Follow Up and Grace

The first portion of this episode is follow up from last night’s episode regarding Toxicity in thhe Church. It is important to remember that the whole salavation message is about reconciliation to God through Jesus. Those who have been forgiven much understand the need for forgiveness in others. Our relationships with others is a good indicator of our relationship with Christ.

Transcript

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Hello, everybody. This is Jesse B, and thanks for tuning in to another fun-filled episode of Unfiltered. Um, the first part of this episode is going to be a follow-up to the episode from last night, which was on toxicity in the body of Christ, and probably a podcast short uh may or may not have been the best format for such a topic, uh, trying to squeeze all the information I can into just a few minutes, sometimes challenging. But basically, the reason for that episode was to address the reasons that people who actually want to be in church are leaving as opposed to those who see no need for being in church at all. So the one thing that I want to talk about, though, is it's important to understand that it's easy to point fingers at people, but just keep in mind for every finger that's pointed, there's at least three fingers from that same hand that's pointed back to the pointy. If pointy is even a word, I'd I don't know, but you get my drift. The important thing to remember is that we are all human beings and probably all could be labeled toxic by someone at some point in time in our lives simply because there's no way to make everybody happy. And also because we're human beings. We have faults, we make bad decisions, we do things that in hindsight that we shouldn't have done. That's just all part of the growth process. But toxic is one of those terms that probably gets thrown around more than it should. And obviously, any behavior that threatens a person's health, be it spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical, could easily fall into that category. And then it's appropriate to look at your options, whether that's removing yourself entirely from the situation or at the very least, setting boundaries in those situations. But I'm always going to advise you to seek pastoral counsel. Now, I'm also aware that unfortunately there's times when that's not even an option, but I do encourage you to seek some type of Christian counsel if pastoral counsel is non-existent. So we also need to understand that mirror personality differences, including differences in opinion, doesn't qualify as being toxic. We need to be able to have the maturity level to recognize the differences, and that comes with discernment from the body or from the Holy Spirit. And if you don't have discernment, then ask. James 1 5 says, if any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. Too many times we try to take things into our own hands, figure things out on our own, and then we consult God later, especially when we mess it up. A lot of heartache and carnage could be avoided if we yielded to the instruction and correction of the Holy Spirit rather than the rebellion and let's just face it, the stupidity of the flesh. Which brings me to the following verses. Hebrews four sixteen says, Let us with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive grace, or excuse me, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in times of need. Titus three five says He saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to His own mercy. Ephesians two, four, and five says God being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ. So you guessed it. This portion of the segment we're going to be talking about God's grace and mercy toward us. Now, the biblical definition, which is really the only definition that matters, defines grace as God's unmerited favor, his active benevolence, love, and assistance given to humanity completely free. And it's not something that we've earned through good deeds or moral perfection. It is a gift from God. Mercy is also another gift, and it's God withholding punishment that humanity actually deserves. So the best illustration, in my opinion, is found in the parable Jesus Told, as recorded in Matthew 18, 21 through 35. And you can read this account on your own, but I'm going to get to briefly point out the key factors. There was a king that settled debts with his servants, and he brought one in who owed him 10,000 talents. Unable to pay, the king ordered not only the servant, but his wife, including his children, all to be sold into slavery to recoup those losses. However, the master did have mercy because the servant begged for patience, and the king, moved with compassion, forgave the entire insurmountable debt. So right after leaving that same servant found a fellow servant who owed him just one hundred denarii. He grabbed him, began choking him, and demanded immediate payment. Even though the second servant used the exact same plea for patience, the first servant refused and had him thrown into prison until that debt was paid. Outraged by the hypocrisy, the other servants reported the incident to the king, and the king called that ungrateful servant back, revoked his forgiveness, and handed him over to torturers until he could pay back his original astronomical debt. Now keep that in mind as I tell you this true story. Within the past couple of years I have had countless conversations with an individual who has held on to unforgiveness going back fifteen years and maybe even beyond. Talking things out was not an option. Accepting any form of contact from that other party was not an option. This person was just done. However, they continued to hang on to the anger, the hatred, and the constant replaying of the scenarios over and over again like it was yesterday. And see, the problem with stewing is that it's often a one-sided scenario based on opinion and emotions. And if you're mature enough, you realize that opinions, especially when they're fueled by emotions, are not always equivalent of facts. In fact, without trying to sound redundant in my words, when it gets to that situation, the farther and farther away it goes from the truth, and you're equating opinions and emotions with facts and things that never really happened. So then a few years later it was someone else and a guilt by association type situation. So there's two people that this person cut out of their life, and then a few years later, an entirely different situation involving entirely different people was now on the list. And then another, then another, and another, and yet recently another. Several people, all in the same family that this person will not speak to. So unless God does a major overhaul where they have nowhere to look but up, there's probably going to be more people that this person will isolate from. But we all need to think who is the common denominator in all this. Sadly, it's the person that's withholding unforgiv or that's harboring unforgiveness, which leads this person to isolate, live a lonely, miserable life, constant anger, depression, uh, paranoid of others, distrusting, etc. And when I asked what the end goal was, what this person was hoping to accomplish by hanging on to all this anger and hatred and unforgiveness, there was no definite response. Only that they were angry, they were hurt, and somebody's gonna have to pay. So this person, claiming to be a Christian, was asked if their standards for forgiveness was higher than that of God's. And the answer was maybe. Shockingly, the answer was maybe. Now, those who have been shown grace and mercy and forgiveness should be the first to respond likewise. Luke seven forty-seven, Jesus said, Therefore I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little also loves little. You can go back and read that account of the woman who washed Jesus' feet with her tears because she was aware of her brokenness and the massive grace that she received. You see, the depth of our love for God and for others is a direct link to how clearly we recognize our own need for grace and forgiveness. Recognizing that we have been forgiven for much should remove the desire to judge others. And when we fail at this, it isn't out of lack of gratitude. I mean, after all, that ungrateful servant was forgiven his insurmountable debt, and he was grateful to the king. And after all, we too are grateful when we have also been forgiven. But also, we, just like the servant who refused forgiveness of the debt of one of our peers, just like the servant did of one of his peers, is hypocrisy at its finest, and Jesus spoke harshly about hypocrisy. Actually, he compared hypocrites to whitewashed tombs. They're pretty on the outside, but they're full of nothing but death and decay on the inside. Another example Jesus used when talking about hypocrites was removing the plank from our own eye before even attempting to remove the speck out of somebody else's eye. But back to the parable of the ungrateful servant. The king heard about the servant's actions towards someone else and had that same servant that he had forgiven, had him rearrested and handed over to the tormentors until he could repay the original debt. Jesus concluded by stating that God will act in a similar way toward those who do not forgive their brothers and sisters from the heart. Now if a person refuses to be reconciled, that's their problem, not yours. Just as we have seen in the parable of the ungrateful servant, let them isolate, let them act immaturely. Let them talk about you if they feel the need, because at that point they have become nothing more than a mouthpiece for demons, whether they realize it or not. And you might be thinking that that's pretty a harsh statement, Jesse, but the truth hurts. Because who is the accuser of the brethren? Satan. The thing to remember is that this person may be a Christian, but in label only, because their lives say something totally different. People like that often have a track record in a history of instability and carnage in their wake. And as I was preparing this, the Holy Spirit brought up terms such as witchcraft, narcissism, and counterfeit. But it's not to be confused with someone who is a new Christian and just like a baby learning how to walk, a Christian is gonna fall and get bumps and bruises along the way, but they're learning. Or it could be someone who is a seasoned Christian and maybe they've made a mistake, or you know, maybe they have fallen in some way or another, but they're still teachable and they still have a heart to please God. The person that I'm describing wants to know just enough Bible to condemn and or control somebody else. They're not interested in living a life of grace or showing grace or living a life to please the Lord. They often act as authorities unto themselves. And it doesn't take long for people to see that something is off. And like I mentioned yesterday, we will know them by their fruit, and that's scriptural, and it's found in Matthew six or excuse me, Matthew seven, sixteen through twenty. And we also need to remember that just as we will know a Christian by their fruit, people will also know us by our fruit. To those who may be struggling with the idea of forgiveness, I realize that hurt hurts. I know that. I know what it's like to be betrayed, lied about, talked about, accused, um, ignored by those who are supposed to love you and that you're supposed to love and trust. And it's hard. It's hard to take, and it can be downright heartbreaking and even traumatic, especially when offenses come from those that, uh, be it in our family or even our church family that we're supposed to love and trust and honor. And we expect better, but the truth is we're all flawed individuals who are in need of the saving grace of Jesus. And it doesn't matter if you have been a Christian for a day or a hundred years. While we're living on this earth, we still need the forgiveness from God because, like I said, nobody is perfect. And I mentioned excellence, aka being blameless. That is only guaranteed through the blood of Jesus. We can do penance for the rest of our lives, and we can be sorry for the rest of our lives, and you know, we can live to the letter of the law, but until we surrender to Jesus and put it under his blood, it's dead works, and that means nothing in the end. Jesus made it clear in John fourteen, six, when he said, I am the way, the truth, and the life, and no man cometh to the Father but by me. We still need the correction and instruction and guidance of the Holy Spirit, or else we couldn't walk this walk on our own. And another thing to think about when we withhold forgiveness from others, we are in fact usurping God's authority, and this is very dangerous territory to be on. Galatians 6 7 warns, be not deceived. God is not mocked for whatever a man or a woman soweth, that he or she shall also reap. As always, thank you for listening. And if you enjoyed this content and think that it might go over with somebody else, please share it. And also don't forget to subscribe if you haven't already. Life is hard and people are difficult, and let's just be frank, some people are just freaking nuts. But we serve a great God. We serve a God with infinite love, mercy, and forgiveness for all of us. So let's not forget to pray for each other. And any grievances that you have, please take them to the Lord first. Ask for his guidance, his direction, and don't get in his way, but partner with him and work everything out. His plan is always the best. I love you guys. Take care. Good night.