be really important to Monk.

SPEAKER_02 51:03

Yeah, it's really important.

SPEAKER_01 51:04

Monk flips in disbelief. I've never heard of these bands. Sharona looks at him. Really? You've never heard of the Ramones? To which he says Oh yeah, the Ramones.

SPEAKER_00 51:15

Yeah, they're great. I love that song they do about loving that woman all night long.

SPEAKER_01 51:18

That song they do. The owner marches up to Monk. Look, if you must manhandle, at least put things back where they came from. He air pushes Monk out of the way. I think I I think I did, Monk responds. No, you put things back alphabetically, he snips. But there happens to be a chronological suborder. Now I have to do the whole section. Thank you very little. Monk kind of just stares off. I think he's a little impressed. He's like, oh my god, a new organization system? Still, without a name, my new favorite character continues. So you want to know about Sunny Cross. Hmm? He pulls out a record. Well, he managed these guys for a while back in 87 until they fired him. Why? Sharona asks. Same reason as these guys, he pulls out another record. Fired him in 82. He hands the record to Monk. He was humping he was humping the lead singer's wife, he smarks. That cat had nine lives. He turns to a display wall. Oh, he managed these guys for a while as well. Monk looks down. They fired him. Store owner confirms, didn't have a choice. Hard to handle them from Florida State prison. He did two years, I think, drinking and driving. Apparently he killed a guy. And now he's been immortalized as the man Willie Nelson shot. Monk interrupts the album sorting. You missed one. I didn't, the owner huffs, but Monk points, Oh, you're right. Sharona watches them both all fast. Are you two related? And they respond in unison. Why would you say that? Nice little twins moment.

SPEAKER_03 52:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 52:54

So the actor from this incredible scene is named Ian Heath, and he's not very active, and I think he was like a child actor. Either way, he was amazing, and the character deserved a name. They didn't even give this character a name.

SPEAKER_02 53:06

I wonder if he knows someone and they like he's not an active actor, but okay, I'll do this scene.

SPEAKER_01 53:14

But really, Sean. I loved him. Back at the police station, Disher walks purposefully into the captain's office, holding a manila envelope. Excitedly, Sir, are you ready for this? Stademeyer is shaving in front of a mirror, and he says dryly, What is this, a game show? Can't you just walk in here and say what you have to say?

SPEAKER_02 53:33

I just think it's a little rude. Randy is always like, Are you ready to hear this? Yeah, that's right.

SPEAKER_01 53:38

You need to sit down.

SPEAKER_02 53:39

I have something to tell you.

SPEAKER_01 53:40

He's trying to make police work exciting. Disher, looking properly chagrined after his little spanking. Aww. Loses the smile, but continues to give the information. The droplets on Willie Nelson's jacket are human blood from the victim. And I said, but he was the one who found Sonny. Yeah, we all know that he like grabbed him and like tried to rescue him or whatever. Shared DNA. Stadelmeyer agrees with me. Well, he leaned over the body. Maybe he got blood on him. But Disher is like, Nuh-uh, the lab is 40% sure they're splatter marks from the actual shooting. And I wrote, wasn't blood splatter evidence debunked? And it was. 40%, Stadelmeyer repeats. What do you think? Disher says, nearly hopping. Well, I think it's not exactly through the hoop, no, is it? Thank you, Captain My Captain, for pursuing more ample evidence. It might be because the suspect is uber famous, but I like my detectives thorough. Okay, the blood is forty percent, Dish concedes. Then videotape? Leland thinks forty eight percent. Voice ID, Randy pushes fifteen percent. Motive twenty percent. Well, that's like one hundred and twenty three percent, Randy says, satisfied. I mean plus means and opportunity. The captain is still not sure. Looking down he sighs deeply. All right, bring him in. So dish dashes. Stodemeyer looks down at the evidence. I'd have to be crazy. Plum out of my mind to arrest Willie Nelson, which are exact lyrics from Willie Nelson's song. I'd have to be crazy. At a radio station, DJ Kenny Friedman is doing his DJ thing. We're back, he says, and I'm little Kenny Freeman. You're listening to three chord Monty on KNGY. We are very excited to have live in our studio the legendary Willie Nelson. We see Willie sitting with his guitar ready to play. The DJ continues, I know we've been reading a lot about Willie in the papers. Everybody seems to have an opinion on the incident. At incident, he air quotes. Just mild air quotes for a murder. And it's obviously a radio station, so they can't hear air quotes either. But tonight we're gonna forget all about that and enjoy the music. Willie, would you like to introduce the band? So he introduces the band. And as he's doing so, Monk watches smiling. He's given an instruction about how close to be to the microphone, and to show him, the guy puts the mouthpiece on his mouth. He licks his lips and then points the tell him what he's doing.

SPEAKER_02 56:16

Okay, so in order to just like how I get too close to the mic constantly, this dude is like showing a monk how close to get to the mic. But he takes his instrument and he shows him how close the instrument should be to the mic. But the weirdest thing he does is he puts his mouth on the instrument like he's gonna play it. That would never happen. This scenario is dumb. It really annoys me. It makes me so mad. If anyone ever held my trumpet, first of all, I would be like, get your hands off my instrument. You could show someone how close to stand to the mic without touching their instrument. And then to put your mouth on it, no. So this is just a silly little scene. I want you to calm down. It is okay. We can all, we're okay. It's okay. Basically, me. And I'm okay, Kathy.

SPEAKER_01 57:18

It's gonna be okay. Thank you. Brilliant. So I think of this. Sometimes I think of the writers as gods. They are gods and they're playing with the little characters, and they're like, How do we destroy Monk's day today? And Kathy's. And Kathy's. I agree. This is unlikely, and it's horrible, and it's horrible to watch. So the guy hands the clarinet back to Monk, and Monk is horrified, and so am I, and so is Kathy. And we look at Sherona, whose jaw is on the floor. Willie begins singing Georgia on my mind. Sherona tries to get them to stop, but it's live, so she just mouths play to Adrian. His neck is tight and he licks his lips, and the music continues slow, wandering, easy, but pressure is building anyway. It's very opposite of the music. You can see Monk just vibrating with stress while the song itself is so slow and beautiful. The pressure is building as we get to Monk's solo. He wipes the clarinet mouthpiece on one of the guitarist's shirts, which I also thought was gross. And he looks at Sherona and Willie calls him in. He leans towards the mouthpiece and tries to blow into it without touching. And then, well, just listen.

SPEAKER_06 58:35

Play it, Ada. Georgia.

SPEAKER_01 58:52

Willie, rolling with it, keeps playing, but man, this is awful. The shame emanates off him like sour sweat, which I bet he's drenched in as well. To make matters worse, Stademeyer and Disher are watching just outside the studio. The band is real sweet to Monk. No shaming or judging. I know.

SPEAKER_02 59:12

I am so happy about that. There's no one's like, what the hell? Yeah, what happened?

SPEAKER_01 59:19

And Monk is grateful and he's like, anything, anything he can do for them, just ask. But just then the captain and lieutenant enter with a couple uniforms. Willie Nelson, Stoldemeyer says, but the band members all speak before he I'm Willie Nelson. I'm Willie Nelson. I'm Willie Nelson. But it doesn't work. Disher handcuffs him and Monk's face falls. Captain, this is a mistake, he says. He is not the guy. But Stademeyer's like, you can't be objective. You're a member of the damn band. In front of the station, a huge line of protesters march in front of a press conference. As you know, Willie Hugh Nelson was arrested at 10 15 PM last night. He will be indicted in Judge Hackman's courtroom tomorrow. Captain Stodelmeyer was the arresting officer and would be happy to answer any of your questions. Stodlemeyer approaches the podium. First of all, I'd like to thank the members of my department that have been investigating this case. They've done an outstanding job. A tiny smug smile taps Disher's face. Captain, a reporter jumps in. How strong is your case against Willie Nelson? We would not have authorized this arrest, he says confidently, unless we are certain that we have all the facts for the district attorney to successfully prosecute. As he's speaking, naked streaker jogs up again and steals the show. All the reporters turn. Covering the mic, Staldemeyer growls to Disher. I want him. Go, go. Disher and a couple officers race after the Streaker down the street and alleyway. He's chuckling the whole time, and then a black and white pulls up blocking his route. He's cuffed. Streaker in custody, Dish pants into his walkie-talkie. At Mrs. Mass's house, Benji conducts an interview. Her sunglasses are off here, and she has beautiful dark brown eyes. I've never been interviewed before, she tells the boy. I feel like a celebrity. Are you ready? Benji shouts. I'm clicking on the tape recorder. Benji, you don't have to shout. My hearing is fine. Benji smiles, then begins his questions. Monk paces in the background. Have you always been blind? Well, I could see until I was sixteen years old. I was in a car accident. I have a question, Monk interrupts. Mrs. Mass, the murder weapon was found behind you near the dumpster. Mrs. Mass, the murder weapon was found behind you near the dumpster. Do you have any idea how it got there? No, I don't remember much. I was scared to death. Adrian, Sherona tells him sternly, this is Benji's interview. Then what am I doing here? Monk grumbles. I don't know, she responds. I never know. Benji continues his questions. How do you know what to wear every day? What a great question, Wendy smiles. I add special buttons to my clothes so I can tell them apart. Monk looks around. This jacket, Wendy pulls on the side. I know it's blue because the bottom button is square, see? Monk bends to look at a few framed pictures. Did your parents teach you that? Benji asks. No, my parents were killed in the same car accident that blinded me. Monk turns at that. But Wendy continues. I lost everything in that one horrible moment. My sight, my family. She starts to choke up. Sorry, dear, what's next? Um Benji gestures to the frames. Why do you keep pictures on your wall? Only for visitors like you. Monk examines another of these photos, focusing on a Florida license plate. You lived in Florida, he asks. Yes, I grew up in Tampa. Benji continues. What does it feel like to be blind? Well, at first I was always a little scared. Then when I turned twenty, I decided that I wasn't going to be scared no more. I accepted it. Now I feel I can do anything I want. Well, I think we've taken enough of your time, misses Mass. Sherona says, standing. Miss Mass rises too. Thank you so much, Sherona says. Benji faces her and shakes her hand. Thank you, misses Mass. Thank you, Benji. Good luck with your report, she says warmly. Then she shakes Sherona's hand. She tries to shake Monk's with her hand held in the air.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:24

Monk tries to get Shrona to do the shit. This is horrible. He just stands there and he's like, Sharona, you you put your hand out instead, you know?

SPEAKER_01 1:03:32

It's all silent fighting with eye movements and she's refusing. They silently fight back and forth until he finally does it himself. Outside of the house, Benji looks at his notes. Sherona makes a phone call and Monk stares forward, holding his hand out. His eyes are blanked, and he keeps kind of extending his hand. He's got that deep figuring out face that he gets where he just kind of It's cont contemplative. Yes. Ooh, good word. He turns to the boy. Benji, Benji, I need your notebook and knapsack. Monks links the backpack on his right shoulder and puts the notebook under the same arm, approaching a ticket cop. Hello, he smiles to her. I just want to say thank you for the great job you're doing. And he extends his left hand. The cop is a little wigged, but she shakes the extended hand with her own left hand. Monk gets that satisfied little grin of his. What are you doing? Sharona asks. He swings the backpack off and hands it to Benji. We just solve the case. In a holding cell, we find our streaker waiting, wearing a long police jacket. Lady Godiva, an officer approaches, opening the cell. It's your lucky day. Somebody made bail. The streaker wanders out of the cell a little confused. In a park, Wendy Mass is taking a walk, and the cops are watching. What's she doing here? Stodemeyer asks Monk from behind some bushes. I asked her to meet me, Monk explains. Do you mind telling me why? The captain asks. You'll see, Monk promises, just wait. Sherona, Disher, Stodemeyer, and Monk are watching from behind a large bush as the streaker arrives in all his glory. I bailed him out and hired him, Monk tells them excitedly. You mind telling me why, the captain asks, but he needn't, as we quickly see why. The foursome watches as the streaker happily jogs right by Wendy, who does count them two double takes. Monk lights up, and Sharona nods in approval. Wendy giggles to herself at the streaker.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:33

She can see. She can see. She can see.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:41

I just like that part. The captain wanders off, just missing the streaker running up. Sharona, he smiles. Sherona gasps. Justin. What are you doing here? Justin asks. Friend of yours, dishermocks. She glares at them both. We still on for Saturday night, Justin. Est hopefully. And Munker and Disher both share a grin.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:04

Of course, Sharona is dating the punchline of the episode. You know, just like usually.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:10

He's cute. He is very cute. And he's an architect according to her internet research. So so what if he's willing to do it?

SPEAKER_02 1:06:17

And he must have a gorgeous body if he's willing to like parade it.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:21

I say if this is the worst thing. Come on. Back at the station, Stademeyer is grilling mass. When did you get your vision back? A year ago, she tells him. It was your accident at the supermarket, Monk says. She sighs. When I woke up, I regained my sight and my left eye. That's how it happens sometimes. After a blow to the head, it was a miracle. Sharona listens, disgusted. You didn't tell anybody? No, Monk says, you kept it a secret. If people believed you were blind, you could kill Sonny Cross, and no one would ever suspect you. Why would you want to kill Sonny Cross? Dottelmeyer asks her. But Monk wants all the lines. Revenge, she says. He was driving the car that killed your parents and left you blind in Tampa. She watches as he paces back and forth. Fade to black and white. You knew he toured a lot, Monk narrates. You waited for him to come to San Francisco and eventually he did. They announced on the radio station that Willie Nelson and his manager would be interviewed. So you got there early. We see her place the note on the radio station door. Then you waited. We see her behind the dumpster, gun at her chest. Sunny walks down the alley and she emerges, revolver at his chest. Before you shot him, Monk asks, Did you tell him who you were? Yes, Wendy whispers menacingly, then in black and white, You killed my parents. This one's for them. And she points. Pow, one in the chest. Monk continues as Sunny runs, and then you made sure the second one was from twenty feet away. Pow she hits him again. A crime no blind person could commit. Monk continues. But then Willie Nelson showed up in the alley. You didn't count on that. She tosses the gun behind the dumpster. And you couldn't just leave the scene, so she starts screaming. Just as she was in the start of the episode. You had to pretend to be a witness, Monk finishes. Jason Cross served a year and a half. She glares at the captain. Vehicular manslaughter. She shakes her head. That wasn't justice. What I did last week? That was justice. She looks back to Monk. How did you know? I knew that Cross had been arrested in Tampa. When you mentioned you'd grown up there, it seemed like a remarkable coincidence. But I didn't put it all together until I remembered something you had done last week when you met Captain Staldemeyer. Me? Stot says. When you came in with your right arm in a sling, black and white. We're back in the first meeting. Stademeyer is shaking hands. Everyone in the room naturally extended their left hand, Monk says, including Mrs. Mass. Back to color, Monk continues. This was before anyone mentioned you had hurt your arm. So how could she have known that you offered your left hand? Stodemeyer smiles at him, delighted. Mrs. Mass stands and faces Monk. She shakes his hand. Thank you, Mr. Monk, she smiles. You're thanking him? Disher says. I'm so relieved, she tells him. It was tearing me up inside that that poor man was taking all the blame. You're going to have to go to prison, Sharona tells her. I understand, Wendy says softly. Maybe I can talk to the DA, Stalmeyer says, about extenuating circumstances. There's only one thing I want, she says.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:39

Okay, that pisses me off by the way. I know. She murdered a man in cold blood. Extenuating circumstances my ass. I know. I agree.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:49

There's only one thing I want, she tells the captain. And what's that? She looks at Monk meaningfully, a window. In the next and final scene, Monk and Willie are at the cemetery, at Trudy's grave to be specific. Willie is singing and Monk is holding his clarinet. They start to play together, blue eyes crying in the rain. With tears in his eyes, Monk plays. Oh. Such a nice ending. It is. He really has a beautiful voice. I've never heard blue eyes smiling in the rain or crying or whatever it was. I thought it was a really nice episode. I liked the music. This episode will be a little late because honestly, guys, this is for us, and we don't need that kind of stress. We don't need that. But we still do love you, and we'd love it if you adopted and didn't shop did. Yeah. And I love you. I love you. Let's have a great week and you guys too. We'll see you next week.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:27

Okay. Bye. Bye.