Ep. 75 - The Slack Doctors Episode 75 Just Us Docs

The Docs fly solo today as technical issues deprive us of Dean-o. Dr. Bob's shares a short rant about Publix deli procedures. The Docs discuss J.D. Vance's recent appearance on Joe Rogan's podcast, Jordan Peterson's rather odd fanbase, and Candace Owens wrecking marriages on X. Dr. Chip is not a fan of air shows. Has the US wasted its military on the wrong approach? Why advertise an airport? We watch a snarky game warden who really likes his work. Contender for asshole of the year wants those kids off his lawn (and in jail!).Some trouble at the dispensary and the salon (same lady?). The duo that would maybe have been great, Varney and Williams. Dr. Chip proposes a game that will have no winners (we apologize to everyone for this). Both Docs read tweets from Japanese visitors to America. Watch the most unhinged car salesman in history, did this ever air on real tv? 

Transcript

SPEAKER_16 0:17

All right, ladies and gentlemen, as we speak, J. D. Vance is an anti-Semite for going to enact the policies of our president and try to bring peace to the Middle East, as well as Roger Waters is right now discussing 9-11 with Tucker Carlson.

SPEAKER_17 0:40

Roger Waters of Pink Floyd or some political opponent that I have no idea who he is.

SPEAKER_16 0:45

No, no, the Roger Waters. But anyway, yeah, yeah, we're we're sans uh uh uh producer Dino, obviously, today, but I still am Professor Chip or Dr.

SPEAKER_17 0:54

Chip and uh I'm still Dr. Bob. And I suspect that uh our producer's issue is gonna be is somehow Wi-Fi related. I think he's had it.

SPEAKER_16 1:02

And he could pop back in at any minute. Yep, yep. He could be here any moment. So we're gonna go ahead and go without him for a little while and see how it goes. What was what was your week like or a couple of days anyway?

SPEAKER_17 1:13

I was gonna say we we did a show two days ago, so there really hasn't been that much. But you know something I was I I actually noticed while I was waiting to join the meeting today, and I wanted to say this while Dean was with us, but I'm sure he'll get a chance to re respond to it later. You know how sometimes you hear a word too many times and it starts to just become like a nonsense sound, starts to lose its meaning. Uh the invite to join this thing is uh the word studio is in it so many times that by the time you get done saying it out loud, Growth Professor Studios invited you to join as a guest on their Growth Professor Studios Studio Online Recording Studio. I've never read it out loud. I never would have never never read it. It's just the word studio is in there far too many times. It's very odd. Again, not a whole lot has actually occurred in my life in the last two days. Um I did have a you know another senior moment, Karen moment, lash out for no reason moment, and not really lash out, but just bitching about things. So I went to Publix the other day, yesterday, I think, to uh get a sub. And they had some, you know, new limited time only, whatever. And they do that frequently. It's always boars head, and this was like a summer club, and it looked good. The sandwich looked pretty good. So I tell she goes, What can I get you? I said, I'll take the summer club on a soft sub roll. And she immediately goes, Do you want mayonnaise on it? I'm like, No, I'll have it exactly the way it's it's written. That description, that's perfect. Everything on there is perfect. She goes, Oh, I don't know what's in it. And it's every single time that they have any kind of specialty item like that, they don't train their staff at all about what's in it. You just have to read the description to them.

SPEAKER_16 2:54

They don't even care what's in it.

SPEAKER_17 2:56

Yeah, but they can't see it because it's facing out and it's it's like they literally apparently don't even have to like come out and look at it.

SPEAKER_16 3:02

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_17 3:03

Apparently they don't even have another copy of that like printed in front of them that they could reference, which would maybe be a good idea.

SPEAKER_16 3:09

You know, special of the day, recipes or whatever. Exactly.

SPEAKER_17 3:13

So it made me think of all the years that I spent in restaurants, both front and back of the house, managing and waiting tables and bartending and everything. And staff had to know what was in us, you know, in a dish. If somebody asked you, hey, what's in that? You didn't have to be the cook to know what was in it. You would describe it. And this is the person who's actually going to make the sandwich. And she has no idea what's in it. So, you know, I had to bid to the manager on my way out. And they're going to do anything about it, but you know, whatever. Made me feel better to make my opinion known. At least you get to watch her make the sandwich. That's true. That is true. And technically, you you could kind of ruin them for the rest of the society by just telling him a whole list of shit that's not in the description and convincing them that's what the sandwich is. The next guy that comes up that's like, yeah, I want to do the summer club, and then they would just start making it completely wrong. I should have done that just to sew more chaos and thought it didn't occur to me till just now.

SPEAKER_16 4:11

Yeah, I don't think I'm not sure. I I I think I've left the house twice since our last podcast, once to go to the grocery store. And then today I had I went out as you know, as I told you before, we started for a failed, failed mission to get a pop, a pop screen and uh and an extension to uh yeah, that's why I'm using this mic today instead of the other one. I think you should just buy one of these. It came with a pop screen. No, no, no. I think what I'm gonna do, I'm pretty sure what I'm gonna do now, maybe not by next episode, but pretty soon, is just set up a table in it out of the room and set up a studio in there. I'm gonna go get a camera. I'll get either a digital mixer or something so I can actually use a real mic instead of these digital crap pieces of garbage.

SPEAKER_17 4:53

Anyway, but you know, whatever. I did have a Go ahead. I I did have a couple of other errands that I ran that day. You said you only left the house just to go to the grocery store. I I hit the grocery store and I had to go to the dispensary, but I also had to and I told you this on the phone earlier, went by to get gas, and I realized the first time I've gotten gas in my car since I was down there last. Yeah, right. I can't remember what that date was, but I feel like it's close to like a month. Um everything around me is so conveniently located, and I don't really go anywhere or do anything, so yeah. And yet both times I left the house, I had to get gas.

SPEAKER_16 5:27

No, I'm just kidding. The Jeep's bad. It's not that bad, but it's pretty bad on gas.

SPEAKER_17 5:33

Oh, but anyway, it's so bad on it's so bad on gas you can't take it to full service because you might accidentally rev the engine and suck the attendant right into the tank. Like a like a fighter jet. Uh but yeah, as well. Oh, very nice. Very nice. Much, much better than the lolly that we're uh that we apparently in editing got highly dramatized is popping the can into the screen there. But this has way less sugar, much better.

SPEAKER_16 5:58

Well, as I uh mentioned in the intro, it's a wild time to be alive, folks. It's uh, you know, they are all over JD Vance for what he said on Joe Rogan. He either he either went on Joe Rogan and either lost the presidency in 28 or won it, depending on who you talk to. It's it's it's crazy. It's insane.

SPEAKER_17 6:22

And of course, yeah, I couldn't get through the episode. I got so tired of just listening to him talk about arm bars and fighting in the beginning.

SPEAKER_16 6:31

Yeah. I can't wait to have you know, here's the thing that occurred to me today. You know what JD Vance really is? I mean, if you're a student of history at all, J.D. Vance is Jimmy Carter 2.0. He's he's Jimmy Carter.

SPEAKER_17 6:45

You know, one thing southern dude. One thing he is pretty adept at is like water off a duck's ass when it comes to you know people mocking him or making fun of him. The way he leaned into the memes about him, where you know, where he's all chubby and like dancing and stuff, and exaggerated face, when South Park made fun of him. No, he didn't get mad about any of it. He didn't he he did it exactly the way you're supposed to. He laughed at it, took it as, you know, whether he actually does take it as a compliment or not, at least he's savvy enough to say that, as opposed to celebrities and politicians that get completely bent out of shape as soon as they're satirized and start crying and bitching about it. He's definitely gone about that the right way. J.D.

SPEAKER_16 7:29

Vance is the model politician exactly as he's groomed to be. He's gonna be he's gonna be Peter Thiel's perfect little puppet. I mean, you know, if if he beats Rubio, who's the other guy they're talking about, whoever if they be uh, you know, whatever, who cares?

SPEAKER_17 7:43

Well, Rubio is busy, he's just gonna move to Venezuela and be their president. Just a much easier gig. It's a smaller country to manage, plenty of money to be made. Why why come back here? Now, I I don't imagine you watched uh Trump's speech last night, did you?

SPEAKER_16 7:58

Uh no, I watched like the first five minutes of it today on YouTube. But from what I hear was a lot about election interference. And have you heard what I mean, Thomas Massey said this before, but you have you heard Thomas Massey's response to basically his whole uh speech? No. He goes, we own the House, we own the Senate, we own the presidency, we own the the Supreme Court. We're winning all the elections. How are they rigged? I mean, it's like, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_17 8:28

Yeah, that that does seem to make yeah.

SPEAKER_16 8:31

How are we, you know, and then the and then the funniest uh memes on uh apparently said something about I guess he implied that China was controlling us or something, just bullshit like that. So all these memes are are like on uh X of of like Kim and Carter and and Obama and Bush and all of them over over in Israel kissing the wall with the little Chinese with the Chinese hat on.

SPEAKER_17 8:54

It's hilarious. No, though I did see something recently about Massey who was being interviewed by somebody about some sort of they were calling it the Fossil Act, uh, but it was basically some like age requirement for the Senate and and the House, you know, at a certain point, maybe get some sort of cognitive testing or something. I don't know exactly what's in the bill. Oh, it's an existing act? Or no, they're it's a proposed.

SPEAKER_16 9:17

Oh, they're proposing it. Yeah, like yeah. Well, there's a 25th Amendment. I mean, whatever the fuck that is.

SPEAKER_17 9:22

I I I lose track of it of that. I think this is probably more directly related to the like the Mitch McConnell situation and stuff. Oh, I don't know. Who cares?

SPEAKER_16 9:32

Whatever. Yeah, you know, like I keep saying, like the people that keep saying, oh, we need term limits, we need term limits. No, you just need to stop electing the same freaking criminals over and over and over and over again. Pick somebody new. Stop electing the same guy. Anyway, what are you gonna do? All right. Well, first of all, uh it's a free wait. Well, I'll tell you what, maybe we'll skip the game for now and see if Dean shows back up because there are three parts to the game. We can play it with just two of us if he doesn't come back.

SPEAKER_17 9:58

But if Yeah, yeah, we should wait. You at least give him a chance. Right, right, right, for sure.

SPEAKER_16 10:02

You want to start with voicemails? I think you left like Yeah, I left a couple of voicemails, which we may have already talked about. I have no idea. I forget what I left. Okay, well, by the time this gets out on our show, it'll probably be well publicized and and uh examined over and over again. But uh guess what? Turns out the old uh lone furry Lance Tweety there is a Jordan Peterson fan. That's right. That Jordan Peterson, big fan. And discuss.

SPEAKER_17 10:35

That's a bit of a surprise. Little bit. I would not expect him to be at in the typical demographic range of your of a Jordan Peterson fan, but not exactly what you would think a furry omo tranny would be listening to, but apparently he's a big fan. Is that bird outside my house or your house? I don't hear a bird. Yeah, must be my invention. Bird, bird, bird, bird's a word. Alright, here we go.

SPEAKER_16 11:09

You know, I sent you a clip about this, but we we if we don't show up, we have to talk about Candace Owens is now breaking up blue collar families because the wives are believing her theories. It's all Candace's fault. It's hilarious. Anyway.

SPEAKER_17 11:34

No, it is. I mean, apparently the only people that are fans of Candice Owens are the people that hate her. I was just gonna say any marriage that can be uh disrupted by anything that comes out of that woman's mouth was already on pretty rocky ground. That would be my opinion. Here's the thing.

SPEAKER_16 11:48

Didn't you didn't you didn't pull up the clip I'm talking about, did you? You're not gonna play it later, are you? No. Okay. I don't think so. So here's the thing. And if you're calling the the wives of all blue-collar women stupid for believing Candace Owens, I don't know if that's gonna I think they might take offense to that. I can see how that might not work out. That's just so insane. I mean, that's such a crazy blanket statement of what? Say what now? Whatever. And then other people are now going on and saying, oh, yeah, if your wife believes Candace Owens, you should take the kids and leave. I swear to God, it's a good idea.

SPEAKER_17 12:37

Do you imagine going to court with that as your reasoning? What's that? Do you imagine going to family court with that as your ammunition? I mean, Jesus.

SPEAKER_16 12:49

And it looks at it, look, it's not even like, look, I don't believe the Charlie Kirk thing. No, it's you listen to Candace. It's like, wait a minute, how did this get shifted? I mean, literally on X, it's all about Candace Owens. She owns X. I mean, I mean, she's gotta be raking it in. Uh next. Yeah, I don't know if you guys saw the thing about the the close call uh flyover by those jets at the beach or whatever, but I gotta say, I mean, couldn't happen to a better group of liberal commie boot fickers. They got exactly what they deserved.

SPEAKER_17 13:26

We'll discuss. Yeah, I think I did see something about a fly, was it in Daytona?

SPEAKER_16 13:33

I don't know, but I got a morbid satisfaction out of it. I was like, you idiots deserve exactly what you got.

SPEAKER_17 13:40

Yeah, I don't know anything about this incident. I just know I what I think I saw uh just a few minutes before the show, even on YouTube, was something about that the pilot that did that is not being um punished for it, I guess.

SPEAKER_16 13:55

I I've heard it was a chick that was fired. I heard it's not being punished, I've heard all you know, d who cares? It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Nobody gives a shit. It wasn't a good idea. The whole fucking stupid concept is a stupid idea. Listen, why don't you take the fucking couple of hundred grand you spent flying around showing off your fucking jets and feed someone do something cure cancer, do something, quit flying around and wasting fucking money. But whatever. I digress. But you know, it's kind of hilarious that you know, these people go to the beach. See, now I hear myself like coming back. But anyway, uh you know, why would you you go to the beach to see these guys showing off with their stupid jets? And guess what? You're not you're not only not safe, they're not keeping you safe, they're putting you in danger. They're not these people, you know, when you go up and thank them for flying over me and knock and almost killing my children. I mean your service. I mean, get out of here with that bullshit.

SPEAKER_17 14:55

And fuck off. Anyway. All right. Uh okay, an addendum to that call, apparently.

SPEAKER_16 15:03

Footnote to my last call. Let's discuss how uh you know, the fact that the lobbyists and the defense contractors have basically made us the weakest country on the planet. And unfortunately, the only thing we really have left, if if anybody were to attack us, are nukes. We'd have to nuke ourselves, basically. Otherwise, anyway, we'll discuss. Do you understand my gist there, or should I explain it? Go ahead. Expand. Well, here's the thing. I mean, we spend billions on those jets to knock people over at the beach and supposedly keep us safe. Guess where we can't use those things? Iran. You know, they we have billions of billion hundreds, millions, billion dollar air three, like three, two or three aircraft carriers full of billions of dollars worth of aircrafts over by Iran. We can't use any of it. It's not working. Anytime. You know what's working? The $5,000 drones the Iranians are making.

SPEAKER_17 16:05

Yeah. Yeah. The whole concept of of warfare being based upon sheer technology is has been clearly shown to be wrong.

SPEAKER_16 16:15

No, no, technology definitely helps, but it's the it's this sheer might stuff that doesn't seem to be worth a shit. Tanks, planes, boats, those seem to be antiquated and kind of useless now that we've spent trillions on them. You know, it's like, yeah, okay. The fighters just were were were built without drones in mind, clearly. Yeah, of course. They couldn't, they can't predict the future. They don't know, you know. Well, even if they knew the future, which they probably did, they're still gonna want to get their contracts filled and make their money. Okay, well, these are obsolete, but I mean, you do realize that they they made like a couple of billion dollar, what were they called, B-2 or some some bombers that like it turns out they were no good. We spent billions on them, and they're like, Yeah, we we're not using them.

SPEAKER_17 17:00

You know, with the advancements in drones, it it it was you would almost think that the the last person that would be a fighter pilot has already been born. Like there's we shouldn't even be using humans in the vet in them anymore.

SPEAKER_16 17:12

The drones are better. Yeah, are not only been born, probably already flying right now, truthfully. Yeah, I uh yeah. Yeah, I don't I don't think. I I think the days of man flight and manned manned anything.

SPEAKER_17 17:25

The biggest limitation with with aviation uh pretty much in the last 20 years and or more is is the the G forces on the meat inside the thing. You know what I mean? If you take the human out of the equation, then it's just metal fatigue and you know that that sort of thing. You can make a much more robust absolutely. All right, we got one more voicemail.

SPEAKER_16 17:48

Okay, I'm not sure if we've reached peak insanity yet, but we're getting close. I'm in my Jeep. Just heard an ad on the radio for Donald J. Trump Airport. Why why would they advertise an airport? You don't go to an airport because it's its advertisement, you go because it's the best place you can get to flight, right? I mean, I I I was gonna fly out of Lauderdale because I live right next door to the airport, but now I should cancel and reschedule for West Palm, I guess, or something. It doesn't make any sense.

SPEAKER_17 18:20

Uh yeah. Uh well, he already changed Southern Boulevard to Donald J. Trump Presidential Boulevard or something like that.

SPEAKER_16 18:30

And I do and even on it wasn't even an ad. It was like kind of almost a story. And they were saying, you know, well, it'll be real difficult, switching it over and all this. And I'm like, why the fuck are we doing it then?

SPEAKER_17 18:41

This is just aren't airports traditionally named after deceased presidents? Like, is there is there a precedence? You gotta get a big thing. Oh no, but I'm saying, has it ever been done before where they've named an airport after a especially a sitting, not just living, but sitting president?

SPEAKER_16 18:59

Yeah, no, I didn't. I've I don't I've you know, truthfully, I don't remember an airport ever being named what in my lifetime. But I don't know, who knows?

SPEAKER_15 19:11

That was it for voicemails. Uh you want to do clips? I got a ton of clips. Yeah, yeah, rip some clips. I got a couple of good clips too, and it's just actually a really good since Dean is in here, they're all copies.

SPEAKER_17 19:28

So we've we've we've shown a lot of clips of overzealous uh law enforcement officers.

SPEAKER_16 19:33

Oh, yeah, you got that too.

SPEAKER_17 19:34

That's we're gonna have a lot of those today. Yeah, so this one is a slight variation on that. This is an overzealous uh uh fish in wildlife. And and you know, technically what this guy is saying is probably true, but what a dick about it.

SPEAKER_10 19:53

Didn't catch much, didn't catch much. What did we catch? All right, we have any on board? Right in this cooler. So we do have fish. Okay, cool. I like it. You know what these fish are? No? You just keep them fishing.

SPEAKER_17 20:18

Is he tossing him into his boat or is he tossing them into the water? It looked like he just tossed them right back in the water, right? I mean, clearly they're they're dead. Uh look like red snappers. Food for other fish.

SPEAKER_10 20:32

Okay, get your license registration. Those are mutton snappers. Mutton snappers have to be how big?

unknown 20:37

I don't know.

SPEAKER_10 20:38

You don't know? Okay, let me get your license registration.

SPEAKER_16 20:40

I don't know either.

SPEAKER_10 20:41

Nope, they had to be 18 inches. Say it again? They're not shrinking three feet. I mean three inches.

SPEAKER_17 20:54

I have a feeling this guy knows exactly how long a three-inch shrinkage is.

SPEAKER_10 21:00

Oh, I love it! Grouper just came out of nowhere. That's amazing.

SPEAKER_17 21:06

You planted that grouper.

SPEAKER_04 21:11

I saw you pull that grouper in your hand.

SPEAKER_17 21:12

You had that grouper in your pants. Exactly. You shook your leg and the grouper slid right out.

SPEAKER_10 21:17

Nice! What is that one? Amazing! That's a grouper outside of the cooler.

SPEAKER_17 21:22

Wait, now that grouper looked like it still had some life left in it, and he literally just yoked it over to his boat. Okay. He might take it home and eat it.

SPEAKER_10 21:33

These are not your rods, these are all his rods. Okay. You have a setup of a person that would know what they're doing. You're with somebody that might know what he's doing, and it would never behoove you to ask them.

SPEAKER_17 21:46

He definitely just learned the word behoove.

SPEAKER_10 21:48

Should we keep something? Should we not keep something? So I'm gonna let you keep playing me like I'm stupid, and that's fine. You had fish there, no no no, but you have you had fish there that was undersized, and then you have a grouper. Back behind a bucket. I didn't even know that. That's fine. You threw it away in the back of your stern. That's fine. Listen, we'll go take care of everybody. You're going to have some paperwork. We'll have a conversation in a second. It behooves you to know what you're catching and what you're keeping and how big they have to be. You have a boat, you have fishing equipment, so you should know what you're doing. You're fishing with not only shrimps, but you're fishing with squid, meaning that you know what to eat, what fish eat. So again, it's okay.

SPEAKER_17 22:28

You're guilty because you know what fish eat.

SPEAKER_16 22:35

I gotta agree, the guy's probably pretty, pretty guilty, but at the same time, it's fucking fish, dude. I mean, I wish they'd get this excited about like pedophiles and people that are victims.

SPEAKER_17 22:45

Or or the you know, especially the international Chinese fishing fleets that, you know, put this guy's crimes to shame.

SPEAKER_10 22:57

Anyway, we can get a warning. Nope, there's not one way you can get in the warning.

SPEAKER_09 23:04

Do you realize that we could take your boat? We could take you to jail right now for having undersized fish. I had no idea. Okay, well, that's what we can do right now. We can take you to jail.

SPEAKER_16 23:14

So, what are you gonna do?

SPEAKER_09 23:15

Take your boat and seize your boat, also, okay? We're just gonna tell you what we could do. Now you're educated and you know, okay? You will be able to have your time in court.

SPEAKER_16 23:28

Did he say I need a lawyer?

SPEAKER_10 23:30

Can I have a lawyer? And we get to check anybody that's on the water that is fishing, doing a highly regulatory activity, aka fishing, hunting, or spear fishing.

SPEAKER_16 23:41

Yeah, I don't think they're gonna I mean, whatever they're done gonna do to him is probably a misdemeanor. I don't think a lawyer is gonna help him at all. It's just gonna be expensive. Yeah, that's just fine. Yeah. You know, here's the thing though. I don't know if this is a fact at how they do things at any police department that have uh, you know, I don't know if that's Marine Patrol or or you know, they're local police cops that come and down. That's probably Marine Patrol, truthfully, but I can tell you all it all I know is somewhere at the Academy they go, all right, let's get round up everybody that is the biggest asshole in the whole class and put them in a boat. I've never, ever ran into a cop in a boat that wasn't a complete douchebag. I mean, literally, never. They're just douchebags.

SPEAKER_17 24:30

That's bad. But anyway. Right. The better more toys you give them the the to play with and and possess, the the worse they get.

SPEAKER_16 24:36

Well, one of the problems is those uh those wildlife and commissioner guys, they have jurisdiction anywhere. They can pull you over on the turnpike from their boat. You know, it's like they can they have jurisdiction everywhere. They can do anything they want, anywhere. Doesn't matter. Land, sea, county, city, state, nothing. Anywhere. Sounds like a good gig if he can get it. Yeah. Well, before we s we get off that uh subject, I had a buddy of mine that I used to play volleyball with, and he he worked for like the I want to say the watered no, wait, what's it called? Water conservation agency or some shit like that. Water management? Yeah, water management. There you go. And his job, he would have these fish fries all the time. And his job was to go out in a boat in like a canal or a lake in a certain spot wherever they told him to go, and use what he would call his electric, uh, what did he call it? Um his electric lure or something like that. I forget what he called it. He had a sp a funky name for it. It was basically a rod you stick in the water, it shocks like about a 15-foot radius of of the water you're in, and all the fish. They all float up. Yeah, they just all come floating up, and then he goes, counts all the ones that they, you know, he take he records the data, scoops up all the ones that are edible, and then off he goes.

SPEAKER_17 25:56

It's it was great. So the way they figure out how many fish are in an area is by just killing an area, counting the dead fish, and assuming that that's basically an average for that's rough. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_16 26:07

That's how they figure it out. And I mean it you would think it'd be bad for the environment, but at the same time, it's making food for the other stuff there. Something's gonna eat all those did f dead fish. Yeah, I don't know.

SPEAKER_15 26:21

Let's see, what else have I got here?

SPEAKER_17 26:23

I got all kinds of random alright, so that was uh that was a bad cop, so now we'll do a good cop. Well, it's not much so much a good cop as it is just an asshole uh you know, private citizen.

SPEAKER_07 26:37

Do basketball over here?

SPEAKER_17 26:47

There it is. Dun dun dun. What's happening? I don't get it. This guy called the police because the kids next door are playing basketball, and the ball keeps getting in his yard, and then they come over and get the ball. And he wants them, the kids who you will find out later are the three and eleven, the ones actually coming over to get the ball. He wants them, you know, trespassed. Oh good Lord. This makes the guy that was mad about the lady in the scooter plugging her scooter in the look pretty mild.

SPEAKER_01 27:26

They might be that he's playing with him, they may not be his. That's my point.

SPEAKER_06 27:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 27:31

So if they if you're gonna say they are his and he has trespassed on my property again, which they do every single day.

SPEAKER_09 27:37

Not necessarily. I mean, very much necessary.

SPEAKER_01 27:40

We've got video.

SPEAKER_09 27:41

Do you have video of him walking and putting those there?

SPEAKER_01 27:43

No, I have video of him playing basketball when the ball is coming over here. Okay, so that's trespassing.

SPEAKER_09 27:47

So the balls are trespassing.

SPEAKER_01 27:48

If you say that's his property. So the balls are trespassing.

SPEAKER_17 27:53

Wasn't this the plot in the sand lot when the ball went over the fence and the beast was there to prevent them from getting it back? That guy's the beast.

SPEAKER_01 28:02

He sends his sibling brothers over because y'all don't give them a trespass morning like he did him. So he sends his 11-year-old brother and his three-year-old brother to retrieve the balls every day.

SPEAKER_05 28:11

Well, I'm not trespassing a three-year-old.

SPEAKER_17 28:15

Exactly. I'm not trespassing a three-year-old. The fact that I mean, you this guy should get some kind of fine for a you know false report or something, like dragging the cops out there to deal with this for a basketball that is in his Yeah. It's not like they're throwing basketballs through his windows or anything.

SPEAKER_16 28:36

It's not like I wish that was by I wish that was the charge called I mean, and so do a lot of these auditor guys that I'm gonna I'm gonna show you here. Let me show you this one of this chick, man. This is great. Let me do one. Uh it's actually I gotta do two of them in a row because it's from the same chick and it's kind of hilarious. It's some chick that lives up in Palm Bay. All right. Now let's see. This is the first one.

SPEAKER_15 29:01

Okay, so I'm not gonna play this whole thing, but we'll watch a little bit of it here. Hold on a minute.

SPEAKER_05 29:12

Wow. What I want is you being ridiculous. Somebody gonna help me. This is all transparency. I don't even know what I'm saying. Where am I? I'm not transparent.

SPEAKER_01 29:33

I'm very whoa whoa whoa whoa, man. Get off my stuff. Get off my stuff. Get off hey, hey, hey, don't touch my stuff. Do not touch my stuff.

SPEAKER_16 29:45

Okay, we can all see what's happening here. Oh, hey, hey, we got a visitor right in the middle of the podcast. Here we go. Come on in, man. Hey, we're in the middle of doing a podcast, bro. Come on in. How are you doing? My buddy Johnny D just showed up. But anyway, here's what happens with this chick. She ends up getting I mean, obviously, this goes on for an hour or something. It's Liberty. Did you try to take a troll T R O L? Yeah, yeah, this guy's pretty good. Here's the thing. They basically, this whole video is basically every one of these cops' uh uh body cameras. So here, just we'll just watch like the very first one and you get an idea, and then I gotta show you another video of this chick. But wait until you see what this chick is just so out of it. And first of all, this is at a dispensary, all right?

SPEAKER_17 30:32

Yeah, right out in front of a dispensary, yeah. And that's when she got all freaked out that you know, you're recording me coming in and out of the dispensary.

SPEAKER_16 30:39

She's acting like standing out in public. She acts like when the when she's dealing with the cops, like pot is still illegal and refuses to admit that she's there buying weed, first of all. But she's got even worse problems than that. Watch this. Hold on, wait till you see these lies these guys fucking tell here. Hold on. And we all clearly saw what just happened.

SPEAKER_13 31:01

Okay, we're seeing here the lady's not okay. Okay, he needs to be checked out.

SPEAKER_17 31:08

Security?

SPEAKER_07 31:09

I'm trying to recognize the paint pattern.

SPEAKER_02 31:14

You guys have that camera? No, I don't think it's peer leaf. Right outside the dispensary.

SPEAKER_05 31:18

Is that is that your guys's yeah, we played that this who else saw it?

SPEAKER_02 31:22

Who's all of us in here? Okay. She was leaving the dispensary just trying to go. And auditors. So she was so she was exiting. She was exiting. Like, what do you mean, stop traffic? Did he go in front of the car? He was basically phone in her passenger side. Like he was recording her. Yeah. Trying to get like actual.

SPEAKER_17 31:47

Getting in her car essentially.

SPEAKER_02 31:49

Okay. I gotcha. And you said that's their camera back there. Okay. Do you have your idea on you, sir? I would prefer to stay in on this.

unknown 31:57

That's fine.

SPEAKER_16 31:58

All right. So not only have these guys portrayed exactly what happened, completely opposite to the way it happened, but hold on, let me get this other guy back in frame here. The guy with the dark hair, even later, after yeah, that guy right there with the dark hair, even after everybody's said what's that?

SPEAKER_17 32:16

The guy with hair. You could have just said that.

SPEAKER_16 32:18

Yeah, yeah, right. Even after everything's said and done, and it's established that she was in the wrong, he was in the right, and what he's doing is completely legal. This guy says, Well, what, you know, you you should realize this is the state of Florida, and you know, he might be in, you know, I'll I'm gonna take care of business. Like he fucking threatened the guy to like to come back and shoot him. And the cops didn't even fucking blink an eye. But anyway, I digress. Let's go back to this fucking crazy chick.

SPEAKER_02 32:46

Okay, like the two.

SPEAKER_16 32:48

Here, hold on, let me get back to the stupid chick.

SPEAKER_03 32:50

You wanna take him out? No, no, she won't take him out. What's that?

SPEAKER_07 32:56

I know you just sit down in that room.

SPEAKER_16 32:59

Yeah, when I watched this the first time, I was like, and this cop's excuse for this chick's behavior is that she's just freaked the fuck out because she got maced. But I I'm telling you, from the moment this started, I was like, this chick's on.

unknown 33:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 33:14

It's right here on the corner.

SPEAKER_17 33:19

Right now she's high on spice. Yeah. She is. My buddy and I pause this for a second.

SPEAKER_03 33:27

It's easier.

SPEAKER_17 33:31

My buddy and I, when I lived in Charlotte, uh, we used to go to this Thai restaurant. And back then I could handle super duper spicy food. And we still built ourselves up to be able to order it essentially native Thai, like where the chefs would come out and look at you, you know, to see if you were really eating it. And uh we would get really, really stoned before we went there. And it's the only usually when you eat food after ingesting marijuana or smoking weed, it brings you down a little bit. Not this shit. This shit was so spicy that it actually made you more stoned. So I'm thinking a full-on face full of capsaicin pepper spray. She might be pretty lit right now. Oh yeah, yeah, she is.

SPEAKER_16 34:08

Here's here's the best part though. This is this is where she's like, she's she didn't somebody hurt me. Okay, what happened?

SPEAKER_06 34:17

Somebody shot me in the eye.

SPEAKER_03 34:21

Okay, were you talking to anybody? Were you walking on the street? What happened?

SPEAKER_06 34:25

Oh god.

SPEAKER_03 34:28

Okay. One time did you copy?

SPEAKER_16 34:35

All right, well, we don't have time, but he spends like an hour talking to this chick like this.

SPEAKER_08 34:41

Uh somebody shot me.

SPEAKER_04 34:44

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_08 34:45

My face is hurning, burning.

SPEAKER_03 34:50

So did you we have an ambulance coming right now to help you? What would you take me to do right now?

SPEAKER_08 34:55

My face isn't burning. Yep. Oh yes.

SPEAKER_03 34:58

You did you wash your face off reality?

SPEAKER_16 35:00

She just keeps saying the same thing over and over and over again. They keep telling her, don't rub your face.

SPEAKER_03 35:06

Yeah, I'm gonna get some water. You put the rag on your face, it'll help. Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 35:12

Can you help me?

SPEAKER_03 35:13

Yes, here. Look, put this on your face where it's burning, okay? It'll help.

SPEAKER_07 35:17

Oh god. Is this okay?

SPEAKER_03 35:19

Yep. Ask her what happened again. Yes, I've been pepper sprayed before. Twice. It's miserable.

SPEAKER_07 35:27

Why are they doing that?

SPEAKER_03 35:28

That's what I'm trying to find out.

SPEAKER_07 35:30

Oh god. Please help me.

SPEAKER_16 35:36

He spends he spends about, I don't know, 45 minutes uh talking to her like that. And then he has to walk outside to the other cops and go, I don't even know her name. He can't fucking get even her name out of her. She's so fucking out of it and useless. All right, so what so what happened then is I fucking I couldn't believe I found this. I saw another uh I guess I saw this video you sent me too.

SPEAKER_17 36:03

And is it really her?

SPEAKER_16 36:05

Oh yeah, it's her. It is her. And there she is going to jail.

SPEAKER_05 36:14

In jail.

SPEAKER_17 36:16

God, she's loud.

SPEAKER_05 36:18

Do not mess up my car. Okay. If you keep moving away from me, I'm gonna put you in handcuffs right now. I heard you. Okay. I should hit your ass. Wash your hands. I don't want to. Why not? I don't that's the speech.

SPEAKER_17 36:40

I never do.

SPEAKER_05 36:42

She just thinks she's the queen. Just like Donald Trump thinks he can do what the f he wants.

SPEAKER_16 36:50

Don't belong to how many gummies is she on?

SPEAKER_05 36:52

Well, she doesn't look like that.

SPEAKER_16 36:53

Dude, here's the thing. Hold on. She'll explain it to you in a minute here.

SPEAKER_05 36:56

That's a thing. Actually, that she doesn't even explain it. That's enough. That's enough. Knocked her down. I would have kicked her in the head. Yes.

SPEAKER_16 37:04

This is a lady that literally you can you could tell her all day you have the right to remain silent. It ain't gonna work.

SPEAKER_17 37:10

You don't have the ability. The title of the video says she was drunk, but I didn't necessarily think she was drunk. She was drunk. She's slurring her speech. She was just crazy.

SPEAKER_16 37:20

She admitted finally in the back of the car that she's a drunk. Oh, okay. She's drunk. And and that's gotta be what's wrong with her brain. I think her brain is pickled. I thought before, I could have swore from the first episode watching that. I thought she had like some uh I thought she had Alzheimer's or something. But she's she must have been just drunk the first time. Just like, and here's the thing about the first time, she wanted to try to drive home after being pepper sprayed, and they wouldn't let her. They're like, No, yeah, no, you're not fucking driving. You just got pepper sprayed. You can't see, you're not driving. And not suspension, I I put in the comments of the YouTube video, I was like, let her try to drive and then stop her at the driveway and hook her up, take her to jail. I mean, it's like you can't drive like that. And she wouldn't tell them where she lived, and it was it was insane.

SPEAKER_17 38:06

But apparently she was just But I mean if she was just using the dispensary, then all of that information is readily available. Now, whether that's a HIPAA violation or something that their corporate are not gonna What information? Her name and address. Oh, they got it off her plate of her car. Yeah, but I'm just saying, if she doesn't want to give ID, they could get it that way, even if she didn't know that. No, no, no.

SPEAKER_16 38:27

She not that she wouldn't. She she couldn't, they couldn't get her to say anything. And she was combative and didn't want to like I say, they were trying to like shout, like she's getting ready to leave the store, and the cops are handing her bag of gummies, going here, this is your stuff that you bought. And she's like, That's not mine. Like, you're in the weed store. Yeah, like what the fuck? They know you bought the gummies. It's it's so crazy. But yeah, she's hopefully she got the help she needs, which I I bet you she's been an alcoholic for so long. It maybe, maybe too late. But yeah. Hopefully she get because I remember watching that first video going, This lady needs help. I even said they should arrest her just to get her the fucking help she needs. But anyway, I digress.

SPEAKER_17 39:11

Anyway, I got I got a clip here that I found, and I've I've never seen these two human beings in the same room or talking to each other. And uh I the reason I'm showing this clip is I hope Dino makes a short out of it so that I can send it to my stepmother. Uh because she's a huge Robin Williams fan. And her kid, her youngest daughter, married a guy who is a huge Jim Varney fan. So here is Jim Varney. Jim Varney was the dude who played Ernest. You know Ernest movies? Ernest goes to catching catch. Right? The guy who John Cena unironically looks like now. Right.

SPEAKER_13 39:49

Yeah, you can cheat it in people. They're used to dropping them and things. That looks better for the documentary footage. Things aren't going well. That's always documentary footage. Oh, you know what's then they have this shots of like seems a crowd is moving around. That's always good for documentary footage.

SPEAKER_17 40:06

Now I don't know where they're at, why they're both seated next to each other like this, but why didn't these guys ever do a movie together?

SPEAKER_16 40:14

Oh Jim Varney says, Yeah, they're not yeah, that's casting. Casting can't let that happen.

SPEAKER_17 40:20

Yeah, well, Jim Varney, like in a couple of seconds, here you see him bantering back and forth with Robin Williams and essentially keeping up and being as goofy and weird as he is. And it's uh, you know, he got typecast into this one role, and then you know, as much cocaine as Robin. That's true. I was surprised he was able to keep up at all.

SPEAKER_12 40:40

Oh, this is what it's like back here. We're just hanging uh fishing. Y'all just crew, uh, we just rubbing elbows by Girls' stores. We're teamster replacements, we're stand-ins for teamsters.

SPEAKER_17 40:51

Anyway, I've never seen those two guys share a camera before.

SPEAKER_16 40:54

And I was I thought it was pretty entertaining. Do you think Robin Williams ever wrote comic material for a stamp or just went out there after an eight ball and said, fuck it, let's just see what comes up.

SPEAKER_17 41:05

Uh a combination of what you just said, and sadly and unfortunately, he was known to poach material from other comics uh and and even give them money for it. You know what I mean? But yeah, he was I and to be quite honest, as much as I liked most of the movies that he was in, and especially the ones where he actually played serious roles and did dramas, I was never a huge fan of his stand-up. It's a little too scatter-brained and weird. It's almost like just watching somebody exhibiting mental illness on stage. I I can't get into it, the stand-up part. Never did.

SPEAKER_16 41:39

Here's a comedy routine you're gonna get to be able to watch firsthand. As now that my buddy Johnny D is here, we can now play How Japanese Can You Sound.

SPEAKER_17 41:49

Oh no. Oh yes. Oh no. Oh yes. All right, folks. Well, it was great having the show. Uh, this is the bit that's gonna get us king.

SPEAKER_16 41:59

Hey, wait a minute. Um we're gonna we're gonna work with hold on now. We're gonna give these Japanese things every bit of respect that they deserve. All right, I'm gonna go first. I get uh what what which one did you want? You wanted Dairy Queen.

SPEAKER_17 42:14

I took Dairy Queen, yeah.

SPEAKER_16 42:16

All right, which would you rather do Comcast or Bucky's? I don't care. I thought it was Costco. I'll do Bucky's. Here's how it goes. You gotta read this in your best Japanese accent. Are we ready? This is from Nob Nubanaga. Gapan Nobunaga. In Texas, they told me to stop at Buckys for Gas. I have been to shrines, I have stood in temples that took 200 years to build. I was not prepared for the gas station. There were 120 fuel pumps. I counted them all, I did not believe them. A man beside me filling a truck the size of my first apartment. He was not willing, he was not filling it because it was empty. He was filling it because he was here. And here is where a man fills things. Inside a hall so vast, I lost the horizon. A wall of jerky, a wall of fudge. I do not know the country produced. A brisket sandwich handed to me by a man in a breaver, a beaver costume.

SPEAKER_17 43:12

Just stuck with the breaver. That was the best part so far.

SPEAKER_16 43:15

So to be clear, the breaver was not a mascot! The breva was a sight. The people of him, the way my grandmother spoke of the mountain behind her house, and the bathrooms. I have been warned about the bathrooms that I had dismissed this morning as the pride of allowed people. I was wrong to dismiss it. The bathrooms are famous across the whole state and they have earned it. I've slept in the worst hotels. I've bowed upon entering. A janitor was polishing the floor with the devotion of a man tending a gun garden he loved, and when I thanked him, he said, Welcome in, which I have since learned is what Texans say instead of hello. And also instead of, I'm glad you exist. I went in for gas. I was inside for nine. 90 minutes. I came out with fudge, a shirt print with a joke, I do not fully understand, $40 of turkey, and a feeling I can only describe as having been to a church. I do not need any of it. I needed all of it. I walked through the great cathedrals of the old world. I lit no candle there. I lit no candle-let buckies either. But I did fill the truck. And now I understand that in Texas, this is the same thing. I go! Alright, you want Johnny D to go next?

SPEAKER_02 44:36

Oh no, you'll make me do that.

SPEAKER_17 44:40

He just stopped by, man. That is so wrong.

SPEAKER_02 44:43

I'm not mentally ready to do that.

SPEAKER_17 44:46

You want to do one, Rom? Look, I don't want to do one, but I will just only mostly just to compete with you. And truthfully, the Dairy Queen one is the best.

SPEAKER_15 44:59

Let's bring this up.

SPEAKER_17 45:04

I apologize in advance. And my Japanese accent sucks too. Oh, alright. So this is a post from somebody on X, uh, Nobunaga.

SPEAKER_14 45:16

In America, I order a milkshake, and the young man turned it upside down over my head. I did not move. A samurai does not flinch, even when the ice cream is above him and gravity is the law. Nothing fell. The cop hung there upside down to find the sky. And the boy held it over me with the calm of a man who has done this 10,000 times and buried his fear long ago. This is the Blizzard. This is Daddy Queen. If it falls, they told me, you get it free. I understood at once. This was not dessert. This was an ordeal. The boy was not showing off. He was swearing an oath with his own arm that he had made the thing thick enough to hang against the earth, and he was betting the price of it on his honor. The flip is not a trick, it is a vow. In my land, a smith proved his blade by cutting. Here, a boy of 17 proves his by turning it over a stranger's head and looking him in the eye while the whole line waits to see if he lies. He did not lie. He set it upright, handed it to me, and said, There you go, man. Then turn to the next customer as if he had not just gambled his good name across a counter. I keep him everything in my pocket. He tried to give it back. He said he's just a blizzard. I told him it was not just a blizzard. I could not explain the rest in English. And there was a line, and he was easy. So I bow instead. He said, You too, man. That answered nothing I had said. It answered everything I had felt. Oh. Oh, bravo. Bravo. All right. Again.

SPEAKER_16 47:12

I I'm sorry. You wanted to do the thing where we roll joints in the the tea ceremony. That's kind of the same.

SPEAKER_17 47:21

Yeah, sure.

SPEAKER_16 47:21

Fair enough. So shut it down.

SPEAKER_17 47:25

Oh God. Anyway. I got more cop clips. You want another cop clip? Uh well, I got a couple of clips I just that are that are fast that are and and or religious. Well, one is kind of religious and political. This one is an oldie but a goodie, right? This basically highlights uh the problem with democracy.

SPEAKER_00 47:46

Because democracy basically means by the people of the people for the people. But the people are retarded.

SPEAKER_16 48:17

I was gonna say that's gonna be a long way to go for this punchline. But the final line, but the people are retarded. This is true. I mean, you know, like I'm the first one to say we need to start, you know, testing people before they can vote. They gotta they got there's gotta be some kind of hurdle. You know, before we go any farther, I gotta tell you something. I got this new fan, LED fan, remote control, six speeds. I can't tell I can't tell one from six. They're all the same speed. It's insane. I think the I think one is low, but six isn't all that much better. It's really wild, but anyway. But high would be usually high should be blowing shit off the table. But anyway, whatever.

SPEAKER_15 49:09

I see.

SPEAKER_17 49:16

I got a clip of an old commercial that aired. Uh actually two clips of old commercials, one from the United States and one from Great Britain. Just to show you how insane censorship and the meaning of word changes, and you know, just it's just shocking that either of these things were ever on air.

SPEAKER_15 49:37

Alright, check out this car salesman.

SPEAKER_11 49:49

You notice the big bald-headed son of a bitch? The man that came to San Francisco to offer them more for the dollar they spend. The man that came to San Francisco to rape each and every citizen and the whole San Francisco Bay Area. You don't believe it? Listen to me. I don't lie. Take a fucking car like this.

SPEAKER_17 50:06

Jesus Christ. This guy is on the war path where it clearly has a vendetta with another dealership, whoever this guy is he's talking about, but he is not holding back, man. No.

SPEAKER_11 50:31

Trying to fuck you out of. Yes, the man. It's one of the prostitute screws and of course trap tables in the city of Las Vegas. I'm sure you've heard about it. So remember this. If you'd like to get fucked and work real hard before you buy a car, come down here. Let Ralph.

SPEAKER_17 50:48

What did Ralph Williams do? Did he fuck his wife? Did he run over his dog? Is he the replacement dog on the car here? Something.

SPEAKER_16 50:56

Just don't forget. They invented they invented meth in World War II. So they still still had it.

SPEAKER_17 51:02

This guy's feedback. And what where did this air? Must have been on like public access or something.

SPEAKER_11 51:09

Ralph Williams do it. Why not? Why not somebody else? Remember our address at 345 El Camino Real in the city of San Bruno. But if you come from Marin County, East Bay Area, San Jose, your money spends just as well as anybody else's. And when this baldheaded son of a bitch gets hold of you, you will spend money. Talking about payments? Five years' payments of $100 a month. You can't get even. So shock before you buy. Face your Christopher Plumma.

SPEAKER_17 51:36

Oh, Jesus. It's just an awesome, awesome video.

SPEAKER_16 51:42

Well, we should spend at least the last five minutes of the of the show over here with my buddy Johnny D. South Florida is one of South Florida's most talented singer and keyboard players. Stop by to hang out, smoke some weed. All right. Well, I think we can call it an episode. We've had a pretty good time. Save a few clips for the next one. I mean, we actually if we have enough clips on it on the email list, we could do several shows. We should maybe even put together a show of just clips.

SPEAKER_17 52:08

Right. Without us commenting on it, it's pretty much just stealing. We can't just put the on them.

SPEAKER_16 52:15

I'm just saying. Just drive right into clips and just bang them out, bam, bam, bam. All right, man. Well, let's get out of here for now. And uh get everybody. Everybody give us a call. Uh give us just just leave us a joke or a comment or uh subscribe. Hit that subscribe button. Leave us a comment. Subscribe, like all that shit. All right, guys. We'll see you next time.

SPEAKER_17 52:41

Thanks, guys.