3 In The Middle Podcast
Chatting Carlisle United, football nonsense, honest opinions & star guests 🎙️🎧
3 In The Middle Podcast
"I predict a diet' (Part 2) - Tales of a Kitman
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Part 2 of the 3 In The Middle Easter release sees the show's first guest make an appearance after multiple requests from followers.
Don't expect to hear much from the lads as they struggle to get a word in edgeways as Andy 'Bus Head' Horn, former Carlisle United kitman, bus driver and ever present sideliner covers a fraction of his ten years at the club.
Stories including meeting Michael Knighton for the first time, subbing Scott Dobie off whilst he was on a hat trick and going AWOL mid game to order fish and chips are just some of the tales covered.
Right. Now a special is it a treat? Is it a treat? It is. We've got a guest who's been mentioned a few times on these pods. She's got a story or two. Um so right, Bushead, aka Andy Horn. Tales of a Kit Man. Carl United Kitman. Wanna join us? Round of applause. Round of applause. Clear your throat. Hi lads. How are you doing? I like it. Right. So let's just sit back and enjoy this. Kip Man. Kitman struck a coach driver for Carl United what years?
SPEAKER_00The idea.
SPEAKER_012001.
SPEAKER_00Who did you start with? 2000's 2010 to 2000. You wouldn't. No, 2001. 2001? Yeah. 2001. 2010. Who brought you in? Roddy Collins. I was just the I was just the coach driver and we didn't have a kit man. And Roddy Collins came in and they said, Would you like the kitman's job? Did he did he ask you or did he say he tell you? No, I asked it. He must have a few stories about him. Yeah. First time, first time I drove, Michael Knight was in the stand and my my seat was next to him. And I sat down next to Michael Knight and he went, Who are you? And I went, Who are you? Did he not come on the coach? No, he didn't that do, no. That was uh I think where was that? Somewhere bizarre down Cambridge or somewhere. Somewhere down.
SPEAKER_01I want to know. Quick the kit men now, they've got a lot more help, haven't they? Was you just a one-man band?
SPEAKER_00Oh, one man band. It was all on your own. Everything, yeah, it's just like just what was he like to deal with before we go any further? Class. Was he? Yeah. He didn't pay us to say that. Oh no, Squares. That squad was class. It's just like the the memories from that, just like memories you'll never ever find.
SPEAKER_01I told them in the Olympic Dermot story and he snatched the strip off the and the reszies in the you went, don't be in a move with me. You're only fortunate you're on the bench because my alley's playing.
SPEAKER_00He was fuming he starmed out the room, you rang his dad. Get me out of here. Get man slaughtered us in the Zezzies.
SPEAKER_01So yeah, so what was the biggest? I know you had pet hit when the lads started cutting their socks about 2007.
SPEAKER_00When did that start? Is when it was starting, yeah? The thing is, when you're in a uh club with like not a lot of budget, like every you you didn't like to waste kit with it like that. Me throwing your shirts in the crowd, me big time like that. It's like just coming off and that, and then like like everything's on the budget, and uh it's just you try to protect everything, and like when people left the club, you said can all the kit pass.
SPEAKER_01I remember one time Steve Chris Billy had been on the way and he took his top off and he thought he's gonna throw it in the crowd. He's like, No, Steve's got a laugh, didn't he? He's like, ah, I'm showing her. Do you want me to ask you some questions on that? Yeah, got a five. Go on then. Best ground.
SPEAKER_00Club, Anfield, obviously, Wembley. It's every pinnacle to get to Wembley and in. Yeah. Driving the bus underneath that uh coach, or isn't it? Bus. Driving the coach underneath that uh stadium. It's uh big ground, big games as well, then. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01So who'd you do Anfield with?
SPEAKER_00Uh no. Uh Carl, uh youth team, the youth team. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, youth team got there. Oh, is that well that's from Kirky Britain? I don't know. They dropped you in for the youth team game. Oh, that was a big game, that wasn't it must have been in Bear Yogans.
SPEAKER_01Yours right from the number that because he was fuming. He went, I'm bigger than the youth team.
SPEAKER_00Houston. Yeah, so uh yeah, Anfield and obviously Wembley. Best changing rooms? Same again, Anfield Wembley. What about the mighty Brunton Park?
SPEAKER_01I wish I had them like that now. He couldn't help himself, could he? The other day when we went in and got a tour, I was like, ah, no, the hat down there. You organise me. Uh biggest wanker on the opposing bench, because he used to get involved. No, I did. Simmo used to tell them all. John Moore didn't like it, did he? Remember me and you nearly had hunts in the tunnel. That was a lead, though. I couldn't get to him. Russell Slade. Russell Slade?
SPEAKER_00Yeah. Nob tell us what you really. Yeah. He met he met he met the we were battering them. I had a carry member who was manager of, and he made them sit on the centre circle for half-time. Oh, did he? Yeah. I didn't realise that.
SPEAKER_01I thought, oh, that was the boy who'd done that at Stope as well, wasn't it? Phil Brown, didn't it? Oh, a whole show. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I thought you don't do that like that.
SPEAKER_00Nah, I didn't know. His first show, on it as well. So yeah, Russell's laid Lee Johnson. Lee Johnson. Small man. Absolutely. Just like he's always involved.
SPEAKER_01He's always involved with something, don't he? And I know it's something watching a lot of these interviews.
SPEAKER_00Kevin. Kev Grey went some through somebody at Bristol City and like small man Stryndrome came out and he said to his brand, Break is fucking left.
SPEAKER_01Gary Johnson. I didn't break his alright. No, no, you're I was better dick as well.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. And the last one, John Sheridan, like an angry man.
SPEAKER_01I know he's meant to be alright. Cheers off the pit. Well, he is.
SPEAKER_00Well, that's it for his brother, didn't I?
SPEAKER_01He's an angry man as well, does 90 minutes and angry and he hated John Sheridan, hated like the media side of it. What do they? And he just used to come up and go, I'll just hurry up. Really big win, and he was hammering them. I hammering. Was it? It was funny. There was loads of leaks within the club. Not gonna say what it was who dictated it. But he went. So someone's he's getting interviewed, and he went, and he went, Do the lads know about it? He went, No, I've taught you, and I know you tell them. Oh is that? I've seen that. That's unbelievable. He went, the lads are overweight and that. I think Danny Greenja told me coffee some it and said back, he was fuming, wasn't he? And to be fair to Danny, we're 6-0 up. I know. And you're still on them. Tell us uh I want to know this. Tell them the similar story at Scarborough.
SPEAKER_00So still trauma. So going back to what you said before, you did absolutely everything, like kit drove the coach. Uh, and I was also like, because I knew the numbers in my head, well, I thought I did. Um I used to be responsible to have the substitution cards. So Simon's wanting to make a substitution at half time. I've there's a back door at Scarborough, I've sneaked out the back door, and I'm putting the pizza and fish and chip short. And Simo's going, Why the fuck's boss then? I want to make a substitution. So, because it was quite a long order, it took like quite a long time, huh? He's just getting madder and madder. And there's one. So I've sneaked in the back door. Well, there wasn't correct. Yeah, but yeah, so that that was the scarborough one. Did you tell him what you were doing? Or did you make something up?
SPEAKER_01He just didn't probably panicked. Yeah. I was pissed off because him and Kieran Westwood had worked themselves that day and I'd scored a last-minute equaliser. So when I was getting off the bus, I was expecting, like, no, he's pulled them too. Kieran, not professional off in him. You're more interested in mushy peas and curry sauce.
SPEAKER_00But well, that was that was one of my bollocks. Along with I don't think it was many men being sent off, but Mark Klattenberg sent us off in the tunnel. Dead. Yeah, called him a cheating, see. He just pulled a red card out of you. So what did you I had to sit in the dressing room for the second half? Where he said, Did you get that? We're going, Sim was gonna kill him. And he did. Well, yeah, it was that I must know. Was it Middlesbrough? In it Middlesbrough in the friendly uh in a summary. Did you get a two-match ban? Did you get a match ban? No, I didn't get a match five back, wouldn't it? But yeah, I like I was always responsible for memorabilia as well, getting that sign for the sponsor and everything. And somebody kept signing the balls, Pele. Oh what's it you? I never actually got lads. Will you stop signing Pele on the balls? Like that. Was it you?
SPEAKER_01You must have got a bulletin about sometimes you could come in and write fettle, couldn't you? Yeah. If someone had a goat at you the day. How's it your folk? So he came in. He's just talking to someone, talking to her. And I'm walking the physical, all I've heard is and go, Oh, who's fucking signed the ball, Pele?
SPEAKER_00And then and the And then if Danny Graham got involved. Oh, Dan Danny, like Did we kick them over the fence? Aye, so at the end, like when the season finished, I used to get as many balls signed as I could in the many. So when the lads were coming in to see the manager, I was like in reception with this big table, I was getting all the balls signed. Danny walked in. I said, Danny, we'll be assigned as them place. He got every ball and punted it into the fucking little big club. And people have no Brunton Park, behind just like get over that fence. You've got to walk round by Warwick Road, all the way up to the Ruby ground. Just like Danny punted them right over there.
SPEAKER_01So go farm broad drill. How many know?
SPEAKER_00Farm Bradrill, yeah. Me and Dolly went to put the kit out.
SPEAKER_01Me and Farmbra in the conference. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Dolly Fuzjuk. Yeah, Dolly. Ah, Dolly's all it. Yeah, Dolly Fujik.
SPEAKER_01So for anyone listening, Kit Men goes.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, so we do a dummy run, which will come on to next. So we go go and put the kit out in the morning before the pre-match. So we'd like a bit of a dummy run. So you know, if you're not used to the area, get the timings right. Because like Simo was always meticulate with timings. If you wanted to be there, you had to work it out and it had to be right. So we always did a dummy run. Me and Dolly would go and put the kit out and everything like that. And we pulled up a farmborough, and uh we ran this contact because like non-league wasn't anything like it was like when we're in the league, so it was all a learning curve to us. So we ran this guy to let us in to put the kit out. And uh we're expecting him to come with like a bunch of keys, and he just pulled out a fucking bakita and like unscrewed the door, took all the screws on the door, and like swung it off in the radio, lads.
SPEAKER_01And like me and Dolly's a look at each other like it sounded like my back when that kid thing around.
SPEAKER_00So yeah, so yeah, playoff there, and then obviously the playoff final. Uh once again, we're at Crew All. We're at Crew All. Um pre-match, and then obviously we were getting a police escort. And I'd done a few police escorts before, and like normally they're like hotel to dressing room door. Bretann, yeah. Hotel to dressing room door. So I'll like I've worked it out for Simon that we like need to be there this time. And I'm driving up the Jewel Carriageway, because the ground's on the other side, and it's just like cured, cured death. And I've got up there and I'm like, thank God we've got to like a place escort. So motorbikes in front of us, cop is like waving us like. So we get to the back of the queue, and the cop has gone like that, pointed us to the back of the queue. And I went, no, no, I've got the team, and I'm pointing at I'm pointing at the thing like that, I've got the team, and he went, like that, wait in there, like, get in there. And I'm and I'm gone, we're gonna be late. Like, and I'm looking at Simon in the mirror and I'm going, fuck it. So I went down the outside, screamed down the outside of the uh of the queue, cut in at the bottom, like nearly took all the Marshalls out, and you know, you know, I went and got in. So I've got off the bus and I've took a driver with us, another driver with us, because obviously I knew we were gonna win and I was gonna have a drink on the way about it. So we've got we've we've got Morris with us. Um we knew him as Reg, regular driver, good cracker Regger. And uh seen him yesterday in Little, actually in uh Wickton. So I've flew in to get all the kit and everything ready like that, and then like left Morris with the coach. So there's like a knock on the dressing room door and then the Reggie. You better come out here. The couple wants to say you. I said, I can't. He says, he's not going till you come out. He says, I told him you were the kit, man, and he didn't believe this. So I've gone out and got an absolute boss snuff. It's like more bike copies. I said, But I'll tell you to join the back of the queue things joined the back of the queue. It's just a good job you're doing what you're doing. He said, Oh, we'd be having a longer chat.
SPEAKER_01Like, we'd put you on the neck, yeah. It helped us, you know. We just got there and we just had to get our boots on. Best way. So instead of like going outside and throwing the park, like we just waiting, got out.
SPEAKER_00So yeah, it was like bizarre. Like, what was the point of the police escort? Just like get us ahead and put us in the queue. It was just like ridiculous.
SPEAKER_01Speaking of you and Dolly, you were worried that conference season, weren't you? Because if we didn't get out that time, you could you knew the club was gonna like chain us.
SPEAKER_00It was a m yeah, it was massive, wasn't it? I mean, obviously it was flying and then we we we started after Christmas and then Yeah. We could only only in at one yeah, that yeah. Went up for hard went up for hardware. Elsewhere though. Yeah. But yeah. A couple of times, well, no, I only I only ever got I only ever went the wrong way. So going back to what we're saying before about like doing a dummy run, um, looting. Uh I knew I took the wrong turning. And there's one person he he could actually spot if I'd done something wrong if he was asleep, was Arnie. Paul Arneson. Paul Arnison. Always on my kids, top blow. Absolutely hammered me all the time. My teeth aren't the best, you know. I mean, and he they used to get the black midget gems out of the midget gems, and they're like, leave them on my kit. We used to like hide them underneath my kitten like that, and I'll never mind. So I'm watching the looting ground disappear on my right hand side, and and I'm going, the ground's over there, busy. And then it's getting further away. And he just like hammered me. If ever I got into like a kit like a traffic jam, and like traffic finder, just always on the curse, but what a blow. I thought nearly got us all filled in at Millwall, though, didn't it? It was sobered millwall, like Millwall, and there's like proper gadgets there. Right next to the bench, and like, and he's warming up and he's like winding them up, and he's like pulling faces up and it wouldn't. And he people wanted to like wick his head off, and they're like banging the side of the like banging the side of the the the they'll go, oh my god, what what a man, but top block. I mean, obviously he he lives over in Australia now, but uh it's hard to keep up with people in Australia because they're asleep in your eye. Well, I know.
SPEAKER_01Tell us a couple of Roddy ones.
SPEAKER_00Allenby Ice Creams. Allenby ice creams. Allenby ice creams, yeah. So we came into training one day and we had a 16-seater minibus there parked around the back. Um so he came in and he says, uh, bring the minibus round the front. He says, We're going for a walk on Allenby Beach. And he says, uh, go and get 50 quid off shuttle and we're gonna have some creams from ice creams from 20 minutes. And I went, money was a bit like tight then. I thought Chelsea's not gonna be happy about this. So I've gone in, I said, uh Roddy wants 50 quid. What for ice creams? I'll sort this out. I've stormed out and she came back, give us a 50 quid. So we've gone to Allen there, by ice beans, and that, and then it's not there now, but there used to be a BP, a BP garage on the right hand side, come down Wickton Road. So one of the lads said, How much money you got left, but said I said, Pull in here, get 16 Cornetos. So I've pulled in the garage and I've gone into the shop and I was like, not enough cornetos in there. And I thought, that's the woman, I said, Have you got any more cornettos in the back? She says, Yeah, I think I have her. She's how many one? And I said, 16. So she comes out with this box of like 16 Cornetos, paid for them, turned, bus was gone. Fucking minibus's gone, lads have gone, anybody there, just left us. The woman behind the counter says, She says, I think you've been a bit of a joke, I think, being played on you. I said, Yeah, I think there has, yeah. So I had to ring Sue to come pick us up. So I've Sue come and pick us up, and she drops off of the ground now. Few and I've gone, like, oh I'm sorry, gone. So the lads, yeah. But you see, you want so the lads are doing Pilates around the back. So I've gone in the changing room and I like, you know, the two big the big blue skips. I've cleared the dressing room, every bit of thing that's in there, shoes, everything, all the clothes, everything, everything. I've just I've just scripped it, put them in the blue skips, and I've run across to the e-stand with the skips. Ted's damn mental. Get off that fucking page. So I've gone and I've hid them in the east stand, and I've gone and locked myself in the dress in the in my kit room. So so with the sex thing on the house. So I could either the wing gum. I could hear them, I could hear the studs coming around the corner and when it's gonna go out. Well, you're regretting it at this point. I think I wasn't in the grass. I might have overdone it a little bit. So they've come in, and the first person has walked in the like dressing room and they've just gone. And I could hear it, and I could hear them running around trying to find us and that, and then someone one of them says, He must be in here, he must be in here, and they're like they're trying the door, and then next minute the door comes through. So they've come through, got us, stripped us, and then threw us in the middle of the sprinklers. So I I never ever won aerial. It's crawling. I always just like never won.
SPEAKER_01Do you want to tell them about when you made us for into um greyhound ownership?
SPEAKER_00Never got an idea. Nothing ever went right. So we bought this greyhound and then Who meet you? Good idea. It never comes good from that setup. Uh there was a there was a few. We had a few. And they kept saying when's he gonna win? When's he gonna win? I said that we'll just gotta let the trainer do his job, you know what I mean? He'll tell us when he wins. So anyways, comes in to work this day, comes in the club this day. And uh I said, right, lads, tonight's tonight. I said, Sunderland, the da da da da da. I said, trainer said it's gonna win. Have what you won on it. So I had a one then as well, and there was still Greyhound Race and a Gretna, and I fancied mine as well. So I thought, what I'll do is I'll take mine up to Gretna and then uh I'll record it. And I knocked my phone off and I'll record it when I get home and I'll watch it. So I went to Gretna and mine got beat, so I curiosity got the better of this, so I'm like knocked my phone off the 74. I was all these voice messages, you fat bastard fucking clown. I thought, what's going on either? You know what I mean? So I've like flew home and like flew in, forgot about the dog in the car, they left him. I like put the put the put the recording on, and I'm watching the watching the dog, and the hair comes around the traps, and like we're in trap four, and I'm looking, and they come out, traps open, and I'm like looking the first bend, and I went, Where's the fucking forge? It's it's not there. So the so the dogs have gone round, and I and I've had to like rewind it because I was actually then watching the four, and the four doesn't come out. So as you play the race round, because the traps lift up and then they swing into the middle of the ground. So as they're coming round back past the traps, our dog's still in the trap and the fucking fucking tails wagging if we tails just wagging like that. Something setting tickless, Tommy. So then we got another one, and then there were lads without training, it was having its first trial, and it it it got to the hair and it had a heart attack that die. So we we give up after that. Good idea. Tell me that John Toshak John God rest his peace, lovely book. Um has he died? No, he's got dementia, hasn't he? No, no. John Toshak has he died his name's gone out of me now, chairman at the time. Oh, Mr. Jenkins. No, oh come on, boss said that John Courtney. John Courtney, John Courtney, so obviously he was Umbro franchisee, great blog. Um always very generous and that. So he was umbrough franchisee for Ireland, so he was involved with that, like I don't know why, but he was. Um he was involved with the with the selection of John Toshack. So he came in there, came into the club and he goes, John Toshak, get what you want on him, lads. He's agreed to do the island manager's job. Got a couple of days till it goes legal, uh he goes live. He says, So get what you want on top. YT's in dressing room, straight up worry cut. Right, so me and Billy Barr. Billy Barr, what a job he's oh working by the little bill. I shoved a bit for him. So me and Billy Barr, we've opened this Beckfair account, and we've just like we just like tit, we're just betting him all the time, John Toshaka, and every time that muddy kept the button, like we had this big green column, and like I'm telling Sue everything. Like, I'm Benny Dawn. A couple of days, I said, we'll be going like that. So Sue's like, not mentioning a whole game, Mickey there, or she had this, she had this John Toshaka that says, It's gonna be announced anytime soon. Anytime soon it's gonna be announced, don't worry about it. So I'm in the shower one night, and then oh. I heard a like a screen. She screamed them downstairs, going, You fucking idiot. And I said, What have I done now? She's come down, she says, Hey, watch this. John Toshek had like took a job in Italy. He'd gone back and talked to his wife, and his wife wasn't for having the other island. So we've lost all our bets. So fair play to John. We've come in the dressing room and he goes, Uh, go down to the dressing room, get all the betting slips off the white tees. He says, I'll reimburse them. Oh, fair play. So I went down and got all the betting slips off him. And I said, I've got all the betting slips, John. Do you want ours? He says, Do I fight white tees just a turn on that? So we got this because we just opened the account. We got this Bet Fair Diary sent to us. And I said, Are you Billy who've got a Bet Fair Diary? He said, Don't talk to me about that. He said, It's the most expensive diary I've never bought in your fucking life.
SPEAKER_01Torture. It's class when you get one of them, won't we? Oh, good. Uh remember Scott Doby. Yeah. Class loud door. He can be an angry man though.
SPEAKER_00Can he? Especially when you take him off on a hat trick. So I'd got, you know, it was another one. Like, I'd was given the like role of handing the cards because you did. Got it wrong, didn't I? Scott was on a hat trick at home. Can't know what to do against. He was absolutely flying. Simon wanted to make up his sober and like I give I give fourth official his card, didn't think anything about it. And then the fucking board went up and I heard a load of booing and I went, Oh god, fuck's a took him off? I took Scott Dobby off on that trick, and it won't it was supposed to come off. I can't remember. So Scott's soon on the centre circle and he's going. But the flat's done it, you can't. The board was off like that. So he's walking off and he's looking right at Simmo, and Simmo's pointing at me. Says foot. Oh, amusing.
SPEAKER_01Who was the best manager you worked for?
SPEAKER_00Off Simmons all day long.
SPEAKER_01Is it Simmo? Why? You give you bolligans, though.
SPEAKER_00Oh yeah, but that's why you you knew where you stood with him, you knew when you'd done something wrong, you knew you were, you know, but absolute top bloke. Obviously, local lad, did wonders for the club. Uh a lot of respect for him. Um yeah, sim Timmo all day long.
SPEAKER_01It was uh, how did you find MacDonald? Neil McDonald.
SPEAKER_00How did you find him?
SPEAKER_01It's gonna take a while.
SPEAKER_00I won.
SPEAKER_01I won.
SPEAKER_00Sunline striker, wasn't it? I won. I don't know how to came charging down good to go and see him, didn't you? Well, I'd played 46 games every season if I was left in the court. I had a right to talk to him. I met I met him in the Did you have it out of him? No. No, he stopped him, didn't he, remember? Or did he just we met we met in the corridor and I went, where are you going? He said, I'm gonna see him. And I says, No, I said, just leave it. He says, the only way I'm not gonna see him if he's got the sack. And I went.
SPEAKER_01And this is like, there's no way in the world he was getting the sack, was it? Because one game one game in, wasn't it? Just had to sign a new deal. I was like, and he went, I went, so he turned round and then I went down to the dressing room and the lads were like save your clear there by one game. One game. Well, you could what could you? I maybe well he met her. Uh before he left, didn't it? I went, Do you know what? Yeah. I was on a few quid off the club as well, though.
SPEAKER_00So yeah.
SPEAKER_01I put um we're saying earlier, do you know the kit man that now? On like seven grand a week now. Huh? You won the bonus one, yeah, weren't you?
SPEAKER_00Uh no, I would never run the bonus, no. Obviously, my bonus was you. Lads used to end of the season used to chip in on it. Like, which is good. Yeah, yeah. So it would like, yeah, that was that was that was great.
SPEAKER_01I think that's cla like do clubs have been a big start of the season, it's almost like the players stand up, yeah, like extended kind of staff. Do you know what I mean? Like your cleaners and your kitmen and bus drivers that they were all part of it, and they're all working family. Yeah, and it was it was it Julie Rotherham? Yeah, and I'm Nick I'm known as Ginger Pan. I don't know. Ginger pan face to me. Uh I used to go in every morning and go, All right, ladies, you're miserable. And they're like, I'm pan face. And John Ward came in one day and just went, I don't like the banter between years. I was like, What? Uh that's John Ward had your number though, didn't he? You weren't messing changed.
SPEAKER_00Aye, I know you you kind of knew which managers you could have banter with, and you like you knew like John lovely bloke, but like you just knew you just knew how far you could go with certain managers.
SPEAKER_01John Ward, as you say, a lovely bloke, loved, looked like a school teacher, loved his jewelry, loved his jewelry, and we used to start flying everywhere, didn't we? Take it all in your behaviors like that. In the end, the lads, you know, like we're like, fucking hell, yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we we chartered a couple of planes, didn't we, for a couple of years? I did, I Carlisle charts. So I got Eastern Airways in and then they landed at Carlisle Airport before it had been developed. And uh I didn't know this at the time, so we flew down to Exeter. Mad, you know. We're playing Exeter and we're still in Carlisle at one o'clock for a three o'clock kickoff. You just flying in for the game, were you? Flying down for the game. So we we we did we departed at 12 o'clock. What league was? League two. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, league two. So we're playing Exeter, three o'clock kickoff. We're still in Carlisle Airport at 12 o'clock. Took off just after 12 o'clock, landed at one o'clock. I had a coach booked at the other end to take us to the ground. Coach picked us up at one o'clock, went and played the game. I think we drew one one. Uh we're back in Carlisle for 7 o'clock. Martin House exited away. I told to do it. That's the way they do it. They're the better ones than like say playing Derby where you've got to drive this room. So John says, Right, we're doing it for Cambridge away. So I rang Easton Airways up and I says, Uh, can we book it for the no pilots won't land at Carlisle Airport. And I said, Why? He says, Well, that last he says, uh we could hardly land for the potholes. So they wouldn't come back to Carlisle. We have to do it, but we we we flew out of Newcastle and it just took that bit too much. Took that out of it, took that other hour to get there. Yeah, obviously we we drove airside and got straight on, but it just took that that hour.
SPEAKER_01Do you think now um Eddie Howe, Tyndall, and that do what you, Dennis Booth, and Dolly done on Friday night at away games, which was what just sat there were tight and Dennis and Dolly used to have cans and he used to go up his room to get his vodka to go button and then come back to you? So they're all sitting in the bar, all of them were drinks, but none appeared at the bar.
SPEAKER_00So just bring your own bottle. I drove I drove Burnley for it for a year when Eddie Owen, Jason Tyndall were there. And do you know something very similar to Carlisle? The the the the banter was like Eddie got a bit crap right up there, yeah.
SPEAKER_01But the you know who did you have in the Burnley team? Catson.
SPEAKER_00Kieran Tripier. Um four years of me now. My memory's when you get older, your memory goes, but they were on there were flying, weren't they? They were flying, yeah. They're like if they would so what league was that in then? Strip the Prem? Well, was it the Premier? Mark Class, right? Yeah, it seemed like good guys though. Like to what follows we used to have a quiz the night before the game, and nobody wanted me because I was absolutely clueless with football. And like, for his interest to say, I uh not I'm not having bushead this week, but I think in the in the one season, like I don't know where it came from, but a question came up and I went, Ronnie Rosenthal. And they were all right, looked at me and then where's that come from? And I've no idea where it came from, but I think I've got about one right.
SPEAKER_01Are you saying you had to um you had to do an initiation song, didn't you? A dollar. I need a dollar. I need a dollar, yeah. What was yours? I'll predict the diet.
SPEAKER_00So yeah, I got in trouble at Burnley because when they're in the Prem, uh obviously it was big, everything like that. All dressing room was done out, and uh, I'm sitting in the dressing room with the kit man Lee. I thought, took a picture, and I took a picture like that and then put it on Twitter. And then I thought, well, X as it's known now. Five minutes later, the fucking dressing room door burst open. Who's put a fucking dressing room on social media? Decimal? No, this was Burnley. This was Burnley. Oh, yeah. I said, Burnley. No, this was just this was the the the media man for Burnley because I'd because it was bigger than the you know first game, first home game in the Prem. What was in the picture?
SPEAKER_01The strips a trip is on a team.
SPEAKER_00Who's Mark and Ruffel's take mate?
SPEAKER_02Get it.
SPEAKER_00So he burst it, get it. I said, uh I think that's me. He says, get it taken down. I was trying to like delete him. Just one of my mini book ups of it. I see.
SPEAKER_01Right. Who uh is it saying Fred Storey, chairman, John Courtney, chairman? You had a good run there, didn't you? Yeah. Andrew Mr. Jenkins, yeah, uh Simmore, Neil MacDonald, John Ward, Roddy.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Like that, isn't it? Just how many years did you do, Carl?
SPEAKER_00Nearly ten. I think I've gone to it. I'll only like best ten years of my life, memories. I'll never, ever, ever get any in any other job. Just didn't get paid very much.
SPEAKER_01Aye. But you said it was changing near the end.
SPEAKER_00Like, it was changing, definitely was getting professional. Very professional, like a professional football club or something. I think they get me out of there. So yeah, and yeah, you could just tell things were changing a little bit, it's just uh things were getting a little bit more serious, and a couple of the lads left, and like just the banter went, you know, and like just the banter. It kind of went like quite quickly. Um and then I thought, yeah.
SPEAKER_01It only takes probably a couple of characters a couple now in one dressing room for the whole place to kind of go die a little bit. I mean, it keeps as we said, a few of the names that keep the banter going. You keep now that and then everybody else knows that that this is the norm. Do you know what I mean? Like we have a bit of banter and yeah, over like two years, Kev Grey. Now they've now they're all dancing. Just like I said, you hear what I do on uh what was it? The Forest Green Boy got my clown watch for this week, but forest green boys they got beat, and then the next day they're gonna be. They got beat on a Saturday and Monday on TikTok. The two of them are putting dances on, like dancing in the changing room on a Monday. Is that us being no school? Nah. I don't think anyone we like drive as a player in a dressing room would like think that acceptable. Yeah, do you know what I mean?
SPEAKER_00You couldn't get away and now we were like if I ever got anything wrong, like or I'd ordered the wrong pizza or something, like that, I'd just turn around and say, Hey, don't be having a go with me, I'll just watch you give a fucking ball away for 90 minutes. Like critical could come back.
SPEAKER_01You just couldn't I couldn't say that never lad. But do you think like you had to have that personality and like banter to kind of for the boys to respect you? I'd have been quiet, kit man, Ed Barnsley, yeah, yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. See the fact that you were like give them a bit back and stuff like that, it almost like the love they gave you that respect of being like Absolutely, yeah. Or there's a walk over the top of it too friendly.
SPEAKER_00No, absolutely. I I think it was both ways. I I could give it and and and and I could take it. I took it more than I gave. Finally, but yeah, just like so many.
SPEAKER_01Evan Howard's great lads.
SPEAKER_00Evan Howard came to work in a pickup, he was doing a house out. So while they were training, we got every fucking bin we could find in the ground and just like loaded his pickup up. He'd come around for training, and it's just like wheelie bins and bins in the back of his pickup, and we'd like strap them on like that.
SPEAKER_01Remember his car, his BM kept falling to bits, and he came in, he went, huh? Come the I know what happened. I went, What? He went, it's not a BM, it's half of it's a BM, half it's another car, molded in. What you laugh? Oh, you'll come shut up. Uh Evan needed one more appearance, the playoff final for 50 grand. No. And then we got beat last minute in off house and for 50 grand. That's what's hard to take. I got to learn it.
SPEAKER_00So then there was Danny. Danny and the lads run out of petrol in the M6. Danny Graham. No, Danny, Livsey. Livesy. Yeah, the Manchester lads. And they knew Magno was behind him, Magnolia. So they rang me up and said, Boss said, ring Magno and tell them to bring us some petrol. So I rang Magno and says, Magno, I says, Danny and Danny and them's like run out of petrol and I says, Can you stop at the services and get them some petrol and and like take it to them? So he'd done that. Betty of mine knowing them sick, by the way. Turned up with a fucking litre bottle of petrol. Avian. One reason. Getting 20 hours down the road.
SPEAKER_01I'll get you up to that. See that we fun box up there? No. Yeah. Any more? Any more? Do you remember any more? Could sit here for hours. You could. I know you could. Tales of a kit, man. We'll have to do a part two. Brilliant, man. It was a pleasure. It was a chore and all, to be fair, working with you, but yeah. We got there in the end with uh can't do can't sniff at two promotions. Should have been three. No. Couple of cup finals. Doesn't happen very often, does it? Hey, he said you drove the bus for Barrow today, cup final, and you're meant to sit somewhere else. You say no, and you're on the bag up there. Full beat 84 bad board to himself.
SPEAKER_00That was a free bar that night, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Was I? Free bar. I won it. What was the most devastating game? You remember Leeds won, no? Yeah. Leeds won, no. Trophy Leeds was uh you know what? Probably before Leeds we shouldn't have been in the placks. We should have been up. Uh that's right, Mrs. When we lost like Millwall away.
SPEAKER_00That was Leeds as well, wasn't it though? When we we we we were like 45 minutes off promotion, weren't we? Yeah, we won in a luck. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, we're that close. Merf stood on the ball. Yeah. I remember I remember saying at half time, he went 45 minutes boss ahead. Never work. And he fucking blew it.
SPEAKER_01Hey, you remember at the conference, right? He was getting shit off to him. This little this little down patch. And he came in, he went, can I have a word? What the fuck does he want a word for? Like, I haven't got my wallet honest. He said, I went, man, love me. Like, he went, what? He went, get the lads going. I'll produce. It's fucking like the Morgan, yeah. Seven goals and eleven games later. That'd be pep talk, isn't it? But he you know what he'd done the best thing for me, and this changed my career. I bunged him with not a few crew out. I got the knockoff gear, didn't I? And I gave him loads, and I just said, get a room on my own when I run away. A hotel room on my own at night time. And for four years, call I had a room on my own. It's perfect. Class. No snorers, no thingy.
SPEAKER_00I was telling you the other day when You're talking about going through a low patch. I remember Danny Graham was going to he came when he was with us, he was going through a barren patch, couldn't it have Barn Dor with a banjo? And uh I said to him before the game, I said, You're gonna score today. And he goes, If I score, he says, I'm coming straight for you. Sure enough, scored in the Warwick Road end. And he spun as soon as you put it in the back of the net, he spun, came straight for us. But the manager thought he was coming to him. Oh no, you're a bastard. See, I managed to stand there with his arm, pushed him out of the road and like jumped on me.
SPEAKER_02That's class.
SPEAKER_01The last one, the last one. Remember when the kit wasn't released and you hadn't released it to anyone? And I took you over at a mine on a bank holiday Monday. That's a geezer walking down the street and kill them off.
SPEAKER_00Decked out. Decked out now, we're kidding, and it didn't be released. Unbelievable.
SPEAKER_01Right, cheers to that bushead. Thank you. Tales from a kit man. We've just got to finish off. Housekeeping, please, please um subscribe to YouTube. Might get us a few quid. Um and also we've got some prizes to give away soon, but you need to be on that. And I've just got one more little letter to do you. Hello all. Hope you're well. First off, I would like to say how much I'm enjoying the podcast, how it flows nicely from talking about Carl United, the results that Mark talks about and his team has played. We're gonna do this this week. And Dylan talking about his playing career that we could not could not hear about. I'm especially enjoying the clown bit. I knew you would mention about the Chelsea Huddle, was laughing at that myself and saying that will be on the podcast. It's a breath of fresh air. My name is Claire Burgess. I was work, I was wondering if it was possible to advertise us, please. And we are looking for players that are over 16 years old who have the chance to play in the County Ability League in the Cumberland FAA from April to October. The players can have the following to qualify: mental health, autism, ADHD, learning disabilities, and physical impairment. So it's a league for them. Um April to October. So you're getting the nice months, aren't you? Yeah, yeah. Um we have qualified coaches with DBS and are FA qualified. I'm just asking around in case you could advertise us. If you can't, it's no worries, but many thanks for taking the time, reading the email. Many thanks, Claire. So, as we've said, over 16-year-olds they have the chance to play in the County Ability League, the Cumberland FA hold every season. Players to qualify mental health, autism, ADHD, learning disabilities, and physical impairment. So we'll give that a plug again next week. Absolutely, yeah. Yeah, get yourself down, innit? And fantastic. And to finish off, just another thanks for our Kingmore Park neighbours, Flexi Rental, Director Michael Seggi. Thank you very, very much for that. Uh so Flexi Rental is a Cumbria-based vehicle leasing partner built with SMEs and growing businesses in mind. So they're very big on supporting communities, backing local clubs and charities. And as I said before, because a strong local business and strong communities go hand in hand, both said. Do you agree? I agree. Good. So thank you to Michael and Daly for the sport. Flexi Rental. Get onto them, get on their what their sorry, Instagram. Remember again, subscribe to our YouTube channel. I hope you've enjoyed it. I hope you've heard and enjoyed tales from a kit man. Um, there's plenty more to come, isn't it? Just getting into your flow there. One more thing. Yes. You didn't ask, we won at the weekend one-nil. Excellent. So skip when we lose, which is not losers. We passed by it. No, good win. 1-0. 1-0 against Crook at home. Um score. Well. Elvin James header. And they got a penalty in the 90th minute. Thomas Randall on loan from Carly Knight. Saved it. Excellent. And he's a really good kid, and he was my favourite person on Saturday night. Very good. Well but now we never had the game, so weekend off for me. Weekend off? Nothing through, but I won't tell you about my weekend, but I went to Braintree. I didn't get back till 10 o'clock last night. That's all we need to see, but that'll be dealt with this afternoon. Right. Thank you very much. Thank you.