Mindful Humanship

Regulation, Co-Regulation, and the Power of Presence

• Mindful Humanship • Episode 6

Share episode

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 44:24

In this episode, Amy Monea and Angie Payne explore the essential foundations of regulation and co-regulation, concepts that are as vital in the therapist's office as they are in the arena with horses. They break down what it actually means to "stay in your body" and why true connection only happens when our thinking brains are online.

Drawing from their own experiences as therapists and horsewomen, Amy and Angie discuss how our nervous systems constantly interact with those around us, whether we’re parenting, working with a team, or even navigating road rage on the highway. From the intensity of a horse "blowing sideways" to the quiet strength of holding space for a client, this conversation highlights how leadership is often simply the ability to stay regulated a little longer than the person (or horse) next to you.

In This Episode, you’ll explore: 

  • Defining Regulation: What it means to stay present, keep your "upstairs brain" on, and ensure your emotions haven’t hijacked your nervous system.
  • The Reality of Dysregulation: A look at "flipping your lid" and why, in survival mode, we lose access to the best parts of ourselves and our learned strategies.
  • The Magic of Co-Regulation: How one person’s regulated state can act as a lighthouse, drawing others and horses back to a state of calm and safety.
  • Leadership in the Arena: Angie shares a powerful story about "Cowboy Matt" riding Romeo; a lesson in how presenting leadership, even when you feel fear, can prevent a situation from escalating.
  • Regulation Over Strategies: Why coping skills only work when you are regulated, and why therapists prioritize state over "tools" in the early stages of healing.
  • It’s Not an Emergency: Amy reflects on riding Ringo and how a leader’s ability to communicate that a situation is safe allows others to move from hysteria back into their skills.
  • Presence Over Words: Why soft presence and "holding the feeling" inside you is far more effective than verbal instructions when someone is in a dysregulated state.

May the horse always bring you home.

Follow Mindful Humanship

Follow the Hosts 

Angie Payne

Amy Monea