From Street Life to Jesus Christ: Brian Kinyon | Gangsters For Jesus

Today, I am honored to be joined by Brian Kinyon, a man whose story is a testament to the transformative power of faith. Brian has an incredible testimony of how he triumphed over the grip of addiction and the challenges of prison. After years of struggle, he found his way to a deep, personal relationship with the Lord—a journey that has since shaped his life in remarkable ways. Today, Brian continues to serve with unwavering dedication. He is a proud member of Gangsters for Jesus ministry, and his commitment to spreading the gospel through his music, as he creates Christian songs that inspire and uplift.

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

So at eleven years old, we jump in this car and and I'm driving and I'm just driving around town going around the blocks. It's like right before night. There's still light and people could see in the car. And I just happened to drive by a cop and the cop immediately pulls me over. I didn't know what to do. I was thinking about running. I was like, we gotta run, we gotta run. I was like, I'm gonna go around the block as fast as I can. We're gonna jump out and I'm gonna run. You know, the kid got scared. He's like, no, no, no, no, I don't want to. And I was like, and then I didn't know what to do. So I just went around the block, stopped, and then I knew that we were busted, right? So and I'm I thank God for these, like the things that happened, things could have gone so much different. Any event that happened in my life, God had his hand on me. I don't know how many times I can look back and say, God saved me from something right there, time and time again.

SPEAKER_00 0:53

Welcome back to another very special testimony. Today I'm honored to be joined by Brian Kenyon, a man whose story is a testament to the transformation to the power of faith. Brian has an incredible testimony of how he triumphed over the grip of addiction and the challenges of prison. After years of struggle, he found his way to a deep personal relationship with the Lord, a journey that has since shaped his life in a remarkable way. Today, Brian continues to serve with unwavering dedication. He is a proud member of the Gangsters for Jesus ministry and is committed to spreading the gospel through his music as he creates Christian songs that inspire and uplift. If you're moved by Brian's testimony, I encourage you to subscribe to my channel to hear more powerful testimonies like this. And without further ado, let's get into it. Alright, everyone, welcome back to another testimony. Today I got a new guest on today. Brian, thank you for coming on, man. I really do appreciate it.

SPEAKER_02 1:44

Thanks, bro. Thanks for having me.

SPEAKER_00 1:46

Yeah, absolutely, no doubt. We had uh another mutual friend again, Isaiah Blancas, and uh for the listeners and stuff that have been watching, uh they've seen a lot of people that Isaiah Blancas has been sending me, and you are another one, Gangsters for Jesus, man. This is uh I've been loving these your guys' testimonies, man. They're they're always a good testimony when we get a you know record these, listening to them. The audience loves listening to them, man. So I'm really excited to hear what you got to say today, man. So uh thank you again.

SPEAKER_02 2:17

Amen. Thanks, man.

SPEAKER_00 2:19

Yeah, well, uh how do you usually start with your testimony, Ryan? Because I've never heard of before the full in-depth story, man.

SPEAKER_02 2:27

Well, let's see here. Uh I I I listen to uh a lot of people's testimonies, but um, you know, we all live uh a similar lifestyle. We have lived a similar lifestyle in Gangsters for Jesus, you know, in our past. And uh sometimes I feel like my like I was hesitant to do my testimony on here at first, and and I just feel like the Lord put it on my heart, like you know, people need to hear it. And I think he's told me that for a lot of years, but sometimes I let myself get in the way, and uh, I really just had to get out of the way so that I could do this. Um so I'll I'll start at the very beginning, really. Um, you know, I didn't I I was raised, you know, in an alcoholic abusive family. Um, my mom and my dad both drank. Um at a young age. Uh I I was like, man, I was just uh all I seen was them drinking and fighting all the time. And and a lot of times when uh when I think about it, like my first three memories. Um my first memory was I was like four years old, and and I realized that my first three m memories are kind of like traumatic, you know. And uh I think that's a part of what um what I've seen is kind of what I grew up knowing, you know. And the first one is just uh I was I almost drowned when I was like four years old, right? So um I remember this because we're out not we're out on a lake, and uh my dad, we're in a canoe with my dad, and it's just me and him. And uh as we're out there, my dad's been drinking, you know, and and uh well he tips the canoe. Um he got up to do something and obviously lost his balance a little bit. He'd been drinking and and tipped the canoe, and and and I say I almost drowned because I went out, I fell out of the canoe, and uh back then I I was born in '81, so this is like 85 or 86 that this happened. And uh and uh back then they just had those big orange, you know, life jackets that like one size fits all, but they don't fit little kids very well, and and that's all we had, anyways. And so uh I fall out of the boat, and uh my dad falls out, and and all I remember is going under, and I didn't know how to swim then. And so I just kept sinking and sinking, and and when I look back at that memory, all I remember is a bright light above me, and and this hand just comes out of nowhere and down into the water and grabs me and pulls me out, and and even though it was traumatic, it's like that was that was God in my life, even when I didn't know know of him, you know, and I didn't know that you know he was saving my life at that point. Um and he had a plan and a purpose for me, you know. And uh so when I look back that far, I see these things now. And so that that was my very first memory um when I was four years old. And my my second memory would be when uh so my dad and mom drank a lot, they fought a lot, and uh it just it was always like that, kind of chaotic, you know. And so um my my second memory is my dad hitting my mom, um, seeing the abuse, you know, and that was pretty common, um, whether it just be yelling, screaming, pushing, fighting, whatever it was. But I remember uh a few specific times, one specifically where my dad hit my mom and my mom's nose was bleeding, and it's just like at that age, uh I think that really affects us as we grow up, and um just to see that in in the in our household, you know, was was pretty traumatic for me. And then growing up, um my mom, my mom also, you know, she used to fight back against my dad. And you know, I remember one time she threw the phone, and I'm standing over by the couch, but she threw the phone and my dad. This is back when they had cords on the phones, and uh, and that cord got wrapped around my neck, and I mean it's just those little things that really uh I guess I just seen a lot of growing up between my mom and my dad. And uh so they were uh they were married till I was in about third grade.

SPEAKER_01 7:08

And uh so third grade, they divorced, um and and I uh I didn't know what to think really at that time.

SPEAKER_02 7:21

But my mom took me and we ended up going to um some apartment buildings and she got her own place and got us a place and and uh my dad stayed somewhere else and and so I didn't have a dad really for a while. He was just uh he still drank, still gambled. That's kind of his life. And uh so so he did that while me and my mom moved out, went somewhere else, and uh you know growing up as a single child, it was just me. Um I do have some half-brothers and and half-sisters, but um but just me, uh, me and my mom, and we're we're uh just adapting to our environment, really. But uh I I I met up with a bunch of people, you know, around the apartment buildings, you know, they end up becoming my friends and really close friends. And uh, you know, that's that's uh my mom still worked, she was a beautician, my dad worked for the power company, and and so my mom would be, you know, work until like five o'clock at least every every night, you know, and so I'd get out of school and I'd come home and I'd have a couple hours of free time, and usually I'd run around with the the the other kids around the apartment buildings. And of course, within you know, by fifth grade, from third to fifth grade, you know, I'm just making friends, but around fifth grade, I uh um I don't even know where I really learned my lifestyle from, but like stealing things from the stores to you know to smoking cigarettes to to drinking alcohol by the time I was in like fifth grade. And just a young age, you know, and I I think it's just really from seeing my parents do it, you know. And uh so I ended up uh at fifth grade, you know, I'm uh at my friend Jeff's house, a really good friend of mine, um, and he uh we used to just hang out and we used to listen to a lot of music together, and you know, you get into that secular music, and and back in the day it was like uh listening to some ice cube death certificate. I remember coming home in like fifth or sixth grade with a with a cassette tape, and the the music store let me buy it, you know, at that age. You know, it was crazy. They they'd sell that stuff to you, and it has you know explicit lyrics and all that stuff on it, and so I just remember uh bringing that tape home and you know, bumping that music, and my mom's like, what the heck is this? And and I'm like, What? It's just what we listen to, and she's like, nah. And like, because she heard all the cuss words in it, you know, and and I was pretty I was pretty sad because that was the first cassette tape that I ever bought was an ice cube death certificate, and uh, you know, on the cover, it's got a guy toe-tagged and stuff. It's just like they sold this stuff to kids back then. The world was different then in the like early 90s and and all that. So didn't really think anything of it, but um our minds, you know, kind of got corrupted at a young age, and you know, parents drank, smoked, that's what we did, and um so so, anyways, my mom ended up making me take that tape back to the store. I think she yelled at the people that sold it to me and made me take the tape back. But uh, she always cared for me, she always showed love. Um, my mom was very loving. Uh, my dad was when he didn't wasn't drinking. Um otherwise, he just uh he was more focused on on his alcohol, alcohol problem and uh his gambling than he was his family, which was kind of sad. But uh as I get older, we're going through like my teenage years. Um like my mom told me about God, you know, a little bit, and and my mom and my grandma uh they're Catholic. Uh my mom's the Mexican side of my family, and uh so so I never really got into you know the whole Catholic thing and all that stuff, but uh I knew that there was a God and and uh um we never really went to church a whole lot or anything. Um but uh so it wasn't till like so sixth grade, seventh grade, eighth grade. I mean, I just ran the streets, you know, kind of ran with all my friends. My friends were always older, so like when I was 11 years old, my friends were all usually like 13, 14. Um, and even when I got into to high school, all my friends were like 18 years old, and I'm 15, 16 years old, you know. So I always ran with the older bunch, and uh, because all the kids my age, they didn't, you know, really do what we were doing. They didn't drink, they didn't smoke, they didn't run around the streets stealing stuff out of cars, stealing cars, like um getting into you know fights with a bunch of people. It's just like it was kind of crazy, you know. Like, and so I liked hanging out with that older crowd, plus they uh they always had the alcohol and and they could get it easier. They had you know the cigarettes, the weed, all that kind of stuff. And uh, you know, for I was just lost. I was really lost as a kid. I didn't have no direction I was going, didn't know what I was doing. Um and I was turning out to be just like you know, like I was raised, you know, and in my environment, anyways. And so at 11 years old, um was kind of my first first uh criminal activity that I got caught for, right? And uh so I I I uh I remember that uh it was actually a younger kid that we were with, but uh we we uh he knew of this other kid that him and his family were out of town and and he wanted to go steal like his baseball cards or something and and something else. And I was like, I was a little older, and I was like, I don't want to steal no baseball cards. And and anyways, we ended up going to this house, and uh he he got us in there and we went through like the garage and then we went up in the house and we're looking through and I wanted to steal like I was like let's take the stereo system and let's take you know things more of like a higher value, I thought, you know, and and then we found keys and he's like, Oh, we got keys to the car, and I was like, Oh, I know how to drive because I learned how to drive when I was like 10, you know, here in Montana. You go to the mountains, and that's what you do. And uh so at 11 years old, we jump in this car and and I'm driving, and I'm just driving around town, going around the blocks, and it's just right before, you know, like dawn, it's dawn, it's like right before night, and uh so there it was still light and people could see in the car. And I just happened to drive by a cop, you know, and the cop cop immediately pulls me over, and uh I didn't know what to do. I was thinking about running. I was like, we gotta run, we gotta run. I was like, I'm gonna go around the block as fast as I can. We're gonna jump out and I'm gonna run, you know. And I was like, get out of the car and just run to this other kid, and uh and uh the kid got scared. He's like, no, no, no, no, I don't want to, and I was like, and then I didn't know what to do, so I just went around the block, stopped, and then I knew that we were busted, right? So and I'm I thank God for these like these little things, you know. Even the things that happened, I thank God that he spared me through all this because things could have gone so much different, you know. And in any event that happened in my life, God had his hand on me. And I don't know how many times I can look back and say, God saved me from something right there, you know, time and time again. And uh, so that that was at 11 years old, was kind of my first uh getting in trouble, getting put on probation, and uh, you know, the start of of my uh I guess being in the system. I was in this I've been in the system for a long time. Um and so so around uh 11 years old is when it started. Um, you know, up until I was 13. Uh just kept drinking, doing drugs, a lot of weed smoking, um, all the way until 15. Um, you know, kind of the same lifestyle. Drinking, smoking, getting in trouble with my mom, kind of running away from home, coming back, um stealing cars. Uh usually we would just go carjacking, right? So, like usually we'd just be out, and even then, man, just like crazy things because we were we were running around from north to south, town of uh Missoula here, and you know, stealing things out of cars, whether it be money, whether it be sometimes we found guns, like we had gun collection full of stuff we found, uh out of cars, uh stereo systems, like just stealing stuff out of cars, right? Because they people leave their doors open. And uh it just became like an every almost like an every weekend thing, like, hey, let's go jack cars this weekend, you know. And um, so looking back, it's just like I don't know that's why that's what we did, but we didn't have nothing better else to do, I guess. And uh and getting into different drugs, you know, by the time I was 15, um there wasn't a whole lot of stuff like meth around, crystal meth back then. It was more or less like we were all on the same page where hey, we like to drink, we like to smoke, you know, smoke weed, and then um and then like mushrooms came around and acid and all these things, and and we were just really experimenting, you know, but but uh as I got older, it's uh you know, I don't know how it became so so uh just doing it all the time, you know, like it's like that was part of our lifestyle. And then um at 15 I got I got in some trouble. Um I used to drive a lot because I you know I knew how to drive, so um I never really got caught for a lot of stuff, but the things I did get caught for um kept me in trouble, kept me in the system. And uh just a trouble kid, I guess, um growing up. And like teenage years, 15-ish, I got sent away. Um I got in some trouble. I think I was drinking, driving. Um, I ended up getting a minor in possession for alcohol, driving with no license and some other stuff. And uh, and I had I had never got off probation from the time I stole in that car. And so the you know, they were they were looking at my just past history, a lot of drinking, getting in trouble, minor in possessions, and I got sent away to Aspen Youth Alternatives, which is a it's a wilderness program. Um and uh, you know, out there it's like you you basically do an internship, and this is when I was 15, almost 16 years old, and uh you do an internship uh for the first two months. It's basically two months of getting ready to go to the wilderness, two months in the wilderness, and then two months uh in residential before you come home, right? And uh it's kind of it's uh it's another option besides going to like Pine Hills, which is a youth uh it's like a youth prison, pretty much, you know. And so I I took that option, and I like the woods anyways, so um I took that option and uh you know I I feel like every every kid should have to go through that just because it teaches you a lot, you know. Not only does it uh you can go out there and survive in the wilderness for two months, but you learn how to do like bow and drill fires, churt and steel fires. You you learn skills that most kids don't even have these days, right? Like if they don't have a lighter to start a fire, they don't know how to make a fire, right? And so I just thought it was a really good program, but at the time I I could care less, right? So I get out of there and um I moved to Bozeman uh for a couple years with my dad. Um my mom started calling the cops on me because I was I would run away, you know. She'd call me in as a runaway, and uh I just wanted to go hang out with my friends and and do whatever, you know, run around the streets pretty much. Um and so so I I'd go live with my dad for a little bit, and my dad would kind of like kind of get a little stricter, and then I go back, live with my mom, and I jump back and forth a little bit, but um at 16 my dad ended up moving to Bozeman, and uh it's about I don't know, four hours away from Missoula or so. And uh so we lived there and I lived there for two years and in Bozeman um it was kind of the same thing. Like I didn't I didn't have a I didn't wasn't trying to get a job or anything for the first I don't know like six months of my life there. And uh and I would uh I I ended up hooking up with some people there that lived in the the trailer court that we lived in, and um got into a lot of other drugs. I was getting a little older, I was like 16, 17 then, and uh and so it got more into like the you know selling drugs and stuff, and and there was everything there pretty much, you know. Uh still not a whole lot of like meth and stuff around, like there was for a minute at one point, but it was uh mushrooms, acid, same thing, opiates and uh weed, alcohol, just partying nonstop for about six months. straight and then Bozeman it was it was more of a like we fought we fought a lot almost every weekend you know the Lord the Lord saved me from a lot in there because every weekend we had a fight going on whether it was one on one or whether it was 10 on one or or like it was almost like like we were a gang there almost because I remember there was times where people broke into well first we went to someone else's house kind of had a rival uh rival click or whatever you want to call them just a bunch of other people that you know we didn't align with and and uh I remember going over there and doing stupid stuff like they said something or did something and and we made some Molotovs and we went to their side of town and opened up their truck and threw a bunch of Molotovs in their vehicle and just lit it on fire you know and uh it was crazy like that like I don't even know my mentality like it was just like I didn't care right I I really didn't care because I was young and I was just like I was almost suicidal at a point um most of my teenage years um I I was just from my parents being divorced and and I think the alcohol didn't help a lot and a lot of times I would get you know I would be drinking and I didn't really care if I lived or died.

SPEAKER_00 23:30

I didn't know Jesus Christ I didn't know um that anybody loved me really I I didn't think anybody loved me it's like nobody cared so why why should I care right yeah that was kind of like your whole like mindset growing up or you know just trying to it sounds to me like you know you grew up and kind of were set up for failure no you know just by those three memories that you talked about in the very beginning and then hearing about your early life your childhood and just going down this direction you know of alcohol and drugs and everything. It's kind of just like what you saw you grew up around and then you know that was the mentality not that you know we're saying we're we condone it or anything like that but that's just the path that you chose you went down because that was what you were seeing and that was what what your mentality ended up shaping and forming into. Right. And so you this is why you you didn't feel loved or you know you or you know you you had the the religion aspect of it right you had the the Catholic one around but you didn't I mean you were not gonna hear it at that point in time. I mean that it came later right you know finding God and everything but yeah there was a lot of different factors going on especially for a young teenager trying to understand all this uh it's a lot to take in you know yeah yeah and there's a ton more I'll I I don't know if I we'd be here for hours if I really got into it all but it's like at that age you know um I remember there was times where I had guns in my mouth ready to pull the trigger you know and just depressed and the alcohol would just bring me down so far and I'd always try to mask my pain with that I would always try to hide behind that and and try to relieve that pain with alcohol or or drugs or anything um and just try to fill that void that you know that God fully fills there's we have this void and we're always trying to grab the things of this world um and and and fill it with that and it's always temporary you know there's there it's God that can fully fill that void and uh and can help you change your life.

SPEAKER_02 25:47

So so at like 18 years old well 17 still um in Bozeman and fighting all the time and and just uh I started working a little bit you know at those ages uh 17 and 18 and detailing cars and doing some fast food stuff and whatnot and trying to change a few things but um really nothing ever changed except for uh you know I had a job and I could have some money and buy more drugs or whatever you know and then I had friends that sold drugs so it was like why that's that's another way to make money it's like why why even work if you can sell stuff and and you know make money here and there and plus you have you have stuff to get high with you know you smoke smoke as much weed as you want if you're selling it and you got pounds of it you know um it just was uh it was just uh the mindset I don't even know a lot of times when I when I think about it it's like uh it's so far behind me like I'm way past it right I don't I don't usually sit here and think about my past too much um I know where I came from and I know where I am today you know and uh but the the past is it's the past and God has uh God has truly just like redeemed me he's uh he's given me a new life and um I man my past is my past you know I try to leave it there but I know I know a lot of people can relate especially with the alcohol and the drugs like just being stuck in that for so many years um I feel like that that was a generational curse uh for for my family like my my dad my dad and my dad's dad and uh and most my mom's side of the family everybody drank you know it's something that was passed down to my generation and um I'll get to it in a minute but like it's God that that breaks those generational curses and it comes down to us making a choice um and so at like 18 I'll go back to there so 18 I'm I'm I get off probation in in uh Bozeman for a couple years well for two years I think it was but when I got off probation in Bozeman I moved over here to the Bitteret which is just south of Missoula where I was originally raised um and and uh over here is my mom's whole side of the family so so it was just time to get away I was trying to trying to make a change and then uh one of my closest cousins lives here Chris and uh and um he's like my brother you know we grew up his little kids together you know off and on uh grew up together and so he's more like my brother and uh he's the other half of broken chains and uh so it's me and Chris that do the the the music you know and and so I move over here and I move in with my my uncle Dale and Aunt Verge and and my cousin Chris and and um I'm 18 years old and and I'm still doing the same stupid stuff we're running around I make a bunch of friends here you know and doing the same stupid stuff getting into the same stupid things and uh drugs alcohol partying and and just getting to know people around here a lot of my family lives here I got a I got a pretty big uh Mexican side of my family and and they've been here for a long time but my my grandma had uh like 17 kids well I got a lot of aunts and uncles and I got hundreds of cousins. I believe it yeah big Mexican families you know and uh it just uh they a lot of a lot of them I don't I mean I don't talk to a whole lot of them I I I pray for them all you know but it's like you don't even know half your cousins because you don't really you know you got so many of them yeah and anyways uh the ones I do I'm I'm very close with you know that that uh that have uh changed their lives or they lean into God or they they they come to me and and ask you know for for advice or my opinion or you know maybe a prayer whatever it is it's like um it it I like how I love how God works like that he just brings he brings people to you and uh and so anyways cut off probation for a couple years there at 18 till about 20 and um anyways I I still drank still did everything started getting into uh um let's see 20 years old 21 drinking more a little bit of the bars even before I was 21 never really cared for bars much um preferred just hanging out with the homies and you know having a big house party or something you know and and so we are uh getting into stuff i one night I got I got a a felony um car theft wasn't even necessarily a car theft on that one but I don't want to minimize it but uh you know my friend's mom used to let me use her car but I was drunk one night put my car in a ditch and that's kind of where I got put back on probation um as an adult because I got off as soon as I turned 18 about two years no probation and then at 20 basically 20 I uh I got a felony car theft and I didn't have no money to fight it you know or anything and my my friend's mom didn't even press charges uh but the state did and so it put me back in the system as an adult now and um I was I was pretty angry I've been angry you know most of my life I've just been a really angry person and uh and so I get that felony car theft and uh it puts me on probation for like another three years. Well I get in in trouble again within those three years um uh felony assault and that gives me another like 10 years and then I get a uh felony duy and it just keeps adding time to my sentence right and so I get three duys pretty much within a few years and uh drinking and driving man uh I I I didn't really care what I did where I was at what I was doing when I was drinking I did whatever I wanted and and you know went wherever I wanted um it it really it was really uh damaging on my life uh and and it kept me in the system um for a lot of years because I I chose the alcohol and I I chose everything of this world over over God over over anything um and so so I'm uh I I got a 25 my last sentence was 25 years 15 suspended and that was for a DUI my fifth DUI and uh throughout all this time also I guess if I look back at it I've been to prison twice so Montana State prison I've been there twice I did like six months one time I did uh two years and eight months on the last time um I've been through several programs uh I've been through the watch program which is a nine month program for alcohol uh DUIs and then uh I've been through the prison boot camp also twice once in 2003 and once in 2013 and um if you don't know like any military boot camp that's basically what prison boot camp is but you're locked up and it's it's still a voluntary program but um they it it's a very good program I think it's shut down now but uh in 2003 it was really hard and um you learn discipline you learn honesty you learn you know teamwork you're learning integrity you learn a lot of things that again it's another program it's like man everybody should have to go through this you know what I mean to help teach you those fundamentals and those things in life that that means something to live by you know um and so anyways I've been through that boot camp twice uh and I just never I guess I never really learned you know I I actually was saved in 2001 so um after I got saved and see all the a lot of this stuff happened even after I had uh got saved you know but in 2001 I got saved and uh my cousin Chris uh the one I do music with he he gave his life to the Lord right and I was like I seen a change in him and I'm like I didn't even recognize him like that's how much he changed just his attitude is like he was glowing I'm just like man I want that I just like seeing him and and you know I was like what what did you do? He's like man I gave my life to Jesus and I'm like what and he's like I get like I I don't know where it came from it just came out of nowhere he's like I gave my life to Jesus I don't want I don't want to do anything anymore except for just tell everybody about Jesus and I was like man I want that you know I want that that fire that he had you know and so so anyways he brought me uh he brought me to the Lord pretty much and because I he just had something that I wanted and I seen it and uh we ended up going uh to a church in Missoula and I got saved I got baptized and and uh it's funny because God changed my life at that point he gave me a he put a fire in me that I've never felt before right and so I'm like I come back out you know we're we're hitting the streets we're doing like a um we were doing a uh like an outreach and so we would we would hit Hamilton down here in the valley in the bitter of valley and we would hit north to south town pump and we'd drive and we'd just tell people about Jesus and we'd hand sodas out we'd get a case of Mountain Dew case of Pepsi and we would just tell people about Jesus and what he's done in our lives you know and that's all we did for like months you know and we'd set up at the end of town and we'd have people playing music and doing worship we'd set up a basketball hoop and and we'd run across you know we'd shoot hoops invite people over and just try to reach all the people that were cruising up and down the strip all the all the young kids you know that that were looking for a party or something you know because that's what we used to do. And so for about you know six months there I was just on fire man and uh I just felt this new fire in me and and a new spirit and like it was just it was different than I had ever felt and um there were some things I was trying to bring a friend to Christ and uh and I I basically we were never really discipled too well we were doing little groups and stuff but there was no real discipleship there was a little bit of accountability uh and all that stuff that we were doing and with the group that we were doing it with but uh I started going off on my own trying to reach another friend of mine who I wanted to bring to the Lord and um I didn't take nobody with me um and I was still a baby Christian you know I I didn't I didn't know a whole lot even then it was just like I knew that I had this fire I knew I was saved I knew that my life was different but I wasn't equipped yet to go out there and and go by myself and start bringing people to the Lord I just I wasn't ready and I started hanging out with my friend and you know telling him about what the Lord had done in my life and he still wanted to drink and party and and uh and so I I hung out with him a little bit and it only took uh a little bit of time and I was right back to drinking and doing the same thing that I used to do um and then our our also our our church uh was kind of getting broken up and and you know you see pastors doing things that you're like that's a man of God why is he divorcing his wife or you know like this is our leader like what what's going on here like and then I I I got to a point where I was falling right back into my old life and um I felt like a failure I felt like you know if I can't follow what God's got for me then why even try you know and um because it was too hard you know it people think you get saved and you know give your life to Jesus and and things are gonna get just easier and better. They do get better because you know it's no longer your life you're living it's his and uh you're living it for him and but the enemy just attacks and attacks in different ways and um you know he'll find every crack or gap to to squeeze his way in there. And uh you just got to stand firm but so I fell away from from everything for a while and so did my cousin and obviously I was still I went back to drinking doing drugs all that stuff and uh I got sent away a few times and came back and it was always a cycle for me um I would I would be sober for sometimes for up to a year and next thing you know I'm like oh I can drink with my friends you know and just have a beer and and and then next thing you know I'm drinking you know every weekend and and then every day and then I'm back to you know drowning in my sorrows and and just not caring about life again and uh so anyways I get to uh to a point in my life in in 2011 um and I get my fifth DUI um get in a fight with my friend at the bar run into a cop car um and they tried basically you know they the the judge frowned upon my past record obviously uh seemed like I just never changed and it was a continuous cycle for me and uh um there was even um a point in my life like I probably spent about a year on meth and uh my cousin spent like four years on the stuff and it was it was some of the darker times that I seen in my life where you know you see things happen like people getting kidnapped and you know over drugs and people being thrown in trunks and and even you know you're just like what are we doing in this lifestyle you know and and you're you know you you're you're in a lifestyle that um we're in Montana don't get me wrong like Montana's a pretty safe town but drugs and um people that are serious like like like Isaiah like people that will kill people for not paying them like that stuff was around here and and I mean when you're in the game like that it's it it's you're you're open to it. So I'm I was fortunate enough where I never had to deal with uh anything too crazy. My cousin Chris and and some other people did but it's like the Lord again saved us from that whole um that whole time of of being lost in in that drug for so long and pulled pulled me out of it to where um I could have ended up dead I could have you know there's so many times I could have died in so many different situations and um or just be a drug addict you know that the rest of my life you know like he pulled me out of that and he he gave me everything that I ever prayed for. My wife and my children today like I have I have an amazing wife I have five five amazing children also and uh you know originally when when I prayed um to the Lord for something I I asked for for a wife and a baby boy and he's blessed me with a wife and and uh two boys and and uh three boys and two girls and I got which is like it's all I ever asked for right and and when I got locked up for my last duy I had um my older boys James and Andreas and uh And that was that was where I was just like, like, what am I doing in here again, Lord? Like, why why do I keep coming to jail? Why am I why am I sitting here again with with felonies over my head and and and looking at doing a lot of time, right? And I guess I I just told myself, I was like, Lord, I don't I don't want this life no more. And and I want to live for you, and and if you just help me get through this, um, I didn't even I didn't even ask him to just like get me through it. I said just be with me through this because I knew that I was gonna be doing some time, right? I knew that I was gonna be doing, you know, at least a couple years, and um and so and my boys were like I want to say they're four four and five years old at the time or so. And this is in 2011. And uh and I just uh I just realized that I was going away and and I was gonna lose everything, you know. I I didn't think that my wife was gonna stay with me, you know. I thought that she would leave. Um obviously I was sad I'm gonna gonna miss my kids really bad, and and uh the Lord was with me again, and he helped me through all the jail time that I had to do through the prison time. I did two years again in uh MSP. And um during that time, you know you could get anything in prison that you can get on the street pretty much. Um but I made a commitment to the Lord uh after I sobered up, you know, from my from uh January 1st, 2011, when I got that DUI. Um couple days later, I was you know sobering up, and I'm like, okay. And I made a commitment to the Lord that I wasn't gonna go back to that lifestyle, and I wanted him to just take it all from me, you know. And and there's something about um, so I I call it deliverance, right? Or being set free. Um, the Lord set me free from that, but he he delivered me from alcohol at that point. There was something there when I gave it to him, he took it. I never had to pick that up again after that day. And I knew what I wanted because the Lord had already showed me.

SPEAKER_01 46:41

He's like, I gave you everything you've ever asked for. And uh and I realized that finally because nothing else mattered. Anything material didn't matter. Any anybody else at that point in my life didn't matter except for my wife and my children, and uh and I realized he did, he gave me everything I ever asked for.

SPEAKER_02 47:17

And and uh during those two years um in prison, I could have I could have got all tatted up, I could have there's many times where I was offered weed, you know, pruno, spice, whatever it was, they had all sorts of stuff in there. And uh and I'd always say no. And the reason I'd say no is because I wanted to practice. I wanted to practice saying no and living the way that the Lord wanted me to live, let alone when I got out. Usually I would be like, Yeah, hook me up, let's do that, you know. And and I wanted to practice in there, so when I got out, I didn't go back to that old lifestyle. I didn't want to just be, you know, be the guy that goes right back to the same thing that he just you know got in trouble for. And and so uh so I did those two years, and then the other uh eight months, I basically was in um uh boot camp the second time, uh prison boot camp, and then um and then pre-release for like three or four months, and then they let me come home again. And when I got home, things were way different. Uh I did go back to the same job that I was working, which was concrete, and uh I did that for about a year, and there there was a point where um, and during those two years in prison, I remember I'd walk back and forth in my cell, and I would just you know try to memorize scriptures. Um, the Lord would put certain scriptures on my heart and I'd look them up, and then you you have so much time in prison to uh to focus on the Lord and and other things. There's like no other distractions, right? I mean, there is, but but it very minimal, and so the time that you can uh pace back and forth in a cell, and the time that you like it almost feels like uh like time stops almost, you know, or it goes really slow, but you have you have so much time to to do things and uh reading my Bible and just spending time with the Lord and you know thinking about my family and how I was gonna do things different when I got out uh was was always on my mind, you know. And um, so while I was in prison, also my wife would she actually come up and see me and uh she'd bring my kids, and that was pretty uplifting, and that just that just uh it helped me get through that time, you know. Uh the other thing that helped me through that besides the Lord was uh some of those guys that were in there. Uh I was in there with some lifers that you know they're they ain't never getting out of there, and um, and those guys kept me on a straight path where you know they helped me get a job out in like uh the lumber yard and and all sorts of stuff, man. Just uh keeping me on the right path. And then um they they knew I was only doing a couple years, so um they would always say, you know, you get out of here, I don't ever want to see you back here again because a lot of guys go right back, you know, guys get out and they go right back. It's like they they like being there or something. And uh and I told them, I says, I will not be back, I promise you that. And they're like, You better not be, or you know what's gonna happen, you know. And I'm like, Yeah, yeah, I understand. They're they're great guys, but like uh big Sean, big Dave, uh Eli, and just some of them guys would would be uh so encouraging. And the the one thing that I saw in there, those guys, uh they were all believers, right? But those guys uh they seem freer inside than most of the people out here that are actually free, like they're free, like they might have been in prison the rest of their life, but they had Jesus, and they they like they knew that they were gonna be there for the rest of their life, but they were free inside, man. And uh, and there's nothing like that, like to be to be in prison, but to be free, and and they're they're more real than half the cats out here on the streets, you know. It's like they just had it and and they knew it. And uh I'm I'm just thankful for those guys, man, for for helping me through there and and just keeping me on a path, you know, that that got me back home to my family.

SPEAKER_00 52:04

And uh I was gonna say what did happen when you got out, like what was your life like since because that now up until you got out?

SPEAKER_02 52:12

Yeah, yeah. It's kind of mostly what I wanted to talk about. Um it's hot in my house. Um, all right, so let's start in 2013 real quick, and we'll try to run through this. Uh 2013, I got home. Um, my wife had bought a trailer for us, had to do some remodeling. We lived in that for oh about seven years. Um, from 2013 till uh whatever seven years is 2017 or no, 20. Maybe she bought it before that was 2009. Sorry. Anyways, 2013, I came home. Um, so I'd I'd been sober, I'd been sober for over 13 years, since uh January 1st of 2011. I haven't drinked since. And uh same thing with any other drugs or anything, clean and sober, and all glory to God. And it was uh it was a choice I had to make, and uh it was also like I said, giving it to God and um letting him take it so that I didn't have to pick it up again. It wasn't mine no more, you know. I gave it to him, and uh and he freed me from that. Um, so in 2013, and the the awesome thing is in that first year, um you get back home and you're like, oh man, this is great, and things are going good. You start working, and and things are going good, family life's good, you get to see your wife, you see your kids, and you know, hug them, kiss them every day, and and it's just like life is good, and and then you you realize that it's still real life, and you you have uh, you know, you have a spouse that you um need to learn to compromise with and and um communicate with and and just a lot more than you think, and you're still growing in the Lord, you know, and and trying to figure it out. And I didn't go back to drinking or anything, but I'll tell you within the the first year and just a couple small arguments um or things that just didn't go my way, uh you have thoughts, you know, you have you get a craving, or you have a thought of drinking, or going back to it again, and then you're like, why why would you have that? The Lord delivered me from that. And uh I want to say in the first year, I think I had two or three cravings, and um I was able to stop and think about the like what was happening and not go to my to my old uh to my old ways, right? And which was which was awesome. I realized I was like, wow, I was like, that's the first I real I realized those cravings used to drive me straight to go get a beer or go to the store, like or jump in my truck and just take off and go do you know what I usually did. And I didn't do that. I didn't do that, and and I I thank God for that. It's like um so so we're uh we're living in a trailer, we're doing well, working. I I quit concrete. Uh my cousin wanted me to start driving a truck, and I didn't want to drive, I didn't have a license yet. Trying to get my license back, do everything legal, uh kind of like an adult should, you know, like get your driver's license, get insurance, and and be legal and and do all the growing up stuff. And my wife has helped me a lot with that. Uh but um so so I'm I quit concrete and I went into building and I I built for a company for um eight years about, and uh and so in 20 was it, 2021. Um after eight years, I I've been going to church and everything, you know. Every Sunday I was a Sunday churchgoer and Wednesdays and whatnot. And you know, you go warm the warm the seats up and keep them warm every Sunday and you know worship God and and you know just uh it was almost like it kind of felt like a checklist, right? And um, I think it was just I I wasn't really building that relationship with God. I was going to church and I think I would have been, you know, just fine, but there was no building a relationship um with my savior at the time, you know, to where I was growing, and it was almost like a there at one point it was like a time of being stagnant almost, like there just was nothing, like you're you're just at one point and not growing any. And so, anyways, uh we are oh, where was that? So in 2021, um, I had fallen off a building, right? And uh 14 feet fall, uh fell uh off a second floor, um, broke my hip, broke my wrist, my knee, my kneecap, and my nose. And and it was uh it was a scary time. I I I didn't know if I would ever walk again. I didn't know what was gonna happen, and uh I had a concussion um for for uh I don't know a couple days anyways, and I kept repeating things, and my wife family was scared, thought I was you know, they didn't know if I was alive or dead, or they were running to the hospital and and checking. My wife thought I could die or something, and uh I was just broken up really bad, right? And uh it was something that that you know a lot of people would blame God, they'd be like, you know, why'd God do this to me? I hate God or whatever. And I was already in a pretty good place, and when I had come out of that concussion and like and realized where I was at, I was I was uh rejoicing that I was alive. I was I was I was praising the Lord that I was alive and that you know like this happened for a reason, right? And and it did. The Lord showed me, you know, over the after I got out of the hospital and I I got to come home and um and start healing up, he he showed me that this happened to change the direction in my life, but it gave me time to heal, not just my my physical body that was all broke up, but uh, but heal from my past, you know, um start to forgive, you know, uh forgive my dad for the way that you know he raised me or the things that he did, or you know, um, I had a lot of resentment towards him, um, some towards my mom, and I had a lot of forgiving to do for anybody that's hurt me or or even myself. Um, I needed to forgive myself. And so I spent about eight months out of work, and uh during those eight months, I I uh I had a lot of time to heal and to grow, and and that's exactly what I did. And in those those months, the first uh four months, um Isaiah Bloncas was uh I had met Isaiah before this, but uh Isaiah Bloncas called me up and he's he was like, Hey Carnal, he's like he's like, You ready to start doing Bible studies and and uh do some discipleship? And I'm like, I'm like, man, like most pastors ain't called my pastor in my church here. I I love to death, but like Isaiah Bloncas called me, and he he's like, we need to do discipleships, and and uh he'd call me every Tuesday or every Thursday and whenever we could, at least once a week, and we would do discipleships over the phone. And and I was grateful for that because that's what that time was for. It was to grow, you know, and and become stronger, and to realize that you know, you know, God doesn't just love us, but he he wants a relationship with us, he wants to, he wants to talk to us, he wants to communicate with him, and he wants to show us things and tell us things, and and just for us to be um to be aware and to not only know him, but to let others know about him. And and I think that's one of the you know biggest things in my life is first to know him and then to make him known. Those are two of the biggest things in my life, and uh so so when I fell, I ended up going back to work the year later, and uh, and it was it was harder to do things. I don't I don't move as fast as I used to, and and uh I I ended up uh there were some disagreements at that job, and so I ended up praying, praying, uh, you know, and I was with that company for eight years, but I ended up praying, and I prayed for 10 days straight because I didn't know what was going on, and it was just you know, you either act off of your feelings, um, you act off of uh emotions, or you're you're gonna you know pray and see what the Lord says, right? And I prayed for 10 days on this uh this job, and uh and it it was time to go, the Lord said, and he said, Trust me. He's like, take a leap of faith, trust me, and he's like, I will provide for you, and but you have to trust me. And um, and I was like, Okay, Lord. I was like, after 10 days of praying, I'm like, okay. And then I came home one day and I was talking to my wife, and um, and then I I totally changed. I know I knew what the Lord said to me, but I was like, no, I helped build this company, you know. We're we're uh we're stable, you know. It's like it's like we got, you know, we're we're we got we're stable, we have nothing to worry about, you know, we're comfortable. Like, why would I leave this company? And I had made some good friends there, some brothers that we we uh shed blood, sweat, and tears together, you know, for eight years. And and he said, he said it was time to go. And I'm sitting there talking to my wife, and I was like, nah, never mind. I was like, forget that. I'm staying at my job, or I'm not leaving, you know. And she's like, that is not what God told you. That's not what you told me that God told you. And and I was like, man, that's not what God told me. And and I ended up being obedient to what God said, and um, I left that job, and I didn't know what God had for me. You know, I hadn't been out on my own, you know, as for work and everything. And it's like the biggest thing was being obedient and doing what he asked, and because I wanted to not just I wanted to please man, you know, I wanted I didn't want to just leave my my buddies hanging, you know, at my job. And the thing is, it wasn't about uh my job, it wasn't about anything except for being obedient to God and trusting whatever it is that He has for me when I left. And I did that, and it was like the the world was lifted off my shoulders, right? And it was such a feeling that um I didn't I didn't care about anything else, I didn't care if I let somebody down because like the Bible says we're not here to please, we shouldn't be pleasing man, we should be pleasing God. And um, when you're obedient to God, you're pleasing God. And so I took that step, and uh and it's been great since. Like, not only I wasn't growing when I was at that job, maybe a little bit, but it wasn't like I'm growing now. Like, there's things that the Lord has spoken to me over the last even the last two years um that I would have never heard because my ears weren't open, because I wasn't focusing on on what God had for me. I was focused on what the world had for me in a way, you know. And um so I uh I left that job and uh God gave me a business, he he's like open up your own business and start that. So I started that. Um and uh it's been good since. I don't I don't work more than you know than I have to. And um it's it's crazy because I don't really go looking for work, it just comes to me and and uh the Lord just provides like He said He would. He's faithful. And and so I'm I'm like sometimes I'm like man, I was like, I need some work. I need to make some money. We got bills to pay or something. But like every single time, the Lord provides. And He always has. I've been I'm I'm really big in tithing. So I mean, the Lord's only asking for 10%. He's not asking for 90. He's giving us 90. And so like money was a big thing I had to let go of. And he took from me when I gave it to him. But but uh otherwise I thought money was mine, like, oh I made this money. This money's mine, you know. But uh I gave that to God and I don't even worry about finances anymore. The Lord just provides. And and that, especially tithing, I can say um giving him um our first fruits and giving him our um our tithes uh has helped me trust God even more, you know, because I see I see that he just he gives he gives back tenfold, you know, hundredfold. It's like it's like I don't even know how it happens sometimes. You know what I mean? Like so somehow money just falls out of the sky. I don't know. It's it's it's literally a job comes, he's like, here, use your hands, that's what I gave him for, and the bills are paid. Amazing.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:22

Um I see what you're saying, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:24

Yeah, yeah. And so uh let's see. So I uh fell off the building, got hurt. Um Lord saved my life again. Um it's just like I I never I never felt like I deserved anything, you know. And um at one point, um the Lord just let me know that you know I'm a I'm a child of God, I'm a I'm a son of God, and um that's what he created me to be, you know. And and I for for me and my family, like as for me and my house, we're gonna serve the Lord and I'm gonna be obedient to God, whatever he's telling me. I want to be able to hear his voice clearly, and um we we stay rooted in our Bibles and and uh just stay focused, keep uh keep our focus on him. Um in Montana, I know like we don't we don't do the like the Lord hasn't called us to go necessarily um do like a church in the alley, kind of like El Paso chapter and all that. Um but anytime Isaiah comes up here, like we're traveling with him. Um the Lord has just having my own business, the Lord has provided so that when he is here, usually uh once a year, sometimes twice. Last year he was here twice, and we traveled to uh several different cities, and um we ended up going up to a reservation this last year, uh Box Elder, and uh and we get to go around and we get to share testimony there, right? And the Lord always for for me, it's like it's weird because um he always gives me something different to share at different times, and it's not always the same testimony. I I have such a long, long testimony, honestly. When you when I dive into it, it's like I don't even know what to share. I just pray that the Lord is uh allowing me to share what needs to be shared, and uh and and and I don't know, there's been a lot of growth in the last last year or two, and um it's kind of like figuring out the puzzle pieces, right? Like he gave me a uh analogy one uh not too long ago, actually, and it's just like I don't know if you you do puzzles at all, but uh me and my kids do, and uh my wife and and he gave me this analogy one time of like the puzzle pieces, and you know how we uh we're putting the puzzle together, you know, the more people you have, usually the more eyes and hands you got on it, and uh and and the more you're able to get it done a little faster and find pieces, and usually you do the outside first and and get the border on and and then start working into the middle, and and uh well he just showed me that these puzzle pieces uh they go in certain places, and sometimes we'll we'll be putting a puzzle together, and there's one piece of that puzzle, and and you're you go to put it in and it looks like it fits, it's like the same shape, and you're like that's gotta go there, it's the same color, and and it you push it in and and you push it a little harder and it goes in. You're like, Yep, that's it. And what you don't realize is you can't complete that puzzle uh because that piece is in the wrong place, right? And so so it takes a minute, but you figure it out, and that that piece um has to come out and be moved to where it goes. And so my life's been like that. It's like figuring out where the pieces are going and and where the Lord is placing um placing everything and then trying to figure it out because I just want to I I want to know God more, I want to understand God more, and um I want to do what He's asking me to do. You know, I don't there there's nothing better than obedience to God. Um that's that's true worship, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:40

Yeah, well uh Brian, I do uh I really did enjoy your testimony today, man. You have a phenomenal one, man, and I think that you have uh grown a lot since uh when we started, you know, like you started in the very beginning and just really went on with your testimony. And man, I'm glad you were able to uh be able to grow in such a way to where you can now spread spread the word through the music that you make, and even with like you said, when with the Gangsters for Jesus, the whole outreach thing when Isaiah comes in and you guys do it like that, and just to be able as well to be in relationship with God and to do do that with your family and stuff. I mean, all of that is a big blessing in itself, man. And I think that with your testimony, I'm glad you were able to uh give me the opportunity to be able to platform it and share it out there and with people, man, because I think that it will it can connect a lot with the people that came from a broken home or alcoholic family, or um, you know, people that may have struggled with uh you know alcoholic addiction or you know, you know, like you hit touched on meth a little bit as well, and yeah, other drugs and stuff like that, man. There's a lot of people that can relate to these kind of testimonies and the things that you were involved with, man. So do you want to say a little prayer, pray us out for the people that maybe struggling in those kind of areas?

SPEAKER_02 1:13:06

Yeah, let's do that. Uh Father God, I just thank you again for this opportunity, Lord. I just ask that you're uh you just open your ears and hearts right now, Father God, for anybody that uh hears this testimony, Father God, or any other one on here, Lord, that uh it can just that the Lord that you can change our lives, Father God. We just thank you for uh for this day you've given us uh Lord. Uh let us be willing vessels for you, Father. Let us be ready for whatever it is that you have for us. Um, Lord, we know that it's you that can help us conquer addiction and anything else in our life, depression, anxiety, any of those things, Father God, if we look to you and we give it to you, you will take it. And we just thank you, Father God, for uh for where you have us today. Um, Lord, we know that we we came from uh a broken home or or uh uh just a life of of crime, Lord, where where we wanted to change, Lord, and that that it was only you that could do that, Father God. We tried everything else, we've tried to fill that void with everything else, but it's only you who truly fills that. I thank you, Father God, for all you've done for us, for for your son, sending your son, and we thank you for forgiving us, Father God. Um, I pray that uh this podcast just be blessed, Lord, that your hand be up on it. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:29

Amen. Brian faced a very difficult upbringing, yet he made a very life-changing decision to give his life to God, and the transformation is nothing short of extraordinary. He is now on a powerful and positive path, filled with hope and purpose. My prayer is that this story reaches someone in need and inspires real, lasting change. Please comment if you feel moved by Brian's testimony. Share this powerful message with someone who may benefit from it. Like this video to show your support for Brian's journey. Don't forget to hit the subscribe and notification button so you don't ever miss another inspiring testimony. Please be sure to explore the testimony playlist that'll pop up at the end of this video. On that, you can see all the testimonies I've covered in the past. Thank you again so much for watching, and of course, we'll see everyone on the next one.