Plot Twist: We’re Starting Over

Starting over isn’t easy—but sometimes it’s exactly what we need. ❤️‍🩹

In this episode, we discuss what it means to rebuild after divorce, heartbreak, job loss, financial setbacks, friendship breakups, motherhood shifts, mental health struggles, addiction, and life’s unexpected detours. We unpack the pressure of timeline culture, social media comparison, and the feeling that we’re somehow “behind.”

What if starting over isn’t failure—but redirection? ↪️

Join us as we talk about letting go of expectations, embracing small wins, building quietly, and finding the courage to begin again. Because your life isn’t over, you’re not ruined, and it’s never too late for a fresh start.

Grab and chair and join our table! 🪑 

Love, 

Ash & Chess

Transcript

unknown 0:00

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 0:02

Hello and welcome back to Did She Just Say That? I'm Jesson. And I'm Ashley. And this week we are talking about starting over this little bit of a plot twist.

SPEAKER_03 0:13

Dun dun dun.

SPEAKER_02 0:15

Bom bum bum. Not what you think. But you can catch us on all the social platforms, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok. And if you are streaming on Spotify or any of the other streaming platforms, you can also head over to YouTube if you want to see the visual of this action, whatever. Our brightness today. We are bright today. We are halfway through June. And the sweater would love to say that we're enjoying summer, but we pre-record and it's not June. So even though it was 90 today. It was. It was it was she was a hot one.

SPEAKER_05 0:57

She was a hot one.

SPEAKER_02 0:59

So did you say you're Ashley?

SPEAKER_05 1:03

I did say I'm Ashley.

SPEAKER_02 1:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:06

Remember the last time I tried to introduce you for you, I was awkward. I don't know, it was awkward.

SPEAKER_01 1:11

Alright, girl, whatcha got?

SPEAKER_05 1:13

Alright, so starting over can mean so many things. When you hear starting over, what do you think?

SPEAKER_03 1:22

Cool. New beginnings. Um fresh air. New outlook. Fresh eyes. Um new adventures. Setting in some hardness.

SPEAKER_05 1:52

I love that. Your first instinct though was positive.

SPEAKER_02 1:58

Well, when you get a fresh start, it's all about perspective. Yep. And if you start with a negative perspective, it could be harder for you to start. And it's who wants a negative outlook? Right. You n I mean you're gonna bring negativity to it.

SPEAKER_04 2:20

Sure.

SPEAKER_02 2:20

Hard things happen. Hard to be hard. Yeah. And if the difficult situations happen, then you deal with them, but you always wanna It's a fresh start. Why start pa negative?

SPEAKER_05 2:32

Yeah. Have you ever had a start over? Have you ever had to start over? That was a really loaded, like just fell in a mouth.

SPEAKER_02 2:39

I mean in so many ways. Like multiple times? Well, yeah, different situations. I mean, I started over at five as a fatherless little girl.

SPEAKER_01 2:50

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 2:52

I started over in my thirties as a mom that's single. Mm-hmm. Careers have changed. I have started new jobs. Um, I've moved from one state to another and had to start over friendships.

SPEAKER_03 3:11

Start over dating.

SPEAKER_05 3:17

Starting over um basically go motherhood.

SPEAKER_02 3:23

Started I mean and with each addition, it was a transition.

SPEAKER_03 3:28

So lots of new church. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 3:37

Starting over has and and if you're in the thick of it right now that might be a hard and my goal too, I guess, is the message that's being sent across here is that it it's okay, maybe because when uh we think about starting over and you're in the thick of it, first of all, there's so much emotion, raw emotion, and you're in it. And you're gonna hear me say sometimes remove the emotion from it, but that's hard to do. So as you're going through this journey, maybe it's more of a first step is to say, like it's gonna be okay. First of all, you're gonna make it through. And and I can you can say that because with the little saying, you've already made it through a hundred percent of the days you've already met yeah, like been through, right? Right. And you've probably been through things already. So starting over maybe something that's not really new for you, but you're just now going like putting it as a process and maybe looking at it if you're a process-oriented person, this might be a great tool to think about in creating a new beginning for yourself.

SPEAKER_02 4:49

So don't you think as a society, sometimes we have put a negative take on certain areas of life that you have to start over? Absolutely. Like starting a new job is like, oh, that's awesome, let's celebrate it. Or oh, you moved, let's celebrate it. But other things of starting over aren't always celebrated. And so you have you're carrying this shame into starting over.

SPEAKER_05 5:17

Well, you know, it used to be like sometimes like thinking about divorce, now there are divorce parties. People will be having divorce parties these days. Yeah. I know. That's probably a little more covered up, uh frustrations and whatnot. But anyway, starting over, I have so many examples here. Starting over. One that was hit very real and true to us is divorce.

SPEAKER_04 5:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 5:41

Starting over. Heartbreak. Multiple levels of heartbreak, different kinds of heartbreak. Losing a job. Starting a job, financial setbacks, friendship breakups. You mentioned that one earlier. Motherhood shifts, mental health, mid midlife crisis. You know, like that aha moment the other day where I was like thinking about my age, I'm like, I'm considered truly the midlife right now, which is crazy. Yeah.

unknown 6:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 6:13

And then I'm over here going, what kind of midlife crisis can I create? Like for that, like there's right, like there's this like all the men buy Corvettes. Corvettes. I'm like, what do you like? What do women do? Midlife crisis? Yeah, is there like a stereotypical one that like bow top from this? I don't know. Just create like new beauty things. Maybe. I don't know. I don't know. I should say that because you know that's a great question.

SPEAKER_02 6:42

I mean, like we both said Corvette.

SPEAKER_05 6:44

Yeah, that was the first thing from like that car the car.

SPEAKER_02 6:46

Well, because that's the that's what it's always talked about. Oh, he's going through a midlife crisis. He just bought a Corvette.

SPEAKER_05 6:52

Right.

SPEAKER_02 6:53

Or a motorcycle.

SPEAKER_05 6:55

Yeah. Yeah. It's a vehicle. It's a mode of transportation. Yeah. That's a big card. I um I usually have an answer for most things and uh I have no answer. We'll have to research that one. Yeah. Moving. Moving back and new state, new old things. That's not an easy one. No, we know that person for sure. And addiction. That was one that like I didn't just uh like I wouldn't have thought of, but but goodness. The moments you if you're going through that, well, addiction, there's so many things. It's the person that's going through it, it's the people that are surrounding it. And maybe you're in a family right now and and someone's this is their fifth time going to rehab. I mean you're starting every time you're starting over. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:50

When the person going through it and normally when they have to change their friend group, they have to change so many things. Yeah. On top of starting a life sober.

SPEAKER_05 7:59

Absolutely. There's so many things that come along with it. And starting over, what are some what are some feelings or emotions affiliated with starting over?

SPEAKER_04 8:12

What do you say?

SPEAKER_02 8:14

Well there's gonna be fear and there's gonna be happiness. I mean because even for with addiction, like there's that, oh my gosh, I'm doing this. But there's the fear, oh am I gonna be able to do this? You know, so the same feeling, yeah, both and probably the waves of both of those emotions. Yeah. Sure. I think I really do feel like it can be exciting, but it can be scary. Um there's so much growth. You're going to grow, you're gonna stretch yourself, you are going to do things, those hard things, the things you're like, I don't know that I'd ever be able to do that. And you do it. Yeah. You know, we talked about you said divorce and living away from your family with four kids. And it's like your whole world is together and you don't have your family to can you come and help me pack up or can I crash on your couch for a week until I can move into my place? And it's yeah, yeah. Um I'm I remember being so scared. Like there was a part of me that was like, I know that this is the right thing, but and taking like my the kids out of the situation just as a woman that you know, I had given up my career to be at home with my kids. And I'll never forget. Like, I leaned on my friends and family because their encouragement reminded me, like, just take the next step. Don't think about tomorrow. Don't think about what all of the th what can you get done today that is going to make tomorrow easier. But do not think about tomorrow or next week. And some days I can only think about the next hour. What how who do I need to show up for and how do I need to show up in this hour? Because that is all I've got in me, because I know what's coming, and it's going to be hard. And the day that we told our kids we were getting divorced, like the anticipate, like they have no clue that their whole world is about to change.

SPEAKER_00 10:46

Right.

SPEAKER_02 10:47

And we're having to put on this show and this front, and you feel like you're a liar and you're fake, and we hadn't really told a lot of people. Um, and you're sending here, I couldn't even think about what we would do after that. I just had to make sure that I had the therapist prepared, the place prepared, that Mike and I were in sync to walk in there, what we were gonna say, what not to say, what space we were gonna give. And that was all that my brain could comprehend or handle at that time.

SPEAKER_00 11:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:32

Um, and so just happen to be so in that moment of because once you get through one hard situation or one difficult encounter, it's like, okay, I did that. Now I can move on to the next one. And you have to let that one go. Like it's coming. Yeah, and of course, like telling your kids something like that, you can't just let go, you know, it's going to you're you're gonna revisit it in but to get to the next place and other situations, whatever it may be. Um, but you've sometimes and making a list, these are the things that are non-negotiables that I have to get done today or I have to face everything else can fall.

SPEAKER_04 12:14

Yep.

SPEAKER_02 12:15

But this is and that's all I've got. Like, oh, I see you calling, but I can't take that. I will deal with that tomorrow. It goes on my tomorrow list. Yes. And I'm not looking at my tomorrow list until in the morning.

SPEAKER_05 12:26

Yes. So what I'm hearing you say though, is there is intention behind it, and there is a plan. And you may not know the plan far out, no, but there is a intention of what do you need to get done the here and now.

SPEAKER_02 12:44

And for a planner, yeah. That is not easy.

SPEAKER_05 12:48

Yeah. The second thing I heard you say, you mentioned having even though they weren't there, you still reached out to people. Oh. So having a a community or having uh people to that you lean on and rely on. So I think those two things are just really important to mention.

SPEAKER_02 13:08

You're not built to do life alone.

SPEAKER_05 13:11

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 13:12

And we I mean this just came up, yeah. And we'll talk about it more in a few weeks. Yes. Um you are stronger with numbers. Yes. And on the days that I mean, think about it. We know when each other are having a hard day. The other day. Mm-hmm. And that's whenever when you have that community, those safe people, you can let that guard down. They're gonna pick up where you can't.

SPEAKER_04 13:44

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_02 13:45

And it may be as small as, hey, I see you today. You're here if you need me. Or you're extra goofy and make the room light. Or okay, I know you need to move. I went ahead and got boxes, and I'll be over at this time. Um, and you're you got a new place that has absolutely nothing. I did that already, and here are the essentials that I know that you need. So there's a box full of it. It's it's by your front door. Yeah. Like toilet paper, toothpaste. Yeah. Like, yeah. I mean, but it it's those kind of things, and that's why you are not supposed to do life alone. And if you're doing life where you don't have community and you only have your partner, the pressure that you're putting on your partner in those times, yeah, that is that's a lot.

SPEAKER_05 14:42

That's a lot to carry, yeah. Yeah, always encourage having friendship outside of relationship. Yeah. But we've talked before, you know, there are some people that get lost and that's a whole nother episode, girl. Oh getting lost and get and just relying on the person you're with. So too much pressure. It is. But yeah, you mentioned and then obviously I remember some of the the words that register to me during the divorce. Because the person that files or is the person you know, the person that makes the the gesture or whatever. I will never forget that. That I was the one, you know, I I will remember that always. And so just see and then you know, having kids involved, that's a whole dynamic. And so I just remember all going through all of that and how like everyone was like, you know, on the other side, and you know, you get there and it's like I'm in r uh this is where I'm at right now, and you have to go through it. Yeah, you can't always see the other side, and sometimes that's good.

SPEAKER_02 15:45

Yes, yeah. Sometimes that is good. You don't need to see the other side, you just need to see that your feet can take another step.

SPEAKER_05 15:52

Yep, absolutely. So yeah, you mentioned a couple that you registered with with those. Um same. I mean, gosh, heartbreak. Um job changes, you know, new jobs, there's excitement, but there's diff there's fear. Fear, yeah. Um friendship breakups.

SPEAKER_02 16:10

I mean so hard.

SPEAKER_05 16:11

Yeah, very hard. Starting over with that, you know, mental health, all those things are just very and there are plenty more. Oh examples.

SPEAKER_02 16:21

Well, then mental health, you know, I feel like sometimes people don't want others to know what their struggles are to ever be used against them or something like that. So not only are you like when you start a new job, you celebrate it with your people or you let it be known, but when you're coming on the other side of that hurdle with mental health, you don't always want people to know. So when you're if you don't have those people that are so close that know everything that the the mask comes off in front of, that is not something that you should do alone. Like it should be celebrated and we shouldn't have that stigma on it anymore either. And you it you may you may go backwards, like, and I think I may have talked about this a little bit on an ep on a previous episode, but I had a grandmother that battled with mental health really bad. And she and I got along great. That wasn't the case for her and everybody in our family, and you never knew how she was gonna show up. Um, it was so out of control. And if she could have just taken the and I'm not a big medicine person at all. I mean, you don't know that about me because you just know what we talk about on here, but I am not a medicine person, but for the mental health disorder that she had, she needed medicine, and she would not take it in I think it was like maybe five or six months, don't quote me, but um, she moved in before she passed away. She moved in with us, and my mom and I were taking care of her, and we were able to get her on the medication that she needed, and she came to life and we celebrated her so big, and it was so refreshing that she got to end her life. She was no longer bound by all of these fears and false realities. Um, she would get up and dance and tell us stories about when she was young. And I guess her and my grandfather were like they did they would go dancing at different little dance halls. Yeah, and she taught me how to jitter bug and like all of this different, and it was so amazing, and we couldn't celebrate it too big because she didn't know the medicine that she would take. Oh black. I feel like because we'd always just be like, Oh, you know, we don't have all the right medicine.

SPEAKER_00 19:09

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:10

That scared me. Did it um but that was something that man, like she missed out on so much of her life. Yeah. Um but she did, you know, she got the those lap, but that wasn't something that we really shared.

SPEAKER_04 19:24

Great.

SPEAKER_02 19:25

That because there's such a stigma on it, and when you come on the other side of it, like it's not just beautiful for you, it's beautiful for those around you.

SPEAKER_05 19:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:36

And they want to celebrate you.

SPEAKER_05 19:38

Oh yeah. Most definitely. And I think I think through, you know, these hard times, if you are the kind of person that goes to social media and you just throw your whole life, just just know that there are ways to healthily do things. I don't know. I not that I'm they're just oversharers.

SPEAKER_01 20:08

I mean that's where they get yeah, their happiness, I guess.

SPEAKER_02 20:13

And that's what like everybody's like, well, you guys post on social media all the time. I was never a real a real big poster before. I'm like, that is such a highlight, real. Like, yeah, you have no clue what goes on in my real life.

SPEAKER_01 20:23

Right.

SPEAKER_02 20:24

Even though we're sitting here talking on a podcast every single week, or we're posting something on social. You have no clue what's I mean, we share little tidbits, yes, and we're we're honest with you all, that's not the case. Um, but there's still so much of our labs that are private and life is still happening. Yeah. And you share what you want and you get highlight rails, and yes, you can you can start doing the comparing with those who share. Hey, some of them make good money doing that. Like kudos to you, like slow clap for you. Um, but there's also a dark side of that.

SPEAKER_03 21:05

Sure. Yep.

SPEAKER_05 21:08

So when thinking through starting over, it's not sometimes it's not they're starting over, like full slate, clean slate starting over, but then there's like times where you just need a little reset or you just need a little bit of uh adjustment to what's going on.

SPEAKER_01 21:26

Yes.

SPEAKER_05 21:27

So I think through, you know, I I feel like I use this word all the time and it's intention and the planning, the the surrounding yourself with community when life is happening, like if you're already doing life, like you're preparing yourself sometimes for these events to happen. Sometimes. But being intentional. And uh and some of these things I was gonna say earlier, some of these things like happen.

SPEAKER_02 21:56

Yeah, like death. Yeah, a lot of that is not intentional. Right. It is one second changes your whole life. And you're starting over and it's it's in devastation.

SPEAKER_05 22:11

You know, so it's not all with divorce. Sometimes you like it blindsides you and you have paper sitting in front of you. Or sometimes you're the person that's initiating and you're like, I'm gonna wait, I'm gonna wait until like sometimes we wait until there's the right moment to do things and just so just thinking through like a clean slate versus a reset, um, but being intentional and I always ask myself too this like you know, why when life is happening, it's so encompassing, there's so many emotions, so many things happening. But if you can truly go, what is the end goal here? What it what is the accomplishment, what am I trying to get to? So you can bite it off in chunks and be able to be intentional with a a plan around it or because we know I've said this plenty of times, when I make decisions off of pure emotion, I'm not in the right headspace.

SPEAKER_02 23:07

Yeah, you gotta set in that before you make big de And we say starting over and we talked about big events. There are a lot of small start and I would don't even know like I'm sitting here thinking about it. Some of it it tur it turns to a restart, but it's really growth. And when do we we never want to stop growing and like you said, it's kind of like just a little twit, you know, a little a little shift, little adjustment, and you always want to be adjusting, you're bettering yourself, you're bettering your life, you're bettering your your career, your financial gain, your I mean, all of these things. So starting over, maybe it's not always this huge event, and maybe it's a restart. Like maybe it's you've pushed pause on some things that were happening, and you push and play again. And it's growth and it's healthy. Yeah, it's uncomfortable, but I don't think that we're supposed to be comfortable either.

SPEAKER_05 24:18

Ooh. Because in my notes I have, comfort does not always equal healthiness.

SPEAKER_02 24:25

So 100% agree.

SPEAKER_05 24:28

If you have that I am a gut person, if your gut is off and your body is telling you something, if you're breaking out in hives, if you are every other week on a podcast, I'm kidding. Right. If you are noticing your body's reaction to something, that is sometimes entailing that yeah, it's time to pay attention to something. So there's something there that requires some attention. And you probably know sometimes we but we even know it sometimes and we're like we push it off and it and but then the hives keep coming back or the you know, right? And so just thinking through, like just being intentional.

SPEAKER_02 25:13

And don't you think intentionality is gonna bring growth and change and like yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_05 25:20

And if there's a part of your life where you're just not maybe you're not happy with it, or you're not, you know, it's okay to make that adjustment, make that change. You don't have you don't have to just start fresh.

SPEAKER_02 25:31

Maybe it is that just turn it turn it turn her up. That's right, turn her up. Turn it up or turn it off.

SPEAKER_05 25:38

Oh my goodness, or something like that. Lock in. It's time to lock in. But there are other factors and things that we think timeline culture. You know, we're a society that people very much so are you know the timelines. This is the way it's supposed to be. Well, you know what? It's not happening that way. And and so just the pressures family, friends put on the questions, all the things. The comparison. We talked about that with social media, you know, and and it's so easy because we can I mean that that is the if you if you want to make yourself sad sometimes, just go to social media and and compare yourself to all the things that are happening.

SPEAKER_02 26:25

I will not allow myself on social media the first hour I'm awake.

SPEAKER_05 26:28

That's so good. That's good.

unknown 26:32

I like that.

SPEAKER_02 26:33

And before my feet hit my floor, yeah, I have already prayed. Mm-hmm. So I I have a certain little prayer. I pray every morning. Yeah. And I do not allow myself on social media for that first hour. You never know if it's gonna be something positive or negative right up on there.

SPEAKER_05 26:50

That's the way the day is gonna start. Um I do because I wait for Chessin's sugar britches. Good morning, sugar britches. I wait for those little chickens every day to pop up on my that little thing. I'm like, yes, it's my chickens. It's my chess with my chickens.

SPEAKER_02 27:14

She may even got some homemade videos.

SPEAKER_05 27:18

Oh so good. So good. We need to post those one day.

SPEAKER_02 27:22

We need to we'll we'll do this week we'll uh of this episode we'll we'll share one of the sugar bridges grills.

SPEAKER_05 27:29

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 27:30

And find you a friend to send them to. Makes them happy.

SPEAKER_05 27:33

Oh yeah. But when all these things are happening and you're starting over, you're adjusting, you're gonna get the questions and then the whole explanation. And you you don't have to explain yourself. I think maybe someone needs to hear that. Someone here needs to hear that today. Yes, but we're in church. You know, they say like, someone here Oh yeah, this is for someone for somebody. This is for somebody that you don't have to explain. No, no need to explain.

SPEAKER_02 28:01

And so if someone is genuinely concerned about you and they're like, Hey, I need you to help me understand this, that's one thing. Yeah, but for you to have to explain why you're making a decision to better yourself or to create the happiness that you want, no, and you do not have to say, Does that make sense? You clearly said what you wanted to say in your life, right?

SPEAKER_05 28:24

Yeah. But reframing the whole concept of this whole piece of maybe just redirecting. You're redirecting something. You're down going down a path and you're instead of going this way, you're not happy. Let's redirect. So starting over, I mean the first thing that comes to my mind is Chris Tableton's song for something over. But I just I just feel like maybe starting over needs to just be seen as a different I don't know. I can't describe it.

SPEAKER_02 28:57

A positive, not a negative.

SPEAKER_05 28:59

Not a negative thing starting over. Because we think starting over.

SPEAKER_02 29:02

Oh, she's starting over again.

SPEAKER_05 29:04

Or going backwards. That's not always the case.

SPEAKER_02 29:07

Even if it is a step backwards, you're gonna come out of it ahead.

SPEAKER_05 29:12

Yeah. Two s was it? One step backwards and two steps forward.

SPEAKER_02 29:17

If that's not it, that's what we're making that.

SPEAKER_05 29:19

Yeah, that's it. Uh that's it. That's it. Yeah.

unknown 29:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 29:23

But building and and you can build quietly. You know, if you don't want to put it all out there, build quietly and then when you're ready, people are going people see things.

SPEAKER_02 29:37

Absolutely. And even if they don't see it, you they didn't even know that maybe you were going through something, you have those people that are close that you don't know. They know. And man, when you do something, when you handle a situation differently.

SPEAKER_05 29:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 29:59

They're gonna celebrate you. And it's like, well, wait a minute. Okay, not only did I do that, but they they saw it. And we have been doing that a lot with each other lately.

SPEAKER_05 30:09

You're like, I see a muscle there. I'm like, oh my gosh, thank you. I've been working on my arm. Like I'm not a put I'm not like working on okay, maybe I did post a couple videos lately about working at all. But besides the point, I don't know that I saw video.

SPEAKER_02 30:24

Your social media does not well, you know me. I'm not a scroller if it's not the first thing I don't see it. Yeah, yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_05 30:29

Yeah, I feel that I can't help it. I digressed from that.

SPEAKER_02 30:32

But it's true that those those that are close will see it. And even if it's not seen, you know that you handle it differently now. And that's what matters.

SPEAKER_05 30:41

Exactly. Growth self-growth.

SPEAKER_02 30:42

And you can celebrate yourself 100%.

SPEAKER_05 30:45

And someone else has hear this today. Not every season needs an audience.

SPEAKER_02 30:51

That's important. Yes. For depending on your personality. Absolutely. We're both and this is so funny. We're both extroverts. Every Sunday at church.

SPEAKER_05 31:04

So funny. It's not here. Not here.

SPEAKER_02 31:08

They always make you do the awkward. We're gonna give you 60 seconds, shake hands. Oh, it's not even that. It's the get out of the aisle and walk to the other side. Yeah, that it makes me it's just thinking about it now.

SPEAKER_05 31:20

We're like, hi.

SPEAKER_02 31:22

Oh, and we'll make the we can't even have a regular conversation in that time because we're both so awkward with it. And so it's so weird when you're happy and I know, do stuff like that. And that's the like it it it's okay to give us six months, we'll be we'll be up in there just honey. I was the first impressions director of a church that part of that part was my job, and I still don't like it. Like, there's no six months, there's no one here, like that is awkward to me, and I love the people that love to do it because it helps us awkward people not feel so weird. But as an extrovert, for but I I feel like I can speak for both of us on this. There are parts of us that we don't want to heal out loud, yeah, because the work is so intense and so personal that it's the exposure, but that means that we're not we're not doing the work for a an applause. We're doing the work to better ourselves or to change a situation or whatever it may be, but we know and we come to the table much more prepared and strong to where we don't need the celebration because the work has been done.

unknown 32:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:54

And we're showing up stretched or healed or in a new and we see it in each other. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 33:07

It's so great. I love telling you, like, like I don't even have to say, like, it's like a smile, and it's like, we just know.

SPEAKER_02 33:14

Yeah, what that is that happened yesterday.

SPEAKER_05 33:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:17

You were like, how'd you know that's what I was gonna say? Like we didn't finish the sentence, and the other people that we were with were like, so what are y'all talking about?

SPEAKER_05 33:25

Yes, yes. And I when we're going, oh my gosh, she's not like that's so funny. Yeah. But I think I'm seeing that so much more lately with everything like we've that we've been going through since I I mean, do you feel like we've been doing this podcast podcast for like a year?

SPEAKER_02 33:42

Well, I told you. Yeah, I do. And the other day, February. It seems like so much longer. Yeah. In a lot of ways, until this mic gets in my face and I'm like, uh and I'm like hitting it and things.

unknown 33:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:57

We still don't know how to do anything because that's push record. You know, you're still getting the beginners part of you're going to get that for a long time. Yeah, you're welcome. Yeah.

unknown 34:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 34:08

But this is what's important to us. It's not the freely, we gotta have these certain sounds, we gotta everybody's like, you need to do this, you need to do that. Start your own podcasts, right? Do those things. Yes, because we're not here for are there some things that we would like to do? Yeah. Sure. We don't, but we're not exhausting our energy, like, oh my gosh, we haven't got this done. We want to be real, we want to be honest, we want to say the things that have either taunted us, that we've tried to hide, that we think can help somebody else to shine light on. And other than that, let the cookies crumble where they crumble. Yeah. Let it let the podcast land where it where it's where it may be.

SPEAKER_05 34:49

I mean, I remember us talking about this podcast and we were like, you know, what do we and our goal wasn't number of followers, number it was that one person. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:00

What do we share that we wish someone would have been open and honest with us about when we were younger or when we were going through this or through that? Like Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 35:09

Yeah. So that's our goal. And so I mean, do we get excited when we have a video that's like, oh my god, we had 30,000 you look at that video? Like that's exciting. But like, of course, it's not a goal at all.

SPEAKER_02 35:21

No.

SPEAKER_05 35:21

Our goal is to have fun. Mission accomplished. Mission accomplished.

SPEAKER_02 35:25

And we've gotten so much more.

SPEAKER_05 35:26

Yeah. On top of that. So with that being said, you're not behind. You're not ruined. Your life isn't over. You can rebuild any time. Starting over isn't the embarrassing part, but maybe abandoning yourself for years is.

SPEAKER_03 35:44

Oh, that's good.

SPEAKER_05 35:46

Yeah. And so give yourself time and attention. If you're a person that has been sleeping under the rug, under that rug out the door. Face face that. Sorry. Face that thing, whatever it is. And look in the eyes, look at the face. It's okay to do a scared too. Yes. And and just just start, just begin.

SPEAKER_02 36:21

Take that first step. And tell somebody, hey, that's what I'm about to do. And maybe it just stays between you and Jesus. Um it's okay if you start over on the same thing more than once.

SPEAKER_04 36:40

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_05 36:42

But I don't know. This I know this message itself is very open for interpretation because there are so many things that we that people go through. But the overarching message just remains the same and that it's okay. And you know, we always talk about like we we know some things, we don't know all things, but we will be a support always.

SPEAKER_01 37:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 37:10

And so yeah, but I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 37:15

I like this little message. And you know Will you say that last thing again?

SPEAKER_05 37:19

Mm-hmm. Okay. Starting with you are not behind. You're not ruined, your life isn't over. You can rebuild any time. Starting over isn't the embarrassing part, but maybe abandoning your abandoning yourself every year says.

SPEAKER_04 37:41

And always remember you have a seat at our table.