He Was Too Young to Suffer This Much… and What He Saw on the Other Side

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Is it a hallucination if the man you saw was wearing a coat no living person knew existed? Zach Tavkar was 14, cancerous, barely standing. And then he wasn't standing at all. What came next is what he brought to NDE Journey.

SPEAKER_02 0:19

My name is Zach Tavcar. I am currently a mind, body, spirit life coach. I work uh primarily in the fitness facility in the fitness world. Um, but I do a lot of uh I also do quantum healing hypnosis um therapy or technique, which is a form of hypnosis, uh, where you can kind of contact your subconscious, your inner being, and have conversations that way and get healing, physical, mental, emotional, spiritual healing. And uh yeah, I do life coaching on the side as well. And I had an NDE at 14 years old while I was in the midst of going through treatment for leukemia. I was the golden boy, I everything was going well. Girls liked me. I was successful in everything that I tried and seemed like I was gonna have a pretty easy life. Uh, good parent, great parents, great family, two younger brothers. Um, you know, I couldn't have asked for a better upbringing from the people that were surrounding me, and then I was diagnosed at 14. I went into remission pretty immediately. I then relapsed at 16, and at 16 I had a bone marrow transplant. And when I was 21, I was finally considered cured. So leading up to the day I had been in the hospital pretty consistently for about two and a half months at that time. I was diagnosed in August, late August of 2020 or 2020. Um, did my first 30 months or 30 days in the hospital, an induction phase where they give you lots of chemo to try to get the leukemia into remission. So my body had lost all the muscle that I uh had gained, that I've my you know, my young 14-year-old physical body had lost all the muscle. I still have all the stretch marks on the side of my legs from losing that muscle so rapidly. Got out of the hospital. Uh two days later, the broviat catheter that was in my chest that was giving, it was pretty much acting as a permanent IV, clotted. I got an infection, so I had to go back to Oakland Children's Hospital.

SPEAKER_01 2:31

And in Oakland Children's Hospital, they said, Oh, you have a blood clot on your catheter.

SPEAKER_02 2:36

So we're gonna have to give you an angio uh an angioplasty, which I just had another one two weeks ago, uh unfortunately for me. But uh had an angioplasty where they had to remove the clot and take the catheter out, uh, had the infection, spent another five, five or six weeks in the hospital. Uh so it was about, you know, alone total, about 10 weeks of hospital time. When I got out of the hospital, my or when I realized that I had gotten started getting out of the hospital and started walking, my lower back, my uh lumbar vertebrae uh had collapsed. I had a lot of back pain. And I was like, I don't know why I'm having this back pain. So I had fractures in my in three lower vertebrae, lumbar vertebrae, two, three, and four. I had these uh you know compression fractures. So I had to get a back brace fitting. And that's the day that I was going to get the back brace fitting. And so I just woke up, got some uh blood draw, uh, they took some blood and then went to the back brace technician. It was just a little office, you know, off a side street. So, because my body I'm was so depleted from that 10 weeks of chemotherapy, an infection, you know, my spine collapsed, all types of things. So my body was just so depleted. I was at the lowest point uh physically that I'd been in my whole life up to then. And so I was just kind of hanging out uh on these little parallel-like bars while the technician was taking measurements. And as he was taking measurements, I started to feel fuzzy, which I'd felt many times prior to this. I'd probably pass out five to ten times already, just from like low blood counts being weak, all that stuff. And what happened was I just started getting fuzzier and fuzzier and weaker and weaker as I was holding myself up on these little like metal parallel bars as he's taking my measurements. 30 minutes later, I start walking out of the little technician's office, and I knew I'm gonna like I'm gonna go out. I can feel myself. So I just tried to walk in as fast as I could to my dad's truck. My dad was uh with me with my five, Jake was four at the time, my four-year-old brother at the time. And the they were kind of trailing behind me because my dad was talking with the technicians. They were friends from like music industry. And I sat on the lip, you know, the little part where you step up into the truck bed, not the actual bed itself, but just on the lip of my dad's truck, put my elbows on my knees, and that tunnel vision just started like coming in, and in in and I looked at my dad, and he was about 30 to 40 yards away from me, and I said, Dad, I'm gonna pass. And then all I remember is going black, and then being in this beautiful luminescent tunnel of white, golden-y, silvery light. And I just felt this beautiful, like liquid, I like to call it like liquid love, this just just being immersed in this state of peace and serenity and ease and flow and love. And then I looked forward and I saw this shadow figure, the silhouette shadow figure that I immediately thought, oh, that's my grandpa Joe. That's my dad, he's my dad's dad who had died when I was seven. And he was just this silhouette with like a trench coat on. And so we had this, you know, telepathic communication. And it seemed like it went on for forever, but all that my conscious mind took back with me was that him saying, You're gonna be all right, you're gonna be okay, you just have to keep going. You're gonna be all right, everything's gonna be okay, you just have to keep going. And so it seemed like we just existed for forever in this space, and it was just, you know, bliss, pure bliss. And then all of a sudden, I felt myself get sucked back. And then all of a sudden, I was in my body, and I could, you know, I couldn't really move my nervous system. My nervous system was just like not online, but I could hear my dad going, Zach, Zach, wake up. Are you okay, Zach? Are you okay? And then a secondary voice saying, Is he okay? You want me to call 911? My dad's like, No, no, no, he just passed out, he's okay. And so I was able to, I couldn't really open my eyes or move yet, but I was able to speak somehow, and I just said, you know, I I can hear you, I just can't really move yet. Excuse me. And so when I did open my eyes, I had my dad kneeling over me and my little brother over his shoulder, terrified, and then this third guy who happened to be a bystander who saw me fall over and pass out. And then they just we just got me up and my dad got me to the, you know, got me into his truck and he took me to the healthiest place possible, McDonald's, and I had like something to just get my blood sugar up and you know, whatever, nourish me as much as McDonald's can nourish you. Hate to you know, hate on McDonald's. Um, but then you know, I just kind of just had this image in my mind, you know, like I couldn't get that kind of that experience out of my head. So I was trying, I'm you know, 14, and uh I was trying to rationalize it, and I, you know, I just was like, huh, that was just a weird, crazy, weird experience. Maybe I hallucinated, I don't know. So then my uh dad, I told him a few weeks later, because I just wanted him to know we were getting closer at that time, like really close. And I just you know pulled him aside and said, you know, I don't want to like freak you out, but I saw Grandpa Joe in this tunnel of white light when I passed out. And he got pretty concerned. He was like, you know, oh my God, what did he say? Did he say you're gonna die, like, you know, I'm going through cancer treatment, and all of a sudden I his son sees his dead dad. And I was like, no, he said everything's gonna be okay, everything's gonna be all right. I just have to keep going. And I said, but it was weird because I saw him in a like a trench coat, like a long trench coat, and I didn't, I'd never seen him in a trench coat up until that time. Like I had always known him in just short kind of business jackets, like you know, four-piece jackets or whatever, three-piece suits. And so a few weeks later, a month later, my dad came back and he goes, Is this what you saw? And it was a picture of my grandpa Joe when he was a young man in Prague wearing a trench coat at that length. So that was kind of uh it was it was like the universe, you know, source, God, whatever's trying to give me this like you did have this experience. And I wanted to truly believe it, but I still was, you know, at 14, it was like, oh, that was really real. It was very vivid, but my brain still couldn't really um integrate that yet. And that was the experience. Suffering is a state of the mind, right? My suffering is a result of me not accepting this moment as it is and wanting it to be this way, right? I want the outcome. So I had a I had a stent placed in my coronary artery two weeks ago, uh almost two weeks ago, Thursday the 18th, which is shocking, right? Because I'm I'm a vegan, I'm in I'm 38 years old, I'm incredibly healthy, I exercise five days a week. Like it's the none of the doctors could figure it out. And so there's physical reasons for me, most likely COVID caused it for me. Um, but when I was in the hospital waiting the whole day for them, because I was the most stable cardiac patient they had on the floor all day, to have the stent placed, I had this moment where I had to observe my mind. And I really wanted this outcome to be like I had myocarditis. So I just had swelling in my heart and I've been experiencing chest pain since January, right? Eight months. And I wanted it to just be that my heart from the scan was kind of swelling and blocking the the the artery, the the the widowmaker artery. I wanted it to be that because I knew I could just take medication and then it would be better. But the likely route was that I had a block in that widowmaker. I had a plaque buildup, and I was gonna need a stent. And so it was all day long while my mom's sitting with me, my wife's working, my mom's sitting with me, and my mom's just talking, talking, talking, trying to keep my mind busy because she could see I was mulling something over. But I really just wanted to watch my mind and how my mind kept wanting to go away from the stent route and go towards the myocarditis route. But then I started recognizing afterwards both routes, right? Obviously, I had to go the stent route. It is what it is. Both routes led to the same outcome. And so I had this opportunity in that moment to go, oh, I could have just accepted that both routes are gonna lead to the same outcome. And I can just surrender. It's been a big thing of mine the last six months, surrender and accept that both of these outcomes are gonna lead to this, or both of these routes are gonna lead to the same outcome. So the suffering for me was trying to control, go this way, trying to talk my mind, my body into it all day long. Come on, just let it be. Just open up as you can. Come on, spirit guides, come through me and open up my heart. Council of eleven, come through me and open up my heart. And they're like, no, no, no, no, no. This is your journey, right? This is your journey of understanding that these routes, no matter what you think they are, you don't have the whole perspective like we do. So accept that these both both of these routes are outcomes or are potential uh routes, journeys, paths to the same outcome. And so that is just my little short most recent experience of accepting. The outcome will likely be assured. And so accept that you have these different routes in life and listen to those intuitive signals and the omens and the signs outwardly that are guiding you along the way. So the best way to do that is by staying present in the moment. Because if I'm always looking for this paths, you know, way, but the universe, my spirit guides God, wants me to go like this and then like this and then like this, and then I'll get there. I can't possibly take that fun journey if I'm afraid of going that way because it feels like I'm going away from the way I think it should be.

SPEAKER_01 13:01

So that's why I think we suffer. I took away that everything is is fine in the end.

SPEAKER_02 13:08

Like the fear that we possess in in our daily lives and in in the fear of the unknown and what's gonna happen afterwards. Um the the peace that I felt it assured me that like that is where every human being at the end of their physical existence will go, regardless of how good or bad you were. No matter, and people don't want to hear that, but that's where you're going. So you for me it was uh you might as well make the best that you possibly can of this physical existence, but um unfold your own myth, right? Unfold your own journey, right and be present with every moment that you possibly can be, because those moments are what make the journey back there so much more enjoyable. The journey it sucks, it's a roller coaster ride, but at the end, you left you left from Reno where I'm at, and I'm going back to Reno at the end. So as I go through this journey of life and meet new people and have experiences, I might as well stay as as present as I possibly can and and and feel myself through that that journey until I get back to that place because that's where I'm going, and that's where Moe's going, and that's where everyone who's watching this is going.

SPEAKER_01 14:36

If I could tell people one thing, I change this every time somebody asks me that question. Right now I would say that everything's okay. Your your outcomes are assured.

SPEAKER_02 14:53

Be in this moment, accept where you are, be eager for where you're going, and surrender because that is the in in my heart, that is the most powerful way to get to where you truly want to be, is the surrender and the faith, right? There is faith and surrender. So the faith is a huge component of our life, and so just accept this moment as it is. It's here, you can't change it. Surrender to what the path is going to be and look for all the beauty that is gonna come about moment by moment, either intuitively or externally. But either way, all is God, right? All is source, and so you're gonna be getting signs in all these different areas, and follow those signs, everything's okay. You're gonna go back to where you were, and then you'll do it again.

SPEAKER_01 15:46

So you might as well have fun while you're in the middle.