Episode 8 – Why Understanding the “How” Matters

Before I continue the timeline of what happened to me, I wanted to pause for a moment and talk about something that is critical to understanding these scams — the “how.”

In this episode I step back from the mechanics of the story to explain why understanding how these romance scams actually take hold is so important. These operations are not simple financial scams. They are carefully orchestrated emotional manipulations designed to build trust, create connection, and slowly guide victims toward decisions that feel real in the moment.

I’m not sharing this to lecture anyone. I’m sharing it because I wish someone had explained these things to me before it happened.

If understanding the how helps even one person recognize the warning signs early, block a message, or walk away from a situation that feels wrong, then sharing this painful experience again, will be worth it.

In the next episode, I will return with very specific instances of the mechanics related to the financial transactioons...

In the next episode, I return to the timeline and begin walking through the specific moments when the financial mechanics of the scam began to unfold.

If you would like to learn more about my experience, understand it in full detail as you move along with these podcast episodes, here is a link to my book on Amazon.  This is not about sales, this is about eductation, prevention, passing information on, staying safe and protecting what you have.

https://a.co/d/00uitI9U

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Hey good afternoon.

Purpose of These Podcasts

These Podcasts Are not for Entertainment

Relationships Seem Real - Difficult to Walk Away From

Walk Away - NOW

You be the Ghost

Manipulation Beings the Moment you Respond

Understanding How is the First Step in Forgiveness and Healing

No Response and you are Left With the Carnage

Pay Attenen to the Still Small Voice

SPEAKER_01 0:06

This is episode eight of examining the anatomy of the modern romance scams. Today is Sunday, March fifteenth. I'm Michael B. And I want to welcome you back as we continue discussing the very real threat of online romance scams. The purpose of these podcasts is simple to share what happened to me so that maybe someone listening recognizes the warning signs before it's too late. These scams can happen to anyone. Age doesn't matter, education doesn't matter. Your sexual preference does not matter. Intelligence does not matter. These happen to everyday people. And before we continue, I want to thank you to those who've been listening and commenting. I truly appreciate the time you're we're spending here, and I hope that what we're discussing helps someone avoid the road I went down. I want to clarify something today that, however, I'm not lecturing. If it ever sounds like that, please understand this is not my intention. I'm sharing this experience because I wish someone had explained these things to me before it happened. These podcasts are not meant for entertainment. The only reason I hope thousands of people hear them is not for attention or nor nor notoriety. It's because maybe one person will see a message, come across their phone, pause for a moment, and decide not to respond. Maybe someone will block that message, someone will close that door, and if that happens even once, this will have been worth it. Today's Sunday, I've talked to my wife about these podcasts. If you're listening today, maybe you're in a situation like the one I was in. If you manage to recognize it and pull out of it early, good for you. That takes courage. These scams are incredibly difficult to exit because they're designed to feel real. The relationship feels real. The goals that you're making feel real and tangible. The investments feel real, but I can tell you from experience, they are not. No one is going to teach you legitimate cryptocurrency investment over the internet. Okay, let me repeat that. No one is going to teach you legitimate cryptocurrency investing over the internet. I may sound like a broken record when I say that, but after speaking with law enforcement, their advice was very simple. They have one word for it, and that is run. I have three words for it. My advice is to run like hell. If someone online is asking you to send money, cryptocurrency, or teaching you how to invest or show you how to invest, someone you may never have met in person, you're in serious, dangerous territory. I'm just going to tell you that right now. Here's the advice: walk away. Walk away and do not look back. Block them on your phone. Do not go back and look and see if they're speaking with you. I'm telling you, going back to that is so dangerous. I can't even express how dangerous that is. Eventually, the day is going to come when you have nothing left to give. And when that moment arrives, the messages will stop. And you'll you're going to be ghosted. And that's when the real damage begins. That's the moment of beginning of your recovery, even though it doesn't feel like it. And that road back is long. And there will be daily reminders of the damage that were what was done. I mean serious gut punches. It's one of the reasons that this series exists. If anything I say sounds familiar in your situation, get out now, please. Delete that person, block them, and walk away. You be the ghost. Do not go back, even if you feel the urge to. Everything about these operations is designed to pull you back in to this relationship is so serious, it feels so real that it may even feel like, again, like a replacement of the relationships that you have in place. They are not, okay. Let me repeat that. Scams are not just financial crimes. Now I use the word crimes intentionally. These are crimes. All right. The FBI refers to them as crimes. And you'll know that when this is done, if it unfortunately goes till the end to where you're ghosted and you refer this to the FBI, you're going to understand that you're that you've been a victim of pig butchering and you are the victim of a financial crime, as well as your family. So you need to think about that. Okay, and I want to circle back on that before we close. But these are emotional manipulation operations, okay? They are designed to override intellectual thought through emotional connection. The people running these operations are trained to do exactly that. That is why they do this every single day, and they do this every single day. They're patient, they build relationships, they build trust. And once that trust is established, the manipulation continues. Now it doesn't begin, it begins the moment you respond back. All right. This is why this series is called The Anatomy of Modern Romance Scams. We're breaking these operations down piece by piece so that people can understand how they work. The financial loss is painful. There's no question about that. But sometimes the deeper damage happens somewhere else entirely. These scams damage relationships, they affect families, and the ripple effects spread far beyond the person who is targeted. Everybody who's impacted lives this with you. That's why it's so important to understand how these scams operate. Understanding the how can help families understand what happened. And that understanding is often the first step towards forgiveness and healing. What happened and how it happened is easy to understand. It's right there, wide open, ready for examination, and easy to understand. That's why we need to talk about the how. That's why this is an examination of the how. That's why these podcasts will be more than eight. Okay. We are breaking it down to understand the anatomy. Okay. We're going to dissect that until we we understand how this happens because there's many facets to it and how it's orchestrated. And healing is going to look different for everyone. But I want to stress the how is how families again begin to understand what's happening, and that understanding again is often the first step towards forgiveness and healing. Okay. In the next episode, we'll we'll return to the timeline of what happened and begin discussing again the stages where financial pressure begins to increase, and the actual mechanics of how it happens, so that you can understand that. How did it go from just a small investment to major financial losses? Okay. Until then, if you if you are listening and something about the situation sounds familiar to you, please take the safest path available. Step away. Just please step away. It will be challenging because it will look like a very familiar, very comfortable relationship, and everything seems just right. Everything seems fine. But again, I'm telling you, it's not. And there'll be no response. All right. And you are left with what you're left to deal with. And that's gonna be the challenge. So one last comment before we close, okay? You're probably gonna get a few fleeting glimpses of what I'm gonna say, intellectual reality, right? These just can't, this can't be real. We can't be making this kind of money. That old adage of if it looks too good to be true, it probably is, and that's gonna fit like a size 10 or whatever shoe size you wear, because that's exactly what's going on. Okay, it's just it's just too good to be true. And I want to make one last comment on that. It's not greed that drives, right? It's the ability to finally make those dreams happen financially. For me, that was the biggest driver, right? All those dreams that you give up as a young man because you just can't afford them, as a middle-aged man because you just can't afford them, and then as an older man because you just can't afford them, and all of a sudden it looks like you can, and you want to put those pieces together before your time on earth is over. Okay, you just want to get it done, and there's a lot of different drivers for everybody, all right? But pay attention to those still small voices, pay attention to that flashing red light in the back of your head that just you know, every once in a while flashes that message of this relationship is just too easy. Making the kind of money that we're making is just too easy. Okay, those are red flags. Please pay attention to them. Let your intellect override your emotions in this situation, in this relationship. If you start getting those fleeting glimpses, pay attention to them and act on them, step away, block, delete, and walk away. Because you're already in some very serious trouble. Again, these podcasts are not meant to entertain, they are just meant to help you understand how these happen, how they work, and how to avoid them. And that's my prayer, and that's why I'm doing this, and that's why I'm reliving the plain the pain of this every day and every time I record. So thank you for being with me. Thank you for listening. Thank you for sharing these with the people that you love, okay? Because it's important that we talk about these things, it's important that we understand the how these work, so that they stop proliferating around the globe, so that people stop losing billions, so that relationships stop getting destroyed, so that you don't have to live with the daily pain of the repercussions of what these create. Again, I want to thank you for listening. Thank you for your patron, patronage with these podcasts. Thank you for my slip-ups and overlooking those, anything, dogs barking, doorbells, whatever. I'm not a professional podcaster. I'm just trying to tell you what happened to me. Don't let it happen to you. We'll pick you up on the next episode. I'm Michael B.

SPEAKER_00 15:30

Until then, stay safe.