How Do I Know God's Will for My Life?

What if finding God’s will isn’t about chasing a hidden blueprint for your life? In this episode, we talk about the pressure of trying to figure out the “right” decisions — who to date, where to live, what career to choose — and what the Bible actually says about being led by God. We unpack why His will is often more about who we’re becoming than just what we’re doing. If you’ve ever been afraid of missing God’s plan for your life, this conversation is for you.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

So, we have questions. But they're questions that you haven't asked. Because either they're uncomfortable or complicated or even just a little bit risky. Questions that most people don't ask because they just don't want to go there. But in this podcast, we do want to go there because we believe that our honesty is ready to find honest questions. We believe that our comedy has a lot of answers that are worth using over it. So in this podcast, we want you to put your questions. Let's look at them together. Let's leave it. Let's go there. What's going on, Landon Podcasting, and welcome to another episode of Let's Go There. If we haven't been able to meet yet, my name is Ben Pucas, and I'm going to be your host for this episode. And I'm joined in the podcast studio, as always, with Russ the Bus. And as always, we all are here to hop on the Russ bus. And Russ and I love the fact that we're going to be able to talk about this question today. We're going to be able to talk about a question that so many people have. And again, that's the goal of this podcast. The goal of this podcast isn't just to ask questions that nobody's trying to ask. We're not just trying to check a box and answer the easy questions. In fact, Russ and I were just looking at the schedule over the next few weeks and we were kind of laughing about what the questions are coming up. There are questions that are messy. They're going to be questions that are going to ruffle up some feathers. And there's going to be some questions that honestly, like I'm going to wrestle with as I as I prepare. There's going to be questions that I answer that some of you listening to this may even disagree with me about the answers that I give. But again, the goal of this podcast is not to avoid hard questions because you have to do a lot of research. The goal of this podcast isn't to just avoid hard questions because people are going to disagree. The goal of this podcast is to get people in the room. And the way we're doing that is through airing this on Apple Podcasts and on Spotify and on YouTube so people can be able to gather around to say, what do I think about this? We all have the Holy Spirit in us. So as you're listening to me, what I never want people to do is to listen to this podcast and go, Ben said it, so it has to be true. Like I want us so badly, so deeply to take this, just like the Bereans did in the book of Acts, and to go, okay, I'm going to take what you're saying and I'm going to bring it to the Word of God. The Word of God is the ultimate source, absolute source of objective truth. Not Ben Pucas, not any of the other pastors that you listen to, not whoever says something from stage. But this question right here is something that is a very commonly asked question. And the question that we're going to be answering today is how do I know God's will for my life? And a lot of times that question, that's a big question that people ask when we're sitting across the table from each other in coffee shops or having dinner or having lunch. And the reason is because so often it feels like people say that the will of God and what God wants in my life seems so distant. It seems that God's hiding himself. It seems that God is asking me to do things, but he's not making it clear what he wants me to do. Like people are trying to wonder, what school am I supposed to go to? I was a student pastor for 10 years, and that was a huge question that students asked was, hey, I what college does God want me to go to? You know, in that season of life, too, you start getting into college and you start dating people. And who does God want me to date? And who does God want me to marry? And where does God want me to move? And what job does God want me to have? Like there's a lot of questions that we have, and it feels like we're praying and we're like, God, would you just be able to give me the answer? What do you want? Just write it on the wall, write it on the ceiling, let me know. Put it in the clouds, bro. Because if you just tell me those things, God, I will do it and I will be faithful in it. But so often it feels like the will of God and what God is asking us to do seems very hidden from us. And again, I think we have to ask ourselves the questions. Every time we ask a question about faith, we first then, before we get an answer, we have to ask ourselves the question, why? Why do I have that question? Like I think a lot of it is it's this desire that so many of us, like deep down, we have this desire to please God. We want to do the things He's asking us to do. We want to live a faithful life. We want to be the people that he created us to be. But unfortunately, the Bible that we've been given doesn't, it's not a magic eight ball. We don't, we don't believe in the sorcery where you can look at this magic ball that can tell us what to do, mirror, mirror on the wall. That's not how the Bible is. And so a lot of times the questions that we're asking don't have direct answers in the Bible. And the principle that I want we're gonna dive in today, I'm gonna give it to you now so you can even turn this podcast off after this. Is I believe that God's word and the life that he wants us to live and the will that he has for us to enact is less about the things that we do, is less about where we move, is less about what job we take, is less about who we marry, is less about who we date. And I believe what God is most interested in is not those things that we do. What God is most interested in is the people that we are becoming. God's more interested in the people that he gets to walk with. So I believe so often God does withhold some of that will because he wants us to have that relationship with him. He has that desire to have a relationship with him. So I believe the will of God is less about finding a hidden blueprint and more about becoming the kind of person who not only can do the things that he's asking us to do, but can discern his heart. But the first thing that we have to understand about the will of God is that I've heard so often, it doesn't really feel like God is telling me what to do. Like I feel like I'm always confused about what God is asking for me to do. And if that's what we're saying, I want to say that's completely and 100% wrong because when we look at God's word, the 66 books in the Bible, we see that God has a very clear, revealed will in our lives. And so many of us want answers about marriage and about our callings and about our futures, but we ignore the revealed will that God has given us in his word. We ignore forgiveness, we ignore purity, we ignore humility, we ignore obedience, we ignore living a dangerous life for the kingdom of God. We ignore doing the one thing that Jesus says at the end of his ministry. Now, go and make disciples of all nations. We ignore when we're in a dating relationship, while we're asking God, who do you want me to date? We're ignoring that God's word says in 1 Thessalonians that it is the will of God for you to abstain from sexual immorality. And we're trying to figure out if we're supposed to date someone while we're living in sexual immorality. We're trying to figure out who God wants us to marry, but we're not the type of people who are going to live sacrificial lives in the marriages that God is going to put us in. And so the question is, why are we asking God for hidden directions when we're completely ignoring the expressed instructions that He's given us? That's like going up to our parents, and our mom and dad is like, Hey, I need you to go clean your room. This is when we're kids. And we're like, got it. And then we go up to our parents again, like, now what would you like for me to do next? And they go to your room and your room isn't made. And they're like, Well, we want you to go make your, go, go clean your room, make your bed, clean up the floor, clean up the nightstand. You're like, got it, I'm on it. And then now what do you want me to do? And they go to your room and you still haven't done it yet. And so you're like, mom and dad, it just feels like you're not, you're not being clear about what you want me to do. And I feel like your parents, if you were parents out there one day for people who are gonna be parents, for people who are parents now, if you're asking your kid to do something and they're not doing it and they're coming back and asking what to do next, you're like, I'm not gonna give you what to do next because you're not doing the first very simple thing that I'm asking you to do now. And I think that's what happens to God. And I think the reason that is, and I think the reason why we continue to ask what the will of God is when we ignore the will of God, which is so ironic, is not a lot of times because we have the desire to please God, is not because we have this desire to honor him and to be a pleasing aroma for him. I think deep down what we really desire is we desire just affirmation for the decisions that we want to make in life. We just want people to say yes, like we want God to say yes to the things that we want. But really, the reason we're not doing the will of God that he's expressed in his word is because we realize that that will and doing that will and being obedient to that will is going to come at a cost. Like the Christian life, we've talked about this before, and I'm not gonna hear and throw roses and dandelions and skip through a field. Like the life of following Jesus very rarely is easy. Very rarely is it gonna be this like super easy going, I get everything I want. In fact, Jesus promises us that, hey, when you become my disciple, the first thing that you need to do is you need to count the cost. Because guess what? The will of God, the one that we hear and ignore about sexual purity, that's hard to do. And in order for us to do that, we have to take radical steps in our relationships to make sure that we live these pure lives. That a lot of times is a cost that we're not willing to pay. In marriage, which I'm not married, but I have a lot of married friends. In order for us to live the sacrificial life to our spouse, the way that Christ honored the church and the the example that Christ gave for us, it comes at a cost. The cost is dying to ourselves because what Jesus tells us to do in his revealed will is in order for you to be my disciples, you must first take up your cross, take up your torture device and follow me. And so we're asking God, what is your will? And we're God is giving us his will and we're ignoring it, and we're still asking for it. Now, I I think it's also like this uh I meet with a lot of people, uh especially when I was a student pastor, I felt like every week was full of two or three meetings a day, and a lot of people would come uh to these meetings because they wanted advice. And they wanted advice about a dating relationship, they wanted advice about uh some problem that they're having with their classmates or with their friends. And there's one an example in particular, this person kept coming to me for advice, and I won't go into it because they're probably listening to this podcast, they'll know who they are when they hear it. And they just kept asking me for advice, and I kept giving it, and I felt like it was the advice, not just like this is my opinion, but it was more of you need to do this. And then the next week they would come, and after I gave them the advice, I said, Hey, how did that go? Like, I didn't do it because you just don't understand it the way that I do, you're not as much in it as I am. And then they would ask for advice again, and I would give advice, and they just kept ignoring the advice. And then finally, what I did is I looked at them in the eye and I said, Hey, if I'm being honest with you, it doesn't really feel like you want my advice. It feels like the reason you keep asking me questions is because you just want me to affirm that what you want is best. So I need to ask you a question here. Do you really want me to share what I believe is true? Or do you want me just to affirm whatever you want me to affirm? Because if you just want me to affirm whatever you want me to affirm, I got better things to do in my life. I have other people that want to meet, I have sermons I need to write, I have things that I need to do, and I don't need to be wasting my time just tickling your ears with the things that you want to hear. And they looked at me and they got tears in their eyes and they said, I had no idea that I was doing that. And it hit me in that moment. How often do I do that with God? How often am I, God? What do you want me to do? God, what do you want me to do? And God is so very clearly telling me what to do, and I continue not to do it because I don't want to do it. I don't want to end this relationship. I don't want to have to call this person out. I don't want to have to be a dangerous weapon for the kingdom of God and put myself out there and invite these people that don't know Jesus over for dinner because they'll think that I'm weird. And so we continue to ask God for advice. What do you want from my life? And God keeps giving it to us and we keep ignoring it because I think sometimes in our life we have this ulterior motive or this hidden agenda where we just want God to affirm the things that we want. We want to turn God less of the father that saved us and left the 99 to find the one, and we want to make them more like a genie in a bottle or some sort of vending machine or ATM. And I think that's what we have to get to in the very beginning. God has already 100% revealed his will to us. And if we are not going to do the things that he's asking us to do, then why would we ever be surprised when he doesn't reveal anything else in our life? When he doesn't reveal who we want us to marry, who we he doesn't reveal where he wants us to move or what job he wants us to take. If we continue to ignore loving sacrificially, we continue to ignore walking in purity and serving selfishly and communicating honestly.

SPEAKER_01 12:39

Because what happens is the revealed will of God is actually the foundation in which we live the entirety of our life. Like, think about that for a second. We're asking God who to marry. That's a big one. We just talked about dating last week. How can you have a successful marriage?

SPEAKER_00 13:02

What does God want? God wants us to have the abundant life. So when we're following him and we get married, God wants us to have an abundant life kind of marriage. How do you have an abundant life kind of marriage? Like Russ is sitting right there. I guarantee you, Russ, Russ, how long have you been married now? Six years. I bet you Russ has had seasons where him and his wife are vibing and where him and Emily are not. And I bet you, I will guarantee you, I don't even have this conversation with him. The times when Russ was living and Emily were living in the revealed will of God, I bet you their marriage was great. I bet you when they were not making it about themselves, they were serving each other, they were loving each other, they were sacrificing for each other, they were communicating honestly, they were calling sin out where they needed to, they were praying together, they're doing the things that God had revealed. Their marriage was successful. And I guarantee you that when one or both of them stopped doing the revealed will of God, I guarantee you their relationship suffered. So that is the goal of God. God is not just giving us a revealed will as some sort of test, like you better do this first, so then I can give you the hidden. God's like, no, you're not able to accept the hidden if you're first not willing to die to yourself to do the revealed. So the revealed will of God is 100% the foundation for walking with Him. And so now comes the hidden will of God. Like I do think so often what happens is we're asking what the hidden will of God is. And if I'm honest with you, I say this to people all the time. I think that when we're asking, who should I marry? Where should I go? What should I do? I think so often we overcomplicate that. Like I think if we are living in the revealed will of God and we're doing the things that God is asking us to do, and we're like, God, where do you want me to move? Sometimes I really do believe, in fact, I would even say most of the time, I may change this theology later in my life when I get more mature. I think most of the time, God's like, I don't know, what do you want? Where do you want to move? Who do you want to marry? Because it's less about where you go and more about wherever you do go, just bring me glory. Like if you're gonna live in my revealed will, you can move to Houston, Texas, or you can move to Albuquerque, New Mexico. And wherever you do go, whether you're in Albuquerque or Houston or Afghanistan or England, I want you to go make disciples of all nations. I want you to love your neighbor as yourself. I want you to love me with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength. I it there's a, I believe, a certain number of people that you can marry. Don't be unequally yoked with unbelievers. And I believe there are other people who we can marry, and it'll be a better marriage than others. But whoever you do marry, just love them sacrificially. But I do believe that God can, and God does a lot of time reveal his hidden will, the will that isn't necessarily revealed in scripture. And I believe what we need to do is actually found in Romans chapter 12. And I'm just gonna read Romans 12, 1 through 2, because it actually talks about how we can discern the will of God. Paul tells the Romans, he says, I appeal to you, therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice. Boom, revealed will of God. Holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. So, what are we supposed to do? We're supposed to present our bodies as a living sacrifice, which means living a holy and acceptable life to God, doing the things that He's asking us to do and living in the way He created us to live. And He tells us, do not be conformed to this world, do not look like the world, don't try to be friends with the world, but instead, what you need to do is be transformed by the renewal of your mind and that which testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. The way that we can find the hidden will of God is not through legalism, is not through just spending all this time in prayer, like hear me say this, is I think we make prayer kind of like this seance kind of thing. Like the more time I spend in prayer, the more God's gonna reveal to me. And I think sometimes it's we make it less about conversating with the God of the universe, and we make it more about a thing that we can do so we can hear the thing that we want to hear. The way that we can discern the will of God is by the transforming of our minds through the renewal of our minds. Legitimately, what God's will for our life is, is for us to be with him so much, for us to read his word, but not just read his word, but to read it and allow it to transform us, to hear the things and not just be hearers of it, but be doers of it. To be transformed is this idea of a continuous transformation. We continue to be with God, we continue to walk with God, we continue to hear his word and not just hear his word, but be transformed by it by applying it to our lives and obeying what he puts in front of us, and then we continue to be refined, our mind continues to be transformed, and as our mind continues to be transformed, we start looking more like Jesus. We and then what happens is we start thinking more like Jesus. So now all of a sudden, the things that as we're walking with God and as we're doing the things that he's asking us to do, what starts to happen is we start thinking the way that God thinks. And when we start thinking the way that God thinks, we start having desires like God's, and it becomes less about us and more about him. And then the hidden will of God is no longer the hidden will of God because he's rewired our desires to match up with his. Our minds get transformed through being with Jesus, through walking with Jesus, which is why when we do the revealed will of God, we are walking with him just like he created us to in the garden. And this has been my prayer. So we're in this building. We moved in this building in 2021, and uh I became uh the lead pastor here in 2024. And one of the prayers I prayed for both of my offices is one I prayed that this building would be an embassy uh for for the kingdom of God, that the devil would not have any claim here, that angels would come in and out and protect this place. But I prayed specifically. I said, God, would my office be like central headquarters for your kingdom? God, would I be with you so much? Would I walk with you so much that I don't have to flex really hard to hear your voice, that you would just be so near to me that when you speak to me, it's not hidden, it's not far away, but your voice is clear to me because you make it very clear that you are my shepherd and I am your sheep, and I'm since I'm your sheep, I know the voice of my shepherd. Like that, I believe, is what God is worried about. That as we walk with him, as we read his word, as we apply it to our lives, as we die to ourselves, as we walk with him, our mind gets transformed, and as our mind gets transformed and gets renewed, it starts being renewed into the mind that Jesus created us to have. So now the decisions that we make are no longer hard for us to make. It's we are being led by Christ because we're getting the mind of Christ. I love Psalm 37, which is actually a chapter in the Bible that people use to misinterpret the word of God. But it says in Psalm 37, 3, it says, Trust in the Lord and do good. Dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Commit your way to the Lord, verse 5. And he will give you the desires of your heart. And I think we hear that, and we're like, and he will give you the desires of your heart, and we're like, see, you're faithful, and God gives you what you want. He'll give you that 401k, he'll give you that 3,000 square foot house with a white picket fence and two and a half kids, and give you the people that you want in your life. And like, that's not what that verse means. Like, I want us to look at all of the words in there. Trust in the Lord. Action, trust him. Don't trust yourself, don't trust your your your own gifts, trust him in him alone. Do good, do the revealed will of God. When God tells you to do something, don't balk at it, don't wonder if that's for you. Know that you have a God that knows how life is supposed to live, and he's trustworthy, and he's good, and he's only going to tell us to do good things for our benefit, not for us to suffer, but for us to prosper, that for us to trust God, for us to do good, for us to delight ourselves in the Lord, for us to dwell in the land. Literally, the the only passive verb there is dwell. We can't control the land that we're in. We can't control the circumstances that we in, but we can choose to dwell in it. And while we're dwelling in the land, we can befriend faithfulness because the goal of faithfulness and the goal of living life for Jesus isn't the outward circumstances and the outward affirmations. It's doing the will of our Father. And then as we do those things, as we trust the Lord, as we do good, as we delight ourselves in Him, as we commit ourselves to Him, as we befriend faithfulness, what starts to happen is our desires start to match up with His, and then He starts giving us the desires of our heart because it's not about our kingdoms and about our desires and about what we want. And it becomes about His kingdom and about what He wants. He aligns our desires with His and then He starts giving us the desires of our heart. That is what it means to walk with Jesus. And so there's some practical ways that we can align ourselves with God's will, and it's not that hard. First thing That we need to do is we need to saturate ourselves in scripture, not just for knowledge, not just so we can read it, so we can tell our friends that we did it, not just so we can check it off of a list, but to know that this is the revealed will of God in our lives. This is the actual word of God. This is God speaking to us and reading it like it's the drink that we had in the desert and we haven't had a drink in three days. It's water for a thirsty soul. It's honey to a hungry stomach. And we're reading it and it's sweet, and we're not just reading it, we're not just saturating ourselves in it, we're not just getting it for information, but we start obeying it. We hear the word of God and then we apply the word of God. So we're hearing his word, we're being transformed by his word by applying it to our lives. We're praying honestly, not just God, would you just bless my plans, but God, would you shape my desires? God, this is my desire, this is what I want. But if that is outside of your rule, would you would you reshape it? Would you renew me? Would you transform me? And then as you transform me, God, would you then make your desires mine? And then would you give me the desires of my heart? And how I want to close this podcast is just looking at Jesus, who, man, I believe is the perfect example of I don't believe, he is the perfect example of fulfilling the will of God. And this is why I want to share it, because I think again, we have some ulterior motives and hidden agendas when we're asking God, what's your will in my life? Because we think that when we're walking with the will of God, it will be the best place. And is it the best place? Yes. It's the safest place, it's the best place, it's there's nothing better than walking in the will of God. But when we make better a human definition where we have health, wealth, and power, we're gonna be mightily disappointed. Like Jesus perfectly fulfilled the will of the Father. But when people look at his life outwardly it didn't probably look like he did. He obeyed the will of his father so perfectly that it led to him being rejected by the spiritual leaders, it led to him being abandoned by his closest followers, it led to him being nailed to a torture device, being whipped thirty-nine times, getting a crown of thorns placed on his head, and taking his last breath as he suffocated in his own blood. He was rejected, he was misunderstood, he was betrayed, and he was crucified. But Jesus wasn't driven by outward affirmation. Jesus was 100% driven by fulfilling the will of his father, by the joy that he received by doing what God asked him to do. Because faithfulness isn't measured by applause, it's measured by obedience. And so as we close this, what I believe we have to stop doing with the will of God is we have to stop chasing this mythical blueprint. God has revealed his will to us, and I believe so often God is less concerned about who to marry and where to go, but whatever you do, do it for my glory. Whatever you do, bring my kingdom in that place and in that person as it is in heaven. But that I do believe God does give us, God does have a desire for us to do things and marry potentially marry certain people, go certain places. And the way that we can figure out those things is not by shaking a magic eight ball, but it's by walking so closely with God that Jesus' mind becomes our mind, and then our desires get reshaped to match up with his. And so, my question to you as we end is what area of your life do you already know God is asking you to surrender? What has he already revealed to you that you need to be doing so that you can start walking more in his will? Are you walking in sin? Are you walking in darkness? Are you not in a relationship that you're supposed to be in? Or maybe you're with the right person, but you're doing the wrong things. But what are you pretending not to hear from him because obedience feels costly? And I believe that as we start enacting the revealed will of God and doing what God has already asked us to do, the hidden will of God will become less and less hidden and more and more revealed. So that's the end of this podcast. So that's the will of God. If you have questions, you can actually see at the bottom of the show notes and all of our podcasts. You can click on that. You can send us a video, you can send us a message. If you also go to our Instagram, let's go there with Ben Pucas. You can see there's a Google form for you to be able to ask questions. We'd love for you to subscribe. We'd love for you to ask questions. We would love for you to be in contact with us because we're not doing this for us. We're not doing this for money. We're doing this because we love you guys. And so that's the end of this episode. Join us next week as we talk about a fun one. Does baptism actually save me? That should be fun for us. For us to smiling over there in a seat. We'll see you next week. And until then, Pookas out.